Chapter Text
This is the worst day ever.
With force Denki throws himself on his bed, already crying. He had a free day so he meant to get some stuff done and enjoy it but that didn't work out.
First he rotted in his bed, endlessly on his phone because he couldn't decide what to do first, then he had to hurry because the stores were about to close and he needed stuff for dinner, then he twisted his ankle while trying to get dressed, then he still had to go to the store just with a twisted ankle now, then they didn't have mushrooms so he needed to think of a new dinner on the spot, then he decided on burgers (one of the few highpoints of his day) and even remembered all the ingredients without a list (it took him ages to shop though), then he was finally on his way back, still limping and someone drove past him with a bike so close that Denki stumbled and dropped his bag and the burger patties and buns tumbled out and a car ran them over and sprayed Denki with dirty water from the side of the road.
Dirty and dripping, with scraped up knees and hands, without food, Denki managed to get home, to his flat, praying that Shinsou, his roommate, was still at work. But of course he was unlocking the door right at the moment that Denki showed up, looking like a limping, dirty, wet and unlovable mess.
He gaped at him and started saying his name but without a word Denki pushed past him, mortified, and fled into his room and fell on the bed.
And now the bed is dirty as well and he needs to change the covers and he doesn't have food and his crush saw him like that and everything is horrible.
A violent sob shakes him. Maybe he will just lay here. Maybe he can fall asleep like this. The wet clothes make him shiver. Maybe this is all a dream. The scratches on his hands burn.
Normally Denki can handle bad days just fine. He is good at focusing on the positives, good at finding them in the first place, good at distracting himself when he doesn't. But today there were just too many bad things on top of each other. He doesn't have the strength to get up.
Resigned to his fate to die alone and hungry and hated by the only man he loves he lets the tears flow freely, sobbing and whimpering. Or at least he plans to, but is interrupted by a tentative knock on his door.
He takes a deep breath and holds it, trying to be as silent as possible. He doesn't know why, he just wants to disappear.
“Denki?” It’s Shinsou, sounding worried and careful. “Is everything okay? Can I come in?”
Denki's eyes widen in panic. No! He is still dirty and now his face is puffy as well as red and he probably stinks from the water and -
“I'm gonna come in,” Shinsou says, sounding determined now and before Denki can protest, the door is opened. With a wet squeak Denki drops back onto his pillows, folding his arms over his head, hiding himself.
Soft footsteps come closer and he buries deeper. He can't handle this right now. The footsteps stop close to him, likely right next to his bed. It creaks when Shinsou puts his knee on it, leaning close.
“Denki?” His voice is as soft as his footsteps, not pressuring him but providing something to cling to. Denki sobs again. Shinsou calls him Denki and has offered his given name as well but Denki never uses it. It's too intimate for him, it makes the lines blur too much. Intimate is exactly what it sounds like when Shinsou says his name. His voice, rich and deep, sounds so beautiful when saying it and right now it's so caring that it tears another sob out of him.
“Hey.” Still soft, a hand lightly touches his shoulder. “What's going on, hm?”
Denki's shoulders shake as he tries to stay silent.
“It's okay, I'll just be here for a while, okay?” Shinsou has dropped his voice to a whisper and his hand is still on his shoulder providing reassuring warmth as Denki shakes with silent sobs.
He keeps talking, little reassurances and quiet murmurs. “You can talk to me, okay? Is there anything I can do? I can just stay here, you don't need to say anything. Are you okay? You're fine, I'm here.”
With time his hand and his words calm Denki. His need to cry dies down to a slow hiccup, replaced with bone deep exhaustion. His ankle hurts and his knees and hands as well. He sighs deeply, groaning a little and stilling when he hears Shinsou chuckle.
“Hey, you with me again? What happened?”
Denki feels himself flush. He is pathetic. Shinsou probably thinks that something horrible happened when Denki is really just a big crybaby.
Slowly he turns his head a little and risks a peek. Shinsou is already looking at him. His hair is messy as if he ran his hands through it a hundred times. He is wearing a simple shirt that climbs to his arms unfairly, his jacket folded in his lap. He didn't even get to come home properly. Denki feels guilty. He pushes himself up, wincing as his hands sting.
“I'm fine,” he presses out, “don't worry.” Awkwardly he tries to wipe away the tears and when he pulls his hand back it comes away dirty. He looks at it. God, he must look like a mess. Well, that was his chance with Shinsou. He feels his lip wobbling.
“Is that blood?!” The softness is gone from Shinsou's voice as he grabs Denki's hands and turns them over. With a frown he looks at the scrapes and bruises and then up at Denki.
“I fell,” he whispers in response to the unasked question.
“We need to clean those, give me a second.” Shinsou leaves the room but comes back a minute later with a first aid kit. He got rid of his jacket and instead wears a hoodie over his shirt now. Denki already misses his arms.
Shinsou sits down next to him on his bed and carefully takes his hands. “I'm gonna clean those, okay?”
Denki nods, throat too tight to say anything. He just watches as Shinsou takes some warm water and carefully cleans the dirt away, his touch as soft as possible, exposing raw skin.
“That's gonna itch and burn like a motherfucker while healing,” he frowns. “I need to disinfect it, that's gonna burn. I'm sorry, Denki.”
Denki just nods, lips pressed together. It does burn and a little whimper escapes him.
“I'm so sorry. Here, I have some salve.” Shinsou takes one of his hands into his own and rubs salve on the wounds with the free hand. His touch is gentle.
“Anywhere else?” he asks when he is done with both hands.
“My knees.” Denki looks down and sees that his jeans, his favorite jeans, are ripped at both knees. His lip is wobbling again. He just got this pair. Tears drop down from his face.
“Hey, no, Denki,” Shinsou strokes his cheek. “These are just jeans, you can get new ones. It isn't bad, okay?”
Denki sobs. How does this day keep getting worse?
“My ass looks great in those,” he cries while Shinsou keeps stroking his cheek.
“It does, Denki, you're right,” Shinsou nods, chuckling lightly. “What happened, hm?”
And Denki tells him, how he got nothing done and than had to rush and how the shopping went and how he fell and destroyed his new favorite pair of jeans and how he dirtied his sheets, “... and I think my other set is still in my laundry basket and how is this day so fucked up?”
Shinsou is just putting some salve on his knees, when he looks up.
“Sometimes days just suck. I'm sorry yours was so bad.” His eyes crinkle. “But maybe we can still turn it around? Have a nice evening?”
Denki blinks at him. Suddenly he realizes what just happened. “Oh god, I'm so sorry. I totally stole your evening and you just got home from work. I'm sorry I'm such a baby about this. You're right, some days just suck and I need to deal with it, I'm -”
“Hey, hey, hey. That's not what I was trying to say.”
“It isn't?”
“No,” Shinsou smiles. “I wanted you to know that it's okay. It's okay to feel down when so many things go wrong. But I still think we can maybe enjoy the last few hours, okay?”
Denki nods. “Why are you so nice to me?”
Shinsou purses his lips. “You're my roommate and friend, Denki. Of course I'm nice to you. Why would you think I wouldn't be?”
“It's not that I think you aren't nice, but… don't you have better things to do?”
Shinsou shakes his head. “No. Right now I'm gonna run you a bath so you can wash all this dirt off of you. That's what I have to do.”
His eyes are warm. He is a really nice friend.
“Thank you.” Denki smiles at him, a timid, tiny smile. Shinsou smiles back.
“You're welcome.” With that he leaves Denki's room and a moment later Denki can hear the water running in the bathroom.
He plays with the hem of his shirt while thinking. Shinsou is just perfect. The best friend, best roommate, best guy to fall in love with.
Well, maybe not the last bit. Denki scrunches up his nose. Maybe it would be better to love someone who loves him back. But Shinsou and him have only ever been friends. There was never anything romantic about them, as much as Denki wished for it.
Before he can think more about that though, Shinsou is back.
“I'm gonna carry you over, so you don't have to put pressure on your ankle, okay?”
“You- what?!” Denki stares at him. He doesn't know if he can survive being carried by Shinsou. Being in his arms.
“No discussion,” Shinsou is stern and scoops him up bridal style without much preamble. Denki squeaks. He isn't fat and obviously smaller than Shinsou but he has a decent amount of muscle and still weighs a lot. And Shinsou can just carry him like that?! As if he needed anything to make his crush worse. He wants to hide his blushing face but the only option would be to bury it in Shinsou's chest and he doubts that will make it better. So he just clings to his neck, letting soft purple strands caress the back of his hand.
With a few sure steps Denki is in the bathroom. Shinsou carefully lowers him onto the closed toilet. It smells like herbs and it's warm here. The bathtub is already partially filled and the water is slightly green from the herbal bath cream Denki bought ages ago when he thought he would take a bath more often. He stares at the ready placed towels next to the bathtub in wonder.
With big eyes he turns to Shinsou and finds him already looking at him. He is tapping his leg with a free hand and biting his lip.
“Is that- Do you need anything?”
Denki shakes his head.
“Can you-” He gestures from Denki to the bathtub and back. “Do you need help?”
Denki needs a second to understand, then he starts to get warm all over.
“No, no! I can- I will manage. Thank you.”
“Okay, I will… be outside. Shout if you need anything.”
Denki nods and Shinsou shuffles out. Once the door is closed Denki buries his head in his hands with a groan. This is so embarrassing, so pathetic. He squeezes his eyes shut.
“God, he's gonna think I'm a loser,” he mumbles before gathering himself and starting to undress.
It's not as easy as he thought. His shirt is still slightly clammy and starting to go stiff, his jeans are too tight to get off without a hassle and the wounds on his hands and knees don't make it any more pleasant. He huffs when he is finally naked and limps over to the bathtub. At least his ankle isn't swelling too much. Maybe it's just a light sprain.
He shuts off the water and carefully climbs inside. The scrapes burn and hurt but he grits his teeth together. He needs to get some more of this salve later. For now he sinks into the water, waiting for the sting to die down. It takes a few minutes for him to breathe more freely. But once he relaxes he realizes how nice this actually is. He is surrounded by warmth and nice smells and there is a bit of foam he can play around with. Shinsou really has the best ideas.
Shinsou.
Immediately his shoulders tense up. He doesn't even want to imagine what he thinks of him now. He needs to apologize to him.
With determination Denki grabs for his shampoo and shower gel. He will get clean and he will pull himself together and apologize and not be such a big crybaby about one bad day. But he will also enjoy the bath. Taking his time he shampoos and conditions his hair, dipping his head in periodically.
By the time he is done the water has started to cool. He pushes himself to stand, rinsing himself off quickly. His ankle still protests when he puts too much weight on it, so he wobbles a bit, but manages in the end. Carefully balancing he reaches for the towel, knocking over his shampoo bottle in the process. Before he can do anything it tips onto the bathroom floor, the cap flying off and shampoo spilling out. For a second Denki stills and just stares.
This might as well happen.
With a deep sigh he wraps his towel around his waist - just in time before the door is ripped open.
“What happened? I heard a crash and-” Shinsou stops in his tracks when he sees Denki and looks down at the bottle. Immediately his eyes flit back to Denki.
Denki blushes and grips the towel more tightly. He probably looks like a wet rat. At least he is clean now. He brushes his hand over his shoulder and torso to get rid of the water dripping from his hair.
“The worst day ever continues,” he mumbles.
“Your hair is longer,” Shinsou says at nearly the same time.
“Yeehaw, when it's wet…” Denki lifts his foot to climb out of the bathtub, swaying slightly and wincing when he has to put weight on his ankle.
With two big steps Shinsou is at his side, sidestepping the puddle of what Denki now realizes is his expensive conditioner. Can’t he catch a break?
The thought vanishes when Shinsou takes his hand to stabilize him, careful not to touch his wounds.
“Did you just say ‘Yeehaw’?” he asks, while Denki finds his footing. Denki nods.
“It just felt right, I don't know.” He looks up at Shinsou. “I’m cleaning this once I’m dressed, promise.”
“Dont worry about it, I can do it.”
“But-”
“Just focus on yourself, I don't want you to get hurt anymore than this.”
Denki clamps his mouth shut. Of course. Shinsou thinks he can't clean it up without making more of a mess of the day. With a nod he turns and limps over to his bedroom. He wants to collapse on the bed, but now that it's dried he can see the ring of dirt all over it. He looks over to his hamper and his spare sheets are in fact still in there. He will have to sleep on the couch.
Tears prick in his eyes again as he turns to his closet. With a huff and sniff he gets out short sweats - they are not booty shorts, as much as Sero insists - and his favorite oversized Pikachu shirt. This way his scraped knees aren’t going to stick to any fabric. He towels off his hair before getting dressed and then gets some fluffy socks.
Brushing his hair out he takes stock of himself in the mirror. His cheeks are red from the warm bath, almost hiding how red rimmed his eyes are. His wet hair is slowly darkening the shirt on his shoulders but he doesn't have the patience to blow dry it now - he would probably electrocute himself anyway. His knees are red and leaking fluid, the skin on his hands is tight when he flexes them and hurts.
At least he is cute in his shirt. He likes to be stylish when going out, but he also loves the look of just staying at home and cuddling into something (preferably Shinsou - yeah, right, as if that would happen) and his shirt and socks give exactly that.
He squares his shoulders, determined to find some cup ramen and is nearly to his door when he hears the doorbell ringing through the apartment. Almost immediately he can hear Shinsou walking to the door. Has he invited people over? Denki stops, still in his room. He doesn't know if he wants to see people today. Everything has been so much and he honestly just wants to chill on the couch, maybe watch something, eat some disappointing cup noodles and then fall asleep - preferably without moving to minimize the risk of fucking things up further. If there are other people he either needs to interact with them or stay in his room, on the floor or a stripped bed. He doesn't want to do either of those, but Shinsou has every right to have friends over. It's his apartment as well.
The bathroom! If they have guests they will want to use it and his conditioner is still all over the floor. That's a slipping hazard and with Denki’s luck someone will slip and fall, hitting their head and sue - and he will spend the rest of his life in crippling debt.
He starts walking again, trying to ignore the pain. He stumbles out of his room - directly into Shinsou’s arms.
“Woah, woah, slow down. The food won't run away.” Again, Shinsou catches and stabilizes him, his big hands squeezing Denki’s hip.
“Food?”
“Yeah, I ordered for us. Burgers, right? It just arrived.”
“I think I might love you.” As soon as the last word leaves his mouth Denki clamps his hand over it. Shinsou flushes a deep red.
“I mean-” Denki starts, scrambling for an explanation, “like a bro. Like you are saving my life today. Not like - you know, right? No homo.” He feels panicked. He can not screw up this friendship. No matter how much he really loves Shinsou in a full homo way, he cannot screw this up. He is the best friend he has ever had. The first one who managed to live with him for a prolonged time without fighting or trying to kill him; the first one to calm him down when he is hyper; the first one he can have those really deep talks with.
No matter how bad this day gets, this cannot happen.
Shinsou nods slowly. “Okay. Yeah, no, of course.” He carefully lets go of Denki’s waist, letting him stand by himself. “So do you want to eat?”
Crisis averted - with a sigh of relief Denki nods.
“Thank you for ordering.” It’s what he should have said all along. Then he remembers why he stormed out of his room in the first place. “What about the bathroom?”
“Already cleaned.”
“Thank you.” He doesn't deserve him. Shinsou always cleans a lot. Denki tries his best but he knows he is a whirlwind that leaves chaos - it's one of the reasons Katsuki moved out. With Shinsou at least he can try to make it up to him through cooking. But today Shinsou paid for food as well.
“I can pay you back,” he says as he walks to the couch. The take out boxes are already on the low table in front of it.
Shinsou shakes his head, watching his gait. “No need.”
“Dude, yes need. I already resigned myself to cup noodles. You're saving my day!”
“You cook often enough. Consider it me paying you back.” Shinsou plops down and reaches for a small tube. “You need more salve?”
Denki sits down next to him and flexes his hands. “Yes.”
Without saying anything Shinsou squeezes some on his fingers and starts to rub it in - first on his knees and then on his hands. His touch is gentle, not pressing on the sensitive skin, but gliding across it. It feels intimate, how close they sit, how softly his fingers stroke him. Denki holds his breath, not wanting to disturb the moment. He can indulge a little, right? Just a bit, just today, just until he feels better again.
It’s over far too quickly. Shinsou leans back, his eyes drifting to the table without stopping at Denki.
“Food?” he asks.
“Yes. You want to watch something?”
Shinsou nods. “I can put on the anime from last time, the basketball one. Here,” before grabbing the remote he grabs two boxes from the table and extends them to Denki. He opens them to find a double cheeseburger and fries. With a heavy, happy sigh he takes a fry and eats it. Still slightly crispy. Not bad for delivery.
“What did you get?” He watches as Shinsou unpacks his own burger.
“Black bean patty. With cheese as well.”
Denki nods. Carefully he lifts his burger out of the carton, placing the carton beneath him to catch any stray lettuce bits. He is just realizing how hungry he really is and digs in.
After the first few bites he sighs dreamily and leans back. Shinsou chuckles.
“What?” Denki asks.
“Feeling better?”
“Not so close to crying anymore.”
Shinsou’s turns his head to him and is about to say something, but stops himself when he sees him. He bites his lip instead.
“What?”
“Nothing,” Shinsou replies but his face betrays him. Something is up.
“Tell me!”
“I’m sorry,” Shinsou presses his lips together to keep from laughing, “it's just… your shirt.”
“My-?” Denki looks down and there, right on Pikachu’s belly is a big ketchup stain. “Dammit,” he curses, “what is wrong with me today.” Pouting, he stretches his shirt to get a better look at the stain. It’s definitely fresh. Can he not be cool around Shinsou, just once? Does he have to cry and behave and - apparently - eat like a toddler?
Distraught, he looks up and sees Shinsou extending his hoodie. “Here, wear this. I’m warm anyway.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, of course. I can just get another one if I get cold.”
“I could just get another shirt.”
“Not with your ankle.”
With a small smile Denki nods. He doesn’t look at Shinsou as he shucks his shirt and pulls the hoodie over his head. It’s too big, just like his shirt, but at least two times more comfortable. And it smells like Shinsou. Carefully he pulls the sleeves over his hands and makes sweater paws.
He looks up to see Shinsou already watching him.
“It’s too big,” Denki shrugs.
“It suits you,” Shinsou replies and shifts. He extends the box with his burger back to him. Denki didn't even notice him taking it.
“Thank you.” He eats the rest extra carefully and is grateful when he manages not to spill anything else.
They keep watching the anime in silence after eating. Normally, with anyone else of his friends, even Katsuki, Denki would scoot close, rest his head on a shoulder or throw his legs across a lap. But with Shinsou he can't. Ever since they met he has been crushing on him and it made him careful with his touches. He overthinks them, scared to be too much for the distant and aloof man that fascinates him so much. With time, he had been sure, he would find flaws, his crush would fizzle out but that never happened. Every apparent flaw endeared Shinsou more to him.
His lack of sleep and the coffee addiction and deep eyebags it brought with it only made him smell really good and look really hot.
His need for quiet only made Denki more considerate of his surroundings.
His cleanliness was straight up something Denki profited from, even if he felt guilty about it, but it made him improve his cooking.
His abnormal fascination with cats isn't even a flaw to begin with. It’s just cute.
So his crush didn't fizzle out, instead it got worse. It developed and evolved from ‘Man, this guy is hot!’ to ‘Oh and he is sweet and funny as well’ until it finally arrived at ‘I love him’. By that time they had been living together and had been best friends and everything became too much of a risk. If he confesses and Shinsou doesn't feel the same it will be awkward - with their shared friend group, their shared apartment and most importantly with each other. Denki decided right away that he’d rather have a friendship and great roommate and be single instead of risking losing it all.
His eyes focus back on the screen, but he missed so much, being lost in thought he probably has to rewatch a few episodes. Denki yawns.
“What are you going to do about your bed?” Shinsou asks without looking at him.
Denki turns his head to see him frown, eyes turned to the front. His fingers play with the hem of his shirt.
“I thought of sleeping here tonight.” He gestures to the couch.
Shinsou doesn't say anything, just nods and keeps watching. A few minutes later he speaks again.
“Isn't that uncomfortable?”
“What?” Denki just got back into watching.
“The couch.”
“Oh.” He shrugs. “It beats the floor at least. Or do you have a second pair of sheets?” he asks hopefully. “I’ll wash them of course.”
Shinsou stills. He seems to be thinking. “Also dirty right now,” he finally says. He sits up and reaches for the remote, pausing the show. Then he turns to Denki. He seems nervous.
“What?” Denki prompts.
“You could- you dont have to of course- I don't want you to feel uncomfortable- It's probably a bad idea, but-” He stops talking. Denki has never seen him this agitated.
“What?” he asks more insistently, having the smallest hunch where this might go and no idea how to answer if he is right.
“My bed is pretty big,” Shinsou says.
Denki just looks at him.
“You could… we wouldn't even have to touch. We can put pillows in the middle or something. But it would be a bed.”
Denki stares and swallows harshly. He shouldn't. He really really shouldn't. If anything his offer to put pillows between them made it perfectly clear that Shinsou does not want Denki in any other way than a friend.
But he had such a bad day. He deserves it, right? Deserves one night in the same bed as Shinsou. Even with pillows between them. The patented anti-gay middle schooler wall. It already hurts a bit, he would have thought that Shinsou isn't like that, being pan and all. Maybe he is just like that with Denki. Maybe - oh god - maybe he noticed his crush and wants to make sure he doesn't encourage him.
Fuck, thats gonna hurt tomorrow. It almost definitely will be a worse day than today.
“Denki?”
Fuck it.
“Yeah, yes. That sounds… pillows, yes. Thanks. For offering.”
Shinsou smiles at him. “Of course, anytime.”
A dangerous offer.
“You wanna go now? You must be exhausted.”
He is exhausted. But this is Shinsou he is talking to. He will be up for hours. It’s barely 10pm.
“Are you staying here?”
“Uhm, no. I’m actually- work was a lot today. So I’m tired. I could go to bed.” Shinsou stretches his arms over his head and the way his biceps bulges is just not fair.
Maybe this was a bad idea. It could end up being torturous.
Denki gets up. “I’m gonna get a new shirt to sleep in.”
“Okay, I’m gonna get everything ready.”
Shinsou gets their take out boxes and brings them into the kitchen, while Denki shuffles into his room. Once inside he shuts the door and leans against it.
“Okay,” he mumbles to himself. “Be cool. This is a sleepover. Like in middle school. With a pillow wall. You get to sleep in a bed and it won’t mean anything, just that you are good friends that can sleep in a bed together without it meaning anything. That’s cool. Shinsou’s a great friend. The best. This is great actually. You get to be even better friends.”
He gets a new Pikachu shirt (of course he has two, who do you think he is?) and clutches the hoodie when walking over to Shinsou’s room.
The door is open and Shinsou is standing at the foot of his bed, holding pillows from the couch, contemplating. He turns to Denki.
“I only have one blanket.” He gestures to the bed. “It’s big, so we can still use pillows, if you want, but just so you know.”
“We don’t- we don’t need to,” Denki replies. “The pillows I mean. I don't need them.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?” It comes out more annoyed than he means to. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine. Nevermind it.”
Denki does mind it, but he doesn't say anything. Everything is so fragile today.
After a short exchange about who takes which side (Denki gets the left, further from the door), they slip under the covers. The cover, singular. He can feel every one of Shinsou’s movements, the blanket moving against him and rustling quietly. When they both finally settled Denki is wired - with the knowledge that Shinsou is right there, that they are currently sharing a bed, a blanket, that he is still wearing that goddamn shirt and that this is going to be a long night.
He turns on his side and finds Shinsou already looking at him. He pulls the blanket up to his face, covering everything but his eyes and whispers, “Why wouldn't I be sure? About the pillows?”
Shinsou’s eyes widen, he can make it out even in the darkness.
For a while he doesn't say anything, just watches Denki watching him. Then he closes his eyes, seemingly in defeat and whispers, barely audible, “You never touch me.”
Denki sits up, eyes wide. “What?”
Shinsou keeps his eyes squeezed shut and rushes the words out. “Not never, but also not like your other friends. You touch them all the time. But not me. Not in the same way, so I thought, you don't want to… you know, because I’m pan and everything.”
Denki shakes his head, trying to make sense of this.
“Because you’re pan? What has that to do with-? Why wouldn't I want to touch you because of that?”
“It’s cool,” Shinsou immediately reassures him, which it obviously isn't. “I know some straight guys are afraid, or rather don't want to get hit on, but you're my best friend, Denki. I would never do that. I respect our friendship and you, you know that, right?”
“Wait. Wait, wait, wait. Hold up,” Denki is flabbergasted. “I'm the homophobic straight guy in this scenario?” He is bi! Always has been! Well, since he was 14, but that's as good as always.
“Yeah?”
“Shinsou! I’m not straight. I’m bi!” Denki cards a hand through his hair. God, his conditioner is good. He needs a new bottle soon.
“What?”