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"YOU STUPID IDIOT!!" by 1trickpony
Fandoms: Fantastic Four (Comicverse), Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man (Comicverse), Marvel (Comics)
09 Jun 2014
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Summary
Johnny and Peter find each other at the same party and it all goes to hell from there. And very soon Peter finds out just how annoying Johnny Storm can be.
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“Yeah, but he invited superheroes.” He says the last bit mockingly. “No one knows you're you-know-who.”Peter pulls out this tiny, really expensive looking camera out of his side pocket (no doubt one of Stark's technologies). “You see, Storm, when people ask, I'm just the guy here for good press.” The smile on his face was so self-righteous Johnny wanted to punch him in it. But in a loving way, of course.
“Or just the really goofy guy who doesn't know how to dress for these kind of occasions,” Johnny retorts with his own little self-righteous smile that made Peter's fade to dust.
“I am human you know,” Peter tells him, shooting him this blank stare. “I have feelings."
“Not with that outfit you don't.” Johnny smooths it over with a wink, downs his glass of champagne and practically throws it onto one of the trays whizzing by.
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Bookmark Notes:
彼得叹了口气，弯下腰，又在其中一个敞开的底柜里翻找，“我知道我在这附近有罐头食品——我只是不知道——啊，它来了！！
约翰尼的脸融化了，倒在地上。“就这样？豆罐头？你他妈是在跟我开玩笑吧？
所有这些柜子和他发现的实际上可以食用的都是一罐豆子？在他看来，他看起来像谁，威胁丹尼斯？他到底要用豆子做什么？他真的应该再次打开那个罐子柜来报复他，因为这太不公平了。
彼得害羞地揉了揉脖子，“嗯......这就是我所拥有的一切...要么是这个，要么是你把那个肉饼从那个墙上刮下来——”
罐头从他手里抢走了。“开罐器在哪里？”约翰尼急切地问道，把豆罐子在手掌里滚来滚去。
彼得转移了体重，紧张地笑了笑，挠了挠腰。
“莱姆猜，你也不知道那是什么地方。”
“我知道就在这附近——”
“什么鬼，皮特！”约翰尼距离把罐子狠狠地砸在头上还有两秒钟。他觉得自己的肚子咕咕叫，他掀起衬衫，拍了拍肌肉，“没关系，伙计。我知道你饿了。如果事情变得绝望，如果有必要，我们会吃掉彼得。
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