Work Text:
“Tell me your story,” Buck asks, once they’re all settled in his office-slash-living room. It’s become his go-to ice-breaker for new clients—how could he expect to plan their wedding if he doesn’t know who they are as a couple? Sure, he’s a romantic, but it’s also practical. It’s how he learns how to turn the big day from great into something magical. He sips his coffee, leaving his notepad in his bag for now. He wants this to be as natural as possible, and he can jot down his notes later.
Ana, the bride-to-be, smiles brightly, linking her fiancé’s hand with her own. “We met about three years ago. I was his son’s teacher.”
“She’s amazing with him,” the fiancé, Eddie, cuts in. He’s incredibly handsome, with his brown eyes and long lashes, perfect smile, and hair combed to the side. They make a beautiful couple.
Ana swats at his knee with her free hand. “He’s leaving out a lot. He didn’t like me at first. Thought I was the opposite of that, actually.”
“I was a bit overprotective.” Eddie’s smiles, still beautiful, but a little tighter. “But we crossed paths again, and here we are.” He raises their joint hands and kisses the back of hers, an apology for a years old crime. It’s sweet, Buck thinks.
“Here we are,” Ana repeats, her eyes only for Eddie. Buck uses the opportunity to finally fish out his notepad.
“That’s so lovely,” he says, scribbling Flores-Diaz Wedding at the top of his page. “So, let’s talk about the wedding now. What do you want for your big day?”
Ana launches into a long list of ideas, pulling out her phone with her Pinterest board already open. She’s clearly put a lot of thought into the wedding already, which is great for Buck. She’s worked out a budget (Eddie’s eyes went wide at, in Buck’s opinion, the modest, realistic number, but he doesn’t protest), has an estimated guest list, and thoughts on venues (Eddie chimed in to add, “No churches this time,” with no other thoughts. Ana laughed, squeezing his hand, and explained to Buck, “Neither of us are religious, so it’s probably best, even if both our families would prefer it.”
While Ana has ideas and thoughts galore, Eddie, on the other hand, is mostly quiet. Even when Buck tried to include him by asking his opinion, he deflects with "I'm happy with whatever Ana wants" with a smile plastered on his face.
Buck tries again, once they get towards the end of their meeting. “I feel like we’re leaving you out of this. Do you have anything you want to add? Any ideas, or must-haves?”
“I’ve already had a wedding before, so this one’s all for her,” Eddie says, clearly trying for a joke. It doesn’t land, but Buck chuckles politely, and Ana squeezes his arm, looking up at him sweetly. He seems like a bit of a stiff, in Buck’s opinion, but he's hot, and she's clearly charmed.
He’s planned around far worse than that. He breathes through his nose, gearing up for one last try. “Okay, but there must be one thing that you want. Please," he says, not exactly proud of pulling out a pout, but applying a little bit of guilt can get results. “I’d feel like I wasn’t doing my job if I didn’t get one thing from you today.”
Ana nudges him, rubbing a comforting hand over his forearm. “Come on, Eddie. It’s our wedding, not just mine.”
Eddie huffs, rolling his eyes. “Fine, there is one thing.” Buck does not pump his fist, but he thinks it very hard. “My son is going to be my best man.”
“That’s so sweet,” Buck says, no exaggeration necessary. It is sweet. “I love kids.”
“I love this one.” Eddie’s eyes light up, just talking about him. “He’s my whole world. He’s twelve now, and I want to make sure he’s part of this.”
“We’re just worried it might be too much for him,” Ana adds with a gentle smile.
Eddie shakes his head. “You're worried. I’m not.”
“Christopher has CP,” Ana explains for Buck.
Eddie smiles, but looks tense, and Buck can tell this isn't the first time they’ve had this conversation. “I don't need him to do a speech, and obviously I’m not expecting him to do the whole bachelor party thing. I just want him next to me. He’s the most important person in my life.”
Ana frowns momentarily, before her face smooths out like it was never there. She reaches for Eddie’s hand, squeezing it.
“And we will make sure that happens,” Buck insists to Eddie. “We will look at accessible venues, and any other accommodation he needs I will get for you.”
Something complicated passes over Eddie’s face, before settling into another smile. He relaxes back into the couch, tension gone. “Thank you,” he says, in a way that reverberates through Buck.
They wrap up shortly after that, with Buck feeling optimistic, like he’s passed one small test at least. Buck promises to send them both some personalized options over the next few days, and they can meet again for tours of some venues, then waves them out the door, and powers up his laptop to get to work.
He’s finished polishing up his notes from the meeting when he hears his door unlock, followed by his sister walking through.
By way of greeting, she says, “Hey! Work’s over! The Bachelorette starts in ten minutes, go get your corkscrew!” Maddie deposits the bottle of wine on the table, right in front of Buck’s laptop to make her point clear.
He rolls his eyes, grabbing the bottle and heading to the kitchen, while Maddie gets comfortable on the couch.
After the episode, swirling her third glass of wine, Maddie nods to his abandoned laptop, left closed on the dining table. “How are the new clients? You met them today, right?”
“Yeah,” Buck says, nodding. “They’re, like, picture perfect. A school teacher and a firefighter, both fucking beautiful. They look like they stepped out of a commercial or something. You can’t get more ideal than that.”
“Mm, so you won’t have trouble finding a photographer, at least.”
Buck laughs. “They seem really nice too. I mean, he didn’t really talk much, but she was really excited, was showing off her Pinterest boards, and everything, but not in a scary way. I think they’ll be pretty chill to work with.”
“Which is needed after that last one.”
“Oh my God, don’t remind me,” Buck groans. He drains the last of his wine, trying to wash away the memory of seating charts from hell, and live dove-releases, and screaming matches that set off the noise warning on his watch.
This one has to be better, if only because the bar could not be any lower.
Maddie snorts, bringing him back to the present. “So dramatic.”
“I think it comes naturally with the line of work,” Buck jokes.
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Maddie tops up Buck’s empty glass, grinning. “Okay, come on, no let’s get to the real dirt.”
“You have to stop asking me this.”
“And yet, you always answer!” Buck huffs at that, but he can’t deny it. “So, how long will Mr. and Mrs. Perfect last?”
Buck sighs, long and drawn out, before finally answering: “Five years. Maybe.”
Maddie dramatically gasps, faux shock on her face. “You don’t believe in their love?”
Buck laughs, shaking his head. Maybe he’s getting cynical. When he started this gig that turned into his career, he thought, if anything, it would make him more of a romantic. He’s planning the best, most-perfect day for these couples, the culmination of their love. If anything though, it has just given him a better bullshit detector, and more realistic views. “There were some disagreements. Nothing huge, but it was something. Plus…” He swirls his glass of wine, thinking back to Eddie, and his perfect, insincere smile. “I don’t know. The groom seemed disinterested. Or detached? Which, yes, is the cliche for a reason, but it was different.”
“How?”
Buck sighs. “I don’t know, it was… like he was clocking in for work, counting down the seconds until it was over. Just didn’t seem like a great sign to me.”
“Well, time will tell, I guess,” Maddie says, a sign that she’s ready to move on to the next topic. Buck knows she’s right though, there’s no use dwelling on their potential lack-of-future after one meeting. All he can do is plan the best wedding he can for now, and then in a few years, if he keeps up with them, he can find out if he’s right.
*
Buck is in regular correspondence with Ana Flores pretty much immediately. Buck appreciates that she's put a lot of thought into the planning. He's dealt with some clients that are more hands off, and it tends to make more work for Buck in the end, chasing them down for approvals.
Ana and he end up meeting weekly, sometimes more, to dive into the planning. The date of the wedding isn’t finalized yet, but she’s hoping for the fall, which gives them just under a year—a perfect schedule for Buck, who’s just had a run of under six-months weddings that always feel like a pressure cooker right from the start.
There’s none of that with the Flores-Diaz wedding, though, which is refreshing. There’s time to plan things properly, without any rush. Buck has booked tours of multiple venues for Ana, a plethora for her and Eddie to choose from.
Ana already has most of the guest list and the color palettes sorted. Her cousin is a musician, and will be covering the music for the big night (“I think I would be shunned from my family if I went with someone else,” Ana joked). Buck has provided her lists of wedding photographers, and started booking meetings with caterers.
Throughout it all, it’s only Ana he sees and hears from. Eddie has turned into the invisible groom, one that Buck only knows exists from the first meeting and from the other side of Ana’s texts and phone calls.
Ana takes countless photos of venues and makes a point to tell Buck she’s sending them to Eddie, and reports back the opinions he’s had: He loved the garden—with the willow trees—at the last place we saw, and, he really likes the high ceilings, or, Eddie wasn’t a fan of the layout—too many stairs.
Buck honestly can’t tell how many of those actually came from Eddie, but he nods along, and takes the feedback for each.
Today, Buck is meeting Ana at a quaint vineyard in Malibu. They’ve already been out here once before, a few weeks back, but Ana wanted a second look. It had been at the top of her list for a while now.
Buck arrived thirty minutes early, to speak with the owners and ask some logistical questions of his own. Buck had been satisfied with their answers, and has been waiting for Ana outside, under the warm spring sun. There’s not a cloud in the sky, which Buck likes to take as a good sign. Ana pulls up, right on schedule, and she gets out of the car, alone as usual.
Buck guides her around the property once more, going into more detail this time, discussing price points, and date availability. It all fits with what Ana wants, and she seems even more pleased upon a second viewing.
There’s a lull in the conversation when Buck asks, “Eddie working again today?” Maybe he shouldn’t have at all, and just let it go. As soon as it leaves his mouth he regrets it, seeing Ana’s careful smile break just for a second before it’s back.
“No, but he just got off a shift last night. He’s resting today.”
“Of course.” Buck nods, reassuring. He feels like a dick.
She runs a hand through her hair, brow creased. “You know, he told me he was happy with whatever I wanted. And that’s a nice thing to do, right?”
“It is.”
“He’s just… I guess he’s not interested in the details. But he still cares.” She looks up at Buck, mouth twisted. “Do I sound like an idiot, trying to convince myself of something I shouldn’t?”
“No,” Buck insists, immediately, even though he doesn’t quite believe it. That’s not his place though. “No. Absolutely not. A lot of guys aren’t into this stuff. I’m the weirdo, there. And you’re right, it’s great he’s giving you the reins. He trusts you.”
“Yeah.” Ana smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. She sighs, then sits up straighter, letting her concerns fall away with ease. Watching it is almost impressive. “Okay, what’s next?”
Ana ends up booking the venue later that day.
She doesn’t check in one last time with Eddie before signing the papers and paying the deposit. Buck wonders if that’s on purpose, or if she had already okayed it with him. Maybe it’s a mix of both. He doesn’t make the mistake of asking. Their relationship surviving until their October 28th wedding date is a problem for Future Buck. For now, he orders two glasses of sparkling wine for them to celebrate.
*
Just when Buck was starting to convince himself he won’t be seeing Eddie until the wedding, he appears. Buck had been waiting for Ana, already seated at a booth in the small restaurant—one of the catering options Buck had put together for her—when she walked through the door with Eddie trailing behind, hands interlocked.
They don’t notice him at first, and Buck uses that as an excuse to watch them together—to watch Eddie especially. He’s just as handsome as he was when they first met three months ago, but he looks tired. He has dark circles under his eyes, and his shoulders slumped. He turns his head, scanning the restaurant, and suddenly he’s staring right at Buck. He looks startled by it, like he wasn’t expecting Buck to be looking right back at him—why would he? It is a little weird, Buck realizes. But the corners of Eddie’s lips lift, and he gives Buck a little two-fingered wave. He nudges Ana, taking the lead and walks them over to Buck.
“Decided to show up for the fun one, huh?” Buck teases once they’re sitting in the booth across from him.
Ana laughs, politely, running a hand up and down her fiancé’s arm. “Eddie’s taking a bit of time off work,” she says. “It’s actually great timing for all of this. He can help out when I’m not available.”
“That’s great.”
“Yeah,” Eddie says, slouching in his seat. He smiles tightly, looking just beyond Buck. “It’s worked out perfectly.”
Despite Eddie being present, the rest of the meeting is much like the others: as if Eddie isn’t there at all. He recedes into the background, only eating the food quietly, offering up one-word responses when prompted by Ana. He’s not outright rude, just… disinterested, clearly something else on his mind.
Even with the weddings he’s planned before where the groom-to-be isn’t as involved, they still seemed happy and in love. Eddie is like a blank slate. He says the right things, he smiles and looks into her eyes, but it’s vacant.
Has wedding planning just made him judgmental and cynical, Buck wonders, staring at Eddie’s beautiful but empty face. Maybe Eddie expresses himself more quietly than Buck does, maybe his face is just like that. But then, Ana says something about Christopher and he instantly changes, lighting up and looking happy for the first time all day.
That’s love, Buck thinks. He doesn’t see that when Eddie’s looking at Ana. It nags at Buck the rest of the meeting, that it’s a bad sign, that this marriage is probably doomed. But only planning weddings for couples he thinks will stay together doesn’t pay the bills.
They work their way through the tasting menu, with Ana impressively taking notes on each plate. Eddie eats every last bite, but when Buck asks him his thoughts, all he gets is a bland, it’s good. It’ll end up being Ana’s choice once again, Buck thinks. When they finish, Ana sends Buck a copy of the notes she took, so he’ll have something to go off of. She liked this place a lot, but wants to see more before rushing into a decision.
Buck nods, agreeing. “That’s a great mindset. And I’ve already booked us at the next place, Marigold Catering for Wednesday, so I’ll see you then?”
Ana winces. “I actually have an after school meeting that day. But Eddie can meet you, right?” She directed the last part at Eddie, smiling up to him, a small pout on her face.
“Of course,” he says, face tilting down, as if he might kiss her, but stopping at a smile instead. It’s only then that Buck realizes he’s never seen them kiss, not even a chaste peck. The absence suddenly feels glaring, despite it being a perfectly sweet moment. Maybe they’re just not into PDA.
“Great,” Buck says, clapping his hands together.
“Cool.” Eddie nods. “So just text me the details—”
“Ah, you know what? I don’t think I have your number, just Ana’s. Hold on.” Buck fishes his phone out of his back pocket. He pulls up a new contact, holding his phone out to Eddie.
Eddie hands it back to him once he’s added himself. Now he’s a real person in Buck’s life and phone, no longer Ana’s absent fiancé—in more ways than one, Buck hopes. He sends Eddie the address as soon as he gets home, and hopes for the best.
*
Buck is, annoyingly, running late for his meeting with Eddie. His last one went long—the bride had a falling out with her bridesmaid three weeks ahead of the wedding, and requires a change in the guest list, and rework of the seating chart—but Buck really doesn’t want to think about that anymore until he’s at home with a beer in hand.
He parks his car in a rush, more frazzled than he’d like. He’s not sure what to expect from this one-on-one with Eddie, but keeping him waiting probably isn’t the best start. When Buck rounds the corner to the front of the restaurant, Eddie's already there, scrolling through his phone under the shaded entryway.
Buck waves, catching his attention. “Hey! Sorry I’m late. My morning meeting went long, and then there was traffic on my way over—”
Eddie pockets his phone. “It’s fine, Buck,” he says, smiling. It really is a gorgeous smile, Buck muses. In that moment, he completely understands Ana waving off all of his absences. One look at him and everything would just wash away. It’s dangerous, actually.
Buck shakes himself out of it. “Let’s head in, we don’t wanna lose the reservation.”
The food is good but probably not what they’ll end up with for the wedding—the sauces, while delicious, Buck can already tell would be a hazard for fancy dresses and suits. Eddie and him have a great time though. In fact, the more they talked, the more Eddie seemed to relax and enjoy himself. Maybe the food and the wine pairings helped, but Buck likes to think it was mostly the good conversation.
It felt like they talked about everything but the wedding: workout routines, Eddie's pick up basketball games, his son. Buck politely declined the basketball invitation, but he cooed when Eddie showed off pictures of his son, and encouraged Eddie to share some stories. And best of all, Eddie laughed at all of Buck’s jokes, throwing his head back like he genuinely thought Buck was funny.
“Thank you for coming out today,” Buck says as they walk towards the parking lot, full from the endless sample dishes. “You know, I was starting to worry you were avoiding me,” he jokes.
“No,” Eddie laughs, “Definitely not you.”
*
Ana isn’t able to make the next meeting either, something that Buck learned via text from Eddie earlier this morning. That’s been new—texting with Eddie. After getting home last time, Buck had sent Eddie a few extra notes he had about the tasting menu, and then, for some reason, had been compelled to make another quip about the decor, something Eddie had commented on during their meal.
The fluttering in Buck’s chest at the three laughing emoji reply from Eddie was clearly an outsized response. He told himself it was just a sense of accomplishment, finally breaking through to Eddie and making a connection.
They had kept texting after that, usually nothing wedding related, but instead like they were friends. They talked about their days, Eddie sharing his journey of learning to cook, and Buck venting about his other clients. Buck shared his favorite protein shake recipe, and Eddie sent a picture of Christopher’s science project he helped with.
So when Eddie said it would just be him again, Buck felt almost guilty that his first reaction was excitement.
It’s not even something Ana needs to be here for, Buck tells himself. They’re only setting up an in-store registry. Ana and Buck have already started a more expansive online version, but Ana had mentioned some of their family doesn’t ‘trust online shopping,’ so they’re covering all their bases.
“Eddie!” Buck calls once he spots him walking through the parking lot. Maybe it was a little too loud, but Eddie beams at him.
“Buck,” he shouts just as loudly as he walks over.
Buck opens the door for Eddie, stretching his arm out to gesture for Eddie to go through. “Wow, a gentleman,” Eddie teases as he heads inside. Buck can’t say that he doesn't enjoy the view as he follows.
With most of Buck’s clients, the conversations they have rarely stray from the wedding. It always feels like work, even if the work is fun. With Eddie, it’s just like hanging out with a friend who happens to be getting married. Much like their first solo meeting, the wedding talk is rare, only coming up when Eddie finds a new item to scan. It’s refreshing, something Buck didn’t know he was looking for.
“We’ve already got something similar on the online registry,” Buck notes at the blender Eddie points to. Eddie scrunches up his nose at the mention. “What? Did you not like the blender Ana picked out?”
“Yeah, I’m a total blender snob,” Eddie deadpans. “No, I just don’t get the whole online thing.”
Buck blinks. “Sorry, the whole online thing? Come again? Are you the reason we’re doing this in person, and not some eighty year-old uncle?”
Eddie rolls his eyes. “Online shopping is a scam.”
“I—” Buck shakes his head, trying to hold back his laughter. “I don’t even know what to say to that.” He turns and walks down the next aisle, leaving Eddie behind.
By the time they finish with the outdoor section (“We need some barbecue stuff,” Eddie had said before spending the entire time looking at bird feeders.) Buck has heard all about Eddie’s journey to LA and becoming a firefighter. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that Eddie would turn the questions back over to Buck: “How the hell did you get into this line of work?”
Buck tries to wave him off. “Can’t I just say I always had a passion for it?”
“Absolutely not. You look like you should be running a gym, not a wedding,” Eddie says, pointing at Buck’s arms. “I know there’s a story there.”
“It’s embarrassing,” Buck groans.
Eddie flashes him a toothy grin. “Well, now you really have to tell me.”
“Fine,” Buck huffs, caving immediately. “When I was younger and dumber, I used to, you know, crash a lot of weddings.”
Eddie snorts. “There is no way that’s how—”
“When you go to a couple dozen, you start noticing a few things. Things that came in handy when Sue, my old boss, caught me one night, and instead of rightfully kicking me out, I was able to charm her with my skills. And then I just kinda fell into it. I don’t know, I'm weirdly really good at it?”
“Yeah, well, you wield a mean clipboard. It’s scary.”
“Please,” Buck scoffs, leering at Eddie. “I’ve seen you staring. Scary is not the word you’re looking for—” Buck cuts himself off as reality hits him like a bucket of cold water. He doesn’t know what came over him, forgetting himself like that. Flirting, with his client, who he’s planning a wedding for. It’s completely inappropriate and a sure fire way to lose this job and—
Eddie’s cheeks are pink, staring at Buck with—with something in his eyes. “Maybe it is the wrong word,” he says before clearing his throat and turning away.
Buck forces out a laugh. What the fuck, he thinks. He imagines his brain like a fork in a microwave, sparking and smoking, spinning round and round. Buck had crossed a line. Eddie wasn’t supposed to stumble over it with him, clumsy and unsure.
Actually, It’s—it’s fine. That wasn’t even flirting, Buck rationalizes. There was no intention behind it. Eddie probably doesn’t even know what it sounded like, and the longer Buck lets this moment linger, the more time it gives Eddie to figure that out. Buck scrambles to fill the silence, and change the topic.
“So, uh, when did you decide to propose? What was your moment?” This was a great idea, actually. It’s safe, and a reminder of what they’re here for—in fact, Buck wonders if telling the story could even be a good for Eddie. Light the spark again, or something.
Eddie blows out the air in his cheeks. “I don’t know, it’s not much of a story. It was just time, you know? She’s been hinting a little bit, subtly. And my mom and my tía had been hinting a lot. The exact opposite of subtle from them. And I mean, they were right. Ana’s great, really great. Chris loves her. So I went out and bought a ring, and yeah. That was it.”
“Oh.” Buck falters, trying to keep the disappointment out from his tone. That’s not at all what he was hoping for, and not much for him to work with. He powers through with a smile. “That’s great. Yeah, when you know it’s time, you know.”
“Yeah.” Eddie turns away, clearing his throat. “Guess it’s not very romantic.”
“Doesn’t have to be. As long as you’re happy, and doing what’s right for—for you both. And, uh, it must be nice, having the time off work for this.”
Eddie falters in his steps. “Yeah, it, um, it wasn’t exactly my choice.” He comes to a stop, finally looking back at Buck. He sighs, running a hand through his hair, knocking loose a strand that curls over his forehead. “My captain caught me having a panic attack on duty.”
“Shit.” Buck wasn’t expecting that—both the honesty, and the admission itself. “Are you okay?”
Eddie’s eyes widen, a brief smile tugs at his lips. “Yeah, I’m—I’m okay. But I’m off duty until I get cleared for a mental health evaluation. I have this mandatory therapy thing. I don’t know, it sucks.”
“Yeah, shit. I bet. I mean, I’m, uh, glad they have those safeguards for you guys. And that—that they care about that stuff? Your line of work must be crazy stressful. It’s good that they’re watching out for you.”
“Yeah, except…” Eddie pauses, gnawing at his lip. When he looks back up at Buck, eyes big and shining, he looks nervous. “I don’t think it was because of work. Honestly, it’s…it was right after a call with Ana. About the wedding.”
“Oh,” Buck says, brain still catching up.
Eddie scratches at his nose, looking away. “And it wasn’t really the first time. Just… the first time it happened at work.”
“Oh!’ Buck says again, stuck on repeat. “That’s…Weddings are stressful. That’s normal,” he reassures, trying to keep his voice level. He’s not completely lying. He’s talked down a few of his clients before. Cold feet is a cliché for a reason, it’s a huge, legally-binding change. He’s never had to deal with that this early in the process though, and certainly never to a had-to-take-leave-from-work extent. But he’s sure that’s not abnormal.
“Yeah, exactly,” Eddie says, sounding a little distant, but maybe that’s just Buck still stuck an aisle back. Eddie clears his throat. “That’s what I’ve been saying. I just gotta keep pushing through.”
*
“God,” Buck groans, throwing himself face down into Maddie’s couch. “This is a disaster.”
Buck feels the couch sink down, then Maddie’s hand rubbing his back. “Are they somehow worse than the last couple?”
“I don’t think he wants to marry her.”
“Oh, God. Really?”
Buck hums, squeezing his eyes shut tight, and pressing further into the fabric. He’s being dramatic, but he’s not ready to sit up and face the world yet. This couch is safe and uncomplicated and would never derail a wedding he’s spending the better part of a year planning. Buck’s never leaving it. “He’s having panic attacks.”
“About the wedding?”
“Mhmm.”
Buck breathes into the couch, the silence stretching on. Maybe Maddie doesn’t have anything to say, he thinks, there’s nothing she can do about it anyways, he was just venting. Eventually, she does respond though. “It could just be pre-wedding jitters, you know? You might be making it out to be worse than it is.”
Buck turns his head finally, his eyes adjusting to the light, as he looks over at the TV showing the weather forecast for the weekend. “I don't know, it feels like more than that.”
“Well, what do you want to do then?”
“I don't know… keep planning until they call it off, I guess?”
Maddie snorts. “Really?”
“I don't know, I’m just venting. I guess it’s not actually that different from other couples I’ve had before, ones I was pretty sure would never last, it’s just…”
“What?”
“Eddie’s great. I like him. And this wedding seems like it’s ruining his life? And I just… don't want to be contributing to that.”
Maddie hums. Buck turns to look at her, to gauge what she’s thinking, and she’s staring right back at him, with a scrutinizing look.
“I just thought you would be more concerned about the bride that might be getting left at the altar.”
“I—” Buck frowns. “Of course I am. Ana, the bride, she’s—of course she’s great, and I don’t want her to get hurt. And I feel awful for her.”
“But it’s Eddie that you’re more worried about. Didn’t you say you barely talked to Eddie before last week?”
“It’s been a few weeks,” Buck protests, weakly. Maddie looks at him, amused, and he feels himself get flustered. “I have sympathy for both of them in this oncoming disaster, okay?”
“Wow. You totally have a man-crush. And it’s making you a little dramatic.”
Buck sits up so fast he gets a head rush. “Um, no. No, no, no.”
Maddie says nothing, just raises an eyebrow, and takes a long sip from her coffee.
“Sure, I’ve checked him out. He has a great ass—sue me. But that’s not what this is.”
“Okay,” Maddie says, smiling, absolutely not believing him.
“It’s not!”
“Okay,” she repeats, with a laugh, hands raised in defeat. “Look, maybe you’re right, and it’s all a disaster in the making. But maybe, just maybe, there’s a tiny part of you that wants to find the bad signs? Weddings are stressful, I mean look at mine.”
“I don’t think Eddie has encephalitis.”
Maddie rolls her eyes. “Fine, maybe if this goes as badly as you want it to, my wedding won’t be the worst you’ve ever planned then.”
“I don’t want it to be bad,” Buck groans. “I just want them to be happy.”
“And maybe,” Maddie says, playfully throwing an arm around Buck’s shoulder, “Your beautiful wedding plans will fix all their problems and give them that.”
“Yeah,” Buck huffs, not feeling very convinced, “Maybe.”
*
Buck worries that seeing Eddie again might be awkward. Instead, he walks up to Buck’s house with a smile on his face, and carrying himself with an ease that Buck hasn’t seen fully before. He has almost a glow about him. Buck wonders if this is how Eddie looked when Ana first met him.
Maybe, Buck wonders, his concerns were overblown. Maybe Eddie just needed to get it off his chest, and now he can move forward. Buck holds onto that optimism throughout their meeting. Eddie had come over to finalize some of the boring stuff—booking hotels and transportation for the wedding party. It’s the sort of thing Buck had thought would be a safe bet for Eddie, not overly romantic—just practical. But even when it comes to booking the honeymoon suite, Eddie stays relaxed, laughing along with Buck when they get to the special requests section. “I need the rose petal heart on the bed, obviously.”
Buck snorts. “Obviously.”
When everything is done, instead of leaving, Eddie asks, a little shyly, “Do you wanna get a beer?”
Buck grabs two from his fridge, and they end up sitting in his backyard, drinking them as they talk under the afternoon sun. “I miss this,” Eddie says, “Some good-old fashion guy time. Feels like I haven’t had the chance since the engagement.”
Buck heartily agrees. He doesn’t mention that most of his own guy-time has recently morphed into watching The Bachelor with his sister. Sometimes Chimney is there too, at least. “We can do this whenever you need,” Buck says, clinking his beer against Eddie’s. Maybe this is all he needed.
*
The next time Buck sees Eddie, it’s with Ana again. He’s not proud of himself, but he watches them together extra closely, looking for any sign of whether they’re doomed or not. They both smile easily, and hold each others hands as they walk around like any happy couple would. But it still feels so surface level to Buck. And worse, after establishing a friendly routine with Eddie the past few weeks, it’s like he’s back at square one again. Ana and Buck hold up most of the conversation again, while Eddie seems to shrink into the background. Buck watches how tightly he holds himself, his shoulders tense, and his fists clenched at his side.
They’re viewing a venue for the rehearsal dinner, a restaurant the vineyard had recommended, only a short distance away. They end up booking it on the spot, Ana falling in love with it, and Eddie being agreeable, at most.
“You doing okay?” Buck asks when Ana is swept away by the owner, to show her the patio.
“Hm?” Eddie looks up, almost startled. “I’m fine.”
“Good. You looked a little…” Buck doesn’t know how to say, I’m worried you’re about to have a panic attack, without coming across like a jackass.
“Just got a little overwhelmed. I’m good, Buck.”
“Okay. Just, uh, thought I should check in.”
Eddie rolls his eyes, but smiles, knocking his shoulder into Buck’s. “I’m not made of glass, you know.”
Buck breathes out a laugh, nudging Eddie right back. “Sorry.”
“Hey, we’re good. Um, I think it actually helped. Talking to someone about it—someone who isn’t taking notes and getting paid to evaluate my mental health.”
“Good.” Buck smiles, ducking his head. He’s glad he could help, even if he was just a listening ear. “Have you told Ana?”
“Uh,” Eddie scratching the side of his nose, looking away. “I just don’t wanna worry her, you know?”
“Oh. Right, sure.” Buck nods, the previous relief he was starting he feel seeping away. Buck opens his mouth to say something, maybe: you should probably tell her, but Eddie beats him to it.
“Oh, by the way, I tried that weird ice cream thing you we’re talking about—with the olive oil. It actually wasn’t bad.”
“Oh my God, right? It’s good! It has no right to be, like, I thought it was just going to be one of those stupid TikTok trends, but it’s actually good!” Buck should be embarrassed at how easily he lets Eddie get away with his deflection, but he's too excited about Eddie trying something he told him about to care.
Eddie laughs. “Okay, let’s not go too crazy. I think I said it wasn’t bad.”
“You loved it, I can tell,” Buck says, beaming. “Did you add the sea salt? That’s important! It takes it to a whole new level.”
Eddie scrunches up his nose. It’s cute. “I added table salt.”
“Eddie, no,” he whines, drawing the word out. Eddie’s just watching Buck, shaking his head, amused. “Tonight you have to do it again, the right way. I swear, it’s so—”
“Wow,” Ana says, appearing from seemingly out of nowhere. “You two are getting along well.” She wraps an arm around Eddie’s waist, leaning into his side.
Buck steps back, not sure when he got so close. He forces out a laugh, suddenly feeling awkward.
“Buck’s great,” Eddie says simply. He put his own arm over her shoulders, belatedly reciprocating.
“Well, that's why I hired him. He came highly recommended.”
“I don’t doubt it.” Eddie smiles, and it’s back to that store-bought look. “You’re all done? That was fast.”
Ana chuckles, pressing in even closer to Eddie. “I was gone for almost ten minutes, babe. He took me on a tour of the garden. But, yeah, all done. We can go home.” She turns to Buck. “Oh, I looked through the portfolio of the photographer you sent, the one you said you had worked with before. Taylor…”
“Kelly,” he supplies for her, still trying to shake off the weird not-guilt feeling.
“Yes! She seems great. Would we be able to set up a meeting?”
“Absolutely,” Buck says, pulling out his phone, happy to have something to do with his hands. She texts back, immediately, prompt as ever. “She can do next Friday if that works for you? Also, because I’ve worked with her before, she is willing to offer a little mini shoot that day—give you guys a better idea of her work.”
Ana looks thrilled at the concept, while Eddie’s smile remains fixed. Buck sends Taylor a thumbs up.
*
“Eddie, put your hand on her waist, and stand a little closer. You’re getting married, for God’s sake.”
Taylor, as always, knows exactly what she wants for each shot. Buck watches the scene play out from behind her, as Eddie’s hand rests stiffly on the small of Ana’s back, staring down at her with an approximation of love on his face.
They look beautiful, of course—Ana in a pretty floral sundress, and Eddie in a white linen button down. The sun is setting behind them over the pond. The light makes Eddie’s shirt almost translucent. They’re a picture perfect couple, just like Buck had thought when they first met months ago.
“Perfect,” Taylor says, and continues to snap photos as they break from the pose. She’s always preferred candids—they’re more truthful—but she knows what people want for wedding and engagement photos.
“Okay, I want to do a few proposal shots. Buck,” she says, without turning to him, “can you bring Eddie the ring box?”
Buck runs in quickly to hand it off, but once he’s standing in front of Eddie, he can’t waste the opportunity kneeling down in the grass and doing a little flourish to open the box. Eddie rolls his eyes fondly, as Ana laughs like it’s the best thing she’s seen in a while.
Eddie takes it from Buck, his warm fingers grazing Buck’s hand. He feels a little lightheaded when he stands and runs back to Taylor. He probably didn’t eat enough this morning.
They finish quickly after that, with Taylor promising to send the photos in a few days, along with her quote for the wedding. Ana seems very pleased with everything, already talking over the wedding plans with Taylor.
Eddie hangs back as they talk. He runs a hand through his hair, like he’s trying to purposefully mess it up now that the photo shoot is over. He looks frustrated when the artful single strand of hair falls back to his forehead.
When Buck sees he’s about to try again, he walks over, like he’s being pulled in. “Hey, stop it.” He knocks Eddie’s hand away. “You look good.”
Eddie rolls his eyes, blushing. Buck’s pretty sure none of Taylor’s pictures will hold a candle to this view.
*
“That one’s good,” Buck says, leaning in to look at the photo on Taylor’s laptop. She’s already started her editing, even though they’re still in bed, and mostly undressed. Buck doesn’t understand it, personally, but Taylor believes she does her best work after an orgasm. It clears my head. Thanks for the help, Buckley, she had said, when they were working their first wedding together two years ago.
“Of course it’s good. It’s mine.”
Buck laughs softly, falling back into his pillow. No one could ever say Taylor lacked self-esteem. “Well, I brought you a pretty good couple too.”
“Yes, they’re hot. You brought me a very photogenic couple,” Taylor adjusts the coloring on the photo once more, and saves. “You know as well as I do that that’s not even half the battle. These two are very pretty, but they were stiff, and worst of all, boring.”
“Hey,” Buck frowns. “They’re not boring. Eddie is really funny, actually. He’s—”
Taylor snorts. “Cute. You have a crush.’
Buck groans, sitting up. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”
“Hot guy with an ass. Ugh, you are completely predictable. Plus, you get that stupid look on your face when you talk about him.”
“Whatever,” Buck huffs. He doesn’t have any look on his face, stupid or otherwise.
*
“You’re gonna love this place,” Buck says as they walk up to the large building. It took them an hour’s drive out of the city to get here, to the large farm-like property. There’s a rusted old car by the entrance; an art piece, with flowers busting from it every-which-way, a preview of what’s to come inside.
“You know me, I’m a real botanical guy,” Eddie deadpans.
“You mock me, but I’ve been eyeing this place for months. I haven’t brought any clients here yet, and I’m christening it with you, so you better appreciate it.” Buck opens the large wooden door with a flourish, holding it for Eddie.
Eddie rolls his eyes, but there’s a faint blush on his cheeks that warms Buck up inside. Buck smiles to himself, following Eddie inside. While Eddie has already drifted over to a wall with a large living moss display, Buck makes his way to the counter to check in. Buck is told the florist, Heather, is running a little behind and will meet them by the orchid display in twenty minutes. Until then they’re free to explore.
Buck does just that, heading over to Eddie, who is now poking at a small succulent. “See something you like?” he asks, sidling up to Eddie.
He startles, then shakes his head when he realizes it’s just Buck. “No,” he says, pulling his hand back from the plant. “I couldn’t keep a plant alive to save my life.”
Buck snorts. “That can’t be true.”
“Well, it is. I have a black thumb.” He turns to Buck, grinning. “You regretting bringing me here now?”
“If you curse this place with your black thumb, I will.”
Eddie rolls his eyes, again. Maybe Buck should be insulted he’s earned two in such a short amount of time, but he feels a little mesmerized instead. There’s something artful about the way he does it; his big, brown eyes shining even more than usual.
Buck shakes himself out of it, realizing Eddie’s already moved on to the next display, walking through an archway covered in string lights. Buck happily follows Eddie around the store. They pass a waterfall, a table full of potted sunflowers, and more art pieces—one has living plants growing through an old piano, bursting out of the top, and between the missing keys—until they find their way to the orchids with time to spare.
“Hey, did you like the engagement photos?”
“Hm?” He’s checking the price on one of the orchids. His eyes widen, dropping the tag immediately.
“The photo shoot. I know Taylor finished editing, she emailed me a couple.” She always does, in case Buck needs any images for the invitations, the registry or anything else that comes up. What she doesn’t normally do is text a separate photo to him. It was one of the candids she took while Buck ran up with the ring box. He was blurry, only the back of his head in the frame, but Eddie—he was facing the camera while he beamed at Buck, his whole face lit up. Maybe you can fuck the groom after all, read her text underneath, along with a winking emoji. Buck hadn’t dignified it with a response, but he had, for reasons unknown, saved the picture to his phone.
“Oh, I think she sent those to Ana. She loved them,” Eddie says, bringing Buck back to the present.
“What about you?” Eddie looked beautiful in every single one Buck saw, not that that was ever a concern.
“Yeah, they were fine. I mean, great. They were great.” That’s probably one of the least convincing things Buck’s ever heard. Buck is about to say as much, when a loud hello! is directed towards them.
A middle-aged woman with thick green glasses walks towards them. Her earrings, bright red, dangle below her ears. Buck squints at them, pretty sure they're roses. It's a nice touch. “I’m Heather, you must be here for the Diaz wedding.” She shakes both of their hands, and then brings them into her workshop to show off her flower arrangement options.
They really are beautiful arrangements, which Buck gushes over, while asking all the logistics questions he needs to. Eddie trails behind for the most part, which is why it takes Buck a moment to realize Eddie had stopped in front of one of the bouquets. “Found one you like?” Buck asks, walking over.
Eddie smiles playfully, and picks up the bridal bouquet, posing with it as if he were the bride. “How do I look?” He pouts, fluttering his eyelashes for dramatic effect.
“Beautiful,” Buck says, because he can for once, when it’s wrapped up in this joke.
Buck still catches a blush rise on Eddie’s cheeks, though. He turns around quickly to hide it, miming tossing the bouquet over his shoulder, which Buck pretends to catch, because he’d go along with pretty much anything for Eddie by now. Continuing to plan his wedding, for example.
“Aw!” Buck turns, forgetting for a moment they had an audience. Heather is watching them, clutching a hand over her heart. “You two are just so cute,” she says. “So, when’s the big day?”
It hits Buck like a bucket of cold water. He blinks, turning to Eddie, who doesn’t look like he’s doing better than Buck. He stares with his mouth half open, looking off into the distance, a faint blush on his face.
The florist looks between them, clearly uncomfortable. “Oh, I’m—sorry, have you not set a date yet? Usually, that’s already sorted, but if this is just a preliminary visit—”
“Sorry,” Buck says, his mouth finally working. “No, sorry. We have a date—I mean, he does, with my help. I’m just the wedding planner.”
She looks between them again, eyes wide. “Oh my goodness. There I go, making assumptions. Well, Mr. Groom, tell me about your partner. What do they like?”
“Um, she likes irises, ” he says, still looking like he’s off somewhere else.
“Oh, wonderful! We have some great options…” Heather runs through them all, showing off table arrangements, bouquets. She has bridal hair pieces, even, if Ana is interested in that. Buck takes his notes and pictures, so he can share them all with Ana later.
They don’t hire her right then and there, Eddie saying he needs to talk with Ana first, but Buck already knows she’ll be impressed with the arrangements. Eddie seemed impressed too, even if he looked a little dazed through the meeting.
They make it back to Buck’s truck when he makes a show of patting down his pockets, pretending he doesn’t feel his phone in his back left. “Shit, I think I left my phone in there. I’m just gonna run back in.”
He thinks Eddie laughs at him, but he’s already on his way back inside, on a mission. He picks up the plant Eddie had been eyeing, Sedum rubrotinctum—or, jelly bean plant—the tag says. He quickly pays and asks for a bag, which Eddie zeroes in on as soon as Buck’s returned.
“Thought you were looking for your phone,” he teases.
“It’s for my sister!” he lies, placing the bag in the back seat before Eddie can look inside. It can be a little wedding present. Something nice for Eddie.
*
“I think I’ve had thoughts about Eddie that no one in the world has ever had before.”
Buck’s been staring at Maddie’s ceiling, laying on the floor of Jee’s play area. He was the dragon she slayed, and he hasn't mustered up the effort to get up yet, even after Maddie put her to bed. There’s one dark spot, about a foot away from the overhead light. It kind of looks like the freckle under Eddie’s eye, and Buck hasn’t been able to look away.
Maddie’s head comes into view, blocking it out, as she holds out a hand for Buck to grab before pulling him up off the floor. “Like what?” she asks, frowning. He probably shouldn't say the ceiling thing, she might not even know about the mark.
“Not anything bad. Just like—his teeth. He’s got these pointy canines that are right in my face when he smiles, and all I can think about is how cute they are and, like, what if I could reach out and feel them.”
Maddie looks alarmed, and Buck is very glad he kept the “and what they'd feel pressing into my neck” part to himself. He’s never met someone with sexy teeth before, he’s still working out how to process it.
Maddie, thankfully, doesn’t say anything else, and just drags him over to the couch to sit down, handing him a glass of wine she must’ve poured while Buck was still playing dead dragon. He takes a sip, noting it’s a smooth red, and not much else. “Can I admit something that I might regret?”
“Did you not just do that?” She mumbles into her own wine glass, which Buck chooses to ignore.
“I think you we’re right. I think I have a crush on Eddie.”
Maddie snorts, nearly choking on the wine she just drank. Buck glares at her once he’s sure she isn’t actually at risk. “Sorry, did you not just talk about wanting to feel up his teeth? That is the least surprising sentence you could've said.”
Buck groans. “Maddie, this is a disaster.”
“How exactly? You’ve had your little client crushes before. In fact, didn’t one couple fully ask you to join them for their wedding night?”
Buck’s face heats, remembering Zane and Jade. What Maddie doesn’t know is he did take them up on that offer.
“That’s—that’s different. That was just, you know, attraction. Sex. This is…” Buck hesitates, cringing at himself, “feelings. I like him.” Maddie sets her wine down, eyebrows drawn together. Buck fidgets under her stare, feeling embarrassment well up in him now that he’s said it out loud. He was right, he does regret it. “Which is so stupid and unprofessional. Like, I’m planning his wedding, which already has enough problems without adding this.”
“Hey.” She reaches across the table to his hand, stopping the tapping he didn’t notice he was doing. “It’s not stupid.”
“No, it definitely is,” Buck says with a choked laugh. “Planning this wedding feels worse every day. Or—not that’s even fully right. Because I like spending time with him! I’m, like, actively making up more work for myself just to see Eddie. I texted him earlier saying I need to take him wedding sock shopping? And for some reason he agreed. As if that’s a normal thing.”
“Maybe he wants to see you too.” Her eyes light up, teasing. “Maybe he even wants to touch your teeth.”
Buck bites the inside of his cheek. Maddie voiced the thoughts that have been swirling in his own head, lately. Buck is planning Eddie’s wedding—his very straight wedding, for a very straight couple, he has to remind himself that eight times a day, because sometimes, he thinks, maybe…
He’s caught Eddie looking back at him more times than he can count. And the blush that paints his cheeks so easily when Buck’s around. And the panic attacks about the wedding —familiar, not to Buck himself, but some of the stories he heard after he came out, people who had a more complicated time untangling it.
But that’s such a dangerous line of thinking that Buck shouldn't even be entertaining. Eddie’s just looking for a friend, while marrying the wrong girl. It happens every day. Buck shouldn't be overthinking it.
*
“Chris, this is our wedding planner, Buck.”
Buck crouches down to get eye level with Eddie’s son. He’s twelve, if Buck remembers right, an age that could be a little tricky when it comes to wedding planning—something not very cool to a preteen. With one obvious exception. “It’s so good to finally meet the best man. And you showed up for the most fun day.”
Christopher’s laugh is infectious. “Cake!” he exclaims. “I told dad he wasn’t allowed to do this one without me.”
“You’re a smart kid, Chris,” Buck says, standing back up to full height.
Eddie puts a hand on Christopher’s shoulder, staring down at his son with so much love it makes Buck’s stomach flip. It’s really, really awful, and maybe illegal for someone who looks like Eddie to be a caring father too. “Yeah, he’s gonna be the real expert for this one. I have a feeling he might get the final say,” Eddie says, winking.
Buck is in hell.
There are five different cakes for them to try. Buck has worked with this bakery before, and has tasted all of them, but he feels the excitement anew when he watches Christopher's eyes light up as the slices are brought out.
He demolishes every piece as quick as possibly, even cheekily trying to sneak extra bites off Eddie’s place. Eddie is on guard every time though, pick his plate up, and swinging it out of reach “Nice try,” he says, before shoveling an extra large forkful into his mouth. A sweet tooth must run in the family.
Ana was a lot more generous with her own plate, letting Christopher have the rest of hers.
Buck watches it all take place feeling more like an outsider than he ever has planning this wedding. It’s easier to grapple with now that he’s named what he’s been feeling: a crush. It puts more things into perspective. He wanted to see Eddie unhappy with Ana, because he wanted Eddie, and he was jealous.
The cracks he was seeing in their relationship, and the worries he had about the wedding—that was exaggerated projections. It’s becoming even clearer, watching Eddie and Ana now, with this enlightenment.
With Christopher between them, they look like a real family. A happy one, at that.
At least he knows now, so he can pack it away, and continue being professional.
“So, what’s everyone’s favorite?” Buck asked, once they’ve all had a chance to try each one.
Christopher chimes in immediately. “The chocolate, obviously.”
“That one was good,” Ana agrees, “And with the salted caramel, it was divine.”
Eddie hums. “I actually really liked the pistachio one.”
“Boo,” Christopher heckles, and Buck tries to hide his laugh. The kid certainly isn’t shy.
Ana smiles, putting her arm around Christopher to join in the teasing. “I think it’s two against one, babe.”
“You’re ganging up on me,” he says, dramatically clutching a hand over his heart. “Buck, come on, back me up over here.”
Buck lets out a low whistle. “I don’t know, you said Chris was the boss today, so…”
Ana laughs. “Maybe it’s an excuse to have another taste. Here,” she says, offering Eddie the last bite on her plate.
He takes it off the fork in her outstretched hand in one bite. “Mm,” he moans, long and exaggerated, closing his eyes. Buck will have to erase that from his memory. “It’s good, but still can’t top the pistachio cake.”
Ana smiles at him, eyes full of adoration. “Maybe we’ll have to get both.” She leans forward to brush a stray crumb from his lip, and Buck realizes with a jolt it’s the most casual intimacy he’s seen from them. For a moment, they look like any other couple in love—like any other family, with Christopher giggling along next to them.
“Do you think they make any cupcakes here?” Christopher asks.
“You know what,” Ana says, leaning in. closer to Chris with a smile, “I bet they do. Why don’t we check what they have at the counter. Maybe we can order something to take home.”
Chris is already getting his crutches to stand up by the time she finishes her sentence, huge grin taking over his face. Ana places a hand on his back as they walk over to the counter. Buck can still hear Christopher talking excitedly,“This is the best day ever. You guys should get married more often.” He sees Ana laugh in response, but the rest of their conversation fades with distance.
“They get along great,” Buck says to Eddie, who’s been watching it all with a grin on his face too.
“Yeah. He really loves her,” he says wistfully.
But you don’t, Buck can’t help but think. He pushes it aside, though, telling himself for the millionth time that maybe he’s wrong. Today has been great with them, actually. Eddie looks so happy watching Ana and his son together, maybe this was the context Buck was missing before. Staying positive, Buck goes out on a limb and asks, “Are you two thinking of having another kid?”
It’s immediately clear it’s a mistake, as he watches Eddie’s face shutter in real time. His mouth twists and he looks away from the happy scene across the bakery. “Uh, I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it.”
“Oh. Right, of course.” Buck stumbles out, trying to salvage the conversation, but Eddie’s already standing up.
“I’m gonna hit the bathroom,” he mumbles before making a quick exit, leaving Buck at the table alone.
*
Buck gets swept up in planning another couple’s wedding. It’s the biggest one he’s ever planned, and logistically, it does take up more of his time than the Flores-Diaz wedding at this stage, when most of the big stuff has already been taken care of. It’s not like Buck lets it fall to the wayside and be forgotten—he’s still doing his job—but a lot of that now is phone calls and making sure payments go through.
There’s no need for him to see Eddie for a few weeks. It’s probably for the best, he tells himself, getting a break. He’s become way too invested.
It doesn’t end up being much of a break though, when Eddie still texts him most days—just to talk, about anything and everything. And Buck is a weak, weak man who replies to every single one.
i haven’t seen you in so long man. i’m staring to miss our hangouts, Eddie sends one night, out of the blue.
soon, Buck types out, opening the emoji keyboard to add clinking beer mugs. His eyes catch on his most recent, the stupid red heart emoji taunting him.
He adds the beer emoji and hits send. Eddie hearts it and Buck wants to throw his phone across the room.
*
“I feel so useless at this,” Eddie says, holding up two nearly identical white button downs. “Ana, she knows her stuff, you know? But I’m just winging it. I don't know what I’m doing.”
“Which is exactly why I’m here.” Buck points to the shirt in Eddie’s left hand. Eddie would look breathtaking in either option, Buck knows, but that one is a nice breathable cotton. Eddie will thank him for it.
Eddie didn’t need him here, not really—not when Buck had been sending him options for weeks now, but Eddie had been dragging his feet, and kept asking when Buck had time to go with him. I’m bad at this, he kept saying. So, on Buck’s first free day in what feels like ages, he met Eddie at the mall.
“I swear you pick the more expensive one every time,” Eddie says, looking at the tag.
Buck doesn’t dignify that with a response. If Eddie wants cheap, Buck would happily have him forego the shirt all together, walk down the aisle with a bare chest. But in those fantasies, Buck would be joining him up there, not off to the side in case anything goes wrong, so he’ll be taking that suggestion to his grave.
Not seeing Eddie for a few weeks didn’t do anything at all to dull his feelings. If anything, maybe they’ve gotten worse.
He takes the cotton shirt from Eddie’s hand and adds it to their cart. They’ve already ordered Eddie a suit, so today is about the accessories. With the shirt done, they can move onto the shoes.
“I, uh, never had to do all of this for my last wedding, you know?” Eddie says, when they've made it to the shoe section. “Think I just wore the same shoes that I got for my abuelo’s funeral. Thought it would maybe feel different for this one, but I guess…” Eddie trails off, staring at the wall of shoes with something like dread. “Maybe I’m just bad at getting married. Just missing that skill, or something.”
“No, come on. You’re not bad, you’re just—” Buck bites his tongue. You just don’t want to marry her. It’s not his place. “That’s why I’m here,” Buck repeats, lamely.
Eddie rolls his eyes, his sharp canine poking out of his grin. His shoulders relax as some of the tension leaves him. “Is this the worst wedding you've planned?” He asks, joking. He grabs a pair of shoes, seemingly at random, and sits down on the bench.
“Oh, hell no,” Buck says, as he hands Eddie a second box of shoes. Nicer than the ones he grabbed. “That would be my sister's.”
“Your sister?” he asks, eyebrows climbing to his hairline. Somehow, even his forehead is beautiful, Buck muses.
“Don’t get me wrong, I planned her the best wedding. It was beautiful, and classy, and I pulled every single string I had for her.”
“So, what happened?”
“The groom didn’t show.”
Eddie gapes at him, completely abandoning the task at hand. “Fuck. He stood her up?”
“No, worse! He landed himself in the hospital with a bad viral encephalitis infection, and memory loss. We ended up ditching the perfect wedding I planned to get hitched in a hospital room. I’m still mad at them to this day. Well, no I’m not. I love them and it was beautiful and I cried a lot. But that was absolutely the worst wedding I planned, so the bar is very low.”
Eddie snorts, shaking his head. He finally gets the first shoes on, standing up to take a few steps. They squeak when he walks in them, which Buck immediately tells him is a no.
“Come on, they're not that bad,” Eddie jokes, doing a little shuffle dance, proving exactly how bad they are. He’s completely ridiculous. Buck all but manhandles him back to the bench, nudging the box he brought over closer.
While Eddie ties the laces, Buck asks something he’s been curious about for a while. “What was your first wedding like?”
Eddie looks up at him, surprised. “Uh, nothing like this one. It was quick, for one. Neither of us really wanted it.” Buck must look confused, because Eddie immediately adds, “Shannon got pregnant. We were both strongly urged to do the right thing. We were pretty young, you know, so we went along with it.”
Eddie says it all so blasé, like it’s not something that’s actively making Buck’s chest ache more and more. He tries to keep the words in but they spill out anyway. “It, um… it sounds like you’re just going along with it this time too.”
Eddie shrugs. “I guess. But maybe that’s the best way for me to do it, you know?” Eddie sighs. “I’ve never enjoyed enjoyed the whole dating thing. Ana—I had already known her a little bit, and so had Chris. So, it just made sense.”
“A ready-made family. Like a pre-made meal from the grocery store.”
Eddie rolls his eyes, scoffing. “Okay, you’re making it sound worse than it is. But also, there’s nothing wrong with those meals. I’m not the best cook, so, tonight, instead of wasting my time and money making something that’ll probably end up burnt and inedible, I'm gonna stop by the store and grab a frozen lasagna. It tastes just as good, it's easy, and my kid is happy."
There’s so much he wants to say to that.He wants to sit Eddie down, and hold his face gently, and say: you shouldn't be able to compare your future wife to a frozen lasagna. You deserve better than that. I want better for you. I’ll cook you lasagna every day of the week, if you’d let me. All that manages to come out is: “It’s not just as good.”
“Well, I can't taste the difference! And what's the other option? I don't eat? I’m just alone?”
Buck frowns, dread pooling in his gut. That’s not the only other option, he wants to say. He doesn’t. Instead, he watches Eddie stand up in the new shoes, taking a few steps before deciding, “These are a little too stiff.”
Buck laughs, shaking his head at Eddie, playing at exasperated rather than worried. He turns back to the shelf, intent to get Eddie the right shoe at least.
*
Before Buck knows it, they’re in the final stretch. Everything has been booked and paid for, with only the final touches remaining. The days start to count down lower and lower, and each time Buck sees Eddie, the dark circles under his eyes seem more pronounced. He never says anything about being tired, or stressed, but it hangs over him, more and more. The only thing that seems to help him relax is the time spent with Buck, after everything has been done for the day, when Eddie hangs back and shares a beer with him. Buck had never spent this much down-time with a client before, but he can’t find it in himself to turn down Eddie anytime he asks. Even if he should.
Buck’s horrible crush has only grown, just like his dread for the upcoming nuptials. It would be a completely different story if Buck thought Eddie was happy, but he’s not, and it only feels more obvious the closer they get. Buck feels like he’s designing the noose for Eddie’s neck.
It’s one of those days that Eddie’s stayed at Buck’s long after they’d been working on the seating chart. They’re sitting outside in the late September heat, and Buck has been watching a bead of sweat make its way down Eddie’s neck. Buck looks away when it reaches his collar, taking a long drag from his beer.
They don’t talk about the wedding during their so-called guy-time. it’s an unspoken rule Buck picked up early on, but tonight, four weeks away, it itches at him, like a scab he can’t stop picking at.
He shouldn't say anything, it’ll only dampen the mood for both of them, but—somewhere in him, he hopes if he keeps pressing into the wound, Eddie will finally wake up to it. “Have you started your vows yet?” he asks, still looking out into the garden rather than Eddie’s perfect sweat-glistened body.
Buck turns when he hears Eddie sputter, coughing around his beer, startled by the question. When he recovers, he sets his beer down, schooling his face carefully blank. “Nope,” he says, scratching his nose, “not yet. It’s kinda early for that, right?”
“Not really. It’s about a month away now.” Eddie flinches, small and quick, but Buck catches it. “It’ll be here before you know it.”
Eddie breathes in through his nose, holds it, then breathes out through his mouth. It almost looks like a breathing technique. “Yup. It’s soon.”
“Yeah. So, your vows—you should start them.”
Eddie nods to himself, looking at his lap. His mouth twists for a moment before he asks, “Any tips?”
“Well, it’s supposed to be, like, a declaration of your love.” Buck pauses for a moment, trying to get his words right. “Just—just think about why you’re doing this. And what you want. And it should come to you.” It’s not very subtle, and he worries for a moment that he crossed a line.
Something crosses Eddie's face before he looks back up at Buck with an attempt at a grin. It doesn't quite meet his eyes. “You can’t just give me a template, Mr. Wedding Planner?”
Buck laughs, patting him on the back. “No, this one’s all you, man. Listen to your heart.”
*
Buck goes with Eddie to his final suit fitting, even though he could absolutely go on his own. Buck doesn’t point that out though, and neither does Eddie. Buck tries to tamp down the feeling that he’s doing something illicit, spending this extra time with Eddie that goes beyond planning his wedding. It isn't enough to stop him from doing it though. He only has ten more days before Eddie’s a married man.
Eddie steps out from behind the curtain in his perfectly tailored suit, a classic black. It could be boring on anyone else, but Eddie looks like he was poured into it. Honestly, he could probably wear a trash-bag and still have that effect. Buck’s mouth goes a little dry when he spins around and strikes a pose.
“How do I look?” he asks, his cheeks tinted red.
Beautiful, Buck doesn’t say. “Good. Well, almost. Just let me—” Buck steps forward, reaching out to straighten Eddie’s tie. It feels like a mistake immediately, being this close to him. He can hear Eddie inhale sharply the moment Buck makes contact. It’s a quick fix, but Buck lingers, unable to move away. He brushes invisible dirt off of the suit’s shoulders, then, looks up. Eddie’s staring right at him, but his gaze is low, caught somewhere between Buck’s eyes and his chin.
Buck wants to lean in so badly, just let himself give in to the pull, like gravity. The sudden strength of that desire is what shocks him out of it. He steps back, clearing his throat. “There you go. Perfect. You look like a proper groom.”
Buck turns away, as quickly as he can, trying to find something else to do. Something to distract from the fucking moment they just had. “Can’t believe by next week you’ll be married,” he says, mostly to remind himself. He finds the tie rack, flipping through it. “You sure you don’t want a pop of color or something?” he asks, keeping his back to Eddie. He doesn’t get much of a response, just a grunt. Or maybe that’s the ringing in Buck’s ears. He keeps looking through the ties, and talking just to fill up the space between them. “Maybe I’ll get myself one. I haven't gotten myself a new one in a while, and obviously I need them for work, now.”
He doesn’t even register what he’s saying anymore, just prattling on, looking through the same ties three times over. He thinks he would’ve gone on forever if he didn’t hear a thud behind him. He turns to find Eddie, sitting on the ground, leaning back against the wall, hand clutching his chest.
“Eddie, Eddie!” Buck rushes over. “Are you—I need to call 9-1-1.” He pulls his phone out with shaky hands, but before he can put through the call, Eddie clutches at his arm, shaking his head, eyes wide and panicked.
It hits Buck suddenly, what's happening. “Panic attack?” he asks.
Eddie squeezes his eyes shut, nodding. His grip on Buck’s arm loosens.
“Hey, just breathe with me, okay? You’re okay.” Eventually, Buck manages to calm him down enough to change back into his normal clothes and leave the store. It’s all a blur for Buck, for once glad Bride-and-Groomzilla meltdowns he’s witnessed have taught him how to remain calm himself. Buck shuttles them both to Eddie’s truck, and cajoles him into the passenger seat. “I can Uber back for mine. This is what I’m here for.”
Eddie laughs, humorlessly. “I don’t think that’s exactly true.”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s what I’m here for today. Let me drive you home.”
Eddie shakes his head. "Not home. Not yet. I can’t like this.”
“Okay.” Buck takes a breath, then says, “How about mine?”
*
“How are you feeling?” Buck asks once he has Eddie settled on his couch and a hot cup of tea in hand. He was quiet during the car ride, staring out the window. Buck didn’t say much either, not sure what to say. Now, he’s probably hovering, but the urge to take care of Eddie surpasses his worry about overstepping.
“I’m good. Sorry about that back there, that was…” Eddie pauses, taking a breath and then letting it out. “Selfish. I shouldn't have put you through that. Especially in public, I hope I didn't cause a scene for you—”
“Whoa. Hold on, pause. That’s not at all what I’m worried about here. That wasn’t selfish, Jesus, Eddie, I was concerned for you.”
“Well, you don’t have to be. I’m fine.”
Buck sighs, sitting down on the couch next to Eddie. He holds his own tea tighter in his hands, the mug feeling hotter than it should be. “I thought that—that maybe you’d stopped having those. The panic attacks.”
Eddie laughs, hollowly. He looks exhausted and miserable. “Nope. Just, uh, got better about keeping them to myself I guess.”
“Eddie…” Buck doesn’t know what to say, but he can’t stop the physical ache in his own chest. “Is it—is it always about the wedding?”
“Not… not technically the wedding, more like, I don’t know… the marriage.”
“Eddie,” Buck groans, feeling half-hysterical, but one of them needs to stay calm here. “That’s worse.”
“Yeah, well…” Eddie shrugs, defeated.
Buck wants to get closer, to touch him, but he won’t. He keeps his hands wrapped around his mug, and turns towards Eddie, getting his full attention. He doesn’t speak until Eddie’s looking right back at him. “Do you want to marry her?”
“What kind of question is that? You’ve been planning my—”
“I’m not asking as your wedding planner. I’m asking as someone who cares about you. Do you want to marry her? It’s okay if the answer is no.”
“I…” Eddie starts, then pauses. He looks upward as his mouth twists, like he’s fighting back something. Finally, looking back to Buck, he says, “I want to want to marry her.”
“Eddie,” Buck says, his voice breaking. He feels like he’s approaching Eddie like an injured animal. All he wants to do is help. “That’s not enough.”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I—” He squeezes his eyes shut, his head hitting the back of Buck’s couch. “Ana’s great. She’s—she’s perfect, exactly what I should want. I don’t know why it’s this hard.”
“You can’t force yourself to love her if you don’t.”
“Chris is so happy. And so is Ana. If it’s just me—”
“It won’t be. She… maybe she’s happy now—” Buck won’t tell him that he doesn’t think that’s the case. “—but it won’t last. Eddie, you will both get hurt even more if you keep trying to force this.”
“What else am I supposed to do?”
“You can call it off, there’s still time.”
Eddie laughs, sounding defeated. “The wedding’s in ten days. Some of my family has already flown in. So has Ana’s. Not to mention all the money we spent… I can’t back out now, just because of—”
“You don’t love her,” Buck says, as plain and firm as he can.
“Christopher does. And it’s not like I don't like her. We get along, she’s—”
Buck shakes his head, cutting Eddie off. “That can’t be how you talk about your wife. If you go through with this you will be miserable, and so will she. Please,” Buck begs, “don’t put yourself through that.”
“Buck…”
“I can take care of all the cancellations for you. Hell, I—I can even call the guests,” he knows he sounds desperate, but now that he’s finally said it, he can’t stop. He just wants to offer up all he possibly can to help. “And I won’t charge you for my rate.”
Eddie smiles sadly. “That can’t be a good business practice.”
“I’ll charge you double if you go through with it,” Buck threatens. That gets him a real laugh from Eddie at least.
“You’re something else, Buck.” Eddie’s still grinning as he looks at Buck, a million emotions passing over his face. His beautiful sharp tooth is just visible, pressing into his bottom lip. Buck can’t stop looking at it.
“I just want to help. And I want you to have what you want. Whatever that is. I just want you to be happy.”
“I am,” Eddie says.
It’s such a clear lie, and it breaks Buck’s heart more than anything else could. “I’m not asking you to leave her for me.” He laughs, a little hollowly. “I am that selfish, but I’m not that naive”
“You’re not being selfish, you’re—” Eddie blinks, stumbling over his words. “You’re just being a good friend.”
“I, uh, don’t think it’s being friendly. The flirting. and—God, Eddie, I almost kissed you today.”
“You did?” Eddie asks, barely a whisper.
“Yeah. And it felt like—for a moment, like you wanted it too.”
Eddie blinks up at him, mouth opening and closing, not sure what to say, until he lands on: “I don’t…” he trails off, never finishing his sentence. Instead, he stands up, placing his tea, mostly untouched, on the coffee table. “I should—I should get going.” He’s avoiding Buck’s eyes while he grabs his things.
Buck stands up suddenly. “Wait!”
Eddie’s shoulder’s drop. He looks exhausted, but shockingly he stays put. Buck doesn’t waste any time questioning, it, he races to his room before Eddie tries to leave again. He got Eddie a wedding present but maybe if he gets it now, it's not a wedding gift anymore. One less thing to get married for, even if it’s this small, stupid thing. It’s all he has, though, and he feels desperate. Eddie, thankfully, is still waiting by the door when Buck gets back. He’s so relieved he all but shoves the plant into Eddie’s hand. “Here.”
Eddie looks down at the pot he’s now cradling. He touches one of the little waxy leaves, just like he had in the flower shop. When he looks back up at Buck, he looks almost pained. “What are you doing, Buck?”
“I bought it for you. It was supposed to be your wedding present. But, um—it’s not that anymore. I want you to have it. No vow reciting necessary. It’s just a normal gift, and it’s yours.”
Eddie looks between the jelly bean plant and Buck. “You know I’ll probably kill it, right?”
“I believe in you to keep this plant alive,” Buck says earnestly. “But even if you don’t, that’s okay. It just—it made you smile back in the store. So you should have it for as long as you can, even if it’s only a month. It’s still worth it.”
Eddie stares at Buck, frozen. His chest rising and falling the only tell that time hasn’t fully stopped. There’s a hint of red spreading over his cheeks, and his gaze drops slowly—so, so, slowly that Buck barely comprehends it—to Buck’s mouth.
God, Buck wants to kiss him again, and maybe he actually will this time. But as soon as Buck goes to move, Eddie’s gaze breaks, and his whole posture changes, ram-rod straight. The moment is over. “I have to go,” he says. “Thank you. For the plant, and um, everything today.”
“Of course,” Buck says, resigned. He lets Eddie leave this time, the door shutting quietly behind him.
*
A knock startles Buck awake. He’s still on the couch—must’ve dozed off after his second beer. He blearily checks his watch, seeing that it’s ten past eleven. Too late for someone to be knocking at his door for any normal reason. The knocking persists though, growing even more rapid. The stiffness in his body from sleeping on the couch means he moves more slowly than he’d like, and by the time he reaches the door, his heart is pounding with anticipation, like maybe somehow he already knew—
“Eddie.” His voice is still scratchy and raw from sleep, and he feels just the same. Seeing Eddie standing on his porch in the middle of the night, he wonders for half a second if he’s still dreaming, but he can feel the breeze on his face, and the doorknob in his hand. And Eddie looks just as frantic as Buck feels.
“Hey,” he says, eyes wild. “Uh, I just wanted…” He trails off, gaze jumping between Buck’s eyes and his mouth, before settling on the latter. He doesn’t know who moves first, but suddenly they’re colliding. Buck licks into Eddie’s mouth like a man starved, shoving him up against the wall. His brain has shut off entirely at the first touch, and now he is nothing but action and desire. Eddie seems much the same, tugging Buck impossibly closer, moaning into every kiss. Buck presses a leg between Eddie’s thighs, and groans when he ruts forwards, already half hard. Buck wants to devour him.
Somehow, he steers them to the bedroom, losing all of their clothes along the way.
He gets Eddie laid out bare on his bed, looking like the best meal Buck’s ever going to have. Buck drops to his knees, between Eddie's splayed out legs. He runs his hands up and down Eddie’s thighs, feeling the hair under his palms. “This okay?” Buck asks. He realizes it’s the first words they’ve said to each other since they kissed. He should probably be more worried about that, but he can’t find anything in him to care.
Eddie stares at him, propped up by his elbows, like Buck is the only thing in the world. “Yeah. Yes,” Eddie croaks out, nodding eagerly.
Eddie’s head flops back against the bed at the first touch to his cock. Buck strokes him slowly, rewarded with a long moan pulled from Eddie’s throat. It’s still not enough though, he thinks, hovering over Eddie’s cock, breathing it in. He almost feels drunk, even though he hasn’t had a single drink — drunk off of Eddie.
“Buck, Buck,” Eddie chants, out of breath, when Buck slides his mouth over his cock. It’s maybe the best sound Buck’s ever heard, egging him on. Buck closes his eyes, and loses himself in it.
As Eddie gets close, he gets even louder, his thighs tensing under Buck’s hands. It spurs Buck on, wanting to see just how loud Eddie will get. Before he finds out, Eddie tugs at Buck’s hair, presumably to warn him, as if Buck could miss the signs. Buck taps him twice on the thigh to say, I’m good. Or maybe more accurately, go ahead, please come in my mouth. Either way, it doesn’t seem to get the message across when Eddie starts tugging even harder. Buck pulls off, intending only to verbalize his message, when instead, Eddie uses that opportunity to pull Buck up, to crash their mouths together. “Please,” he pants, “Want it like this.”
Buck could never say no to that. He wraps a hand around Eddie to continue where he left off, while kissing him deep and slow. He swallows Eddie’s moans when he starts stroking, absentmindedly rutting into Eddie's hip, just to give himself some relief.
He’s so focused on pleasing Eddie that he doesn’t even realize Eddie’s reaching between them until he feels his knuckles brush against Buck’s cock. The shock of it has Buck losing his rhythm momentarily. Eddie whines urging him on while making a clumsy grab at Buck’s crotch. Buck obliges, adjusting his hips so that Eddie can get at him properly, and then goes back to working Eddie over.
Eddie’s grip is a little loose and unsure, but even so, Buck is pretty sure he won’t last long. He’s so worked up already over seeing Eddie like this—hearing him and touching him.
“You’re doing so fucking good,” Buck mumbles, biting into Eddie’s lip, “Making me feel so good.”
Eddie moans, stroking Buck faster. He can tell Eddie’s close again, and he is too. It doesn’t take much longer before Eddie is falling over the edge, and pulling Buck right along with him, adding to the mess between them.
Afterwards, cleaned up and tangled together in bed, Buck kisses Eddie languidly, like he never wants it to end. When they break apart, Buck whispers, “Stay.” He wants it too much to be embarrassed about how needy he sounds.
Eddie's eyes flutter open, looking over Buck’s face. “Okay,” he whispers back. They fall asleep tangled together, trading kisses.
Buck wakes up alone the next morning, all traces of Eddie—his clothes, his phone, his shoes—gone, like he was never there. Buck should’ve expected that, but his chest still aches when he realizes what happened.
He had never asked about Ana the night before—if Eddie had left her. If he had finally called off the wedding. He didn’t ask because he didn’t want to, knowing that he might not like the answer. All he had wanted was Eddie, right there and then. He brushed everything else aside, everything that he should’ve said, so that he could have that moment. And now the moment’s over.
Buck finds his own clothes folded up, sitting on his kitchen table. He almost laughs at the sight. Eddie must’ve had to sort through the mess when he was looking for his own. Buck takes a seat at the table, resting his head in his hands, and breathes.
Buck spends the rest of the morning moping. There’s no other word for it. He moves slowly, only going as far as from the kitchen to the couch, eating dry cereal right out of the box. He has a meeting scheduled with Ana at noon to go over some final tweaks on the seating chart. Whenever he thinks about it his stomach twists like he might be sick, so he just turns the volume up on the TV louder, trying to drown out the dread.
The universe must have some sympathy for him though, just when he’s about to start getting ready to face the music, he gets a text:
Can’t make our meeting
No explanation, no reschedule, but Buck is too relieved to question it right now. He reacts to the message with a thumbs up because he feels too guilty to type out any words, and then goes back to his day of moping.
Tomorrow, he tells himself. Tomorrow he’ll rally, and pick himself back up. He’ll plan their wedding, the best wedding he can, despite all of his concerns. He can pack that all away and continue on like it never happened.
*
Buck’s woken up by the shrill ringing of his phone. He pats around his nightstand without opening his eyes, until he makes contact with the phone. It’s Ana.
Suddenly, he feels wide awake. It’s just before eight o’clock. They didn’t have anything scheduled this early. His palms start sweating. Maybe she knows, and she’s calling to fire him and call him a homewrecker, or leaving every bad review she can to torch his business.
Or she could just be calling because he’s her wedding planner and she’s getting married next week.
He takes a deep breath, and answers the call. “Hey, Ana!” He tries to sound as normal as possible. “Is this about the seating chart?”
There’s a pause, long enough for Buck to start thinking maybe she called him by mistake, but then he hears a sniff. “No. No, we don’t have to do that,” she says in a shaky voice.
Buck’s stomach drops. Somehow he manages to ask, “Are you—are you okay?”
“No, I’m not. The wedding’s off,” Ana says, sniffling again. It’s becoming very clear that she’s crying. “He’s said he can’t marry me. That he’s gay!” Buck tries not to wince at the way she spits out the word, knowing it’s the shock, and the incredibly difficult situation she’s been put in. He braces himself, waiting for the other shoe to drop, and the accusations directed at him. She laughs, a horrible wet sound. “God, you probably knew. Everyone probably knew, except me!”
Buck breathes out a small sense of relief. Eddie hasn’t told her everything then, and he certainly won’t confirm that he knew a hell of a lot more than just that. And that he was part of the reason this is happening. He doesn’t respond at all, just listens, and let’s her get it all out as she cries over the line. When she’s done, he packs all of his own emotions away and puts on his best customer service voice, the one that’s gotten him all his five-star reviews. “I’ll take care of everything. You don’t have to worry about a thing, okay? Just take care of yourself.”
Buck calls Eddie as soon as they hang up, but it goes straight to voicemail. He calls again, and the same thing happens.
He tosses his phone down and flops back hard onto his bed. He’s still a little shell-shocked by the whole thing, and there’s a million things to do now. Maybe he should feel hurt by not hearing it from Eddie himself but—
Buck smiles to himself. All he can focus on is the relief he feels for Eddie.
*
“Buck?”
The familiar voice has Buck stumbling, nearly face-planting into the ground, but he manages a quick save. He whips around, half expecting no one to be there, that he conjured it up out of pure longing and delusion, but there at the end of the aisle, standing in front of the dried pasta, is Eddie Diaz.
He’s wearing a white sleeveless shirt, and blue jeans, looking just as beautiful as ever. Maybe somehow even more, thanks to the new mustache adorning his face.
“Eddie!” Buck beams, heading towards him, taking two steps at a time. Once he’s in front of Eddie, he almost pulls him right in for a hug, before realizing that might be weird. His arms awkwardly hang in the air before he recovers and clasps them behind his back, hoping Eddie didn't notice the slip.
“It’s so good to see you,” he says. Good. It’s the understatement of the year. “I like…” Buck points to his own face, gesturing towards his upper lip. He watches with delight at Eddie’s cheeks pinking-up. Just as easy a year later.
“Thanks,” Eddie says, smoothing it down with his forefinger and thumb, not able to tamp down his grin. “Christopher gives me shit over it every day.”
“He’s a kid, he doesn’t know anything.”
Eddie laughs, shaking his head fondly. His stupidly gorgeous canines peaking out. Buck’s pretty sure he has an entire kaleidoscope of butterflies in his stomach. “How’ve you been?”
“I’m good.” Buck shrugs. “You know, still lots of weddings. Lots of cake tasting. What about you? How’s your year been?”
“Good. It’s been good. I mean, it was hard at first, but it’s been really great. Grew this mustache, you know. And I kept that plant alive.”
Buck grins. “You did?”
“Barely. But somehow it’s still hanging on." He pauses, then adds, "And I, uh, started dating.” Buck does his best to keep the smile on his face as the butterflies plummet to an instant death. “Even got myself a boyfriend for a bit, but it didn’t work out. So, I’m single again.”
Nevermind. The kaleidoscope is back in full force again. He responds all too fast, “Me too! Single. Very single.”
Eddie smiles, then falters. “I’m sorry I never called.”
Buck waves him off, still riding off the high of single. “It’s fine.”
“No, it was shitty. And I did want to. But I was in a really weird place, and—”
Buck winces, vividly remembering the last time they were together. “And I complicated that even more. I never wanted to make it worse for you.”
“You didn’t. Buck, you stopped me from making a huge mistake, and helped me get my head out of my ass. If it wasn’t for you I would’ve married her and stayed in the closet for who knows how long. You saved me.”
“Oh, I—I wouldn’t go that far.”
“Well, I would. You gave me the push I needed. And I was also, you know, completely enamored with you. And that felt too big for me back then. I should’ve called to say that, at least.”
“Enamored?” Buck repeats, breathless.
“Is that too much?”
“No, I think that’s, uh, a good word. Me too.”
“Yeah?” He smiles, stepping closer. He looks up at Buck under his lashes, and says, “You should ask me out on a date then.”
Buck beams, leaning in. His hand finds it’s way to Eddie’s waist, where it fits perfectly. “Okay.”
*
Two years later, Buck plans Eddie’s wedding again. He makes it down the aisle this time.