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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “Sorry, Yoshiki,” Hikaru groans as tears come out of one eye and more of him comes out of the other. “Ughh, I don’t – ”

    Yoshiki can see how hard he’s trying to calm himself down, but it just isn’t working.

    “It’s ok,” Yoshiki says, quiet. “It’s ok. Instead of shovin’ it back inside completely, can you try just...lettin’ it out? Just a little bit?”

    He has no clue how any of this works, but maybe a half-measure is better than trying to force it all at once.

    “Okay,” Hikaru says, but it sounds like a sob. More of the unknowable, incomprehensible swirl leaks out into the dark room.

    “Yoshiki – shit – ‘m sorry but can I…” Hikaru’s face – what’s visible behind the bloom of him – twists in a small kind of agony. “Can I touch you? Not much. Just – ”

    It's been years since Hikaru first took the body of Yoshiki's dead best friend. Despite everything - every horror and hurt - they managed to find a home in each other. Not quite friends or family. More and not. What they have is complicated, but precious.

    But when Yoshiki escapes their small town – to college, to Tokyo – Hikaru follows. And things start to change for them both.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    105,835
    Chapters:
    23/23
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    3
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    12 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    fucking hell this was phenomenal

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya posts a casual video of himself covered in a necklace of hickeys given to him by his beautiful, freaky boyfriend. In an unfortunate turn of events, girls all over the world join forces to share the details and video evidence of their own sexual exploits with Russia’s pass-around party boy. Shane is not at all consumed by jealousy and absolutely does not fall into a spiral of competitive obsession over these events.

    Or, 5 times Shane tries to be as good as every girl that Ilya’s ever been with, + 1 time Ilya shows him that he has always been better.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,234
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    317
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    02 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    forgive me lord i have sinned this was so horny i got goosebumps bravo

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shrugging one shoulder far more casually than he possibly feels, Ilya says, “I like both. Is secret, okay?”

    “Okay,” Hollander says, voice cracking.

    He doesn’t say anything else. The air’s so heavy around them that it feels like being in the middle of a scrum, the weight and heat of all those bodies pressing down on you. Danger always feels like hockey; it’s the most dangerous thing Ilya knows, except for this. Everything dangerous in his life involves men’s bodies and just how close he can get to them. Closer than he probably should.

    A year after mysteriously dropping out of the 2009 draft, Shane Hollander is signed by the Boston Raiders, right behind Ilya Rozanov. Having the two biggest stars in the league on the same line is great for Boston — but playing alongside their worst rival was never exactly in Shane or Ilya's plans. Especially not when staying away from each other starts to feel just as impossible as getting along.

    Series
    Language:
    English
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    222,222
    Chapters:
    28/28
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    17,173
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    42,468
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    01 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    im sick im u well this was unreal they are in love they are so in love they would be in love in all universes in all times they are that in love

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    ...I guess I should just say it. I was wondering if you'd—”

    “I think we should stop seeing each other.”

    “—like to come to my cottage this summer.”

    The plate slips from Shane's hand and shatters on the kitchen floor.

    Or: Shane doesn't get injured that night Montreal plays Boston. Ilya follows through on his plan to break things off with him. Well, he tries, at least.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,225
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    732
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    26 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    god damn sensational

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    While trying to write to his friend studying abroad in Moscow, Shane Hollander accidentally reaches Ilya Rozanov.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,660
    Chapters:
    10/10
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    9,137
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    25 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    I cried at these god damn letters