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“Let— let her go,” B2EMO said, chirping wildly after bumping into Cassian’s leg.
”Let who go Bee?”
The droid fell silent. This was a first. Cassian had finally made it to Gangi Moon after promising to come for them. He’d located Wilmon, Jezzi and Bee in one safehouse, and Bix and Brasso held rooms in another, though he hadn’t seen them yet. Cassian looked around the dimly lit quarters at Wilmon, who looked away from him and down into his stew. Cassian then looked at Jezzi, who wiped her hands clean on a worn rag.
“You need to see Bix before you go.”
”I’ve been trying to but she’s never at her new place. Something about running supplies, the landlord said. What is she involved in, Jezzi? I told all of you to stay low until I could come back for you.”
Jezzi didn’t answer him but picked up her own bowl of stew and shared a long look with Wilmon.
”Best you go try her now,” the young lad said, though he looked much older than his years.
”I’ll be back for you,” Cassian said to them. They merely nodded, still looking into their stew.
“You always say— say that,” B2EMO said sadly.
”And you always come through.” Cassian patted the droid’s head, and the droid fell silent once more.
Cassian walked briskly through the building Bix was staying at and did a silly knock on her door, the way he did when they were younger. He was eager to see her, hoping she had healed from her ordeal, wanting to help her, longing for something more…
But it was Brasso who opened her door. “Oh…I see,” said Cassian, seeing Bix sleeping in the bed behind the bigger man. It was a shock, but it shouldn’t have surprised him.
“I didn’t want you to find out this way, Cass,” Brasso said. “You have to understand what it was like for her,” he continued, not without compassion. Cassian could see that, could feel it radiating off of Brasso. “I was here to pick up the pieces.”
“I know,” Cassian said, feeling a mixture of regret, sadness, and sheepishness.
Brasso motioned Cassian to follow him outside, so as not to disturb Bix’s slumber. ”Pegla’s managed to contact us, even though it’s dangerous for him to do so. It won’t surprise you The Empire significantly increased their presence on Ferrix. They brought in prisoners to build more barracks, then brought in even more prisoners to fill them. They’ve replaced everyone with slave labour. Any hospitality, what’s left of it, is used in service of the officers stationed there. Even if we could go back—”
”I don’t want you further involved in any of this,” Cassian said, regretting that his choices had put them in so much danger. It was one thing for him to risk his life but this?
”We’re already involved,” Brasso responded.
“Involved how?” Cassian squared up to Brasso, even though it would be a lost fight.
”We’re running supplies to Coruscant.”
”Coruscant? That’s the seat of The Empire. You’re risking Bix like this?”
”It was her idea,” Brasso said, lifting his large palm up gently. He didn’t need to have, Cassian knew this to be true.
”We’ve opened a small repair shop on one of the lower levels. No one notices or pays us any attention. We can move about freely. And we’ve gotten to know some of the locals who frequent some of the cheap establishments down there. I don’t have to tell you how vocal some of them lot get after a drink or three. We’ve been able to pass along information. Maybe some of it’s good intel, maybe not. But it’s something, Cass.”
Cassian felt himself nodding before he could stop himself.
”We’ll be alright,” the bigger man stepped forward and locked eyes with his. “She’ll be alright. I know how you’ve always felt about her. It was never my intention to get involved. But she knows her own mind, Cass. You and I have always known that.”
”I can see what she sees in you,” Cassian said, gulping and exhaling air he didn’t know he had been holding.
Brasso chuckled. “And I can see what she saw in you. Hell, there might have been a time or two when I saw it myself.” He stared at Cassian, as though daring him to say something back. Cassian didn’t reply. “Before The Empire took control of Ferrix, I reckon half of the younger lads who worked the shipyard would have gone off with you, if you were so inclined.”
Cassian chuckled at that. “Trust me,” he said, reaching out and clapping Brasso on the shoulder. “If I were so inclined, I’d pick you. Who else better to keep me out of trouble?” And Cassian realised this was true. He wasn’t sure of the exact nature of his feelings towards Brasso, but they went beyond friendship. But no time to mourn what could have been. Brasso and Bix had each other now, and that was exactly how it should be. He would not endanger either one of them any further than he already had.
*
Cassian couldn’t help himself though, he had to see Bix, if only for the last time. He slept on his ship and came back in the morning. He reckoned if Brasso answered the door the bigger man would understand. But it was Bix who answered the door and this time Cassian could see Brasso now sleeping behind her, snoring.
“You shouldn’t be here,” Bix said, with a hint of sadness.
“It always comes back to that.”
She looked up wearily at him.
“I know I have no right to ask—”
“No you don’t,” she replied.
“I just—” The words wouldn’t come. Everything he put her through. He wanted to believe he was a different man now, and maybe he was, now devoted to a cause he initially wanted nothing to do with. But he still wouldn’t suit her any better than he did before.
“Does he make you happy?”
”Yes,” she replied, looking him straight in the eyes.
”I’m glad for that,” he said. It made it easier in a small way, knowing Brasso was a better match for her. “I’ll leave you then. You won’t have to worry about me.”
She smiled at that. “I know.”
He leaned in and gave her a small hug, which she returned. It wasn’t much but it was something. He took one last look at her and walked towards his ship.
In the end, it was better to let her go.