midtrains



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  1. Public Bookmark 82

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    He wants to tell Rozanov to get overhimself, shut up and fuck off. In that order. What he does say is, “I—I want to, uh…to try something.”

    “Tell me,” Rozanov says, drawing back a little. His hands are back on Shane’s body and he slips his fingers under the hem of his shirt to draw his fingertips over Shane’s abs.

    Shane takes a deep breath. Here goes nothing. “I want to suck you off upside down.”

    Shane braces his palms on the counter top of the kitchen island Rozanov has trapped him against and hoists himself up, then spins and lies down on his back, shuffling a little until he feels the edge of the counter hit the back of his neck. He looks up at Rozanov towering over him like this, and the zing of arousal that zips through him is so strong it makes his skin tingle and heat pour through his veins, pooling between his legs.

    OR; Shane sees porn that he wants to try with Rozanov.

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    05 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Rozanov made a dismissive noise. “No, no, I will pick you up. Send me your address.”

    “I’m not giving you my home address.”

    “Why not!”

    “Because you’ll probably post it on social media to psych me out before our next game.”

    That made Rozanov laugh. “It is good idea,” he said. Stopped laughing. Started again. Blew out a breath like he had to get himself together. “I might do this to you,” he allowed, “but you have nice boyfriend living with you now. I would not do this to him. You are safe.”

     

    In which Ilya Rozanov adopts himself into Scott and Kip's household and refuses to leave. Kip finds this very sweet. Scott is going to kill him.

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    05 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    He can’t tell Ilya though. He can’t tell Ilya that his team might not be right for Shane. That this perfect solution is making Shane a worse hockey player, a bad teammate.

    That maybe Shane Hollander of the Voyagers really was his full name. That Shane Hollander of the Centaurs might not exist.

    He can’t say that. He can’t ruin everything. He can’t dim the shine in Ilya’s eyes, the bounce in his step, the color in his cheeks he didn’t have the last few years.

    Ilya sacrificed hockey for their relationship for two years, played on a crappy team and watched Shane win. It’s Shane’s turn to sacrifice, to figure out how to make this work and let Ilya lead this time.

    Or:

    Transitions are hard for Shane. Joining his husband's team turns out not to be an exception to that rule.

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    05 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Again, Ilya feels the shame flare in his belly. He imagines his father across the counter from them, watching this unfold. Watching Ilya be babied by his fucking boyfriend over an injury. He remembered how he’d yell at his mother for babying Ilya, the word soft being thrown around a lot.

    But Ilya likes being babied. He likes watching Shane fuss and frown as he portions out the pills, filling a glass with Ilya’s favorite juice to wash them down with, then bustling up and back down the stairs with Ilya’s favorite pillow and the sleep mask he keeps in his travel bag for planes and hotels.

    He is soft. Weak too, probably. His father’s voice spits through his thoughts, sharp and disgusted. Ilya feels them settle on his shoulders, tug at his spine.

    “You okay?” Shane asks, hair messy from the shower, Ilya’s pillow against his chest.

    His father’s voice fades.

    “Yes, moya lyubov. I am okay.”

    -
    Or, a shoulder injury takes Ilya out for the season ten games into his second year with the Ottawa Centaurs. With one good arm and an empty house, Ilya battles with memories of his parents and his mental health.

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    05 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    The room moves around him, nurses in and out to check on his progress and remove his IV. A new doctor comes in with discharge papers, instructions about PT that Hollander studiously writes down. Ilya lets himself be moved and nods when it seems appropriate. But he hears none of it. The blood rushes through his ears and one word echoes in his chest over and over again. Husband.

    In 2025, Ilya suffers a hit on the ice and wakes up in the hospital. Shane Hollander is there, holding his hand. But the last thing Ilya remembers is a tuna melt (aaaaaaand Rose Landry).

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    03 Jul 2026