beth_any



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Boyle
    ooh i’m shaking
    like your legs could even carry you to my place to punch me in the dick at this point

    Nicky C
    For real
    Surely you must be on the floor after 2 straight days with Jane

    Cap
    Who the fuck do you think I am?
    I could do a week straight with Jane and still kick your ass

    3 months in the Ottawa Centaurs' group chat.

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    1/1
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    28 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Jane
    Are they both bad?
    Do you hate them?

    Ilya
    Have been having a mild breakdown, sorry
    You see, my boyfriend sent me two photos of himself wearing glasses when he knows that this makes me insane man

    Jane
    Oh come on
    You literally see me in them everyday!

    Ilya
    I do
    And I have had an orgasm every day for the last 421 days
    You see the connection, yes?

    Ilya does lots of boring things with Shane. They are his favourite things in the world.

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    27 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Who are you talking to?” Sveta is looking with a raised eyebrow, at Ilya’s delighted face.

    “Ah, I am talking to my catfish.”

    “What do you mean, your catfish?” Ilya angles the phone so Sveta can see the shirtless picture on the screen.

    “This guy is pretending to be Shane Hollander on Grindr. It’s pretty funny. He’s cropped the face out, but he’s using pictures from the billboard next to my apartment.”

    Or: Ilya Rozanov is sure he's being catfished- why would the real Shane Hollander be on Grindr, talking to random university of Ottawa students? But the more he talks to Wayne, the more he starts to like him, and the more he wishes Wayne would just come clean so they can finally be together.

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    27 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Bood
    what have you given her before?

    Ilya
    A fucking, mostly

    Bood
    CHEAP
    CHEAP GIFT GIVER

    Ilya enlists Bood & the Ottawa WAGs to help brainstorm ideas for his first proper Valentine’s Day with ‘Jane’.

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    26 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    "Oh." Hollander has gone a little red, beneath his freckles. "I am from… French Canada? Québec? Do you know? Very… very small town there, no English, only French. I try to learn, but— is a bit hard."

    Ilya feels mildly stupid. He knew, obviously, that they speak French in Canada, but he didn’t know it was, like— some people’s only language. He’d sort of assumed everyone was fluent in both.

    "Huh. Cool."

    "Your English is very good," Hollander offers.

    Ilya laughs.

    "I mean, yeah— I grew up in Minneapolis."

    -

    aka. the one where the language barrier is reversed. it changes everything.

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    25 Jun 2026