Chapter Text
A vibrant September sun shines its rays through the large panel windows behind the Hokage’s desk. With lazing eyes and a growling stomach, Naruto stares at the mountain of paperwork before him in disbelief.
“It’s like I haven’t made a dent since this morning,” Naruto says to himself and lets out a frustrated sigh.
It’s been less than a year since his inauguration as the village’s Hokage, but he can safely say the administrative component of the position is not exactly his favourite. Sometimes he wonders if Shikamaru fabricates these documents just to torture him. But he can’t complain - although he could do with a little less pencil-pushing, Naruto feels an indescribable sense of pride every day he puts on his robe and steps into his office. He wouldn’t trade this for anything in the world.
“Naruto!”
He hears a familiar voice shout from outside his door as it slams open.
“Hi Sakura,” Naruto says with a careful look.
Sakura walks into the room determinedly, Sai following not far behind.
“And Sai.”
“Hello Naruto,” Sai greets him politely.
“Why do I have five of your clones running around my hospital?!” Sakura starts, putting a stop to the friendly chatter before it can begin.
Naruto scratches the back of his neck and smiles apologetically.
“Oh hah, they’re just helping to organize the new medical supplies we received from Kumogakure yesterday,” Naruto fidgets anxiously.
“Naruto, what did we talk about? I know you’re just trying to help, but you can’t spread yourself so thin like this. I am the Hospital Manager and my staff can take care of supply deliveries just fine on their own. You can’t send out clones to do everything around the village,” Sakura explains sternly.
“I know, I--”
“How many clones do you have active right now?” she interrupts.
Naruto laughs nervously. “Like in total or…?”
“Naruto,” Sakura’s face looks entirely unamused.
“Like 20…”
“Naruto.”
“Ok, 50…”
“Naruto!”
“Ok fine, 112.”
“This is ridiculous!” Sakura says, throwing her hands in the air furiously.
Before he gets a chance to defend the excessive use of shadow clones, Naruto’s stomach churns loudly.
“Ok, that’s it! We’re taking you to lunch,” Sakura decides.
She strides over to Naruto’s desk, grabs him by the wrist and proceeds to drag him to his feet.
“But Sakura, I still have work to do,” Naruto whines as he struggles to free himself from Sakura’s deadly grip. “Sai help me!”
“I’m going to have to take Sakura’s side on this one Naruto,” Sai replies with a caring smile.
“Of course you are,” Naruto relents.
The trio enjoy their meals at a quaint restaurant on the west side of the village. Naruto is admittedly glad his friends forcefully abducted him, otherwise he would’ve likely missed lunch for the third time this week. Maybe this was getting out of hand.
“Naruto, I know you’re the Hokage and I know how much you care about our village. We all do, but you are working yourself too hard,” Sakura starts. “We worry about you.”
“You do look very tired,” Sai offers flatly.
“Thanks Sai,” Naruto replies sarcastically and looks down, choosing to focus on his food.
He knows that keeping dozens of clones active for days is not exactly healthy. He knows the more he drains his chakra like this, the more he’s vulnerable in the event of an emergency. He knows he should eat more, he knows he should sleep more… but things need to get done. The Five Nations are all experiencing a period of transformation right now and he has to stay on top of it. He has to make sure Konoha becomes a welcoming and accepting village for all. Especially for--
“Just promise to stop relying on those energy pills I made for you and actually get some real food in you every once in a while,” Sakura begs, forcing Naruto out of his thoughts.
“I’m sorry to worry you. I’ve just been busy,” Naruto explains. “You know I’m not really good at taking breaks.”
“It seems as though you’re trying to make sure you stay busy,” Sai says, fixing his gaze on Naruto.
Too uncomfortable to hold the stare, Naruto looks down once again. So what if he’s trying to make sure he stays busy? It’s good to be productive. It’s not a distraction. It’s not because drowning in work is the only thing that keeps him from constantly wondering when Sasuke will come back from his months-long mission.
Naruto sighs audibly.
Even if it was… what’s the harm? Naruto has all but given up on his feelings for Sasuke. He knows nothing more than friendship is going to come of their relationship. He’s made his peace with that. He just needs to move on, and if putting in more time at work is going to help, then it’s a win-win for Konoha and himself. Still, he feels tired. The hundred overworked shadow clones are nothing compared to the mental exhaustion of keeping his sexual orientation and feelings for his best friend hidden for almost a decade now. Whether subconsciously or not, these emotions have plagued him for years, and the older Naruto grows, the less interested he becomes in keeping them stowed away.
“Naruto,” Sakura speaks softly. “Is everything ok?”
Naruto inhales deeply.
“Sakura, Sai, I’m gay.”
The table falls into a deafening silence.
“For me?” Sai asks presumptuously.
“Sai!” Sakura elbows him from her seat next to him.
Naruto bursts into laughter, and after almost falling out of his chair from hilarity, he composes himself and settles back into his spot.
“I’m officially offended,” Sai puts down his chopsticks.
“I’m sorry Sai,” Naruto apologizes between chuckles. “Sure you’re attractive, but no. I’ve known for a while now.”
“You have?” Sakura questions. “Why didn’t you tell us? You thought we wouldn’t accept you?”
“Not exactly,” Naruto explains honestly. “It’s just… I’ve always been different, you know. For one reason or another, I was always cast aside. I just… didn’t want another reason. I just want to be normal.”
“Well you’re definitely not normal Naruto,” Sakura teases. “But trust me, that has nothing to do with you being gay. And plus, that’s my favourite thing about you. You’re abnormal in the best ways. Abnormally kind, and brave, and charismatic.”
“And driven,” Sai finishes.
Naruto looks at his friends with glossy eyes.
“Thank you,” he says, a weight lifted off his shoulders. “I knew you’d both understand.”
“Damn right,” Sakura assures him.
Sai nods silently in agreement, and the subtle gesture puts Naruto at ease. The man’s lack of overwhelming emotional response to Naruto’s news makes him feel strangely normal. Like he’s been accepted so unconditionally.
“But… I want to keep this a secret for now,” Naruto looks at them seriously. “Please don’t tell anyone.”
“Oh, of course not,” Sakura nods.
“I mean it Sakura,” Naruto eyes her dubiously. “Not a word to anyone. Not Ino, not Kakashi-sensei. No one.”
“Ok, ok, I got it. You make it seem like all I do is gossip.”
“It’s not?” Sai asks plainly, and for the second time during his lunch hour, Naruto laughs so hard he rocks in his chair uncontrollably.
A hearty punch to Sai’s right shoulder from a scowling Sakura quiets the table once more.
“So is there a someone?” Sakura treads carefully.
“What do you mean?” Naruto asks cluelessly.
“You know… like a special someone,” she presses.
Naruto prepares the last bite of his curry with his chopsticks and looks to Sakura with a confused expression on his face.
“She wants to know if you’re involved in sexual relations with anyone,” Sai translates.
Naruto spits out his food.
“Sai!” Sakura admonishes and elbows him again. At this point, it would take a miracle for Sai to leave the restaurant unbruised.
“What?! No! No. No. There’s no one!” Naruto quickly dismisses the idea, waving his hands around frantically. “Really. There’s no one.”
He settles into his answer. Even if he wanted to tell them about Sasuke, there’d be nothing to tell. Sasuke’s been back in his life for six years since the war, and nothing romantic has happened between them… though not for lack of wishing on Naruto’s part. Naruto’s just happy to have him as a friend again, he can’t risk scaring him away with these feelings. So no, there’s no one. Naruto is moving on.
“But you’re looking?” Sakura continues her interrogation.
“Ummm… yeah,” Naruto replies, feigning confidence. “Yep.”
Naruto is moving on.
Suddenly, a flurry of memories swarms Naruto’s mind, and he gently rubs his left temple to calm the impending headache. He’s back, Naruto realizes, and his eyes widen in surprise.
“Did a clone disappear?” Sai asks.
Naruto rushes to stand up, but his spinning head forces his hands down on the table for balance. He catches a breath and steadies himself, feeling the clone’s exhaustion spread through every inch of his body.
“How long was that one active for?” Sakura probes, not really wanting to know the answer.
“Only a couple of days,” Naruto lies and reaches into his pants pocket. “I’m sorry guys, I have to go back to work. Here’s some…”
“No, don’t worry about it,” Sakura interjects. “Sai’s got this one.”
Sakura grins devilishly at Sai who reluctantly accepts the punishment. Naruto reaches for his Hokage robe, waves goodbye to his friends and leaves the quiet establishment. He reaches the street and allows himself to bask in the familiar chakra drawing closer to the village. No amount of time apart could make Naruto forget this presence - a signature like none he’s ever seen. Sasuke’s home.
Naruto waits impatiently for Sasuke to report from his mission. He scrambles to tidy his office before hearing a sharp knock on the door.
“Come in,” he instructs, rushing to sit back at his desk.
Sasuke’s dressed as though no other colour but black exists. If not for the occasional shift of his parted bangs revealing his Rinnegan, the man would appear entirely monochromatic. Naruto discreetly eyes his friend up and down, searching for new injuries. Slightly torn cloak, scuffed sleeves - seemingly nothing to worry about.
“Sasuke!” Naruto stands excitedly. “Nice of you to report in 3 weeks late.”
Naruto sends a challenging smirk Sasuke’s way.
“I sent you a message telling you I’d be taking a detour through one of the smaller towns near Otogakure,” Sasuke contests defensively.
“And I sent you a message back explicitly asking not to travel through Otogakure.”
“And I didn’t. Like I said, I passed through one of the nearby towns.”
“You know that area is still dangerous.”
“I can handle myself.”
“I know,” Naruto sighs, not looking to start a fight. “I’m just happy you’re back.”
Sasuke appears startled by Naruto’s sincerity.
“Well you’re not going to be so happy when I tell you what I found out,” Sasuke says walking up to Naruto’s desk and slamming down a mission report.
Sasuke gives Naruto a high-level summary of his original mission in Iwagakure. Another success, of course. But he’d heard rumours of unrest in Otogakure and the surrounding areas, so he’d decided to gather first-hand intel during his trip back home.
“But the Shinobi Alliance couldn’t be stronger right now,” Naruto says.
“And that’s exactly what’s troubling the smaller countries. The Five Nations are in control of substantial military power. If they were to work together, they could monopolize natural resources, colonize new areas…” Sasuke explains.
“We’re not planning to do any of that,” Naruto scowls.
“The smaller countries don’t know that, and they likely wouldn’t believe it anyways,” Sasuke continues. “In any case, I didn’t find concrete evidence to prove it, but a team of mercenaries seems to be assembling in Otogakure, and you and the other Kage are in their sights.”
Sasuke’s fists clench at the thought.
“You need to officially assign me on a mission to investigate so I can try to handle this with the Otogakure government as diplomatically as possible,” Sasuke demands.
“Absolutely not. You just got back from a 7-month mission, and if this involves the other Kage, it’s not exactly a call we should be making on our own.”
“Naruto, there are shinobi after you!” Sasuke says incredulously.
“I can handle myself,” Naruto quips.
Sasuke rolls his eyes.
“Can you?” Sasuke challenges. “When’s the last time you were actually in combat?”
“Hey! I still train bastard,” Naruto replies, quickly aggravated.
“Then you wouldn’t have a problem sparring with me after work tonight?”
“Of course not, I’ll kick your ass!”
Sasuke smiles watching Naruto get riled up.
“What are you looking so happy about?” Naruto questions Sasuke humorously.
Naruto hates how much Sasuke’s smile affects him. The man’s barely written him over the last few months and all it takes is a smile for Naruto to forget how much that had stung. But Sasuke’s smiles are so rare, he can’t help but feel special when they’re directed towards him.
“Naruto!” Shikamaru slams his office door wide open. “Where is the Anbu rotation schedule for next month? You were supposed to get that done last week and--”
Shikamaru stops his tirade when he notices an unexpected visitor.
“Sasuke… sorry, I didn’t know you were back. Good to see you,” Shikamaru says and Sasuke nods in agreement.
“I’ll get it done right now,” Naruto rifles through his files to find the scheduling form in question.
“No you won’t, because we have a meeting with the Education Board Committee in 5 minutes… or did you forget that too?” Shikamaru scolds.
“Shit! Ok, let me find my notes,” Naruto responds.
“I’m surprised you prepared notes.”
“What do you think I use my shadow clones for?”
“Apparently not for the Anbu rotation schedule,” Shikamaru remarks. “But yeah, I’ve noticed more of them than usual running around.”
“Sakura’s going to yell at you for that,” Sasuke butts in.
“She already has, don’t remind me.”
“We’ve got to go Naruto,” Shikamaru implores.
“Ok, ok, ” Naruto says hurrying out of the room. “Sasuke! Third Training Ground at 7.”
Naruto and Shikamaru rush through the hallways of the Hokage Tower, but Sasuke lingers in Naruto’s office for a moment longer. He’s still not entirely used to Naruto being the Hokage. Sometimes he just sees that obnoxious 12-year-old again and all he wants to do is hold on to the memory - the memory of a time before things were so complicated. Before he abandoned his village, before he became a criminal… before he hurt Naruto.
Sasuke winces at that last thought and decides to make his way home. His new neighbourhood in the southern district of Konoha is quiet and peaceful, which Sasuke is extremely grateful for. He’d been offered sole rights to the Uchiha Compound by Naruto - one of his earliest mandates in fact - but Sasuke had rejected the proposal in favour of letting the land be used to expand the village. The Uchiha name shouldn’t be secluded to the outskirts of Konoha anymore, Sasuke thought, and Naruto could not have agreed more. But in the busier parts of the village, he still sometimes notices unwelcoming stares. Though usually from older residents who had long ago formed unyielding opinions about his clan.
He lets himself into his modest house, everything exactly as he left it, and he can’t help how impatient he feels to see Naruto again in just a few hours. He’s missed him.
Sasuke waits at the Third Training Ground for his opponent to arrive. He’s dressed more casually than before, sporting black pants and a tight long-sleeve navy shirt.
“So you actually showed up?” Sasuke teases as Naruto enters the fenced-in area.
“Of course I did! Last chance for you to back out if you want though. I’m sure you’re tired from travelling,” Naruto smirks.
“I’ll take it easy on you. You’ve been at your desk all day,” Sasuke replies, stretching his left arm.
Naruto cracks his knuckles. “Don’t do me any favours.”
Naruto sprints determinedly, leaps into the air and sends a forceful kick down on his competition. Sasuke expertly shields his face against the strike by crossing his forearms. Naruto springs off them and flips backwards. Sasuke unsheathes his katana swiftly and takes a swing at Naruto, who barely dodges it as he lands. The blond launches three unsteady shuriken, entirely missing his target, and Sasuke doesn’t miss the opportunity to take a jab at Naruto.
“Nice aim,” Sasuke’s voice dripping with sarcasm.
“Bastard!” Naruto curses, pulling out a chipped kunai.
Naruto and Sasuke continue to spar, and Sasuke begins to worry as he effortlessly gains ground. Naruto’s reflexes are slow, his punches don’t pack their usual strength and his defence is nonexistent. The blond seems winded and Sasuke stops attacking.
“You’re out of shape,” Sasuke accuses.
“Shut up and just fight!” Naruto demands.
Sasuke reluctantly hurls two kunai in Naruto’s direction. Should be an easy dodge, he thinks. But Naruto suddenly buckles to his knees and one of the blades slashes his right shoulder.
“Naruto!” Sasuke shoots his teammate a look of concern and hurries to his side.
“I’m fine Sasuke,” Naruto says, attempting to stand up while pressing tightly on his wound, but quickly toppling over once again. Sasuke reaches out to steady him.
“What was that?” Sasuke asks harshly.
Naruto grunts in pain.
“Nothing. One of my shadow clones just disappeared, it’s nothing.”
“Naruto you look exhausted. Your aim is terrible, your chakra is weak--”
“Is that why you wanted to spar?” Naruto interrupts. “So you could insult me?”
“No, but you’re off your game. There are shinobi rallying to come after you and you can barely keep up with my taijutsu.”
“I would’ve tried harder if this was a real fight.”
“That’s not the point. If you refuse to send me to Otogakure to neutralize this threat, then I’m staying in Konoha to help you train.”
“I don’t need help,” Naruto waves his arms violently as if to prove a point, but quickly kneels back down from the pain in his shoulder.
“Stop moving so much you idiot,” Sasuke reaches into his compact supplies pouch. “Let me wrap that up.”
Naruto squirms in response.
“Or I can tell Sakura about it, your call,” Sasuke threatens.
Naruto sighs and lets Sasuke wrap a bandage firmly around his arm.
“This is nothing, ok? Kurama will have this fixed up in no time,” Naruto assures him, and he feels Kurama stir. “I don’t need you worrying about this, I’ve just been putting in a few extra hours at work so I’m a bit worn out.”
“Yeah, now multiply those few extra hours by however many clones you have running around.”
“I’m fine.”
But Naruto doesn’t feel fine. Every time a clone disappears it’s like he’s getting the wind knocked out of him and his head pummelled at the same time. His oldest clone has been active for almost three weeks and he knows that’s stepping into severe chakra-depletion territory.
“You are not fine,” Sasuke insists, crossing his arms and looking intently at Naruto. “Deactivate your clones Naruto. I know you’re trying to protect the village but leaving yourself in this weakened state is not the way to do that.”
Naruto sighs once again and finally stands up.
“Fine. I’ll deactivate them tomorrow.”
“All of them,” Sasuke says, looking at Naruto with a serious expression indicating no leniency.
“Fine!” Naruto promises.
“Good. Now let’s go, I’ll walk you home,” Sasuke offers and starts heading out of the open field.
“I’m not a kid you bastard, I can make it home on my own,” Naruto retorts, but joins Sasuke at his side anyways.
The pair leave the Third Training Ground and walk along the lively Konoha streets in a quiet stride. Despite Naruto’s hyper-vocal nature, a substantial amount of his time with Sasuke is spent in comfortable silence. Naruto finally allows himself to feel how much he’s missed his best friend over the last seven months. Being around Sasuke, sparring with him, talking to him… it’s intoxicating, and Naruto feels a familiar trickle of hope flood his heart. Maybe things would be different this time, maybe things would change.
“Naruto, Sasuke,” Kakashi says, slowly approaching them.
Naruto had been so deep in thought he hadn’t noticed their sensei walking right towards them.
“I didn’t know you were back Sasuke.”
“Just got in this afternoon.”
“Back for only a few hours and you two are already fighting?” Kakashi asks, looking over at Naruto’s bandaged shoulder.
“It was a friendly spar,” Sasuke replies.
“You two really haven’t changed, have you?” Kakashi wonders aloud.
He’s right, Naruto thinks. And just like that the inkling of hope he’d felt moments ago fades rapidly into oblivion. Kakashi-sensei is right! They haven’t changed. It’s been almost six years since the war, six years since Sasuke came back into Naruto’s life and nothing has changed. He can’t possibly tell Sasuke how he feels. He spent so long fighting to get Sasuke back, he can’t risk losing his friend again over something like this. This could damage… no… end their friendship. These feelings that Sasuke has shown no sign of returning are useless. Naruto is moving on.
“I’ve got to get home,” Naruto speaks suddenly.
“Naruto--” Sasuke starts but Naruto doesn’t let him finish.
“My house is just a few blocks away Sasuke, I’m fine. I’ll see you soon,” Naruto says, sporting an uncharacteristically stoic expression. “Bye Kakashi-sensei.”
Naruto walks off hurriedly and Kakashi sends Sasuke a blank stare.
“Everything ok with him?” Kakashi asks.
“Hn,” is all Sasuke manages.
“He’s been working even harder than usual since he became Hokage. Sakura tells me he’s not eating or sleeping well, but you know he doesn’t listen to us,” Kakashi says.
“You say that like he listens to me,” Sasuke replies.
“He needs you Sasuke. Why don’t you stay a while?”
“Why do I get stuck watching over the idiot?”
“You are his friend, aren’t you?” Kakashi asks knowingly, hoping to strike a chord.
Friend. Sasuke almost scowls at the word. His rampaging emotions detest the sound of it. Friend feels so diminutive. That word can’t possibly describe how he feels about Naruto. It makes their relationship seems so trivial, when it’s anything but. His relationship with Naruto is… everything. Which is why he can’t ruin it, Sasuke reminds himself. He can’t tell Naruto how he feels. He can’t risk losing the single most important person in his life.
“I’ll keep an eye on him,” Sasuke sighs as if burdened by the thought.
“I know you will,” Kakashi sends him a gentle smile only detectable by the narrowing of his eyes above his mask and walks away.
Sasuke makes his way home through the evening dark, thinking about how much brighter his walk would be with a certain blond by his side.
Naruto opens his front door and rushes inside, craving the peaceful emptiness of his home. He strips from his clothes and jumps into the shower, carefully removing the bandages from his injured shoulder. The wound is no longer bleeding and Naruto lets the warm running water soothe away some of the pain.
Sasuke is his best friend, Naruto thinks to himself. To jeopardize their friendship after so many years struggling to rebuild it would be devastating. Sasuke’s not gay, and even if he was, Naruto’s sure he wouldn’t be at the top of his list. The bastard barely tolerates him, he thinks. Nothing’s ever going to change, and Naruto can’t spend the rest of his life hanging on to a frayed thread of hope.
He reflects on his earlier conversation with Sakura and Sai, and decides he’s putting his foot down. Naruto Uzumaki is officially looking for a partner! Well… not actually officially. In fact, quite the opposite. Naruto Uzumaki is secretly looking for a partner, he internally rephrases. He’s not exactly ready to come out to everyone, especially not Sasuke. Naruto becomes increasingly anxious just at the thought. Sasuke would think of him differently, maybe even feel uncomfortable around him, and that’s just not something Naruto wants to worry about right now.
Naruto pats himself dry and brushes his teeth before heading to bed. He can still feel Sasuke’s chakra despite being several streets apart, and the comforting feeling quickly puts Naruto to sleep.