Chapter Text
Chapter 1
“Father, please - I am your loyal son.”
“You will learn respect, and suffering will be your teacher.”
Zuko was aware of his father’s hand nearing his face, then pain, then nothing at all.
Zuko only remembered flashes after that. A healer, with a dissatisfied tsk every time he checked the bandages, the sounds of robes rustling. Uncle coming in the night, trying to tell him something…
“You must leave, Prince Zuko, you must never come back or Ozai will have you killed -”
If I had a nickel for every time a family member came to me in the middle of the night and told me my father was going to kill me, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice, right?
Then he was being moved - where were they taking him? The healer’s drugs made his vision all swimmy - that didn’t make sense he wasn’t a waterbender - if only Father was a waterbender, then he wouldn’t be in so much pain pain pain - he would be able to think if it didn’t hurt so much -
***
Zuko awoke on a cot that was slowly swaying from side to side. There was a lantern on the ceiling, swinging with a gentle rhythm. It looked too real to be a dream, and the movement was too regular for an earthquake. He was on a ship then. He tried to look around, but the tiniest movement made his face explode with pain. He poked at the bandage covering his left eye and ear, a pit opening in his stomach as he remembered.
He had spoken out of turn during a war meeting. He had challenged one of the most decorated generals in the Fire Nation. He had embarrassed the Fire Lord. He had disgraced himself when he knelt and begged when he should have stood and fought. He remembered the white-hot fear as his father came closer and closer, his hand aflame.
He remembered Uncle rushing into the palace’s sick ward, frantically whispering, trying to tell him something, but all he could focus on was the burning, burning burning. He smelled the military-grade burn salve; heard the healers scurrying around trying to stave off infection. Uncle had been there, urging him to listen but how could he listen his face was on fire.
His thoughts were interrupted by the scrape of a metal door being opened. A woman entered the room, bandages and a bowl of water in hand. She wore loose, cream colored robes, distinctly lacking any Fire Nation insignia.
“Good, you’re awake,” she said. Her voice was soft and kind. “My name is Alma. I’ve been taking care of you these past few days.” Her wizened face came into view as she sat on a low stool next to the cot.
“Wh - where-” he tried to speak, but was interrupted by a horrible dry cough. Agony shot through his face as his lungs tried to expel themselves from his chest.
Alma tsked. “Oh dear.” She helped him sit up, gently guiding a ladle to his lips. Cool water soothed his throat. “I know you must be confused,” she said, “so I’ll be frank with you. After you were burned” (by your father, she didn’t say) “The wound quickly became infected. You very nearly died. In fact, the Fire Lord believes you did. The only reason you’re still alive is because the healers kept treating you, even after Ozai ordered them to stop.” She paused to let that sink in.
When Ozai ordered the healers to stop treating me? Zuko thought. No, Father only meant to teach me a lesson, not kill me -
Alma grabbed his hand and placed it on her own chest. “Copy my breathing, Zuko. In and out, that’s it.”
He hadn’t realized he’d been hyperventilating. He didn’t register that she’d called him Zuko, not Prince.
The healer’s eyes went sad. “I’m sorry, Zuko. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you have to know. The whole Fire Nation believes you are dead. Ozai sent out a royal proclamation declaring that you succumbed to a mysterious illness a few days ago. The only people who know the truth are myself and General Iroh.”
Zuko’s uncovered eye went wide. “U-uncle?”
Alma’s face softened. “Your uncle was the one who arranged passage for you on this ship. At great personal risk to himself, in fact. He loves you very much.”
Zuko’s vision went water. His own father had burned him and left him to die. But Uncle had… committed treason to save him? He blinked hard, letting a tear run down his cheek.
“I know this is a lot to take in. I wish I could let you rest more, but I need to check your wound.”
Zuko nodded, pointedly not thinking about what Alma had told him. He was tired and he hurt and it was just too much. He braced himself as the healer slowly removed the bandages on his face and neck. He tried to open his left eye, but nothing happened. The entire left side of his periphery was obscured. He felt himself starting to panic again as his eye resolutely remained shut.
“Zuko, breathe.” Alma once more exaggerated and slowed her breathing until he was able to copy her. “We did all we could for your eye. You may eventually regain control of the eyelid, but I don’t expect you’ll be able to see out of it again. I’m sorry.”
Zuko wanted to yell, to scream, to stomp his feet and demand that she work harder, do something. How dare this woman come in her and turn his world upside down and tell him half his vision was just gone -
But her expression was filled with such genuine concern and sorrow and care. When was the last time someone really cared about him?
His mother cared, but what did that matter, she had left -
Zuko cleared his throat, dry again despite the water. “Why are you helping me?”
Alma’s gaze turned misty. “My son was in the 41st division. I know you were trying to help them.”
Zuko stared. “Was? You mean -”
“Yes, was.” She hurriedly swiped a tear from her cheek. “The entire division was sent to the front. Non- none of them came back.”
None of them came back. None of them came back. Even after everything - challenging General Bujing, challenging Father - it was all for nothing. All of those soldiers died. Zuko couldn’t save them.
All words caught in his throat, and not from lack of water this time.
“I’m so sorry,” he rasped. “I should have done more -”
“No Zuko,” Alma said firmly. “Your uncle told me everything. You were the only one who tried to help. You saw that a whole division of new recruits was about to be sacrificed and you stood up for them. And then you were burned for it. It is not your fault.” She gently held his face so he couldn’t look away. “Listen to me. None of this is your fault.”
That… didn’t make sense. Zuko had disrespected that general in his father’s war room. The Fire Lord could just let things like that slide. Then this woman’s son had been killed, an entire division slaughtered like so many lamb-piglets. He took her words and shoved them firmly in a box in his mind. He absolutely could not deal with that right now.
“What was your son’s name?” he asked.
“Yuzem,” Alma whispered. “He was fifteen.” She smiled sadly. “He would have liked you.”
A loud crash sounded from the deck above. Alma snapped up, alert. She crept to the cabin door and carefully opened it. Zuko heard shouting, like the entire ship had dissolved into chaos. Alma snapped the door shut.
“Pirates,” she hissed. She frantically began rummaging through her bag. “They can’t find out who you are. Even with the scar, you’re too recognizable.” She pulled out what she was looking for; a knife. She looked regretful. “Forgive me,” she whispered. Before he could react, she raised the knife and sliced his ponytail off at the root. It was thrown out the porthole before he even knew what happened.
The cabin door burst open. In stalked a tall man with a wide brimmed, frilly hat. A large lizard-parrot perched on his shoulder.
“My,” he drawled, “what have we here?”
Alma drew herself up, brandishing her knife. “Only a humble fishing crew,” she said, keeping her eyes on the man. “Let us go. We have no quarrel with you.”
The pirate barked a laugh. It was harsh and cruel sounding. “You hear that, Han? This little lady wants us to leave her alone!”
A second pirate appeared in the doorway. “But Captain, pirates don’t leave anyone alone. We take whatever we want!” They both laughed, putting the hyena-rhinos in the Caldera Zoo to shame.
“Sorry little lady,” the captain said. “This sorry vessel’s ours now, and you’ll all fetch us lots of gold on the slave market.”
“Don’t touch her,” Zuko growled. He tried to sound intimidating, but he could barely hold himself up.
The captain turned, seeing Zuko for the first time. “Agni’s ashes kid, what happened to you?” He squinted at Zuko’s wound. He could only assume it was ugly. He hadn’t seen it himself. “Damaged goods don’t sell for nearly as much, but I’m sure we can find a use for you.” The pirate snapped his fingers and his lackey moved toward Zuko, sword drawn. Zuko stumbled off the cot, somehow managing to fall into a defensive stance without falling over.
The pirate sneered. “Now, now, there’s no need for that. We’ll all just go up to the deck, all friendly-like -” he was cut off by the fireball Zuko bent in his direction.
Rather, the fireball Zuko tried to bend. In his weakened state, he only managed to create a pathetic puff of smoke. The pirate grinned impossibly wide. “So, the crispy one’s a firebender! Even with that scar, you’ll make me enough to retire on!”
“No!” Alma shouted and lunged at the captain, who whipped out a wicked looking scabbard. The healer woman was no match for the pirate. Her battle cry cut off with an awful squelch. Zuko could only stare in shock and horror as the pirates hauled him away. That woman was the first person to show him kindness since the Agni Kai, and she would be the last for a long, long time.