Chapter Text
There are people who are born lucky.
There is a spiel about how all of them have an equal chance at happiness of course – but with billions and billions of humans all over the earth, running into your soulmate is a bit of a gamble.
Some spend years, decades of their life struggling to find their one true love. If they come to their senses, they recognize that although soulmates could add to their lives, there is more to living than finding just one person. That there is just as much love that can be found in family and friends, in the beauty of the world, or a love that is not destined. They stop throwing their hard-earned wages into thin air, stop traveling to meet soul-searcher groups, and stop introducing themselves to so many people who they never bother to get to know besides a surface greeting and a check to see if they are compatible.
But there are hard cases. Determined people.
They are referred to as determined, because any other way of referring to them would be cruel. What can you say to someone who sacrificed their entire life in pursuit of something they never found? When on their deathbed, they still have yet to grasp that one thing, but threw away everything else they had?
Soulmates are not rare, no. But the chances of finding yours are entirely up to fate, even for the richest folks. Because even if you have all that money to travel, how could you possibly hope to meet everyone on this gigantic planet? Can one even use the term ‘soulmates’, if the fated meeting some people spend their whole life waiting for, never happens for so many? If the metaphorical red string never connects them to anyone?
Ren, although he’s been fascinated by the concept as a kid, has accepted that finding his soulmate and forging a mental link with them – which resulted in telepathy, ergo was a pretty large warning sign that the person you just ran into was your person – would be as much up to chance as winning the lottery. He became one of the many who continue on with their lives as if they didn’t live in a world where you could find a perfect partner. Ren would be happy to meet them, of course, but he doesn’t go out of his way to visit any soulmate meet-and-greets or take part in festivals in an attempt to find his special someone.
After all, if he really is destined to be with someone, why shouldn’t he meet them?
It is a heartless world, where you forever remain star-crossed lovers, with the object of your affections never actually in your life.
Maybe there are simply people who do not have soulmates, and people who do, but Ren has never been too invested in that kind of research. There is no way of distinguishing the two, if there even is a distinction – it’s just, everyone knows that when you meet face-to-face, you will be able to hear their thoughts and they yours. A harmonization of minds, followed by the alignment of hearts and the souls becoming one.
If Ren is fully honest, he doesn’t expect to meet his soulmate any time soon. Maybe sometime after he graduates, when he is no longer living in a little town in the middle of nowhere.
And then the incident happens and Ren is no longer living in the middle of nowhere.
***
Tokyo is so full of life; people are everywhere, on the streets, on the trains, shattering any personal space Ren wants to hold onto.
He is accosted by no less than four soul-searchers on his first day alone.
Out of the three girls, and the one guy, none of them are his person; and he is not theirs.
Still, while it rattles him, the experience also readies him for what is to come; after all, Tokyo is not only the capital of Japan, but a city with millions of people in it.
After the first month, Ren is used to random people stopping him at the street to stare into his eyes.
It never works.
That never dissuades the people trying.
Ren never tries to dissuade them either.
“I dunno how you can take it, dude,” Ryuji comments once, when they are walking to a ramen place together. He stares after the two girls disappearing into the crowd, a frown marring his usually sunny face. “Doesn’t it get old?”
Ren shrugs. “It doesn’t hurt to let them try.”
“Yeah, but there are so many of them! I’d think you were a stuck up model if I didn’t know better,” Ryuji complains, and Ren laughs. It’s true that he gets flagged down a lot more than his best friend, but he doesn’t think much of it. It’s a different kind of attention than the whispers and snide glances he receives in school as the resident ‘troublemaker’ and he welcomes the difference.
“Knowing your luck, one of these days you are actually going to run into your soulmate.” Ryuji is shaking his head disparagingly. He is not exactly going out of his way to meet his soulmate, Ren knows, but the blond has confessed to going to a few meet-and-greets on occasion.
“I’d actually have to be lucky for that,” he mutters.
He doesn’t consider how, even though he was unceremoniously sentenced as a child criminal, his luck has been on the rise ever since he arrived in Tokyo.
He certainly doesn’t expect to run into his soulmate, just a few weeks after having this conversation.
***
The TV studio was a bad idea, Ren thinks, muffling a yawn. He listens to Ryuji and Ann bicker about the hell of a day they had. Thankfully, the topic soon moves to where they should go to relax after said day. Ren has to admit, he zones out a bit – it’s a self-defense mechanism, after all the talk the tour guide bored them to hell with – only focusing back on when Morgana speaks up.
“-wanna go to that huge pancake-looking place we passed on the way here!”
Amusement park, Ren notes as the conversation continues over his head. Sounds great – will definitely get his blood pumping and wake him up.
He is about to voice his agreement, when someone shows up behind Ann and Ryuji.
“Excuse me,” his dark, almost red eyes immediately lock with Ren’s, “I couldn’t help but notice your uniforms. Are you students of Shujin Academy?”
Joker and his posse look just as utterly idiotic outside the Metaverse as inside it.
Ren straightens.
…huh?
Mediocrity seems to be a standard, the voice continues, smooth as a knife that could plunge into someone’s heart without any trouble. Those glasses are even more hideous up close. And what did he even do with his hair? Does he think it looks cool? It does not.
Ren, head empty, except for the voice filling it, stares at the boy with a lilting voice, and a shy smile. “-happened to be passing by, so it seemed polite to greet you. We’ll be filming together after all.”
At least you are making this all the more easy, oh fearless Leader of the Phantom Thieves, the voice continues sarcastically, I won’t have to bother staging another random encounter for us to introduce ourselves.
“Ah, where are my manners?” He affects a little laugh (fake), and holds a gloved hand to his face. He keeps eye contact with Ren as he smiles. “My name is Goro Akechi.”
Ren’s brain kicks back in.
…holy shit you're hot.
Akechi – Goro? Can Ren call him by his first name already? …better not, not yet – blinks, and tilts his head as trying to place the stray thought Ren just projected into his head, like he’s been projecting his own thoughts the whole time.
Is he…? No, there is no way.
Ren carefully keeps his mind blank. Soulmate connections usually need a while to strengthen, to be able to send images and abstract concepts between the partners, so that’s what he tries; visualizing the blank bleakness of his cell in the Velvet Room.
Ann and Ryuji begin to question Akechi, and Ren keeps his breathing under control. He cannot allow himself even a second to consider what he just heard (not heard, telepathy is decidedly not hearing), because if he does, then-
Your little guard dogs are much more vocal than you are, Joker. I wonder if that is part of the persona you play up for the public? Akechi’s thoughts flow into Ren’s mind as if he were whispering the words right into his ear. There is a certain amusement in his tone. That’s just another one of our similarities.
What is, Ren wonders without being able to stop himself.
It’s- Akechi cuts himself off. Ren has the front row seat to his widening eyes, hears a cacophony of noise that is a myriad of thoughts all flooding through Akechi’s mind, until they all coalesce into one; YOU HEARD ALL THAT AND DIDN’T SAY SHIT?!
Ren lives to contradict people, and his soulmate doesn’t seem to be an exception. I did say you were hot – are hot –, you know. He lets Akechi digest the thought. You seemed preoccupied with monologuing.
…there’s no fucking way.
Akechi takes a deep breath, and to Ren, he sounds like he is having trouble with breathing as a whole, as he lets out a shaky half-laugh. “Oh, would you look at the time, sadly I have to get going…”
Pretty sure we should talk about this, Ren thinks, in Akechi’s vague direction.
Akechi doesn’t reply, choosing to turn his back to them without waiting for a goodbye of any kind and swiftly walking off.
Ren doesn’t waste a second in shoving his bag with Morgana in it at Ann and running after Akechi.
Akechi, who only speeds up.
STOP FUCKING FOLLOWING ME!
Stop running, Ren shoots back silently. He and Ryuji have been training for weeks now – and Akechi has nothing on his best friend.
Except for the location they are in.
“-kechi-kun,” calls the bouncer as Akechi bolts through a door. Said bouncer blinks in surprise, then his eyes find Ren, and they narrow in suspicion.
Ren comes to a halt, cheeks slightly flushed. “I really need to talk to him,” he tries, but he already knows it’s in vain. Akechi is on the other side of that door and Ren will not be allowed in.
…well played, he has to admit. He was so busy with the thought of having found his soulmate that he didn’t stop to pay attention to his surroundings.
He can practically hear Akechi’s smug smile. You have to try harder if you wish to match me, Amamiya-kun.
Ren wonders if he actually pulled himself together so fast or if he is just pretending, for Ren’s or his own sake, but also-
…you know my name?
He doesn’t receive an answer to that one. If Ren had to wager a guess, he’d say Akechi swiftly booked it on the other side of the door, to get ‘out of range’, so to speak. Newly realized connections are very fragile that way.
He isn’t exactly sure why, but he gets the feeling Akechi’s blushing.
Or maybe the villainous monologue wasn’t just for show earlier, he continues the thought, and Akechi is actually scowling and planning his revenge.
“-so get lost before I call the security on you, kid.” The bouncer glares at Ren.
He nods, mind faraway. He… definitely didn’t anticipate today going the way it did.
He walks off, the bare bones of a plan forming in his mind… Akechi will probably try to get him blacklisted from the studio, but if he can somehow still sneak in…
“Dude! What the hell was that?!” Ryuji declares, suddenly all up in Ren’s personal space.
He, Ann and Morgana all rattle off questions at him, as Ren just blinks.
He holds up a hand to silence them.
“I heard him.” He taps his head. His friends all gasp. “He… had a few interesting comments.”
“And what, he just ran off after he realized you heard him?!” Morgana meowls, aghast.
Ren shakes his head slightly. “Not here.” With his friends there… He’d be able to sneak in, even if Akechi got him blacklisted. He could use a back-up plan, and he could definitely use a chance to talk about soulmate stuff.
“To the amusement park, then?” Ann offers hesitantly. She holds Ren’s bag with Morgana in it out to Ren.
He takes it with a smile. “Sure. We could call Yusuke too, just to fill him in.”
“Yusuke?” Ryuji asks, eyebrows drawn together, even as he digs his phone out. “I mean, yeah I get that you’d want him to know, but…”
Ren smiles mysteriously, even as he feels worry pool in his stomach. He doesn’t have much concrete evidence, but… His friends, his thieves should know.
He hopes this turns out to be a misunderstanding, but he doubts he’d be that lucky, after having probably used up all of his luck today for meeting his soulmate.
A part of him, one he thought he buried as a child, is bouncing in joy. He found his soulmate. They will work out whatever misunderstanding just happened and be happy together.
Right?
***
Yusuke joins them as they stand in line for the ferris wheel, and once they actually climb into a cabin, Ren begins to fill them all in, starting with, “I think the Black Mask is my soulmate.”
His thieves listen, wide-eyed, and loudly questioning throughout the whole tale, debating the topic back and forth. It isn’t until they are on the ground once more, that Ryuji shakes his head. “...that was a lot,” he says. “And I dunno about you, but I need some hardcore adrenaline to drive all the worrying out of me.”
“A rush of positive emotions would indeed be a reprieve at the moment,” Yusuke agrees. “No offense meant, of course,” he says to Ren.
He huffs. “None taken.” He glances at Ann. “Do you want to swing by the food stalls first?”
She nods, smiling gently at him. “Sure.”
“Grab us some grub too, okay?” Ryuji asks, before unceremoniously dragging Yusuke off. Morgana ends up coming with Ann and Ren, but he doesn’t say much, looking introspective for once.
“If Akechi is Black Mask,” the cat says, chewing on the words slowly, “then we’re in big trouble, soulmates or not.”
“That’s what I wanted to talk about,” Ren replies quietly, bumping his arm into Ann’s shoulder. “Thanks for noticing.”
Ann brightens, but even she seems muted somehow. “But of course! You’re my friend and we’re maybe-kinda in similar situations.” She winces. “I mean, Mika isn’t really going around hurting people – well she is, but not like that, I don’t think, but… Yeah.” She puffs out her cheeks, before stuffing a crepe in it. She waves. “Go on, Ren-kun. Ask away.”
Ren huffs out a little laugh. “Right, right.” He had stray questions, but he is not really sure if he could ask them in an actually comprehensive manner… “How were you… so positive, even after she…?”
“Rejected our bond in a fit of rage?” Ann finishes for him. She is the one bumping into his shoulder now. “I had my amazing friend right there with me.”
Ren smiles faintly, but that’s not the answer he is really looking for.
Ann sighs. “Mika… took a bit to calm down and gather herself.” She bites her lip. “I guess she thought she’d be getting some hot and mature actor as a soulmate, and she got me? Things are obviously not that romantic between us yet, but she actually reached out with the idea of us going on ‘get to know each other’ dates.”
Ren listens patiently, despite having heard parts of this before. He takes some of the street food they got, and tears a small bite off of a roll for Morgana.
“She still thinks some pretty mean things about me, but they almost seem affectionate? Like, she is a bitch and she knows it, but her comments somehow all turn into her building me up? Telling me to be more confident in myself and stuff.” There is a smile dancing on Ann’s lips. She has a bit of cream smeared on the side, and Ren can’t decide if she has lipstick on or not. Mika’s been pretty open about giving her gifts, to ‘raise Ann’s standards’ as she put it. “And you should have seen how terrified she was of meeting my parents and Shiho.” Ann snorts. “There is a lot more to her than you’d think at first.”
“Are you gonna introduce her to us too?” Ren asks mischievously. Even the idea of Mika trying to behave herself near Ryuji or Yusuke is enough to make him giggle.
Ann is clearly picturing something similar, based on her snickering.
“She doesn’t like cats,” Morgana butts in, headbutting Ren’s hand for more snacks. “She’s clearly a terrible person.”
“Oh, if she were an animal she’d probably be a scorpion or a viper,” Ann quips without preamble. But she is smiling, softly, and Ren thinks, good for her, and also, is this going to be me soon? “But I’m not perfect either and she’s willing to work on herself. We can help each other, I think.”
“You’re great together,” Ren reassures her, feeling a bit more settled himself. Again, he has a basic idea for tomorrow, but after that? All of it will depend on how Akechi reacts.
Maybe there is something in ‘meant to be’, Ren thinks, allowing himself to be hopeful about the future.
***
Goro used to idealize soulmates.
A perfect partner the universe made just for you? The perfect playdate, the perfect studymate; someone who could keep up with his wit and love and appreciate Goro for all the good things in him?
And then mother left him. Being passed around in so many foster homes after, some of which held soulmate-couples who weren’t all that actually perfect parents you’d expect them to be, Goro has learnt that there is little value in soulmates. That he can’t keep hoping for a valiant knight to come save him from all the horrors of the world, to love him unconditionally. His mother was supposed to love him without restraints and look where that got her?
Goro, frankly and plainly, gave up on finding his soulmate.
He would have been the happiest if they never met, really – his Detective Prince image was a much easier sell when he was single and ‘available’ too. His rapidly growing fanbase could hope to one day run into him, gaze into his eyes and hear a sweet crooning in their own mind…
Pfft. As if Goro’s head was filled with sunshine and rainbows.
It’s a ridiculous idea, and yet, he feeds into it – let them reduce him to just a pretty face. Let them underestimate him, as long as they know his name, as long as they talk about him, as long as they help him achieve his ultimate goal-
Then, there is a hiccup in his plans by the name of Ren Amamiya, or, as he is also known; Joker.
Goro would really appreciate the dramatic irony more if it wasn’t his own life.
As it is, he will not allow some silly soulmate of his to just come in all willy-nilly and ruin the webs and traps Goro’s been meticulously laying for the past two years. He worked way too hard for it all to come together.
…if it doesn’t work, for any given reason, Goro doesn’t think he will be sane enough to go on.
Which leads him to be anxious, but also, set in his way as he walks into the studio the next morning. He thought about asking for Amamiya to be blacklisted from the TV studio, but then the case would undoubtedly make its way back to his sperm donor and part of Goro doesn’t want Shido to hear Amamiya’s name at all, even if it would have come with a false accusation of him being Goro’s stalker.
Perhaps he should have stayed behind to talk yesterday, but Goro barely kept it together after arriving into his assigned changing room as it is. Besides, he’s had some more time to come up with topics he absolutely must not bring up while around Amamiya, even in his own mind, and some ways of mitigating the incident.
He hopes to catch Amamiya with some inane excuse after the show, and maybe exchange phone numbers. His soulmate is cumbersome, even without Goro having known him for long, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be better in the long run if Goro keeps an eye on him. One could say that’s even the socially expected thing for him to do, keep tabs on his soulmate.
Goro’s nose wrinkles, before he smooths it out consciously. Soulmate is such an asinine, childish word. As if his soul would actually have a perfect replica – or a perfect partner.
Goro has met both sides of his soul, and neither Robin nor Loki are exactly pretty.
And Joker… Well, Goro doesn’t think that the brat who has only advanced as far as he did by sheer dumb luck is… – well, let’s just say he has a few complaints to the universe. Like, why does his soulmate go around with those ridiculous glasses? Goro doesn’t even know the color of his eyes, they were so obstructed by the lenses and his fringe the last time they met.
(And then Goro was preoccupied with running and not having a panic attack where anyone could find him, so there is that too.)
Point is, Goro is as ready as he could ever be, when he walks into the blinding lights of the reflectors. He exchanges pleasantries with the reporters, and is eternally thankful that this is not a live show, but rather, a taping, even if there is a live audience.
Speaking of said audience…
Goro’s eyes roam over the students – one more dull than the next – and… There, in the second row, with his little lap dogs right beside him, sits Ren Amamiya. He is staring at Goro straight on, but doesn’t try to make conversation, even though they are close enough for it to work.
Goro forces his gaze to move on.
He couldn’t see Amamiya’s face, not with all these reflectors blinding him, but it’s not like Joker will be able to sit through the whole interview in silence. Goro has only been watching him for a while, and even so, he knows that Amamiya lacks the patience or the ability to hold a grudge for that long.
Goro focuses back on the interview. Predictably, and, in accordance with the bullet points they discussed earlier, the announcers bring up the case of the Phantom Thieves.
Goro jokes and plays up his public persona, but he has a clear goal with this interview today; to plant a seed. And never let it be said that he cannot make right by an opportunity that’s been practically dropped into his lap.
“If these Phantom Thieves are real… I believe they should be tried in a court of law.”
He can feel the surprise emanating from Joker and his little lackeys… Goro is almost disappointed. What, didn’t think I’d say that, did you?
Amamiya doesn’t answer.
Goro’s eyes keep straying back to him as he explains himself; but soon enough, there is the request for the audience participation that he’s been warned about… Meaning that Goro has a quick minute to himself.
He is patient, yes. But part of him doesn’t even think twice before needling Amamiya.
You’re quiet today.
For the first time in what feels like forever, he hears the other’s voice. Didn’t want to distract you. Amamiya sounds as infuriating as he did yesterday, when asking Goro not to run from him.
Goro can almost hear the shrug in his mental voice. It takes a lot of energy to keep himself from scowling.
Distract me? Oh, please. Just to prove his own point, Goro replies to the announcer’s question, emotions and affectations all in the right place. Is Amamiya seriously assuming he can’t multitask? You don’t get to where I am without picking up some necessary skills.
I can’t decide if you’re underselling or overselling yourself, Amamiya says.
Well, Goro can’t decide if he likes the fact that he knows Amamiya would be smiling if he were to say these words aloud, or not.
Got beauty and brains… Does that leave me with brawn?
Goro huffs. He vaguely agrees to something about audience participation. If that was supposed to be a pick-up line, it could use some work. Besides, rather than those arbitrary traits, I much prefer a more philosophical take on the matter – like Hegel’s thesis and antithesis theory…
I’m only somewhat familiar, Amamiya replies, and Goro has to remind himself that he is having a conversation. It’s been getting so comfortable, he even brought Hegel up without a second thought… That is worrying. Is the third synthesis? Something new coming into existence after the other two clash?
A rudimentary understanding of the topic, but yes, Goro finds his lips drawing into a smile. You don’t really read philosophy, do you?
I will start to. I need to keep up with you.
Goro does his best to mask how much that response pleases him.
He registers that one of the announcers has gone up to the crowd and just happened to stop in front of Amamiya, microphone in front of him. What are you going to say, Goro can’t help but wonder, leaning forward in his seat slightly. What would you think of the Phantom Thieves? He adds, slightly mockingly.
Amamiya leans forward to meet the microphone. His eyes are locked onto Goro’s, as he says, They do more than the cops.
Goro affects a laugh, as he leans back. “Should I fear for my own job then?” he asks, grinning. No one laughs along with him.
In fact, the studio as a whole seems to have gone silent. Only the whirring of the machinery remains as everyone holds back their breath.
Goro replays the last few moments in his head, not understanding until-
He gasps, gloved hand flying to his face to cover his mouth. “You…”
…fucking bastard, what have you DONE?!
And Amamiya has the gall to smile. “...oh.” He holds his own head, as if he were hearing Goro for the first time.
This is the catharsis that shatters the silence; for everyone starts speaking all at once, about how this is clearly a soulmate meeting, and Goro can hear crying, and yelling, and the announcer is swiftly moving towards him, dragging Amamiya in tow-
It is chaos, unapologetic and beautiful, but Goro cannot revel in it, because once this gets out, all his carefully laid plans will fall to ruin.
***
They get to go to Goro’s changing room, courtesy of the announcer and a few execs’ quick thinking. The interview is suspended for the time being; some of the audience members – hopeful young girls who have yet to meet their soulmate and were clearly gunning for Goro – are still crying.
Amamiya stands in the middle of the room, hands shoved into his pockets, as the door closes on them.
Goro leans on his table, watching his soulmate in the mirror. They have not exchanged a single word on the way here.
(Goro was too busy focusing on keeping his breathing even, and his mind carefully blank.)
Amamiya’s eyes are on him; meeting Goro’s through the mirror.
“I don’t think I introduced myself,” he says, clearly having decided that he will go first. But you don’t need me to, do you?
Goro huffs. “What are you talking about?” This game of switching between mental and verbal speech is admittedly a trick he should have anticipated and not fallen for. He will reprimand himself later, though.
“My name.” Amamiya doesn’t step closer, but his glasses glint dangerously. If Goro spends a moment too long breathing, he will start to smell something unfamiliar – his soulmate. You called me by both of my names.
Goro shakes his head, turning to face his supposed other half. “What are you talking about?” he repeats. “I don’t know your name. Both names?” He frowns, before putting on a strained smile. “Please tell me you’re not a gangster. That’d make my job very hard indeed.”
You called me Joker at least twice, and Amamiya once.
Goro lets himself take a step forward. “Is that your name? Amamiya?” He forms the name carefully, as if it were something precious.
Amamiya’s face remains unchanged. Why are you trying to deflect, Akechi-kun?
Goro straightens. “Oh, please. You of all people should have the courtesy of calling me by my first name.” He even offers a smile.
Amamiya’s cheeks turn pink. “The same to you, Goro.”
He says Goro’s name like it is something precious.
Goro ignores the fluttering in his stomach. He cocks his head to the side, posing. “But I don’t know your name…”
Yes, Goro is more inclined towards philosophy, but there is a very apt saying; gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss. Goro has not yet given up on following such sage advice.
(The slightly bloodier alternative is of course, mansplain, manipulate, manslaughter, but Goro is trying to keep his hands clean, at least in the real world.)
“It’s Ren. But you already know that, don’t you?” Amamiya – Ren, if he really insists, is shorter than Goro by a bit, but in the middle of the room like that, he seems freakishly tall. Would you please drop the act and talk to me like a real person?
“I am talking to you like a real person,” Goro answers in his custom-made cheery tone. “Ren-kun,” he adds, when he sees Ren rear up for another try, “I wanted to apologize for yesterday.”
“Y-you did?” The flush increases ever so slightly. Up close like this, although the glasses and his hair still obscure a lot, Goro can make out Ren’s eyelashes. He still can’t decide what color his eyes are though, which is a shame.
“Yes.” Goro smiles sorrowfully. “I was so startled, I ran off without giving us a chance to talk. I’m terribly sorry.” He offers his hand. “Could we, perhaps, start over again?”
A shadow travels through Ren’s face, but doesn’t linger for long. “Of course.” Instead of taking the handshake as Goro would have expected, Ren grabs his gloved hand and leans down to press his lips against it.
Goro gets a sudden itch to get rid of his gloves.
Which is an absurd notion – get rid of his gloves to feel Ren’s lips on his bare skin? Laughable.
“Aren’t you a flirt,” he murmurs, making sure to leak some distaste into his voice. Ren, looking up at him from under his dark hair, winks.
“Only for you, honey.”
Goro feels heat climb up his face. He looks to the side. Changed tactics I see.
Goro will just have to acclimate himself. He can’t let Ren win their little encounter.
Can’t bore you with the same questions forever, can I? Ren says, and it takes Goro a hot second to realize Ren heard his thought.
He laughs, as he draws his hand back, as if he were doing it naturally. Ren straightens, and yes, he is a bit shorter than Goro, but not enough for it to be a problem. There is every chance he’ll grow even taller, as they should be about the same age, and Goro is still growing too, so-
He shuts the thought down.
I’m surprised you’re not more angry at me, Ren continues, when Goro fails to take back control of the conversation.
“Angry? Why would I be angry at you?” Goro smiles at his soulmate, vapid and cheerful, again, careful to keep his mind blank and his emotions at bay. “You’re my soulmate, Ren-kun.”
Ren lets out a labored breath that spells a victory for Goro. He just has to keep going.
He takes a step forward, followed by another one and another one. Ren is backing away at first, slowly, eyes wide behind his glasses, but before he can speed up, he smacks against the wall and Goro has him cornered.
Goro doesn’t know what his expression looks like right now. He doesn’t care much to control it.
“What reason,” he begins, reaching out to grab those awful glasses off of the bridge of Ren’s nose, “would I have,” Ren doesn’t even try to protest, and the glasses leave his nose, “to be angry at my soulmate?” He drinks in the sight of Ren’s eyes, free of any obscuring walls. They are a heavy gray, the color of a rainy day, one during which Goro loves to curl up and read with something hot to drink. Gray, like the steel of his briefcase; gray like the vest of Joker’s outfit.
(Gray like the barrel of a gun. Glinting very similarly, as well.)
“You tell me,” Ren whispers, pupils blown wide, and staring at Goro. As he speaks, his warm breath hits Goro in the face, and he has to wonder if Ren ate a mint gum or something before this. He certainly shouldn’t have a fresh breath otherwise, and it certainly adds to the theory that he’s planned this-
Planned what?
Goro hums.
He carefully closes Ren’s glasses.
And then he throws them aside without a care in the world.
“...I kinda need those,” Ren points out. Even if they’re just fakes.
Goro smiles beatifically. “Why would you even need them if they are fake?”
I don’t like people staring me in the eyes, Ren says, even as he keeps eye-contact with Goro. He hasn’t made a single move, or given any indication that he wants to reverse their positions or run for the door.
Good.
“You’re staring at me right now,” Goro argues, before adding, “besides, it’s a crime to hide such beautiful eyes.”
Ren’s breath catches, and Goro thinks his eyes stray to Goro’s lips for a beat.
He draws it into another practiced smile. “But you know a lot about crime, don’t you?”
So we’re finally talking about it?
Goro ignores him, preferring to continue aloud. “After all, you wouldn’t have hijacked the show if you didn’t have an inclination for things on the darker side of the law.” As he talks, he trails finger over Ren’s arm. It being summer, his uniform is lacking a jacket and Ren’s pale skin is smooth to the touch. He seems to be getting goosebumps though, Goro notes as his fingers wander from Ren’s wrist to his shoulder.
He grins, feeling like Loki’s standing behind him, projecting through him.
“In that regard, I think anger would be putting it rather lightly.” Almost playfully, he grazes his nails over Ren’s skin, barely applying pressure just yet. “You see, I am quite furious.”
Ren inhales, and it’s probably not just Goro’s imagination to see him have problems with it. “You’re mad that I accidentally revealed our bond on TV?” He winces as he says it, likely realizing how ridiculous he sounds.
A wave of unrestrained, all-consuming wrath surges through Goro. ‘Accidentally’ my ass.
He grits his teeth and forces it back down.
It’s too late.
Goro’s fingers trail up to Ren’s shoulder.
“It was an accident,” Ren tells him, frown on his face, and earnestness in his voice. “Goro, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to out you- us, I- I just…” He gulps, falling silent.
Goro taps his fingers rhythmically against Ren’s shoulder.
“Do you want to try that again?” He asks as sweetly as he can manage.
Ren meets his eyes, with something like a smile and a challenge in said smile. You love being right, don’t you?
Goro chuckles darkly. “Don’t think me such a horrible detective that I wouldn’t notice my own soulmate lying to me.” He presses closer to Ren. “What were you hoping to accomplish?”
“It was a bit of a spur-of-the-moment decision,” Ren replies, also leaning closer. “I didn’t want to risk you running off again.”
Stupid fucking idiot, Goro thinks venomously before he can stop himself. Ren beams.
“You truly have a way with words, honey.”
In response, Goro sinks his manicured nails into Ren’s exposed skin. The red marks on his neck will be visible from afar, both a sign of hurt, and a sign of Goro. As much as he wants to deny, the thought fills him with satisfaction.
Ren only huffs out a laugh. “Would you have stayed otherwise?” He asks, as if he weren’t inconvenienced by Goro attempting to claw some sense into him.
“I would have,” you absolute buffoon, Goro finishes in his mind. “I had the decent thought of finding you after the taping was over.” And asking for your number.
“Oh.” Ren looks to the ground, but then he is back to looking at Goro and gives him a soft smile. I would have happily given you my number. Still would.
Goro rolls his eyes. His heart rate picking up is an entirely unrelated matter of course.
“Not that that really matters right now, of course,” Goro continues, as if Ren didn’t say a thing, “seeing as, by now, I’m sure at least one person has already released the info on social media.” His throat constricts at the idea and he suddenly remembers that his phone is in this room with them, even if silenced. Who knows how many calls already await him.
And why is that a problem? Ren tilts his head, exposing more skin to Goro’s clawing. “Wanted to hide me in your closet, honey?”
You are so fucking stupid, Goro thinks. You have no idea what you-
He cuts himself off, taking a deep breath and blowing off some steam by trying to draw blood with his nails. Seeing as they are well-cared for, and thus, not very sharp, it's a challenge, but one Goro will happily rise above.
(And, again, Ren doesn’t seem to mind the contact one bit.
Makes Goro briefly wonder what other pains his soulmate would – well, perhaps the assumption is presumptuous, but he isn’t a detective for nothing – enjoy.
Goro banishes the thoughts and is very glad for once that they came with images and not words. He would not like to have explained himself to Ren, but as it is, their bond is still fresh enough that images won’t make it through for a while.)
So tell me. Ren catches Goro’s free hand in his, gray eyes staring intently into Goro’s. Tell me what I’m missing.
“We don’t have all day, Ren-kun,” Goro grits out, trying for sunshine, but only getting halfway to it. The idea that the clock has been ticking all this time is suddenly pressing onto him. Any plans he came up with the previous day are scrapped, or would only be applicable after a heavy revision, and Goro’s drowning in anxieties. He heard it by now – knows about – not safe – but my plans – who the fuck even cares-
Ren draws in a sharp breath, but Goro is not really registering it, staring at the pale skin marred by his nails. There are red lines there, not enough to draw blood, but-
Pictures swim through his mind. Shido on the phone, too smug for his own good, instead of at the end of a barrel of a gun, pleading and apologizing like the worm he is. Goro, in the Metaverse, a new assignment. Ren, as Joker, in a puddle of his own blood and the black goo Shadows are made of, staring up at Goro with his mask half-blown off.
Goro shakes his head to try to get rid of the images. The blood is rushing away from his head and he falters backwards, almost falling. Wrong, those are wrong-
Goro? Goro, what’s wrong? He hears a by now almost familiar voice. Goro keeps shaking his head. Someone tries to hold him, help him stay upright.
Ridiculous. Why is he so upset? His revenge is what counts not- Not his soulmate, not Ren, why does he feel like bile is rising up in his throat at the thought of ki-
“-sit down?”
Goro’s stomach lurches, but the arms that grabbed him only guide him to the ground.
The fuck does it matter, he asks himself, but he keeps picturing Joker, dying, and then worse, the image is replaced with Ren, as he is, without glasses and with that healthy blush leaving his features, leaking out of his cheeks like color left Goro’s world after mother-
He presses a palm to his mouth, because suddenly, all he can remember is mother’s body, except when he thinks twice about it, it’s not her body, it’s Ren’s, and why the fuck is Goro like this, they barely met-
His free hand is grabbed, and is pressed against something warm. There is a beat, slightly erratic, but still more steadying than the heavy thumping that’s taken over Goro’s hearing. There is an even steadier rhythm, an inhale and exhale, with periodical breaks, and a gentle voice guiding him to follow in its wake.
Goro tries, if only to wash away the images and the bile he can feel in his throat.
He will not fucking vomit all over himself, he refuses to give in to anyone, not to mention his own body.
He feels so warm in his clothes, he can barely breathe, and his tie doesn’t help.
Goro claws at it with his right hand, trying to get the tight knot to loosen up, but it doesn’t work, he cannot do it, he isn’t able to do it with just one hand-
He grits his teeth, annoyance rising. Why the fuck can’t he even do this one t-
Another hand comes up to his throat, and keeps the tie still long enough for Goro to loosen it. It’s a strange feeling, only doing the familiar motion half-way, as his other hand is still held closely against the steady rhythm. Ren’s heartbeat, Goro’s mind provides, as the fog clears a bit. His eyes flutter closed and he focuses on breathing.
This close to his soulmate, he can smell what he assumes is Ren. There is a rich aroma of coffee almost imbued in his skin, and a lot of other things that Goro doesn’t care to name.
Ren never stops talking, his voice a low buzzing in the back of Goro’s mind.
He didn’t speak that much with his friends, Goro observes, memories trickling back as he feels himself settle bit by bit. Not as Joker, nor as Ren.
Deductions bring comfort and confidence. Goro’s detective position may be a ploy, but damn it if he isn’t a good one – according to himself of course.
I must be special to him, Goro concludes. Or he prefers one-on-one conversations instead of groups.
The latter deduction leaves a bad taste in his mouth.
You really are just special, Ren’s voice floats lazily into his brain, even as out loud, Ren is still humming – no longer talking then.
Not very good at multitasking, Goro notes, even as his insides warm at Ren’s words.
Oh I can multitask just fine, honey. Trust me.
Goro snorts. I’d rather test you first than just believe you outright. With a sigh, he opens his eyes. Ren’s face is close to his, watching him with his hair falling into his eyes again. Goro’s hands are on his chest, over his heart, and the other one is limp at the side, near Ren’s free hand.
Sitting in the middle of Goro’s dressing room, sunk to their knees like kids, Goro would love to believe that it’s only the two of them in this big, horrible world.
Sadly, that’s not the case.
“I don’t know what came over me,” Goro says, voice croaking. He clears his throat.
Ren’s humming halts and he frowns.
“Goro,” he says.
Goro steamrolls over him. “I suppose all of this is still hitting me quite hard.” He laughs, the sound very far from his usual camera laughs, no matter how hard he tries. He takes a few more deep breaths to steady himself. Goro cannot do this. Not to him. Cannot drag Ren into his miserable life. “I apologize, I never considered that I’d find my soulmate like-”
“Goro,” Ren interrupts. His grip on Goro’s hand momentarily tightens, but his heartbeat stays steady. “Please talk to me.”
“I am talking to you,” Goro answers idly, focusing on Ren’s fingernails. If he were to spend more time in Goro’s life, he would want Ren to take better care of them, but alas… “See, that’s when people say words with meaning behind them to each other in order to com-”
“You’re not talking to me, you’re talking at me.” Ren’s tone is harsh. Goro glances into his eyes, momentarily surprised. “I could give you more time if you really want, but I don’t think that’s what we need.”
Goro cocks his head. “Oh? What we need?” He draws his hand back from Ren’s chest, smiling with full teeth. “Clearly you are the most well-equipped to know what we need, yes, because there is no way I could ever have a say in it, not when it’s us that we’re talking about.”
“Goro, no, honey, that’s not what I meant.” Ren throws his hands up placatingly. Goro really wants to cross his own arms, but he settles for glaring. “But we’ve been going around in circles.”
Not willing to dance with me, are you, Goro thinks spitefully. Some perfect soulmate you are.
Ren looks pained, and Goro almost apologizes for the remark. I’d love to dance with you honey, verbally or otherwise, Ren holds out a hand, but Goro doesn’t take it. Ren leaves his hand up for grabbing, a sad smile dancing on his lips. But I’d appreciate knowing if my soulmate is going around causing mental breakdowns or not.
What’s it to you? Goro spits, feeling like a defiant child. As if going around and taking people’s free will is any better.
Ren’s expression hardens. That’s not what we do, as Phantom Thieves, he says, and Goro has a split second to berate himself for giving up the ruse. Not much chance of gaslighting Ren into thinking Goro knows nothing about the Metaverse after this. We just take away their distorted desires.
You mess with their emotions and their heads is what you do, Goro points out coldly. How is that supposed to inspire real change?
It didn’t start out as- Ren cuts himself off, sighing. He rakes his fingers through his already messy hair, and Goro watches enviously for a beat. He’d like to touch Ren’s hair too. He wonders what Ren does with his hair to make it so effortlessly handsome.
Probably nothing, which is infuriating, but would fit into Ren’s MO just fine.
“The first heart we changed,” Ren says quietly, but aloud, in his actual voice, “was Kamoshida’s.”
I know, Goro wants to say. He doesn’t.
(Not out loud anyway.)
Ren nods. “He hurt a lot of people – a lot of students.” He falls silent, likely thinking of someone in particular.
Why are you rehashing this to me? I was one of the first people to be assigned to the case, he thinks, frustration rising.
He doesn’t care about some nameless victim, he doesn’t even care much for Kamoshida – sure, the world is better off with that asshole not being one anymore, but this does not change the fact that the Phantom Thieves basically brainwashed him.
And that even after witnessing their ‘heist’ at Madarame’s Palace, Goro still has no idea how they did it.
“We weren’t sure if the change of heart would actually work or not.” Ren’s confession breaks through his anger. Goro blinks. “If it didn’t work, he would have had a mental shutdown.” Like in your cases, he doesn’t say.
Goro hears the unsaid words anyways. “What, so you’re saying we’re the same?” He scoffs. “Don’t make me laugh.”
“I had a personal grudge against Kamoshida,” Ren continues unbothered. His hands curl into fists. “But Ann’s grudge was even bigger. She had the final call.”
…final call about what?
Ren smiles, tilting his head. It’s not a very reassuring expression. “If she wanted him dead, or forever stuck with the horrors of his own actions.” Goro’s jaw drops. “I think she’d have been entirely justified in killing him. But she decided that death was too quick of a way out for him.” A beat of silence. “I think she was right.”
Goro has a front row seat to the darkest of smiles appearing on Ren’s face. It is almost reminiscent of Joker’s crazed grin when fighting Shadows, but Goro has only seen that from afar.
This though?
It’s thrilling, it’s full of the promise of sweet, sweet revenge, and Goro has a sinking feeling he knows why the universe decided that this boy would be his equal.
“Death is a mercy. An easy way of getting away scot-free.” Ren’s words are tumbling out like wine, taking all over Goro’s senses and making his head spin. “But when we change their hearts, when they have to own up to their mistakes and grovel for forgiveness…” Ren giggles, more than a little bit mad.
Holy fuck, Goro thinks. You’re perfect.
Ren’s eyes widen. Then he beams, soft and subdued, but radiating warmth.
He laces their fingers together. Goro lets him.
“That’s what it means, doesn’t it,” he says quietly, mischief in his tone, “being soulmates. That we are perfect for each other.”
Goro is shaking his head before he can even finish. “No, not all soulmates end up living happily.” He glances down at their hands, reeling from the past… hour? Or less? Or more? Being with Ren, time seems to dissolve and lose its meaning.
“Then we work on that,” Ren says. “Work on us.” As if it were that simple.
Goro huffs, but he feels his lips curl up. “Us,” he says, and this time, he doesn’t take offense to Ren using plural. Us, he thinks. It sounds kinda nice.
It’s been a long time since I was part of any ‘us’.
Ren brushes his thumb across Goro’s gloved hand, a frown marring his face. Goro can almost hear an unspoken question, before he says anything.
He holds up a hand. Us. If he is a part of an ‘us’, that means…
…that I don’t have to finish him off alone.
Goro smiles at Ren. “I suppose,” he starts, voice croaking. He clears his throat. “If you really mean that…”
I do. Of course I do. Ren’s expression is resolute.
“I might have judged the Phantom Thieves too harshly and too quickly,” Goro murmurs, drawing their intertwined hands to his lips. He peers at Ren from an angle. “But I happen to know of a rotten adult who has a Palace…”
Ren seems to understand immediately. He nods grimly. “Say the word and we’ll make sure they’re a changed man.” He then tilts his head with a smile. “Or…”
“Or,” Goro agrees, the same kind of ominous glint that has taken residue in Ren’s gray eyes reflecting in his own. He carelessly presses his lips against the back of Ren’s hand, reveling in the spark of electricity that travels through his body. “You don’t even know my reasons yet,” he says, words muted.
“I trust you,” Ren says. If it were anyone else, Goro would laugh in their face. Trust him of all people?
But it’s Ren. And it’s barely been a day, but Goro has a feeling both of them have already started to show off sides of themselves they would never show anyone else.
Goro’s lips twitch. Suddenly, everything is back within his reach; the revenge he’s been chasing, the childhood dream he has long given up on, and a future he barely considered he would have, just two days ago.
“Against my better judgment,” he starts, “I think I trust you too.”
Ren snickers. You think? He teases.
I do, Goro sends back. He allows himself that wobbly smile that’s been threatening to take over his features. I think you and I are going to work just fine.
Ren beams at him, and yeah, the universe was probably right to push Goro towards this boy in particular.
Feeling like he has finally reached a river after years of wandering around, lost, in a desert – Goro can’t help but be hopeful about what the future brings.
What their future will bring.