UnderneathAllTheSecrets



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    ...oh,” his mom says. “Oh, honey, you were seeing someone? You never said anything.”

    “It’s-it’s complicated.” He catches the present tense too fucking late to do anything about it, and he barely resists the urge to either groan or slip forward to start beating his head against the coffee table.

    Fuck his fucking life.

    “You’re still…seeing this person?” His mom asks, and the amount of control he can hear her exerting is almost painful. “Who is-”

    “Yuna,” his dad cuts in, voice quiet, “maybe give him a second, yeah?”

    Yeah, Shane agrees in his head. Give him a second.

    Maybe give him a decade while they’re at it.

    (when shane's old fake id falls out of his wallet around his parents, he has to explain that it was to book hotel rooms before he was 21)

    (...and then he has to explain why he needed to book those hotel rooms in the first place)

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    12 Jun 2026

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    Shane Hollander is a man who thrives on structure, routine, the solid ground of a ten-year plan. Ilya likes that about him, likes the embracing squeeze of having a life organized in tandem with Shane.

    No one would call Ilya a man who thrives on structure. But it’s there, if not in his DNA then in the patterns of his brain. A call-and-response of: they do this, I do that.

    When Ilya’s life is flayed open for the world to dissect, how will they push-and-pull their way back towards what was once a well-organized life?


    “I thought we could go through the schedules and figure out what days we’ll be in the same cities this season, or when either of us have a couple of days off in a row. Maybe make a shared calendar, so we c—”

    “A sex calendar? Your parents are arriving in thirty minutes, and you are proposing making a sex calendar?” Oh, this was delicious. He’d be able to eat out on this for years, if Shane was willing to give him that long.

    “It’s not a sex calendar! It’s just … when we might be able to see each other,” he finished, already sounding defeated.

    “And what are you planning on doing when we are seeing each other? Not fucking?”

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    10 Jun 2026

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    Ilya widens his eyes, moves his hands in an impatient “get on with it” motion. He has the urge to say it for him, end both their misery. Shane blinks rapidly a few times, takes another deep breath. “I want to stop,” he says simply.

    Ilya lets out one humorless laugh, “Stop what?”

    Shane ignores him. “At the All Star Game, I told you I liked you. And you said about Russia and your family. And I looked some things up. I get it. I get it better now. I know we can’t but I can’t stop wanting to be…more. Unless we stop.”

    OR

    Shane just wants to be friends and Ilya is, like, fine with that or whatever

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    06 Jun 2026

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    Post-cottage, Shane and Ilya quickly discover that hiding sucks, so they launch their friendship via a series of chaotic Instagram Lives. It predictably spirals out of control.

    Ch 1: Friends!
    Ch 2: …Uh, friends?
    Ch 3: Definitely not friends.

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    03 Jun 2026

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    "Hi, solnyshko.”
    The Russian pet name set a firework off inside Shane's mind as he heard it cooed from behind him. The intonation was just as he remembered, but the voice was much deeper.

    He turned and felt himself short circuit. It took every ounce of willpower to not let his jaw drop cartoonishly to the floor. Shane would recognize his individual features anywhere, even after 5 years. But it was as if someone had snapped their fingers and the smug, silly Russian boy who had been attached to Shane's hip for 3 summers was transformed into some sort of fucking Adonis right before his eyes.

    “Ilya-” was all Shane managed before strong arms were wrapped around his waist and lifting him off the ground in a greeting all too familiar from years ago.

     

    OR
    When Shane Hollander & Ilya Rozanov spent their summers as teens in an elite hockey camp, they quickly became inseparable friends. But they lose touch when Shane moves on as a prospect for the NHL and Ilya for the KHL.

    Years later, Montreal makes a bold move to take the hottest player in the KHL. After hearing of the Russian's reputation, the Montreal Captain is tasked with keeping his old best friend and new teammate out of trouble.

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    02 Jun 2026