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"Wait, what?" Bela says, turning her head around to face Whitney so fast she basically gives herself whiplash.
"This is college," Leighton adds. "Any longer than four weeks and that's gonna fester." She says this with a grimace and a full-body shudder.
Four weeks, Bela thinks, trying to remember the exact date she showed up on Eric's doorstep and knowing full-well that is part of the problem.
"She's right," Kimberly says knowingly. "When Nico and I started sleeping together, I started to have feelings pretty much after two weeks."
"See? You can't be having repeated casual sex for weeks, that's like the opposite of casual."
"Yeah, but that's Kimberly," Bella protests, then, to Kimberly, "No offense, dude."
Kimberly shrugs. If there's one thing Bela admires about her is that she definitely knows who she is. "None taken."
"Anyway, why are you so interested? I thought you were happily banging your way across campus?" Whitney, of course, has no boundaries. Seriously.
"Uh," Bela stalls.
"Wait," Leighton says, narrowing her eyes at Bela. "Are you still sleeping with that editor twink?"
Bela catches herself before responding that is not how he sees himself on autopilot. "No," she lies. "That was only for like, two days, and only because we were banned from the frats thanks to your brother."
Leighton gives her a knowing look. "Pretty sure none of that is true, but I'm running late and this is already boring."
—
The thing is, Bela is not entirely sure why she lied. She's also not sure why it matters, or why it matters that it's definitely been longer than four weeks since she started sleeping with Eric. Because it shouldn't. It's casual and no one gets to judge her for her sexual choices. Also, it's casual. She could end this any second now. She totally could.
Then Eric bites down where her neck meets her shoulder, and it's not enough to leave a hickey (gross), but something about the scraping of his teeth is just so fucking good.
She totally won't end things now.
—
The thought does keep recurring. She considers going to her roommates for this, but Leighton is too busy living her best gay, slutty life (you go, girl), Whitney is too wrapped up in wanting to succeed at biochem, and Kimberly. Well, Kimberly would probably tell Bela to do a pros and cons list, which she can do on her own.
For example, pros: Eric is funny. Though it pains Bela to admit this, he also has more experience in comedy than she does, which doesn't mean he's funnier than her, but it does mean he knows how to take it to the next level. Both in comedy and sexually, somehow. She's not sure how, but that take-it-to-the-next-level skill really is transferable to their sex life. (Ugh, she can't believe there's actually a shared sex life, now that she thinks about it.)
Cons: he's Eric. He's insane and intense, and frankly, a little insensitive at times. Though he did get rid of Ryan. And he is helping Bela out with her magazine, in his own stupid way.
Pros: the orgasms are so, so good. Like, Bela has never had any issues getting horny (that is basically her baseline), but Eric, somehow, just lights her up in a way no one else has. And there have been a lot of someone elses. Bela has made sure of that.
Pros: one time, Bela was on her period, and for some reason she was low-key dreading Eric would be a dick about it (probably because he's Eric and he can be an absolute ass, see cons above). Except he totally went down on her and covered her ridiculous coffee order when they went downstairs to workshop their jokes together.
Pros: he has strong arms. Surprisingly. Like, who would've guessed someone who gets picked up by a gust of wind would be strong in any way, shape, or form? But one time, Bela was spiraling about her career and the new magazine and failure and he grabbed her flailing hands, stopping her, holding her steady, and saying, "I know you got this. And so do you."
It was both the hottest and sweetest thing, and she still masturbates thinking about how strong his grip was back then. About how—
"Earth to Bela!" Whitney interrupts. "Dude, what is wrong with you?"
"Hmm?"
"Seriously, you've been out of it for like three days. I can't remember the last time you mentioned getting dicked down, and now I'm starting to wonder if that was the first sign that we should be concerned."
At this, Bela snorts. What can she say? She's a very complex human and excellent comedian, but it's still pretty funny hearing Whitney say dicked down.
"Nah, all good, girl! Ready for that quiz? 'Cause I'm for sure gonna fail."
—
The problem is, Whitney is right. Bela can't stop thinking about it. About Eric and things that fester and about the right thing to do, because this is college, now is the time to be slutty, not to be stupid over a boy. So she decides to end it. It's really the only way. Right? Right.
—
Eric is sipping a caramel macchiato (seriously?), staring intently at his screen, when Bela says, "So, what are your thoughts on our expiration date?"
Eric looks up, frowning. "Our what?"
She shrugs, like this should be obvious, though secretly she's glad he's as confused as she was when she first started thinking about this. "You know, like, a date to end this," she says, gesturing between the two of them.
"What, like a reverse anniversary?" He's still looking confused.
"These things fester, Eric," she says impatiently. "You can't do casual sex forever. Otherwise, it festers and becomes—" she stops herself. She isn't quite sure what the result of festering is in this particular case.
"What? It becomes what?"
"Well, that's not the point. The point is, we can't do casual sex forever."
Then Eric looks at her. Really looks at her, like he's trying to figure out some complex equation. "Are you—" he starts, then looks at her again and recalibrates. "Why now? Aren't we having fun?"
Duh, yeah, she thinks. "I'm saying, it's been a while. I don't wanna have to deal with bed death, or—"
"Bed what?"
"Death, you know? Like, when—" she stops herself short of saying couples, because, somehow, that seems like a dangerous word to be using right now. "Like when people stop having sexual desire for each other. Better get out while it's still good, isn't that what people say?"
"If by people you mean politicians before their sex scandal breaks, then yeah." The what-the-fuck in Eric's sentence is heavily implied.
He's still staring stupidly at her. But then he looks away, taking a deep breath. He adjusts his glasses, not really looking at her anymore, and for the first time it occurs to her that ending things with Eric might not just mean the end of sex. It could also mean the end of this. Their afternoons workshopping each other's material. Their competition over who has the best magazine. The bickering. The hurried hellos between classes and the knowing smirks when someone is accidentally funny over all the wrong reasons. And—
"I—so," Eric starts, clearing his throat. "I mean, this, expiration date or whatever, you want us to set one?"
"I was hoping you'd have some thoughts," she says, though she can already feel this was a mistake.
Shit. This conversation is not going the way she anticipated. Actually, now she thinks about it, she doesn't think she anticipated anything. It's rapidly dawning on her she didn't even have the courage to imagine it. Double shit.
"Thoughts about ending this between us?" Eric recaps, as if either of them would've lost the thread of this conversation.
"I—yeah," she replies, but her voice is surprisingly small.
She's very close to saying this was a joke. Maybe she can trick him into thinking Indian April fool's day is a thing that is celebrated today. Yeah, that could work, right? Or she can backtrack. Wouldn't be the most embarrassing thing she's ever done. She could—
"Okay," Eric says, and his chair scrapes against the floor as he stands up. "Then let's not do this again. Since, you know, we should get out while it's still good or whatever."
Fuck. No. Wait.
"Cool," she replies, watching as he finishes throwing stuff in his backpack.
"See you around, I guess."
Bela opens her mouth to say something. Anything. Literally anything. Later, she'll honestly believe she would've said something if only he'd turned around. But he doesn't.
She watches Eric adjust the backpack on his shoulder as he walks out of the cafe, and neither of them say anything else.