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NEW VILLAIN BOOSTER GOLD BOOSTS GOLD
It was chaos yesterday at National Bank in Chicago, IL when it was discovered that nearly 50 of their safety deposit boxes had been looted. The culprit was no mystery, as he was caught on tape as well as he'd painted his pseudonym—Booster Gold—on the wall of lockers. The mystery, however, was how Booster Gold got into the locked building and through the extensive security measures without tripping any alarms. He managed to get in and out of the vault--with an estimated $20,000 worth of loot--in less than thirty minutes, and even had enough time left over to wave and smile to the camera. And what's more, despite the video camera evidence, police were unable to recover any fingerprints—or anything at all—to point them towards the real identity of the so-called "Booster Gold, Incredible Thief".
~
"Mr. Kord? Mr. Kord, are you all right?"
Ted started from where he'd been standing statue-still in front of the door to his office, staring down at the newspaper in his hand. He looked over at the person speaking—his assistant, Carly—and shook himself from his reverie.
"Yes, yes, just—" he gestured to the paper, "—reading about this thief."
"Oh, you mean Booster Gold?" Carly said, lighting up unexpectedly. Ted frowned at her.
"Yes," he said warily, unsure if he wanted to know what had his assistant so excited.
"He is so handsome!" she gushed, and sure enough, Ted didn't want to know, "And amazing! He's been caught on camera every single time he's robbed something, but the police have no idea who he is! Isn't that amazing?" Ted continued to frown, but only partly at his secretary's moral ambiguity, mostly he was annoyed at himself.
"Yeah. Amazing," Ted said, looking back down at the paper, which had a blown-up security camera picture of Booster Gold's winning smile right there on the front page.
Alone in his office, Ted ignored the pressing Kord Industries work he had to do in favor of typing a super-secret password into his computer and pulling up a link to the computer down below the basement— the Blue Beetle's computer. It had been three months since this super-thief had shown up in Ted's city, and for three months Ted had been trying and failing to track him down.
Every crime was the same; no alarms were tripped, no forced entry, not a single fingerprint or hair left behind, and always a ton of security camera footage of a blonde man hamming it up for the camera. There were also the parts that weren't in the newspapers— how there was footage of the thief flying, and occasionally he had some kind of hovering device with him as well. He was obviously an attention seeker, and usually those were the easiest villains to catch, but this one was exceptionally good at covering his tracks, or not leaving any tracks to find.
Ted was starting to get annoyed, and not only because Booster Gold had managed to escape with over $100,000 in three months. He was starting to make the Blue Beetle look bad, like he couldn't catch some two-bit showboating thief. Which he totally could, he'd just been busy with Kord Industries lately, and well, he didn't really have any leads.
If only he knew what Booster Gold's next mark was.
That's when it hit him.
~
"Skeets, look! Another newspaper article with my beautiful face on it!" Booster joyfully waved the newspaper at the robot floating nearby.
"Do I have to, sir? I have seen the other fifteen—"
"But this one's different! Look they're comparing me to Penguin! Penguin! Isn't that great?"
"Incredible, sir."
"Man, I should have done this years ago. I'll never have to get a stupid security guard job again!"
"Technically, sir, you did start—"
"Shut up, Skeets," Booster scowled at his robot companion and then looked back at the newspaper, flipping it over and glancing at the stories that weren't as important as he was, "Hey, look at this!"
"Please do not make me look at another picture of your face."
"No, no, not that. This!" He pointed to the article at the bottom of the front page, "This company has some kind of new computer thing that's going to be huge! Look, it even says here, that the prototype is under extra security to prevent anyone from stealing it and selling it to a rival company! I bet I could steal it!"
"There's no point in trying to talk you out of this, is there?"
"Has it worked the last five times?"
"No."
"Then no. Come on, let's get suited up."
~
It seemed almost too easy breaking into the Kord Industries building; Booster didn't run into a single security guard and Skeets had the alarms disabled and the computer system feeding them all the information they needed in seconds. Booster just figured that he was getting better at this stealing thing and didn't worry about it, despite Skeets' incessant whining.
"Come on, Skeets, it's not that big of a deal. They probably just published all that stuff about extra security to, you know, make people think this computer thing is more important than it is. Marketing, you know? It's probably a piece of junk," Booster reasoned, casually strolling through a large, open room that had been labeled 'Research Dept.' on the map Skeets found in the computer. Somewhere something made a sound like an angry chipmunk and Booster glanced around briefly before shrugging and moving on.
"Look, there it is!" Booster said, moving over to a desk with a thin, flat screen sitting exactly in the middle.
"Sir, I don't—" Skeets started to warn, but then made a small electrical sound and fell to the ground with a thunk.
"Skeets!" Booster cried, tucking the computer under his arm and falling to his knees next to Skeets, gingerly picking him up. He turned the little robot over in his hands, looking for and failing to find any signs of life.
"Freeze, Buster!" yelled a voice, effectively stalling Booster's inspection of Skeets. He looked up to see a man decked out in a blue spandex suit and yellow goggles, with some kind of bug design on his chest.
"It's Booster," Booster corrected idly, flashing the man a grin. The man faltered and frowned.
"What?"
"My name is Booster Gold, not Buster," Booster rolled his eyes and stood up, Skeets in one hand and the pilfered computer in the other. The man stared at him for a long moment until Booster broke eye contact to glance down at Skeets.
"What did you do to him?" Booster demanded more than asked, brandishing the darkened Skeets at the blue man, whose expression shifted from confused to smug.
"Electromagnetic pulse," he explained, flashing Booster a smile that was actually pretty nice, for someone who was pointing a gun at him, "Disables anything electric in the area." Booster glanced down at Skeets again, and then at his own hand, wondering if his force field and flight ring counted as "electric".
"Drop the computer. And the little... yellow... thing," the blue bug-thing guy prompted, gesturing to Booster with his gun.
"Uh..." Booster said, casting around for something to say while he thought of how to escape. Thankfully, this guy didn't seem too trigger-happy, or else he'd have shot first and not stopped to discuss EMPs, "No?" The man blanched at the obviously unexpected answer and Booster wondered who this guy was. Obviously he was some kind of hero, but Booster didn't recognize his getup. He wondered if there was a polite way to ask who was trying to arrest you.
"Excuse me?" the man said, obviously bewildered, which gave Booster a brilliant idea.
"I'm not gonna drop them," Booster said, flashing the man his most charming and attractive smile and taking a cautious step forward, "Who are you anyways?" The confused look on the man's face fell into something more like disappointment.
"You don't know who I am?" he asked, sounding more resigned and sad than angry. Booster shrugged and the man sighed and ran the hand holding his gun over his head like he meant to run it through his hair.
"I'm the Blue Beetle," he said, and still Booster had no idea who he was, "And you're not going anywhere!" The Blue Beetle seemed to remember that he was supposed to apprehending a thief and pointed the gun at Booster again. Booster raised his hands, which were still full of technology, trying to look as innocent and non-threatening as possible and taking another step forward. He just needed to stall long enough for Skeets to reboot, so they could get the hell out of there.
“Why would I want to go anywhere?” Booster asked, continuing to inch forward and give the Blue Beetle what he hoped was a friendly, alluring look. The Beetle shifted slightly, going back to looking confused.
“Aren’t you trying to steal that computer?” The Blue Beetle said, nodding to the computer in Booster’s hand. Booster looked down at it and then back up at The Beetle, shrugging again. The other man gave Booster a look like he couldn’t decide whether to laugh or smack him upside the head.
“Well, I was, yeah,” Booster looked down at the computer again, and then in a moment of inspiration tossed the computer onto a nearby desk, “That was before you showed up.” Booster regretted the words as soon as they were out of his mouth, all too aware that he was in over his head, but he gave The Blue Beetle a sly, flirtatious look anyway. The Beetle looked startled, his eyes wide behind his goofy goggles and Booster couldn’t help but feel a swell of pride when he fumbled his gun and nearly dropped it.
“Excuse me?” The Beetle said, taking a step back when he finally realized how close Booster had snuck while they were conversing.
“Well I just,” Booster paused, and out of the corner of his eye he saw a blink of red light, “Think… That you’re much more interesting. Than computers.” Booster felt himself floundering but knew he was past the point of no return, and in the spirit of that thought he lunged forward and grabbed The Blue Beetle by the face and pulled him into a kiss. The kiss didn’t last for more than a few seconds, and met its untimely end when the Beetle’s elbow met Booster’s jaw, but the desired effect was reached. Booster ran as fast as he could away from Beetle, bolting for the door, leaving Beetle sputtering and stumbling behind him.
“Let’s get out of here, Skeets!” Booster called to the robot flying along behind him, now completely rebooted and back to his usual self. From behind him Booster gathered that The Blue Beetle had regained his composure by the bellow of rage, and couldn’t help but laugh.
“I’m on it, Sir,” Skeets said, zooming ahead to interface with the Kord Industries computers and resetting any alarms between Booster and the exit.
Booster was pleased to learn that his force field was online when a zap of energy bounces off it and goes zinging away.
“Get back here!” The Blue Beetle yelled, something in his tone making Booster want to laugh as hard as he could.
“Catch me if you can!” Booster called over his shoulder, laughing at the answering battle-cry. Another blast ricocheted into the ceiling as Booster skidded through the door, finding Skeets at the end of a hallway.
“I thought it best to go for the quickest escape, seeing as you have failed,” Skeets said, and Booster didn’t have time to scowl at the robot as he launched himself out of the window Skeets had opened. Booster streaked off into the sky, only turning back once to wave at the very angry, blue shape hanging out of the window.
~
The next day Booster wasn’t on the front page of the newspaper. Instead, there’s a filler article on page five about The Blue Beetle foiling Booster Gold’s attempt at flattery. Booster pointedly did not clip the article, though he did inspect the photograph attached to the article. Booster has learned that The Blue Beetle was a somewhat unremarkable, c-list hero, and Booster wasn’t surprised that he’d managed to escape unscathed.
Still, though, he kept thinking about him, wondering who The Blue Beetle really was, who he was when he wasn’t pointing a ray gun at thieves. It was a strange feeling for Booster, to wonder about someone he hadn’t actually met. Although they had kissed, which was something. He was the first person Booster had kissed in the twenty-first century. That was probably what it was.
After the run-in with Beetle, Booster took more care planning his heists, not because he was particularly worried about getting caught, just that he looked so much more impressive when he didn’t have to make a daring escape. Without really trying Booster started stealing more high-profile things and getting more attention. That was how he met the Madmen.
It turned out Booster Gold wasn’t the only thievery-based supervillain in area, which Booster hadn’t known until the Madmen found him. Their leader had seemed convinced that Booster would be a vital member of their gang. Booster hadn’t exactly been thrilled at the prospect, but it did promise more success and bigger jobs. They also seemed to have a strange obsession with The Blue Beetle, seeing as he had defeated them nearly every time they attempted a robbery. Booster couldn’t really blame them, though he didn’t really have any problem with the Beetle himself. He seemed like a good guy, for a hero, and he had given Booster a good laugh. Apparently a big part of the new plan involving Booster was making The Blue Beetle look like a fool, and it wasn’t like they had said anything about killing the guy, so Booster was on board.
When you didn’t have a Skeets to plan everything for you, planning a heist took a long time. It was also really, really boring. And the Madmen were actually pretty weird. Booster spent the long planning meetings mostly dozing off and not listening. His part in the whole thing was simple and easy to remember, so it wasn’t like he really needed to know the other parts. All he had to do was distract and bait The Blue Beetle and then fly off with the goods in tow.
They had purposely told The Blue Beetle that something evil was going down on the docks, while the actual heist was going off several blocks away. Booster was waiting for him to show, to lead him on a wild goose chase that would end in the Beetle’s capture.
Booster waited for the blue airship to show up and then jumped down onto the docks, pretending to steal from a large crate until the Beetle rounded the corner.
“You!” Beetle growled, drawing his ray gun when Booster dropped the box he was holding.
“Funny meeting you here,” Booster said with a grin, zipping up into the air just as The Blue Beetle fired off a blast. He’d let the Madmen borrow his force field, after much cajoling and an increase in Booster’s cut of the loot, so he had to be extra careful to not get hit by The Beetle’s gun. He had his flight ring though, so he still figured it would be a piece of cake.
“You missed!” Booster teased, sticking his tongue out at Beetle from twenty feet up and then almost getting a blast in the face.
“If you stopped moving I wouldn’t miss!” Beetle yelled back, scaling the crate in order to get a clearer shot. Booster zipped up and around, dodging blasts from the ray gun but not getting too far ahead from Beetle. He was trying to lead Beetle in the right direction without obviously leading Beetle, and it took a bit of fancy flightwork.
“Hey, Booster!” Beetle called suddenly and Booster turned back, just in time to fly headfirst into a billboard. Beetle’s laugh was loud and uproarious; Booster thought that if he wasn’t trying to dislodge his head from the billboard he would have laughed along with him.
~
Ted realized he was having far too much fun chasing this Booster Gold around than he probably should while attempting to apprehend a suspect, but he figured having fun while hero-ing wasn’t the worst thing he could do. And it wasn’t like he wasn’t trying to catch Booster Gold, but who said he couldn’t have a good time while he did it?
He chased Booster for a few blocks, until he ducked into an old warehouse and Ted signaled the Bug to move closer to his position before following.
The warehouse was deadly quiet: no sign of Booster Gold’s showboating anywhere. He raised his gun and moved along quietly, skirting around the edge of the room and keeping an eye out for any danger.
“Hey Beetle!” Booster Gold’s voice rang out and Ted turned toward it, running around a large stack of crates. He caught a flash of gold out of the corner of his eye and ran towards it, sneaking into a room off to the side of the warehouse. As soon as he’d entered the room the door slammed shut behind him, and Ted realized too late that he’d been led right into a trap. He tried the handle but of course it was locked, so he turned to face the room he’d been locked into. It was longish and nondescript, with Booster Gold standing at the far end.
Ted shot at him but Booster dodged easily; he’d probably been expecting the attack.
“You tricked me!” Ted said, rushing across the room to the man hovering a couple of feet above the floor. His pride was wounded by how easily he’d been trapped, how easily he’d blindly followed Booster.
“Did you miss the part where I’m a supervillian?” Booster said with a grin, which Ted was happy to punch right off his face. Booster Gold grunted and stumbled, looking more surprised than anything else that Ted had clocked him one.
“Supervillain? Please. If you’re anything you’re a super-pain-in-my-ass,” Ted said, ducking away from Booster’s answering blow.
“Sorry about this,” Booster said, and Ted whipped around to see Booster swinging a two-by-four just before everything went black.
~
Ted drifted back into consciousness some minutes later, barely aware of anything except the voices.
“What are you going to do with that?” That voice seemed vaguely familiar.
“What do you think I’m going to do with it? Dance a jig?” Ted was becoming more and more conscious by the second, and he realized he was tied to a chair. He figured feigning unconsciousness was his best bet on getting the upper hand. There was a brief pause in the conversation and then a laugh.
“I’m going to kill him with it!” Ted did his best to suppress a twitch at those words. He was pretty sure he knew who they were referring to.
“Kill him?” The other voice sounded slightly panicked, and Ted realized who it was: Booster Gold, “You’re going to kill him? That wasn’t part of the plan!”
“That’s the whole point of the plan! Why do you think you led him here and knocked him out? So that we could just let him go?” Ted wasn’t sure who the other voice was, but it sounded familiar.
“No—I didn’t—I don’t—” Booster sputtered, and Ted paused in planning his escape to wonder why Booster Gold, notorious superthief, seemed so upset by The Blue Beetle’s death.
“What’s your problem? You agreed to all of this weeks ago! Does Booster Gold have a little crush?” There was cruel laughter and Booster sputtering some more, and Ted nearly twitched again as he remembered what Booster was surely remembering as well: the kiss he’d stolen a few months ago.
“No! I just—I don’t think we should kill him!” Ted wondered if he should be worried or touched about how worked up Booster sounded, but found he was more interested in loosening the knots around his wrists.
“Why not? You think he wouldn’t do the same to you? Without him in the picture, we can do whatever we want!”
“But—”
“I didn’t realize you were so soft. It doesn’t matter! I’m killing him!”
“No!” Ted’s eyes snapped open just as the other voice—which he now recognized as the leader of the Madmen—lunged at him with a knife, and Ted whipped his now-unbound arm out from behind his back and elbowed his attacker in the neck. He sent the Madman reeling into Booster, who was a few steps away. Booster grunted and grappled with him briefly while Ted focused on untying the ropes around his ankles. When Ted stood both Booster Gold and the Madman were on the floor, though the Madman was out cold and Booster was groaning. Ted was about to run out the door, but hesitated, looking back at the blonde man groaning on the floor. He sighed and turned back.
“Hey, are you all right?” Ted asked, leaning over Booster and putting his hand on his shoulder. Booster rolled onto his back, his upper thigh covered in blood and a knife in his hand.
“Fine,” Booster choked, struggling to stand up and gasping when he put weight on his injured leg.
“Come on, we’ve got to get out of here.” Ted said, helping Booster hobble toward the door, until Booster stopped him and pushed him away.
“We?” Booster said, giving Ted a strange look, “How is there a ‘we’ here? Aren’t you supposed to arrest me?” Ted shrugged and smiled a little.
“You didn’t want to kill me, and got stabbed on my behalf. That puts you pretty low on my shit list,” Ted said, smiling wider when Booster glanced away and looked embarrassed, “Besides, it seems like neither of us will get out of here without the other’s help. Let’s go.” Booster looked like he was going to argue some more, but then seemed to realize that Ted had a point and shook his head.
“All right, fine,” Booster said, allowing Ted to put an arm around his shoulders, “Wait, here.” Booster reached behind his back and pulled out Ted’s ray gun, handing it over.
“Thanks,” Ted said, pocketing the gun and then helping Booster take a few wobbly steps.
“Fuck, ow,” Booster said, stopping to press a hand into his thigh.
“Can’t you fly?” Ted pointed out, and Booster looked up at him in surprise.
“Oh yeah. I forgot,” Booster said, hovering above the ground and sighing happily when it took the pressure off his leg.
“Ready to go?” Ted said, sending Booster a grin.
“Ready,” Booster said with an answering grin. Then they threw the door open.
With Booster at his side getting through the rest of the Madmen was like child’s play. It was strange how easily they worked together, considering they’d been enemies until very recently. Ted also learned some interesting facts about Booster Gold—that he had some kind of highly advanced force-field and the small yellow object he’d been seen with was actually a genuine robot with artificial intelligence.
Ted was dying to ask about it, especially because Booster Gold didn’t exactly seem like some kind of genius inventor, but he never got the chance. He wasn’t sure he ever would have a chance, especially when Booster flew him to the Bug and then moved to take off again.
“Wait!” Ted said without really thinking it through, and Booster stopped and turned back towards him.
“What?”
“I just… Wanted to thank you. For saving me. You’re not really all that villainous, for a supervillian,” Ted said and Booster made a face.
“Just because I didn’t want to kill someone! I’m still really supervillainous!” Booster protested, crossing his hands over his chest. Ted raised an eyebrow at him.
“Suit yourself. Still, though, you should think about switching sides. I think you’d make a good hero.” Booster made another discontented face.
“But there’s so much less money in hero-ing,” Booster said, shaking his head. Ted considered this.
“You know… You do have a point there. Maybe I’ll switch to your side.” Ted grinned and Booster grinned back, and for a long moment they just smiled at each other before bursting into laughter.