Chapter Text
It’s been just over a month since Shadow sacrificed himself for the sake of the world, and Sonic can’t stop thinking about him.
It's odd. Sonic barely even knew the guy, and essentially all of the brief time they spent together involved exchanging blows and chasing one another. Shadow almost killed Tom and wiped out the entire planet, for crying out loud! He really, truly, shouldn't care this much...
... But he does. And oh, it consumes him.
He can’t enjoy lighthearted moments with his family without feeling a pang of remorse for Shadow, who had a life like this torn away from him. It just isn’t fair. Yes, Shadow made mistakes, but he was driven entirely by pain and grief. And when it had mattered the most, he took Sonic's outstretched hand and made the right choice.
Every movie night, every camping trip, every game of baseball— It makes Sonic wonder if they were things Shadow might've enjoyed. Did he and Maria play games like him and Tails? Did they tease each other and playfully bicker like him and Knuckles? What was Shadow's favourite flavour of ice-cream? Would he have enjoyed getting to properly explore Earth? All these questions that he knows he'll never get the answers to. And that hurts more than he could've ever anticipated.
His family have noticed, because of course they have. It’s hard not to notice when someone as hyperactive and chatty as Sonic becomes quieter and more withdrawn; a muted version of himself. But he brushes off their concern and pretends he doesn’t notice the slightly-longer-than-usual hugs from Maddie, or the gentle questioning from Tom, or the way his brothers look at him with a troubled mixture of worry and understanding.
He wishes they didn't feel the need to subtly fuss over him. He wishes they’d believe him when he says he's fine, totally fine, completely fine! Even though the truth is, he isn't. This persistence ache in his heart won't go away. The pain of loss never completely fades; Sonic knows that all too well. It’s something he’ll carry with him forever.
Whenever he lifts his gaze to the starry night sky, his mind is filled with memories of the moment they shared on the moon. The moment where he got to see a vulnerable, real side of Shadow, and realized that they had so much more in common than just looking alike. What other similarities did they share? The light shines, even though the star is gone… Shadow’s softly spoken words haunt him, especially on nights like these, where he abandons fruitless attempts to fall asleep in favour of climbing out onto the roof.
“Are you up there, Shadow?”
The stars, of course, don’t respond. Sonic sighs before reaching a hand into his quills. From within, he procures a picture frame. The glass is broken and the photo has faded with age, but Shadow and Maria's smiles are still pure and warm; the love shared between them clear as day.
At the time, he wasn’t really sure why he decided to hold onto this photo frame. All he knew was that this picture, this girl, seemed important. It was one of the initial signs that there was far more to Shadow than what met the eye. He had a family, just like Sonic. And, considering that the military base and everything within it ended up sucked into that actually-pretty-scary black hole… He's glad he made the choice to slip it into his quills for safekeeping. In an ideal world, he might've had a chance to return it to its rightful owner.
Some nights, it's enough to simply come up here and watch the stars until he feels calm enough to go back to bed. But other times, Sonic finds himself far too restless. It's nights like these where sitting alone with only his thoughts for company is especially undesirable. Tonight, he'll go for a run, Sonic decides as he tucks the photo back into his quills and rises to his feet— Quietly, because Knuckles is a light sleeper, and the last thing he wants is to be mistaken for an intruder. It's happened before.
The wind whistles in Sonic's ears as he leaps down from the roof and takes off into a sprint. He runs aimlessly, with no real goal or destination in mind. It's just him, the sound of his feet hitting the ground, and the blur of the forest that surrounds him.
Sonic twists and turns and jumps, losing himself in the familiar rhythm. As long as he's careful to not cause yet another power outage, he's free to not hold back. And that would provide for a well-needed distraction from his depressing thoughts, it weren't for the fact that he still finds himself haunted by a certain black and red hedgehog, who's apparently living in his head rent-free.
He didn't really have a chance to reflect on it at the time, given how high the stakes were, but Sonic can admit that there was something exciting about meeting somebody who could keep up with him. Tails and Knuckles are fast and capable, absolutely, but Shadow? He was on a whole other level. The pair of them had been evenly matched and it was thrilling. Sonic still recalls the way it felt to fight alongside him in space, the sheer exhilaration and energy that had coursed through his blood... If only things had turned out differently, maybe Shadow could be racing alongside him right now.
Maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe if Sonic had been stronger, he could've held on for longer and done something, anything, to change Shadow's fate. But now he's gone and there's nothing he can do about it.
With a frustrated shout that startles a few birds into flying away, Sonic finally comes to a stop, cursing his own stupid mind. He was foolish to believe he could actually outrun his thoughts anyways. He doesn't even know why he's ended up so irrevocably attached to Shadow, but he's certain it's going to drive him crazy.
Sonic takes in a deep breath and scans his surroundings. With the fractured moon as his only source of light it takes him a moment to realise that there's something familiar about where he's ended up; it’s as if, subconsciously, he knew that this was where he needed to go.
To anybody else, this would simply look like any other path of the forest. Nothing out of the ordinary. But for Sonic, this is close to a place he used to call home. Because before home was a cozy house with a loving family, it was merely a lonely little cave for one lonely little hedgehog.
It doesn't take long for Sonic to find the cave’s entrance. He jumps down, landing on his feet with ease. The cave is exactly how he remembers leaving it when he'd last visited. That had been one of the very last peaceful moments before everything turned upside down. He takes a moment to bask in bittersweet nostalgia, before gravitating towards the mural he drew all those years ago.
He pushes aside the leaves and branches, just like Tom had done, and exhales softly as he finds himself once again staring at the chalk illustration of his younger self next to his first mother figure. Losing Shadow was different to losing Longclaw, of course, but the sharp, overwhelming sting of grief is a familiar feeling.
He presses a gloved hand to the cave wall, closing his eyes for a quiet moment to pay respect to Longclaw. Sonic's found himself a new family, and he knows that the owl would be happy for him, but he still cares for her. He always will.
When Sonic opens his eyes, an idea has come to mind. He’s quick to dart around, tossing aside comic books and ping pong balls and other various trinkets until he finally finds what he's looking for, shoved under a stash of pencils and paper: a box of colourful chalk.
He returns to the mural and, once again, the picture frame is removed from his quills. Using it, and his own memories as a reference, he sticks his tongue out in concentration and sets to work. Swoopy black quills, red highlights… Gold bracelets, white gloves, cool-looking shoes… Striking ruby eyes and the final touch; a gentle smile that Sonic hasn't been able to get out of his head ever since he watched the sunrise illuminate him.
Sonic takes a step back to survey the result. It looks pretty good, if he does say so himself. Although, it's still missing something… With the same chalk he used to colour Shadow's inhibitors, Sonic surrounds the illustrated hedgehog with several stars, then carefully props the photo frame down on the ground beneath.
There. It's perfect.
★★★
Over the next week or so, Sonic finds himself visiting the cave on multiple occasions. Sometimes he brings things with him, like a handful of flowers from the garden, or some of Maddie’s scented candles that he hopes she won't miss. Each item is arranged underneath the drawing of Shadow, next to the picture frame.
Sonic is aware that he might be the only one left who actually cares to remember Shadow, which is… A depressing thought. But he's decided to shoulder the responsibility of honouring his former enemy's memory, even if he's still grappling with complicated feelings.
Doing this turns out to be a lot more healing than he expected. It gives him something to do with his grief, and a place he can escape to when needed. A healthy coping mechanism is what he imagines Tails would call it, if he actually knew what Sonic was doing every time he went out for a run.
He knows that it wouldn't cause any harm to tell his family. Maybe. Probably? Okay, yeah, he's actually not entirely sure. But, either way; something about this feels too personal to share. Perhaps in the future, when the pain becomes easier to bear, he'll be able to. But for now? This is Sonic's thing.
… So when he enters the cave today and immediately notices that somebody else has been here? Well. It alarms him, to say the least.
The first thing that alerts Sonic to the existence of an intruder is the fact that the blankets have been moved. While previously they were scattered across the cave in various locations, they've now all been gathered and arranged into what Sonic can only describe as a nest in the far corner. Brows furrowed in confusion as he wonders who or what has been here, Sonic starts to approach the collection of fabric, only to swiftly be distracted by something far more intriguing.
From the corner of his eye, yellow and blue catch his attention. A new addition to his mural. Sonic dashes over immediately, heart hammering in his chest. Next to the drawing he etched of Shadow, there's now a young girl with blonde hair and a friendly grin. The lines of colour are sharp and it's obvious that whoever drew this isn't exactly an experienced artist— But that doesn't matter, because the sheer amount of love that has been poured into the artwork is abundantly evident. It reminds Sonic of, well…
That photo, the one of Shadow and Maria. Sonic looks down, eyes widening as he realises it’s missing. The flowers and candles remain untouched, but someone’s taken the picture. His mind races. Could this mean–? No, surely not. There’s no way. That can’t be possible. But, who else would…?
Suddenly, a crackle of energy from behind him snaps Sonic out of his thoughts. He immediately whips around, arms raised in a defensive position— Only to end letting them fall as he gasps.
Because there, standing just a few feet away from him; wide-eyed like a deer caught in the headlights and looking noticeably worse for wear, but alive— Miraculously, impossibly, wonderfully alive, is—
“Shadow?!”