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It starts with a dull ache.
Jake has already left for class when Heeseung wakes up, so he doesn’t think much about it. Usually, he’d mention to his mate that he was feeling weird, and maybe Jake would remind him that his rut is coming up or something, but Jake isn’t here and Heeseung feels too tired to even really care. His eyes feel heavy in a way that only happens after he’s pulled an all-nighter, and his body feels a little hot, almost like a fever is approaching him.
It takes him awhile to get out of bed, but he has class in an hour, which means he needs to get ready and shower before he leaves.
Heeseung doesn’t really want to, though. Images of Jake flash through his mind with no preamble, but they all work to remind him of one thing. If he takes a shower, he’ll no longer smell like Jake. His mate’s scent would be replaced by his own heady alpha scent, something that Heeseung hates to smell on himself, especially when he’s feeling so floaty and missing Jake.
He hates the mornings when they don’t wake up together, when Jake has to leave early because of class or work or some equally acceptable reason. After all, just because it’s acceptable doesn’t mean that Heeseung has to like it. He wants to be scented, wants everyone to know that he’s taken, but it doesn’t work like that all the time.
Sometimes Jake’s scent is too faint since he’s a beta, too clean and neutral for anyone to really tell that he’s been claimed. They make it a routine to scent each other everyday, but it seems like Jake didn’t want to wake him or disturb his sleep, probably since he knows that Heeseung hasn’t been sleeping well recently.
Still, he wishes that Jake had scented him. It’s not a big deal, it really isn’t, but it still makes a heavy weight settle over his chest, pushing down on him and causing his eyes to water. Jake loves him, he knows that Jake loves him, but he still feels alone here, in their shared apartment, the sun barely peaking through the blinds and warming his skin. He forces himself to get out of bed, assessing himself in the mirror with a low whine.
The marks that Jake had left all over his neck are fading. Usually it would be fine, usually he’d shyly ask Jake for more, but today it feels like a rejection. Hadn’t Jake noticed how light they’d gotten? How much they’d healed over? Did he no longer care about showing off Heeseung?
He’s not an omega. He’s an alpha, he shouldn’t need to be shown off, but it still feels good when Jake does it, when he assures Heeseung that there’s nothing wrong with him as an alpha. That wanting to feel safe and protected wasn’t inherently an omega thing.
Heeseung runs his fingers over the light marks on his neck, breathing softly as he tries not to let it get to him. Jake would never be able to permanently mark him, would never be able to permanently scent him either, and it all feels symbolic of getting everything wrong. Heeseung doesn’t know why he was born as an alpha instead of an omega, doesn’t know why he has to conform to what society expects of him as an alpha, but he knows one thing.
He hates feeling sensitive about his shortcomings, hates admitting to Jake—who is always so confident and sure of himself—that he doesn’t really like being an alpha. It’s the cards that he’s been dealt, and Jake has never made him feel any less for his aversion towards his secondary gender, but it still aches all the same.
With tired eyes and an exhausted mind, Heeseung grudgingly gets ready for the day. He skips showering because despite the fact that he knows he’ll see Jake after his first class, he can’t convince himself that he’ll be okay—that he won’t miss the faint scent sticking to him already. When he goes to get dressed he sifts through Jake’s dirty laundry, pulling out an oversized hoodie that he wore to the gym.
It’s probably gross. It’s most definitely dirty. But when Heeseung brings it up to his nose and inhales, he gets a whiff of Jake’s neutral scent—fresh linen and lavender—so faint yet still prominent. It comforts his alpha, so he pulls it over his head, bringing the collar up to his nose to smell it again.
It satiates him for now. His mind stops running wild and he finally feels like he can breathe again.
⋆˚࿔
Heeseung feels himself floating. He doesn’t pay attention at all during his first class, doesn’t take notes, doesn’t even really listen to the lecture. All that’s on his mind is the feeling of the ache and heat beneath his skin, the thought of Jake and his scent, his teeth, the claim that he so easily has over Heeseung. He can’t stop thinking about the faded marks, the no longer there scent. Can’t stop taking it as a rejection.
He’s not usually this needy or soft, but something is pulling him under—has been all morning. He needs Jake. His alpha is begging for him to leave this lecture hall, to go to Jake’s office and to beg him for some sort of release. He doesn’t know what he wants, all he knows is that he wants his beta, wants his scent all over him, his teeth biting down hard enough to draw blood, his hand wrapped tightly around his knot as he forces Heeseung to take.
Like he’s an omega.
He lets out a quiet whine, small and shameful as he tries to hide in Jake’s hoodie. He hopes that no one can hear or smell how desperate he is, how much he needs this, but he’s in a lecture hall full of people, and he knows it’s only a matter of time before his desperation becomes apparent. He doesn’t think, just feels his senses become submerged and far away, like he can’t ignore the burning desire just underneath his skin.
Heeseung doesn’t care for the repercussions when he picks up his belongings and rushes out of the lecture hall, head bowed down in shame like he doesn’t want anyone to know who he is and what he’s doing. His feet move on autopilot, guiding him towards the building that houses Jake’s office.
He feels stupid as he walks, eyes welling with tears that blur his vision no matter how much he tries to wipe them away. His body pulls him towards Jake, wants Jake’s comfort even though they scented just last night, but his mind tells him that he’s irrational. Jake won’t give him what he wants, not while he’s scolding Heeseung for skipping class, for being irresponsible and needy and so stupid—
But it’s not Jake who tells him those things. It never is. It’s his own brain, feeding him lies about himself, about Jake and their relationship. He doesn’t know what’s happening, but he knows that whatever it is, Jake will help him—won’t ever ridicule him. He’s confident in that fact, and it’s the little push he needs to stop himself from fully breaking down. He breathes, in and out, counts the steps that he takes, tries to take note of things that he notices on his walk. All things that Jake taught him, things that would ground him when he feels like this—when he’s overwhelmed and his mind is working overtime to throw him into a fit of anxiety.
He thinks of Jake. Takes another step, mumbles the number under his breath. He sees someone reading something underneath a tree, their shirt is yellow and the book is a worn copy of The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. It’s a classic, a novella that he frequents because he likes the internal conflict that Dr. Jekyll faces. He likes the mystery, the way he’s guided through the plot. It’s recognizable, grounding. He breathes. It’s familiar, the campus and the students and the world around him.
He’s okay. The building appears in front of him like magic, but Heeseung knows that there’s approximately two hundred steps between the English building and the STEM building where Jake’s office is located. He finally lets out another breath before pulling the door open, not speaking to anyone as he bolts for the elevators. He presses the button to the third floor, sighing when he’s finally alone. He slumps against the wall, running a tired hand over his face.
He checks the time. His class just ended, so he doesn’t think that he missed much. If he did, Jake would help him catch up like he always does. The thought weighs on him though, almost like his decision to leave early feels unwarranted now that he’s here. He considers hiding from Jake, hiding from this strange situation all together, but the elevator opens and he’s faced with his reality.
He travels through the STEM department with his chin tucked against his chest, the complete opposite of what an alpha should be. He feels embarrassed and out of place, but he makes his way to Jake’s office like it’s second nature. He’s been here so many times already, so it is, but sometimes he still needs the reassurance that he belongs here. That he’s Jake’s.
He stops in front of the door. It’s open, but he doesn’t step inside. He waits until Jake lifts his head from his laptop, eyebrows furrowed as notices Heeseung, head bowed, hands clasped tightly in front of him, and body filled with tension.
“Hee, baby,” he calls softly, getting up from his chair to beckon Heeseung inside. “You’re early,” he continues, voice soft and gentle when he closes the door behind them, basking them in their own privacy.
The lock clicks, they’re alone, and Heeseung finally lets go of all of the tension. His eyes water as he glances up at Jake, biting his bottom lip as he crumbles. His face scrunches up when he cries, sniffling lightly as he reaches for Jake.
“Oh, baby,” Jake repeats, voice filled with concern and affection as he pulls Heeseung in for a hug. The second their bodies connect, Heeseung clings onto Jake, fingers rumpling the freshly pressed dress shirt that he’s wearing. Jakes’s nose glides over his scent gland, inhaling deeply as he hums like he’s confirming something. “I think you’re in pre-rut, Heeseung.”
The words don’t register.
“Y-You left without scenting me. No one knows that I’m yours.”
Jake lets out a wounded sound, pulling Heeseung closer into him and properly scenting him the best that he can. It’s never going to be strong enough. Never going to really stick, but he does it anyways. He tries anyway, because maybe one day it will.
Heeseung only cries louder, tilting his head to the side for easier access.
“You’re mine,” Jake mutters quietly, licking over Heeseung’s neck and sinking his teeth into it. The skin breaks and he laps at the blood, but nothing changes, not the way it had when Heeseung had marked Jake. “You’re always mine, sweetheart. Even if you don’t smell like me, we both know that you’re mine,” he says, voice gentle and coaxing like he doesn’t want to startle Heeseung with their reality.
The alpha sniffles and Jake pulls away to bring a tissue up to his eyes and nose. He wipes away the tears wordlessly, holding a fresh one under his nose and instructing him to blow. Heeseung feels like a child, but the gentle way that Jake guides him warms his heart and makes him feel a little better. His tears stop, Jake’s scent is fresh on him and his neck aches from the bite, but it doesn’t matter. He feels somewhat sated, but it still isn’t enough.
He still burns beneath his skin, body blazing up in an uncontrollable fire. He whimpers at the pain, slumping against Jake and mewling when his arms wrap around his waist tightly again.
“Definitely in pre-rut,” Jake confirms teasingly, bringing a hand up to push Heeseung’s bangs away from his face. He feels his temperature too, the touch so gentle and warm and caring. Always so caring. “You’re warm all over, pretty.”
Heeseung whines at the words, embarrassment blooming all over his face as he tries to hide in Jake’s chest. Truthfully, Heeseung’s ruts have been a bit difficult to manage throughout their relationship. Jake has always been there, attentive and ready to take care of him the way that he needs, but Heeseung hasn’t felt fully comfortable to completely let go yet. It’s a big part of himself that he holds close to his heart, and even if he shares everything with Jake, it’s been hard to share this side of him.
The side of him that completely goes against his instincts. The side of him that he never lets anyone truly see. Jake has been patient, has taken things at Heeseung’s pace and allowed him to control how far they do or don’t go, but Heeseung knows that he owes this to his mate. That he should show all sides of him.
In case Jake ever wants to leave—in case it’s too much.
“Do you feel okay? You look floaty,” Jake comments when he doesn’t say anything, gently leading Heeseung to his desk.
Heeseung shakes his head. “Need you. Wanna be close, wanna feel safe,” he manages to get out, voice quiet and somewhat ashamed. His cock twitches pathetically at the words, tummy filling with arousal as he looks up at Jake.
The beta inhales sharply, obviously affected by Heeseung’s words too. “Okay, baby. I’ve got you.” He settles in his office chair then, spreading his legs in some sort of routine that has become familiar for them. “Kneel for me.”
His body fights it, but Heeseung wins. It goes against his nature to submit to anyone, let alone a beta, but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t let stupid social constricts or biology stop him from getting what he wants. He sinks to the floor underneath the desk, knees hitting the carpet with much more force than he intends. It doesn’t matter. The pain doesn’t register when he’s like this.
He kneels perfectly, so perfect that Jake can’t help but to pet his hair softly, praising him sweetly. His hand feels warm against his scalp, fingertips brushing through the strands as his entire body quivers. Jake’s free hand works to unbutton his pants and pull out his soft cock, stroking it a few times before guiding the leaking tip to Heeseung’s plush lips.
“Open up for me, sweetheart,” Jake whispers, thumb coming up to pull at Heeseung’s bottom lip.
Heeseung allows his brain to go under, to succumb to what he needs so badly. His instincts fight him every step of the way, but he ignores them, ignores everything in favor of doing this. Of allowing himself this. Jake’s cock is thick on his lips and the taste of his precome is bitter when he pushes it inside of his mouth. It doesn’t matter, the heavy weight settles him, quiets his racing mind as he closes his eyes and leans his head against Jake’s thigh.
“There you go. Like that. So good for me,” Jake whispers, hands still stroking through his hair. Heeseung listens, body going slack and submitting to Jake in a way that should feel wrong, but doesn’t. Not really.
He doesn’t know how long he floats for. His mouth stays wrapped around Jake’s length, eyelids heavy as he breathes softly through his nose. Jake works quietly from above him, probably grading assignments or completing some of his own. The sounds of his fingers hitting the keys of his computer keep Heeseung in a daze that isn’t too far away from reality. He listens to each click and clack, but doesn’t allow them to mean anything beyond what they are. Comforting noises that remind him that he’ll eventually need to come up.
Minutes pass, maybe hours, before Jake is gently running his hands through his hair again, coaxing Heeseung back to the surface. Heeseung whines when he pulls his cock out of his mouth, rubbing his cheek all over Jake’s thigh like that would get him to put it back inside.
“You have class soon. Can’t be all floaty and soft like this,” Jake instructs, voice soft but leaving no room for argument. Even if Heeseung hates it, hates having to part with Jake like this, he still listens, still complies with no questions asked. He’s right anyways, Heeseung does have class and he really can’t afford to miss anything else today.
He doesn’t stand right away. Jake reaches down after he tucks himself back into his pants, wiping a bit of drool and precome from the corner of Heeseung’s mouth. “You did good, baby. Always perfect for me,” he praises, knowing how much Heeseung loves it, how much it makes him feel loved and validated.
Even if it warms Heeseung’s heart and makes him feel wanted, it’s not enough. The dull ache beneath his skin has only manifested itself into something more intense, more wanting and further away from who he should be as an alpha. He lets out a whine that he knows is bratty, one that only pulls him further down, further away from reality and into dangerous territory.
Jake always catches him though, no matter how soft or how deep he is, Jake is there to catch him.
“I know you want more, I know, baby,” Jake starts, pushing his chair back so that he could effectively crouch down to Heeseung’s height beneath the desk. “You can’t stay like this, and I can’t do anything else because it’ll trigger your rut. You still have the entire day to get through,” he reminds, hand coming up to softly cup Heeseung’s cheek. He leans in then, pressing a firm kiss to his lips as if that would stop the tears from falling, as if it’d be enough to fully satiate him.
Heeseung pouts, mind already filled with the hazy fog that comes with each of his ruts without fail. “Don’t wanna. Wanna stay here, need to be safe.”
Jake coos softly. “You’re safe. Always safe with me,” he says, brushing a soft thumb over one of Heeseung’s scent glands. “You still have class to get to. Can’t hide under my desk all day.”
Heeseung lets out a huff, whining again when Jake pulls him out of the comfort and darkness beneath his desk. Jake’s arms never leave him, instead steadying him when they stand, grounding him softly and sweetly, like he knows just how much every touch means to Heeseung.
“Please don’t make me go,” Heeseung says, eyes big and shiny as he juts his bottom lip out into a pout again. “I like it under your desk, it’s like my second favorite sleeping spot.”
Jake laughs softly, just between the two of them, as he leans in and pecks those pretty lips once more. “If you feel weird I want you to text me, okay? If you feel your rut starting just tell me and I’ll meet you back home. Good?”
And even if Heeseung wants to stay here, wants to never leave Jake’s side, he nods, voice quiet when he says, “Good.”
“I love you,” Jake gently reminds, hand curling over his hip and pulling him in closer. “I always want you to smell like me,” he adds, nosing at Heeseung’s scent gland and rubbing his cheek against it, licking over it and even lightly biting. It works, Heeseung relaxes into his hold, humming to himself contently now that he smells like his mate.
He nuzzles against Jake’s neck, cheek running over his mating mark while he inhales the mixture of their scents that’s stuck onto his skin. “I love you too.”
⋆˚࿔
Heeseung is fine throughout the rest of the day. The discomfort doesn’t really go away, not when his rut feels like it’s on the verge of tipping, but he pushes through, if only to be good for Jake. His classes drag, but he tries his best to pay attention, to be the student he knows he can be. He texts Jake throughout the day, mostly letting him know that he feels fine and that he’s okay.
Every time a message comes in from Jake, Heeseung feels his heart clench. It’s always the beta making sure that he doesn’t need anything, making sure that he still feels grounded and present. After he had been with Jake earlier that morning, it feels like his body is less on edge. He’d gotten the confirmation he needed, Jake isn’t rejecting him and isn’t intentionally allowing his scent or his marks to fade from Heeseung. The bite mark—that’s still throbbing—tells him that much.
“That looks like it hurts.”
Heeseung frowns, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he stops packing up his things and looks up at the person standing in front of him. He realizes that the hoodie he’s wearing has somewhat shifted over, showing off the mark that Jake gave him earlier. He doesn’t have the energy to deal with this right now, to deal with somebody that he doesn’t know, but he plasters on a fake—almost painfully so—smile and turns around to face them.
It’s another alpha, his scent bitter and all consuming, almost like he’s demanding all of the attention in the room. Heeseung wonders if he smells like that, if his scent is that thick and dominant. The thought makes him shiver, shoving his laptop further into his bag before zipping it closed.
“It doesn’t. It’s just my mating claim,” he says, unsure of why he’s even telling some alpha he’s never met so much about his personal life.
The alpha’s face scrunches up in disgust. “You let an omega claim you? What kind of alpha are you?”
Heeseung’s breath stutters, the weight of the alpha’s words pressing down on his chest. He feels his phone buzz in his pocket, surely Jake asking him when he’ll get home. He tries to ground himself, tries to tell himself that there’s nothing wrong with him, nothing wrong with needing to be claimed.
He hears Jake’s voice telling him that it’s okay, that he’s fine and he shouldn’t care what some idiot alpha thinks of him, but it doesn’t work. The alpha’s scent sours, like the thought of someone like Heeseung completely repulses him. He decides that he won’t say anything, that he’ll just leave and rush back home so that he could surround himself with Jake’s scent, with his touch and his voice, for the next few days.
There’s no telling how long he’ll be in rut for, but he knows that if he slips before he gets home, it’ll make the entire situation that much more stressful and anxiety invoking. Jake would want him to keep his calm, to reel in any snarky comments he has and not let this alpha get to him.
“He’s a beta, actually, and I let him claim me because he sees me as an equal and I see him like that too,” he says, voice sounding much weaker than he intends it to. Usually, this kind of thing doesn’t get to him, but with his rut on the verge of breaking and his emotional morning, Heeseung feels a lot more fragile and vulnerable.
The alpha’s eyebrows shoot all the way up to his hairline, showing his apparent shock and confusion. He sniffs the air lightly, almost like he’s looking for the beta’s scent, almost like he doesn’t believe what Heeseung is saying. His nose scrunches up like the combination of their scents is terrible, like he can’t even stand to smell it on Heeseung.
“Except it’ll never be real,” he snarks, voice deep and chest rumbling with a growl. “Your fantasy of a relationship will never be a real bond, not like something you’d have with an omega. You can pretend that it’s real, but it’s not.”
Heeseung clenches his jaw. “It doesn’t matter. It’s still real to me—to us.”
The alpha laughs in his face. “You’re pathetic. I haven’t even seen omegas acting as pathetic as you, walking around with a beta’s bite on your neck like it means something, like it’ll ever be recognized as a true mating bond.”
The words strike Heeseung right where it hurts most. He clutches at his chest like that would alleviate the pain, like he can protect himself from hearing this. He knows that the other alpha is right, that what he and Jake have could never be what they want. He’s not an omega, Jake would never be able to claim him, would never be able to make it permanent. But this is exactly what he asked for, for people to know that he belongs to somebody—to Jake.
It shouldn’t feel like this. It shouldn’t hurt this deeply.
He fumbles for something to say, for a way to justify his relationship, but nothing comes. He’s disappointed in himself for not being able to defend Jake and their relationship, disappointed at the fact that he does feel ashamed for being so…
Pathetic.
Just like the alpha said.
Neither of them says anything else, and Heeseung just pulls his hood further over his head and hides his face. He leaves the lecture hall without a second thought, not caring about how it makes him appear. All he knows is that he needs to get home, needs to be safe. He feels too exposed, too criticized. He’s always been proud of Jake’s marks on his neck, his scent on his clothes, but right now it all feels like a weight too heavy for him to carry.
He barely looks up from his shoes as he rushes back home. His mind is racing and his heart is pounding, his head aches and his body feels hot with the early signs of his rut. The alpha’s words pingpong in the back of his mind, looping over and over like a broken record. He feels like he’s been cracked apart, like each and every insecurity has been put on display for everyone. He makes sure that the mark stays covered as he walks, makes sure that no one will comment on it again.
It doesn’t take him very long to get back to their apartment. He stands outside of the tall building, its shadow looming over him like a black omen. The sun is still out, but on its way to setting. The sky bleeds into early shades of orange and pink, melting together like a beautiful watercolor painting. Heeseung looks up, watches the clouds as they move, and releases the breath that he’s been holding.
He tries not to let the words bother him, tries not to feel ashamed of himself, but when he arrives at their door, he hesitates. The key is in his hand, the lock is so close, and Jake is just behind the door, probably waiting for him. Something holds him back.
He feels so angry at himself for not saying anything to that alpha, so angry that he had even been born an alpha. None of this is his fault, yet it feels like it is. Jake always says that he’s brave and strong, but he hadn’t been either of those two things. He had allowed himself to cower, allowed himself to feel shameful about his relationship with Jake.
None of it feels good at all.
Before he has the chance to decide what he wants to do, the door swings open and Jake is standing there, a teasing look on his face as he says, “Were you planning on standing out here all night?”
Heeseung doesn’t even reply, just feels everything come back up, all of the hard emotions from the day, the feelings of rejection and the words of that stupid alpha. It feels heavy, heavier than he can really handle, and he pushes past Jake, unwilling to show his teary eyed shame.
He doesn’t look back when he reaches their bedroom, picking up some random article of clothing from Jake’s laundry again before collapsing on the bed. He brings it up to his nose, inhaling deeply as he tries to calm his nerves. Everything feels so hot—too hot—and he sits up, taking his shirt off and throwing it to the ground.
He cuddles with Jake’s shirt, squeezing his eyes shut as he cries softly to himself, suddenly feeling so resentful and regretful. He hadn’t said anything, hadn’t even defended Jake. He feels terrible, feels like he should have said more to establish his place in this world, to say that his existence is valued even if he isn’t a stereotypical alpha.
Even if he never will be.
He still curls into himself, hiding under the covers as he trembles quietly.
As expected, Jake follows him into their shared bedroom, breaths soft and quiet as the bed dips with his weight. He sneaks under the covers, holding Heeseung by the waist as he lays on his side to face him. Heeseung feels so embarrassed to be hiding under their bedding like this, but Jake doesn’t seem like he minds. His eyes are patient, waiting like they’ve got all the time in the world, like the small space between them doesn’t reek of pre-rut.
“What’s got my pretty boy crying this much?” Jake gently asks, bringing a soft hand up to wipe at the tears streaming down his face.
Heeseung doesn’t respond, but he leans into the touch, body burning for it. It’s the worst time to do this, especially since he feels his rut pulling him further down, begging for more of his attention. What had felt like a somewhat blurry haze throughout the day now turns into something that consumes him, consumes all rationale. He feels like he’s on fire, and the feeling only makes him cry harder, the pain of it all colliding on him.
The words are on the tip of his tongue, but he hesitates. Doesn’t want them to affect Jake, to hurt him and make him feel like he isn’t enough, but logic has been overrun by instinct, and even if there is hesitation, Heeseung says it anyway.
“We can never have a real mating bond. I’m never going to be enough for you, never gonna give you pups, never gonna make you happy. I can’t be what you want.”
Jake’s breath hitches, almost like he can’t believe what Heeseung is saying. He doesn’t speak at first, but his hands wrap around Heeseung’s body, pulling him closer until bare skin is touching skin. Heeseung hadn’t even realized that Jake had taken his shirt off, but he assumes that the beta just wanted to comfort him, to scent him without the barrier of clothing in between them.
“That’s not true,” he whispers, placing a tender kiss over Heeseung’s mark. His thumb presses against it, making Heeseung whine from beside him, body heating up all over again, cock basically aching at this point. He’s not in rut, but he’s close, he’s so close that he can feel himself slipping, and Jake must realize it too. They can’t really have this conversation right now, not when Heeseung’s scent shifts into something lust filled—something tainted with arousal.
“What we have is real, whether you think so or not. My mark on your neck is just as real as yours on mine, and it doesn’t matter that it fades away a little. What matters is that you’ll always be mine, and I’ll mark your neck as many times as I have to. I don’t care about any of that, kitty,” Jake says, voice firm as he kisses all over Heeseung’s neck, as he rubs his and licks at the scent glands there.
Heeseung still trembles, but he leans into the touches, wanting nothing more than for Jake to claim him in the way that they both love. “I’m sorry,” he says, voice watery and bottom lip trembling.
Jake kisses him so softly, like Heeseung is something that needs to be cherished. “You have nothing to be sorry for, Heeseung. I mean it, that stuff isn’t important to me. What’s important is you and how you’re feeling,” he says, voice gentle and genuine, filled with emotion and grace that Heeseung isn’t sure he deserves.
He doesn’t know what to say, not really. Jake has told him all of these things before, has reassured him time and time again that he doesn’t care, that it’s not important. But the words never stick. He can’t help it when the tears only pour out faster. He can’t help it when he tries to escape Jake’s hold. The grip around him tightens and Jake’s hand comes up to his neck, rubbing over the back of it in an attempt to calm him down. He pinches lightly, but even that light nip is enough for Heeseung to stop, for his entire body to just stop.
“Listen to me,” Jake starts, voice steady and commanding. “I don’t care if you’re an omega, or an alpha, or just Heeseung. It doesn’t matter. I love you because you’re you, not because of your second gender, not because you can or can’t pop a knot. I don’t care what people say about us or our relationship, I care about whether or not you’re happy.”
Heeseung only whimpers softly, eyes still brimming with tears, but not because he’s upset anymore. He doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know what he did to deserve someone like Jake.
“We have to get ready for your rut,” he continues, voice smooth as he holds onto Heeseung gentler like he doesn’t want to scare the alpha away. “Why don’t you nest for me, baby? Get comfy in here while I get some water and snacks ready for you, okay?”
Heeseung freezes, his breath stuttering in his throat as he looks up at Jake. “B-But…”
Jake hums, encouraging him to keep talking.
“Nesting is for omegas,” Heeseung finally says, quivering and shaking like a leaf.
The beta coos, bringing his hands up to run them over Heeseung’s arms. “If you want to nest, you should nest, baby. There’s nothing wrong with it, even if you’re an alpha. If it’ll make you feel comfortable and happy, then I want you to do it.”
Heeseung doesn’t say anything, but his heart swells and he breaks down into tears again, wrapping his arms around Jake’s shoulders and pulling him in for a hug. Even if it’s stuffy and hot beneath the sheets, Jake hugs him back, soothing him by brushing through the strands of his hair.
This is everything that he’s been hiding, everything that he’s repressed for so long. Even if Jake has known about his aversion to being an alpha, he hadn’t really assumed that Heeseung would want to be an omega, and Heeseung never told him. He’s long accepted the fact that he would never be anything but an alpha, but he’s been too ashamed to admit that he still wants to nest like an omega, still wants to be doted on during his rut like he’s an omega in heat.
Just wants to be soft, wants to let Jake take care of him. Wants to be accepted for who he is no matter what.
Jake kisses him on the lips, wiping a lone tear away. He lifts the covers from over their heads, still not letting go of Heeseung despite the fact that his skin is burning beneath Jake’s finger tips.
“If you need anything I’ll be in the kitchen, okay? Be good for me and show me how well you can nest,” he says, voice carrying something akin to pride. He leaves a lingering kiss on Heeseung’s lips again, smiling at him when Heeseung nods with a light sniffle, already moving to get out of the bed.
And then he’s alone in the room, standing in the middle of it like he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He’s never nested before, only seen it portrayed on TV and in different forms of media. It doesn’t come to him like second nature, doesn’t naturally happen. He does his best based on how it's been depicted, dumping their laundry basket and smelling each article of clothing. He picks the ones that are dowsed in his and Jake’s scent, the ones that are the softest.
He begins placing them on the bed, face burning in embarrassment. He’s not an omega, he shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t even want this, but he does. He wants it so badly that he feels like crying, has wanted it for longer than he can remember. He wipes his face, feeling stupid for getting emotional over such a small thing, but he never thought that he’d meet a partner like Jake, that he’d find somebody who would accept him no matter what.
He tucks shirts underneath pillows, creates a barrier of clothes, does whatever he can to make their bed flood with their scents. It’s a bit messy and definitely not perfect, but when he lays in the middle of the bed, Heeseung feels the tension drain from his body. Everything feels soft and cozy around him, a perfect mixture of them, enough to make him relax, to make all of the bad thoughts drift away.
It’s absolutely perfect.
“Wow,” Jake says once he walks in, arms filled with water bottles and protein bars. He places them all on the nightstand and watches as Heeseung rolls around happily, a smile on his once tearstricken face. “Your nest looks amazing. Did a good job, kitten.”
Heeseung preens at the praise, grasping Jake by the arm and pulling him. The moment his body hits the soft sheets, Heeseung is all over him, biting at his neck, kissing his lips. Jake can hardly keep up, but he giggles with each movement, arm coming up to naturally hold Heeseung by the waist, always keeping him close.
Their bare chests press against each other, and the heat in between them reminds Jake of the fact that Heeseung is seconds away from slipping into his rut. His scent is sharper now, a lot muskier than usual. Even though Heeseung doesn’t have an inherently bitter scent, it’s still strong, strong enough that it’s obvious when there’s been a drastic change. Jake notices it almost immediately, letting out a ragged breath when he feels Heeseung press his half hard length against him.
“Kitty,” he calls, hand curling on his waist to stop Heeseung from desperately rutting into him.
Heeseung doesn’t reply, almost like he’s already fallen under. His brain is heavy with lust and want, mind filled with desire. Jake looks so good like this, biting at his bottom lip like he’s already turned on by Heeseung, even when they haven’t done anything yet. It feels so validating, so powerful that the alpha doesn’t want to waste another second. He grinds his hips down against Jake’s, whining into his mouth when their clothed erections brush over each other.
“Let’s get these off of you,” Jake says, flipping them over and unbuttoning Heeseung’s pants, pulling them off alongside his boxers. With Heeseung on his back like this, Jake watches as his cock springs out, smearing copious amounts of precome all over his lower belly. He’s already so hard and swollen, already rutting in the air like that would do anything.
“J-Jake,” Heeseung whines, eyes already closing to prevent the tears from falling.
“I’ve got you,” Jake softly says, hand wrapping around Heeseung’s cock, slowly stroking it. His hand starts at the base, massaging the skin around it before he gathers all of the precome beading at the tip, using it to aid the glide of his palm. Heeseung whimpers quietly, like he’s already sensitive. “My sweet alpha, does it hurt?”
Heeseung inhales sharply, whining to himself as he hides behind his hands. “N-Not an alpha…” he says, voice tinged with embarrassment.
Jake freezes at the words, but doesn’t make a big show of it. He’s fine with calling Heeseung an omega, that doesn’t bother him, but what he can’t get enough of is how cute he looks. His eyes are glassy already, cheeks tinged red from embarrassment. He looks so soft, so beautiful and pliant that the beta doesn’t know what to do with himself.
He looks like he’s already deep into his rut, not knowing anything other than what his true instincts want.
Jake coos softly, hand still moving sloppily as the wet squelch fills the silence in between their low conversation. “My pretty omega, always so sweet for me. Tell me how you feel.”
Heeseung hides some more, embarrassed and ashamed but still feeling good about it. The way that Jake says omega does something to his brain, grounds him and makes him feel real and heard. “Hot all over,” he says, no more than a loud whisper. He can hardly speak, already succumbing to the mind altering state that his rut pulls him into.
“Need you. W-Want…” Heeseung tries, voice stuttering as he tries to contain his embarrassment. It’s impossible when his ears burn a bright red that tells Jake everything he needs to know. “Want your knot…” he finally says, absolutely humiliated.
Jake’s breath stops. He looks down at Heeseung, at how beautiful he looks like this, legs propped open, cock hard against his stomach. His eyes drift lower to his hole, cock twitching in his trousers as he watches it flutter around nothing.
He knows that, realistically, he can’t knot Heeseung, but he’d be damned if he doesn’t at least try to find a way.
“Can you present for me, omega?”
Heeseung whines, flipping around when Jake lets go of his cock. He doesn’t waste any time—doesn’t even really know how to do this—but he gets on all fours, laying his chest against the bed and propping his ass up. He spreads his knees apart a bit wider, swallowing thickly as he stutters, “P-Please give me your k-knot.”
Jake is on him in a matter of seconds, hands roaming the expanse of his ass, spreading him apart to get a better look. “So pretty like this, kitty,” he breathes lowly, grabbing the lube from the nightstand and flipping the cap open. He brings the tip of it to Heeseung’s hole, squeezing an ample amount inside of him.
“J-Jake,” Heeseung whimpers, closing his eyes as he feels Jake’s finger prod at his rim. He spreads the lube around like he’s in a trance, not caring about any of Heeseung’s noises or pleas. By the time his rim is almost fully coated, Jake is already pressing his finger in, groaning quietly at the warm heat surrounding him.
Heeseung’s eyes glimmer with the promise of tears, bottom lip jutting out in a pout as he rests his cheek against the pillow, arms folded beneath it. “ “I-It hurts. I need you.” His voice is small and meek, shaky as he tries to contain his tears, but Jake sees it all.
He knows exactly what Heeseung needs, what they both need, and he doesn’t want to waste any more time. He hums lowly, promising Heeseung that he’ll fuck him soon. He doesn’t take long with the prep, but he still drags it out an ample amount. He likes watching Heeseung squirm, watching him whine and beg and bite the pillow like all he can think about is being fucked and knotted.
When one finger turns into two and two into three, Heeseung only becomes messier. His cock leaks copious amounts of precome, and Jake can tell that it’s painful since the base has begun to swell with the promise of a knot. The lube shines where he has spread it all around his hole, glistening under the low lighting of the bedroom.
“Look at all this slick…” Jake says, almost like he’s in awe. “It’s okay, baby. It’s natural for omegas to slick during their heats.”
Heeseung stuffs his face into the pillow, whining shamelessly. His rut—no, his heat—fueled mind doesn’t allow him to think any differently. He doesn’t hide from it anymore, mind believing that he is slicking, that he’s an omega. His cock still feels too heavy though, too full, and he has a fleeting thought that he’d be better off without it—made to just take.
“Please, please,” Heeseung begs, barely able to get words out of his mouth, let alone loud enough for Jake to hear. “Don’t want it…”
Jake stops his movements. “What don’t you want, sweetheart? What is it?”
“K-Knot…it hurts. Aching…please…don’t want it,” he cries. It’s a few words barely stringed together in a sentence, but Jake understands perfectly. He knows exactly what Heeseung wants, and for that, Heeseung is grateful.
It’s been a long journey of figuring out his own boundaries, especially after mating with Jake and spending his ruts with him, but it’s always been like this. He’s always hated the feeling of his knot—hates the way it throbs, the way it aches. Doesn’t like the way it hinders his brains and makes him want to do things—alpha things—that he would never want to do. He doesn’t want to breed, doesn’t want to make an omega take it. The thought of knotting someone else causes him to let out a distressed sound, biting at the pillow as he cries louder, begging Jake some more.
He’s not made to knot. He doesn’t want it.
“Shh, it’s okay, omega. I’ve got you, trust me,” Jake says in an attempt to placate him. All rationale has gone out the window though, so Heeseung can only focus on the small swell at the base of his cock, the swell that’s a promise of something bigger.
Something inherently alpha.
“Trust me,” Jake repeats softly. He slowly slides his fingers out then, wiping them on the bedsheets before he’s reaching over Heeseung and pulling open the nightstand drawer. Heeseung watches him through teary eyes, sniffling softly to himself as Jake takes out his knot ring.
It’s similar to a cock ring, except its main purpose is to prevent knots from happening. Realistically, Heeseung can only use it so many times during his rut before he needs to pop a knot, and that’s usually when he’s nearing the end of his rut. The moments when he does need to knot, Jake always holds him through it, hand clamping down on the swollen base gently, sometimes pulsing around it to make the ache go away.
It’s embarrassing, but Heeseung is too far gone to care by now. He calms down when he feels Jake slide the ring over his cock, placing it snugly at the base where the knot had already begun to develop. It offers him enough relief that his whines and cries stop, body registering that he’s been given what he wanted. He mewls softly then, rubbing his cheek against the soft pillow beneath him as he feels Jake’s hands on the swell of his ass again.
“There we go, baby. Is it better now?” Jake asks, thumbing at his hole again and watching as copious amounts of lube causes everything to feel slippery.
“Uh-huh,” Heeseung hiccups. “B-Better.” He feels satisfied now, fully comfortable. His hole pulses and flutters and he wiggles his ass a bit, attempting to get Jake to do something. To make his pain go away.
“I won’t tease you. Want you to feel good, gonna scent you so you feel safe,” Jake whispers, tongue immediately roving over the scent glands on Heeseung’s neck. He’s true to his word and he doesn’t tease, bringing the tip of his cock to Heeseung’s hole, pushing it inside and stopping before he can fully breach him. “So much slick, gonna slide right in. Can’t even think about anything else right now,” he says, watching as the praise makes Heeseung preen and purr in pleasure.
He doesn’t waste anymore time, pushing in until he reaches the hilt, balls pressed against Heeseung’s ass. He lets out a sigh of relief, mind going blank at the feeling of the warm wetness surrounding him and sucking him in. It feels better than anything he’s ever felt before, pulses steadily around him, clenching and unclenching in an attempt to pull him in deeper.
“H-Hyung,” Heeseung cries, moaning when Jake presses their bodies closer together. He doesn’t even notice the honorific that’s slipped out, doesn’t realize how Jake’s breath hitches subtly before he lets out a low, shuddering groan. He doesn’t know anything around him except for the feeling of heat all along his skin and Jake’s cock stuffed snuggly inside of him.
“Hyung’s got you. Relax for me,” Jake says, attempting to get Heeseung to loosen up around him, to stop suffocating his cock like he really is an omega, biology be damned.
Heeseung sniffles softly, shifting a bit and allowing his legs to fall open even more. Jake hums appreciatively, placing a kiss on the back of his shoulder as he pulls his cock out and thrusts back in sharply.
He starts slow, still not meant to tease but rather to ease Heeseung into it. The drag of his cock against Heeseung’s tight and warm walls has them both moaning, Heeseung keening as he buries his face into the pillow. He feels consumed by Jake who is still shallowly moving his hips, feeding more of his cock into Heeseung with every thrust.
Jake splays a palm over Heeseung’s stomach, holding him tightly as he picks up the pace. Heeseung moans with every movement, body going completely soft as he allows all other thoughts to drift away, as he allows himself to belong solely to Jake.
“That’s a good omega. Presenting so prettily for hyung, doing so good,” he whispers, leaning all of his weight down on to Heeseung as he begins to properly fuck him. His warm breath tickles the back of Heeseung’s neck and he lets out a little sound—something in between a giggle and a sigh.
Everything feels so good. It’s truly unlike anything that Heeseung has ever experienced before and he allows himself to be indulgent for once, to just bask in something because it feels good. There’s no one else here, just him and Jake, and they both are too far gone to really care about anything else outside of this. Outside of each other.
Jake drives his hips in further, his pelvis hitting the flesh of Heeseung’s ass repeatedly. The tip of his cock hits Heeseung’s prostate again and again, allowing him no reprise or break from the pleasure. He takes, arching his back when Jake wants him to, spreading his legs wider when Jake pushes him down further, submitting completely.
“Hyung,” Heeseung cries, feeling the aching throb in his cock. His knot doesn’t form, but it’s still slightly swollen from where the ring is locked tightly around it. It hurts, but he doesn’t grind down against the sheets, doesn’t want Jake to touch him there, either.
“Gonna come, baby? Are you close?” Jake breathlessly asks, grunting lowly as he continues to plow into Heeseung. “Do it for me, sweetheart. Show me how good of an omega you can be.”
Heeseung whines loudly, crying as his vision is blurry from all of his tears. He helplessly mewls into the sheets, soaking the pillow beneath him. He starts moving his body, fucking himself back against Jake, screaming when his cock breaches him just right.
It doesn’t surprise Jake that Heeseung is already close. He’s been sensitive for the entire day, constantly stressed and on edge. Even if Jake has never experienced anything remotely close to an omega’s heat or an alpha’s rut, he knows that they make everything feel more intense. Senses are heightened, pleasure is ten times better, and he knows that Heeseung is going to be insatiable, that he needs to come at least once to fully fall into it.
“Hyung,” Heeseung moans when Jake hits that spot just right, holding Heeseung up by the hips and grinding into it, hips moving in slow circles, abusing it relentlessly. Jake can’t contain it as he mercilessly fucks into him, keeping him steady and driving him to euphoria.
His eyes land on Heeseung’s neck, on the way that the bite mark from earlier has blossomed into something pretty, into something undeniably them. He thinks about Heeseung’s words from earlier, his doubts about being mated and claimed, about it not being possible.
He thinks that he’d be a fool not to try.
Jake feels driven by instinct when he leans forward, pushing Heeseung down on the bed and collapsing on top of him. He doesn’t stop fucking him, doesn’t relent on the pace he’s set. Heeseung cries as he takes it all, biting on the pillow and burying his face in it. His cock throbs from where it’s pressed in between his belly and the bed, but he pays it no mind, instead focusing on the feeling of Jake on top of him, of his cock breaking past every barrier.
The beta growls lowly at the sound of Heeseung’s mewls, at the way that the tender flesh of his neck almost glows from how much he wants it. Jake can’t control himself, leading down and biting down hard enough that the unmistakable tang of blood fills his mouth. It’s messy and sloppy, a mixture of saliva and blood.
“You’re mine,” he says, thumb down on the bite, causing Heeseung to cry out. Jake gets a good look at his face, at the way the tears stream down his cheeks and his bottom lip quivers, cheeks flushed and pink, prettier than anything he’s ever seen.
“J-Jake—”
“Fuck, my omega. My good boy,” he says, absolutely gone. Heeseung doesn’t seem to be in any better condition, tightening up around his cock at the words, shamelessly moaning. His body is still hot all over, but Jake only makes him burn hotter. “Mine.”
Heeseung has been rendered speechless, body tensing as he squeezes his eyes shut and comes all over the sheets below him, crying out as his cock uselessly sputters out more and more come. Jake holds him through it, still fucking him as he chases his own high, hand wrapping around Heeseung’s throat, applying pressure as he bites into the other side of his neck.
“Hyung!”
“Say it,” Jake growls, unable to stop himself as he continues splaying Heeseung’s neck and marking it all up, leaving no room for error. Heeseung belongs to somebody, he belongs to Jake, and that would never change. “Come on, omega, say it.”
Heeseung whines, voice hoarse and raspy. It feels so good, so intense as Jake doesn’t let up on his neck, biting it and licking it, smearing blood all over skin. “Y-Yours. I’m yours!” He cries again, arching his back when he feels Jake’s hips stuttering and finally spilling inside of him, cock spurting out thick ropes of come that paint his walls.
“Take it. Take my knot, sweetheart. So fucking good, so wet around me, so tight for me” Jake mindlessly says, completely and utterly consumed by the feelings surrounding him.
“Yours, hyung. ‘M yours,” Heeseung babbles, repeating the words again and again like a broken record. He can’t stop it, can’t prevent the words from effortlessly slipping out and pulling him deeper down into his heat. He doesn’t know anything except for Jake and this—the feeling of them intertwined, bodies moving against each other desperately.
Jake’s teeth gnaw at his shoulder, breathless as his cock twitches inside of him. Heeseung tries to catch his breath, but each attempt just pulls out loud gasps, body already heating up again and cock hardening as he begins pushing back on Jake.
“Baby,” Jake says, holding Heeseung down and shuddering at the feeling of his sensitive cock still embraced in that warm heat. “I can’t, gotta pull out.”
“N-No!” Heeseung cries, clenching around his length, body begging him not to leave. “Please!”
The shake of his voice and the watery tone of it make Jake coo softly, pulling out slowly despite all of Heeseung’s protesting. When he’s finally freed from the addicting warmth, Jake slowly and gently slips Heeseung over, gulping at the way his come leaks out, making a mess in between his legs. As his eyes roam further up, he sees Heeseung’s swollen cock, laying hard against his stomach in the sticky mess of his come. The tip glistens, leaking precome pathetically.
“Hyung,” Heeseung continues, shaking his head as he attempts to turn his head to the side and hide his face in the pillow. “Need more—” he hiccups, bottom lip trembling in a way that makes Jake want to kiss him.
“I know. I’m sorry, omega,” he says softly, leaning down and connecting their lips. Heeseung is barely lucid enough to kiss back, instead just opening his mouth and allowing Jake to lick inside of it. It’s messy with way too much spit, but they both still love it anyways, moaning into it as they get lost in the taste of one another. “I’ll take care of you, baby. Hyung’s got you.”
Heeseung lets out a loud whine when Jake’s hand moves in between his legs, fingers prodding at his hole as he slides one in, the sound of the wetness downright sinful. “So wet, so much slick,” Jake says, almost like he’s in some sort of trance. He scoops out a good amount of his come, bringing it up to Heeseung’s mouth expectantly.
Jake doesn’t even need to say anything. Almost like it’s instinctual, Heeseung opens his mouth, tongue lolling out as moans, opening his eyes that are wet with tears and looking up at him pleadingly. Jake groans, laying his fingers on Heeseung’s tongue and watching as his lips immediately close around them, lightly sucking lazily like it’s all he’s made for. His eyes slowly close, almost like he’s in a daze that he can’t quite snap out of. He makes small, contented noises, humming softly as his tongue licks everything up, savoring the bitter flavor of Jake’s come.
“So good for me,” Jake comments offhandedly, watching as Heeseung preens at the affection.
They stay like that for a bit longer, but eventually, Heeseung’s arousal becomes too much for him to bear and he’s whining again, begging for Jake to fuck him again. He shushes him lightly, an attempt to placate him as he moves further down his body, setting Heeseung’s thighs on his shoulders as he comes face to face with his hole, shiny with lube and leaking come.
He lets out a sigh, thumb coming up to smear his come all around Heeseung’s rim. “Smells so perfect, baby. Sweet like cotton candy, my omega. Your slick—”
“Hyung!” Heeseung moans out, voice sounding utterly embarrassed and humiliated. But Jake watches as another bead of precome dribbles down his cock, displaying just how good he feels. Complete, undeniable pleasure, only like this for Jake.
“It’s sweet, isn’t it?” And then he’s moving closer, licking a stripe over Heeseung’s hole. “Sweet enough to be addicting,” he says, lost in a lust filled haze as he brings his fingers up to his hole, spreading him open just enough to see how he pulses, how his come leaks out in fat globs. He can’t help it, ignoring Heeseung’s whines as he licks at the area again and again, doing so until his tongue slips inside.
Heeseung moans loudly, hands landing in Jake’s hair and pulling him in impossibly closer. It’s primal, the way that Heeseung shamelessly grinds against Jake, moaning loudly like he’s never wanted anything more. His cock bobs on his stomach with each movement, throbbing painfully as he chases his release. He can’t think—can’t even speak, too concerned with his own pleasure, with the feeling of Jake’s tongue prodding around his rim and sinking inside time and time again.
Jake is relentless in his assault, shoving his tongue in deeper, using a finger in order to prod over Heeseung’s prostate. He keeps going, moaning at the way Heeseung cries and whines, tightening his hold on him, pulling so close that he feels like he’s being suffocated. It doesn’t matter, it never matters. Jake would gladly die like this, mind and body only consumed by Heeseung, his omega being the only thing that’s important to him.
He drags his tongue all along Heeseung’s walls, feeling him clench around him, body arching as he moans high and loud. Each moan comes out in stuttered gasps, each one accompanied by a tight pull of Jake’s hair, wanting more, always so greedy.
Jake hums, squeezing Heeseung’s thigh lightly as he continues his ministrations. He locks everything up like a man possessed, finger punching in and out of him at the same time. Each push and pull drives Heeseung closer to the edge, body overly sensitive from the heat mixed with the feeling of his knot throbbing within the constraints of the ring. It doesn’t bother him, shoved to the back of his head as Jake lightly brushes his finger over his prostate, tongue swirling around it, too.
He begins pushing his ass against Jake’s face, chasing his own release as he clenches the bedsheets between his fists. The feeling of Jake’s warm spit mixed with all of the lube and come creates a messy splash zone, a mixture of everything running down Heeseung’s thighs and pooling on the bed beneath them.
“H-Hyung!” Heeseung cries, toes curling, body shaking and trembling with the need to come.
Jake notices, just like he always does, and pulls away, watching the way Heeseung’s hole glistens with his come and now his spit too, groaning quietly as he feels his cock twitch, already half hard again.
Heeseung is barely coherent, barely holding on. His eyes are glossed over in pleasure, fully under and lost in his submission. Jake has never seen him this far gone before, has never experienced him floating in such deepness before.
It’s mesmerizing.
He finds that Heeseung looks beautiful like this, eyes glassy, mouth hanging open as he pants, breathing out little sounds that pull Jake in further, begging him for more. His cock is flushed, leaking and aching, knot wanting to swell but not being able to. Further down, he sees the mess in between his thighs, and he thrusts two fingers inside mindlessly, not teasing as he immediately allows the pads of them to graze over his sensitive spot, causing Heeseung to jolt with a cry.
The feeling around his fingers is addicting, Heeseung pulsing around him, sucking him in deeper. More importantly, Jake notices how receptive Heeseung is to this, how sensitive it is when he repeatedly massages over his prostate again and again.
“Ah–!” Heeseung moans, arching his back when Jake drives his fingers in deeper, not letting up on his assault.
He rubs small circles over it and applies pressure over it, wringing out moan after moan.
It’s an intense feeling for Heeseung, unlike something he’s ever felt before. He doesn’t know how to control his sounds, doesn’t know how to control his body, but he doesn’t care, can’t even think about any of that right now. All he feels is wave after wave of mind numbing pleasure, body contracting and relaxing with each stroke.
“More, please more,” he cries, eyes clenching shut when Jake pushes a bit harder, pulling his fingers out for a second to add one more.
“So good for me, pretty. Pussy’s taking it so well,” Jake says, not thinking before the words leave his mouth. “So soft, so slick.”
Heeseung makes a sound that Jake has never heard from him before, a high pitched moan that cuts off into a whine and eventually ends with his entire body trembling. He claws at Jake as he arches his back further, babbling something and attempting to shift his position.
“Wanna….” he tries, unable to form the words to say what he wants. Jake slows down, letting off of his prostate in an attempt to understand what he’s saying. Heeseung keeps repeating the same word over and over again, trying to speak but crying when he’s not able to.
Jake can’t help but to think about how pretty he looks when there are tears streaming down his face and staining his cheeks.
“Shhh, what is it, baby? What’s wrong?”
Heeseung doesn’t seem to even hear him, too caught up in trying to articulate what he wants.
“Heeseung,” Jake says, voice firm and commanding. It works well to gain his attention, bottom lip quivering as he attempts to keep the tears at bay. “Tell hyung what’s wrong. Come on, kitty,” he soothingly says, bringing his free hand up to Heeseung’s thigh and rubbing over it in a way that soothes him.
His touch seems to calm the alpha down, and he takes a deep breath. “W-Wanna present for hyung. Wanna be good…” he whimpers, trailing off before he continues, “Wanna show my…my p-pussy,” he finishes, stuttering over the word like he’s never said it before. Like it’s something taboo.
It’s all so cute, Jake can barely contain himself. He coos softly, leaning down to press a comforting kiss against Heeseung’s lips. At the angle, his fingers shift in deeper, pressing harder on Heeseung’s prostate.
“Hyung!”
Jake chuckles lightly. “Sorry, baby.”
Heeseung lets out a huff, but giggles anyways when Jake places a flurry of kisses all over his face. Each feather light kiss is gentle yet burns across his skin in a fury of flames, leaving him aching and wanting more. Jake realizes that he’s getting antsy again and pulls his fingers out slowly, holding Heeseung by the waist and helping him roll over onto his stomach.
“Look so pretty when you present for me. Such a good omega. Pretty pussy, too,” Jake says, watching the way that the alpha falls apart at the words, whining in embarrassment as his cheeks flush pink.
He instantly melts into the mattress, rubbing his face over the pillow again, and it takes Jake this long to realize that he’s been running his face against his pillow. Jake’s heart flutters, assuming that the pillow is doused in his own scent and that’s why Heeseung is so obsessed with it, whether that be smelling it or rubbing against it or even biting it. It’s all so endearing, and for a minute, Jake feels all of the love that he has for Heeseung swelling up, lodging itself right in his heart.
“Heeseung,” he calls lightly, hands running all over his ass. “I love you, baby.”
The way that Heeseung melts even further into the sheets is too cute, but the light moan he lets out is cuter. He’s shy and bashful, and even when he’s trying to hide, Jake can see that there’s still a pink flush dusted over his cheeks.
“I love you, too,” Heeseung mumbles. “Love you, hyung.”
Jake places a kiss on one of his shoulders, lips warm and tender over the area. Heeseung makes a contented noise, head filled with all of the love. He’s barely thinking about anything other than the want that continues to persist under his skin, but he still feels the love flooding over him, the connection that they have and the bond that they’ve formed. A part of him thinks that this feeling—this dearness that they hold for each other—is much better than any bond that a mating mark could create.
They aren’t led by the fact that they aren’t mated, and they aren’t led by what society says they should be. Jake doesn’t care that he can’t mark Heeseung, their love surpasses any of that. Their love surpasses all of that.
“I’m going to ease back in, omega,” Jake quietly says, not wanting to scare him. “Gonna make you feel good again.”
And he does. The second that those fingers are pressed against his prostate again, rubbing down on it over and over again, Heeseung cries out, moaning at the way that Jake can twist them even deeper, more incessantly.
He’s been holding on for so long and his cock feels so full, but what washes over him isn’t a typical orgasm. It’s something much more intense, mind altering pleasure that causes him to seize up, burying his face into the sheets as his entire body trembles.
“Come for hyung, baby. Let go,” Jake whispers, milking Heeseung’s prostate, not letting up.
Heeseung’s entire body shakes, orgasm starting from his pelvis and consuming his entire body. His cock feels sensitive, but Jake doesn’t touch it and Heeseung doesn’t either, solely focused on the overwhelming pressure racking through his body.
“Show me how you can squirt,” Jake says, voice heady with lust as he overstimulates the spot mercilessly. “Let me see you squirt, omega.”
Heeseung screams when it hits him, groaning loudly as his entire body is consumed in pleasure. Those words push him over the edge, cock spurting out thick ropes of come pathetically. It’s the most intense thing he’s ever felt, each breath pushing out more and more fluid. It’s unlike his normal come, a completely different feeling and orgasm, but it feels just as good, if not better. It steals every thought, replacing everything with only the feeling of Jake’s fingers, the feeling of his release dampening the sheets beneath him.
He can’t help it when he collapses, thoughts shaking and shuddering as he hits the sheets, tears streaming down his cheeks. His entire body feels so sensitive, trembling from the after shocks of his orgasm.
Jake works to soothe him, gently pulling his fingers out before bringing the tip of his cock to the opening of his hole, lightly pressing in. Heeseung cries out when he pushes all the way in, clinging on to the bedsheets like a lifeline.
“Hyung—” Heeseung sobs, cutting himself off with a loud moan when Jake presses his body down on top of him, hips jackhammering into him.
“Fuck, pussy’s so good, kitty,” he says, lost in a trance, only focused on wringing out one last orgasm from Heeseung. His rut is far from over, but he can tell that Heeseung is starting to need a break, that he needs some sleep. He just wants to make sure that Heeseung goes to sleep filled, that he’s leaking and sore by the time he wakes up—inevitably ready to go again. “Never gonna let you go.”
Heeseung whines at that, wanting nothing more than the same. Jake noses at his neck again, and before he knows it, Heeseung is crying out in pain, moaning at the same time that those teeth sink into his neck again, drawing more blood. It’s mind altering, the state that he’s in, so far down that he knows nothing else outside of Jake.
He knows that he has no chance of lasting for very long, but he can’t coherently think enough to tell Jake. The pleasure goes to his head, slightly aided by the pain that’s forming at the base of his cock, knot needing some sort of release. Despite the ring, he needs it so badly that it becomes uncomfortable, and he doesn’t have enough energy to oppose it, not when he knows that it won’t change anything—it won’t make Jake think any differently of him.
“H-Hyung,” he whimpers, hips now rutting pathetically against the bed, attempting to stimulate any sort of friction. His knot is heavy, begging to form properly, and it makes Heeseung’s mind feel numb—numb enough that he can’t speak coherently. “H-Hurts.” He’s sure that the base of his cock is an angry red by now, dark and swollen.
“Sweet boy, what is it?” Jake grunts, lips right next to his ear as his hips don’t stop moving. He seems to notice what Heeseung is doing, what he’s trying to achieve. “Does baby need relief? Is that it, omega?”
Heeseung hiccups, “Please.”
Jake coos, watching as he rubs his cheek against the pillow again. He crams his hand in between Heeseung’s body and the bed, pulling the ring off of his cock. Heeseung lets out a relieved sound, crying loudly when Jake clamps his hand around the slowly forming bulge, squeezing down and pulsing around it as tightly as he can.
The alpha sobs at the feeling, moaning loudly each time that Jake squeezes harder, each time he drives his hips in deeper. It’s so much and so intense, and Heeseung can’t last, not really like this.
“Omega, pretty omega,” Jake says, out of it as well. He loses control, only focused on Heeseung’s pleasure, on his sounds, on the heat surrounding his cock. He can’t stop, ruthlessly fucking into him with fervor, listening to the sounds of his cries and groaning along with him. He can’t help it when he pulls Heeseung back up by the hips, forcing him on his cock again and again.
Heeseung wails when Jake releases his knot, crying and begging for him to hold it again, to hold him as he comes. He can’t form a sentence, let alone say the words, but Jake recognizes the sounds of distress, shushing him lightly as one of his hands is back around his cock again, doing the same movements as before. He feels the base of Heeseung’s cock swelling in his hand, getting big enough that it makes Heeseung feel heavy and so full.
He’s full everywhere. Jake’s cock fills him up deliciously, stretching him open and abusing over his sensitive prostate, wringing out wrecked moan after wrecked moan. Heeseung’s voice has gone hoarse by now, cracking slightly with every sound. He’s so gone, so ruined, and so so beautiful. Completely perfect like this, completely at Jake’s mercy, hand around his knot and cock fucking him as deep as humanely possible.
Jake’s teeth ache. He watches as Heeseung’s head falls forward, hanging between his shoulders. His neck looks beautiful like this, marked and bruised, marred all over with the shape of his bite. He can’t resist, leaning down and taking the flesh in between his teeth once again. It’s an addicting sensation, something he can’t let go of—something he never wants to let go of. Heeseung looks undeniably perfect, undeniably his.
“J-Jake,” Heeseung shudders, orgasm wracking through his body again, knot locked to its full size as he spills all over the sheets, coming so hard that his vision goes black. His thighs shake again, body stuttering as he cries out, desperately rutting into Jake’s hand, the feeling of his swollen knot being suffocated only edging him on further.
He clenches around Jake’s cock, whining again and again. Jake feels his own orgasm approaching, taking over his body as he stills and spills inside of Heeseung, whispering to him quietly.
“Good omega, perfect boy. So good for me,” he says, running his hand over Heeseung’s raw cock, other hand still not letting go of his knot. As soon as he lets go of Heeseung’s hip, he falls forward, face smashing against the pillow as he cries from the intensity. Jake’s hand gets stuck in between his body and the mattress, but he doesn’t care, hand never letting up.
Heeseung whimpers and cries, rutting his hips desperately, babbling tired words. Jake groans, cock still spurting come, filling Heeseung up to the brim. He can’t stop moving his hips, can’t stop fucking into him, even as Heeseung begs, saying that he’s sensitive. Jake has a hunger that he is unable to satisfy, hellbent on keeping Heeseung split on his cock, filled with his come, surrounded by his scent, and bite marks littered all over his neck.
“Please…” Heeseung whimpers, body entirely soft except for his knot and his cock which is still hard, but Jake can see the fatigue washing over him, can see that he’s tired. He’s barely lucid—hardly coherent as he pleads with Jake, finally convincing him to stop once he’s finished coming.
“I’ve got you, baby. Did so good for me, the best omega,” he says, kissing behind Heeseung’s ear as he slowly eases him down onto the bed again, turning them both on their sides and not pulling out yet. He doesn’t let go of his cock either, fully intent on holding his knot until it goes down.
He wraps his arms around Heeseung, still praising him as he rubs his face against his scent glands, wanting Heeseung to be surrounded by him. Heeseung mewls, sighing constantly. Jake’s fresh scent and the nest he’s made keeps him under, so far under that he doesn’t realize that Jake is speaking to him.
“H-Huh?”
Jake giggles softly, nosing at his neck. His breath is soft, feather light and warm against the flushed and bitten skin. “I asked if you want to fall asleep on my cock. If you wanna cockwarm me like a good omega.”
Heeseung moans lightly. “Wanna be good…good omega.”
“Perfect. My perfect omega,” Jake says, cooing softly as he brings his free hand up to Heeseung’s scalp, running his finger tips through the thick strands of hair. “I love you,” he continues, just because he can. Just because he wants Heeseung to hear it.
“Love you,” Heeseung replies, zero hesitation in his voice. “Love you so much…” he says, repeating it to himself again and again until his breath eventually evens out and he falls asleep, body satisfied for now, full and warm.
His rut continues like that, each orgasm being drawn out of him with care and love. Jake indulges in every fantasy, does everything that Heeseung asks of him without question. When they finally reach the end of it, Jake cleans up the sheets and the nest, leading Heeseung to the shower and washing him thoroughly. He massages sore limbs and soothes raw bites, Heeseung floating through the entire process in dazed happiness.
He doesn’t have to think, doesn’t have to struggle. He just has to exist, and Jake will take care of everything else, just like he always does.
Except this time, he knows every side of Heeseung, even the one that he’s convinced himself he needs to be ashamed of.
Jake isn’t ashamed of him—isn’t ashamed to continue loving him and caring for him, providing him with every need necessary. He doesn’t judge, he never judges. He’s there, a steady presence constantly reminding Heeseung that he’s enough, that he’s perfect. He doesn’t need to put on an act anymore, doesn’t need to listen to what other people have to say about their relationship. Jake doesn’t let him have doubts, doesn’t let him spiral, always there to reassure him gently.
And throughout it all, he never stops calling him omega.
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