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Will you come to my bayou this weekend? by Petunia Honey (Celeste_Raccoon)
Fandoms: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon)
15 May 2026
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Summary
Alastor has a shit day at work, which calls for a night of recovery in his secret shack in his bayou. He's known since he was alive that partnered sex is a huge waste of time. Despite his libido, he rarely experiences sexual attraction, and is content with taking care of himself. He recently starts questioning his attraction to an old pal, and impulsively calls him to see if it's worth acting on it.
Vox has cabin fever after being cooped up in the V tower for 3 months. When Alastor calls him to hang out, he's pissed but so starved of social interaction that he doesn't decline. Murder, smut, and relationship anarchy ensue.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
11 Apr 2026
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A single, sharp thump against his ribs. Hard enough to feel. Hard enough that his breath hitched. He couldn’t stop watching Vox. Vox shining. Vox gloating. Vox destroying the King of Hell in front of thousands. Vox basking in triumph like it was a second skin.
The cameras zoomed in on his grin. The curve of neon light across his face, lit like desire or malice or both. Alastor’s fingers flexed against the restraints. The ropes burned. He liked it. Hated that he liked it. His smile didn’t break, but it faltered, just a flicker, a millisecond, a glitch. He felt heat coil in his gut, something foreign and unwelcome and dangerously alive.
“Damn you,” he whispered, barely audible, his radio voice cracking beneath the words.
(Alastor reconsiders his feelings? for Vox after the Vox Populi performance)Series
- Part 2 of part-time soulmate, full-time problem
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,942
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 180
- Kudos:
- 1,162
- Bookmarks:
- 237
- Hits:
- 16,041
Bookmarked by sto7itz
17 Mar 2026
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New Orleans, 1933.
Vincent Whittman’s assignment (punishment) seems simple enough: recruit Mr. Alastor Hartfelt, the city’s famed radio star.
But his trip derails the moment he meets the man dressed in a smile too sharp, with secrets too deep, and a presence that hums with something far beyond him.
One broken ritual binds them for decades, pulling them back to each other again and again, to the one soul neither can quite break away from.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 178,917
- Chapters:
- 9/18
- Comments:
- 1,099
- Kudos:
- 4,160
- Bookmarks:
- 1,067
- Hits:
- 133,066
Bookmarked by sto7itz
25 Feb 2026
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Summary
After an eventful night out at the bar, Alastor decides to go up with Vincent to his apartment.
[direct sequel to previous work in series, please read that first for context!]
Series
- Part 2 of more murdermedia
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,878
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 54
- Kudos:
- 225
- Bookmarks:
- 24
- Hits:
- 2,339
Bookmarked by sto7itz
24 Feb 2026
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Summary
Vox finds out Alastor is a virgin and convinces him to let Vox take his virginity.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
18 Feb 2026
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Summary
After being held in Alastor’s shed for several days, Vincent is promoted from being his captive, to officially being his partner-in-crime!
Of course, their transition into partnership has its difficulties, as Vincent feels like dead weight, and seeks reassurance that he is truly valued and needed by Alastor.
Series
- Part 4 of murdermedia
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,677
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 33
- Kudos:
- 125
- Bookmarks:
- 12
- Hits:
- 1,660
Bookmarked by sto7itz
18 Feb 2026
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Summary
Alastor doesn’t pull his hand away, in spite of how he’d very much like to.
Typically—this is a game reserved for a disgusting pig of a white man that he’s been stalking for a few weeks now, at the bare minimum. Perhaps a few months, even. He’s not certain this one qualifies yet to be on the main list, but he does tick all of the preliminary boxes. He’d make for terrible prey, though, Alastor sadly notes. A high profile white man from New York that has come down to specifically chase after him? No, no, that won’t do. He can’t kill this man. It would fall back onto him immediately.
Buuuut, he is still having a bit of fun, laying out a few honey traps here and there, for whatever reason. Just in case.
~
1930s Human AU. Newscastor (and CBS Executive) Vincent goes to New Orleans to scout some new talent. He gets a lot more than either of them bargain for in a particular small-time radio host.
Series
- Part 1 of Rot Next To You
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 128,799
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Comments:
- 308
- Kudos:
- 1,274
- Bookmarks:
- 311
- Hits:
- 46,450
Bookmarked by sto7itz
05 Feb 2026
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Summary
“I swear I ain’t a fag, Al,” Vincent whined, the words raw and frantic, soaked in every ugly thing the world had ever taught him about wanting this. “Swear on my mother, it’s just you. Every time I look at you I just wanna—”
or: New Orleans, 1920s; Al loses a bet to his buddy Vincent and has to wear drag. This Better Not Awaken Anything In Vinnie.
Series
- Part 1 of The Paradise Lounge
Bookmarked by sto7itz
03 Jan 2026
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Summary
Pre-Season 1 VoxAl oneshot fic
Mind the tags please! There's nothing TOO crazy, but it might not be for everyone!Summary:
Alastor and Vox have an arrangement where Alastor allows him over once a week so that Vox can take care of his perverted needs.
The deal is- no touching! >:)
That is... until Alastor decides he wants to try something a little different- consensual hypnosis where Vox can do as he pleases and show that Alastor can enjoy sex with him.Bookmarked by sto7itz
07 Dec 2025
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Summary
“In the back of his mind Vox could hear something buzzing on his bedside table. His phone, probably work, but he ignored it. It could not be more urgent than this, nothing could actually.
“Your beloved phone is ringing.“ Yes, thanks for the info Alastor, he was well aware. Vox bit down on the back of his neck sharply before dragging his sparking tongue over the bite, making Alastor freeze up for a second.
“I’m busy.””
Even one of hell’s biggest overlords skipped out on work sometimes, though it would most likely end up backfiring in his face.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
05 Dec 2025
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A sharp burst of static escaped Alastor; he had meant it as a warning, but the radio hiss slid unexpectedly into a sultry saxophone riff.
Both froze.
Vox blinked, signal stuttering. “…the hell was that?”
“Ignore that.” Heat rose to his face as he tried to tug free, but Vox’s fingers only tightened, and Alastor felt the pulse in his own wrist jump against that unyielding grip.
A slow, delirious grin spread across his rival’s monitor. “…oh. My. God. You’re not sick. You’re horny.”or: Alastor gets food poisoning from eating a Lust imp; Vox helps him out
Bookmarked by sto7itz
08 Nov 2025
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Summary
Beaks are not the best for things involving body parts, Stolas is more than aware. He doesn't think too much of it until Blitz brings it up, to his mortification. As luck would have it, Blitz is feeling all too generous and decides to take it upon himself to teach Stolas a thing or two about blowjobs… With some precautionary measures, of course.
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Blitz finger fucks Stolas’ mouth until he knows what he’s doing.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
05 Oct 2025
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Stolas buys a new slutty robe to wear around the apartment and it drives Blitzø crazy.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
24 Sep 2025
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Stolas finds a fleshlight under the couch and things sure do happen!
Bookmarked by sto7itz
22 Sep 2025
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Stolas and Blitzø navigate a rising sense of sexual tension, both doing their best to move slowly. At least until Stolas catches Blitzø groaning in his sleep.
Or: a take on Stolitz's next "first" time. they christen the beanbag.
Series
- Part 5 of a love, a home
Bookmarked by sto7itz
15 Sep 2025
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Summary
For some reason Blitzo woke up in the middle of the night shamefully, disastrously horny.
Of course the gentlemanly thing to do would be to let Stolas sleep.
Obviously that's what he should do...
Bookmarked by sto7itz
25 Jul 2025
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Summary
"Donghyuck accidentally saw Mark masturbating..."
Bookmarked by sto7itz
04 Apr 2025
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Stolas’ Guide to Valentine’s Self Care by satanic_bipanic
Fandoms: Helluva Boss (Web Series)
03 Feb 2025
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Summary
On his first Valentine's Day since his fall from grace, Stolas decides to treat himself. Why not? He's making his own money now. A nice new robe, some candles, and an orgasm or two would do nicely.
Of course, Blitzø was SUPPOSED to be at work...
Written for HelluValentine Week. Day 1 Prompt: Lingerie/Dress Up/PJ's
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,346
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 59
- Kudos:
- 587
- Bookmarks:
- 122
- Hits:
- 4,850
Bookmarked by sto7itz
05 Feb 2025
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At Verosika’s Anti-Blitzø party, a very drunk and sassy Stolas has a little too much fun teasing Blitzø.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
10 Dec 2024
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Summary
The moment Stolas stepped through the portal from Verosika’s loud, bustling party and into Blitzø’s dark, silent apartment, a distant part of his alcohol-addled brain told him this was a very, very bad idea.
Bookmarked by sto7itz
18 Nov 2024