hoomhum
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Summary
Trapped by spells of obedience, the Witcher Alphas who remain serve as play things for the rich and powerful ruling class omegas.
Jaskier has never believed in Alpha inferiority, but he too is trapped by the rules of society that subjugate the monster hunters of legend. When he ends up holding the leash of two Witchers, it will take cunning, determination, and trust to find a way out for all three of them.
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Double Down by hoomhum
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game)
16 Feb 2026
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Summary
Geralt and the team once again ally with known art thief Jaskier to pursue an even bigger threat. A mysterious thief from Jaskier's past is more than he seems. What will they learn along the way to catching this apparent copy-cat?
Series
- Part 3 of Thiefskier
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Summary
"Think about it." Lambert sits up, batting Geralt's hands away again. "This whole keep filled with alphas, no omegas around. Humans barely want anything to do with us, not like they can find any satisfaction there."
"Pseudo-omegas kept the peace," Vesemir picks up, unexpectedly. "They always did, even before we had the potion for them."
"Pseudo-omegas?"
"The youngest adepts to have passed their final trial," Vesemir grunts. "We all did it. Spent a year being spoiled by and serving those who came before us."
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The Fettered Lark by hoomhum
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
27 Jan 2026
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Summary
While the Witchers wintered at Kaer Mohren, Kaedwen rotted below them. One casualty of that rot was the voice of a bard, taken by a sorceress in the court of a monstrous king and suddenly the Wolves can no longer justify holding themselves apart from politics. Can they break the curse, and if they do, what else might they gain along the way?
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When Lambert finally invites him to Kaer Morhen, Aiden learns of the Wolves' traditional fight over the Role of Deferent. He also learns that his beloved wolf regularly fucks his brothers-in-arms outside of the twice a season ritual sex.
He has absolutely zero objections.
Series
- Part 2 of The Deferent
Recent series
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The Deferent by hoomhum
Fandom Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
26 Nov 2024
- Words:
- 13,842
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 20
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Thiefskier by hoomhum
Fandom The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
16 Feb 2026
- Words:
- 47,296
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 28
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Fill Up the Gaps by hoomhum
Fandom Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
02 Feb 2022
- Words:
- 22,426
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 1
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- Words:
- 46
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 6
Recent bookmarks
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Rumours of the Witchers' Bard by Chrissy22
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
21 Mar 2026
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Summary
Over the years, Jaskier gets a reputation amongst witchers as the guy who will get you out of bind if you need him to. He’s the witchers’ bard, after all. Need a hand with your injuries? A safe place to hide? A friendly face? Find Jaskier.
Jaskier, on the other hand, has no idea why witchers in trouble keep bumping into him on the road, but fate is funny that way, isn’t it? He’s certainly not going to turn them away
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,869
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 255
- Kudos:
- 1,743
- Bookmarks:
- 506
- Hits:
- 13,160
Bookmarked by hoomhum
08 May 2026
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Summary
It’s a stupid curse.
Like, a really, really brain-dead nonsense pointless curse. Seriously, what is even the point?
Jaskier is a horse.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,959
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 19
- Kudos:
- 163
- Bookmarks:
- 24
- Hits:
- 955
Bookmarked by hoomhum
08 Mar 2026
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History Teaches Us by Drenagon
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
01 Apr 2014
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Summary
To reclaim their kingdom, the Company of Thorin Oakenshield will need all the help they can get.
Series
- Part 1 of Lessons Well Learnt
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 200,059
- Chapters:
- 35/35
- Collections:
- 12
- Comments:
- 2,639
- Kudos:
- 4,456
- Bookmarks:
- 1,388
- Hits:
- 167,762
Bookmarked by hoomhum
09 Feb 2017
Bookmarker's Notes
Thorin comes back with some much needed sense and gains many allies. Nori and Gloin.
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An Expected Journey by MarieJacquelyn
Fandoms: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Hobbit - All Media Types, TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
29 Jul 2014
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Summary
“I just wish…”
“What do you wish?”
“I wish I could have changed it all.”
For years Bilbo has written about his adventures and told stories about his dealings with dwarves and dragons. To most it seemed like fanciful nonsense but to Bilbo it was all very real. A weight followed him home from his travels, one called regret. Now in his final moments Bilbo has a choice to make – go quietly into death’s embrace or go back again and face all the fear and pain for the chance to make things right?
Of course, change is a fickle thing and not everything can be done again as Bilbo is about to find out. In the end, it may not only be salvation that he’s fighting for.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 294,517
- Chapters:
- 70/70
- Collections:
- 26
- Comments:
- 5,481
- Kudos:
- 15,405
- Bookmarks:
- 4,948
- Hits:
- 664,993
Bookmarked by hoomhum
11 Mar 2016
Bookmarker's Notes
the one with eggs and like 10 chapters of angst at the end, before the happy ending
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BatMuppet by Demorra (thebibliosphere)
Fandoms: The Muppets - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types
09 Mar 2026
Tags
Summary
“It’s time to play the music, it’s time to light the lights,
It’s time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show tonight!”The manor ought to have been silent as the grave when Bruce returned, so it caught him by surprise when he heard a familiar jingle drifting through the empty halls. He paused at the foot of the grand staircase, head tilted to the side as he listened to the Muppet Show theme song jangling away happily. It sounded like it was coming from the first floor, which meant the most likely origin was Dick's bedroom. Which would be fine, if it also wasn't almost three am.
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What do you do when you come home late and find the orphan you've taken guardianship of is crying alone in his room watching the Muppets?
You sit your brooding ass down and join him.
And if you later end up on a talk show with said Muppets and end up embroiled in a running gag about your playboy persona being in a throuple with Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog, well, it's not like anyone's ever going to believe you're Batman now...Based on the Tumblr shitpost.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,995
- Chapters:
- 5/?
- Comments:
- 981
- Kudos:
- 1,828
- Bookmarks:
- 422
- Hits:
- 15,953
Bookmarked by hoomhum
10 Dec 2025