Work Text:
It’s been roughly three days since Matt got a call from Claire informing him that even if they’re other superheroes he does not have the right to give her address to random men who fall into her apartment through her window at three in the morning, so he assumes Clint’s okay.
(She spent a good hour informing him of this and now he knows how very, very wrong he was. So very wrong)
Matt thinks it’s safe to assume that he won’t ever meet Clint again. Part of him is a little sad on that front. Clint seemed like a decent guy, and he enjoyed meeting him.
Most of him wonders what his life would be like with a crazy smartass Avenger in it who likes to call him “Lucy” and has a proprietary sense over all the dumpsters in New York City, and thinks it’s probably for the best.
Which is why when, as he’s walking into the building and Foggy accosts him hissing “dude, there’s a fucking Avenger in our office,” Matt’s entire body almost vibrates with “oh no”.
Matt hears his voice three floors down when they’re in the elevator and resists the urge to bang his head into the wall multiple times.
Sure enough, when they get there, Clint Barton is leaning against Karen’s desk, chatting with her cheerfully. Karen walks out from behind her desk and up to him.
“Matt, we’ve got a client.”
“Do we,” Matt says flatly.
“Clint, this is Matthew Murdock. You’ve already met Foggy Nelson. Matt, this is… Clint Barton.” The pause indicates her excitement.
“What are you doing here?” Matt asks.
“Matt,” Foggy hisses, clearly envisioning all the money an Avenger must have to pay them to take on a case.
Clint gives a little wave. “Heya, Lucy.”
Smug bastard.
“Lucy?”
“We’re friends,” Clint says brightly.
“You’re friends with an Avenger?” Karen asks.
“You have other friends?” Foggy asks.
“No,” Matt answers tersely. “And no.”
“Aw, come on, we’re totally friends!”
“I knew you didn’t have anybody else but us.”
“That’s a sad life, bro,” Clint says. Matt grinds his teeth.
“How did you find me?”
“It was surprisingly not as hard as you’d think.”
“Wait.” Foggy frowns. “How do you know Matt?”
Clint shrugs. “Work friend.”
“He works with just us,” Karen points out. “I’d notice if you were here.”
“Of course you would. I’m very striking.”
“I doubt that.”
“Lucy’s just jealous because I’m more handsome than he is.”
“You’re not,” Foggy says loyally. “He’s not,” he adds to Matt.
“I know.”
“Wow. I can’t believe I’m being insulted by a guy named Foggy.”
Matt feels Foggy shift next to him. It’s the kind of shifting that Matt has labeled as the “indignant Foggy shuffle”. “Hey, I’m not taking crap from a guy who runs around the city shooting a weapon that became outdated hundreds of years ago.”
“Fuck you, you think you can do a better job, you can grab a bow and try to defend the city. Not my bow, though. Milli is mine.”
“Oh my God,” Karen says suddenly. Everyone turns to her. “You’re a work work friend, aren’t you?”
“Sorry?”
“You know…” Karen sticks her fingers above her head like they were horns and wiggles them. “Work work friend.”
“Horns don’t wiggle,” Matt says crankily. Karen pulls her fingers down and folds her arms.
“How do you know? You’ve never seen them.”
“Dude’s Catholic,” Foggy points out. “If anyone’s gonna know if the Devil’s horns do the tarantella it’s Matt.”
“That’s not the point,” Matt snaps. He turns to Clint. “How did you find me?”
“Wasn’t hard.” Clint shoves his hands in his pockets. “I started looking for a lawyer in Hell’s Kitchen-“
“How did you know I was a lawyer?”
“I was a spy before all of this. I know what I’m doing. Anyway, I started looking for lawyers in Hell’s Kitchen that looked like the bottom half of your face and found you.”
Matt glares at him. He doesn’t think Clint can see it behind his glasses but he’s pretty sure he gets the gist.
“Seriously, what’s the problem here?”
“Because.” Matt resists the urge to flail his arms. “People don’t know who I am.”
“True,” Clint agrees. “I mean, I know, but I’m not people. I’m awesome.”
Matt grits his teeth. “If people find out who I am,” he says pointedly. “That puts my friends in danger. Foggy and Karen could be hurt if people know who Daredevil is.”
Clint has the audacity to snort. Matt thinks about punching him.
“Lucy, I am a trained spy. I have been working for years to figure out who people are. These guys are fine. Trust me, if I thought there was a chance that anyone could tail me or guess who you are I’d go straight to your apartment and leave your place of work alone. I’m not an idiot.”
“Debatable,” Matt mutters.
“Wounded.”
Matt thinks about it for a moment. “You’re still a jackass,” he says abruptly. Clint’s posture shifts and his voice makes his grin clear.
“You’re goddamn right. I am the biggest jackass ever. I have an award.”
“Are all superheroes crazy?” Foggy asks Matt, who shrugs.
“I’ve only met the one.”
“So.” Clint rubs his hands together. “When I said ‘case’ I meant ‘taking out my new buddies to lunch’. My treat. I have this Avengers credit card that I’m pretty sure doesn’t actually have a limit. Which means we need to go out and get as much food as possible. What are your feelings on burgers?”
“Dubious.”
“He’s lying,” Foggy informs Clint. “He held the record at school for most burgers eaten in a single hour. Everyone was very impressed.”
“I haven’t heard that story,” Karen says, clearly intrigued. “Did he get an award?”
“Like six beers. And you can imagine how well those sat on a stomach chock full of dead cows.”
“I need new friends,” Matt mutters.
“You’ve got one!” Clint says cheerily. “We’re gonna be best buddies, Lucy.”
“Do you have to call me Lucy now that you know my name?”
“Yup. It’s encoded in my DNA or something. Don’t worry; I won’t do it in public. You’ll just be old Matty old buddy old pal old Matterino.”
“I don’t find any of those acceptable.”
“Too bad! I think they’ve stuck.”
“This is going to be a beautiful friendship,” Foggy says solemnly.
Karen’s looking at Matt. “You sure you want to go out?” she asks casually. Matt knows she means do you actually want to do this cause if you don’t I’ll intervene and he feels a rush of affection for her. He thinks about it, listens to Clint and Foggy bantering back and forth about “you totally misquoted Casablanca, dude” “hey, fuck off; it’s the message that’s important”.
Okay.
Maybe it could be worse.
“Yeah,” Matt says. “I could use the fresh air.”
“Okay.” He can hear the smile in Karen’s voice and he smiles a little too.
“Hey, the Batman smiles! Look at that. How often does that happen, Nelson?”
“Not often.”
“You guys do realize that it’s closer to breakfast than lunch, right?” Karen points out.
“Who cares! There must be someone in the city that will serve us burgers.”
“I’d rather have breakfast,” Matt says and Karen nods.
“You run around Hell’s Kitchen in devil horns, Lucy, you don’t get a say.” Clint holds a hand out exaggeratedly. “May I take your arm, my good sir."
"Sure."
"Delightful!" Clint joins his arm with Matt's. "Come on ol’ Matty ol’ buddy ol’ pal. Let’s paint the town red.”
“I see everything in red.”
“Buzzkill.”
“Hey,” Foggy objects, pointing at Matt (reluctantly) and Clint’s (enthusiastically) linked arms. “My job.”
“You’ve been usurped. Murdock, run with me to get away from him. Page, you distract.”