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"Nothing about this is fair," Buck lamented while shelving supplies. "His parents died suddenly and none of his living relatives can take him in. The social worker contacted everyone on both Connor and Kameron's sides of the family. Either they couldn't support another child financially or they weren't emotionally or physically capable of caring for a toddler so now he has to stay in the system until someone can adopt him. It's not fair."
Eddie listened intently and patiently, also restocking supplies.
"I offered to adopt him, you know?" Buck continued quietly. "I knew it was a longshot - I'm single, I work odd hours at a dangerous job, and I might be his biological father but I was just a donor. I know I have no legal claim to him - and they turned me down for exactly those reasons."
"I'm sorry that didn't work out. For what it's worth, I know Theo would've been really lucky to have you as a parent."
"Thanks. I just have to hope they find him a good home. Somewhere with people who will love him, who can give him everything he needs."
They talked some more until the tones sounded and they were called off to emergency after emergency. Throughout the rest of their shift Eddie didn't stop thinking about what Buck had said.
A few weeks later, during a forty-eight off, Eddie texted Buck, inviting him over. He kept the text neutral, but on his end of the phone he was excited. A little nervous too, but mostly excited and hopeful.
There was a knock on the door. "Hey Buck," he said, opening the door. Immediately, a pair of tiny feet came running up from behind Eddie shouting "Mr. Poop!"
Buck didn't hesitate to give Theo a hug. "Theo, hi!" Over the kids shoulder Buck gave Eddie an amazed, bewildered look. Without missing a beat he turned back to Theo. "Have you grown since the last time I saw you?"
Theo giggled and guided Buck inside the house, telling him that he had to see the game Chris was teaching him to play. On the table was a Jenga tower. The four of them settled in to continue playing the game. Buck only took his eyes off Theo when it was his turn to move a block. Even then he constantly checked in with Theo "should I pull this one? What do you think?" Their first tower fell during one of Buck's turns; earning him loving teasing from Chris and Theo. They rebuilt the tower. This round was significantly shorter since Theo apparently loved the sound that the blocks made when they crashed more than any other aspect of the game.
Chris left after the third crash saying that he still had some math worksheets to fill out before school the next morning.
Theo continued building and toppling the Jenga blocks while Buck and Eddie moved to the kitchen, keeping Theo in their line of sight. Eddie poured them each a mug of coffee and sat down across from Buck.
"How is he here?" Buck asked, mystified.
"I got in contact with his case worker, called in a favour from Carla - who says 'hi' by the way and was disappointed you didn't call her first - and before I knew it, he was coming to live with me. It's still a trial run for now, but the plan is for it to become permanent. You said they wouldn't let you take him in, but what's important to you is important to me. And he really is such a great kid, it was a no-brainer. This way he might be mine on paper, but for all intents and purposes he is just as much yours."
Buck felt like an hourglass that had just been turned upside down, his thoughts evenly draining from his mind until all that was left was this feeling of disbelief. "You really did that for me?" he asked.
"Yeah. For you and Theo."
A part of Buck wanted nothing more than to show how much he appreciates this by kissing Eddie. He refrained though, the feeling too sudden and far too risky if Eddie didn't reciprocate. "Thank you," he whispered. It didn't feel like enough to convey the gravity of his gratitude, but when Eddie smiled back at him, he thought they understood each other well enough.
Theo scurried over to the two of them. "Will you colour with me?"
"Of course," said Eddie. He brought out some paper and pencil crayons. The pencil crayons were clearly used but definitely long enough that they looked new. "Do you want to show Buck what you were drawing earlier?"
Theo shouted an enthusiastic "yes!" He flipped through pages of scribbles until he found what he was looking for. He showed Buck a piece of paper that had six stick figures, all quite tall except for one on the far left that looked about half the height of the others. From left to right Theo introduced the characters: "There's me, there's my mommy, there's my daddy, there's you - you have poop on your shirt because you're Mr. Poop -" sure enough there were extra scribbles made with a dark brown pencil crayon along stick figure Buck's approximate chest area "- and then there's Eddie, and there's Chris." It was very clearly a four-year-old's drawing and Buck found every speck of it endearing. "This is incredible Theo!"
They spent the next ten minutes drawing until Theo decided that he wanted to do something else.
"How about you get into your pajamas and we'll read some stories before bed," Eddie suggested.
"I wanna play more Jenga!"
"We can play Jenga again in the morning. If you get ready now we can read three stories before you fall asleep."
Theo looked ready to argue further, but Eddie interrupted before he had the chance. "Let's show Buck your bedroom!" That got Theo excited.
"I thought this was a two bedroom house?" Buck whispered to Eddie.
"Technically it is, but I'd been using the office as a storage room. It's large enough that I could easily convert it into a bedroom spacious enough for a four year old. I'll have to start looking for a new place soon though. It won't be long before he grows out of this setup."
Buck found himself wanting to say something impulsive. Something along the lines of "I have three bedrooms, move in with me." but Theo's excited "look Buck!" as he showed him inside the renovated office shoved that away for future consideration.
Sure enough the office had just enough space for a bed and a chest that likely housed clothes and pajamas. There was a nightlight on the wall near the bed and on the opposite wall a cozy looking corner with extra blankets, a pile of kid friendly picture books, and a few toy trucks.
"Wow! Is this your room?" Buck asked.
"Uh-huh," was Theo's reply.
Buck and Eddie helped Theo get into pajamas and brush his teeth and then they found Chris so the boys could say goodnight. Theo asked Chris if he would read a story. Chris agreed.
Eventually, three bedtime stories later, Theo was settled enough to sleep. After turning on the nightlight, Eddie turned off the overhead light and they all slipped out, leaving the door open a few inches in case Theo needed anything.
"I'm heading to bed too," Chris announced. After saying goodnight and turning to get ready himself it was just Buck and Eddie in the kitchen.
“I still can't believe you did all this. And without telling me,” Buck said, leaning his shoulder into Eddie's.
Eddie shrugged, "I didn't want to get your hopes up if I got denied."
"I almost don't want to leave. I feel like if I walk out that door, go back to my house, I'll wake up and find out this was all a dream."
"Then stay," Eddie said, like it was that easy.
It took all of Buck's will power for him to say "I can't."
"Why not? My bed's big enough for two, or if you'd rather we can make up the couch. It's Theo's first night, it would be nice to have someone he's so connected to just down the hall," he reasoned. "Why can't you stay?"
Buck couldn't look at Eddie. As he focused on his now cold coffee he said, "because if I stay, I might never leave. I might start seeing this as something it's not."
"What might you see it as?"
He was officially in too deep, he couldn't change course now. "If I stay, I might start seeing this as a family. I know - I know we are family, but if I stay it would feel like a different kind of family. A..." he struggled to find just the right way to describe it.
"A 'let's take our kids on week long vacations together' family? A 'you sign the permission slip this time' family? A 'you're my emergency contact' family" Eddie tried. When Buck nodded, Eddie continued lightly, "I hate to break it to you Buck, we kind of are that kind of family already."
"What about a 'morning kisses over breakfast' family? A 'come home after a long shift to couch cuddles' family? A ''til death do us part' family?" When Buck finished he finally got the courage to look at Eddie again. Eddie was smiling.
"The only thing between us as we are now and those definitions of family is one question."
"And what would that be?" Buck braved.
"Buck. Will you be my boyfriend?"
Buck stared at Eddie, mouth dropped open, speechless.
"That's usually the part where you would say 'yes, Eddie, I'd love to be your boyfriend.' Or, if I've read this completely and embarrassingly wrong you'd say -"
Buck would never know what he would say if Eddie had been wrong, because he wasn't.
Buck kissed Eddie. It was heartfelt and gentle. For an unknown length of time their lips were magnets, locked together, taking both of their full force to eventually pull away.
"Now I'm really convinced that this has to be a dream."
"If it is, it's the best damn dream I've ever had," Eddie said and brought Buck in for another, shorter kiss. "So that's a yes?"
"Yes. Yes it is."
"And will you stay?"
Buck nodded, "yeah, I'll stay."
"Good."
"You should move in with me. Like you said, Theo's going to grow out of the office-bedroom faster than we think. I have three full bedrooms. It doesn't have to be right away, we can even find a new house. Anything you want, as long as we're together, all four of us."
Eddie grinned dopily, "all four of us. I like the sound of that."