Chapter Text
It was a mistake from the very beginning and he knew it. How could he be convinced? After all, he was old enough to know better. It will be good for marketing , his marketing consultant had said (He should have fired him a long time ago.). Why? He was a businessman, not some celebrity who needed people to love him. He didn’t need people to be able to do his job and make money. It’s a good idea , his therapist had said. You should be around people, make friends, find someone to love. Why? He had a huge company full of people who always wanted something from him. Pay raise. Bonuses. Benefits. Longer holidays. New business strategy. New coffee machine instead of the broken one on the sixth floor. More alcohol to the Crow Club. New chef to Black Wings Hotel. People talked too much and Kaz preferred silence. Was it that hard to understand? He didn’t think so. Why would he need a friend? The numbers were better, predictable. He had kruge and could buy whatever he wanted. If he needed company, he would buy a dog.
Kruge won’t keep you warm at night.
Sure, try buying a sauna and see how it warms you.
Why were you so stupid and let them convince you?
Some stupid dance show. Kaz hadn’t even known such a thing existed before and was quite content in his ignorance. He didn’t care about dancing at all. Too many touches and no benefits. There was no reason to try it, he had his favourite sports activities that didn’t require a lot of human contact. After all, he had his own gym and his own martial arts coach. So why had he done it? Why had he agreed to participate in this meaningless charade? Now he had made a fool of himself. What grown man would run away when he was unexpectedly touched by his dance partner who was actually a really nice girl? No one, only total loser Kaz Brekker.
“Is this seat taken?”
Kaz started in surprise. He really hadn’t thought anyone could find him here since he was sitting on the edge of the roof. Besides, he hadn’t even heard her coming, and he had never been caught off guard before. She was looking at him with those big dark eyes and he felt like a complete idiot.
“Uh, yeah… it’s…,” he stammered.
Breathe, idiot, it’s not that hard.
“No, it’s not taken,” he tried again.
She smiled and sat down next to him, but not too close so he still felt safe. He knew who she was, of course. He had found out all the names of the contestants in advance and checked them on the Internet. Inej Ghafa, dancer and acrobat. Very talented, modest, hardworking, having her own charity. They had seen each other during a group photo shoot.
While he was watching her warily, she was looking somewhere in the distance above the roof of the nearest buildings.
“Do you think we could see the sea from there?” she asked suddenly.
“Only if this building was one floor higher.”
“Oh, that’s a shame.”
Any normal person would ask: Do you like the sea? But since he wasn’t normal, he didn’t ask, just kept sitting there in silence. It wasn’t unpleasant. For once no one wanted anything from him and he could just be and breathe freely.
“How did you know I was here?” Kaz dared to ask after a while because he didn’t like puzzles he wasn’t able to solve.
Inej shrugged. “It seemed like a nice place.”
“I’m not hiding here, you know.”
“Someone like you can’t really hide,” she remarked, and Kaz wasn’t sure what that meant.
But of course, he didn’t ask.
“Imogen is quite worried,” Inej continued.
Of course she was. Kaz was probably the first to run away from her with a panic attack after just one touch. Who did this in front of such a beautiful girl? The girl who he could really like? After all these years of therapy, he had to be better. Yet he wasn’t. It was their third training and so far everything had been good, but then she touched him unexpectedly and Kaz just panicked. At least he was sane enough to get out of there before a panic attack brought him to his knees. No one had seen him like this. It should be fine.
“ It isn’t easy for me either ,” Inej said, and when Kaz glanced up at her, she was looking down at the roof somewhere and her cheeks were slightly pink. “Do you want to go back?”
“I’m not sure I can,” Kaz admitted.
Inej nodded in understanding. “I can text Imogen to stop worrying. Is that alright?”
“Yes.”
The girl smiled slightly, lowering her head to her phone. Kaz watched her the whole time. Her eyelashes were incredibly long, so they covered her eyes like a fan. A long dark braid fell over her bare shoulder peeking out from her purple dance top. Her legs in black leggings hung over the edge of the roof just like his. Kaz could smell some kind of floral scent coming from her, but wasn’t sure what it could be. The smell was soft as if he was lying on his back in tall grass in a meadow, hands under his head, looking up at the clouds, trying to figure out why some of them seemed puffy, or why they moved so slowly.
“Done,” she said, looking up at him again.
“What about your dance partner? Shouldn’t you have been training too?”
“Tolya has already left, so I’m free now.”
As soon as she said it, she bit her lower lip as if she said something she didn’t mean, but she still didn’t leave.
“Hungry? I know a place near where we can get the best hutspot and fried potatoes.”
“I know every inch of this city,” Kaz countered. “You can’t find a better place than mine.”
“Do you want to make a bet?”
“Of course I do.”
“So…,” Inej took time to think. “How about this: If you lose, you come back here tomorrow and start practising with Imogen again.”
How could she know he didn’t want to come back?
“What about you?” Kaz asked.
Inej shrugged. “Name your price, Brekker.”
“As you wish, Ghafa. If you lose, you’ll be my dance partner.”
The girl furrowed her brows. “That’s impossible.”
“Everything is possible for me. Are you afraid of losing?”
“Of course not. Come on, the best hutspot you’ve ever eaten is waiting for you.”
Kaz shook his head in disbelief and followed her through the skylight back into the building, which now seemed abandoned. How long had they sat on the roof? It seemed like a moment, but yet it was two bells. They didn’t even stop to change, and since it was quite a warm day at the end of the summer, they went outside in their training clothes. Kaz didn’t really mind. It was liberating to change his usual suit for something less formal. Maybe no one would recognise him like that.
Inej led him down the street to a fast-food stand. Kaz smirked. There was no way he could lose this bet. And yet he lost because Inej was right. They really made the best hutspot there. Not as good as his mother had used to make, but still the best in the city. They ate sitting on the stone wall in the Fifth Harbour, watching people streaming around, the loading and unloading of goods, ships docking and sailing away. It was Inej who had chosen this place.
“Do you like it here?” he asked.
“Yes. I like the sea and this harbour is… I don’t know how to put it in words. The First and Second Harbour are too fancy, the others just don’t speak to me.”
“And this one speaks to you?” Kaz asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Oh, shut up, Brekker, you’re such a Kerch.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’re the most pragmatic nation in the world,” Inej said with a smile.
She had a really beautiful smile.
“Yes, it’s our strength.”
Inej laughed and Kaz’s body felt warm as if he drank hot chocolate.
“You’re a true Kerch. There are many more things in the world that can’t be understood only pragmatically, and yet they are important.”
“Yeah? I only understand business and numbers. And this harbour is actually mine.”
Inej’s eyes widened. “Are you kidding me?”
“No, I’m not. When I bought it here, it was an abandoned and dirty place.”
“You’re full of surprises.”
When they finished their meal, Inej looked at him with a triumphant smirk.
“You can’t hide how much you love that hutspot, Brekker. You lost.”
“Call me Kaz.”
“Okay. I’m Inej, and don’t try to change the subject. You’ll come to the gym tomorrow and start dancing.”
“What if I still want to change my dance partner?” Kaz brought up.
“I’m the one who won,” Inej remarked with a laugh.
“I know, but I can still make it happen.”
Inej looked at him with narrowed eyes. “The couples have already been chosen and announced. There is nothing you can do about it.”
Kaz grinned. “There is nothing I can’t do. Do you want to bet again?”
The next day, he did come to the gym for dancing, but it wasn’t Imogen waiting for him, but Inej Ghafa in the purple dance top and black leggings, with a long braid and the perfect smile. She tried to find out how he did it, but he never told her this little secret. After all, Kaz Brekker always got what he wanted.