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Chi Cheng opened the door quietly, not because he was trying to be stealthy, but because the pain in his chest made every movement feel heavier.
He saw Suowei on the bed with his head bowed, attention fixed on the open book in his lap. Balanced across his hand, with delicate poise and curious motion, was Little Jealousy, his smooth body coiling and unwinding slowly across Suowei’s knuckles like he trusted him completely.
The air inside the room was warm and still, but Chi Cheng felt his throat tighten as if a wind had passed through him.
“Venomous snakes have pointed noses, non venomous have rounded noses.” Wu Suo Wei reads in his head before glancing down at the little snake.
“You don't look venomous to me, but your dad would know for sure.” He thinks to himself, his chest tightening as he thinks about his boyfriend not being home, unaware he is standing in the doorway to their room.
"But at least I know for sure you like your dad's scent" He adds as he glances at the rolled up black sleeve of his boyfriend’s shirt over his wrist.
Chi Cheng stood there longer than he intended to, watching the simple gentleness in the way Suowei held the snake, the way he glanced at the page and then down again to Little Jealousy as if trying to make a connection between word and creature.
His heart tightened even more at the sight.
He had been so careless.
The past few days had been a blur of missteps and emotional silence. The reappearance of Wang Shuo had stirred something he should have buried long ago. He hadn’t meant to let it linger. But he had. He’d let it hang in the air, poisoning Suowei’s already fragile sense of safety. He knew what Wang Shuo represented, he knew how deep Suowei's insecurities ran. And instead of confronting it, instead of holding Suowei tightly and saying the words he knew Suowei needed to hear, he had let the past walk beside him like a ghost.
Chi Cheng exhaled slowly. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him with a soft click, like sealing something off.
Suowei hears it but he doesn't look up from his book because he isn't ready to see if Chi Cheng is drunk again because of his ex.
Chi Cheng crossed the room, drawn forward by guilt. He came to the edge of the bed and reached for the book in Suowei’s lap. His fingers brushed over Suowei’s as he gently lifted it from his grasp.
“What’s this?” he murmured.
“Just something I ordered a while ago.” Wu Suo Wei answers. His voice was low and could almost be passed off as being low from just tiredness if it wasn't for the way he kept his head bent down and how his eyes lingered on the place his and Chi Cheng's hands briefly touched.
The title met Chi Cheng's eyes. ‘A Practical Care Guide for Small Reptiles: Snakes’, in particular. His throat went tight.
A pained smile broke across his face. It wasn’t the book itself that filled him with pain, but what it meant, that Suowei, despite everything, despite the coldness between them these last few days, had still cared. He had taken the time to understand this creature that Chi Cheng adored.
He set the book aside gently and lowered himself onto the edge of the bed. His hand reached out almost without thought, brushing against Suowei’s cheek. He tilted Suowei’s face up toward his just enough to meet his eyes.
Wu Suo Wei's breathing hitched unnoticeable as his cheek was caressed. He tried his best to push them down, but he could feel his insecurities and vulnerabilities color his eyes.
Chi Cheng noticed it and he wanted to erase that look, replace it with something warm.
“I miss you.” he said quietly, thumb brushing along Suowei’s jaw.
“I missed you too.” Wu Suo Wei says. He's tempted to lean into the caress but decides to remain still.
Between them, the snake moved again. He coiled across Suowei’s wrist and then trailed his silken body downward.
He moved with elegance, his pale body tracing a sinuous path across the delicate plane of Suowei’s chest. He followed the gentle slope of his sternum, his narrow head weaving slowly downward toward the soft terrain of Suowei's stomach.
Other than moving his head a little, Wu Suo Wei kept still and let Little Jealousy map his body. “The way you move over my body feels a lot like how your dad touches me.” Wu Suo Wei thinks as he follows Little Jealousy's path. He knows his thought is a bit weird, but it doesn't feel wrong since he always saw the little snake as an extension of his boyfriend.
Chi Cheng’s pulse ticked hard beneath his skin. There was something achingly intimate in what he was witnessing, not just Suowei lying there, vulnerable and pliant but the way he allowed his snake to explore him.
Chi Cheng moved in slowly, sliding onto the bed. The mattress dipped, shifting them both subtly closer. His knee pressed beside Suowei’s hip, and his fingers trailed along the curve of his side.
Wu Suo Wei returns his focus to Chi Cheng immediately.
Meanwhile Chi Cheng's eyes stayed locked on the snake, watching his slow descent, and an idea bloomed in his mind.
He leaned down, breath brushing across Suowei’s throat, “Stay still for me.”
Wu Suo Wei’s blush deepens at Chi Cheng's warm breath going intimately over his throat and he hums a noise of understanding as he curls his fingers around the silk sheets below his hands.
Then Chi Cheng reached for the snake. His fingers coaxed him up from the shallow dip of Suowei’s waist, letting him curl around his hand. The snake wrapped loosely around his fingers.
Wu Suo Wei smiles mentally as he watches Little Jealousy make himself comfortable on Chi Cheng's hand.
Then, Chi Cheng lowered him down.
He let the snake slide from his fingertips back onto Suowei’s skin, guiding it softly across the sensitive edge of Suowei’s pelvis, where skin turned thinner and nerves lived closer to the surface.
Wu Suo Wei's smile turns into a note not to move.
“Good.” he whispered, letting his lips brush just beside Suowei’s ear, “He likes you.”
Wu Suo Wei can feel his boyfriend's smile and how pleased he is that he is being good, he trembles as his cock jumps up in his underwear. He wants to moan and beg for more, but the divide between him and Chi Cheng these last few days leave him quiet.
The snake continued his careful glide and Chi Cheng followed the path with his lips, pressing soft kisses just above where the snake traveled, mouth brushing in tandem with the trail of scales.
Wu Suo Wei moans under his breath as he gives into the affection he's been starved of the past few days. While mentally telling himself to be prepared for this to be one of the last times he has his boyfriend's attention.
Chi Cheng lets Little Jealousy slither once more across the narrow trail of skin leading just beneath the waistband of Suowei’s pants and then he lifts the snake again, guiding him to the edge of the blanket.
He turned back to Suowei and Chi Cheng leaned over him, cupping his face in both hands now.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said.
Enclosed under his boyfriend's body while being told he is beautiful, snaps something inside Wu Suo Wei.
Then Chi Cheng kissed him. His body settled against Suowei’s, fitting perfectly into the lines he now knew by instinct.
Wu Suo Wei doesn't know if what snapped in him is a good thing or a bad thing as he drowns in the feeling of being kissed,.
Everything in Chi Cheng was saying the same thing, over and over again:
I want you. I’m here. I chose you.
Tears stream down Wu Suo Wei's cheeks as he hears the words through his boyfriend's kiss.
Chi Cheng barely registered the trembling hands at his waist before he felt the wet slip down Suowei’s cheek and touch the corner of his mouth.
He pulled back.
And then he saw them.
The tears.
The soft streams carving paths down the sides of Suowei’s flushed face, catching in the curve of his jaw, soaking into the hollow of his neck. And it gutted Chi Cheng. It tore straight through every defense, every excuse, every lie he’d let himself believe in the last few days.
Chi Cheng couldn’t breathe.
“WeiWei…” he choked out, voice breaking open like a split seam. “Oh, my Baobei…”
Wu Suo Wei hears Little Jealousy hissing aggressively and it takes him a minute to understand that the little snake is laid out over his shoulder and hissing not at him, but at Chi Cheng because the snake believes him to be in distress.
Wu Suo Wei looks up at his boyfriend through his tears. “Do you mean it, Chi Cheng?” He asks, his voice holding back a sob as he takes his hands off the sheets and hovers them by Chi Cheng's hips. Unsure whether to grab hold or let his hands fall down and just accept what he is being given tonight as the best he can hope for.
Chi Cheng reached for him with hands that suddenly felt too big, too clumsy to touch something as fragile as this. But he did it anyway, his palms came up slowly, cupping Suowei’s face with aching care, brushing his thumbs across wet cheeks, again and again, as if he could undo the damage with touch alone.
Wu Suo Wei sobs, and his tears stream down his face. He can't stop them and his skin stays wet with them even as his boyfriend painstakingly and tenderly brushes each new stream off.
“Chi..Cheng..” Wu Suo Wei sobs out as he keeps crying. His voice broken yet laced with his last strands of hope for a future with the man he loves.
Chi Cheng’s stomach dropped. He felt something in himself shatter so violently that for a moment he didn’t know how to hold it all together.
He leaned in and pressed his forehead to Suowei’s.
“I mean it,” he said “I mean it baby.”
Noises of held back heartache and desires for everything to be real break out over Wu Suo Wei's trembling lips as he absorbs the heat of Chi Cheng's skin into his forehead where they are connected.
Chi Cheng pulled back just enough to see him, really see him and he hated himself. Hated that he hadn’t just broken Suowei’s trust, but that he’d let him feel alone inside the one place that was supposed to be safe.
“You don’t know,” Chi Cheng said, shaking, “how much I hate myself for what I’ve done to you. I hate it. Every second I pulled away from you, every time I didn’t say the right thing, every night you looked at me like I wasn’t coming back. I knew. I knew what I was doing, and I still did it.”
Wu Suo Wei's hands hovering by Chi Cheng's hips shake as he takes in the guilt riddled confession from his boyfriend.
He brushed more tears from Suowei’s cheeks and kissed the corner of his mouth, then lower along his jaw.
“I am such an idiot.” he whispered into his skin.
“Yes you are…” Wu Suo Wei replies. It's all he can say as his throat tightens.
Chi Cheng looked over and found him. Little Jealousy. Coiled like a sentinel across Suowei’s shoulder, his tiny body tense with fury. The little snake’s tongue flicked rapidly, sensing the emotion and it had chosen a side.
A second hiss. Then the snake struck a bite, not deep, but enough to sting against the skin of Chi Cheng’s arm.
He didn’t pull away.
He deserved it.
Are you okay? Wu Suo Wei asks in his head as he sees blood form from the bite Little Jealousy left on Chi Cheng's arm.
Another hiss. Then Little Jealousy coiled back over Suowei’s arm protectively, never taking his eyes off Chi Cheng.
“You don't have to hurt him, I don't like when he is hurt.” Wu Suo Wei whispers to Little Jealousy with an edge of protective scolding for his boyfriend's safety and well being in his voice.
Chi Cheng turned back to Suowei, gently gathering his trembling hands from where they hovered, and placed them firmly on his waist. Wu Suo Wei grabs on with intentions of never letting go.
“I need you to hear me. And believe me.” Chi Cheng starts.
“I’m here. Now. Fully. Not with one foot in the past. Not with doubts in my heart. I am here because you are who I want.”
He swallowed, throat tight.
“You are not second-best. You’re not someone I’m settling for. You’re not just a place to land when I’m tired. You’re the one I would crawl back to if the world ended.”
His voice cracked again.
“You are my choice. My home."
Wu Suo Wei kept anything he wanted to say behind his quivering lips. As he ached to comfort Chi Cheng every time he paused and his voice cracked with his own pain at the brokenness of their relationship.
Chi Cheng kissed him again, so gently it felt like an apology and a prayer.
And when he pulled back, his thumbs still resting on Suowei’s wet cheeks, he said:
“I will spend the rest of my life proving that.”
“If you are lying, if you go back on a single thing you just said. I won't be your home anymore..." Wu Suo Wei says, his voice is wrecked, but then he puts his hands into Chi Cheng's hair and pulls him down for a kiss.
There was salt on his lips from the tears, and Chi Cheng kissed him like he was trying to undo every drop of it.
His hands ran up Suowei’s sides, mapping familiar terrain like it was the first time. He kissed down his cheek, then to the corner of his jaw, then beneath it.
Wu Suo Wei's hands clung to Chi Cheng's hair as he moved from kissing him back to kissing his cheek, his jaw, and the curve of his face just under his jaw.
He felt Chi Cheng's love and he felt Little Jealousy’s protectiveness of him as he coiled around his arm ready to strike out at Chi Cheng again if he felt it was necessary.
That’s when Chi Cheng noticed it.
The fabric beneath his palms. The way it bunched gently at Suowei’s waist. He pulled back just slightly, eyes drifting down and his breath caught.
It was his shirt.
Slightly oversized on Suowei’s slimmer frame, the faint scent of Chi Cheng’s cologne still clinging to the cotton.
Something broke in him all over again.
“You’re wearing my shirt.” he murmured, half dazed.
“Hmmm. It smells like you, so I put it on to have you with me…and I increased my bond with Little Jealousy.” when you weren't actually here. He doesnt finish that sentence.
Chi Cheng let out a low, aching sound and bent down to kiss him again, harder this time, cupping the back of his neck and deepening the kiss until their chests touched and he could feel Suowei’s heartbeat against his ribs.
Wu Suo Wei sighs into the kiss, his heartbeat is loud in his ears as his emotions tint with desire for more closeness.
“I love you in my clothes,” Chi Cheng whispered between kisses. “But I need to take it off now.”
A tiny moan leaves Wu Suo Wei's mouth and he senses Little Jealousy moving up his arm as he lets go of Chi Cheng's hair so he can be undressed.
Chi Cheng caresses up slowly over the warm skin, when he got his hands to his shoulders, he pushed the fabric off slowly letting Little Jealousy slither over it onto new expanses of exposed skin.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said, reverently. “Even when you cry. Even when you’re angry. Even when you think you’re not enough, I’ve never wanted anything the way I want you.”
Wu Suo Wei bends his head down to look at himself and he doesn't completely believe he is as beautiful as his boyfriend says he is, but he knows he likes how his body feels at being praised.
Little Jealousy lifted his small head and flicked his tongue in the air, sensing Chi Cheng’s closeness. He didn’t hiss this time. Just watched.
Chi Cheng met his gaze and arched an eyebrow.
Little Jealousy responded with a flick of his tail and shifted position, then did something unexpected: he slithered between them and coiled once around Suowei’s naked thigh like a ring of protection.
“Are you my little garter snake, Little Jealousy?” Wu Suo Wei asks with humor in his voice as his eyes color with a feeling of empowerment at having something so unique decorating his thigh.
“I won’t hurt him.” Chi Cheng promised quietly, not just to Suowei, but to the creature who had taken it upon himself to guard him.
Wu Suo Wei bops Little Jealousy’s nose with the pad of his index finger.
Chi Cheng lowered himself back down, lips brushing over Suowei’s collarbone, then over the dip where his neck met shoulder. Every inch of him, Chi Cheng touched like it was the first time, like rediscovery.
Wu Suo Wei puts his feet on the bed and spreads his legs to move Little Jealousy away from Chi Cheng while putting his arms and hands on his boyfriend's back.
Chi Cheng could still feel the guilt and it made him want to be careful, to be soft, to show Suo Wei with every touch that he wasn’t going anywhere this time.
His gaze flickered to Little Jealousy, the small snake coiled around Suo Wei’s thigh like a living band of protection, his tiny head tilting as if still assessing Chi Cheng.
Chi Cheng's hands were moving to his own clothes now. He tugged off his shirt first, pulling it over his head. His pants followed next, kicking them off along with his boxers until he was as bare as Suo Wei.
Their bodies aligning now, skin brushing skin as he settled between his legs, careful not to disturb Little Jealousy’s protective hold.
He leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to the center of Suo Wei’s chest, right over his racing heartbeat, then trailed his lips lower.
“You’re everything, Weiwei,” he whispered against Suo Wei’s skin. “I’m so sorry for ever making you doubt that.”
Wu Suo Wei closes his eyes to keep new tears from streaming down his face at Chi Cheng's apology.
“Chi Cheng, right now...I don't want to hear you are sorry...just make me feel that I'm everything you say I am.” Wu Suo Wei pleads softly.
Chi Cheng obliged.
His lips moved to the dip of Suo Wei’s stomach, kissing there gently.
Little Jealousy shifted again, his cool scales brushing against Chi Cheng’s side as he adjusted, slithering a bit higher on Suo Wei’s thigh, almost as if nudging closer to witness every move being made. Chi Cheng glanced at the little snake, a faint chuckle escaping him.
“You’re a nosy little thing, aren’t you?” he muttered, but there was no malice in it. He stroked a finger once more along the snake’s coiled form before turning his focus back to Suo Wei.
Wu Suo Wei eyes held a fond smile as he watched Chi Cheng and Little Jealousy have their first soft moment since Chi Cheng entered the bedroom. His lower body burns hotter than ever and his cock throbs when he sees his boyfriend's attention is back on him.
His hands slid up Suo Wei’s thighs now, parting them just a bit more as he settled himself closer. He reached for the small bottle of lube he’d set aside earlier, slicking his fingers first and warming the liquid between them before touching him as he eased one finger inside, then two, watching Suo Wei’s face.
Wu Suo Wei's lips part in a tiny gasp as his rim is penetrated. His mouth forms a small o as he feels himself getting stretched and prepared.
Chi Cheng worked him open slowly, taking his time.
Little Jealousy, still coiled around Suo Wei’s thigh, shifted again, his sleek body gliding slightly higher, the little snake slithered up further, wrapping himself lightly around Suo Wei’s neck with a gentle pressure.
“Chi Cheng…”Wu Suo Wei moans as he bucks his hips slightly at the sensation of being choked.
“Easy there,” Chi Cheng murmured, a faint smirk tugging at his lips as he glanced at the snake.
Chi Cheng then pressed forward, the tip of his cock nudging against Suo Wei, ready from the lube. The first push was slow and he felt the tight heat of Suo Wei start to give way, enveloping him inch by inch. A low groan slipped from his throat as he sank into Suo Wei, it was so fucking perfect it made his head spin.
“Ah!” Wu Suo Wei gasps. He grips at the sheet as he feels every inch of Chi Cheng’s cock slide in him and fill him up.
“Fuck, Weiwei,” His hands tightened on Suo Wei’s hips, fingers digging into his skin as he pushed further, feeling the way Suo Wei stretched around him, the way his body yielded just enough to take him in.
“Baobei…” Wu Suo Wei pants. Tears of pleasure slide down the corner of his eyes.
Chi Cheng paused when he was fully seated, his hips flush against Suo Wei, just letting himself feel it, the way Suo Wei surrounded him, the way his inner walls fluttered and squeezed, adjusting to his size.
“You can move now..” Wu Suo Wei moans.
The snake’s tiny head tilted slightly, tongue flicking out and Chi Cheng couldn’t help the faint huff of a laugh that escaped him. Even now, Little Jealousy was watching.
He started to move, pulling out just a little before sliding back in, setting a slow rhythm. Each thrust felt like diving into heaven and hell all at once. His cock throbbed inside Suo Wei, the sensation of his walls gripping him so intense. He could feel every ridge, every subtle shift inside Suo Wei.
“Oh my god!” Wu Suo Wei exclaims as his body lights up from the slow drag of Chi Cheng's cock. He unconsciously squeezes down on his boyfriend's cock when he thinks he is pulling too far out.
“Goddamn, you feel so good,” Chi Cheng muttered, the words slipping out before he could stop them. His hands slid up from Suo Wei’s hips to his sides, thumbs brushing over the curve of his ribs as he rocked into Suo Wei, each thrust a little harder, a little deeper, chasing that perfect friction.
“My Chi Cheng.” Wu Suo Wei says possessively as the thrusts into his body get a little harder.
“My baobei.” He whimpers as he throws his arms around Chi Cheng's neck bringing himself and Little Jealousy closer to Chi Cheng as he bends his back off the bed.
“My boyfriend.” He pants over the shell of Chi Cheng's ear as his legs shake, and his body tremors with his nearing orgasm.
“My laogong….my laogong…!” He moans as Little Jealousy slithers down his body when Chi Cheng yanks Suowei's leg forward and wraps it around his waist.
Suowei orgasms untouched by that gesture, he moans the word laogong and his cum coats his and Chi Cheng's chests as they continue to move together.
“Weiwei,” Chi Cheng gasped, his voice barely recognizable as he felt himself teetering on the edge. The heat of Suo Wei, the way he felt around him, it was too much, too fucking good. He thrust harder, deeper, losing himself in the feel of Suo Wei’s body, in the way he took him in, every inch of him gripping him like he never wanted to let go. And as he felt that final wave of pleasure start to crash over him, he knew he’d never be anywhere else but here, with Suo Wei, feeling him like this.
All the things that had come before Suowei, every lover, every brief entanglement, every fumbling attempt to find comfort in bodies that weren't his, they collapsed into irrelevance here. It was laughable now, how he’d once convinced himself that he could be satisfied by anything less than this.
Nothing before had ever felt. Not like Suowei.
Chi Cheng had chased clarity for years and found only noise.
But he was here now. Suowei was here. And Chi Cheng wasn’t looking anywhere else anymore. He didn’t want to. Not for a second. Not even in memory.
He belonged to him.
There was no version of the future anymore that didn’t have Suowei in it. No one else had a shape that could even remind him of what this felt like.
There would be no substitutions.
No one after.