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Healing

Chapter 7: Moving Forward

Summary:

The next morning, Jon wrestles with the major changes in his life and finally begins a conversation with Beth.

Notes:

Hey all, sorry it's been so long! I had a really busy week. But I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thanks again for reading and leaving all your wonderful comments :)

Chapter Text

When Jonathan woke up the next morning– at a crisp 6 AM if the pattern from the past few days was any indication– he felt surprisingly content. Breaking down in front of his parents the night before hadn’t been ideal, but it resulted in a more unified relationship than they had had in a while.

 

Clark wasn’t excited about the prospect of revealing his identity to Beth or Dave, but he had finally conceded and could see why it might be beneficial for Jonathan. They had come to an agreement to keep things vague for the time being, only telling Beth what she needed to know. But, if it became necessary to tell her everything, and would truly benefit Jon, Clark would allow it. Of course, Jon knew it would be best if he just told Beth everything right away, but revealing his secret was a pretty new thing for Clark, so Jon understood the hesitancy and decided not to argue.

 

As his eyes adjusted to the dim, early morning light seeping through the window, Jon let his mind wander a bit. Initially he had been surprised that his parents had allowed him to stay with the Miller’s. But after he explained a bit of what he was going through, finally, they seemed to understand the benefits of staying, at least a little bit longer anyway.

 

When they returned to the room, Dave and Beth were surprised to see Clark, Lois, and Jon all wiping away tears. Even more shocking was when Lois explained that they were happy to let Jon stay as long as he could have his first therapy session the next day.

 

Talk about a complete 180.

 

When the Kent’s finally left, after they both gave Jon another hug, of course, Dave and Beth had many questions.

 

Since he was still processing all the emotions from his rollercoaster of a day, Jon didn’t really want to have another discussion. So when they asked about what had prompted the change in his parents, Jon gave a vague but true answer: there was a discussion and Lois and Clark finally listened.

 

That answer wasn’t going to be satisfactory forever, especially for Beth who after spending the past week with him, knew Jon had a long road ahead and that his problems wouldn’t be fixed after one short talk.

 

Luckily, he was able to convince them to postpone the conversation until the next morning.

 

Now, several hours later, laying in his bed in the partial darkness, Jon was reminded of the same unsettling truth that he had learned earlier in the week: he was barely 6 AM and he was fully awake.

 

He also knew from experience that going back to sleep wasn’t an option either. No matter how hard he tried, once the sun started to rise, sleep would become a distant memory. So, Jon figured he should make the best of the situation.

 

Moving sluggishly, since he wasn’t even close to one hundred percent, Jon slowly sat up and got out of the bed. He wrapped the blanket around his shoulders and trudged out the door.

 

After spending the night inside, his half Kryptonian body seemed almost desperate to experience the morning rays of the slowly rising sun. Getting through the house was a bit of a trek, since he wasn’t moving that fast, but once he reached the front door and got a glimpse of the sunrise, he knew it would be worth it.

 

Back when they lived in Metropolis, Jon didn’t often get a good view of the sunrise. But sometimes, over the years when he was at various football camps, they started their days early and Jon had gotten a good view of the sunrise.

 

Even then he had been drawn to it.

 

He settled into one of the wicker chairs on the porch and realized that maybe even as a kid he had Kryptonian tendencies but hadn’t known it.

 

The thought was a bit unsettling, and a good place to start unraveling all the complicated feelings that he had been having. Several months ago he had come to terms with the fact that he was Superman’s son. It took him a bit longer to wrap his head around the idea than he led his family to believe. And realizing that Jordan shared similar powers with his father was even harder to comprehend.

 

Jordan had always been the weaker, more sensitive one that Jon had spent his whole life defending and protecting. He wasn’t upset about it. That’s just the way their relationship worked and Jon had grown accustomed to it at a very early age.

 

Which is why he really struggled when their dynamic began to change.

 

Jon was happy to see that his brother was finally more comfortable with himself and gaining confidence. Actually, considering how much time Jordan spent playing the hero in video games, it only made sense that he would be a natural fit in real life.

 

Jon wasn’t jealous.

 

Okay, maybe he had been for a while, but not anymore. Honestly the hardest thing was that Jon still didn’t know how to handle these new changes in their relationship; especially after Jordan found out he had superspeed and could fly.

 

The sun was slowly rising in the sky, displaying a gorgeous show of pinks and orange. There was still a bit of chill, they were rapidly approaching winter after all. Jon could see the wind gently blowing the blades of grass back and forth. But truthfully, he wasn’t cold. He had brought the blanket more out of comfort than necessity.

 

Just another reminder of the way things were changing.

 

Jon had struggled for a long time with the fact that he wasn’t going to have powers. Sometimes he wished he had them, and other times he was glad he didn’t. But the bottom line was simple: Jordan was the better son. Anyone could see that.

 

Jon had finally started to accept that not only was he the lesser son, he was a failure and an embarrassment too. But then, wham! All the stuff with his headaches and the kryptonite had happened. Suddenly Jon had no trouble completing complicated assignments because his memory was crazy good, he didn’t need much sleep and sitting in the sun gave him the most amazing feeling.

 

But he never got a sunburn.

 

Jon took a deep breath. Okay, now they were getting somewhere. He didn’t have powers…exactly, but based on some of the things he had noticed in the past week, Jon couldn’t qualify himself as completely normal either.

 

The nagging annoying voice in his head (that sounded like Jordan), pointed out that no matter what he felt like or hoped for, he had never been completely human, something Jon had always been able to overlook before. But now…some form of acceptance was definitely on the horizon.

 

Jon looked across the yard. The grass was covered with dew and the sparrows were just beginning their morning song. With the sun fully in the sky now and the birds literally chirping just around the corner, Jon craved to feel some form of peace. 

 

Everything around him was so normal, so human. Yet he was sitting there made up of DNA that was half human and half alien. And not just alien, but from a planet that was light years away and had been destroyed before he was even born.

 

Even though he had known that fact for over a year, it was still a lot to wrap his brain around.

 

He was a child of two worlds, plain and simple. Except, the reality was anything but plain, or simple. How could he possibly expect to fit in on this planet when–

 

“Jonathan, what on earth are you doing out here,” Beth asked. She was wearing her pink bathrobe and matching slippers. Her hair was hastily thrown in a bun and genuine concern filled her face.

 

"Just thinking."

 

“Well, why don’t you think inside where it’s warmer,” Beth said, gesturing to the house.

 

“I’m not that cold actually,” Jon said, meeting Beth’s gaze. He had wanted to get more of a handle of things before they had this conversation, but apparently that wasn’t going to happen.

 

“Are you kidding, it’s freezing out here and–oh,” mumbled Beth, realizing what Jon was hinting at. “You’re saying…that it’s not cold…for you.” Beth made sure to choose her words very carefully.

 

“Nope. It doesn’t seem to be.”

 

“Wait right here,” Beth said, before rushing inside the house. A minute later she had returned wearing a winter coat, gloves and stocking cap. “Is this okay,” she asked, gesturing to the winter clothes; she didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

 

“Sure, it’s normal to need all that stuff on a cold morning,” Jon said, trying to keep the bitterness out of his tone.

 

“Well, I’m pretty abnormal, actually,” Beth said, sensing his discomfort. She could feel herself babbling, but was desperate not to make Jon feel out of place. “Dave always says that I have the coldest hands he’s ever felt. And he’s a doctor, so he would know. It seems like no matter how hard I try to warm up, at this time of the year I’m always freezing and–”

 

“Beth,” Jon said with a smile, gently cutting her off. “You don’t have to try and make me feel better.”

 

“But I wasn’t–”

 

“Beth,” Jon said, fairly amused now. “You’ve been taking care of me nonstop for a week now. I think I know you pretty well.”

 

She sighed. Jon was one observant kid. He was also kind, sensitive and so incredibly selfless. Suddenly, her resolve strengthened. It was time to get him the help that he so desperately needed.

 

“Oh yeah, what do you know about me,” she asked, extending a challenge, hoping to ease her way into what would undoubtedly be difficult conversation.

 

Pleased to start with what he considered an easy question, Jon dived right in. “Well, when you cook, you like to make sure that everybody likes the meal because you don’t want to leave anyone out. And you absolutely love taking care of people. Whether it’s making sure Dave has work shirts pressed or like last night when you bandaged the cuts on my knees, if there’s somebody to tend to, you’re the first in line. Oh, and when you get really nervous you ramble…like a lot,” Jon said with a smirk, knowing he had nailed several of her characteristics.

 

Beth felt the blush creep up her cheeks. Well, she had known the kid was observant, and his accurate assessment of her only proved that. But would he rise to the next challenge she offered?

 

“Alright, that’s fair. What can you tell me about yourself?”

 

Jon’s smug smile faltered a bit. “What do you wanna know?”

 

“Anything you think is important.” Beth offered a kind smile, knowing that Jon might need a little encouragement to actually get the difficult part of the conversation started.

 

Jon knew he could take the easy way out and offer some random tidbits about himself, but those weren’t the details that Beth was after. “Well…I guess I’ve always been a people pleaser. Even it makes things harder for me, I guess my brain tends to lean towards what others need.”

 

“You’re a caretaker too,” Beth said, widening her smile. “Yes, I’d noticed. What else?”

 

“Jordan is the most important person in the world to me. Like I know how different we are, but we’ve always had each others backs.”

 

Beth nodded. “Okay, good, what else.”

 

Jon took a deep breath. It was now or never. “Well, with Jordan, I always knew where things stood between us, you know? Like I was more of the protector outside of the house and he kept me in check when we were at home. But now…I don’t know, our relationship has changed and it’s been hard to process I guess.”

 

“Hard to process how,” Beth asked, gently feeding him questions.

 

Jon tried to stay calm. It was just Beth. She wasn’t out to hurt him, she just wanted to help. But admitting the things that he had kept buried for so long was proving to be much more difficult.

 

“It’s okay, Jon, relax. Just take your time, okay.”

 

He nodded. “Right. I guess…Jordan has gotten a lot…stronger, you might say, and found more of who he was meant to be and I kind of feel…left behind.”

 

Beth frowned. Realizing that they were probably delving into alien territory, literally, Beth reminded herself to stay calm and be particularly sensitive with her questions.

 

“So Jordan is becoming more of his…true self we might say. And that’s difficult for you…because you… aren’t. Did I get that right?”

 

“Basically,” Jon confirmed.

 

“And so the things that are happening with Jordan make you feel…”

 

“Like I don’t matter,” Jon exploded. “I just get headaches. He’s the good son that does important things and has freaking super powers. ”

 

“Jordan has powers,” Beth asked softly.

 

Crap. Jon hadn’t meant to just blurt that out. Part of him wanted to deny it, but deep down, Jon knew Beth was too smart to believe a comment like that wasn’t true. “Yeah, he does,” Jon admitted with a sigh.

 

“And you don’t?”

 

Jon was silent. Well, technically she was right, he didn’t have powers, not in the same way Jordan did, but there was definitely something going on, that much had become obvious in the past week. Hell, there was evidence right in front of him. Beth was all bundled up in her winter coat and Jon was covered up in a thin blanket; one he probably didn’t even need. That kind of behavior wasn’t exactly normal. But superpowers…

 

“Jon? Are you saying you don’t?”

 

“I…didn’t,” he said quietly. Jon looked over at Beth, utter fear in his eyes. Sure, she had suspicions, but finally admitting things to her was a big step.

 

Beth worked hard to keep her expression neutral, knowing the boy needed her to be steady. “So…you do now then?”

 

“I don’t think so. I mean it’s not exactly powers. Things are just…different I guess.”

 

“Different like the way you aren’t cold right now or the way you don’t get sunburned?”

 

Jon nodded, grateful that she was saying the words, not him.

 

“Okay, so these things that are…different,” Beth said carefully, opting to use the same wording that Jon did, “have your parents been helping you with them?”

 

A guilty expression crossed Jon’s face. “They don’t know.”

 

Beth looked confused. “Wait, so do they know about Jordan?”

 

“Oh yeah,” Jon replied with a scoff. They know all about what my brother can do.”

 

“Then why…”

 

“Because the things that are…different with me,” Jon said, still unable to fully admit what had happened, “I think they just started and I haven’t found a way to tell them yet.”

 

Beth nodded, starting to get a handle on Jon’s line of thinking. “But they are accepting of Jordan. If you told them, wouldn’t they accept you too?”

 

“I just…I mean…this wasn’t supposed to happen for me, okay. I always thought I would be the hu…the hu…”

 

“The human one,” Beth finished softly. Jon nodded, clearly fighting back tears. “Okay, Jon I have to ask you a couple of difficult questions now, but please remember that I am only trying to help. I will never hurt you.” Jon nodded again, giving Beth permission to ask the next question. “The things that make you and Jordan different, can you tell me how that happened?”

 

“We were born this way, we just didn’t know it for a while.”

 

Beth furrowed her brows. Clearly that was not the answer she expected. “So…does anyone know why you were born this way.”

 

Jon scoffed. “Oh yeah. They always knew exactly why.” Jon turned and looked Beth straight in the eyes. “It’s because of my dad, Clark. Everything different about us is genetically passed down from him.”

 

Beth paused to collect her thoughts. Okay, so there went one theory. For a while she thought maybe Jon was adopted. But if certain traits were genetically passed down from Clark, adoption was out of the question.

 

“So your dad…he wasn’t born here, was he.” Beth had come up with another theory. It had seemed crazy before, but the longer Jon talked, the more sense it made. So, she just went for it.

 

“No,” Jon admitted. “He wasn’t born anywhere on earth. He…” Beth nodded, giving Jon the support he needed to finish the sentence. “He was born on Krypton.”

 

“So when the kryptonite in your body was acting like a poison it’s because…”

 

“It’s poison for him too, yeah.”

 

“Wow,” Beth said, running a hand through her hair. “I have to be honest, I didn’t realize there were other Kryptonians on earth. So does your dad know Superman?”

 

Jon’s breath caught in his throat. He had an easy way out. Beth didn’t suspect who his dad really was. He could just go along with it and she would never know. That’s what his parents had encouraged him to do. But suddenly, Jon realized he didn’t want to tell another lie. This was Beth for crying out loud. She was the one that put everything together in the first place. Why should he lie to her? Clark got to tell Lana the big secret, Jordan got to tell Sarah. Why shouldn’t he get to talk about it with someone outside the family? Jon knew his parents wouldn’t be happy and claim that it wasn’t really necessary, but at that moment, Jon really didn’t care. He sat up, and with a determined look on his face, turned back towards Beth.


“My dad is Superman.”