Chapter Text
Present
Bradley glances at his watch again and sighs.
Jake was supposed to be home hours ago from his meeting with Cyclone. He would’ve that Jake would be rushing to get back since he was the one insisting that they needed to talk.
He stares at all the cabinets he still needs to install and debates if he should just attempt it himself. Given the fact that he only just barely managed to not break one of them when he tried an hour ago, that doesn’t feel like a wise decision. Jake would never let him live it down if they had to wait even more time to finish the kitchen. This is very clearly a two-person job. Well, it might be a one-person job for Jake, but he knew he couldn’t do it alone.
So Bradley continues to sit on the ground staring at his unfinished kitchen. He’s starting to see Jake’s vision though. He thinks his mom would like it too. She’d probably be mad it took him this long to make the place his own, even if every inch of it has been influenced by Jake now.
He double checks his phone to make sure he hadn’t accidentally missed a message, but there’s still nothing from Jake.
Bradley’s stomach growls loudly. Jake was going to bring food home after his meeting too. Bradley truly can’t wait until he has a kitchen again and can cook. Right now, they’re surviving on take out until they can get the cabinets up and the new appliances arrive.
A buzz in his pocket startles him. Bradley quickly looks at it, but it’s just Phoenix responding to the latest message in their Dagger group chat. Bradley decides he’ll call once; Jake will just ignore it if he’s still doing work things.
It rings and rings and rings until he finally gets Jake’s voicemail. “Jake Seresin. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you.”
Jake’s had the same voicemail since they were at Top Gun together the first time. His voice is free from some of the perils of adulthood that Bradley knows he’s been through now. There’s something about having a mini time capsule to that time that makes Bradley smile every single time. Or it did until he would inevitably remember everything that happened, but thankfully they’ve mostly moved past that now.
He wonders how he’ll feel about it a couple of months from now.
Bradley orders from their favorite pizza place. He’ll get the usual and they can put the leftovers in the mini-fridge they’re using if Jake ends up bringing food home too. Nothing wrong with some cold pizza.
They’re down to just the kitchen and the bedrooms in their renovations, and it hits Bradley like the house coming down around him that Jake probably won’t even be here when it’s finished.
He doesn’t want to be bitter. He’s happy for Jake. Jake deserves this. Honestly, he knew this day would come too. Because this is how it is.
Jake’s destined for greatness and Bradley is destined to be left. It’s just the way things are.
---
Top Gun, The First Time
It’s only their second week at Top Gun and Bradley knows one thing. He absolutely cannot stand Jake Seresin.
And no, it’s not because he goes weak in the knees when Jake directs a smirk in his direction. (Something he’s doing with increasing frequency). Bradley duly ignores Natasha every time she points it out. They’ve all only known each other for a couple of weeks, she shouldn’t be able to read him that well. There’s no way he’s being that obvious.
It’s not the competition either. Even though Bradley isn’t sure the last time he felt this passionate about something. He knows the answer to that, and it’s been driving his entire career, but he has it locked firmly in a box in the back of his mind which he doesn’t think about.
There are things that Bradley is willing to think about and to embrace and there are things that he isn’t. Everything about Seresin falls into the ‘isn’t’ category, but damn it, does he get under his skin.
It’d be better if Seresin wasn’t the best one here. He knows it too. Makes him insufferable. The arrogance works for Bradley though. He’s only allowing Natasha to drag him out tonight because he knows he might get to see Jake.
The night is already in full swing when they arrive. Bradley trails behind Natasha as he makes her way through the crowd, but his height gives him the advantage of being able to see over most people. He immediately spots Jake and Javy near the pool table in the back corner. Jake turns and smirks at him right away, almost like he could sense the fact that Bradley was looking at him.
Jake says something quickly to Javy who rolls his eyes and laughs before making his way to him and Nat. Jake is either oblivious to (Bradley highly doubts it’s that) or purposefully ignoring all the interested gazes he draws.
“Bradshaw. Trace. You’re both looking good tonight.”
“Save it, Seresin,” Natasha replies, roughly pats his shoulder as she passes by to meet Javy at the bar. Jake laughs but keeps his focus on Bradley.
“Not going to tell me I look good too?” Jake asks.
“I don’t need to make your ego any bigger,” Bradley teases.
“That’s unfortunate.”
Bradley knows it’s bait, but he can’t resist taking it. “Why’s that?”
“I was really looking for someone new to play at pool, but I guess you’re just not my competition.”
The thought rankles Bradley. He wants to be the one challenging for the best. He knows he can despite what anyone else might think.
“I’m in, just let me grab a drink first.”
Jake follows him over to the bar to grab himself another round.
“Found your new foe?” Javy asks.
“Not sure how much of a foe he’ll be,” Jake replies, an old hand when it comes to shit-talking his competition.
“You have no idea how good I could be. Might be the best you’ve ever played.” Bradley is full of bravado. He’s played maybe a handful of games of pool in his life, but he’s not going to let Jake know that.
Natasha and Javy exchange knowing glances.
“Please go play your game so I don’t have to suffer your male egos anymore,” Natasha says as she waves them towards the pool table.
Jake quickly racks the balls and Bradley watches him break. “So what are we playing for?”
Jake sinks a shot, pauses to look Bradley up and down before he moves around the table to pocket another ball. He glances up at Bradley, “What do you want?”
Bradley knows this moment could tip the scales between them, bring them into new territory. But something makes him hesitate.
It’s not even like it would have to be something serious, but he still can’t bring himself to say what he wants.
A ball bounces off the edge of the pocket and Jake passes the pool cue over. “Wait too long and you’ll miss your shot. Not going to do very well if you can’t even take a shot.”
Bradley bristles at the subtext. If there’s one thing he’s figured out about Seresin, it’ll all always come back to being the best pilot. He lines up his first shot and thankfully sinks it, but the second is a terrible miss.
“Definitely not the best I’ve ever played.”
Jake wins the game handily before Bradley can even finish his beer. Jake walks over to him, getting far closer than necessary, and snags the beer from his loose grip to drink the rest of it. Bradley can’t look away from the length of Jake’s throat as he swallows.
“Well, that was certainly something, but I think I’m going to take off,” Seresin pauses, gives Bradley another once-over, but doesn’t say anything else.
Jake starts to walk away, and Bradley calls out to him, “We never decided what you’d win.”
“I had something in mind, but I only hook up with worthwhile competition.” Jake turns and makes his way over to Javy before Bradley can even open his mouth to respond. He watches Jake say something that makes Javy laugh heartily and can’t help but wonder what it’s like to get the version of Seresin that Javy does, the one that isn’t nearly as arrogant as he is with him and Natasha. If Jake wasn’t his exact type, his life would be much easier.
Bradley stays locked in on Jake as he heads towards the exit, but Jake doesn’t turn to look at him. Bradley sighs, considers it a lost cause until he sees Javy staring at him. Javy raises his eyebrows in disbelief and glances purposely at the door.
Well, clearly Javy thinks Bradley has a shot he can still take. He quickly exits the bar and finds Jake standing on the curb looking up at the stars waiting for his ride. Bradley’s done hesitating tonight. He walks right up to Jake, takes his face in his hands and kisses him. Jake immediately responds, giving as good as he gets.
Bradley is completely lost in the moment until he hears someone yell from a car, “Jake?”
He reluctantly pulls back and has to resist the urge to dive back in when he sees how Jake is staring at him, but he’s made his move now.
“Trust me. I’m competition.” Bradley turns to head back into the bar.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Jake grabs his hand and pulls him into the Uber.
Things continue like that for a while. They show up somewhere, push each other’s buttons, find somewhere to fuck each other’s brains out, and then one of them goes home.
Bradley likes the banter and he loves the sex, but he’s starting to think he wouldn’t mind seeing more of Jake outside of that context too. He’s fun and he pushes Bradley. He’s smart too. And so cocky. And Bradley can’t get enough.
They never go any deeper though. Not until Father’s Day weekend. Bradley always shuts himself away on holidays like this if he can. Avoiding everyone as much as possible in order to forgo any of the inevitable questions that he’s sure will come his way regarding what he’s doing with his family.
So he definitely isn’t expecting Jake to knock on his door midway through the day.
Bradley’s dressed in his worst sweats, hair uncombed, as disheveled as he possibly can be, but Jake still smiles when he sees him open the door.
“Can I come in?” Jake asks. He barely waits a second for Bradley to nod before he’s pushing him back into his place, tugging at his shirt as he goes.
Afterwards, they’re still lying in bed, but there’s space separating them, enough that he can only barely feel Jake’s body heat. Bradley can’t help but wonder why Jake’s free today. He knows he’s mentioned his parents before and in a positive manner, and he knows they’re alive, but it doesn’t explain why he’s the only other one from their cohort that’s not with their families. Especially when Jake showing up here had an edge of desperation, a desire to forget that Bradley is all too familiar with.
Bradley stares at the ceiling and tries to let his curiosity go, but his mom had always said his penchant to learn things was unmatched. He would always bother her until she explained whatever she had been doing and had made her walk him through every recipe she cooked just so he could understand. Now, he’s glad he did though so that he could still have those pieces of his mom with him.
It’s that thought that propels him to roll onto his side and prop his head on an elbow so he can look at Jake.
Jake opens one eye to glance at him. “Yes?”
“Everyone else is spending today with their families,” Bradley says tentatively.
“That’s not a question, Bradshaw,” Jake sighs.
“Just wondering why you’re not. From what you’ve said before, it seemed like you had a good relationship with your family?” Bradley pushes. He’s not sure why, but he wants to know what made Jake show up on his doorstep today.
“I called my dad earlier, talked to him for a bit, but then he had to work,” Jake shrugs.
He throws an arm over his eyes and doesn’t move again.
Bradley assumes that’s all he’s getting so he flops back onto his back. He’s just about to offer Jake a snack or something, anything to break the silence when Jake continues, “I would’ve love to spend the day with my family, but that was never going to happen.”
Bradley hums noncommittally, not wanting to scare Jake into stopping.
“They’re too- well- it’s just-“ Jake sighs heavily, clearly changes from whatever he had been about to say, “I know my dad is proud of me. This is so far out of my parents’ wildest dreams for me.”
Bradley scoffs jokingly, “I can’t imagine that you didn’t make incredibly obvious to your parents how great you were going to be.”
Jake turns to smile at Bradley, meeting his gaze for the first time since Bradley brought up his family for a moment before turning away again. “You can bet on that.”
Bradley can tell Jake is keeping his expression carefully neutral. After a long moment, Jake takes a deep breath and continues, “They’ve never left Texas though, so all of this is a huge deal to them. My dad was thrilled to hear I’m top of the class right now.”
“Makes sense,” Bradley says softly.
“I always knew I’d be here. I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.”
Jake rolls onto his side so he can dig his phone out of his pants from where they lay next to the bed. It’s clear that he’s not going to continue the conversation. Bradley knows better than anyone that talking about your family can be complicated. Jake seems like he has a good loving family who’s all alive. Bradley can’t even remember having that.
“If we’re doing family sharing time, why aren’t you with yours? Nobody knows anything about the Bradshaws,” Jake teases pointedly.
Bradley didn’t fathom Jake being curious too and is unprepared with his normal spiel about his life. It’s going to have to be the direct approach.
“My parents are dead,” Bradley states.
Jake’s mouth drops in surprise, but Bradley cuts him off before he can apologize like everyone always does, “My dad died when I was young, my mom when I was teenager. I stayed with a family friend until college, but don’t talk to them anymore.”
He knows he’s skirting the truth, but he can’t bear to touch that wound right now. He doesn’t want to think about the fact that he’s only here with Jake because Mav fucked him over. He should’ve been years ahead already. He should’ve never met Jake. At least not for years and years.
Jake opens his mouth several times to say something. Bradley pleads with the gods he doesn’t believe in that Jake won’t engage in the normal platitudes that everyone always does. He doesn’t have it in him to deal with that level of pity right now.
“Well, it was convenient for me that you were free,” Jake rolls in his direction and gives him a pointed once-over.
Bradley scoots closer to press his body against Jake’s again when Jake continues softly, “It’s nice to not be alone on these types of days.”
Bradley doesn’t know why Jake isn’t with his family today, but for Jake’s sake he wishes he was. He doesn’t control that, but he can help Jake feel less alone right now. He pushes Jake back and moves on top of him to press a heated kiss to his lips. All talk of families is quickly forgotten.
--
Top Gun, Again
It’s a gorgeous day in San Diego and Bradley feels good.
He got the call to come back to Top Gun for some secret assignment and it just confirms what he knows, he’s one of the best.
He loves what he does, and he loves being good at it. Knowing he’s likely to be paired up against the rest of the best just pushes him even more.
Bradley saunters into the Hard Deck and doesn’t bother taking his sunglasses off.
It doesn’t take long before he hears Phoenix call out, “Bradshaw! Is that you?”
He makes his way over to the pool table and pockets his sunglasses.
“This is how I find out you’re stateside?”
“Yeah, I just thought I’d surprise you,” Bradley replies.
She immediately hits him in the stomach with the back of the pool cue. “I guess I surprised you back.”
He can admit he probably deserved that one. He hasn’t been nearly as good at staying in contact with Nat as he should have been. Not when she’s been so steady for him for years.
“It’s good to see you,” he says with a wry smile.
“Good to see you too.”
He pats her on the shoulder and moves past her to glance at the rest of the pilots milling around. He tells himself that it’s out of curiosity and that he’s not looking for anyone specific. He’s gotten a lot better at lying over the years.
It doesn’t take long before he spots Javy talking to a couple of guys he thinks he’s seen before.
Bradley turns back towards Phoenix, “So who all is here?”
She moves around to take another shot before she answers, “You’re not subtle.”
Bradley tries to protest, “It’s not like that. We haven’t seen each other in years.” He pointedly doesn’t mention the few times they’ve hooked up since the last time they were all on North Island, but she doesn’t need to know about that. It wasn’t anything, just a few convenient quick and dirty hookups. It took some time, but Bradley has accepted that he just had the wrong perspective when they were here. It was never serious for Jake and if Bradley treats it the same way, then it’s fine. A new song comes on the and it confirms what he already expected.
He’s here.
“Bradshaw. As I live and breathe.”
Bradley watches him steal a pool cue. It’s the same arrogant shit that he’s always done and he still can’t help but find it attractive.
“Hangman,” Bradley says. It’s easier when he reminds himself that that’s who he is now. “You look…good.”
Bradley might be better at lying to himself, but he’s never fully developed the skill to lie to Jake.
Hangman sinks the shot while looking at Bradley. “Well, I am good, Rooster. I’m very good.”
Bradley shakes his head in faux disbelief. Hangman should teach confidence seminars, there’s no one he’s ever met who has more.
“In fact, I am too good to be true.”
And that’s a truth that Bradley knows very well.
Payback interrupts the tension, “So, anybody know what this special detachment is all about?”
Hangman doesn’t look away from the game as he responds, “No, a mission’s a mission. They don’t confront me.” He sinks another shot before finally looking up around the group finally locking in on Bradley. “What I want to know: Who’s gonna be team leader? And which one of y’all has what it takes to follow me?”
The audacity is too much to handle.
“Hangman,” Bradley emphasizes his name, “the only place you’ll lead anyone is an early grave.”
Bradley lets a small smirk fall on his face. God, it feels good to antagonize him again. To give as good as he gets. He hears the reactions from some of the pilots and sees Javy getting ready to jump to Jake’s defense, but he’s stuck on Hangman grinning back at him.
Hangman moves past Phoenix to stand directly in front of Bradley. “Well, anyone who follows you is just gonna run out of fuel. But that’s just you, ain’t it, Rooster?”
It’s almost like they’re the only two people in the room, circling each other, waiting to see who’s going to get tone.
“You’re snug on that perch, waiting for just the right moment…” Hangman moves even closer, “that never comes.”
Bradley can’t resist glancing at Jake’s lips.
“I love this song.” Hangman finally moves back and heads toward Coyote.
As infuriating as ever, but unsurprising. Jake’s priority has always been and will always be his career and being the best.
Phoenix moves closer to Bradley, offering unspoken support in case he needs it. “Well, he hasn’t changed.”
Bradley’s still watching Hangman make his way around the room. “Nope, sure hasn’t.”
He knows Hangman feels like he’s gotten the upper hand, but Bradley knows how he can get under his skin too. He yanks the jukebox plug out of wall, cutting off Jake’s song.
Hangman might be the best, this mission will certainly help determine the answer to that, but Bradley’s always been better at knowing how to turn a crowd in his favor.
He makes his way over to the piano and starts to play and adamantly doesn’t bother to figure out where Jake is.
This isn’t about him; this is about Bradley showing what he can do.
--
Present
Bradley’s just finished his pizza when his phone rings with an unknown number. Normally he wouldn’t bother answering, it’s probably spam, but something in his gut tells him he needs to.
He’s never liked his gut feelings.
“Hello?”
“Hi, am I speaking with Bradley Bradshaw?” a polite, but firm voice asks.
“Yes?”
“Sir, I have you listed as the emergency contact for Jake Seresin.”
Time freezes for Bradley and his heart starts to race. He can’t help but think about his mom. About her getting a phone call like this. About all the time he spent in the hospital by her bedside.
No one gets phone calls like this for anything good. He can’t think straight. A thousand thoughts are running through his head and the first one that he can manage to grab onto is that last he knew, Javy and Jake were each other’s emergency contacts.
They had been for years, possibly since the first time they were at Top Gun, but he’s never asked. Jake was still Javy’s in the lead up to the mission. He had found Jake in the waiting room for Javy after his G-LOC when he had finally shown up for Natasha after his confrontation with Mav.
He tries to stop himself from going down that path. If he starts thinking about what he said, he’ll think about the possibility that he’ll have to mourn-
No. He’s not going there. It’s probably not as big as a deal as whatever he’s thinking. Maybe they just couldn’t reach Javy?
Bradley knows on some level that he’s spiraling. They were living together for fuck’s sake; it makes sense that Jake would list him. He just didn’t know; Jake never bothered to tell him. Javy’s place in Jake’s life has always been certain. The only thing Bradley had been certain of was that it was only a matter of time until Jake had exited his again.
But Jake had listed him at some point.
Which means Jake was counting on him.
He takes a jagged inhale. The longer he doesn’t ask, maybe it won’t be true. He can’t fathom the thought that-
Fuck. He knows that avoiding it doesn’t change anything.
“What happened?”