Chapter Text
"You have a chance. Get out of here and run. Steve and Bucky got away successfully.”
"...Me? What about the rest of you?" Wanda still felt like her ears were ringing from earlier, she had chased Vis away, saying he should go check on Rhodey, and he was upset with her but finally listened. "Not without everyone." I won't leave the team.
Hawkeye shook his head no firmly. "Look. They already have Scott and Sam. You need to get out of here." He yanked her by the arm behind one of the smashed cars littering the tarmac. "Listen to me. I don't know what's going to happen to us, but I also know the rest of us do not have their power when not suited up. So, they're not going to do much to us. You can't disarm yourself, so you are in danger. Get out of here and run, kid."
Meaning I am the only threat left; then. In a second, Wanda pulled herself away with a whispered, "I'm sorry, I can't do that," and strode back into the open. She did not see Scott, though she thought she could sense his presence-there! in the truck-and Sam was being pushed into the armored truck next to the one she thought Scott was in. Snap, red psionic energy yanked the wheels off the two trucks with a horrible crunching metallic noise, and they crashed to the pavement. Scott's head popped out of one truck looking puzzled and pleased, and he tried to jump out but was promptly shoved back in. Sam was staring at her and shaking his head subtly, and then nodding to the left, as if he were trying to warn her of something. There, a dozen guns flew to the ground, away from the men aiming them at her. Next the two still holding Sam, she carefully pulled into the air via telekinesis and set down a good distance away. I can't hurt any more people. I can't. Why was Sam just standing there? He needed to get down and run too.
"Wanda, it's over, don't make it worse," Sam was saying now, shaking his head again. "Look up. Let's live to fight another day."
Wanda glanced up at the sky; there were helicopters overhead now, too many for her to force down and crash even if she wanted to. If they were empty, she would certainly try, since then it wouldn't matter if she failed, but she couldn't bring herself to do so knowing there were certainly pilots and more gun-toting strike team men inside. Those victims at Lagos were too much already. She spun around, looking for Clint. He was talking very intently to two more of the men, hands cuffed now, but he was also signing something calmly, over and over. Wanda didn't know much sign language besides the letters, but these were just simple letters. R-U-N. R-U-N. Clearly he was hoping she would still just bolt regardless of the fate of the others. What now? She still did not want to leave them, and besides, even if she did run on her own, if she wanted to actually get away successfully, she'd have to hurt or kill people. She would not. Absolutely not, not again.
"MAXIMOFF, STAND DOWN. You are under arrest for violation of the Sokovia Accords." A loud voice came from overhead within one of the helicopters. Wanda looked up again and finally ran, bolting toward the hangar. Maybe she could somehow bring the aircraft down without crashing them while hiding inside there, and then...get her team members free? Maybe? I can't. I'm not strong enough, I- Something burned on her left leg and she spun around again, trying to decide what to do next, considering she was both exhausted and unwilling to harm these people. A red shield crackled around her defensively, and she could hear Clint yelling something. He sounded absolutely pissed, but she couldn't understand what he was saying. I cannot get all of us out of here, definitely not now. Wanda let the shield dissipate and slowly put her hands up to surrender.
"Stand down. We have permission to use lethal force if necessary. Surrender peacefully and stand down. Stand down immediately."
Wanda squeezed her hands into fists and let herself drop to her knees, knowing her hands probably still had wisps of scarlet haze swirling around them, because she was angry and frightened and the magic wanted her to do something even though she was exhausted at this point. And her leg hurt; she thought a bullet had probably grazed her. "I am," she hissed at no one.
Let's live to fight another day. You can't disarm yourself, so you are in danger. Sam's and Clint's words thundered in her head. Wanda felt something shove her flat on the ground, her cheek scraping hard against the rough tarmac, and it hurt. Clint was yelling something again, sounding even more angry than before. His voice sounded like it was growing fainter and farther away. "I'm not doing anything," she said finally, "is this really necessary?"
"Shut up. You're lucky we don't kill you on the spot. You're a weapon of mass destruction."
I didn't mean to kill those people in Lagos. At that moment, Wanda knew exactly why Clint had tried to make her leave alone, even if it meant abandoning the others. He thought they were going to kill her, or at best, were not going to treat her the same as the rest, and he was right. Sam was unhurt, as was Clint, and Scott had been fine, at least before being shoved back inside that truck, anyways. And now it was too late, unless she was willing to hurt more people in order to free herself. I won't do that. Stop it. I have to calm down. Panicking will not help. I will cooperate, I will play nice, and Cap will come get us once his friend is safely hidden. Stay quiet. I survived Hydra, whatever is here cannot be worse. So calm down. Something sharp poked her neck, and she felt herself growing drowsy. I don't want to fall asleep! No no no, I can't. She had a brief glimpse of Tony in the distance, and he did appear genuinely upset, but the fact that he was just standing there doing nothing to stop what was happening made her want to scream. It wasn't like she expected him to say not to arrest her, but it would be nice for him to maybe...make the rough handling stop, anyways. If he did interfere he would put himself in danger of being arrested too most likely, I know that. Forget him, she thought.
More red wisps came to her fingers unbidden, and now there was more shouting, someone shouting that she had better stop or else. Pull it back, she ordered herself mentally, you can stay awake without using your powers, you have to. Then she was stumbling somewhere, too many unfamiliar hands grabbing on her and making her move. Wanda hoped they would just chuck her in wherever they had put Hawkeye, because at least he would talk to her and calm her down. Everything was spinning unpleasantly and she was confused, frightened, and somewhere inside, stewing mad. This was not fair. Not fair one bit.
Every time she tried to do something right, it backfired. Every single time. They should leave her be before she exploded, shouldn't they? Especially if they just consider me a walking nuke. Wanda was vaguely aware of something uncomfortably snug clamping around her neck, and she instinctively tried to pull herself free. "What is that, I-"
"Why isn't she knocked out yet? I don't want to deal with her."
"It doesn't matter now. She can't do anything."
Wanda felt herself shoved inside something metal and cold, and she blinked several times, struggling to wake herself up. It was not working. There was a blurry shape across from her, moving closer. "Don't...don't-" What if it was those horrible things back at Hydra, she felt the same now as she had then, drugged and confused. Something was going to hurt her and then Pietro would be mad and try to help, and it would make it worse because then he would be hurt and she would lash out and that hurt too.
"What the hell did you people do to her? You couldn't just stick her in here nicely like you did me?"
That sounded like Clint. She knew him. She was not either with Hydra, the stupid government had arrested them for violation of the Accords (and saving Bucky), and Pietro was not there, he had died a year ago. Well, if Hawkeye was there, at least she was not alone, even if she couldn't have her twin there with her. Red energy began flitting to her hands again, thinking maybe she could get out if Hawkeye helped them do so, and Wanda started to send telepathically, I'm sorry, I wasn't able t- and then the connection ripped away as something horrible sizzled through her. Electricity. I know what this-
Clint stared from Wanda to the men that had deposited her inside the helicopter and back again in horror. "She's just a kid," he said finally. "She even stood down like you asked! This is ridiculous."
"Stood down? She ripped the wheels off two armored trucks simultaneously, disarmed a dozen people, threw two in the air-"
"Throw, my ass. She picked them up gently and set them down again," Clint spat. "Not exactly throwing. What is that, leave her alone, will you!" The guard appeared to be holding some kind of remote now, and he looked far too gleeful about it in Hawkeye's mind. "Let's not shock the already unconscious kid again, shall we. She's no threat to you." He did not say that Wanda probably could've crashed the whole lot of helicopters and whatever else if she did not care about potentially killing more people. That would not help their case.
"Mouth off again and she gets another hit. She does anything out of line, she gets another. Any of her weird powers, she gets another." A pile of something blue was flung to the floor. "I don't want to deal with her, you get her ready."
Clint considered this information briefly. "Perhaps a first-aid kit would be nice," he said in a forced polite tone, "because we all know you wish to ask us questions wherever we're headed, and obviously you do not, in fact, actually want Wanda dead, or you'd have killed her already."
A small metal box containing the requested kit clanged to the floor.
"And you'll need to uncuff me, because I cannot reach her like this. Where will you be taking us?" Clint kept his voice neutral, though now ideas that maybe, just maybe, they could commandeer the helicopter and get away that way crossed his mind. Scott and Sam had been taken aboard this same helicopter after Wanda had wrecked the two armored trucks, so if he could just get to their other teammates...
"The Raft."
Clint kept his expression unreadable and said nothing when the man uncuffed him from the wall. Then the door slammed shut, leaving them alone in what appeared to be some kind of small armored transport cell area. There were slivers of light coming in from vents overhead that made it possible to see. Clint sighed; it seemed suspicious that Wanda would get deposited with him while Scott and Sam were not and had been isolated in separate ones. Someone probably thought he would make Wanda be more cooperative, because likely on her own she would promptly be scared and angry when she came to, and they did not want to deal with a scared, pissed telekinetic. Either that, Clint thought, or she's here because they're going to use her to threaten me into talking, because they assume I'd be most likely to fold if she's in danger.
Wanda stirred a bit a few minutes later, her head still feeling muddled and sleepy. She could feel whatever vehicle thing she was in moving, and instinctively she tensed and tried to sit up. I remember. I hate this, I hate it. There was a quiet voice talking to her, and she struggled to focus on that. This place was dark, and cold, and her body hurt all over, particularly her neck and her leg. She wanted out. Maybe she could just blast right through the floor, or-
"Wanda, can you hear me? Please don't try using your powers right now. You'll hurt yourself further." Hawkeye. He sounded worried. That made her worried. "I can't see very well, but I don't think there's any bullet here. Seems like a bad graze and nothing more. Sorry if I'm hurting you."
"It's fine; had worse. I want...to get out." Wanda pried her eyes open again and tried to focus on the source of the voice. There. Clint was sitting right next to her. Where are we? Is this a plane, or...no. I know that noise. Helicopter. I can't get us out of an aircraft safely.
"I know, but we can't. We knew we weren't all making it out of the airport safely. Cap'll get us out from wherever we're taken. Right now we lay low and cooperate until then, okay?" Clint paused; Wanda didn't answer and still appeared dazed even in the dim light, but she was able to sit up.
"If I can't...get myself out, let alone all...of us...how the hell is he going to alone?" Wanda still sounded a bit off, and tired, but also angry now. She buried her face in her hands and immediately winced; something felt warm and sticky and she knew her cheek was probably bleeding still. I don't know what to do. I feel like I can't think straight. "I'm sorry."
Clint dropped his voice to a whisper, just in case anyone was listening. "You probably could have gotten us out, or at least just yourself, if you didn't care about killing people. Nice to hear our resident OP glass cannon awake again. You game for commandeering this thing?"
"Won't work without my...powers," Wanda said quietly, her fingers tugging at the uncomfortable collar nervously. Even just fiddling with it like that hurt; she could feel some kind of sharp prongs digging into her already damaged skin, and if she tried to rip it apart using her own powers, she would just get knocked to the floor again before actually doing anything useful.
"They clearly think I'm going to get you to be more cooperative, so let's appear to be cooperative at least, in case someone returns. Put those ugly blue things on. I'll turn around and you tell me when you're done. Then maybe I can try getting that thing off of you."
Wanda blinked, still trying to clear her head. "...Okay." Why is he wanting to fight again now, when there's so little chance of us escaping? She still felt shaky all over, but she changed as quickly as possible and then carefully folded her battle outfit. At least the blue prisoner uniform was not scratchy. That was...something, anyway. "Done. You can turn back around now," she whispered. Then, after a moment, because she thought she knew exactly why Hawkeye wanted them to try one last time to escape, "Where are we being taken?" I think he knows and doesn't want to tell me.
Clint shook his head and began examining Wanda's shock collar in the dim light, trying to see how they might remove it. "The Raft. It's a high-security prison meant for enhanced people. Supervillains. A hellhole as far as I know. I...um...definitely can't get this thing off. It's like the hinge is made not to reopen at all once locked in place, even if we had a key or we picked the lock. I'm sorry. We would need to break it entirely." The thing had already left raw burn marks on Wanda's pale skin, and Clint had no way to fix that for her, not unless they could break it off of her, and there was nothing in the transport cell strong enough to do that...except Wanda's own powers, which she couldn't use right now because of that exact problem they needed to fix. They needed super strength or magic, either would do. "I'll try, but I don't want to choke you by yanking on it uselessly, either."
"Do it," Wanda whispered instantly. If I can't use my powers with that horrid thing on, I certainly can't tear it apart. Clint probably can't either, but he has a better chance than I do, anyway. She braced herself against the wall, biting her lip. "I don't care if it hurts, just...get it off. Please."
Clint sighed, still quite sure they were not going to be able to do so, but he nodded. "Okay, here goes..."
Predictably it did not break, and Wanda took a deep breath, rubbing her sore neck. Surely there was some other way to remove it. "Can you see any way to disable it, at least?" she asked hesitantly. Then I could rip it off myself.
Hawkeye went back to studying the device, thinking that since the thing was from Stark Industries according to the words printed on it, it was not going to be that simple to disable without a remote control, let alone remove, which clearly wasn't meant to happen once closed. This he did not tell his younger teammate, who would probably just get more angry and upset if she discovered that information. "There just isn't anything visible to pick or to undo wires or whatever else. Even if there was, I'd be worried meddling with it would just make it shock you again."
"Forget it." Wanda sank back to the floor, pulling her knees to her chest. I want to go back to the compound, before Lagos. Why couldn't I contain that bomb farther up in the air? All that power and I'm still too weak to be of any use. "Thank you for trying, at least. Even if we did get it off and then hijack the helicopter successfully, they'll just shoot it down." If she was able to shield the entire thing, that would help, but she couldn't do that indefinitely anyhow, and right now she wasn't sure she'd be able to shield something that big in the first place since she was already so tired.
The lack of answer made her certain she was correct. The Raft must be really horrible if Clint was willing to risk a long shot plan like that. It cannot be worse than Hydra, Wanda thought to herself. The painful collar was bad, the shoving on the pavement and being given some kind of drug that made her sluggish and sleepy was bad, the being shot at was bad. But she did not really think this Raft place was going to experiment on her; they would probably kill her first, and that was much much better than being experimented on. The sound of the sealed metal door to the transport cell opening startled her, and she glanced at Clint.
"Be zoned out half asleep, maybe they'll just ignore you," Clint whispered quickly.
Wanda did not particularly think this was going to help because it had never worked for her before, when she pretended to be asleep on the Hydra base. It had indeed worked on a couple of undercover missions with the Avengers before, but those times the targets hadn't had any idea what she was capable of and merely thought she was a normal ordinary girl, so it was easy peasy to gather information and know she could simply withdraw by force if she really, really had to. Here she was already viewed as a major threat that needed to be neutralized, so acting harmless most likely wouldn't help. It can't hurt to try, though...right? She moved back against the wall and leaned against it, half-closing her eyes but still peeking through her lashes.
The four men that piled in didn't even say anything right away; two immediately grabbed Clint and the other two came for her. Wanda tried to keep herself steady on her feet without looking completely awake, because she really really did not want any more of whatever drug she'd been injected with before. Her injured leg hurt, but not enough to prevent her from using it. She'd had much worse than that, anyways. I will not do anything. I will cooperate and it will be fine. If Clint is going to trust Steve to get us out, I should do the same. Wanda could see him cooperating with being cuffed back against the wall and another short signed message for her that clearly no one else was paying any attention to, because they were all preoccupied with watching her actions or lack thereof instead. I-T-S O-K.
The little message made her feel a bit better, but then she heard sudden shouting from somewhere adjoining the transport cell.
"You always get one call when you're arrested! Let me call Cassie!"
"Hey, why's Scott not been allowed to call his daughter if that's who he wants to use his one call on?" Hawkeye asked calmly. "He's not wrong."
Wanda didn't care about this phone call protocol for herself, because anyone she might have wanted to call was dead (Pietro), on the run (Steve), on the other side of the Accords debate (Nat), or arrested here with her (Clint). Well, she supposed she would like to talk to Vision, but the synthezoid did not have his own phone and if she called the Compound, then she might end up getting Tony Stark on the phone instead. I don't hate him anymore, but...I don't want to see or talk to him, either. Not one bit.
"You four aren't calling anyone."
"I want to use my call for Cassie! I'll play nice after, I promise. Let me call Cassie!"
Wanda had been keeping her 'sleepy' act up and cooperating calmly, but now something inside her snapped. At least it makes sense for them to be like this with me. Not him. That isn't fair. "Let him call Cassie," she ordered flatly. Wanda glared at the man that had made the no phone calls comment. Ross clone, she thought vehemently, some visceral thing inside her immediately jumping to utterly despising this man.
"What are you going to do now? You can't make us do a thing without your witchy powers."
"Try me and find out. Let him call Cassie." He wouldn't be so focused on me if he wasn't still scared of me, even if I can't actually do anything right now. Wanda stood her ground and continued staring at him, her green eyes flickering with anger. "I'll rip this to pieces," she went on in a deathly calm tone, her hand slowly reaching for the collar, "but if you let him call, I will cooperate and cause no trouble." She knew she was risking another shock, and Clint was staring at her in horror and shaking his head frantically, no stop this now!, but if she was lucky, they'd believe her. The two guards still holding onto her were shifting nervously now.
"You're bluffing."
"Am I?" Wanda felt something shoved onto her, something constricting that she instinctively wanted off, but instead of fighting that, she continued staring intently at the man seemingly in charge of the four, as if she might be about to poke into his head and force him to do what she wanted, even though she knew she couldn't actually do so right now. I am bluffing, but he doesn't know that. Let him think whatever he likes as long as it makes him give Scott that phone call.
"Fine, fine. The bug guy gets his phone call."
He's lying to make me shut up. "...And I want proof, or deal's off."
"Hey, why haven't you just fried her yet?"
Wanda tensed and let her eyes flick to Clint briefly, who appeared resigned and frustrated now, but then she stared back at the man seemingly in charge of the four again. He's going to do that to me anyway, so it doesn't matter. Stick with your plan. "Let. Him. Call. Cassie." In a second, the expected white-hot pain ripped through her again, and she collapsed. Please let it be worth it. I'm sorry, Clint, I had to at least try. That was not fair.
Wanda felt herself being strapped to the wall somehow, and there were voices talking about the phone call thing. Scott was still shouting about it from somewhere nearby, and there was another person yelling that he had better shut up or there wouldn't be any phone call. Did it work? I don't know, I-
"You've just made your life very unpleasant." The man she had threatened roughly grabbed her drooping head by the chin and made her look at him again.
"It...already...was." Wanda was not at all sorry for what she had done; if they were already going to hate her and mistreat her even when she did try to cooperate or do the right thing, then she would use their fear to-hopefully-get something she wanted if she had to, at least.
"Hey, you restrained her, now leave her alone already," Clint said tiredly.
Wanda felt a new bloom of pain spread across her scraped cheek as the man slapped her, but she squeezed her eyes shut and refused to cry. Clearly this man liked hurting her and she did not want to give him any reaction whatsoever if she could help it.
There were thumping feet as the four men exited their transport cell, and Wanda strained her ears trying to hear if Scott was, in fact, receiving his phone call. He was no longer shouting about it, anyway, which seemed like a good sign. Then she heard, "I know you can hear me! Thanks, little red witch girl!"
This made Wanda quite satisfied, even if she did not care for being called that, and she peeked over at Clint, who was scowling at her and looked pissed now. "It...worked."
"Yeah, and you just made yourself a freaking target over a phone call. A phone call," Clint muttered. "Not getting a phone call is the least of our problems. Just lie low and pretend to cooperate. You can silently seethe and hate this and still pretend."
I know, but it was not fair, and the rest of you shouldn't even be taken to this Raft place anyway, regardless of what any of us did or didn't do. You're technically not enhanced in the first place. Wanda was quiet for a few minutes, but then she whispered, "I was already a target. So it does not matter. They already planned to put me in a shock collar and straitjacket anyway no matter what I did, why else would they have those items in the first place? At least this way I...got something out of cooperating," she spat the last word. And I definitely made Scott Lang happy. Wanda closed her eyes in exhaustion and let her head droop again. This is only the beginning and I'm already tired and hurt. Tired, tired, tired.
"I understand exactly why you did it, and I didn't say you were wrong to do so. Doesn't make me like it. Wanda, look at me for a second, please." Clint waited for her to look up at him and began signing letters again, shifting his cuffed hands as close to the dim light coming from overhead as possible.
Y-O-U T-H-I-N-K Y-O-U D-E-S-E-R-V-E T-H-I-S. W-R-O-N-G.
Wanda visibly deflated the second she had deciphered the message, her entire body slumping as much as she could being fastened against the wall. I don't know. Not...this, exactly, I suppose, but I know I messed up. I killed innocent people in Lagos, not on purpose, but I did. And I know the Accords couldn't have been made up on the spot only because of my mistake, but it still feels like it. I broke the team in half. "If the Raft is supposed to be specifically for enhanced people, the rest of you shouldn't be here at all in the first place," she said finally, which didn't exactly answer the question, but Wanda did not want to express her actual fears or explain that yes, her entire stunt about the phone call had been all an act and she felt helpless right now. She knew Clint already knew that she'd been acting anyways, because if she thought she could snap that collar off, she would have done it when they'd been considering commandeering the helicopter. "No matter what any of us did or did not do. It is not fair. I can at least understand sending me there, because I'm the uncontrollable weapon of mass destruction." And I know it's why you told me to run back in the airport, too.
"Don't call yourself that. You did your best and fell short, same as Steve, same as the rest of us have," Clint said firmly. "If you hadn't interfered, there would have been even more victims and property damage, on top of killing you and Steve. Maybe you could have thrown it farther out, away from the building rather than straight up, but even then it would've rained who knows what down into the crowd once it exploded. There was no good option."
"Well, my best was not good enough. I should have been strong enough to contain it, and I failed." Again. Besides feeling horribly guilty for those poor people that had lost their family in an explosion, just like she'd lost her parents, Wanda was also simply angry with herself that she hadn't been able to stop it. What was the point of all her powers that scared her and everyone else if she still wasn't strong enough to protect everyone else with them, at least? I tried to do the right thing and I ended up here.
"Think for two seconds what you just said. You're upset with yourself because you weren't strong enough to, what...contain a bomb? Something no one else there could even attempt to do? You're one person. You cannot blame yourself for hitting a power limit." Clint didn't like the expression on Wanda's face; she looked like all the fight had simply drained out of her.
"I don't feel like it is a limit," Wanda said, her voice shaking a little. "It felt like it in the moment, of course, but...there's this little feeling inside that I can do more. I don't know, but..." She trailed off, feeling her magic stirring about inside nervously. I don't think I know what exactly I'm capable of. And neither does anyone else.
Hawkeye shook his hard and signed, Q-U-I-E-T. "Wanda, even if that was true, you can't now, so it means you'd simply need more experience, yes?" Once he knew she was watching his fingers closely again, he added, D-O-N-T S-A-Y M-O-R-E, and nodded toward the ceiling and exit. Someone is probably listening and could use anything like that against us later.
Wanda nodded, understanding the meaning perfectly; she needed to be quiet because what she had just said made her look all the more guilty and that would make things worse if she was questioned about it later. Anything she said right now could be used against her later if anyone was listening. I want to sign back. There are no cameras in here, so that is safe, and I can't. Wanda shifted uncomfortably against the wall a bit, wishing she could at least move, even if she couldn't use her magic right now anyway. Already her fingers were starting to feel numb, pinned to her sides, and that was starting to make her anxious and jumpy too.
"You okay, kid?"
No, but I'm glad not to be stuck here alone. "Must you still call me a kid? I'm a grown adult, thank you very much," Wanda replied, though she really did not mind him calling her that. Someone else, definitely, but Hawkeye felt like a surrogate father to her and so it was okay.
"You're still a kid to me. Steve too." Clint was glad to hear the slightly sulky tone, because that was normal Wanda behavior and seeing normal behavior from her was good, especially right now.
"He has an excuse. He's old." Wanda's eyes looked a bit brighter, because this reminded her that she was not either alone; she did not have to deal with this new awful thing happening on her own, even if her missing twin wasn't here with her.
Hawkeye actually laughed at that comment. "Okay, I suppose you're fine, if you're making jokes." Wanda was clearly not fine, sure, but she wouldn't be until their group was able to break out, so for now he would take keeping her spirits up enough to make jokes as a win.
Wanda didn't laugh, but she smiled a tiny bit.
Some indeterminable amount of time later, after quite a lot of finger spelling messages from Clint and Wanda nodding yes or no, Wanda felt she had answers to at least most questions they thought might be asked. And if it's something I don't want to answer, make something up, something easy to remember in case it's asked again, she reminded herself. When it's harmless, tell the truth. Read the room, don't let pride prevent you from keeping yourself safe if possible.
"Feels like we're landing finally," Clint said now. "Hey, remember, pretend it's just an important undercover mission gone wrong. Comms went out and you can't use your powers without revealing everyone. You're just waiting to get pulled out, okay?"
Wanda nodded. That actually...did help. It was also a bit darkly humorous, because the times she had gone on an undercover mission that involved putting herself in a potentially dangerous hostage or prisoner situation, everyone else had gone on and on about how if she felt like it was too much, no one was going to judge her or be angry or disappointed if she pulled herself out. "I love how the times I was really on a mission, all of you, especially Nat, made me promise to pull out, period, even if it meant botching the mission and revealing myself," she said quietly.
"Well, you reached the big leagues now. It'll be okay. Or, well...it will be. Eventually."
Wanda absolutely did not think it was going to be okay, nor did she think Clint really believed it either, but she just said, "Okay," and nothing more. A distinctive beeping sound made her tense, and she glanced around in search of the source before realizing it was on her. "It's going t-to go off ag-" she started to say, and then the awful current bombarded her once again. Stop it stop it stop it! I didn't even do anything, Wanda thought to herself. This time a single tear ran down her cheek, and she forced herself to stop that as the transport compartment opened again. If Clint saw her cry, then fine, but not these Raft people, absolutely not.
"Retreat somewhere else, somewhere that makes you happy," Clint told her. Then, to the guards that had piled in, "What the hell was that for? She's not doing anything at all!"
"Boss said not to take any chances, not after earlier," one said, not appearing to care much one way or the other. He even shrugged. "Out, Barton. I'm just doing my job here."
Wanda was still recovering from the shock when she felt another jab in her neck again. Not again. Not again. I don't want to feel all drugged and sluggish anymore. Again there were too many hands grabbing on her, again she felt disoriented and dazed, and she closed her eyes. Okay. Say nothing. They will have to put me in a cell here, and then I can pretend the effects last longer than they really do. Then maybe I won't get any more. Clint had specifically told her not to let pride prevent her from keeping herself safer if at all possible. That counted, didn't it?
There was a faraway sense of being yanked out of the transport cell and out of the helicopter entirely. It didn't seem like these two guards were being malicious like that one earlier had been; they simply did not care. She could have been a cardboard box they were moving and they would drag that around the exact same way. Rain pattered down, and Wanda heard an annoyed, "Ugh, rain again. Let's just get them inside. Thirty minutes til break time." A door slid open like a hatch and Wanda felt herself unceremoniously shoved into it, landing awkwardly on her side with a quiet yelp since she couldn't reach out to catch herself. She simply lay there quietly, not particularly caring at this point. If they wanted to make her move, then they could just drag her, because she was too tired and achy to move. Then she thought, absolutely not, she was not going to let that happen if she had any strength left at all.
"You got both of us phone calls, so thank you," a familiar voice whispered in her ear and pulled her so she was sitting leaning against the interior of whatever thing they had been pushed into, "whatever you did made Ross worried and he didn't want to risk you making another-" The voice cut off abruptly at a 'no talking' order.
Sam. Wanda did not know where he had come from or how, but my goodness, that was interesting information. So Ross knew about the phone call incident aboard the helicopter already, and he had been worried enough that not only had Scott gotten his phone call immediately, Sam got one too, because he was worried about something Wanda hadn't even done yet! Wanda was quite pleased with herself. Maybe she could also get Clint one too, then...but she didn't think so, because if that was the case, he would have gotten one already. He's being punished because he's the one most closely associated with me. I know that much. Wanda thought they must have been shoved in some kind of elevator, because she could feel whatever they were in going down.
Bright artificial lights assaulted her senses when another door slid open a minute later, and she blinked, trying to clear her vision a bit. She felt someone trying to pull her to her feet and flinched on instinct. It's just Clint and Scott. I need to calm down. I should have known, because they're not yanking me around like a sack of potatoes.
"Don't know why they'd dump us all together, but I'll take it," Scott said. "Good gosh, are you okay? You look terrible."
Wanda bit back a smile. "Hey, I got...you a...phone call," she murmured slowly.
"Maybe you shouldn't have if it meant they'd smack you around for it."
"My choice." I think it would've happened anyway, even if I did absolutely nothing.
"Dumped together to see him," Clint put in, nodding toward a satisfied-looking Ross dressed in a suit and tie.
"I believe I said no talking."
"Okay, wait a second here sir, you can put that remote thing away, they'll be quiet," Sam said quickly, stepping in front of his three teammates, as if playing shield would protect Wanda from being shocked again. "Right, people?"
Three heads nodded behind him. Wanda felt something loosening the straps on the straitjacket behind her, enough to make it much easier to breathe and that she might be able to wiggle a hand free if she really really tried and had time to do so. She glanced at Scott, immediately assuming he was the culprit, but he didn't even react and looked entirely innocent. Clint was scowling at him, which seemed like confirmation enough. It was nice he was trying to help her, but she was very sure if she did successfully wiggle free entirely, anyone else would just assume she had done it herself and she'd end up in more trouble. Worth it if I get us something else like the phone calls, but not for literally nothing.
It turned out Ross led them to another room with a metal table and chairs in it, all of which appeared capable of cuffing a person to them, and there were papers Ross wanted them to sign, papers that meant they acknowledged being guilty of a whole plethora of different things, and seemed to sign away any legal human rights. Wanda didn't think she would understand all the English legal jargon even if her head didn't feel all muddled-she might be fluent in the language but not to that extent-but the fact that none of the others were willing to sign either was enough confirmation to her that neither should she.
"Signing this doesn't just sentence us to life in your underwater pokey, it says we're guilty of things we didn't even do and kind of implies that we give you the right to do whatever you want with us as long as we're here, so, no," Scott said matter-of-factly. "Your men hurt Wanda for no reason already and shoved me around too, just clearly not as much. Barton and Wilson are only fine because they didn't make any kind of fuss. We're not going to license doing that to us. Who knows what else could happen if we signed that?"
"Sign it."
Wanda knew exactly what was happening the second she saw the remote in Ross's hand. Go somewhere else. Go somewhere else, she told herself desperately, but there was nowhere to run, and she found herself on the floor convulsing as the electricity tore through her yet again. Someone hauled her back into her chair and must have noticed the looser straps on the straitjacket, because it pulled tight again and pinched, pressing painfully against a bruise on her back. The same person fastened her to the chair so she couldn't fall out of it again, and Wanda wanted to scream. I will not. I won't give them the satisfaction. A few tears slipped unbidden down her cheeks before she could hold them back. "Don't sign," she hissed finally.
Scott was staring at her in horror now and blurting apologies over and over. "Don't apologize," Wanda ordered, "it's his fault." Green eyes still bright with tears blazed fire at Ross. No magic. No glowing eyes. No no no, I can't. I can be angry, but no magic.
Whatever Ross saw in Wanda's angry gaze appeared to at least mildly concern him, because he flinched. "Well, surely we can come to an agreement here. You don't want your dangerous friend harmed, you sign. I'll even give you ten minutes to discuss." The man even got up and left the room, leaving them alone with just the four guards.
The four ex-Avengers traded glances. "I'd sign if all it said was that we were guilty of violating the Accords," Sam said first. "That's technically true and wouldn't make us 'admit' or agree to these other things."
"Don't sign, no matter what," Wanda put in adamantly. Absolutely not. "If you fold on something now just...because of me..."
Clint glanced at her for a moment and sighed. "She's not wrong," he said quietly. "We do this now, right upon first getting here, they'll continue using her safety to threaten all of us."
"That man will kill her, Barton," Scott muttered. "Look, it's only been hours, and she's already like that. I'd hope someone would sign it for Cassie's sake if she was stuck here."
Wanda gave him a questioning look, even as she felt herself growing more and more tired. This did not feel exactly the same as earlier though, so she thought she must not have been given as much of whatever the drug was. Clearly she was not supposed to be knocked out, just tired, probably because of this signing thing. Mission. It's an undercover mission and I am fine. And I have three other people here trying to help me. "I'll live. I am not signing that, so there...isn't any reason for you to do so, just to help me." Scott making that comment about Cassie made Wanda feel all warm and fuzzy inside. He didn't even know her much at all; he didn't owe her anything. But he cared anyways. "Do what's best for Cassie, not me."
Clint was staring at the papers now, feeling more and more pissed. Ross is probably just wanting our reaction for future reference. There is no way he actually cares about us signing this. "This place is pretty off the grid. You come in, you don't normally leave. Ever. I don't think Ross actually needs us to sign this in order to do whatever he pleases with us."
"Meaning he can just torture or interrogate any of us without getting in trouble for it? Surely there are security cams," Scott said hopefully.
Sam sighed deeply. "Of course there would be, but there are always blind spots. Or rooms purposely set up without them, like this one. This is not like whatever prisons you've been in before, Lang. Look around you. There's shit in this room for...questioning people, shall we say."
"There's no upside t-to signing that," Wanda said, hating the way her own voice was shaking a bit. "You know even if we do, he will just...find some other reason to...you know." Calm down, she ordered herself mentally, calm down and stop letting this scare you. Stop it.
"So...we don't sign?" Scott.
"No. We offer Sam's idea and that's it."
They sat in silence until Ross returned, and even then, Sam only said, "Our answer is no. However, we have a counteroffer."
"And?" Ross sat and adjusted his tie. Scott rolled his eyes, Clint stared at him, and Wanda kept her eyes glued down to the table, not trusting herself to say anything right now.
"We'll sign something acknowledging being guilty of violating the Sokovian Accords," Sam told him.
Scott nodded. "That. And nothing more."
"That's it, and certainly nothing that involves turning on a particular member of the team to get privileges while here. You're just targeting someone due to personal dislike." Clint's voice sounded angry now, and while Wanda still didn't look up, she was quite sure that particular member of the team was her. Of course it was; otherwise the comment didn't make any sense.
"You're very quiet over there. Anything to add?"
Wanda thought if she didn't hate Ross before, she definitely hated him now, absolutely hated him. That stupid smug voice, the picking and poking and judging and that condescending expression always on his face made her skin crawl. If he was around whenever Steve came to get them out, she would...do something to him. Maybe a nice dunk in the Atlantic or putting the horrible shock collar on him would do nicely. She gave him a fleeting glance, as if he were not even worth her attention at all, and just said, "No," in the most nonchalant voice she could muster. I have nothing to say to that man. Nothing I do or don't do will change his opinion of me.
"I'd think you'd be the first to sign if you really felt guilty about what happened in Lagos."
Wanda's eyes glowed red briefly, sending a mild shock through her and reflecting her roiling thoughts inside, but she clamped her mouth shut and said nothing. Do not tell me what I do or don't feel. You don't know me. That was my fault, but I didn't do it on purpose and I still feel awful about that.
"You heard her. She said no," Hawkeye stated. "You know as well as we do the Lagos incident was just a tipping point for ratifying the Accords. It's not Wanda's fault. She's just being used as a scapegoat now because she's the Avenger that's easiest to make look bad in the media, because she's the newest and youngest, and her abilities lend themselves well to being painted poorly to the public. That and simply bad timing. I'd say it's because she has a messy past, but plenty of us heroes do, so that can't be it. What, do you really believe she killed people with Rumlow's bomb on purpose?"
Ross appeared somewhat sorry now. "If she didn't, then she's still a dangerous, out of control, walking nuke, just not a malicious one. And she used to be affiliated with Hydra. Maybe she still has motivations there."
"She and her brother were a couple of misguided impoverished kids trying to save their country. The girl is one of us. She is not a terrorist," Clint replied firmly. "Please let her be. You won, you got us in here, you've restrained her. You don't have to hurt her any further."
"She threatened one of my men on the trip here!"
Wanda knew she didn't appear at all sorry about that, and tried her best to look contrite. Clint said I shouldn't let my pride get in the way. Look apologetic. Don't apologize out loud, just sit and look guilty. It's not hard. You have plenty to feel guilty for, just...not that.
"Because you didn't give us our single phone calls," Sam pointed out, "and she didn't even do that until after she heard Lang shouting his head off. Meaning she wouldn't have done it at all and continued cooperating peacefully if she hadn't overheard. I doubt she threatened to harm your guy anyway. She probably just threatened to free herself."
Scott eyed Wanda curiously. If the girl could free herself, why hadn't she actually done so, phone call, threat, or not? Back during the airport battle, she had been flitting from one teammate to another, providing support and backup when needed; she threw cars around with her telekinesis like it was nothing; she lifted a huge amount of tower-turned-rubble to give Steve and Bucky the path to freedom; and then he had seen her tear wheels off armored trucks in a last-ditch effort to free him and Sam. Because she actually can't, Scott realized, which means on the way here she was just acting. She's like a Squishy Wizard. Scott decided he would keep this realization to himself.
"What do you have to say about that, Maximoff?" Ross asked now.
"I say my teammates should not be thrown in this place at all," Wanda informed him, "and that he is correct. I would not have done that if I had not heard Scott shouting." Stay calm. Do not mouth off. Just say your piece politely.
"If you feel so strongly about that, is there also a reason you've not done anything about it yet? Maybe you don't care as much as you claim."
Wanda considered how to answer that question for a moment, not wanting to reveal that the phone call incident was all an act. Across the table, Scott looked about ready to burst out with some exclamation, and she shook her head slightly. Nobody interfere. Please. "I believe we are somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean. I don't exactly have a way to get us off the Raft safely, so I would just end up getting all of us killed," she said finally. Okay, I guess that's...somewhat logical. Please let him believe me. Please.
"Take them to the cells. We're done here for tonight."
Finally. Then maybe we'll be left alone, Wanda thought, pleased that at least for tonight, she would not have to talk to Ross any longer. The man set her on edge and made her tense, and now she was a little bit terrified what he might decide to do to her or the others if he did realize she truly did not have any power access here. Right now he might hate her guts and probably think she was a nutcase for allowing the mistreatment to continue, but if he put two and two together that she was actually helpless, this was going to become an absolute nightmare. At least right now she had some semblance of control over the situation-or appeared to, anyway-and she knew the man was scared of her, even if he wouldn't admit it. I cannot let him find out. I won't.
Chapter 2
Summary:
In which the Raft absolutely sucks, but Wanda isn’t alone because she has friends also stuck there with her.
Also, cue escape attempt...
Notes:
Thank you to everyone reading so far!:)
I don’t know if this needs an extra TW since if characters are stuck in the Raft, you kind of expect Bad Things to happen, but...TW for violence and such anyway.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda felt her shaky legs buckle under her immediately upon being shoved into this new cell, and she fell hard on her knees. She did not make a sound, just awkwardly scooted over to a wall and pushed herself against it until she was sitting up again. The clear door slid shut, but she ignored that too. One of the guards appeared less hateful than the other one, so she focused on that one and asked him for some water.
"This once. Dinnertime's passed. Get this one some water," the man ordered the other guard. "With a straw." Like the ones that had dragged her out of the helicopter earlier, this man seemed utterly indifferent, though the other one gave her a disgusted look before sauntering off. Clearly he did not want to have to do extra work, like fetching prisoners water when it was not 'dinnertime'.
Wanda stayed silent until she received the promised water, delivered in a plastic tumbler with a straw. The guard she didn't like slammed it on the bench that served as a bed in the cell and stalked back out without a word...and then she heard that beeping noise again and instinctively squeezed her eyes shut. That's not fair. I didn't do anything. Wanda heard the other guard admonishing his friend in a faraway sort of way, something about not punishing prisoners for no reason or without orders. I have another piece of information. The one that did this is called Damian. Then there was Clint's voice shouting angrily. Wanda lay quietly on the floor for awhile, her body still trembling from the shocks, now wondering if that guard-Damian-would just activate the collar yet again if she so much as moved wrong. Maybe he will just get assigned somewhere else in the prison, she thought hopefully.
That was probably too much to hope for, because certainly stupid Ross was not going to care if Damian went about shocking her whenever he pleased. "I'm...okay. I just asked for water," Wanda said aloud upon hearing Clint calling and asking what had happened. He sounded across from her own cell and farther down the row, and she couldn't see him, though she thought she might be able to properly if they were both in the front corners of their respective cells. Or, if she couldn't see him, then she'd be able to see either Scott or Sam, because they were across from her own cell too.
"The idiot shocked you for that?" Clint sounded pissed again, and there was a loud thump of something being punched, probably the door of his cell.
"Shut up or I'll give her another hit."
"All right, all right, shutting up. Come get your jollies harassing someone else instead and leave my kid alone." Wanda thought it was lucky for Damian that Clint was stuck in his own cell, because that tone meant Damian was in dire trouble once her friend got to him.
"She's not your kid or even a kid."
"Am I supposed to answer that or do you still want me to shut up?"
Wanda decided to get to her water now while Damian was distracted by Clint, just in case he decided her doing that bugged him too. Part of her rather expected something to be wrong with it, so she was unsurprised to find out it was saltwater and not drinkable in the first place. She didn't bother asking for new water, just kicked the bench in frustration and went back to leaning against the wall.
The indifferent guard glanced at her when he heard the noise, but then shrugged seeing that nothing weird had happened and Wanda was merely sitting there. Wanda closed her eyes and stayed silent, trying to think of something to distract her from the present. I did start to send a telepathic message earlier successfully without setting the collar off. I know the team doesn't like me poking at their heads, but... She did not believe Clint would mind if she attempted talking to him that way, not here. Heck, he'd told her it was okay if she needed to communicate with him in an emergency and she couldn't in any other way. Wanda peeked toward the glass to make sure no one was watching her, just in case this didn't work, before closing her eyes and carefully reaching out mentally toward her friend. There! "Is this okay?" she asked as quickly as she could, and instantly withdrew the mental action again, not wanting to press her luck. Then, "I'm not sure how long I can keep the channel open without-" Wanda scrunched herself into a tighter ball as the connection snapped. This wasn't as bad as the previous shocks and didn't completely debilitate her, even though it was still painful, so clearly it must depend on how much power she tried to use, and this technically used very, very little.
There was a surprised pained noise simultaneously from across the aisle, and Wanda knew she had somehow made Clint feel the same thing she had by accident. Oh no. I don't want to do that, no matter what. I won't.
The indifferent guard was looking at her suspiciously now. "What did you do? And are you done with that water yet?"
"...It's saltwater," Wanda said after a moment. What do I say? I can't let them know I have at least a little bit of a way communicate even when I'm not supposed to talk. "My fingers are numb. I tried to move and used a bit of power by accident because I couldn't feel it." There. That sounded believable, though she knew her magic wouldn't do anything so mundane as that by accident just for that.
"That, does not explain why your friend the archer over there made a weird surprised noise at the exact same time you set your collar off." The guard still looked suspicious, not threatening exactly, just suspicious and, Wanda noticed, a smidgen fearful. "You can get in people's heads. Make them see or feel things. Did you do something to him?"
"I don't do mind tricks anymore," Wanda said calmly, which was true; she was officially not supposed to do such things, even on missions. "Moreover, why would I even want to do that to him? Clint Barton is my friend. If I could, I would do it to your hateful coworker." Also true; she would most definitely like to make Damian see his worst nightmares or something.
Now the guard seemed to believe her, though he also looked more disturbed now. "Don't you dare move, don't try anything funny, and no talking. But I'll get different water," he said, and reopened the cell door, eyeing her closely with another collar remote in hand while he grabbed the tumbler and exited. It was very obvious he did not wish to be anywhere near her.
Wanda found it simultaneously amusing and disheartening that this man was the one scared of her, and he was the one carrying something capable of disabling her immediately if she tried to do anything. She closed her eyes and went back to her telepathic messaging experiment. "I'm sorry for" Pause. "making you feel," pause, "that." No more shocks assaulted her, thank goodness. Wanda kept herself from reacting in any visible manner, but now she was very, very relieved. I guess a few words at a time are okay, but I need to find some way to...get replies.
Damian had sauntered off on his rounds, seemingly grown tired of harassing the Avengers. "Hey, Scott, go to the front corner of your cell, would you?" Clint asked. "I think you're the one closest to Wanda, so you might be able to see her. Hopefully."
"Yeah, well, I can see into the front left side of it, I think, but she's not there...never mind. She's coming-I can see her now!" Scott waved at her and then said, "Oh sorry, I guess that might have been rude, because you can't wave back," which made Wanda smile.
I'm glad I can at least see one of them. Wanda was unsure if speaking aloud was going to get her into trouble again, even though she didn't see any guards in the vicinity at the moment, so she stayed quiet.
"Is she all right?" Clint asked, not trusting Wanda to admit it if she wasn't, in fact, holding up okay.
"Yeah, I mean, she still looks a little banged up obviously, but no worse than before. She's smiling," Scott reported. "...And I think she wants me to ask you or Sam something. She's blinking an awful lot and trying to look past me further down the aisle."
Nod, nod, nod.
"It's okay, Wanda. Really," Clint said quickly, certain she simply wanted confirmation that it was okay to continue sending him telepathic messages and that he wasn't mad at her for sharing pain from the shock by accident. I know she didn't do that intentionally.
"Hey, I can't see you either, but I'm glad one of us can," Sam said cheerfully. He sounded even farther away than Clint did; Wanda could barely hear him.
"I'm so sorry," pause, "I will not," pause, "let that happen," pause, "again". Wanda knew Clint was just trying to figure out how to answer her without revealing that she was able to talk to him in his head, just in a limited way, but the silence still made her uneasy.
"I don't know what to say other than it's okay," Hawkeye said finally, hoping that Wanda would understand why he would not say anything more. "It is probably fine to talk, you know; there's nobody around now."
"I'm scared to. I don't want any more of those horrible shocks if I can help it," Wanda sent back, still pausing between every three or four words since she was not willing to risk any more strung together. "I wish I was on the same side as all of you," she said quietly, shoulders tense.
That figures. Of course she's scared. It's probably good that she was willing to admit it, though. "I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you. Scott, could you hear her?"
"I think she said she wanted to be on this side of the aisle. No you don't, this way we can communicate better," Scott said firmly.
Wanda heard footsteps coming down the aisle and immediately turned away from the glass, as if she had simply decided to move and sit on the other side of the cell, not talk to the others. Scott was now abruptly chattering about some goofy incident involving Ant-ony and a bathtub, and she knew he was trying to keep any attention off of her.
The indifferent guard had finally returned with the water, and he was watching her warily again. "What are you doing? You were over there when I left," he said, nodding toward the opposite side of the cell.
Am I supposed to answer? "Nothing. I moved so I could hear the team better," Wanda answered. I need to find out if this one cares if I talk, at least. Ask. "Is that no talking order still in effect?"
"I don't much care if you talk or not so long as there are no more...incidents." The guard did the same wary skitter in and skitter out that he had done before; he kept the remote in his hand but didn't activate it. The new tumbler of water was on the bench again, same as before. Wanda stared at him, feeling baffled and puzzled. Why had he said that before then, if he didn't care? The man went off down the aisle with a sigh, muttering something about coworkers being as sucky as being stationed at a remote prison in the first place, because they were making extra work for him. I don't think he gives a crap about any of us. I don't think he hates us, not even me, he just doesn't care.
The new water tasted fine, and she debated between drinking all of it and saving some in case she didn't receive any more anytime soon. I should drink it. It might get taken away, or someone else like Damian might pull the same trick again. "Finishing my water," Wanda said simply when she heard Hawkeye asking what she was doing now. "The other tumbler had saltwater in it before."
"Damian dude is a jerk," Scott added, not very helpfully.
"Okaaayyy maybe let's not antagonize the guards," Sam scolded, ever the peacemaker. "But. Accurate."
"What, it's true!"
"Shut up, people, it's bedtime," a new voice ordered.
"How's about some lights out?" Clint asked.
"Lights don't change, they stay the same at all times. Now, quiet."
Wanda moved back to her front corner spot where she could see Scott, preferring the floor over curling up on the bench if it meant she'd feel a little more connected with the others. It must be very late now, and now the hope that the bright artificial lighting would be at least dimmed was gone. I thought there would at least be a lights out? This is...weird. Wanda was more than used to sleeping in dark surroundings, not stark, grating, white lights above a gray setting like this. If she tried sleeping on her back, then the headache-inducing lights would be shining in her eyes. If she curled up on her side, it made her already-achy pinned arms hurt worse. Wanda finally just stayed sitting and drew her knees up as much as she could, closing her eyes. And it's cold in here. That is petty of me, what did I expect? Tomorrow was absolutely going to suck; she was positive they were going to get questioned where Steve and Bucky might be. They probably hadn't thus far because the Raft's staff was too lazy to do so. That nasty little Ross was probably sending Iron Man out to look for them, she thought in annoyance. I wonder if Stark even knows where we are, and if he does...does he care? I don't know. I just don't know.
No, he would at least want to help the others, if not me. Wanda knew there was not exactly any love lost between her and Tony; before all of the Accords mess happened, they would work together and be civil, of course, but they sure as heck did not trust one another very much, nor would she say they were friends. More a grudging respect than anything else. She found him arrogant and frustrating (and he was still the culprit for creating that bomb that killed her parents), and she knew Stark didn't trust her after the nightmarish mind trick she'd done to him-very understandable-but he also did not like things he couldn't fully understand or control...and Wanda's mysterious abilities went precisely in that category. Still, she didn't believe he would condone what was happening to her here, either, even if he didn't like her. Surely he would pull some legalese or bribe out to at least get them better prison conditions...right? But he just watched and didn't say anything at all back in the airport, and he definitely saw what they did to me immediately, a little voice reminded her. I mean...what was he supposed to do, though? Even if he did interfere, he would have just gotten arrested himself, right?
Maybe Vision would tell him this is not fair. If he...knew, anyway.
"Good night, friends! Good night, assholes!" Scott announced now. Wanda's head jerked up and she gave him a look, worried that snarky comment would just get her another hit from the shock collar, but Ant-Man looked puzzled. He gave her a little wave and then disappeared from view, presumably to whatever bench or cot was in his own cell.
"Thought you were told if you mouthed off, the girl gets another hit. I'd say that's mouthing off!" There was a loud bang! as something slammed against Scott's cell door, and Wanda tensed, watching with wide eyes and silently waiting for something else horrible to happen. Scott edged back into view.
"Wait, wait, don't hurt her. She didn't do anything. Sorry, it was just a joke. Keeping morale up and all, you know?" Scott said all in a rush.
"Morale'll be gone soon enough," The guard scoffed. "You get off with a warning this time!"
Wanda let herself relax...and then yelped as another shock caught her off guard. More annoyed with Scott for saying something stupid and herself for making any noise than the fact that the dumb guard had thought saying he was giving a warning and then setting the collar off anyway was funny, she lay on the floor until the trembling dissipated from her limbs again. Then she sat up and glared at Scott, who was watching her in a guilty silence. Can you please not do that? she begged silently.
Sorry, Ant-Man mouthed back.
Wanda thought Scott looked upset enough that she couldn't stay annoyed with him for long. She nodded and gave him a fleeting smile. This seemed to reassure him enough that she was okay, because he visibly relaxed.
In the morning, be ready for anything.
In the morning (Day 1 on the Raft, Wanda filed away in her head), she received a new tumbler of water without requesting it. And nothing else, she thought, mildly annoyed that the others got actual breakfast, but then again, she wouldn't be able to eat it, so she decided to hold her tongue. Don't say anything, keep quiet, don't make trouble.
It was probably a nasty breakfast anyway, considering she could hear Scott joking that he wouldn't feed whatever it was even to his ants. She had gone hungry plenty of times in the past, so missing a meal or two was not a big deal.
Wanda drank the water as quickly as she could, tense and worried someone was going to take it away. There were two guards watching her, and she watched them right back. They are going to come in here the second I'm finished. I need to calm down. Be a rock. Clint told me to cooperate as much as I could, but appear like I'm unbothered and neutral if I can. "Only display another reaction if you think it will help you in some way," she remembered him telling her. "They'll feed off your fear. Use that. They'll be scared of you. Use that, too, if you have to. Whatever you think will help keep you the safest."
Wanda found herself wondering just what Clint thought was going to happen that he had told her those things, giving her signed instructions like that on the trip here and looking...scared while he did so.
She discovered why upon being knocked out and waking up back in that room from the night before strapped in a chair, with Ross pacing about the room in front of her. There were four guards, one stationed in each corner of the room. Wanda sighed and said nothing.
"Answer my questions and you will be allowed to return to your cell. Refuse to cooperate and you will be punished."
Wanda continued watching him and remained silent. I am not giving you any response to that. Posturing, rude person.
"Let's start with the basics. Give your name."
You already know my name, and that isn't a question. Wanda answered this truthfully. The exchange went on, asking her birth date, where she was from, and other simple things of that nature, all of which she was certain was in her profile and paperwork back at the Avengers Compound and easily acquired. This was stupid, but if Ross wanted to waste time asking questions like that, then whatever, he could waste time and she didn't care. Except, then he asked her about 'what happened to the speedy half of the Maximoff twins', and she abruptly tensed, eyes glaring daggers into Ross. "You know what happened to Pietro," she spat. He died saving Clint and a little boy. He only was a hero for one day. One. And I'm still here, and now I'm dumped in a horrible underwater prison for trying to do the right thing. Not even for those poor people I hurt and killed in Lagos because I messed up, but because I broke the Accords.
She would not talk about Pietro, not here. That was not a topic open for discussion. Ross could do or say whatever he wanted to her, she decided, she did not care. Pietro deserved better than to get lumped in with her in some ridiculous interrogation from a man she hated. Wanda lifted her chin and wouldn't say anything else, not when Ross told the guards to hit her, not after another shock.
"You're stubborn."
"I have been experimented on by terrorists before. I am not scared of you. I will not discuss my brother. He deserves better than that." Wanda paused, thinking about Clint back in that cell block. He would tell her she should shush up, because this was not helping protect her. If anything, she was probably making things worse for herself. Silence was okay about this, but not anything more.
"I wonder what he might think about this, then." A plain manila folder slapped on the table. Then there were photos, a whole slew of graphic photos Wanda had a sickening feeling were from Lagos.
Don't say anything. Stay quiet. He is looking for a reaction. Wanda didn't close her eyes; she stared straight ahead and said nothing. I am not here, I am somewhere else, I am-
"People died because of you. This is the damage you caused."
"That bomb wasn't mine," Wanda said, but she did not sound confident anymore and she knew it. I don't want to cry here. Stop it. Stop, stop, stop. "I was trying to help."
"You were containing it and you lost control. You threw it into-"
"Why are you talking about this?" Wanda's eyes fell on one of the pictures spread out on the table. One in particular of two kids standing next to a human-shaped lump covered by a tarp drew her attention, and she wished she hadn't let herself look at all. One of the children was crying and injured, clutching the leg of the older one. Those children could have been Pietro and me. They probably lost their parent or guardian just like we did and it's my fault because I was too weak to protect them. I-stop it. Stop stop stop, stop thinking, I can't do anything to help them now. Wanda could vaguely hear Ross still blathering, something that hadn't her parents died in an explosion too, same as these people? And now wasn't she responsible for doing that same thing to someone else? How did that make her feel?
Now she couldn't stop hot tears from trickling down her cheeks, and she scrunched her eyes shut, but she could still see those two children in her head, picture them asking why? why didn't you protect us? "Stop it. Please stop. I don't want t-to hear any more!" Wanda knew she had done something wrong breaking down like that, and she bit her lip hard.
"That didn't take long. Now maybe you'll cooperate. Why are you here?"
That, I will answer. "Because I didn't s-sign...sign the Accords and went on...on being an Avenger anyway." Wanda tried her best to get herself under control again, but those pictures had set her off and she had already stupidly broken down crying. Why oh why had she let herself do that? I don't know what to do. I'd rather Ross be scared of me than let him know what really hurts me, and I already ruined that.
"You don't think it's because of the Lagos incident." Ross had this odd satisfied expression Wanda couldn't quite understand, and the tears still blurring her vision didn't help.
Wanda considered this briefly before answering truthfully. "I know it isn't. You...you used me and my horrible mistake to get the Accords approved. I don't think you actually care about those...poor people at all." You wouldn't be showing me those pictures and looking satisfied that I cried, then. "Are you sending aid? Is the US helping them? Did you send poster boy Iron Man there to help fix the mess I made?"
"As a matter of fact, yes, and-"
"All about the image, isn't it. Your country didn't help mine when I was a child. How many other thousands of children are being hurt in poor countries now and not being helped because it doesn't suit your...agenda? You are probably glad I messed up, so that you can use the incident to make the media support the Accords and then show the heroes that signed them cleaning up the mess," Wanda interrupted snappishly, sounding more resentful than upset now. Don't look at the photos any more. Don't, don't, don't. Another shock ripped through her, probably because she had mouthed off at the man, but she did not care at this point.
"That's right, you aren't a US citizen. You're never going anywhere, there's nobody to-"
"That has nothing, nothing to do with anything whatsoever, you prejudiced piece of trash," she seethed. I am going to shred you to pieces if I have the chance. I will be your absolute worst nightmare. "I already know no one plans to just let me go after a certain sentence. And it is because you are all scared of what I can do. Not because I have no US citizenship." And I do have someone to fight for me. Captain America will get us out, and that includes me. So there.
"Where are Captain America and the Winter Soldier?"
That's a switch. "I don't know." This was the truth; Wanda knew they had successfully escaped the airport, but that was it. Being asked that question now also meant they hadn't been caught, so that was also good.
"I don't believe you. Where are they?"
Go ahead and don't believe me then. "I do not know."
shock
"I don't know."
shock
"I. Don't. Know."
"Are you okay?"
No. "I'm fine."
"There were...pictures of Lagos. Children. I was stupid. I cried. I don't want...to be here...anymore."
"Do you want to talk?"
Silence. "Stark Industries made...my shock collar. I didn't believe Ross. So he...showed me. Why did I...bother defending...Tony Stark?"
On Day 2, Wanda woke up after the water and then knockout injection routine to see Clint sitting across from her in the same old interrogation room, shouting something about you clearly got nothing from her yesterday, why is she here now, what the hell did you do to her. "I'm fine," Wanda said quietly, hoping he would just shush up. All those instructions for her to appear neutral and calm, and now he was shouting and nothing had even happened yet. "You told me...to appear neutral," she told him telepathically.
Clint went silent, studying Wanda. She kept her gaze down at the table, not on him or Ross, but she appeared more angry than frightened or docile. The only sign she was also scared was that she seemed awfully tense. "Why is she here? You questioned her yesterday. You questioned the rest of us yesterday too after you had her dumped back in the cell block. There's no need to have Wanda here to go through the same routine with me all over again."
"You seemed to need more convincing. Perhaps having her here will help with that," said Ross.
"Then convince me and put Wanda back. She doesn't know anything, you don't need her in here. If she was going to say anything, she would have yesterday from the looks of her." Clint knew quite well why his younger teammate was in the room: Ross thought it was pointless to hurt him, so he wanted to use Wanda to get to him. That, and if someone outside the Raft found out, it would be more likely to get pushback if someone else was harmed besides Wanda, because with anything that happened to her, Ross could simply claim she was being uncooperative or something and was "protecting" himself and everyone else from her.
Now Wanda looked at Clint, quite offended that he was making it sound like they should all expect her to have broken already. He's trying to protect me. I should stay quiet. Pretend I did break. Or would. She looked down again, sending another message, "Don't you dare...say anything...to that man on...account of me. I will be fine."
"Your teammate is stubborn and has a major attitude problem. That's her own fault she got hurt."
"Good for her. I hope she shreds your reputation when we get out of here. Yeah, I'm sure she gave herself bruises and cuts on her face and neck while tied up like that. That's real believable. I don't care what she said to you, you can't justify that." And you purposely showed her graphic photos from Lagos because she wouldn't react the way you wanted otherwise, purposely told her Tony made the very thing that's restraining her here. What for? Clint could not mention those things, because Wanda had not expressed them out loud, only telepathically, so he shouldn't know them. "Let her go back to her cell. I think she's had enough."
"I can't do that."
"I'll bet the heroes that did sign the Accords will not support this," Clint said now, trying a different tack.
"They don't know what happens here."
"Bet they'll find out. Things don't stay under wraps forever. You think the Vision supports you harming humans? He's programmed to protect humans."
"Maybe she isn't human."
Wanda flinched but kept her mouth shut. Don't react, don't react. Stay quiet.
"Bullshit and you know it. That's-" Clint abruptly went quiet. If he didn't know better, he would think Wanda was having a seizure; the light on the shock collar was blinking and the girl had her eyes scrunched shut, though she didn't make a sound, even as a few tears trickled down her cheeks. Clearly Ross had grown tired of the exchange and wanted to shut him up. "Can you please leave her alone? She has not done anything whatsoever. She's just sitting there. Stop hurting her."
"You cooperate and stop stalling or she gets another one."
"There's nothing else to share." Clint glanced at Wanda again, but she didn't look up.
"Where's Captain America and the Winter Soldier?"
"Don't you dare...say anything to that...man on account...of me." Wanda's silent message, grouped in the usual sets of three or four words, pinged into Clint's head. She was staring across the room at the wall now, her green eyes blazing fire even as she remained quiet. The only signs that she wasn't okay was her breathing hard and biting her lip.
"We didn't discuss that," Clint said immediately.
"I don't believe you."
Not this again, Wanda thought. Predictably another shock went through her, and she tried her best not to react, knowing she must be failing miserably. It's never going to end.
"...Wait, wait, wait, stop it! I might have a suspicion..."
Wanda glared at her friend, half worried he might actually be giving something away to save her from any more pain, but Clint appeared nonplussed. He's going to lie.
"We didn't discuss it, but maybe try..." Clint listed a half dozen places he claimed Cap and Bucky might be and were certainly not, because they were way too specific and she was very sure even if Clint did give away any information just for her, it wouldn't be that specific or easy. He was definitely lying.
Ross too was clearly suspicious. "Those seem a little too obvious."
"Perhaps they might go to one of those places under the assumption it is too obvious and you wouldn't bother looking," said Clint calmly. Then, to make it at least a little more convincing that he had perhaps shared something he didn't want to share simply because he wanted to protect Wanda, he added, "Can't you send her back now? I gave you something."
Wanda did her best to crumple a bit, as if she were so tired she might be close to passing out. Pretending she had passed out had worked the day before, anyways...after awhile. She hadn't dared to try that too soon, scared that it would give away that she was pretending, or that Ross would not care and continue anyway.
"Take her back to the cell while we investigate these places."
On Day 3, it was Sam in the interrogation room with her.
Sam only said, "You got your information already. We have nothing more to share with you." Then he looked at Wanda and added, "I'm sorry," very, very quietly.
And then he would not say anything else whatsoever. Wanda did not have permission to speak to him telepathically and she had no way to ask if it was okay without also alerting Ross or the guards that she could do that, so she decided to follow his lead and also remain silent.
The only other thing Sam said, in an odd strained but otherwise neutral voice, was "You have broken a slew of human rights laws. You'll pay later."
On Day 4, she found Scott in the interrogation room. Scott...talked a lot. He answered all Ross's questions in great minute detail, some of it true, some of it lies. He asked innocent questions himself. He went on about his house, that he missed Cassie, his previous experiences in prison ("The Raft by far takes the prize as the absolute worst, tell me again why we're here? Don't you get a slap on the wrist the first time?"), that he was sorry but he thought the food was quite bad and maybe it would be easier to get answers from people if the prisoners were fed better ("Because we might forget things!").
Wanda kept her mouth shut; watching Scott talk at length while not actually mouthing off at their captors like she and Clint had done was...oddly successful at keeping the focus off of her. Ross had only shocked her once, and it was right at the beginning because he wanted to demonstrate what would happen if Scott did not talk. Scott had been thoroughly disturbed but immediately collected himself and...well, he was talking. I could never do that. Never in a million years. He sounded agreeable, like he was cooperating, but none of it was useful.
The trouble started when Ross asked again where Steve and Bucky were, saying that Clint's "leads" were all duds and there had better be no more lies or, shock. Scott hesitated and glanced at Wanda, knowing that saying I don't know wasn't going to help. But...he really didn't know; there was nothing else to share. "Sure, she's not a kid, but she's the team's kid. Let her alone. You wouldn't want someone hurting your daughter for information she doesn't have or just because maybe she made a mistake, would you?"
"I'm not asking her for information, I'm asking you. That mistake in Lagos killed people, Lang."
"I don't have that information, even if I wanted to give it to you. And I don't even know if 'mistake' is the right word, because I've seen crappy video footage on YouTube. That wasn't her bomb. And the thing was going to go off whether Wanda tried to contain it or not. Nobody could stop that from happening." Scott glanced at Wanda again, but she looked close to tears now; mentioning Lagos seemed to have abruptly made her passive and very upset. The normal spark in her eyes was gone...and then she hung her head as much as the collar would let her. "Point being, it sucks, it's really horrible, but people were going to die no matter what. It's not fair to blame her, or Captain America, either. Now the world has lost both of them, Hawkeye, Falcon, and, uh, Ant-Man. Hey, what's your hero code name, Wanda?"
"...I don't have one," Wanda said in a small voice. I don't even want to know what people are calling me online. No thank you.
"Red or Scarlet something," Scott suggested, quite pleased with this idea. "Maybe we should-"
Wanda didn't look up even as Scott began another long story about nicknames and maybe scarlet was more interesting and oh, it's pretty much magic, isn't it, or is magic just science they didn't understand yet, did Ross have a good idea to share-a nice one not an insult please!-and on and on.
Ross grew tired of the going down a rabbit hole off-topic talking and activated the collar finally. "That's enough stalling."
"Don't do that! She didn't even do anything!" Scott shouted. "You're going to kill her if you keep doing that. Then she can't answer anything for you, you know."
"You can make it stop."
It was going to be a long, long morning.
On Day 5, there was none of the normal morning routine because Tony Stark came to the Raft. Wanda was suspicious this was because whether Stark had created that horrid collar or not, there was no way he would approve of what else was going on within the Raft. Besides, people like Damian, who seemed to like activating it just for fun every time he walked past on his rounds, made it much, much worse than it had to be.
She pointedly ignored Tony and stared into space blankly when he walked by her own cell. I don't want to talk to you. Go away.
And then she heard two very, very quiet words, almost like he didn't want her or anyone else to hear him. "I'm sorry."
That was...unexpected. "Then get us out of here," Wanda said flatly.
"You know I can't do that. You all broke the law. I'm working on negotiating house arrest or something for-"
"House arrest? Do you seriously believe anyone is going to let you put any of us on house arrest, let alone me?" Wanda struggled to sit up straight and glared at Tony. "And you had no right to do that to me before in the first place, at the Compound."
"I tried to protect you before in the Avengers Compound. You left and put Vision through the floor. That was your choice. So no, I don't," Tony told her. "Hawkeye, Falcon, and Ant-Man...probably."
"That figures." Wanda sounded resigned and more than a little angry now. "You were not trying to protect me. You were trying to protect everyone else from me." I know that much. Leave me alone.
There was a brief silence. Then, "It was both."
"It doesn't matter. Go away. You can't get me out of here even if you wanted to. I don't want to hear anything else from you."
"...Vision misses you."
"What do you care whether he does or not? You're probably glad to see me here like this."
"Good gosh, Wanda, I don't hate you. Insufferable little witch."
"Arrogant, frustrating idiot."
"I've been called worse."
"So have I." Wanda spied Scott across the aisle, looking extremely confused. "Maybe you'd better explain to Ant-Man why we still do not care for one another. He seems confused."
"You've been here for five days and haven't expressed utter hatred of Iron Man?" Tony asked, only half joking. Especially now after this.
Now Wanda looked baffled. "Little too busy being tortured," she shot back in a soft voice. "I do not hate you anymore. You know that."
"You might've changed your mind."
"Well, I didn't. I just want an explana-"
"Time's up. Move on, sir," said a guard from outside the cell, ushering Tony away.
He did not look back, and Wanda was left feeling more baffled about the man than she had been before. Tony wasn't acting like he was at all sorry, but he had definitely apologized at the start, too. Tony Stark did not apologize. That was very odd and there had been no reason for him to whisper that if it wasn't the truth, or to let her know that Vision missed her. He's sorry he can't do anything for us? Sorry he created that collar? What?
And can't Vis help us get out? Surely he has the power to do that...unless he literally can't...
"Answer my questions and you will be allowed to return to your cell. Refuse to cooperate and you will be punished."
Day 6. Wanda merely sighed, because Ross said this exact thing every single time he had her brought back to that interrogation room they had all been in the first day upon arrival. There was water to drink in the morning and then a few minutes later guards reappeared, injected her with something that knocked her out, and then she'd wake up strapped to something in that room. Mostly she simply used the routine to keep track of how many days passed. Six, so far. It did not seem to matter what she said or didn't say; the horrible man clearly still hated her. "Do you not have anything better to do? You already know exactly what will happen. You ask questions, you don't like the answers, you torture me until I pass out or you get tired of it, you throw me back in the cell." How long until Steve finds us? I'm so, so tired. And hungry. And everything hurts. Wanda already felt like something was breaking inside her, not even because of anything done to her physically, but because Ross seemed to know exactly what actually made her tick. And it's my fault he knows. That first day when he had shown her a bunch of graphic photos of victims from Lagos and started talking about her own parents and she broke down in tears almost immediately had seemingly ruined any kind of control she had at all. I hate him and I hate me for letting him get to me.
"Today is different. Surely you noticed something different today already, yes?"
Wanda blinked and glanced around the distasteful room. None of my teammates are in here. "Perhaps you simply haven't fetched any of the others yet and wish to make me wait so this all takes that much longer. I don't know why you do what you do; you should know I won't break by now." I even told you the truth too: I really don't know where Steve and Bucky are.
"Oh, you broke day one, Wanda, and you know it," Ross said.
Don't use my name, don't even think about it, I don't want to hear it out of your mouth. "You made me cry. You didn't break me. I don't have anything else to tell you," Wanda shot back instantly.
"We're doing something different today. Perhaps if we can figure out how your power works, you can have better living conditions here. So-"
"What is it you are up to now? Get to the point."
"I want you to use your power, to locate Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes, and then so we can figure out how to remove it. You said you could, back on the helicopter. So do it."
Wanda stared at him, her heart pounding in her chest. Now what? I literally can't. "Do you think I am stupid? You just want an excuse to activate the collar again. No thank you."
"You said you could break it, after all," Ross countered. "So locate those two fugitives."
There is no point. He's going to find out eventually. May as well express it myself. "I can't," she responded calmly, remembering Clint telling her she should just express the simple truth if it wasn't going to matter one way or the other. This definitely did not matter one way or the other.
"What was with you making threats on the helicopter and then again a couple days ago then?"
"Maybe I lied." Wanda kept her voice steady, though she knew she sounded exhausted anyway. "Maybe I lied, and you and your men are such cowards you just believed the girl you beat up and electrocuted could still rip you to shreds if she wished." And believe me, I wish.
"You're lying now!"
"Am I? I didn't use my power on that helicopter at all. I just made your man twice my size think I was going to." Wanda had a small inkling that this was just going to piss Ross off, but if he was going to hurt her again today anyway, then, well...she would say whatever she pleased at this point. "You are all scared of me and will hate me no matter what I do or don't do."
"You can find Captain America and the Winter Soldier. Now do it."
A new idea floated tantalizingly in her head, something that was probably a fool's errand, but if she could make it work... What if I said yes but...tried to do something else instead? Wanda's eyes flicked toward one of the guards in the room, ready to act if Ross ordered him to. There were four, and two she had immediately ruled out, because one was Damian, who she already knew hated her, and another who just...had similar vibes to her. The other two seemed more indifferent, like they did not feel bad for participating in torturing someone, but weren't enjoying themselves either. They were just here to do a job; they didn't care. One of them would be easier to force to do something they weren't supposed to do. It would be more satisfying to manipulate Damian, of course, but that was the most risky, so bad option.
She had not tried mind-controlling anyone here, obviously, and she didn't know how long it could hold if she did try, but what if she could make someone deactivate the shock collar? Then she would at least have a chance, and Ross wanted her to use her power anyway, so he wouldn't be suspicious and knock her out if she set the collar off herself trying to do something. Do it, do it, her thoughts prodded, he wants you to do something, well, make him think you're folding. If I can get someone to disable that collar, or better yet, get it off...I can break free. Shield up, find the team, blast those cells open. Right? Right? It was a long shot, but not impossible. The worst that would happen was that it would fail and she would get hurt (again), but that would happen even if she did nothing. I will try. I owe it to myself and my team to at least try. Wanda dipped her head, as if defeated, and even squeezed her eyes shut. "...Okay," she whispered, "yes, I'll...I'll do it." Then, mentally to Clint in her usual at this point spurts of three or four words at a time, "I'm going to try something. Maybe it will get us out."
"Hurry up and stop stalling," Ross ordered.
Shut up, Wanda thought, her mental focus on the guard she had chosen as requiring the least amount of energy to manipulate. I'll only have a second. I need to grab him instantly for this to have a chance of working. In a second, she snapped her eyes open and reached out to snatch hold of the guard's mind. DISABLETHATCOLLARANDTAKEITOFF, she screamed mentally as fast as she could, her eyes glowing red. The now-familiar spasm of white-hot pain made her body seize again, snapping Wanda's concentration on her magic, but the order had successfully transmitted and the shock ceased as quickly as it had come.
Disabled. It must be. I can access my power now. An instant later and she was able to snap an achy arm free. Scarlet wisps of magic swirled around her left hand and threw Damian and the other guard she'd immediately discarded as an option to mind-control against a wall. Focus. Focus. Need to get out of the chair. Neutralize Ross. Wanda felt dizzier than she expected; she hadn't eaten anything in days at this point and her legs were trembling under her.
I need to get out. Where is Ross?
"The hell is going on?! I don't think she's finding the fugitives, boss!" the other indifferent guard shouted. "Told you this was a questionable idea at best!"
Noise. Wanda's focus snapped to that guard and ordered him, "Fall asleep!" He dropped like a rock. She blinked, stumbling a bit as she tried to locate Ross, a faint red haze still around her hand. She should have focused on him first, but too late now. This was a bad plan, she needed more time to map out some kind of escape route and she hadn't accounted for her power feeling all muzzy and exhausted just because the rest of her was so tired and lightheaded. A shield carrying her and the rest of the team to safety up on the surface level and long enough to wait for or find an escape aircraft was not going to happen, not in any surefire way, at least. What have I done?
The next thing she knew, someone had yanked her arm hard enough that she felt something snap inside, and she screamed. Then the something slammed her face-first into the table. Get up, she ordered herself through the pain haze, if you fail now, you are not going to get another chance. Bits of scarlet shoved the assailant away from her, and she dragged herself away from the table, ribs screaming in protest. Focus. Focus. Who's left? Wanda blinked, scanning the room and struggling not to let the burning pain in her injured arm wreck her concentration. Forget neutralizing the rest; if she could not focus enough to do that right now, then she needed to run. Retreat temporarily. Get out of the interrogation room and find somewhere to hide for a minute while she figured out what to do next.
Wanda went for the door, vaguely aware that the distinctive beep on the collar was happening again as she reached it. "I failed. I'm so sor-" The message to Clint broke, and she immediately crumpled to the floor, landing on the injured arm, which made her yelp. I should have ripped it off myself. Clint told me nobody could simply unlock and remove it, and I forgot, and I should have ripped it apart with my magic first and-
In the row of cells, Clint let out a surprised, pained shout. "I think something bad happened."
"When is something bad not happening in here, Barton?" Sam asked tiredly.
"No, something with Wanda. I just...think she's in bad trouble," Clint said slowly, not willing to reveal why he knew that for certain. Whatever had happened, something had gone badly wrong with Wanda's escape plan she was trying to do and she was injured (again). And there was no way to know what exactly had happened or if she was okay until someone dumped her back in the cell again.
"They should bring her back soon," Scott said quickly. "If something particularly awful did happen, Ross will send her back because she won't be able to talk anymore."
But minutes and then hours passed, and there was no Wanda, and Clint did not get any more telepathic messages from her, which concerned him much more than the momentary excruciating pain she had accidentally transmitted over the telepathic connection. He paced back and forth, punched the walls of his own cell, and every time a guard walked by, he demanded to know where Wanda was and why she wasn't back yet.
"I don't know," "I don't care," and silence were the only reactions he had received so far. Finally, one guard, clearly tired of being questioned every time he walked past on his rounds, said, "There was some kind of incident in the interrogation room. She attacked Ross and the guards in there."
Clint scowled. "I don't believe you. You people have her tied up in a straitjacket and shock collar, how could she have attacked anyone?"
The guard shrugged. "Well, that's what I heard. Ross said he was leaving the witch in solitary for awhile in the interrogation room to contain her powers. Means the rest of you will be left alone, anyway."
"Get her out. Leaving her there isn't helping restrain her power in any way and you know it. That's ridiculous. Tell that asshole to bring her back," Clint ordered, knowing he had no way to make that happen, which was all the more infuriating.
"Hey, I didn't say it made sense, I'm just telling you what he said. I'm not getting myself into trouble for you or her, asking to have her put back in the other cell."
"Why would asking get you into trouble?" Sam's calm voice floated from his cell. "Tell Ross we asked. Blame us. We don't care."
The guard appeared to waffle for a moment. "Someone got punished for disabling that girl's collar temporarily and causing the whole incident. I'm not risking it, no thanks. And she made another man fall asleep."
Now Clint was intrigued. So Wanda must have mind-controlled someone-someones!-briefly in her ill-fated escape efforts. That would explain Ross's behavior, if he thought Wanda had mind-controlled people with the shock collar on. "What did this person say?"
" 'I don't know what happened. I just suddenly felt I NEEDED to disable it and didn't have a choice. I still feel like I need to do what she ordered. What did she do to me?' That's what he said. It was freakish!" The guard looked nervous now and strode away without another word. He sounded like the words had been burned into his head.
Clint sighed and gave the glass a punch for good measure before retreating back to the cot in his cell. "She has gotten herself into a whole heap of extra trouble. Why the hell would she do that? I told her to lie low if possible!"
"'Cause she's mad and would rather try to do something and go down fighting than do nothing and get hurt anyway." Scott tapped anxiously on the door of his own cell, eyeing the empty one across the aisle where their missing teammate should be.
Clint did know this quite well from the other day when he had been the one taken to the interrogation room with Wanda strapped in that chair across from him. It was exceedingly obvious the girl was pissed; she was frightened too, sure, but her green eyes silently blazed fire even as she said nothing and kept her gaze down as he had told her to do. And the repeated don't you dare tell that man a thing on account of me telepathic messages. She did not cry until the two of them were taken back to their cells. Then he'd heard tiny, barely audible sobs coming from Wanda's cell, and when asked if she was okay, she said yes and wouldn't say anything else. "Cap needs to hurry up," he said peevishly.
Wanda actually was awake, but she was still struggling to organize her jumbled memories of...whatever had happened after she'd collapsed at the door. There was definitely something that had jabbed her neck again-which meant she'd been drugged somehow-and there had definitely been more shouting and yelling and pain after that, but she could not remember any of it clearly. At least it was impossible for her to have potentially given Steve and Bucky away and have no memory of doing so, because she genuinely did not know where they had gone or when they might come to rescue them. She had a suspicion she was simply in the same old interrogation room, not somewhere new, just left alone this time and strapped down to that table unable to move.
And her magic felt wrong, as if it had crawled under a bed like a frightened animal and was scared to come out. I'm scared to even try messaging Clint. What if I can't? It would be worse to attempt it and fail and know she no longer had that line of communication open to her than to just...not try for a bit. Wanda was unsure if she had done something to her power subconsciously or if she'd just received one shock too many and that had done something to her. She hesitantly dragged heavy eyes open; there were no sounds around her to suggest that any of those guards or Ross were still there to torment her further.
Darkness. The surroundings were pitch black, an odd, disorienting sensation after being bombarded by the constant harsh artificial light previously for days. I don't know where I am. Wanda blinked, trying to catalogue what she knew. I tried to launch an escape. I failed. Ross was angry and scared. This thought made a brief bit of satisfaction breeze through her sore chest. If that man was going to continue being cruel and unfair to her, then if he was scared, good. He should be scared; she would chew him out if she had the chance.
I wish I remembered what happened! Wanda only had vague, unpleasant recollections of voices shouting and yelling and things...hurting her repeatedly, mostly her battered left arm she deeply suspected was broken. Maybe she could figure out what happened by cataloguing what, precisely, was causing her pain right now. Neck hurt-that was always hurting from the collar's mere presence even when it was not producing shocks; it was just worse now. Discard. Headache...maybe, but she'd already had one because she was hungry. Discard.
It's okay, Wanda, I'm right here. Wanda squeezed tear-filled eyes shut against the darkness. Pietro was not here just because feeling hungry reminded her of huddling together on the streets without food. She needed to focus and not let herself float down some depressing memory lane. Those particular memories were not even bad ones to her any longer; if starving on the streets of Sokovia meant she could have her twin back, she would take the chance in a second.
Stop it, Pietro wouldn't like that. It was horrible. People couldn't or wouldn't help yet another pair of orphans in a sea of thousands, there was that bad man Pietro beat up with a stick to chase him away from trying to steal me. That had been pre-Hydra, but Wanda could remember the incident clearly. They had hidden in a freezing, dirty alley for a long, long time afterwards, unharmed but terrified the bad man would return with friends of his or something. No, she did not want to go back to that. Pietro would tell her she should try messaging Clint, because he would be concerned and it would help her feel better if she could talk to him. Wanda did not know how much time had passed. It could have been minutes, hours, or days, she had no clue at all. "I'm...okay?" she projected hesitantly.
The connection felt more or less normal; it was just her mental 'voice' probably sounded shaky, because she was frightened and hurt and she really really wanted to be dumped back in that too-bright cell, where she could at least see Scott, even if she couldn't see Clint or Sam. "I'm scared. Somewhere dark. I am alone. I think the interrogation room still, but nobody's here," she went on, keeping the words in groups of three or four as she had before.
There was no way to really get a reply back from her friend without being able to keep the connection open, but knowing Clint would at least be able to hear her helped a little. "I am going...to open the...connection for a...couple seconds but...not say anything. Could you...try to reply? Please?" Wanda closed her eyes again, trying to make tears go away. I don't even know if this will work or not, but I can try, at least? 'Talking' mentally was not the same as speaking verbally, and while Pietro could speak to her that way as smoothly as he could breathe or talk normally, she did not know if Hawkeye would be able to do the same. Especially when she couldn't just...leave the connection open for very long. With Pietro she would keep it open all the time, not even needing to do so consciously; he was like an extension of her, her better, more cheerful half.
Wanda reached out mentally to connect to her friend again, but didn't say anything this time. No words came across, but a heavy wave of anger and relief slammed across to her instead, along with a mental image of Clint pacing around his cell, before she closed the connection. That was...odd. Projecting an image should be more complicated than a word or two, and Wanda wondered if she was intruding, crossing a line with her telepathic abilities she shouldn't touch. I'm not trying to read his mind, and I didn't, but...I don't know if Clint meant to do that or not.
"Do you want...me to stop...trying to communicate...like this?" Wanda asked carefully. "You projected...emotions. Anger. Relief. I swear I...didn't read...you. You...sent them." A pause as she repeated her opening the connection but saying nothing action; nothing came across at all. Wanda bit her lip and tasted blood; it must be split. Doesn't matter. Try again.
This time she received an adamant but "staticky" reply, DON'T STOP, mentally loud enough that it made her want to cover her ears instinctively, but she couldn't move her arms and her muscles twitched, sending fresh pain up her injured arm. The right one felt like it might sting or something, as if something rough was rubbing against cuts, but it was nothing compared to the left one. Okay, I'm okay, ignore, ignore, Wanda ordered herself.
"Thank you," she projected back.
A very stilted, awkward conversation unfolded as Wanda slowly explained what she knew happened during her failed escape attempt and that she could not remember everything from afterwards, but it was still a conversation, she was there, and it was happening, and she still had a connection outside of the dark hell of pain and no one could take it away from her because no one knew she was doing it, lying there alone in the darkness. Clint's quick replies were sporadic and inconsistent-he was very bad at sensing when the silent connection was open and clearly needed practice to utilize it properly-but it was enough for Wanda to know that he was there, he was listening to her, and he did not mind the weird telepathic shenanigans.
And, now she knew it was nighttime because Clint had communicated that in the cells, they'd been ordered to shut up again at "bedtime", and that it was the same day of her Escape Incident. Several hours had passed, not minutes or days.
Wanda told him she was pleased they could not deprive her of knowing how much time had passed by leaving her restrained in that room alone in the dark.
Then she added that she hated Ross and wished he would disappear, and she was glad she had at least tried to escape, so there.
Clint was very, very glad Wanda's stubborn, slightly vindictive streak seemed to be intact. She still "sounded" frightened every time she sent her messages, but her mental voice wasn't nearly as shaky as her first "I'm...okay?" had sounded anymore.
In his own cell, Clint wondered how to tell the others what was going on without alerting anyone else that Wanda could most likely talk this way to anyone in the Raft that she pleased. Simply talking to someone must use less of her power than mind-controlling someone, obviously, and that was why she could continue doing this without subjecting herself to more shocks...because it was a tiny amount of power that the collar wasn't detecting, unlike what she had attempted during the failed escape. Scott's annoying drumming on the walls throughout the day gave him an idea. In the morning...he would join the drumming and try communicating the information via Morse code.
Wanda continued messaging Clint sporadically on and off for a long time, mostly just to reassure herself that she was not, in fact, all alone trapped in the dark with no way to move or interact with anyone else. He told me I could talk as much as I wanted. And I know from him that I'll probably be stuck here for awhile. I should let him sleep and stop talking to him. So she sent a quick Please get some sleep, and didn't message him anymore.
She mentally ran through a few entire episodes of shows that she especially liked.
She mentally sang through the entirety of a whole plethora of songs off her favorite playlists.
I don't know how much time has passed. Surely at least a few more hours? She could yell and ask what time it was, but most likely no one would answer her, and if they did, someone like Damian might come back and torture her more. And she wasn't sure if the room was soundproof or not, though she suspected it was, since she couldn't hear anything at all besides her own breathing. Wanda considered asking Clint, but if she did that, he would get even more worried than he was already. No, she couldn't do that yet. Darkness was fine. Darkness was much better than the horrible bright lights of the cells...wasn't it?
Sleep. I should try to sleep. I don't want to sleep here even if I could. Something about even trying to sleep trapped in that room made chills crawl up her back. Logically she knew quite well her teammates could not actually do anything if she slept in her usual cell and someone wanted to hurt her, but at least they were THERE, and there were constant security cameras for those cells. There weren't any here as far as she knew. There were no records of what went on in the interrogation room. There would be no proof of anything that happened, only that she was missing from her normal cell for an extended period of time.
The metal table was freezing, and she shivered. A metal table is not new to me. It does not matter.
It struck her as more than a little disturbing and unfair that the Raft was worse than being with Hydra. Wanda scrunched her eyes shut against the dark.
Notes:
I actually stole Damian the jerk from myself. I have used him as an antagonist OC previously whilst writing lol. I have plans for him...he's being hateful to the wrong person, and once Cap comes to rescue the group, well, Damian better watch it. Heh.
Next chapter is the last one where they are still trapped on the Raft. Then we can get to the rescue and get them out of there!
Chapter 3: Chapter 3
Summary:
In which our heroes are still trapped on the Raft and things are darkest just before the dawn...
Notes:
TW as per previous chapter.
I wanted to separate the Raft segments from the escape segment, so their escape will finally happen NEXT chapter!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"She's back!" Scott shouted. "Except..." he frowned, watching the bit of Wanda's cell that he could see clearly. "Something's wrong."
"We knew that already," Clint snapped. He had been able to communicate part of what he knew to Sam via the Morse code drumming plan, but the guards had quickly realized he'd been secretly communicating something and made him stop...and Scott didn't seem to know Morse code in the first place besides SOS.
"Yeah, but...she's not moving. Usually she reacts if she sees me and she's just laying there where they dropped her. She doesn't look good."
"Well, stop sounding freaked and do something! Talk to her. She can see you, at least. Day 8, morning. Day 8," Clint said pointedly.
Day 8. I survived over a whole day in there by myself. Wanda was glad she had been deposited into her usual spot where she could see into Scott's cell. Whether it was intentional or not, she didn't care. The bright artificial lighting made her squint, especially since one eye wouldn’t open properly anyway, but she could at least see Ant-Man standing in his own cell watching. There was someone talking in a forced-calm tone, something about food and water. Sam. What is Sam talking about?
"You need to give her something to eat and drink. Stark's been here. He saw all of us, including her, just a few days ago. He's in Ross's pocket, sure, but I highly doubt he'll be happy if he finds out one of his ex-teammates dies in prison." Sam kept his voice even.
"There's water in there already," one of the guards said, starting to walk away.
"But, it sounds like she can't get to it now, and you can't keep somebody alive indefinitely on water anyway. It's been over a week and I doubt you people gave her even that in at least a day and a half, maybe more. If you don't want to be near her when she's awake, let one of us out instead." Sam continued appearing calm, but he had his fists clenched behind his back. "You're going to kill her. I get this is a max security prison and it's not going to be a skip in the park, but this is ridiculous. Your boss forget the Geneva Conventions and human rights laws in general?"
"I'm not fetching another meal. Besides, we might get in trouble. That wasn't on the job list for today."
"Then we'll share ours. Look, dude, you still have that atrocious shock collar on her. We don't want her tortured further. You know this. So there will not be any funny business or another escape attempt. Let one of us help." Sam could tell this guard was waffling and might be convinced. "Do you really think any of us would be dense enough to try escaping when we don't have our gear?"
"She tried it! She mind-controlled people. Threw two against a wall."
"Maybe if Ross stopped torturing her, she wouldn't lash out, then," Sam replied, not sounding at all sorry that their teammate had done that. Besides, technically Wanda really did still have her gear; she was just being prevented from accessing it. It made perfectly good sense to him that Wanda would try to escape, because logically she really would have a decent chance to get out if she could just get her restraints off. "You're not supposed to starve prisoners. Not expecting gourmet here, just let her have something to eat. The same stuff the rest of us have been receiving, at least."
This was interesting news; though they had gotten some information from a guard regarding the incident, Clint didn't trust that information source. Wanda had sort of given him an explanation herself, but she was also fuzzy on details of what exactly had happened, and kept focusing on the fact that she had failed. It seemed like she had gotten a bit closer to success and caused more trouble than he had initially assumed...which also meant she had definitely scared their captors further by increasing her own potential threat level, which was also most certainly why Ross had left her isolated like that for so long. He was intentionally weakening her so that she would be less likely to make a repeat performance. "Wanda's attempt failed, you moron," Clint snapped from the adjoining cell. "So what are you so worried about? You still think she's going to rip your mind apart or something?"
"I don't know, but she's still dangerous."
"Barton, chill out. That's not helping," Sam said quickly.
"He's not going to let us help her anyway. Why should I be pleasant to him?"
"Because they're going to hurt her more if we're smartmouths, that's why. Will you please stop setting that thing off, come in here and hit one of us instead!" Scott shouted. "Ross can't even potentially get any information out of her or use her to threaten us if you guys keep this up. Can you please let one of us do like Sam suggested? We're not going to do anything."
"You all carry guns. You all carry remotes to activate that torture device on her. How is it going to risk any of you anything to perhaps let us give our meal to her?" Sam offered. "You said you didn't want to get in trouble or bother requesting another meal."
"...Fine. Bug boy can deal with her then. I'm not letting the archer out. Or Wilson."
_________________
"I have lame-ass oatmeal and some bread. And your water," Scott said quickly a few minutes later. "Wanda, I've gotten us ten minutes, that's it. You gotta eat something."
What? What is he doing in here? Wanda slowly blinked at him, trying to get the partially swollen shut eye to focus and feeling lightheaded and very, very confused. She wasn't sure if she felt weird and sick from being hungry and dehydrated, or because someone had drugged her with something again. Probably both. "That's...yours. Isn't it?"
"Not now it isn't. Please eat. We didn't know what else to do. They won't bring us any more meals." Scott glanced nervously at the guards outside the cell; they were all watching him and Wanda closely, as if the two of them might just band together and burst out, even though he had no weapons without his Ant-Man suit and Wanda was both restrained and injured. "Wanda. You've held on a whole week. Don't give up now. Please," he said quietly.
Wanda accepted the offered water, but turned her face away when Scott offered her the food. That was not hers, she didn't want to take that when she knew there wasn't going to be enough for him too. It didn't particularly look like enough for a meal for someone her own size, let alone Scott's. Think. Calm down. I have to eat something. Scott has been getting food the whole time anyway, even if it's crap prison food with small portions. I haven't. She still felt dizzy and her left arm hurt horribly. "...Thank you," she whispered after a minute.
"I don't know if we'll be able to convince them to let us give you any more again, so please hurry up. I want to get all of this into you before those ten minutes are up. What happened after the escape fail?"
Wanda found this mildly amusing; Scott wanted to stuff the stupid food into her before the guards made him leave, but also wanted her to talk. They definitely did not have time for that. Forget about it. I need to forget that. All of it. Stop trying to remember the parts I don't and forget what I do. If I don't, I will keep thinking about it and I'll be too scared to even try to think clearly. “I can't...remember all of it. But I...I don't think I...want to."
Scott frowned, wondering what horrible things happened exactly that meant Wanda did not even remember all of it. She was clearly exhausted, there were dried tears streaking her bruised face, and she seemed to be holding herself strangely, like she didn't want to be touched. “You don't have to remember. It's okay. We just have to hang on a little longer."
But we don't even know how much longer it's going to be. Wanda didn't want to let herself lose hope after only a week; any rescue could take a long time to set up, and she knew that. But the idea that she might be trapped on the Raft for weeks or months more- and that if any rescue failed, she would never get out at all- made her want to sink through the floor into the ocean and then drag the whole damn prison down with her. I'm not scared of dying, but I want to go out on my own terms. Not here, not like this. "I hate Ross," she whispered vehemently, "I hate him, and Damian too. I am going to...wreck them if I...I have the chance."
"Shut up in there! No talking, witch."
Wanda's eyes glowed red, and instantly she was curled in a ball as the bit of magic use again set the collar off. Scott groaned, frustrated and all the more horrified by watching that happen up close rather than from across a table or across the whole prison aisle. "Guys, was that really necessary?!" he called.
"She did that to herself. If she talks more though, she's getting another one."
Scott squeezed the spoon in his fist, feeling more and more helpless. Precious minutes were being wasted, and while Wanda was still lying on the floor shaking again recovering from the shock, she had already opened her eyes as best she could and was clearly still angry, looking more defiant than cowed now as she stared at the guards outside the cell. "Wanda, you need to stop doing that," Scott hissed, eyeing the guards again. "Stop staring at them like that."
If I don't, I'll crumble to pieces. I don't have anything else left. Wanda didn't try to answer him, but she made no effort to protest when he helped her sit up again leaning against the cell wall.
Scott kept himself positioned so his back was to the door and he was blocking Wanda's view of the guards and vice versa. He was pretty sure something must have happened to injure Wanda's left arm, because she flinched and squeezed her eyes shut when touched. "Is your arm okay?" he asked quietly, offering more oatmeal.
No. Wanda glanced up to meet his eyes briefly but didn't answer. It wasn't like anyone could or would do anything to fix her arm here. She didn't want to make him worry more, and she didn't want those guards outside her cell to know how much her arm hurt, either. As much as she absolutely hated that straitjacket, at least it was keeping the injured arm still, anyways. She did not remember being shoved back into it completely after the long, long, interminable time trapped on that cold table alone in the silent darkness, but it was there again now all the same. Someone must have strapped her back into it before dumping her in the cell block, but she couldn't remember. Wanda wished she could ask Scott to take the thing off, but she knew it would only earn another punishment before he could help in the first place.
"What are you doing in there? Two minutes left."
"Sheesh, give us some time, will you? Ross wants all of us alive, remember. Because he likes threatening us guys with her safety. So. She needs to eat." Scott continued talking more loudly now, speaking quickly. "I mean, you do catch more flies with honey rather than vinegar. I think we should all get more and better food, and-" He began describing homecooked meals in great detail.
Wanda couldn't help finding this amusing, because Scott continued talking until he had given her all of the paltry meal and the water. It wasn't nearly enough to make up for an entire week, but it did help clear her head a little, at least. Scott even grinned at her and went on talking as he was grabbed and marched out of the cell and back across the aisle to his own.
There was a sickeningly familiar jab in her neck just below the collar, and Wanda instinctively kicked at the person hovering over her, frustrated. "I didn't even do anything!" she protested in the same vehement tone she'd used when telling Scott she hated their captors. "I hate you, I'm going to-"
Whatever threat Wanda had planned to make was cut short by another round of sizzling pain on her neck, and she crumpled onto the floor again. Stop it. I am losing it, don't be dumb, Wanda. Don't make a fuss over nothing. I am only allowed to make a scene if it literally changes nothing or will actually help. Otherwise, I need to stop it. Stop, stop, stop. Don't make it worse.
She was vaguely aware of Clint shouting to stop and leave her alone, but what difference did that make at this point? Those guards, especially Damian, would continue shocking her if they pleased, and Ross would continue dragging her back into that interrogation room. Surely he must admit sooner or later that she genuinely did not have the information he wanted, and that none of them were going to give it to him even if they did know. It was dumb and ridiculous and the same things just ran on a loop over and over.
Also, she was not going to talk about Pietro. Loathsome old Ross would have to kill her first; so there.
Tired, angry, scared. There is nothing else and it's not going to change. Whatever Wanda had been injected with was starting to muddy her thoughts already, and she closed her eyes again, struggling to focus enough to at least get an "I'm fine...please don't yell anymore," message to Clint. She knew he would not actually believe her, but I'm fine was relative, and she at least didn't feel on the verge of breaking down or panicking right now. That was...better than nothing.
It was fine.
____________
The rest of Day 8 passed in a gloomy sort of haze. At least no one came back to take her into that interrogation room again, and the substance she'd been drugged with didn't knock her out entirely. It just made her sluggish and drowsy and made it difficult to focus properly on anything. The others were talking, but the words weren't processing easily, as if her English language skills had deteriorated or something. But she could at least hear them talking, and that was something. Being left strapped to that metal table in the interrogation room in the dark where she couldn't hear or see anything had disturbed her more than she wanted to admit. It was lonely and terrifying, disturbing in a way that was unfamiliar and just...disorienting. If she hadn't at least been able to reach out mentally to Hawkeye successfully, Wanda wasn't sure what else would have happened.
And, it was strangely worse than anything that had happened to her while she was with Hydra, because unlike the poorly regulated painful experiments that at least had some sort of understandable purpose behind them in some way, even if it didn't work, this had just been seemingly designed purely to unnerve and scare her, nothing else. I can't let it get to me. It already did. No, it hasn't. I'm fine. I am fine, I AM FINE.
Wanda scooted herself back into the corner of her cell, staring glassy-eyed at the guards milling around and making sure to keep her bad arm toward the walls. She did not feel at all properly alert at the moment, and she was growing more and more anxious that someone else besides Scott was going to realize her arm hurt so much and target that on purpose. Even if she tried not to let anyone else know, Ross and whichever guards had stuffed her back in the straitjacket when taking her out of that interrogation room after the unsettling isolation experience definitely did know already. Think something else. I should listen. Listen to my teammates talking.
It sure seemed like there were more guards present than before, but maybe she was imagining things.
"добро сам. Добро сам. добро сам. Добро сам," she whispered to herself in Sokovian. I'm fine. I am fine. I am fine. I am fine. I have friends across the aisle. I'm not alone. Wanda closed her eyes, imagining her twin was just sitting next to her and nobody else could see him, her shoulders shaking a bit. If Pietro was here, he would tell her to pretend they were somewhere else. He would talk to her and help her calm down and not feel like she was falling into a bottomless pit of chaotic anxiety.
Someone was banging on the glass and shouting indistinctly, something about no talking permitted and she was supposed to shut up. Then she caught another comment, clearly not directed at her, nervous that their prisoner was saying some kind of spell. ...What? I don't cast spells. I don't understand. Wanda glanced up and discarded the banging as being not worth any attention; she could hear her own teammates shouting too as the too-familiar pain of being shocked tore through her again.
Finally she realized what had set this incident off a few minutes later: she had spoken Sokovian to herself out loud, and this had frightened the guards since they didn't know what she was saying. Why are they still scared now? I don't understand. Wanda decided she would just be still and quiet and try to focus on listening to her teammates talking across the aisle, but not attempt participating in any conversation herself. This would give her something to do and surely nobody was going to punish her for sitting still and doing absolutely nothing. Well, except Damian, who seemed to like setting the stupid collar off for no reason at all. The others would probably stare but otherwise ignore her. I'll wait until I don't feel so...muddled to attempt any telepathic messages any more. I don't want to somehow accidentally message someone else or accidentally read Clint's mind, because I do not have permission to do that.
Scott was talking again now, stories about Cassie. Wanda liked hearing about Cassie; the girl sounded like someone she would like to meet. Besides, Cassie was why Scott had been so concerned about getting his phone call before. Cassie was important, obviously. Also, little kids did not automatically judge you and immediately get uncomfortable. Wanda thought about when she'd met Clint's children before, shortly after Ultron when she had stayed on the Barton farm for a bit after an...incident of sorts at the Compound. Cooper and Lila had not cared at all that she barely spoke, and then when she did speak the children were fascinated with her accent...and in Lila's case, began trying to copy it, which she had found embarrassing even though she knew Lila was not picking on her at all.
I can remember Clint and Laura being mortified about that. They felt so bad! Wanda found herself smiling a tiny bit at that memory. She kept her eyes closed, wondering what Pietro would have thought if he had been able to meet the Barton children. He probably would have liked being the center of attention. And probably given Cooper and Lila speedy piggyback rides. I miss him so much. Pietro could be such a pest sometimes, always pointing out he was twelve minutes older and getting the two of them into trouble by mouthing off at people that hurt them, especially on her behalf.
Wanda thought some of that had rather rubbed off on her too, and she did not care. They were twins; of course their emotions leaked from one to the other, especially after they had their constant mental link in place because of her own enhancements. Sometimes she felt like they had always been able to read each others' minds even before that. What would Pietro think if he saw her now? Tell me I'm not alone. Please tell me I'm not alone.
You are not alone. You have people that care about you right across the aisle. You can hear them. You have more people there that care than we did before. We had nobody except us. It will be okay. See, guess you needed a whole group of friends to replace me.
I don't want to replace you! I'm so scared. I miss you.
Not literally, you big baby. You have to live for both of us. Don't go hide in your own head. Please.
I don't want to be here any more. It hurts too much. I'm so, so tired. Take me away. Please. I'd rather die. I don't want to be here. I'm supposed to be living for both of us. This isn't living. Can't I fold up now?
No. You don't want to give this Ross guy what he wants, do you? He wants you to break down. Don't. You're not alone no matter what it feels like.
"...you listening?"
"...still can't see you..."
They are concerned. You should let them know you're okay.
I'm not okay./p>
Yes, you are. You're going to survive until rescued or you plan an escape. Properly this time. Get old man Hawkeye's help, because you can talk to him. They won't see that coming.
Surviving doesn't mean I'm okay.
Right now it does. That's enough for now. Let them know you're okay. Wanda finally opened her tear-filled eyes; there were only two guards milling about in front of her cell now, and neither was Damian, nor were they even watching her now. They looked bored, actually. She assumed she had probably appeared to be sleeping or otherwise completely unaware of her surroundings, so they had stopped watching her so closely. Worried speaking randomly would startle the guards into shocking her again, she slowly began moving back to where she could see into Scott's cell across the aisle, making sure to create plenty of small rustling and thumping noises while doing so.
"What are you doing in there?" one of them demanded instantly upon hearing the noise.
Wanda considered how to react before saying simply, "You said no talking," bracing herself to receive another shock. The guard had his finger poised over his remote to the thing, but didn't press it. Thank goodness. I don't think this one is going to terrorize me with it if I don't actually do anything. “I am moving, so I can see across the aisle," she went on slowly.
"Fine."
You bet it's fine, Wanda thought, annoyed, but she kept this snarky thought to herself. Once she could see Scott again, she added, "I spoke Sokovian before. It was not a spell." Wanda sounded like she thought the guards were absolute idiots, but she kept her voice quiet.
"Attitude. Shut up."
Wanda ignored him, feeling like she had made her point already. If these two were going to shock her, they would have done so already. She rested her aching head against the wall and glanced across the aisle at Scott, who still looked extremely concerned, but he immediately perked up upon realizing she was there and listening. "I'm okay."
"I said shut up. If you talk again, you will get another shock."
Well, at least this one is giving an actual warning first, Wanda thought, but she kept quiet. Being quiet was fine; she could see Scott, she could still answer any yes or no questions, and she could message Clint telepathically if she wanted to. I think.
_________________
Day 9 also passed uneventfully with no return to the interrogation room, which made Wanda more anxious rather than less, because it did not make any sense. Maybe Ross was going easy on her for a bit after leaving her in sensory-deprived solitary for over a full day, but she didn't particularly believe or trust that, not when she was being kept vaguely sedated. Whatever it was wasn't enough to knock her out, but she constantly felt sluggish and drowsy without actually being asleep or unconscious. Not a nice combination combined with frayed nerves rubbed raw and ready to snap at any provocation. He was probably purposely trying to make her and her teammates more anxious by not following routine, she decided. It seemed Sam's comments about the lack of food had helped a tiny bit, because now she was at least getting a tumbler of watery soup along with the normal water.
This was definitely not the worst thing Wanda had eaten, not by a long shot, considering some of the things she and Pietro had scavenged as children, but still. Well, at least if they are all going to still be scared of me, nobody is going to stuff food down my throat, either, she thought gloomily. That was the only good thing about this situation. They threaten me from outside the cell and set my collar off all the time, but they also hate being anywhere near me. Even when she'd been in the interrogation room all those times before, other than a few slaps, she was quite sure none of her tormentors had laid a hand on her at all, not while she was conscious, besides that. They set the collar off repeatedly and normally used some other item for hurting her instead. They never actually touched her except when administering those mysterious drug injections, when they always pulled her hair. It was an odd disconnect.
Anyway, if she could not find a way to stop herself from being drugged all the time, she would never have any remote chance at all to try planning another escape attempt. Disturbing stint isolated in the dark or not, Wanda was not one bit sorry she had at least tried.
She only wished she had tried sooner.
The problem was the more time that went by, the more she could feel herself deteriorating. Every day that passed meant there was less and less chance of anything actually working. She could grab one person to mind-control them again, sure, but she wouldn't even make it out of her cell before another guard realized what she was up to, reactivated her collar, and immediately shocked her to unconsciousness. That was a pointless endeavor. Wanda would need to get someone to disable the collar and then keep it deactivated long enough for her to get out of the straitjacket and rip the collar off herself with her magic so no one could turn it back on again. That, she had decided, was where she'd messed up on the failed attempt. I should have done that first rather than focusing on any of the men in that room. They would have been little threat to me without that, and I was scared and jumped to thinking I needed to neutralize them first.
She also remembered now Clint telling her back on the trip here that the thing was not coming off her neck, period, unless someone actually broke it entirely. Merely unlocking it would not be enough. Therefore, she needed to do it herself. Even the stupid straitjacket was not really the problem, because if that painful collar wasn't clamped around her neck, she was confident she could break out of the jacket easily, even now with a badly injured arm and feeling weak and dazed. She just wouldn't be able to use her left arm for anything, and it would make it much more difficult to actually fight her way out, because not only was the pain severely distracting, she would only have one usable hand to defend herself with. Well, and her mind. She could always just mind-control some guards to defend her friends and herself.
Wanda immediately felt guilty for wanting to do that.
Then there was the problem that even if all of that was successful and she was able to free herself and get the others out of their cells quickly, they had no way off the Raft. And unless they could locate all the Avengers gear, which could have been destroyed for all she knew (but probably not, because the government would want to steal it, she thought), all four of them would have a severe lack of weapons. They would have...an exhausted, dizzy, injured enhanced, and nothing else. Wanda knew her teammates were all much, much better at fighting in close quarters unarmed than herself-and, ignoring her own enhancements, they were all physically stronger, too, even if she was healthy and uninjured-but that wouldn't be enough to get past an entire prison's worth of armed staff. And she was not sure she really had enough strength at this point to walk much of any distance, let alone run or fight back.
Still, if she had someone else to help plan, maybe they could come up with something...
”I want to...plan another...escape."
The steely telepathic words made Clint start pacing in his cell. "Scott, what's Wanda doing now? Is she okay?"
"She's just sitting there slumped against the wall. They drugged her again, but..." Scott trailed off. "She's not fine, but she seems the same as usual. Wanda, you doing okay?"
Wanda slowly nodded, trying to reassure Scott that yes, she was okay-Raft version, I am surviving fine, she thought-but that she wasn't going to risk talking anymore. Not when she had such limited energy and ability to focus. She wished she'd asked Scott if it was okay to telepathically message him; there had even been a chance for her to whisper that because he'd been inside her cell briefly to give her that food the day before. Too late now.
"She nodded," Scott reported.
"Thanks for updating us," Clint answered, and continued pacing. "Glad you're awake, kid." He did not want Wanda planning another escape attempt at this point. There was so, so little chance of it working and he didn't think it was worth the risk. All of them were running on too-little sleep, especially Wanda, who woke up many times every night as her magic reacted subconsciously while she was asleep and then the collar would go off and wake her up yelping or crying. The constant harsh lighting also didn't help matters either. Clint had taken to simply putting an arm over his face or pulling his shirt over his head at night to help block it out, and he figured Sam and Scott were probably doing the same. But the cell block was cold, not to a dangerous level, just barely enough to make it uncomfortable, so this didn't completely fix the poor sleep issue, either. Obviously across the aisle Wanda could not do anything about the annoying lights either, not with her arms constrained in that straitjacket.
Still, if this tentative planning was something that was helping his antsy, traumatized younger teammate cope with terrible prison conditions, he didn't want to take that away from Wanda, either. At least if he tried to help, he could maybe prevent her from attempting anything else extremely risky without discussing detailed plans first. Clint had seen quite enough of Wanda to know that the longer they remained trapped on the Raft, she would probably start behaving more recklessly rather than less, until she ran herself into the ground and was physically incapable of doing anything. A pissed, badly hurt, frightened Wanda was not a good thing for anyone involved. That was like antagonizing a wounded bear or poking a wasp nest.
Wanda attempted the same opening mental channel but not replying maneuver that she had been doing while trapped in isolation, finally successfully receiving the information that Clint thought planning a new escape attempt was a bad idea but he was happy to help, and what was she thinking to do now. ”I don't know. I can't just...do nothing. I feel like...I will snap. Explode. I am lonely. I want out. Need to...do something. And I can't."
Wanda heard something slam a wall across the aisle, and she wondered if Clint had punched a wall again. Keeping her eyes closed, she hesitantly waited for another reply. This time all she received was a mentally loud YOU ARE NOT ALONE. She pulled her legs as close as she could, scrunching herself into a ball. "I know. You sound like...Pietro. I spoke to him." Then, realizing that probably sounded a bit unhinged, because she knew quite well her dead twin wasn't there and she'd been retreating into her own thoughts and pretending Pietro was there talking to her in an effort to comfort herself, she added firmly, "I know...he's not...here."
They did not come up with any kind of viable escape plan-as Clint pointed out, anything they might come up with was pointless without a plan to actually get off the Raft entirely, and they could not produce an aircraft out of thin air-but Wanda felt a bit better anyway once she grew too tired to continue focusing on her powers anymore. She stayed curled up in a ball where she was and eventually dozed off for a bit.
______________
On Day 10, the repetitive interrogation routine started again. Sam was there, Sam remained silent, as he had before, but Wanda had had enough at this point and didn't feel she could stay quiet without crying. And I would rather speak up and get into trouble than cry.
"Keep going and I will mind-control a guard again. Maybe...I will do it to you."
"You are wasting your time. Maybe you should just jump to leaving me here alone in the dark again."
"I am going to rip you apart when I get out of here."
"Stupidity is repeating the same thing over and over and expecting different results. I wonder what these repeating questions must mean then."
After this sort of thing where Ross went went on with his same old questions, Wanda shot back replies in a progressively snappier tone, and then was shocked or otherwise hurt for it, went on for a good twenty or thirty minutes if Sam had to guess, he stared at her and finally said, "Wanda, what are you doing?"
I don't know. Keeping myself sane. Wanda glanced at Sam, surprised he had spoken at all, and said in a deceptively calm voice despite her ragged, stressed breathing, "He...said...talk. I am talking."
Sam privately thought Wanda was making things worse, but also knew she was antagonizing Ross on purpose because it made her feel better to snap at him.
"He speaks," Ross said now.
Not to you, Sam thought, and kept his gaze on Wanda, whose eyes had latched onto a seemingly plain manila folder. Whatever it was appeared to be something Wanda already knew the contents of, and whatever it was scared her, because she abruptly squeezed her eyes shut and refused to open them no matter what.
Those are the Lagos photos. I won't look at them again. I won't.
The next few days passed much the same, though the teammate she found in the interrogation room while she was there too varied. Ross did not have her dragged back in there alone at all, for which Wanda was very grateful. He seemed to have begun ignoring her while he questioned the others and didn't direct any questions to her at all anymore. In fact, it seemed he was purely using her to threaten her teammates at this point. She much preferred when one of the others was in there too, especially Scott because chances were she would not receive nearly as many shocks when it was him. Sam's silence made her jumpy and want to fill the shouting with some sort of comeback, and, well...whatever Clint's training to deal with interrogation or torture was, it was clearly not helping either of them. The times Hawkeye was in there with her, he snapped at Ross multiple times too. He especially snapped when he realized she could no longer talk much at this point.
Outside of those sessions, Wanda spent most of the time lying in her cell where she could see Scott, who periodically relayed yes or no responses to any questions from the others, though she did not try speaking out loud anymore. Wanda tried to continue planning a new escape attempt with Clint via her telepathic messages, but it was getting progressively harder and harder to actually...do so. The magic seemed to have retreated into a sad, frightened chaotic mess in her chest, and while she thought it was probably indirectly trying to protect her, it hurt to yank any bits of energy free.
This actually bothered her much more than the ongoing pain from her arm, neck, ribs, and everything else. Without the ability to continue using that telepathic connection, she would not have any way to talk to anyone at all as long as they were stuck in the Raft. And the more days that crawled by, the harder it was becoming to trust that Cap would find a way to rescue them.
There was also the one comment that had burrowed its way into her head and wouldn't go away. If Cap had not told her the plan for where he was going after the airport fight, then he must consider her untrustworthy. After all, she had started out fighting against the Avengers in the first place. She didn't belong with them anyway, they should have just sent her back to Sokovia and dumped her in the rubble there. They did not trust her and never would, would they? Wanda did not give a single whit of care about most of the abusive words Ross threw at her; he could hate her til kingdom come and she didn't care, because his opinions were worth nothing to her. But that...that particular comment, and those photos from Lagos, those things hurt.
That comment had also made Sam break his silence; he called Ross xenophobic, which was not a word Wanda knew, but she could make a guess from the rest of Sam's description in his reply, which was racist scumbag. Then he did not say anything else.
Forming a new escape attempt was a faraway pipe dream. It's not going to happen.
_______________
On day 17, Wanda tried to stand to get the morning water...and instantly felt so dizzy that the cell spun and she fainted, slipping clumsily and falling into a heap. She came to a few minutes later to hear multiple voices shouting. What happened? Did I pass out...?
...my ankle hurts. Different. I slipped and fell. I think I twisted it...hurt myself. I shouldn't have tried to stand. Wanda was mostly just glad she didn't seem to have hit her head too badly; the constant headache was still there, but no worse than before the incident. She was vaguely aware of her teammates asking if she was okay, but she did not know how to communicate what happened. If she spoke, one of the trigger-happy guards would shock her again, and she didn't think her voice would travel that far in the first place anymore. Wanda squeezed her eyes shut, trying to concentrate. She should get herself back to where Scott could at least see her. That wasn't far, just a couple feet. She could communicate that she was conscious, at least.
No. Drink water first. That may get taken away, and I need that to survive here. Then tell them I'm okay.
No, friends. I would be much more miserable than...already...if I didn't know I had three people still trying to help me...not lose myself. With that in mind, Wanda slowly scooted herself back to her normal position where she could see into Ant-Man's cell, ignoring any demands of what she thought she was doing. If one of those guards set the shock collar off again, then whatever at this point; it clearly had little to nothing to do with her behavior. Therefore she was not going to waste any waning energy to deign any response to maybe prevent it, when most likely someone would do that to her anyway.
"There you are! Are you...okay?" Scott asked.
Wanda just looked at him and didn’t react, not particularly wanting to move her head if she didn't have to, both because she had the headache and because every time she moved her head, it made the shock collar rub painfully against the wrecked skin beneath. I'm okay...sort of.
"Blink once for yes and twice for no." Clint's concerned voice floated over.
"Lang, what's she doing?" That was Sam, also sounding concerned.
"Um, she's just kind of lying there, but she's definitely listening to us. Right?" Scott asked hopefully.
Wanda blinked once, very slowly. Yes, I'm listening. I am here and I'm waiting, waiting, waiting for someone to come for us. Trying to believe it.
"She says yes."
Three heads in the aisle swiveled from one rogue Avenger to the other. "What are you doing in there? No talking! No other communicating with them either. You're up to something."
"Probably planning some other...escape attempt incident!"
"She's not doing anything," Clint said snappily, "and why is it fine for the rest of us to talk as much as we want and you don't even want her answering yes or no questions?"
"Rest of you can't mind-control people."
I was 'up to something' until I couldn't message Clint telepathically anymore, and I'm not sorry, either, Wanda thought, instinctively pressing herself back against the wall as two of them came into her cell. She didn't attempt resisting this time when they gave her the daily drug injection in a great big hurry as usual (because they didn't want to be near her), but she did give them a scathing death glare anyway, more to incite their fear that she might do something else 'dangerous' than anything else. That didn't protect her from being hurt, but it was at least keeping them from touching her directly. As predicted, someone set off the shock collar, but they also hightailed it out of the cell, leaving her trembling on the floor. They're gone, they're gone. It's okay.
Retreating back to imagining Pietro sitting next to her again, Wanda closed her eyes and let herself disassociate as much as possible. Your other friend will come eventually, Wanda. You will be okay. You will get out.
What if not?
I don't know. Then you'd get to see me again, yes? It's not all bad. You used to want to die to see me again. Good. You don't anymore.
Sometimes I do. I'm so tired. I feel like I'm destined to be miserable no matter what I do.
You're such a pessimist. Live and be happy once you get out of here.
I don't mind dying. That doesn't scare me. I just assumed it would happen on a mission. Like you. It would be a relief.
Your American friends will mind. They care about you.
They don't need me. I caused the Accor-no. No, I couldn't have. I know this, but...what if they want to send me back? Wanda stayed very still otherwise, but she opened bleary eyes to see Scott still in her narrow viewpoint. He looked upset, and he was waving at her anyway. That man would not either want to send her back to her rubble-littered, destroyed Sokovia, where there was nothing left and there were dead parents and a flattened apartment building, no home left there for her at all. Neither would the others. That's an irrational fear, and I shouldn't let people that I know hate me stab that...that idea back into me. Stop it.
Tired. So tired.
________________
Two days later, Wanda lay in the same spot in her cell as those harsh artificial lights began blinking on and off as a deafening alarm sounded. Lights. Something is happening.
"There's been a breach! Security cams are all down!"
Notes:
I had trouble with this chapter tbh. I hope everything makes sense. Life stuck in the Raft is sucky and repetitive and I didn't particularly want to focus on the actual violence of it too much, more...the characters, you know? I like delving into my favorite characters’ minds and here it’s poor Wanda lol. It was really important to me to express her mental/emotional state declining throughout the time she’s stuck on the Raft (besides, she's also in bad physical condition at this point, nobody is going to help her until they're out, and she can't heal herself a la MoM back in this era!)...but she's not only scared/upset, she's also hurt and angry, so I really really hope all of that came through. Anyways. I did my best.
Chapter 4: Chapter 4
Summary:
In which our heroes finally escape the Raft, Wanda finally is able to get some help, and the group decides what to do next...
Notes:
I really appreciate the kudos, subscriptions, and comments thus far! Thank you so much:) I love reading the comments and any feedback on likes/dislikes/etc is very helpful.
I’m excited to share this chapter because they’ll be out of that prison finally lol. Yay.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"They're finally coming for us!" Scott crowed, realizing what was happening. "Hey, over here, you trigger-happy morons," he called. "She couldn't be doing anything to the lights even if she wanted to!"
There were four guards all crowded in front of Wanda's cell, and the lights overhead continued blinking. Wanda knew they were out there in a faraway sort of way, but she felt too hungry and weak to care at this point. If they shocked her enough, maybe she would pass out again and get a respite from the current situation. I'm probably dreaming. If they were coming, they would have gotten here already.
"Whatever you're doing, stop immediately!"
"Turn the alarm off!"
"What the hell is she doing to the lights?!"
"I don't know, but make her stop!"
Wanda continued lying on the floor unmoving. There's no point in trying to explain. I can't, anyways. Predictably the familiar sizzling pain ripped through her battered body again, and she finally registered that these idiots all thought she was the one causing the ruckus. Those illogical people, including Damian, were still scared of her, even now when she was barely conscious. One more hit and she thankfully passed into oblivion, vaguely hearing fighting sounds and the others shouting in the distance.
"Sure took you long enough!" Clint said upon seeing Steve.
"Miss me?"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get Wanda out first," Clint ordered. If this rescue did go sideways, he wanted to make sure Cap at least got Wanda out. He was not concerned about Sam, Scott, or himself staying alive imprisoned on the Raft, at least. Steve could always just get Wanda somewhere safe to recover and then return a second time for the others.
Steve nodded. "Nat's right behind me; her job was collecting your gear and any security cam footage we can get. Honestly for one of the highest security prisons on the planet, they're understaffed. Where is Wanda?"
"Across from us, where you knocked out those guards," Scott called. "Hurry up, Captain America, before they all wake up. And just...be careful with her."
Steve took a key card from one of the unconscious guards and quickly opened Wanda's cell. Wanda remained lying motionless on the floor, her tangled brown hair hiding most of her face, and didn't react at all. "Hey, kid, we're here to break you out. Finally. Sorry it took so long," he said quietly.
I must be imagining him, Wanda thought, but there was someone gently sitting her up. No one treated her like that here; there was no touching at all other than someone's hand roughly grabbing her hair and injecting things into her neck or something. Wanda blinked slowly, her head drooping forward as much as the thick collar would let her. The someone was loosening the straps on the straitjacket, enough that it made her injured arm shift against her torso. She made a quiet pained noise and tried to pull away. Stop, please stop. It's making it hurt worse. Wait. I should scare them away. I don't want anyone touching me. Go away. The magic stirred a tiny bit and then retreated back into her heart, locked in. The magic was sad and depressed, and it hurt too.
"Can you look at me? I'm trying to help. Not hurt you, I promise. We need to hurry." Steve sounded both concerned and matter-of-fact, but then he frowned at the half-conscious death glare Wanda threw at him. It was like she did not recognize him and thought someone was there to hurt her instead, so she wanted to attempt scaring him away.
Steve did not find that expression very scary; she reminded him of the injured kitten he had found and nursed back to health as a kid back in the thirties. The kitten had tried to bite and scratch because it was scared, though it finally warmed up to people and grew cuddly later.
"Wanda. It's Steve Rogers. Captain America, remember? I'll get you out of here." Though originally he and Nat weren't sure how much use any security footage they could get ahold of would be as evidence, and therefore questionable whether they should waste precious minutes trying to get it, seeing Wanda's poor condition now seemed to be evidence enough that the footage probably would be useful for them later.
Not imagining things. The defensive death glare vanished. Wanda did think she could trust him not to hurt her, but she couldn't explain verbally right now because her throat hurt too much and she rather wished she would just fade away and not wake up again.
"Okay, so I'm going to get this thing and that collar off you. Then we will go patch you up in the quinjet," Steve said next. "Do you understand what's happening?"
Wanda's eyes fluttered shut again, but she was able to nod a tiny bit. The nightmare will end, if we can actually get out of here. Maybe he should leave me behind. I can't run. I'm so hungry and I miss Pietro. She felt her good arm fall free, and she instinctively reached for the injured one that genuinely made her want to cry, not wanting it to be touched.
Steve did not know what exactly was wrong, but he could tell enough to know that Wanda's arm must be hurting her badly and that she didn't want anyone messing with it. "I won't touch it. Let's just get out of here then."
"Good grief, I've gotten the gear, well...what was there, some of it is damaged, and sent the footage I could get to the ship. What's taking so-oh." Natasha cut herself off when she saw her youngest teammate lying in Steve's arms. Wanda clearly recognized her, but that was the only good thing. She looked like all the life had been drained out of her. Visible injuries were one thing, and Nat had known that they would find her injured, but this was different. She'd seen Wanda hurt plenty of times before, but she hadn't seen that haunted look in Wanda's eyes since the first few weeks after Ultron. "Just get that damn collar off her. Leave the rest alone until we're safe. Those guards won't stay knocked out and locked on another level forever. Hey, Wanda. We'll all be out soon." Natasha quickly swiped another key card and opened the rest of the team's cells.
Why is Nat here? She was on the other side of the battle, Wanda thought, but didn't particularly question it further. There was an unpleasant but brief stab of further pain on her neck, and something clattered to the floor in two pieces. It's gone. The thing is finally gone. She could finally move her head without that horrid collar rubbing her already damaged, burned skin more and more raw. Wanda felt herself being picked up, which also hurt, but she felt safe held in Steve's arms, and hid her face in his big shoulder. Thank you, thank you, thank you, she thought in relief.
"Everyone else good to go?" Steve looked around their little group of fugitives; no one else appeared much injured aside from some minor cuts and bruises. The most obvious was a black eye on Sam. "All right, Nat, you lead the way. Scott, Sam, you carry the gear, except Clint's bow and arrow, which we may need. Clint, you bring up the rear and knock out any stragglers if necessary."
"...Me?" Do I have a job too? Wanda's tiny voice made Cap hold her tighter.
"Your job is resting now. We'll get you out," Steve said firmly.
I...want to help. I probably can't. Wanda knew there was something very wrong with her magic now; ever since the day her arm was injured, it seemed to be retreating farther and farther away from her, and now it was just a tiny, sad, chaotic ball of pain and anxiety hiding in her chest. It did not want to come out, it was terrified, but she also felt it was just trying to protect her from any more pain at this point. All of the power was still there, but it didn't feel right, either. If I can't, I am useless. Why did I even ask if I could do something?
"If we find Damian or Ross, maybe you can give them nightmares, or chuck 'em in a cell," Clint suggested. He was happy to see that this got Wanda's attention; she did not smile like she might have weeks ago at the idea, but she was clearly listening, her dazed green eyes a little more focused than before.
They were moving now, and Wanda watched their surroundings from her spot safe in Steve's arms. It seemed suspicious that they were only running into a few guards, all quickly dispatched via Natasha's widow's bites without even needing arrow backup from Hawkeye, but maybe their rescuers had already neutralized the others. Still, it felt wrong to be simply walking out of what was supposed to be a max security prison for villainous enhanced. Wanda hesitantly reached for her magic inside, disliking this immensely. I want to be ready. Something doesn't seem right. Maybe I am just...overthinking this, but... There were only six of them against the entire Raft personnel, and only two were ready to fight. Scott and Sam were carrying the damaged gear, Steve was carrying her, and she knew she was not in any condition to fight herself now. That left only Clint and Nat.
"Is it just me or does this prison break seem too simple?" Scott asked. "Like. Max security prison for enhanced people, in the middle of the ocean, and we're just walking out."
"Don't jinx us, Lang!" Sam sounded amused now, but privately he did kind of agree.
"That's part of why it took so long for us to come. Had to have detailed plans set to go," Steve said. They all piled into an elevator leading to the surface uneventfully, but then he felt Wanda tense in his arms. "Do you sense something?"
I don't know, but something isn't right. Wanda was not sure whether she actually sensed people on the other side of the elevator door, or if she was just being paranoid and her magic-gone-haywire was merely sensing the team and herself. "Not...sure," she whispered.
"Let's switch here just in case. Sam, Scott, one of you take her. Leave the gear behind if we have to. The important thing is getting all of us out safely."
Scott instantly dumped his armful of gear on the floor before anyone else could react. "Give her to me. I'll carry her." Wanda was a tiny bit frustrated at being passed about, and besides, it made everything hurt more, but she still just felt safe now, even though she knew they were still within the prison. Scott was clumsier than Steve, but he was still being gentle. "You remind me of Cassie," he was saying now, "you're just like a much bigger version of her."
What? He...what? Wanda thought this was an absolutely lovely compliment, even if she still didn't particularly like being the 'kid' of the group. Scott had talked so much about little Cassie throughout their time trapped in the Raft that she felt a bit like she knew the child already.
The elevator halted at the surface as planned, doors sliding open to reveal Ross and about fifteen or so armed guards behind him. "Surrender now or we will be forced to open fire."
"Stand down. No one else needs to be harmed today, Ross," Natasha countered. "You don't need to do this."
Ross's gaze flicked to Wanda briefly; she no longer had the shock collar clamped around her neck, but she also appeared to be unconscious in Scott's arms. "I think not. Surrender Maximoff and reveal the Winter Soldier's whereabouts and the rest of you can go."
"Not an option. Move or we go through you."
"Tell him...yes," Wanda whispered to Scott. I don't have much power access right now, but surely I can do something. And he is lying anyway. Even if they did leave me behind and say where Steve's friend is, he wouldn't let everyone else walk out of here. She thought she could yank enough power free to mind-control Ross into letting them walk, but as weak as she was right now, she was sure she needed to be right next to him to attempt it.
"Absolutely not," Scott hissed back.
"Pretend," Wanda insisted. She let her eyes flick to Clint, hoping he would understand what she wanted.
Clint kept his stun arrow aimed at Ross, but glanced at Wanda, fairly certain he knew what this unexplained plan of hers was. "Kid, you haven't talked telepathically to me at all in days, and I know it's not because you didn't want to. Whatever you're thinking, that's extremely risky. Bad plan."
"The girl isn't unconscious, she's awake, boss!" someone shouted.
Shield, shield, shield, Wanda's fuzzy mind screamed at her, and in a second her good hand whipped out, ripping a wisp of scarlet free from its mental prison inside, and a crackly red shield formed across the open doors just in time as they heard gunfire from outside the elevator. I can't hold this for long.
"Nat, you got any more of those smoke bombs?" Clint asked. "They're not going to just file in and let us knock them out one by one. Second Wanda's shield goes, we need a way to get through those guys. Fast. She's not going to be able to keep that up much longer." Already the scarlet shield was flickering.
"Four. It's raining, so visibility will be bad, which is good for us. Everyone to the sides. They'll start unloading their magazines. We run when there's a pause for them to reload. There are sixteen plus Ross. Counted while we were talking. We can handle that no problem." Natasha glanced at Wanda and added in a softer tone, "You can drop it now, you've done enough."
Wanda's eyes stayed screwed shut, but she listened and released her shaky hold on the shield, which instantly fizzled to nothing. Whatever had given her a bit of strength to produce that shield seemed to fade too, along with being able to actually focus on what was going on. There was noise, so much noise, and then running, running, running. Scott was saying something about there being too much smoke and he was very sorry for jostling her around. It's fine, it's fine, we are out of there and it's raining and I would much rather die than go back in there again, Wanda thought. She heard a pained grunt and her eyes flew open again. "What..."
Rain. Pouring rain, drenching them, and she could feel Scott flagging and not moving as quickly. He's hit. Someone hit him in this mess. They were out of the range of the smoke bomb now, so anyone could see them. And where was the quinjet? Maybe it was in stealth mode or something, but she didn't see it. Or, I just can't see it from here... "Where..."
"Don't worry, we'll make it," Scott said firmly. "It's okay, don't try to talk anymore. Look, there's Black Widow. I'm going to give you to her, okay? I'm good, but I don't want to risk dropping you if I can help it. You...already knew I'd been hit, didn't you."
Wanda blinked and nodded a little. This was okay. Scott did not look frightened or particularly hurt, he just didn't trust himself to carry her anymore. Something yanked her away from him, and she yelped in pain. Now what? No, that's Damian.
"Finally. Found you. Took long enough. You're dead the second-"
Without waiting for one of her teammates to help instead, or thinking beyond the instinctive vehement hatred and fear the man inspired in her, she twisted her good arm around, eyes glowing red, and slammed her bare hand into his head, pouring whatever bits of mind mojo into him she could muster. You will help us, you will defend us, you will never tell Ross of this. You will help us, and you will apologize to...to my friends. You will defend us with your life if necessary. You will do this for twelve hours, and-
Scott was still staring in surprise when Wanda fell limp and unconscious with Damian still hanging onto her. The whole thing had happened so fast; one second he was trying to tell Wanda something and the next Damian had yanked her away from him, and the girl was slamming magic into her tormentor's head, eyes tinged red. "Uh...backup here!" he yelled finally.
"I will help you. I will defend you. I will never tell Ross of this. I will-"
"Okay, if you want to help, just hand Wanda over," Natasha said abruptly. It was exceedingly obvious that Wanda had mind-controlled the man, but overextended herself badly doing so.
"Sure." Damian willingly handed Wanda over, no longer repeating the instructions he'd been given, and Natasha felt like this was too good to be that easy.
"Now...go distract any remaining guards," Nat ordered, half doubting he would actually listen. "Scott, get yourself to the jet. I've got her now." Wanda remained dead weight in Natasha's arms, her breathing ragged, as if she had been running for far too long rather than simply unleashing magic into a man's head while she was injured and barely conscious herself.
"Yes, Black Widow. I apologize. I also apologize to the rest of her friends," said Damian, sounding quite sincere, if also robotic about it. "Is the witch girl okay?"
"No thanks to you." Natasha raised an eyebrow and backed toward the quinjet. Most of the other guards had already been neutralized, but she didn't want to risk being caught in the open while carrying Wanda. That would just get both of them into trouble.
Scott stared at Damian some more. Wanda had...forced that man to help them and apologize? He had not seen Wanda's mind manipulation in action before, and it would have been a little disturbing to watch to him if it wasn't on a man he despised. As it was, it was rather satisfying to see Damian, who had been utterly hateful and cruel the entirety of their time stuck on the Raft, now falling all over himself to apologize and help them.
Hawkeye glanced from Natasha and Wanda to mind-controlled Damian and back again. "Best thing I've seen in ages! Let's get out of here. See ya, Damian. Hope you have a day as nice as you are."
"Everyone here and accounted for?" Steve asked a few minutes later. There was loud shouting from outside the quinjet, and Clint glanced out a window. Damian was gesturing wildly, saying something that they should go inside because the Avengers were gone already.
"We're good. Just Damian helping. Looks like there are a couple guards still standing besides all the ones we knocked out to get here safely, but they look baffled. Definitely the best thing I've seen on the Raft, by far," Clint said, guffawing. "That man deserves a lot worse than being made to help us. I'm glad Wanda did that. Oh, will you look at that. He punched Ross. What a shame." He sounded greatly entertained by this. "Is Wanda awake yet? She should see this!"
"No, because she knocked herself out doing that. I wish she hadn't, especially considering Scott and I were right there," Nat countered, but still, they were out, they were safe-as safe as six international fugitives could be, anyway-and everyone was alive.
"Goodbye to that hellhole!" Scott shouted as the quinjet took off. "Do we have a plan for what we all do next?"
"Of course," Steve called from the cockpit. "Everything is ready to go; we should be fine, at least for awhile."
"First order of business is patching anyone up that needs patching up. Then we discuss the plan," Natasha said firmly. "Scott, you are dripping blood on the floor. Sam, take care of him while I'm taking care of Wanda. Clint, if you're good, I need your help."
Wanda still lay unconscious across the row of padded seats where Natasha had set her down, her stressed breathing already having evened out mostly. "When Tony said she was taking heat off the rest of you and the Raft was being unfair to her, that was a major understatement," Natasha muttered. "I knew we'd find her injured, just...not like this. Grab the rest of the supplies, will you, Clint? Get everything that Sam isn't using. We should have anything we might need. Let's get some IV fluids into her first and then we'll see what else is wrong."
"Tony said that? He sure didn't seem apologetic when he came around the Raft. The guy doesn't even like her. The hell did Stark Industries create that shock collar for then?" Clint sounded absolutely pissed as he carried the supplies over. "I don't think she's going to like waking up to find something in her arm, Nat."
"She looks dehydrated and starved, and she can't drink anything while she's unconscious. She'll understand. He does stupid experiments and then feels guilty about it. Ross might've realized Tony wasn't so in his pocket as he thought if he was apologetic during his visit. Tony might not trust Wanda, but he definitely didn't want her to be tortured, either." Nat carefully freed Wanda's other arm and pulled the straitjacket the rest of the way off, leaving her in the t-shirt-like prison top underneath. Wanda didn't react, even though moving her injured arm must have hurt. "Do you know how long her arm has been like this? It...doesn't look good."
Clint sighed. "There's a portable scanner in here too. Day 6, so...two weeks, I guess," he said quietly. "As far as I know, something happened where they wanted to force her to locate Steve and Bucky with her power, but instead of doing so, staying silent, or saying a flat no, she lied and said yes. However, she mind-controlled a guard into disabling that collar instead and was able to get her hand free afterwards. She put another guard to sleep and threw two more into a wall before Ross realized what she was doing and...did that to her. She also, ah, accidentally shared her own pain a couple times afterwards, so from that I think her elbow is dislocated at best. And don't tell her she did that to me, because I don't think she knows and I don't want her to know."
Natasha looked at him curiously; that was a rather unpleasant thing to consider happening. If Wanda did that again by accident while they were on the run, the whole group would be in trouble... "Good on her for trying, though I suppose a failed escape attempt probably made things worse." Natasha rather wondered what in the world Ross and anyone else in the Raft had been thinking. Of course Wanda had lied and turned on her captors. Even in the midst of the escape, where everyone knew Wanda could not get out on her own at all, weaselly Ross had still been eyeing her as a threat, so he should have considered that perhaps torturing her but then attempting to force her to use her power for him was a ridiculous plan. "Idiots, the whole lot. The hell did they think she was going to do, break and help them willingly? How was she supposed to even try something on that scale with that torture device on her neck anyway?"
"Wanda can't track people over a great distance like that anyway, forget someone trying to force her to do it under duress," Clint pointed out. "And hey, if she'd pulled the escape attempt at the start, it may have worked. I doubt running on nothing but water and being tortured for days beforehand made it easy for her to use her power properly and conduct a breakout very well."
"I mean, she also might be able to and not know how," Scott called from where Sam was patching up his arm. "She did mind-control a man to the complete opposite of his natural behavior while being barely conscious herself, let alone able to use her power easily. So."
"She never uses her mind tricks since the team all agreed she shouldn't, including her, so there's no way anyone knows what that aspect of her power can do one way or the other." Sam sighed and gave Scott a little push. "Okay, you're done, tic-tac."
Steve ducked in from the cockpit, saying the coordinates were set for the autopilot. "Status reports on everyone?"
"Nothing worse than bruises and minor cuts, except Scott got himself shot in the arm, which doesn’t seem too serious, and there's...Wanda," Clint informed him. The longer they were away from the Raft, the grumpier he was becoming. Nineteen days was not forever, and he knew quite well it could take a long, long time to organize an escape route AND have plans for afterward, but none of this would have happened at all if it weren't for the Accords and then half their team signing them in the first place.
"Is she okay?"
"No, Cap, she's not okay. Those assholes treated her like shit the entire time we were imprisoned, do you understand? You found her in there. Do you really think she's okay?"
"Of course not. Is it realistic for us to be able to take care of her with no access to hospitals," Steve clarified.
"We can, because we do have access to plenty of supplies between here aboard the jet and the safe houses. So yes, I think she'll be okay," Natasha said firmly. "The worst of it is her arm and neck, obviously. That and she's malnourished. I imagine she's going to feel stiff and achy for a long time from being restrained like that for weeks, but once we get settled, she can just rest. The scanner also picked up a couple broken ribs, a sprained ankle, and that wound on her leg. All the rest of it is more or less superficial; she doesn't seem to be sick or have any other internal injuries, surprisingly. We'll keep her safe."
"What about the fact that her arm sat untreated for two weeks, Nat?" Clint asked roughly. "That's going to heal properly too?"
Natasha glanced back at Wanda, who just looked like she was sleeping now. "We won't know that right away. You know that," she said quietly. "That's the same as if we did have access to any hospitals."
"Yeah, well, a real doctor might have done a better job putting a dislocation back in place and splinting a minor fracture than we did."
"She's going to be fine," Sam put in. "If it doesn't heal right, it doesn't heal right. We can't take her anywhere else, and she's safe. Better an imperfect job than risk getting her sent right back to that prison again. Clint, look. Look at her. Does she look upset right now?"
"...No." Clint did recognize this much; Wanda might not have regained consciousness yet, but she appeared relaxed, and her breathing was calm and steady.
"She's going to be fine. Do you think she would rather inexpert friends keep her safe and maybe risk an injury healing poorly, or take her to a hospital and definitely risk getting dumped right back into that prison?"
The former. Clint sighed and stared out the window.
________
Wanda came to awhile later to familiar voices chattering nearby. First she thought it was just her fellow teammates trapped in the Raft with her, but they sounded closer than normal. Also, whatever she was lying on now was much softer and warmer than the seemingly freezing cold floor in that cell. The escape. I am not in there anymore. Nat and Steve rescued us. Now that any adrenaline from the escape had worn off, her body blazed with pain again anew, but she also felt a bit better than before somehow. Wanda experimentally wiggled her fingers and toes; everything ached and felt incredibly stiff, but not quite as badly as she expected, either.
I can move. I am not tied up any more. I can touch things, my fingers aren't numb and...stuck anymore either.
The only thing that felt alarming to her was not being able to move her left arm aside from twitching her fingers, but trying sent fresh flashes of pain up her elbow and maybe it was a bad idea to try anyways. Wanda's eyes flew open when she sensed something still on her neck and her fingers flew there trying to get the something off. She did not want anything on her neck again, never, ever. Tears pooled in her eyes, terrified that collar was somehow back on her, even though she could remember Steve breaking the distasteful thing off.
There was a gentle but firm hold on her hand suddenly, and Wanda saw Nat next to her. Stop crying, don't panic. It's fine, I am not there anymore. Nat wouldn't have put that thing back on me.
...but a member of the team made it. Maybe they all knew. Maybe it was an emergency measure. You're still the WMD nobody thinks is a person. No. Wrong. I wouldn't be here now if that was true. They could have left me behind or killed me.
"You have some nasty burns on your neck. Clint and I bandaged them up. There is no collar, Wanda, I promise. I know it still hurts, but that thing is not there anymore. Nobody is going to put that back on you again, I promise." Natasha released her hand once Wanda seemed to understand; the girl was clearly still frightened, but not panicky. "Do you know where we are now?"
Q-U-I-N-J-E-T, Wanda signed shakily. S-A-F-E? A questioning look accompanied the second word, and her hand dropped back to the blanket. Blanket? Where did a nice fleecy blanket come from? It feels nice. That's why I'm not cold. Is everyone out? I think so, but I don't remember anything after...whatever I did to Damian. She could see Scott drinking a juice box, and she wanted something too. And something besides water. Hungry, thirsty, tired, tired, tired.
"Everyone is safe. See, look." Natasha didn't let her try to sit up on her own, but she did slide a few pillows behind her so Wanda was propped up somewhat leaning against the window, her legs still stretched across the seat row. This felt much better and Wanda thought she was too exhausted to care to wonder why there were a bunch of pillows in the quinjet. There was some complicated-looking black splint thing encasing her left arm shoulder to palm, holding it still. That explained why she couldn't move it.
O-F-F, Wanda signed again, not bothering to lift her hand to do so this time.
"No, you can't take that off, either. It needs to heal. Don't rip the IV out, either. It's not any kind of drug, just fluids because we know you're dehydrated. I'll take it out once that bag is finished and you eat something and keep it down. You're benched for now. Do you want chocolate pudding, banana pudding, or applesauce?"
Wanda glanced down at the IV in her good arm. This did not hurt, but she didn't want it there all the same. Needles made her nervous; they always contained unknown drug things forced on her. That happened with Hydra and then it happened on the Raft, too. Nat wouldn't lie to me. If she says it's not some weird drug, then it isn't. I need to...calm down. Stop thinking everything is somehow bad and going to hurt me. Stop it. She looked around the interior of the jet curiously; Sam and Steve both appeared to be asleep, Scott was still eating and drinking the juice box but gave her a smile, and Clint was staring out a window next to her looking rather pissed. Wanda wanted to ask how and why Natasha was here helping them at all, because she'd been on the other side of the airport battle before, but Wanda supposed it did not matter why. Certainly Nat wouldn't have helped with the Raft breakout if she wanted to send them right back there, right? The quinjet must be on autopilot, she decided. Finally she focused back on Natasha and pointed at the chocolate pudding cup. Chocolate reminded her of Pietro, because he loved it and would be so pleased whenever he got some. He always shared it with me too, she thought.
Scott ambled over and sat on the floor beside her. "You made that Damian dude help us, you know," he said, clearly pleased and entertained by this.
"Best thing on the Raft, period," Clint added, still staring out the window. "You missed him punching Ross after we boarded the jet."
I didn't know what else to do, I hate him, and he...scared me. I'm only sorry I couldn't do it sooner. Maybe Scott wouldn't have gotten hurt then. Wanda wasn't quite sure how she should react to that. In the moment she had not even been sure how much it would work, if at all. Also, she had consciously attempted to make it only last a certain period of time, but who knew if that had been successful, either? But she was not at all sorry for messing with that man's mind, nor that he had then punched Ross, which was a rather satisfying mental picture. She sort of hoped he would get punished for helping them escape, actually, whether that was wrong of her to think or not. I need to ask Nat about it. I would trust her to be objective about whether or not I should have done that, or if I did potentially mess up and leave that hateful little man altered permanently, what repercussions might happen from that. Scott and Clint were clearly biased. That was nice that she hadn't disturbed them, but very unhelpful.
Natasha was merely watching her teammates with a mixed expression. "I don't care that you did that, because he deserved much worse, but you'd better hope it wears off. If it doesn't, we just left obvious evidence behind for Ross and his minions to use against you."
"Ross is an idiot," Scott announced.
"Yeah, an idiot with power. He's not going to think, I'll leave the rogue Avengers alone now, since they successfully escaped the Raft, including the person he considers a walking nuke. He's just going to see that Wanda destroyed one of his men's free will while barely conscious herself, and use it to tarnish her reputation and ours further." Natasha gently pressed a spoon into Wanda's hand and gave her a smile. "I'll hold the pudding cup until you're finished. Do you need help?"
Wanda blinked at Nat, feeling a bit overwhelmed. This...protective Natasha was not exactly new, because the other times Wanda had been injured on a mission, Nat became oddly protective of her then too...but it still felt strange. The Black Widow hadn't even scolded her for breaking the mutual 'no mind tricks if you're going to be an official member of the team, period' agreement. "I...used..." she shakily pointed at her friend's head. I was not supposed to do that.
"I know you did. Do you think I should be disappointed or angry about it, considering the circumstances? I don't think so."
I don't know. Wanda shakily put her spoonful of pudding in her mouth. It was absolutely delicious, even if swallowing made her throat hurt.
Natasha gently guided Wanda's hand for more pudding this time, since she seemed shaky enough to spill if she continued doing it on her own. "I think considering what I know about the Raft and how we found you in there, it would be unreasonable to be upset with you for using something to help you survive. The only thing that bothers me is that you accidentally made Clint feel your pain more than once while you were in there. Is that-"
"...What?" Wanda stared at Nat, horrified. She had done what? The only time she knew something like that had happened was when she'd been trying to figure out just how much she could communicate telepathically without setting that awful shock collar off. I didn't think I did anything like that at all since then. I promised it wouldn't happen again, too. I messed up. Again.
"Nat, I thought I specifically told you not to tell her about that, dammit," Clint snapped.
"If it's something Wanda's powers can do unintentionally and she has no idea it even happened, she needs to know about it so it doesn't occur again. I'm not upset with her, she just needs to know."
"Well, she certainly doesn't need to know right now. Maybe tell the poor kid when she can freaking feed herself without help!" Clint was extremely peevish at this point, and he knew quite well why Nat had told Wanda about it, because it would, admittedly, be very bad if the incident had a repeat performance, and she did need to know. Eventually. But he did not want her to know right now all the same.
"Maybe that is exactly why I told her now, because she's in pain and her power might want to share the burden in an effort to protect her. Do you want that to happen later when she's in public somewhere, still hiding her identity, and she accidentally shares pain with some random stranger in a grocery store and her eyes glow or something? No, we don't!" Now Natasha sounded frustrated too.
"We're alone, the only people she could subject to that is us. Heaven forbid she makes a friend know what she feels like right now. I don't even care if she does do it again. She didn't need to know right now!"
"Guys, Wanda is right here, let's not argue, please," Scott said quickly. "You're freaking her out, and you woke up Sam and Steve. Quit all the shouting."
"What is going on? We take a nap and everything falls apart in the meantime?" Steve asked.
Wanda had her eyes scrunched shut, the plastic spoon for the pudding now snapped in half and crackling with red magic on the floor. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, please stop yelling, I'm not there anymore. Stop it. A strangled "please make it stop!" finally escaped her, and made her start coughing. "...'m sorry. So s-sorry." I don't want them to fight. Didn't that happen enough already?
Those pictures from the Lagos incident that had been shown to her were branded into her head at this point. One of them had been of that injured little girl bawling and clutching the leg of an older boy. The two were standing next to a suspiciously human-shaped lump hidden beneath a tarp. A body. Maybe it wasn't those kids' parents, but certainly it was some adult they loved, and she had made a mistake and that person was dead now. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't have been dumped in the Raft, but they should have just killed me. I should have run back in the airport and let them. I should have done it myself.
The emergency hatch. She would just get to the emergency hatch and dump herself out and it would be much easier for the others to stay safely hidden on the run without her anyway. She had hurt Clint without even knowing she had done so. What kind of horrible person promised her teammates she wouldn't use her mind tricks on them or anyone else, and then made one of them be in pain just because she was hurting? Without particularly deciding to do so consciously, Wanda started trying to get up, and immediately someone was hugging her and holding her trembling body still. Natasha. Natasha was holding her, giving her a hug. What now? Just let me go, it doesn't matter. You probably should. Why does she care at all? She knows what I did. She even wanted to ask me about it and me hurting Clint disturbed her. Obviously. She won't care any more and she shouldn't.
That isn't right either, the tiny logical bit of her poked at the overwhelming guilt drowning her inside. It was Rumlow's bomb, not mine. Those poor kids would have lost someone anyway. They might have been killed too along with that person if I hadn't done anything and at least...decreased the damage. And Nat cares. She is concerned. Not angry.
The dark part of her wondered if those kids would be better off dead too, because if they were dead then they wouldn't have to be hurting because someone they loved was dead and they were still alive. Pietro would think that was absurd. When she had expressed thoughts like that to him after their parents were killed, he had been horrified and confused and didn't understand. Then he said they had to live because their parents weren't there, to live and be happy because their parents would want them to be able to do that. Pietro was always optimistic, while she was the pessimistic, realistic one.
Well, if she was always pessimistic, then maybe she would always be less likely to be disappointed or hurt. Except somehow, she always ended up disappointed or hurt or both anyway, so what was the point? Pietro isn't here. He would not want me to give up now, just because I feel terrified and guilty. I know that. And...I don't want to give people like Ross what they want. He would be delighted if I killed myself. "My power...is...broken," she forced out. There. The rest of the team did need to know that, because they didn't need a severely injured, useless person hanging around in the first place.
Natasha didn't let go of Wanda yet; her younger teammate was still shaking, and it was clear she was crying. "You're actually the only other one of us here besides Cap with built-in enhancements not involving your signature suit, weapons, or other skills. Even if your power is 'broken' somehow, which it can't be because I saw you use it, you don't need it to be a member of the team."
I don't have nearly as much training as the rest of you. I'm still just the Sokovian refugee girl with strange abilities none of us know much about. Not even me. Wanda did not say anything else aloud or attempt signing a response either, but that comment sort of made her feel better, at least. I don't want to disappoint Pietro. Don't, don't, don't do that. I have to stay here. I have to.
"You do know why I thought you should know about what Clint still thinks I shouldn't have informed you about at all, don't you?"
Wanda nodded a little as Nat settled her back against the pillows. Because I have to know about things like that whether I want to or not, to prevent it from happening again. But...I don't even know when or how it happened other than that one time.
"Not that I know much about how whatever psionic pain you made Clint feel worked, but I doubt it's in danger of happening again. You never did it to Lang or me, and you never spoke to us telepathically, either." Sam looked thoughtful, watching the group. "Therefore it has something to do with intentionally speaking to someone in that way, yes? You had enough presence of mind even after all that time on the Raft to choose not to open a mental channel of sorts on us, because you couldn't ask us for permission to do so without revealing you could access a little of your power, even in that situation. I'm guessing you already had permission from Hawkeye previously in case of emergency, so you did talk to him that way."
Wanda's pained gaze flicked to Clint, who was scowling but appeared calm now. That's true. I think.
"Is it okay if I share what I know?"
Wanda frowned at him but nodded slightly again. He should not be asking if he could share when he was the one she'd put through...whatever it was.
Clint patted her good hand before explaining. "It has something to do with Wanda's power reacting to her body being subjected to those repeated shocks. The first time, she was clearly trying to figure out how much she could project her words before setting that collar off. That, I think Wanda does know, because she apologized and it never happened again that way. She was speaking in spurts of three or four words every time she talked to me afterwards. Whatever energy from her power opening and closing that mental channel used, it was quick or small enough not to set it off, if she remained within those parameters." He paused, considering how to explain the rest without potentially sending Wanda into another crying or panicking episode. "The other times, she was trying to distract herself. A couple times the timing was such that she was messaging me simultaneously while they shocked her again. This broke the connection but sent what she was feeling for a moment as it did so. I'm not going to blame her for her power going a little haywire while she was literally being tortured. That's ridiculous. Honestly considering how freaking often they were doing that to her, she shouldn't be alive, let alone thinking and communicating clearly. I think Wanda's magic makes her sturdier than an ordinary person being subjected to that, even though it also makes that power behave strangely."
"So you were using it right under Ross's nose repeatedly and he never knew about it?" Steve asked curiously.
Y-E-S, Wanda signed, looking a tiny bit pleased. She had found that more than a bit satisfying in a twisted sort of way, especially since he had eventually ended up thinking she had passed out or gone catatonic, because she wouldn't respond, and gotten mad and hurt her again but then immediately ceased the interrogation session afterwards. P-L-A-N? I want to know what's going on before I end up passing out or falling asleep again. And... She glanced at Clint again and added, Y-O-U O-K? S-O-R-R-Y.
"Just mad as a wet hen. Of course I'm okay, you didn't give me your injuries, it just is infuriating that I knew-know-exactly what you're feeling and couldn't do a thing about it. You do know it's safe to talk now, right? You don't have to keep signing unless you want to."
Wanda considered this information; she still didn't want to talk. I do know it's safe. I don't want to explain that it hurts to speak and that part of me is scared to talk. I K-N-O-W, she settled on finally, closing tired eyes again. That was good enough.
Clint was still concerned, but decided not to press further, since it seemed likely that Wanda might be avoiding talking simply because it pained her to do so and she didn't want to admit it. If she continued not speaking even after her wrecked throat healed some, then there would be other issues, but for now he would let her be. Maybe he would teach her more signs besides the letters later, if she liked signing so much. "It would be nice to know the plan here."
"We're en route to one of Nat's safe houses in Norway," Steve explained. "So we're going to drop at least two of us there. And regroup and pick up more supplies, obviously."
"Why are we not just all staying there?" Scott asked curiously.
"Because Tony actually helped with part of this plan, and has a big rural house in upstate New York set up as...an extended summer vacation getaway of sorts temporarily, for Clint's family. There were contingencies, however, and one of them is that I don't go there. He also can't interfere if the government does catch us, though he's working on negotiating some kind of house arrest for Sam, Clint, and Scott." Steve paused before continuing, "We can't all go to New York anyway; it would be absurd to have six mismatched people that just happened to be rogue Avengers visit that vacation property."
"Buddy system is in place. We'll split up into groups eventually and stay under the radar that way, meeting up to rendezvous and check in once a week. For now, a couple of us to New York, one of whom needs to be Wanda; the rest to the Norway safe house, one of whom needs to be Steve. We have a list to work from as far as that goes and fake IDs ready to go," Natasha explained. "For now, we just need to decide who's going where."
Wanda closed her good hand into a fist; she did not trust that plan one bit and did not want to go to this vacation house at all, even if it had Laura and the children in it. Stark would probably rat her out in a second if he thought she was one of the ones hiding there. And it was too close to the Compound, if it was in upstate New York...wasn't it? Though, nobody would assume they would hide so close in the first place, either, so in an odd sort of way, it did make sense. N-O-T N-Y, she signed, clearly frustrated.
"That's ironically the safest place for you right now, Wanda. I knew you weren't going to like that plan, but there isn't another reasonably safe option until you're recovered enough to make a quick exit if necessary. Let's say we go to another safe house and get feds on our tails. There is simply no feasible way to safely move from place to place with you and remain incognito easily until you're better. You'll stick out too much." Steve nodded toward Nat, wanting her to convince their younger teammate. Wanda did not just appear distrustful or frightened; she also looked a bit angry.
"Wouldn't you like seeing the children? You can hang out with them and watch TV with Lila. You wouldn't have to see Tony. He's trying to help make up for what happened; he doesn't want to send you back to the Raft," Nat said firmly.
Then why is he trying to get house arrest for Scott, Clint, and Sam, and not Nat, Steve, or me? Wanda knew there was no way Stark could negotiate such a thing for Steve or her even if he wanted to because built-in enhancements, especially her, but that did not excuse him not doing that for Natasha. Though...I suppose he could have offered and she said no thanks. I don't think Nat would want that. She likes helping people too much to give that up, even if it means breaking the law. And she doesn't have children to return home to like Clint and Scott do. Rather than expressing any of her other suspicions or feelings, she said the one thing that most certainly did not have an explanation or excuse. "I know...Stark Industries m-made...that collar," she whispered, voice still raspy, but she didn't want to sign all of that, and she wanted Scott to understand without someone translating the finger spelling for him, because she knew he didn't know them. Explain that. I know, because I saw it in a mirror and Ross most certainly liked showing me when I wouldn't believe him because I didn't want to believe Stark would do something like that.
There was a tangible, stifling silence, and Wanda wondered if maybe she shouldn't have said that. Maybe it was manipulative and wrong to point that out, when the team must know already, and it didn't need to be said again.
"She has a point," Clint said after a minute, "and if she doesn't want to go, I don't blame her. How do we know we're not sending ourselves into a trap?" He wanted to see Laura and the kids very much himself, but that seemed a little too convenient and pleasant to be innocuous. "A vacation house? That just happens to have my family in it, who anyone would know that I want to see, and we're supposed to just trust that taking Wanda there when she's in this condition is safe? In upstate New York no less? Seems suspect."
"Could we video chat Tony?" Sam suggested. "Or, did he provide some kind of video message for us? Personally, I'm with them. It does seem a little too good to be true."
"There is a short video message actually. I can pull it up from the cockpit now."
For the first time Wanda thought she was rather glad she couldn't get up to go see this video; she pretended she had fallen asleep. She had no desire to see Stark's face right now. I don't hate him, but I don't want to see or hear him right now, either.
"Trained spy here, Wanda. You know I know you're not asleep," Nat said quietly. "Are you sure you don't want to see too? I know you don't like having decisions made for you."
That is what is going to happen anyway, because I can't go anywhere on my own right now whether I want to or not. D-O-E-S-N-T M-A-T-T-E-R, Wanda signed tiredly after a moment. She did not want to move unless she absolutely had to anyway, because it hurt too much, and she didn't particularly want to see or hear the message, either. It wasn't like seeing it herself was going to change whatever the others decided on. D-O-N-T W-A-N-T T-O S-E-E T-O-N-Y.
"All right. I've seen the message already, so I'll stay here." Natasha sat beside her, offering a juice box like Scott had been drinking before. "Seems Scott drank a few too many and this is the last one. He'll have a sugar high."
Wanda still didn't smile, but her eyes brightened a bit at that comment, because it amused her. The juice was just regular apple juice, but it was sweet and tart and delicious all at the same time, and she did not care one bit that it wasn't particularly cold anymore. The liquid helped soothe her sore throat, and she thought maybe she could talk a tiny bit without making it hurt more. "What made y-you...switch sides?"
"Do you think a government that condones what happened in the Raft should be overseeing the Avengers? That enhanced people should have their privacy violated simply because of who they are?"
Wanda shook her head slightly, unsure what to say to that. Nat had been on the other side before, and this did not explain why she had changed her mind. "Why join Stark...then?"
"I believed having oversight could be a good thing, but this certainly isn't the oversight we need. A compromise is what we should get. Maybe we should have oversight in an ideal world, yes, but...it's not, and we still have to live in it." Natasha was glad Wanda seemed to be talking a little more, even if she still only spoke in a raspy whisper. "I am so sorry it took three weeks to get you four out. We couldn't come sooner without risking blowing the entire plan or not having fake IDs and paperwork ready for all of us. I also was a bit occupied with a strange family reunion of sorts..."
I figured that much. And family reunion? I shall have to ask about that later. Wanda was not at all upset with them for not coming sooner. She could logically process any number of reasons why it may have been impossible to execute an escape plan successfully sooner. Heck, it probably had to do with making sure that stupid vacation house plan would not fall apart. Maybe Clint's family needed to be settled in for their "vacation" for some time so that the timing of their arrival there didn't just conveniently coincide with the Raft escape. She just wished very much that she had not let herself end up in that horrible prison in the first place, where it was too late for her to do anything to escape. I-S N-Y H-O-U-S-E R-E-A-L-L-Y S-A-F-E? she signed slowly. I do trust Nat. She wouldn't purposely send me somewhere she thought was unsafe. She couldn't have possibly known what the Raft people would do to me.
"It is as safe as it can be, yes. Tony does not hate you, Wanda. He wouldn't set this up and then rat you out just out of spite. If anything, he can't do that even if he wanted to. He'll get in trouble himself." Natasha went to find a few ice packs. Wanda hadn't made a peep of complaint about any pain, but it was growing more obvious that she was merely pretending she was okay the longer she stayed awake, even though she was just resting. Other than that episode earlier, the girl seemed strangely...fine. The appearing fine but not moving was more suspicious than if Wanda had been expressing she was hurting, crying the entire time she was awake, or repeatedly trying to get up...the latter of which she had done every other time Nat had seen Wanda injured in any way. "I can't give you any pain meds yet since we don't know what other drugs might still be in your system from the Raft, but you can have some ice packs, at least."
"I'm fine." And he could just claim I mind-controlled him or something, and most certainly everyone would believe him.
"You are not fine, you aren't pulling the 'I'm fine, I'm getting up now' nonsense routine you always do."
Wanda thought this was rather unfair that she should get scolded for that when she'd seen Natasha do the same thing, the others too, really, but she kept this to herself. Mostly she was just worried if Clint came back and there were ice packs on her, he would get all mad, jumpy, snappy all over again because he would get even more concerned. "Don't want t' m-make...Clint upset," she whispered.
"He's just concerned about you, all the more so because he does know exactly what you feel like. I don't think giving you some ice packs is going to make him any more upset than he already is." Nat returned with three ice packs, asking where Wanda wanted them.
Wanda's first thought was that she wanted one on her neck, but she also remembered ice was bad for burns. A-R-M, she signed.
"You know you can vent about whatever's really bothering you. Whenever you're ready. You never, ever reach out for help without being prodded repeatedly into doing so, so I'm making it clear that you can."
I don't want to discuss anything. Maybe if I ignore it and shove it away, it will stop hurting...No it won't. I should know that already. I M-I-S-S P-I-E-T-R-O, Wanda signed finally, dropping the now-empty juice box on the floor.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Nat asked carefully, mostly expecting a no, because Wanda usually did not talk about her twin or how she missed him or anything at all about Pietro when she was sad or otherwise upset; she usually only talked about him voluntarily when she was happy, or at least...mostly happy.
"No," said Wanda predictably, and wouldn't say any more. But it's...nice to know I could talk if I do want to, at least.
Natasha thought Wanda being imprisoned in the Raft with who knew what being done to her probably reminded her of being with Hydra, which would explain why she was mentioning Pietro now...because he had been there with her. "You don't have to talk right now, but you do sometime. Bug any of us whenever you're ready."
O-K.
They sat for a bit in a pleasant silence waiting for the rest of the team to come back. Wanda could hear them talking but did not particularly care enough to decipher what they were saying. Besides, she could feel herself fading into sleep for real now. At least she would not have to worry about some dream setting her magic off and then jerking her awake with another shock from that awful collar. I am safe, I am not there any longer, she reminded herself firmly.
Natasha waited until she was sure Wanda had completely fallen asleep before going to check what the others were up to, leaving some water within reach in case Wanda woke up and wanted more. "She's asleep for now. Have we decided who's going where yet?"
"You, Clint, and Wanda will head to New York once we collect supplies from the safe house, like we planned originally before the escape," Steve explained. "Scott and Sam will stay at the safe house. I'll come so I can drop you three off and bring the quinjet back. Wanda doesn't want to hear or watch Tony's message for herself, I assume."
"She just doesn't want anything to do with him right now. I wasn't going to make her. Maybe she'll watch the message later, but if not, I see no reason to push it."
Notes:
Annnd they're out!
I wanted Tony to help from behind the scenes a little, hence this plan. I have no idea what would have possessed him to have Stark Industries create that shock collar, which we know it was because it SAYS it on it right on-screen, but I also really don't believe he'd want Wanda harmed, even if the two of them have some, ah, bad history to say the least. So I figure maybe it's a prototype thing he didn't mean to actually have created and he feels guilty about it, so he's going to help make up for it by providing a temporary safe space. *shrug* idk! But I wanted to make up an explanation for the whole thing and this is what I came up with lol. Plus now we will get Family Friendship Fluff scenes and I am very excited to write and share those:)
I know I did not focus a whole lot on the action sequences of the group escaping, but since I'm mostly focusing on Wanda, who obviously would not process a lot of those details very well since she's hurt pretty badly, I figured it made sense to keep it mostly limited to what she knows, which is not a lot, though it was great fun to let her do that to Damian finally heheheh xD I...may have had that sequence planned for AGES lol.
Next chapter coming soon:)
Chapter 5: Chapter 5
Summary:
In which the team prepares to split up between Nat’s safe house and the NY vacation house, Nat takes care of Wanda, and the group is able to chill for a bit.
Notes:
Just hopping in to say that yes, I realize Wanda isn’t, in fact, just an older teenager in AoU and CW in official canon after we got age confirmation in WandaVision, but I can’t really see her as anything else in those two movies lol. She is sure as heck treated like a kid! Especially by Clint and Steve xD In my head she’s like 19 at this point in the timeline, not 27.
I will have Wanda watch/hear Tony's message eventually, but she's not ready to do that right now, so she won't for quite awhile. To her she's just thinking "well if the others trust it I kind of have to go along with whatever they plan anyway, so I'm not subjecting myself to seeing that message right now since I have no choice in the decision regardless." It's not like she can just peace out and run off on her own at the moment. Hopefully that makes sense? Anyways.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda slept peacefully all the way until the quinjet landed. The small jolt of the landing made her cringe in pain and reluctantly open her eyes. Safe, safe, not on the Raft. Don't...panic again. It's fine.
...I didn't have any dreams at all. I slept and I did not wake up being shocked again. Wanda briefly worried again that torture device was back on her neck, because she could still feel something there, and her burns throbbed and itched something awful. That is not right, either. I can move and there's nothing sharp constantly stabbing me any more. Stop it. Nat said she and Clint had to bandage it. I just feel that, that is all. She studied her good arm closely; as promised, Nat must have removed that IV at some point while she slept, because there was only a small bandage at the crease of her elbow now where the IV had been before. This was fine. Wanda did not like knowing people touched her while she was unaware of it, but this was okay, because she knew Natasha and the others weren't going to hurt her.
"Hey, we're at the Norway safe house," Nat was saying calmly. "We'll pick up more supplies and get cleaned up. Then you, Clint, and I will head to New York. Sam and Scott will stay here. Steve is merely dropping the three of us off there and immediately leaving. Understand?"
Wanda blinked, trying to clear her head. I don't want to go there. I knew I would have to, but...I don't want to. She nodded slightly to show she understood and closed her eyes again. Maybe Natasha would just let her lie there until these supplies were gathered, because she was too tired to move.
"No, you're coming inside too. You need clean clothes, same as the rest of us. Tell me when it's all right to move you."
Wanda thought it would be nice to have clean things to wear and maybe wash her hair, but then that meant someone would have to help her change into the new clothes, and that was humiliating, so no thank you, absolutely not. She did open her eyes again and proceeded to give Natasha a look that clearly said she did not want to move.
"Don't give me that look. Either tell me when or I'm hauling you inside whether you like it or not."
T-I-R-E-D.
"I know. You can sleep as much as you want afterwards. I don't want you to get sick on top of being injured. You're very lucky you're not sick. You cannot stay dirty like that. I don't want any of those injuries to get infected." Natasha glanced around to make sure all the boys had left the quinjet and then added in a softer voice, thinking she probably knew the real reason the younger girl was behaving a bit strangely, "There are plenty of extra towels inside. Nobody has to see anything, including me, I promise."
Wanda's cheeks turned a little red, clearly embarrassed, but she finally acquiesced her agreement. "Okay." D-O-N-T L-I-K-E B-U-T O-K.
Nat nodded and scooped her up. Wanda made a quiet pained squeak but didn't protest otherwise. Norway was pleasantly chilly, Wanda thought, the air smelled crispy and nice and it was not pouring rain, just breezy. The breeze made her shiver, but not like the awful cold, hard floor in her cell, or those hours and hours spent strapped to that freezing metal table in the disorienting dark silence. Inside the safe house, the sweet scent of cinnamon and gingerbread greeted her. One of the others must have located and lit a scented candle. And it was warm. Warm and cozy, even if it was just a temporary safe house.
"There's two bathrooms. Wanda and I will take the larger one. Rest of you can fight over the other one," Nat announced.
"Predictable," Clint said, shaking his head. "We already started running a warm bath in there. I think Steve even laid some clothes out for you two in that bedroom across the hall. Go ahead. Scott's hopped in the tiny bathroom already, so I guess he's getting clean first."
Natasha carried Wanda to the larger bathroom and then debated what to do next since clearly Wanda could not stand on her own right now. Finally, she simply set Wanda down on the edge of the tub, keeping an arm around her thin shoulders for support, and snagged a towel off a shelf with the other. "Here. Your job is to hold this against yourself while I get these filthy things off. Can you do that?"
"Yes." Wanda did not sound happy, and she was visibly tense, but she did as she was told, keeping her good arm held tight across her chest clutching the towel, even as she felt her head droop tiredly again. Calm down. Nobody is going to hurt me here, and Nat already saw me unconscious. She's not going to fuss or make weird comments. There were definitely horrible bruises all over her back, and holding the dumb towel over her front wasn't going to hide those.
The blue prison shirt and pants went on the floor, and Wanda gave them a hateful glare. "Can I...burn those?" Wanda's whisper sounded pissed enough to kill. If fabric could feel, it should have been terrified.
"If you want to. Or you could shred them with your magic," Natasha told her, as if she had a conversation like this every day. "Okay, in we go. Hair first?"
Wanda blinked again and nodded a tiny bit, trying not to react to the warm water touching her sensitive skin and making the wound on her leg and all the rest of the many cuts and scrapes sting. It was okay to express that she was hurting here, she reminded herself. No one was going to use pain against her or poke at something that already hurt to make it hurt more. Nat was asking if she was still okay. "I...I won't panic," she said after a minute of consideration. No, I'm not okay, but I'm safe. I don't need to scare myself.
"All right. You need to tell me if anything starts to hurt more than it does right now, immediately. Can I trust you to do that much?"
Wanda glanced at Natasha shakily. Black Widow sounded angry, but she was just reaching for the shampoo, one arm still supporting Wanda's trembling shoulders gently. She is not mad at me. I know that. Stop jumping at every little thing. Wanda nodded again, squeezing her eyes shut.
It did not start to hurt more; if anything the warm water helped make her sore joints feel a little less achy. Wanda thought the shampoo smelled nice. "Strawberries," she whispered suddenly. It smells like strawberries.
"Yeah, that's all I could get when I was stocking this place. Kids shampoo," Nat said teasingly, which made Wanda open her eyes and give her a disapproving look. "What?"
"Y...call me...kid." Wanda was not really particularly annoyed anyway, and the running joke amused her at this point. Natasha's protective big sister behavior was nice, too.
"I don't know what you mean. I'm going to use the same shampoo when you're done, and the boys will have to smell like fake strawberries too. It was kids shampoo. Now it's Avengers shampoo."
Wanda glanced at Natasha again, her green eyes a little brighter now; this entertained her. She did not say anything, but a little of the tenseness dissipated from her shoulders.
They didn't say anything for awhile, and finally Nat said carefully, knowing Wanda would not be happy, "Now I need you to wash the rest yourself. Check for any more injuries we might need to address, and please be honest. Eyes are closed and I won't open them until you say so. I promise."
"...'Kay. Don't...look."
"I won't." Natasha thought Wanda was altogether too fussy about bodies, but if the girl wanted her privacy, then that was fine and she'd respect that. There had probably been very, very little privacy whilst stuck on the Raft.
"Done," Wanda whispered a few minutes later, her shaky hand again clutching the towel over her chest. I shouldn't be so tired. I barely did anything.
"Okay. Damage report?"
Wanda was not sure how to explain that there were multiple large bruises all over her, a few of which she thought were simply from the broken ribs, but that she honestly didn't think any of it was worth worrying about. She was just stiff and sore all over. There were some long partially healed cuts on her side just below her ribs that she had no clear memory of receiving (probably way back from the failed escape incident, she suspected), but they didn't look too serious, either. "Not...bad."
"Wanda, what does that mean? Do I need to be concerned?" Natasha asked quietly.
Wanda squeezed her eyes shut again, frustrated that she couldn't exactly sign an answer while holding onto the towel since she only had one usable hand at the moment, and words were failing her and it still hurt to talk. I don't know how to explain. “Not...dangerous," she murmured.
"That's not reassuring. We'll get you dried off and into some clean clothes. Then you can sign it instead," Natasha decided, in a tone that left no room for discussion.
Okay. I can do that. Wanda didn't react much while the tub drained, she traded the wet towel for a fluffy dry one wrapped around herself like a dress, and Nat took her to the carpeted bedroom across the narrow hall. She felt herself gently laid down on the bed against the pillows and stayed quiet, her fingers fiddling with a loose thread on the towel nervously.
"Now tell me what you were trying to say in the bathroom, please." Wanda hesitantly signed that she thought it was mostly just bruises that couldn't be helped, probably from the broken ribs. Natasha appeared mollified by this explanation. "Is there any more damage I can't see?"
"Cuts...here." Wanda traced a line on her side just below her ribs, which made her flinch at her own touch. "Multiple."
"Thank you for being honest. Will you let me look at them after we get some clothes for you?" Natasha could tell Wanda hadn't wanted to share that information, but at least she had done so without fuss and seemed agreeable to letting someone help her.
Okay. I can do that. Wanda whispered another yes, and made no further comment.
Soon Wanda found herself in a loose burgundy t-shirt and some soft black sweatpants. She lay very still while Natasha looked at the cuts, and didn't say anything at all. I'm okay. I'm safe now, it just still hurts, she reminded herself.
Nat frowned, thinking that it looked like someone-or someones-must have slashed Wanda with a knife several times. She figured they were probably back from the failed escape attempt, but decided not to ask since Wanda probably would not want to answer. "These look like they've been there awhile. I don't think any of this needs stitches at this point, so long as you don't tear them open straining yourself. They'll probably scar, but they should heal just fine otherwise. We'll just put some antibiotic ointment on them and cover it. Sound good?" Natasha kept her voice quiet, trying to keep her younger teammate calm. Wanda was staring at her with wide eyes, obviously uncomfortable, but she did not move. "Okay, I'll take that as a yes, but if you need me to stop for a minute, tell me."
O-K. Wanda flinched at being touched, but she did not react further. She felt a fuzzy blanket put in her hand in a few minutes, Nat saying if she was still cold then she should roll herself up in it like a burrito. Wanda blinked again, wondering if this was supposed to make her laugh. She did not feel like laughing now, just...so, so unsure of herself. I don't know what I'm supposed to feel. S-O-R-R-Y, she signed suddenly. There were tears burning her eyes and then making the scrapes and cuts on her face sting. Stop it. Just stop. What is setting me off now? Wanda swiped at her eyes roughly, not understanding what had made her break down so abruptly. She was fine, that mortifying bath that had honestly not been nearly as bad as she'd expected was done, the bed was soft and the clothes were soft and smelled nice, she was clean and, okay, not healthy, but still. Nat tending to and re-bandaging everything that needed it hurt quite a bit, but ordinarily that sort of thing did not make her cry. Natasha was even telling her exactly what she was doing and when, which also helped. Nobody was fussing or yelling or being horrible to her, why was she crying? "I...I don't...know why..."
"It's okay to cry. There doesn't have to be a specific reason. I told you that you don't have to keep pretending you're fine. Crying is good." Natasha pulled Wanda's hand away from her face and added, "You do know I'm the last person that's going to judge you for bawling because something awful happened to you, right?"
"It...weeks. Not...years," Wanda mumbled. "Red Room...years." I know. I saw it. I made Nat see those horrid memories. I...I tortured her. That was cruel. I did something stupid Ross would do. Wanda tugged her hand away and signed furiously as fast her fingers could form the letters, 'I am like Ross. I hurt you with memories. I hate him. I hate me.'
"Except you're crying because you hurt someone and Ross enjoys doing it, so that is not the same at all. Using people's worst nightmares, worst fears, whatever, was a weapon you were taught to use on opponents back then, yes?"
What? Wanda wasn't sure what Natasha meant by saying that, but she nodded yes. That was true.
"Then that is no different from my being an assassin for the Red Room. Remember the red in my ledger? Maybe you have some too. Maybe we all do. But you are not like Ross. So don't-"
"We volunteered. You...didn't."
Nat knew quite well what Wanda meant; that she had volunteered for Hydra and that she, Natasha, hadn't even had that choice with the Red Room. "You and Pietro had no clue what you were really volunteering for at all. You were a couple of desperate, hopeful kids. Your crime was naïveté. You even told us before that you two would never have volunteered if you'd known what it really was."
S-T-I-L-L N-O-T O-K, Wanda signed shakily.
"Of course not. But I'm certainly not going to hold a grudge against you for it. Moreover, your comment that you were only in the Raft for three weeks and so it's unfair to compare that with years in the Red Room is nonsense." Natasha began gently brushing Wanda's tangled but clean hair.
"...Why?"
"Because you are also stacking a crap life since you were a small child on top of being tortured for 'only' weeks in a government-sanctioned prison that you only escaped less than 24 hours ago. Wanda, you are being ridiculous. Weeks of torture would mess up anyone, with or without that. Do you think I don't know that for myself? You can cry and be pissed, upset, scared, frustrated, whatever you want. Nobody in this house is going to judge you. I promise." Nat thought for a moment and went on, "You can stick your brave face on in public if you need to, but not here."
"The oth...others are...fine," Wanda mumbled, barely audible. The realization that her friend really did understand, understood exactly what had happened to her both with Hydra and the Raft, because Natasha had experienced similar horrible things herself, made it easier to admit things to her now.
"They are physically fine mostly, if a bit thinner and tired, yes."
Wanda gave her a confused look and then dipped her head, feeling stupid. That's why Clint was acting weird on the way here. Because he is not fine.
"So, give yourself a break. If the guys are not fine and they're not seriously injured like you, why should you expect yourself to be fine?" Natasha continued brushing Wanda's long hair in silence for quite awhile; the younger girl still seemed upset and a bit sniffly, but she was clearly more relaxed now. "Would you like me to braid your hair?"
Y-E-S P-L-E-A-S-E.
"Then we'll braid it." Natasha braided Wanda's damp hair quickly and put it over her shoulder. "There you go. Would you like anything else?"
W-H-Y A-R-E Y-O-U O-K A-F-T-E-R A-N-D I-M N-O-T? Wanda's shaky hand touched her hair once she was finished signing. It seemed strange now, realizing she hadn't been able to touch her own hair for three weeks, and nobody else touched it either except for yanking or grabbing at it briefly when someone injected those unknown drugs into her neck. This was not something that she had remotely thought about at all while imprisoned on the Raft, but all of a sudden it felt like a big deal, because her hair had definitely been a filthy tangled mess, and now her friend made it feel normal and done something pretty with it for her. Natasha hadn't yanked her hair at all, not even while getting all the knots out of it.
"One, I've had years to deal with it by now. Two, you, especially you the telepath, should know I'm not as fine as I appear. Three, you just ask Clint what I was like when he first took me in from the Red Room." Natasha could tell something about Wanda's hair was making her emotional, but decided not to press about it, since she seemed more relieved than upset. "What a destructive little shit death machine I could be, both to others and myself. You, on the other hand, rather have too many feelings leaking everywhere rather than too little. Yours explode. Red Room beats that out of you."
Wanda gazed at the older Avenger, feeling like simply being told those things so matter-of-factly was in of itself saying Nat was not really okay. Natasha was saying she didn't have enough feelings, but not showing feelings on the outside didn't mean they weren't there at all. "You...comforting...broken me...who put...bad memories..." Wanda blinked, not wanting to start crying again, feeling like all of the tears she had kept repeatedly trying to hold back on the Raft were just all pouring out at the slightest provocation now. They came out anyway, and this frustrated her. "They...not steal...emotions. None." R-E-D R-O-O-M F-A-I-L-E-D.
Nat didn't answer her immediately; she knew why Wanda had said those things. She did give her younger teammate's good hand a gentle squeeze. "Perhaps it would be more accurate to say that it beats out one's ability to express emotions well. You lose your...sense of self. Also, if you're broken, then so is literally every other member of the team. Seems to come with our job. If you don't think the rest of us are, then neither are you."
This oddly made Wanda feel better rather than worse, because it was like acknowledging something was, in fact, wrong with her, but it was normal and not something weird or bad. It was just that the rest of the team did not have mysterious, powerful enhancements affected by emotions, which was not a good thing for someone like her to have. "Thank you...talking to...me."
Natasha thought this meant Wanda had decided she was finished discussing for now, but really did feel a little better. "I'm going to take a shower myself now, all right? Would you like to go to the living room or stay here?"
Wanda debated for a moment; she did not want to be left alone at all right now, but she also didn't really want to move, either. This bed was too nice and comfy for her to want to move. There was a very, very pleasant cooking smell coming from the kitchen, though... S-T-A-Y. Natasha would be in the bathroom right across the hall; it was safe.
"That's fine, but I'm going to ask one of the boys to sit with you. I don't want you alone."
Wanda didn't protest. Ordinarily that might have made her a bit salty, that Natasha wouldn't trust her to be left alone, but she did not want to be alone anyway.
___________
Nat returned with Scott in tow. "Now don't let her try getting up on her own, and don't talk her ears off, either. You talk too much."
Scott was mildly offended. "I do not talk too much. You can trust me with Little Red Witch Girl. Promise."
"She's not Little Red Riding Hood."
"You gave her a red blanket and she has it on her head like a hood and cape. Literally."
Wanda found this very amusing, and she finally found herself smiling for the first time since escaping the Raft. Thank you. Thank you for that. “Wolf bit me," she whispered, with a deadpan expression that unnerved Scott, who thought something was genuinely wrong and that it wasn't just a morbid joke, and made Natasha start laughing.
"Lang, she's joking. Which is a good thing," Natasha pointed out, absolutely delighted that for some reason, Scott's dumb joke had amused a very upset Wanda enough to make her smile and joke back. "Okay, I'll be in the bathroom. Knock if you need me." She gave Wanda one last smile before leaving.
"You doing a little better now, then?" Scott asked hopefully.
Wanda nodded a bit. "I'm...okay." Maybe okay wasn't the right word, but she wasn't sure how to explain. Certainly Scott knew she felt terrible physically; she didn't need to tell him that. But feelings wise, she did feel somewhat okay at the moment. Not great, but okay.
"You hesitated."
Wanda had the distinct feeling this was some media reference she did not get, from the expression on Scott's face. And she didn't want to talk much more, and he didn't know the signs for the letters. Wanda's free hand twitched nervously, fiddling with the blanket and pulling it further over her head. She hated not 'getting' things, because fluent English did not make you an expert on pop culture things, and it made her feel like more of an outsider...and she especially hated not being able to express herself easily. "I...don't...understand," she admitted finally.
Scott frowned but quickly recovered. "It's just a line from a Disney movie Cassie likes. I guess I just assumed you'd seen those at some point."
"...Old ones. Some." Wanda's nervous fiddling with the blanket grew more pointed, and Scott finally took her hand and gently laid it down again. She immediately curled her hand into a fist, running her nails back and forth on the fuzzy blanket. I can move, I can touch and feel things now. I am not stuck in that straitjacket anymore. I am lying in Nat's safe house, and Scott is talking to me. I'm fine.
"Would you like to show me the rest of the signs for the letters?" Scott suggested, thinking that maybe this would help, since it seemed like Wanda didn't want to speak more but still wanted to communicate further. "Hawkeye got me up to L on the quinjet while you were asleep. You might have to review that first part though."
Something I can do. Wanda quickly ran through the letters up to L, and then moved on to M, holding that letter up, then N. "Only thumb...different," she whispered. "Like...circle," she mentioned about O. This was kind of fun. She did not have to get up to share this information, and she enjoyed learning and practicing languages anyway. They went on up to T, and then Clint stuck his head in. Wanda waved at him.
"I see, my student is being a teacher now," Clint teased. "Is Ant-Man a good pupil?"
Wanda glanced at Scott, her eyes twinkling. T-R-I-E-S H-A-R-D, she signed quickly.
Scott knew Wanda had probably silently insulted him, because she had signed too fast for him to decipher what she'd spelled, despite her shaky fingers, and it made Clint start laughing. "What did she say, Hawkeye?"
"She says you try hard."
"Hey. Why does that feel like an insult?"
Wanda didn't look very sorry, and went back to showing him the rest of the letters. Clint watched from the doorway, relieved to see Wanda behaving more like her usual self, at least for now. She already seemed better than she had been on the jet. Clearly getting some sleep and a bath and clean clothes had helped a bit already. There were still dark circles under her eyes, she was paler than normal, and the bruises and cuts littering her skin along with the more serious injuries hadn't all miraculously vanished of course, but she was alive and safe. And she was awake...and didn't appear scared to communicate, either, which had been worrying him ever since the telepathic messages ceased in the Raft days ago. In any event, he no longer had this sickening feeling in his gut worrying that she might die. Watching her practice signing with Scott made him feel better.
Wanda abruptly sensed Clint's attention on her, and she stared at him in concern. Y-O-U O-K? she signed cautiously. Nat said they were not fine either. Maybe he is scared for no reason too.
"Yeah, yeah, just...relieved you're doing a little better." Clint didn't want to stick any more burden of I have to pretend to be fine on Wanda, but lying to her would do no good, even if she wasn't a very emotional telepath. "I do not like seeing people I care about hurt, especially when there is nothing I can do about it."
Wanda wasn't sure how she was supposed to react to that. Scott looked about as unsure what to say as she felt. Then Clint went on, "You did good in there, you know, kid," and she felt tears pooling in her eyes as she watched him walk off abruptly. Why is that making me cry? That's a compliment, that's a good thing. She did not feel like she had "done good in there", not one bit. He looked tense. "Check...on him," she whispered.
"Black Widow kind of threatened to kill me if I left you alone. I think he'll be fine."
Oh, she will not. Wanda pointed to the door, obviously still wanting Scott to go check and make sure Clint was indeed fine.
"You're upset yourself, I'm not leaving you alone," Scott said firmly. Wanda gave him such a frustrated, reproachful look that he sighed and stood up. "All right all right, I'm checking. Don't...get up or anything. You stay there."
Wanda watched him innocently; she knew she couldn't follow him even if she wanted to. She could barely hold her head up right now without resting it on the pillows. I'd collapse if I tried. Or make myself pass out. Yes, I will stay put.
The timing was either perfect or horrible, because Natasha returned less than a minute after Scott had left the room. "I told that man specifically not to leave you alone!"
Wanda signed that actually Nat had threatened him.
Natasha thought this response probably meant Wanda had asked Scott to do something. "If you asked him to do something, he should have yelled for one of the others to do it, not left you alone."
"No...no." Wanda's hand was getting very, very tired from signing so much, so her explanation was slower this time. C-L-I-N-T S-A-D. W-A-N-T-E-D S-C-O-T-T C-H-E-C-K.
Oh. "When I told you they weren't fine, that didn't mean neglect your own safety to check on them," Natasha told her. "Suppose you panicked. You can't yell for help right now if something like that did happen. You might hurt yourself further trying to deal on your own. I know you were genuinely fine this time, but still."
But I did know you were across the hall. I was safe. Wanda didn't answer this, feeling more than a little mortified that her friend didn't want her alone because she was concerned about that.
Nat paused and asked quietly, "Would it be all right to ask you something you might not want to answer? If you don't want to, that's fine, but I think I need to at least ask, especially after your fussing about the bath before. I was...thinking about it for awhile."
Wanda studied her curiously, but nodded after barely a moment's thought.
"Did anyone hurt or touch you in any way in that place besides what you've shared?" Natasha watched Wanda closely; she didn't seem to understand at first, but then the realization dawned on her, and her gaze closed off again. "I just want to make sure it's just you liking your privacy and not...because of something else. I don't think I saw one other girl in that entire hellhole other than you and myself. That is a prime place for a woman to get sexually assaulted. Did anyone do anything like that to you?"
"No," Wanda said softly. I suppose someone could have while I was unconscious at some point, but I don't believe so. Those people would have been too pleased and immediately told me. She hesitated and then signed slowly, I S-C-A-R-E-D T-H-E-M. That was one good thing, at least; those people had not seemed to be interested in assaulting her in that way ever, not even the cruel ones like Damian. Wanda slowly continued her signing to explain that those men had not wanted to be physically near her at all whenever possible, even if they were repeatedly shocking her, and she'd actively encouraged that fear herself.
Natasha stilled Wanda's shaking hand with a gentle squeeze. "I think that is a good thing. I'm glad you were spared that. There's nothing wrong with what you did."
Wanda's eyes fluttered closed, not in an I'm done talking way. She was just exhausted.
Natasha could tell Wanda was fading quickly, but she did not seem particularly distressed at the moment, just tired. "I think we should hurry and get to New York as quickly as we can now that everyone's clean and we've ditched the prison garb. You can sleep as long as you want there, and you can sleep on the way, too. There'll be an SUV waiting for us about an hour and a half or so from the vacation house, and we don't want to leave it unattended if at all possible. Do you want to rest in the living room while we load up?"
Wanda nodded a little; she didn't particularly want to move, but she also knew not being in the living room would make things take longer since then Natasha would either stay with her herself or have one of their teammates do so. So she decided to be agreeable. The living room would be fine.
__________
Wanda wanted to do something to help, but instead Nat left her settled in a soft but scruffy-looking recliner in the living room, her ankle and arm propped up with pillows. "You can't right now, so you stay right here," Natasha said firmly.
Wanda made no further protests. She just closed her eyes and listened to the rest of the team bustling around and talking. Their voices genuinely being right there instead of way across a prison aisle was reassuring. She was nearly asleep again when someone asked her a question. Question. There was some kind of question. Or at least just someone talking directly to me. “I didn't...hear...sorry."
"That's fine. Just wondering if you'd like some cookies and milk," Sam said now, a mug and a plate of cookies in hand.
Yes. Wanda did not want help, and she figured she would probably make a mess trying to hold a mug of milk at the moment. Besides, she didn't trust herself to swallow anything like cookies anyway, so she signed no thank you instead.
Sam looked like he did not believe her, and set the dessert on the end table. "Well, I'm going to leave it here anyway in case you change your mind. I was organizing our gear while you were with Nat, and put your suit, a few clothes, and some money and things together in a duffel I found in here. You really don't carry anything else on you besides a taser and a tiny gun I don't think I've ever seen you use outside training in the first place? At first I figured some of your things must have been stolen or stored somewhere else in the Raft, but I have since been informed otherwise. I know you don't need to carry more, but still."
Wanda was mildly amused at this, because Sam looked a little concerned. Even those two piddly weapons had not really been her idea; the small pistol was from Clint and the taser from Nat. If she hadn't been given those, she would just walk into a fight 'unarmed', because she already had more than enough weapons built right inside her, and she was much better at wielding her own powers than ordinary weapons. There was also the whole 'if your weapon is taken from you it becomes a liability' thing. "...walking nuke...'member?" I'm useless right now, but...not before. She closed her eyes, trying to reach for her magic inside, but it hunkered down further in her chest and didn't want to do anything. She ripped a bit free anyway, ignoring the painful tearing sensation that caused, and held out her hand, scarlet wisps dancing around her fingers. "That is...mine. I'm not...unarmed, y-you know."
"I know. Well...your gear will be right in here, ready and waiting for you as soon as you're strong enough. There's a few other things in here too for you."
Wanda blinked and reached to touch her suit, neatly folded and waiting for her in the duffel. She hadn't seen her things since the day of the airport fight, and seeing it now, weeks later, elicited mixed feelings for her. Could she really, truly put that back on and try to do something good in this broken world, to help mitigate for her own past mistakes, knowing she would be putting a larger target on her back by doing so? Maybe she should just stay hiding and not do anything at all. She might just mess up again and hurt more people like she had in Lagos. I hadn't even really considered what all of us were going to do exactly after any escape. Obviously Sam and Nat, at least, think we're still going to...do missions and whatever, fugitives or not.
"Nobody is going to force you to put that back on, Wanda," Sam said quietly. "But it's here as a choice if you want it. Heck, you never have to go on any missions again if you don't want to. But-"
"I have to," Wanda interrupted, fingers squeezed into a fist again. I have to, because Pietro is not here and I will do it for him because he can't. Pietro only got to be an Avenger for one day. He wanted to be a hero. Change the world. I will keep going for him. "Maybe...subtle..." she hesitated, unsure how to explain herself when she didn't quite understand what she wanted in the first place. H-A-T-E S-P-O-T-L-I-G-H-T, she signed.
"You want to continue Avengers missions, but behind the scenes or otherwise lowkey roles for awhile, because putting a suit back on is too front and center for your tastes at the moment?" Sam hoped he was reading Wanda correctly; more often than not she was a bit of an enigma to him. The girl was extra as hell much of the time, but then she also didn't like being the center of attention or any kind of media stuff, either. She was quiet often, but then sometimes she would open her mouth and say something snarky. She didn't like hurting people, but heaven forbid something or someone pissed her off, especially if it involved insulting or hurting someone she loved.
Oddly, seeing her in the interrogation room on the Raft had made her easier to understand. Sam's own strategy was simply silence, which Wanda had appeared to follow suit with the first time...but the couple subsequent times they'd been dumped in that room together, she had snapped at Ross, threatened to mind-control a guard again (Ross looked scared and immediately shocked her badly for that), taunted him to leave her in sensory-deprived solitary again (Ross was baffled but did not do that to her again after that)...and appeared scared of a plain manila folder (Ross shocked her for refusing to look at whatever was in it, and then she still refused to look afterward anyway). Comparing that sort of seemingly reckless behavior with Scott's reports of what a clearly frightened Wanda was doing in her cell (mostly sitting and staring glassy-eyed, quietly crying, or listening) made it very, very clear that she'd been using all that prickly anger in an attempt to hide that she was scared and hurt. Probably she did the same thing the rest of the time too, just...not to the same extent.
Wanda nodded. "Thank y..." she trailed off, not wanting to speak more, and finished, F-O-R I-N-C-L-U-D-I-N-G M-E.
"Yeah, well. Steve, Scott, and I won't be seeing you for awhile, and I wanted to make sure you had these things, just in case you need 'em before we meet up again later."
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It was completely dark when the group leaving settled in for the flight across the Atlantic back to New York. "Accounting for the time difference, we should be landing in New York at around 9PM EST. If everything goes according to plan, we'll either beat the car to the drop off point, or we'll meet it there at the same time." Steve frowned, unsure if this was a good thing timing-wise or not. They could not exactly have the quinjet staying around, so he'd be leaving his three teammates in the open temporarily.
"Who exactly is dropping this car off, and where?" Clint asked. "And why are we not simply dropping us at that vacation house? I saw Tony's message and I believe he means it to be safe, but I don't like this extra leg of the plan. It means Nat, Wanda, and I are going to be on the road for over an hour, vulnerable while we drive the rest of the way."
"There's nowhere to land there," Nat said. "That, and the closer the quinjet is to that vacation house, the more risky it may be."
"And the spider kid from the airport is dropping the car off, in an abandoned field. I've got the coordinates. He didn't sign the Accords either and isn't registered himself, so Tony thought him helping us would be an...olive branch of sorts. Proof that he's not trying to rat us out to Ross."
"Hypocrite," Wanda muttered, displeased with that information. So it was somehow okay for Iron Man to protect Spider-Man from the stupid Accords, but not her, Cap, or the others? Ridiculous.
"Okay, so that's great for us, but why is he protecting another hero's identity, a hero who also hasn't signed the Accords?" Clint sighed and settled back in his seat, glancing at Wanda lying in her cocoon of blankets and pillows on the floor. She had been half asleep, but now she was fully awake again and clearly irritated.
"I don't know, but I imagine it's because he found out what was going on inside the Raft," Steve answered slowly. "Because I did not ask Tony for help. He volunteered it by proxy."
"The hell, Cap? So he has to see his shit prototype creation torture someone in order to want to protect Spider-Man?" Clint jumped up and stuck his head into the cockpit. "He sounded like a teenage kid in the airport. Wanda is probably not all that much older than him. Tony decided he felt bad? Well, not good enough! I hope he watches all the Raft video footage from the cells, and I'll tell him exactlywhat went on in that interrogation room whenever I see-"
"No!" Wanda made a strained squeak, wishing she could yell that. I don't want Clint to tell him that. None of it. No, no, no.
"Barton, shut up," Nat ordered, "you are not helping."
"Good, it wasn't supposed to be helpful."
"I mean that Wanda does not want you to do that. So...don't, if you're trying to help her."
Clint appeared to deflate and simply stalked back to his seat in silence. Then he stood up, went over to Wanda, and sat next to her instead. Wanda watched him curiously; this was more of the not fine behavior Natasha had talked about. She didn't say anything aloud or sign a word, but she did reach out shakily and pat his arm. "I would rather have been dragged into that room alone. Much, much easier," he admitted.
R-O-S-S K-N-E-W, Wanda signed simply. There was no doubt in her mind whatsoever that that was precisely why she had been repeatedly dragged into that interrogation room so many times even when the Raft people weren't interested in directing questions to her at all in many of those sessions, and didn't even want her talking. That and as a bonus, they probably figured torturing her would decrease the threat level of her potentially wrecking the place, especially as she felt herself deteriorating over all those days. Sam and Clint were trained to withstand torture, after all; Scott wasn't as far as she knew and neither was she. Using her as a threat wasn't something they could train for, and Scott's constant blabbing about his daughter had probably made them assume threatening another girl would get to him too, even if it was the walking nuke they didn't consider to be a person. Thank goodness Scott was so good at telling long, long stories for extended periods of time. He had been by far the most successful at keeping attention off of her somewhat.
"Yeah, he did." Clint brushed a loose bit of hair that had fallen out of Wanda's braid away from her face. "Go to sleep. You look exhausted."
Wanda's eyes drifted closed again, and she fell asleep almost immediately.
Notes:
I know Wanda isn't really doing much yet, but...yeah. She'll be okay, it'll just take awhile obviously.
next chapter coming soon! Any comments/feedback are much appreciated:)
Chapter 6: Chapter 6
Summary:
In which our heroes successfully make the trek to the NY vacation house, Wanda isn’t exactly in a great mental headspace but is able to relax a bit despite that, and Laura and the little Bartons appear.:)
Notes:
Writing this story is making me mentally plot out what Wanda was up to in the year between AoU and CW lol...I may have to actually write that out eventually too methinks, along with my unpublished post-MoM fic I’m working on because I want to give her some kind of peace/happy ending after all of that.
On to ch6 of THIS story!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"...courtesy of Vision, actually," Steve was saying when Wanda woke up again hours later.
Vision? What did he do? Wanda didn't open her eyes or stir a bit, wanting to eavesdrop on this conversation without interrupting it. Multiple times on the Raft, she had wondered if he knew what was happening to her, if he cared, and if he did, would he still want anything to do with her if she escaped. She did not consider Tony telling her that Vision missed her to be a reliable source of information. Vis liked rules. He did not understand breaking them and things being disorganized, and she sort of thought he liked being around her partially because she was the strange, chaotic one that felt like an outsider often, because he did not fit in either being a red synthezoid.
"He really sent you the Raft coordinates?" Clint asked suspiciously.
"He did, he said he found out Wanda was there and 'you must rescue her. It is unfair that she is there and I cannot do it myself'," Steve answered.
"No mention of the rest of you," Natasha teased, "until a separate message that added to clarify that Cap was supposed to get all four of you out, not Wanda only, transmitted a few minutes after."
Wanda felt a tiny, tiny bit of her magic loosen from the anxious pained ball of chaos in her heart, sending a bit of relieved warmth through her. Does Vis know what happened on the Raft? I'm...not sure I want him to know. Could he sense me still? Is that how he found out?
"How long were we in there before the Vision's messages went through?" Clint asked.
"Considering it was less than two days after the airport battle? I'll bet mere hours. A day, maybe. I think he may have been able to track her with the mind stone, since she's also connected to it in a way." There was an odd hitch in Steve's voice that Wanda didn't like; he sounded worried.
"You're telling me Stark's robot can just track Wanda anywhere she goes? That's real great, Cap. That's fine for now, but how about in a couple months when we're off on the run somewhere else? Is he going to turn her in if someone orders him to? What then?" Clint was pacing now, and Wanda could hear his footsteps going back and forth.
"If Wanda is fully recovered, she can handle herself fine. Thought you said she put him through the floor...all the floors, when you fetched her from the Compound." Natasha sounded somewhat concerned, but not like Clint did.
"She did, but she really didn't want to, and we don't know how long it's going to take for her to recover. If we have to leave that vacation house before she's healed, that's...dangerous. Very."
He's not just Stark's robot, Wanda thought to herself, but she couldn't help wondering if Clint had a point. If Vision had known where she was all the time, then couldn't he have gotten her out of the airport? No, he couldn't have, interfering would have simply criminalized his actions as well as hers, and like her, Vision wouldn't have wanted to crash the helicopters containing the strike teams either. Besides, she had sent him away to check on War Machine. He probably thought he wasn't supposed to come back. Couldn't he have gotten her out of the Raft before the endless nineteen days had passed? Maybe? Because if it was only a couple days in, she would not have been totally useless physically for an escape if someone removed that horrible shock collar...or even simply deactivated it so she could rip it off herself. She easily could have helped Vision get the rest of the team and herself out then. Well...he may have been physically unable to break the law in that way so directly after signing the Accords...Vis does still have programming...doesn't he?
Wanda also wondered if she could have mind-controlled multiple guards long enough for her to get it off back at the start too, but after the failed last-ditch escape attempt on day 6, there had been no chance for her to risk trying again, not with extra guards milling around her cell constantly, willing to shock her if they so much as thought she moved too quickly or looked suspicious.
The trouble was that they thought she looked suspicious often, which, to be fair, she probably did look suspicious often, she thought.
"Wanda, I know you are not sleeping anymore," Natasha said now, sounding mildly amused to have caught her eavesdropping.
Wanda opened her eyes and promptly closed them again, wincing as she shifted a bit in her cocoon of blankets and pillows on the floor to readjust her injured arm. It did not help; it still hurt, not as badly as it had for so long on the Raft, but still quite severely. I just wanted to know. I heard you talking about Vis. "I...miss him," she murmured. My arm is fine. Nat and Clint took care of it. It just still hurts anyway. Ignore it.
"Vision?"
Wanda's cheeks flushed the tiniest bit pink, and she nodded slightly. She was a bit mad at him, and distrustful for not helping sooner, but mostly she just wanted to see and talk to him herself and find out why. There had to be some kind of explanation. He wouldn't have sent Steve those Raft coordinates if he didn't care.
"Wanda, if you ever see him, you need to be extremely careful, do you understand? You have no way of knowing what he will do, or if he's capable of defying any law-related orders he may be given even if he genuinely wants to." Natasha did not care for that somewhat moony expression on Wanda's face. "Don't be stupid. I know you love him, and I don't want you ending up hurt because of it."
"I do not!"
"Mmhmm. Then stop making the dreamy face. The two of you were not exactly subtle that you cared for one another before all of this happened."
Wanda found this a bit puzzling since she hadn't so much as kissed Vis in front of the rest of the team; even in private, she still hadn't. She didn't even know if he would want her to do that and was too nervous to ask him, and she most certainly wouldn't do so without permission first. W-E W-E-R-E-N-T D-O-I-N-G A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G.
"I know, but there was an awful lot of looking like lovesick puppies, cooking together, watching TV in your room, cuddling and hugging, et cetera. And do not tell me you hug some of the rest of us too, because it's not the same. I wasn't born yesterday." Natasha eyed her suspiciously, but Wanda only continued fiddling with the blankets looking uncomfortable. "You two have something different."
It took awhile to explain, but Wanda finally just signed her thoughts, that she didn't exactly trust him, that she was honestly kind of angry, but that she really, really wanted to see Vision herself and give him a chance to explain and tell her why...because stupid or not, she still cared about him anyway.
"All right. That's fair."
"I still don't want you near him until you're capable of defending yourself again," Clint said firmly. "Please don't seek him out. Not by mail, not online, not telepathically, either. Because if he does decide to turn on us, Nat and I won't be able to do much to stop it, and I'm not having Raft crap happen to you again. So no boyfriend for you until you're strong enough to put him through the floor again if you have to."
He's not my boyfriend...is he? Wanda wanted to protest and defend Vision (and also felt rather guilty for putting him through the Avengers Compound floors in the first place before), but she didn't, because she knew they had a point. It would be risky if she somehow saw him right now, and while she didn't believe Vision would hurt her, the scared suspicious parts of her did not want to risk it, either. "Okay," she mumbled finally. At least she no longer believed that her magic was permanently malfunctioning somehow, because it already felt marginally better than before, not much, not enough for her to feel confident she could defend herself easily if they ran into trouble, but still. I don't know how long it's going to take for it to be back to normal, but it's there and it feels more just...hurt like the rest of me than broken now. I can handle that.
"If I grab one of the yogurts I brought from my safe house, will you eat that?" Natasha asked now. She did not want to stuff food into Wanda if she didn't want any, especially because she knew swallowing must be painful for her right now, but she needed to have more than a pudding cup and some juice. "We have some flavored water too now."
Wanda's chin dipped a bit to nod, but she didn't say anything. Yogurt was good. She could definitely eat that. Besides, if she didn't eat or drink whatever she could, then she would probably have to have that IV put back in, which she did not want one bit. Wanda made no protest beyond a stifled pained noise when Natasha gently helped her sit up to eat. I am safe, she silently ordered her racing thoughts, no one is trying to hurt me. Her eyes squeezed shut, trying to prevent herself from crying. Nat was just supporting her broken body, not really giving her a hug, but it felt like a hug, and this suddenly made her feel like crying again. S-O-R-R-Y, Wanda signed as fast as she could.
Natasha handed the yogurt to a worried-looking Clint and really did give the younger girl a hug now. "You're safe now," she said firmly.
"I know," came the quiet reply, muffled in Black Widow's shoulder.
"Okay, good." Nat knew that these tears weren't something to be concerned about. Wanda was not tense, and she seemed relieved that she could have someone nearby holding her and being kind to her. "You tell me when you're ready for the food. Take as long as you want."
Okay. Thank you for everything. Wanda nodded a tiny bit, her fingers going straight to her neck again. Instantly she felt her good hand gently but firmly removed from the injured area with a quiet order not to touch it. "Want...see...how much..." I can tell it's...all over, but I don't know what is there exactly. It just really, really hurts. Though it had 'only' been three weeks, it seemed strange to think that before that, her neck had not been in such constant pain all the time. Now she had been able to have someone take care of the wrecked skin there, and it still severely hurt her.
"It's pretty bad, but it'll heal," Natasha said gently.
H-A-T-E T-H-I-N-G B-E-I-N-G O-N I-T. There were no sharp prongs hot and digging in, no rough collar edges rubbing and chafing her skin, nothing clamped there so tightly it made her feel like she was choking. Logically, she knew this, but all the same sensing there were things there, even if it was just bandages carefully taped in place, made her nervous and on edge. I'm not going to get shocked any more. Don't be ridiculous.
"Understandable. You'd better heal fast then."
Wanda felt Natasha take her good hand and guide her shaky fingers to the edges of the tape, on her collarbone and then near her jawline. She did not protest or even react much, just blinked slowly and tried to relax. Knowing where the edges of the dressings were was helpful.
"Better?" Natasha sounded so hopeful that it made Wanda instantly want to assure her friend that she was completely fine.
But Nat would know if she lied, so Wanda simply said, "Knowing helps," which was true, and nothing else. She nodded when offered the yogurt again. Peaches were good, peaches were bright and summery and made her think about being outside in the sun.
______________
"We're about to land," Natasha announced awhile later. She gently nudged Wanda's shoulder since Wanda had fallen asleep yet again after eating the yogurt. "If you want to stay sleeping, that's fine, but I thought you would want to know what's happening."
I do. Thank you. Wanda did not open her eyes, but she nodded a bit to express that she did want to know.
"You're going to stay here with Steve, just in case something goes wrong. Most likely everything is fine, but let Clint and I make sure we have the vehicle secured safely. Then we'll run back to get you and the rest of the supplies."
Wanda nodded again, thinking it was ridiculous that she was still so tired after...doing pretty much nothing since the big Raft escape. And the more time that passed and she felt more alert mentally while awake, the more she was growing aware of just how much everything hurt. She was absolutely not looking forward to riding in some car for over an hour. If they were in the middle of nowhere, then the roads would probably be terrible. But...it's safe. I'm not alone and I am not on the Raft. It's fine. Not being able to talk very much was fine as long as she had enough energy to sign whatever she wanted to say, but right now she mostly just didn't want to move if she didn't have to.
"Hey, timing couldn't be better. Something going perfectly for us," Steve said a minute later. "Looks like your ride is here right now." The lights from the quinjet illuminated a nondescript charcoal SUV with a red and blue suit-clad figure sitting on the roof waving excitedly.
Wanda strained her ears to hear what was going on, but Clint and Natasha had immediately closed the hatch and she couldn't hear a thing. She sighed and watched Steve pacing the interior of the quinjet.
"I don't think I'd told you thank you for helping Bucky," he said abruptly. "I told the rest of the team, but you were sleeping before."
It was the right thing to do. Y-O-U-R-E W-E-L-C-O-M-E. "Is...okay?" Wanda asked softly.
"Bucky? No, he's not, but at least he's safe in Wakanda. Maybe he will be eventually..." Steve clearly missed his friend anew, and Wanda couldn't help wondering if her mind-based abilities could help Bucky somehow. Could she erase the Winter Soldier programming from the man's head entirely? Obviously she could not do anything like that right now, but selfishly, it would also feel awfully nice if she could actually do something else with those powers besides giving people nightmares or mind-controlling someone.
Wanda kept this idea to herself, because she didn't know if it was even possible and she was quite certain Steve would not want her meddling with his friend's already traumatized head, even to try to help him. Bucky probably wouldn't like the idea, either.
She realized Cap had also just casually told her where Bucky was, too. He wouldn't tell me that if he didn't trust me. So there, Ross, you nasty little excuse of a human.
"Off topic, but for whatever it's worth, I don't believe Vision would ever hurt you intentionally. If you were listening earlier, I suppose you heard what I said about the mind stone. I'm just worried that connection between the two of you will end up being used against you somehow if the wrong person finds out. That's why you need to be careful." Steve appeared quite wistful and happy now, thinking about Peggy, as he went on, "But, I believe you might have a pleasant surprise sometime."
Wanda's expression immediately lit up. V-I-S C-O-M-I-N-G T-O T-H-A-T H-O-U-S-E?
"I don't know, but I believe he might. So...be extremely careful, but also I hope you two reuniting helps you feel better quicker." Steve looked a little pleased that he had gotten her to smile. "I personally think you should tell Nat and Clint, but I didn't mention it, either. That's your job, and I'm trusting you to do the right thing, either way."
That's strange that he didn't tell them. It feels nice to have a decision that's all mine, though. "Okay." Wanda decided she would tell them, obviously, but she would wait a bit and hope her magic began functioning more normally again, because then she could demonstrate that she could defend herself if she had to. It wasn't like the rest of her injuries all needed to be completely healed also in order for her to use her powers properly. Except...that would be selfish. I should tell them now. Wouldn't I be making them worry though...? A lot?
"You want to wait and tell them when you feel stronger, don't you." Steve did not sound as if he were asking a question. "Maybe, just maybe, it might be a good idea to wait a day or two only and tell them anyway regardless?"
Wanda looked away and closed her eyes, feeling a bit silly that Steve knew her mental plans already and she was supposed to be the telepath. "I will."
____________
"Come on, we gotta get out of here fast," Clint said when he returned to the jet shortly. "The spider kid said everything was safe but began sensing something after we landed, so we should hurry up. He's going to hang around the area until we're out of here safely just in case. Nat is with the SUV and the supplies we carried over at first."
"After we landed? He's probably just sensing Wanda and me," Steve pointed out. "But yes, of course we'll hurry. Wanda, you ready?"
No. Wanda stayed quiet, but she nodded a bit. She tensed when Steve picked her up, blankets and all, and like during the first bit of the Raft escape, she hid her face against his shoulder. I am not there any more, she reminded herself yet again, because every time someone picked her up, it caused her more pain, and it reminded her of still being there and things pressing on bruises, her broken ribs, or that battered arm.
"Cap, you're hurting her," Clint scolded.
"I'm not doing anything! What do you want me to do?"
"...Nothing. I know, sorry. I'm just still on edge, that's all."
"I'm fine. I'm fine." Wanda's quiet voice muffled against Steve's shoulder made Clint more worried rather than less, because it was very obvious she was not fine and just saying that hoping he would stop worrying.
"Do you want a sleeping pill or something for the car ride?" Clint asked.
"No!" Wanda said instantly. I don't want anything like that. Right now the very idea of choosing to take anything made her skin crawl. She had had quite enough drug things injected into her to knock her out or sedate her for a lifetime, and obviously choosing to take a sleeping pill was not the same as some weird unknown drug being forced on her, but it felt too similar and she didn't want anything to do with it.
Steve carefully set Wanda down in the backseat of the SUV. "You rest and recover fast. We'll be looking forward to seeing you again soon," he said quietly. "All your forged paperwork and the fake IDs are in that duffel Sam packed for you. Nat will help you get in contact with the rest of us as soon as you're ready for missions again, or even if you just want to talk, okay?"
Wanda blinked, trying to get herself to focus on the idea. Again it seemed so odd to hear Steve sounding so blasé, assuming she would just...heal, presumably in a few weeks, and just go back to doing hero missions as if nothing had happened and none of them were technically international fugitives.
"Steve, let her alone. Tell her bye and get that quinjet out of here before someone potentially sees it," Nat said from the driver's seat. "We've got it from here. I'll contact you soon once we're settled."
Wanda lifted her good hand and waved at him once Steve shut the door. Then she rested her head on the window and closed her eyes once again.
"Stuffed the rest of the supplies in the back, so we're good to go. What about some Advil? It might not help much, but it wouldn't make you feel loopy at least, and it'd be better than nothing. I have that in my pocket," Clint suggested, climbing in on the other side of the backseat and then reaching into the hatchback for some pillows. "Here, let's get that seatbelt fastened and get you some pillows."
The second Wanda sensed something pulled across her body that felt like she was being strapped in place, she immediately began struggling, heedless that it hurt and that she knew, rationally, that it was not some bad thing restraining her all over again. "Get it off. Off, please, I...I don't want any more!" she blurted. A wisp of scarlet shoved Clint away to the opposite side of the vehicle, and she pulled her legs to her chest, clutching her bad arm close, eyes scrunched shut. I'm not there. Not there. Stop it, stop it.
It was dark. Dark and silent and disorienting and that horrible freezing metal table would be there, forcing her to lie still and rough straps holding her down and nobody being there at all and awful old Ross might come back and hurt her further. If he showed up right now she would try to knock him out, collar or no collar. ...I just used my magic a tiny bit. It is not on me anymore. I am not strapped in that awful straitjacket anymore, either. I can too move. Wanda's hand flitted to her neck, just to clarify this to herself. It still throbbed badly and touching it made her cringe in pain, but she didn't feel any rough jabbing collar anymore, just her own damaged skin and the bandages there protecting the burns like before. There were voices nearby. She should listen and figure out what was going on.
"...did you think would happen?!" That annoyed, concerned voice was Natasha. Driving. Sitting in the front seat.
"I don't know! I didn't think it was a good idea not to have seatbelts on, after all." That worried voice was Clint, sitting next to her.
Wanda pulled herself into a tighter ball, making herself as small as possible against the car door as she rested her head on her knees. They are right here. I'm not imagining them like I did Pietro...right?
"She probably felt like something was restraining her all over again. Wanda, you are safe; you are not on the Raft anymore. We're on the way to the vacation house. You're riding in a car with Clint and me." Natasha continued speaking calmly, describing the vehicle and what they were doing. "Reach and touch Clint or me when you can. You can move. You have friends with you. You are not isolated alone or restrained somewhere. This is a safe enclosed space, not a threatening one."
...I think I used my magic and pushed him away. Why did I... "'m sorry," Wanda whispered finally, though she still didn't move, embarrassed that she had reacted like that over a stupid seatbelt. A seatbelt. Why on earth had she panicked? I knew only Clint and Nat were in here, and I just...I freaked out.
"Don't you dare apologize," Clint muttered. "I should've realized that might happen." He moved to the center seat so that Wanda was sandwiched between the door and him and she couldn't fall over, and he could easily just use an arm to brace her if they had to stop short or go around any sharp turns. "Are you okay now?"
No, but...I don't feel all irrationally scared anymore, either. Wanda didn't answer, but she hesitantly leaned on her friend rather than the car door, her knees still pulled to her chest. Clint was warm, and solid, and he would protect her. The panicking and breathing hard and struggling made her broken ribs and her arm hurt even worse, and she could feel herself shaking, trying to hold back tears. They are not going to judge me or hurt me for crying, and it's dark. They can't even see the tears, Wanda thought silently.
"Kid, you're going to tear your ankle up more or hurt your arm further sitting like that. Try to relax and stretch out. There's room," Clint said quietly. "You're gonna be fine."
I don't even care that he's calling me a kid. I feel like one anyway. I hate me. Wanda jerkily uncurled herself from her tense ball, but she still didn't say anything. She felt a pillow slide beneath the injured arm and then Hawkeye putting his own arm around her shoulders. It was fine, fine, she absolutely did not need to attempt hiding fear or pain anymore right now...right?
"You're safe. I'm sorry I scared you. Try...try to sleep. We'll get there as fast as we can." Clint did not bother asking if the girl was okay; it was obvious she wasn't, but he wasn't sure what else to do for her. Wanda was not panicking anymore, but he was pretty sure she was crying and hoped no one would notice.
Wanda did willingly accept the offered Advil and water a minute later, though she had trouble swallowing the little pills, which just frustrated her further. Half the water bottle was gone by the time they finally went down successfully. "...Thanks," she whispered. Wanda did not particularly believe Advil was going to help her very much, but maybe it would at least take the edge off. Anything would be better than nothing, but she would rather be in pain than feel all drowsy, sluggish, nauseous, or a mixture thereof.
"Nat, slow down, we don't need to get pulled over," Clint said now, which Wanda found a bit funny.
"I'm going three over; nobody gets pulled for three over. We need to get there as quickly as possible. I don't like us being on the road out in the open like this right now." Natasha didn't want to be paranoid, but sometimes being paranoid would save your butt. Having herself, Clint, and Wanda in a vehicle would look far too coincidental and suspicious if they did get pulled over, even if whoever pulled them didn't recognize the trio in any way. They had too many supplies, not all items one would normally take on a trip. Wanda looked like she should be in a hospital, and that ring of wounds covering her neck was too distinctive of an injury pattern to claim some accident easily if someone realized what it was. She did not want to attempt explaining away any of that.
Luckily the rest of the trip was uneventful aside from a brief tense moment when Natasha noticed blue police lights behind them...but then the cop car zoomed past chasing down some other vehicle, and it turned out they hadn't been in any danger of being found out in the first place. "Almost there. Just up this winding driveway and we'll be safe," Nat announced.
Wanda tensed at all the bumping and jostling as they went up the gravel driveway, but she simply bit her split lip and said nothing. Clint kept his arm around her, and this hurt did not make her upset like before; this was okay. So close. Just have to get inside and then I can yank covers over my head and be in bed and stay there and sleep.
_____________
"You're here! I'm so glad it worked," a woman Wanda recognized as Clint's wife Laura exclaimed the second she opened the door at the vacation house. "I've put the kids to bed, but they know you're getting here tonight, so don't be surprised if Lila and Cooper get up anyway. They're very excited."
"Hey, honey. You are a sight for sore eyes," Clint greeted Laura, sounding exhausted himself. "Where's Wanda staying? I just...need to make sure she's safe. Right away."
Laura did not know all of the exact details of everything that had led to this setup, though she had a pretty good idea. Looking at the injured young Avenger clutched in her husband's arms said enough on its own. "She's going straight upstairs, same as the rest of us. Wanda, Lila wanted you and 'Auntie Nat' to stay in one of the big bedrooms next to hers. Would you mind that?"
Wanda liked the little girl very much, and knowing Lila had been actively looking forward to her and Nat arriving made her happy. She shook her head slightly, her expression much more chipper than it had been minutes before, even though she didn't smile, either.
"Aw, she didn't want her daddy staying next door to her, did she?" Clint joked, following Laura upstairs.
"Now, Clint. Of course she's excited to see you too. She knows the three of you being here is a secret unless I inform her otherwise, but I thought it would be better for her and Cooper to know you were coming, so any excitement on their part could be blamed on having a vacation, not...three rogue Avengers staying here with us. They're used to keeping secrets, after all."
They headed up a flight of hardwood stairs and down a hallway that smelled in a way Wanda could only describe as woodsy. She wondered what the outside surroundings must look like; she knew they were in upstate New York and there were mountains, but that was it. Laura opened a door to a large bedroom and that revealed two guilty-looking but excited pairs of eyes staring from their owners' perches on the two beds. The two children immediately ran for Natasha and pounced on her with a hug.
Clint carefully set Wanda down on one of the beds while Cooper and Lila were occupied. "You opened that busted lip again," he scolded, and immediately grabbed a tissue from the nightstand.
"I'm fine...really," Wanda whispered, but she took the dumb tissue and pressed it to her split lip anyway, because it would probably make him feel better. Wanda was much more at ease seeing the children hopping around excitedly and knowing this place was, in theory, quite safe. She did not need to be on edge and hyper-vigilant, scared that something else terrible was going to happen any second here...at least not at the moment. A bleeding lip did not bother her.
Lila, finished with pouncing on Natasha, happily hugged her father next, and then scrambled up on the bed next to Wanda. "Are you okay? Can I see your magic? Please, please, please?" The little girl did not pounce on Wanda with a hug, obviously knowing doing that to her would hurt, but she scooted closer, gazing at Wanda hopefully.
"Lila, not now, sweetie. She needs to rest," Clint said firmly. "Maybe another time, but only if she wants to."
I could show her something tiny, at least, Wanda thought, but she really didn't feel like tearing any more bits of scarlet free at the moment, and Clint had given her an out, so she just gave Lila a smile. "I can tomorrow," she said quietly.
"Okay!" Lila sounded so excited that Wanda was immediately reassured that had been the correct answer, though both Clint and Natasha were eyeing her suspiciously.
"Was it the bad guys on the TV?" Cooper asked, sounding very invested. "Mom won't let us watch the news anymore. Did you get hurt helping Dad and Auntie Nat catch them?"
Wanda stared at the child, unsure what she was supposed to say to that or what Laura might have told Cooper or Lila to make them understand why their presence needed to be a secret. She could hardly explain to two little kids what had really happened, and even if she was told she could, she would not traumatize them by sharing those things.
Clint took Cooper into the hall and bent to his eye level. "We're not gonna discuss the news. Do you know where we were before we came here, Coop?"
"A prison, which is stupid," Cooper proclaimed confidently.
"Okay, well, there were some bad men at that prison. Those are the people that hurt her, and it's not nice to talk about. Do you remember the bullies in your class at school you told us about a few months ago? These are just adult bullies."
Cooper appeared to understand, but then he made a face. "You told me I should defend myself if they bugged me anymore."
"I did, yes. And then I told you that you might have to take a few punches, too," Clint said quietly.
"Yeah..."
"Are we going to ask her any more questions about it?" Clint asked.
"Yes," Cooper said solemnly, "but only once and don't keep asking the same things over and over after that because it would be rude. And I should wait until she feels better."
Clint sighed. "All right, but if she says she doesn't want to talk about it, you drop it entirely, Coop. Understand? Promise."
"I promise."
"Now go back to bed. Auntie Nat and I need to unload the car."
________________
"Lila, bedtime," Laura said firmly. "They'll still be here in the morning."
"Can I sleep in here?" Lila asked hopefully. "I want to have a sleepover. A big, grownup Avengers sleepover." Lila sounded quite pleased with this idea.
Wanda thought she would not mind if little Lila stayed in the room as long as she was quiet and didn't bounce on the bed. "I don't mind," she whispered.
"See, she doesn't mind! Auntie Nat, do you mind?"
"I think maybe another night would be better," Natasha suggested. "We still need to unload the car and you should be asleep. But, you could ask your mom if you could stay until we're done unloading before you go to bed," she finished, knowing quite well that Wanda genuinely didn't mind Lila being in the room and that, if anything, Lila being present was helpful. Wanda wasn't smiling, but she didn't look so tense or upset now, either. Like when she had been around Lila previously, the little girl helped Wanda relax simply by being nearby, and Wanda seemed to like children in general anyway. The few times she'd been recognized in public before by kids, she made it clear she did not like having her picture taken at all, but she also willingly spoke to the children and would show them her magic upon request.
"Can I stay?"
"You may stay only if you promise not to disturb Wanda," Laura said. "No bouncing on the bed, no more asking for magic. Do not climb on her, either."
Wanda watched the two women leave, which left her alone with Lila. Nat actually left me alone for a minute or two. That...feels okay. She had not expressly said whether she felt okay being left alone temporarily, and it was kind of nice to know nobody minded her being left unsupervised with a little kid.
Lila did not bounce on the bed or ask to see magic, but she did sit next to Wanda, hugging a plush deer tightly and staring at her. "I like you and Auntie Nat. Mama said there were bad men at the prison you and Daddy were in, and Auntie Nat and Captain America were getting you and Daddy out. Are you okay?" She was eyeing the bloody tissue Wanda was still holding.
Wanda nodded, thinking that for once she did not feel like saying yes to that question was lying. Lila looked concerned, but in an innocent little kid sort of way; she didn't know about all of the inside hurts and even if she did, Wanda did not believe for a second that Lila would treat her any differently whatsoever.
"Why did the bad men hurt you and not Daddy? Because, he looks fine. He's just tired."
"I..." Wanda closed her eyes briefly, trying to consider how to answer that. I know why. And I can't tell Lila any of it. "It hurts to...talk," she finished lamely, hoping Lila would drop it. Luckily Lila seemed to understand, and she simply curled up next to Wanda, saying she shouldn't talk then and she would totally feel better in the morning. Thank you, Lila. I'll come up with some kind of explanation for you...hopefully. Wanda dropped the tissue in the small trash can next to the nightstand, and hesitantly put her good arm around Lila, who was mumbling something now about wanting to watch a movie tomorrow, clearly tired despite her excitement before.
Wanda's eyes drifted closed again, grateful to have little Lila with her. Thank you for staying with me, thank you for not making me feel like a shattered broken thing even if I am just that. Sensing something was wrong, Lila lifted her head sleepily and spied a tear trickling down the older girl's bruised face.
"Safe now," the little girl said firmly. "The bad men aren't here." Though she did not really understand the specifics of whatever happened, she knew enough to understand that this was not the same as when her daddy returned home hurt from one of his missions and just wanted to rest a bit. This reminded her more of when Auntie Nat had appeared on the farm with Wanda last year. Something was hurting her heart inside again. Maybe Wanda was crying because she was injured, the same as when Lila skinned her knees, but Lila didn't think so. "Is your heart hurt again?" she asked innocently.
Wanda's eyes flew open, and she stared at Lila, instantly knowing what the child meant. She knew no one had given Lila any details of what had been wrong with her then, but the simple reasoning somehow made sense, and wasn't wrong, either. Rather than lie and say 'no I'm fine', she simply said, "I don't...know." I don't feel like I did last year, but I know there is still something wrong with me. Wanda didn't want to worry Lila, but something prevented her from lying, some tiny bit of her that wanted to scream for someone to fix her, even though she didn't like exposing those feelings at all. Lila would still treat her the same as always.
Lila did not ask anything else. She merely nestled herself closer, saying that was okay.
______________
When Natasha returned, she found the younger Avenger and the little girl both fast asleep looking peaceful and happy. She draped a blanket over both of them and silently padded back into the hallway. "They're both asleep," she said softly to Clint and Laura. "If you don't mind, maybe Lila can stay, if that's all right. I don't really want to wake Wanda up again if we don't have to."
"Of course," Laura said quickly. "Lila did want to stay anyway. I just didn't want her disturbing you and Wanda trying to get some much-needed rest."
Clint peeked into the room and immediately felt like some heavy weight had fallen from his shoulders. Seeing his little daughter again and the much-older surrogate one together and genuinely appearing content made him feel much better. He did not have to wait months or years to see Lila again; she was right there. Wanda still looked like she had been through hell and back, but she also appeared quite happy resting now, protectively hugging little Lila. "They're okay," he said, voice rough. "Nat, take care of them," he added a second later, abruptly going off to his own bedroom he and Laura were going to use.
"I'll stay with them," Natasha assured him.
Laura sighed and ran a hand through her hair as the other bedroom door clicked shut behind her husband. "I assume the Raft was, in fact, even worse than Tony Stark implied. I did wonder why on earth he would go to all this trouble so quickly to help the...other side, shall we say."
"Yeah, whatever you're picturing, whatever he told you, it's worse. The place is a hellhole," Natasha said honestly. "They were using threatening to hurt Wanda to attempt getting the rest of the team to talk."
"She looks like she's been tortured, Nat. Not just threatened."
"Because that's accurate. Cap and I found her barely conscious in there. She's not sick, at least, but...she's not in good shape, either. That prison really put her through the wringer. Tony can't possibly even know just how bad the conditions were, because I'm sure he was shown a somewhat sanitized view when he visited the Raft, and there was no security footage of the interrogation room being used, only the cells. I even looked. I don't know everything, either."
Laura glanced at the two sleeping girls again and then back at Natasha. "Whatever he saw when he visited, sanitized view or not, disturbed him enough to actively help, even though he's so angry with Cap, and still doesn't trust Wanda. He wouldn't tell me any details."
"They were keeping her restrained in a shock collar and straitjacket at all times, even when they weren't interrogating her. Tony saw that much, at the very, very least. That would be enough," Natasha said softly, "especially when said collar was his prototype invention."
"That's..." Laura sighed. "Well, yes, I suppose that would do it. How is she doing?" she asked, gesturing at her own head. "Especially after why you made her come to the farm last year."
Nat sighed. "That, will be a work in progress. All things considered, I think she's doing better than expected, honestly, especially after seeing her in that place. I think being here will help, too. She'll just need some time."
_______________
Natasha silently slipped back into the room and climbed onto her own bed with her laptop after confirming both Wanda and Lila remained asleep. First she sent an encrypted message to the rest of the team as planned, saying that she, Clint, and Wanda were safe. Steve was still not the best with technology, but she had made sure he would do this much safely before launching the rescue so that the group could communicate after splitting up. If he had issues, he could always just ask Scott or Sam for now.
Then she sighed and put in her earbuds, accessing the security footage they'd pulled from the Raft. Someone needed to go through it, and pull any helpful evidence clips. Starting from the date stamp when the four rogue Avengers arrived, Nat found herself already growing angry. There was nothing from the Raft entrance-she hadn't been able to pull that also, and figured the cell block would be more useful with limited time to grab videos-but it appeared trouble had started the moment of arrival if these were anything to go by. The first word that popped into Nat's head was unnecessary. Scott, Sam, and Clint each had one guard escort. Wanda had two, despite her unique restraints. All four of them were shoved into individual cells much more roughly than need be. The boys had their ordinary handcuffs removed and their cell doors slammed shut. Wanda was left in her restraints, and she immediately fell upon being pushed into her cell since she couldn't catch herself.
Nat could tell Wanda was carefully surveying the guards as she chose one to request water from and instantly judged the other as one she didn't like. However, the guard she talked to sent his coworker to fetch it, and he wasn't happy. Upon returning, he stalked into the cell, slammed a tumbler down on the bench, and stalked out again. Natasha frowned, watching the footage continue as the collar clamped around Wanda's neck went off and sent her seizing to the floor. There didn't seem to be any reason at all for anyone to have done this, and it didn't look like Wanda had tried to use her magic, either; her eyes weren't even glowing.
Nat rewound the footage a bit, searching for something, even if it was just Wanda giving the guards a death glare. But no, Wanda remained sitting still and was not doing anything at this moment. Natasha reluctantly continued perusing the footage, noticing when Wanda evidently figured out she could message Clint telepathically, feeling oddly satisfied knowing that whatever other things happened in that prison, no one had ever realized that Wanda could do that. The lights never dimmed for the night-that was worth a note. Wanda barely slept, and then was cruelly jerked awake by the collar activating again, from a bad dream or a guard doing so intentionally, Nat couldn't tell from the video. Clint shouted about this, Sam tried to calm both of them, and Scott somehow remained asleep for several seconds after Clint began shouting.
This was the first night, before any of them were questioned at all, Natasha thought darkly. It would only get worse, so Nat decided to stop once she reached morning and the measly breakfasts were delivered. Then she grew annoyed because one member of the team hadn't been given even that, only more water. She made another note with the timestamp in a document before closing the computer and glancing over at Wanda, who remained sleeping placidly with her good arm around little Lila. Can't undo any of what already happened, but I won't let it happen again, period.
Notes:
they are safeeeee, finally! At least for awhile:)
Heh, yes I will have Vision show up sometime soon. Writing romance is not my strong suit at all, but I'll do my best since him and Wanda are one of the very very few ships I'm actually invested in.
I know Wanda is kind of sleeping on and off a lot at the moment, but I figured she would after everything that's happened. She's not fine, she's hurt, but she also has friends there with her, so she'll be okay. I do not find it believable that she or the others would escape the Raft mentally unscathed and I'm trying to...show that, I guess? Like Clint isn't physically hurt, but he's being extra overprotective and such, along with feeling snappy and worried. The seatbelt in the car made Wanda panic temporarily (yes, we'll revisit that since obviously she can't just permanently avoid those...). Etc. Anyways.
Next chapter coming soon!:) Comments/feedback are much appreciated, I love reading them!
Chapter 7: Chapter 7
Summary:
In which Wanda, Clint, and Nat mostly just get some downtime at the vacation house with Laura and the littles.
Notes:
“all the friendship fluff but make it serious” kind of was the vibe I felt while writing and editing this chapter. Lol. I hope that you enjoy it:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda woke to soft rays of morning sunlight filtering through the filmy light blue curtains in the bedroom. Safe. I am safe with Nat and Clint and his family. I am not in that hellish prison anymore. I just...still don't feel well. That's fine, I'm fine. Next to her Lila still lay sleeping clutching her somewhat ratty-looking plushie. There was an unfamiliar but warm blanket draped over both of them, and Wanda realized she and Lila must have fallen asleep on top of the covers the night before while the others were unloading the SUV, and no one had wanted to disturb them.
The other bed in the room looked rumpled, but Natasha was not in it. Wanda could hear water running in an adjoining room, so she assumed Nat had gone to the restroom and would come right back. A rustic-looking ceiling fan spun languidly overhead. Glancing around the room, she saw a large TV on the wall in a good spot for easy viewing from the beds, some braided wood artwork on the walls, her own duffel bag in a blue rocking chair, one large dresser, and an entire shelf of DVDs against another wall, probably nearly as tall as herself.
Wanda thought she hoped there were some old sitcoms in that DVD collection.
"Morning," Nat greeted her when she came back a moment later. "Did you sleep okay?"
"I...did." Wanda sounded surprised at the realization, but it was true. She couldn't remember any bad dreams disturbing her (and then setting that collar off), weird noises waking her up, or anyone shouting on purpose to startle her awake. And there were no bright lights that never turned off. I did wake up multiple times because of pain, but it wasn't frightening, and I fell back asleep quickly. I knew where I was, Lila was next to me, and I could see that Nat was asleep in the other bed. So it was fine. This did not constitute a messed-up night's sleep to her, not after all those days of so little sleep. Waking up in pain was unpleasant, but she couldn't bring herself to care when she was lying on a soft bed under a warm blanket, nothing restraining her or making her feel like she was choking.
"Did you wake up at all?" Natasha asked.
Wanda hesitated but slowly nodded. N-O-T D-I-S-T-U-R-B-I-N-G. K-N-E-W I-M S-A-F-E.
Nat thought this probably meant Wanda had woken up simply because she was in pain, not because of a nightmare or something similar. "How many times?"
Wanda held up four fingers, which was the truth.
"I think it might be a good idea to take something stronger than Advil before you go to sleep again, if you're waking up multiple times during the night because of pain," Nat told her firmly. "And don't say you didn't say that."
D-O-N-T W-A-N-T, Wanda signed quickly.
"I know you don't, but please think about it. I'm not going to make you take anything, but I think you should." Nat figured it would be better to let Wanda choose than to make her take anything and risk causing her to distrust everyone. At least she was safe and resting now. "Laura said last night she'd bring breakfast up this morning, so I'll stay here with you for now, and then she or Clint can stay with you while I go down and clean up the kitchen."
They shouldn't have to do that, Wanda thought, but she didn't say anything about that. She could always make up for all this special treatment once she felt a little stronger. What she did sign was that they had been willing to leave her alone with only Lila the night before.
"I probably shouldn't have done that anyway, but you seemed happy with Lila there, and I figured she'd yell for us if necessary. If she's awake, wants to stay, and you don't mind being alone except for her, that's fine. But Lila is sleeping right now, so no, I'm not leaving."
Wanda rather wanted to protest that she did not need babysitting, but that sounded childish, and she didn't really want Natasha to leave her alone anyway.
There was a light knock on the door, which was just Laura with the breakfast. "We have scrambled eggs, biscuits, and sausage. I made you a fruit smoothie, Wanda, but if you want to try the rest too, there's plenty. I wasn't sure what you felt like eating. I can also get applesauce, jello, grits, flavored oatmeal, pudding...whatever you like, if you want something else soft instead."
Logically, this did not really sound ridiculous or over the top; Wanda knew Laura would offer the exact same things to her own children or anyone else if their throat hurt, but it still...seemed out of place after everything. I didn't even tell her my throat hurt. I suppose it was easy to assume, or Clint or Nat told her, but... "Thank you," she whispered, trying to sit herself up. Instantly Nat was next to her, stacking extra pillows behind her and to support her splinted arm, though she didn't make any fuss, either.
Lila finally stirred at the movement and happily sat up, eyeing the breakfast hopefully. "Yum. Hi, Mama! I got to stay in here all night," she said, very pleased.
"Yours is downstairs, pumpkin. Let Auntie Nat and Wanda eat in peace. Then you can come back later," Laura told her.
Lila looked like she might protest, but then sighed very deeply and did as she was told, but not before giving both Avengers a hug. Then she willingly followed her mother downstairs.
Wanda did not dare pick up a full glass of smoothie at the moment, worried she would just drop or spill the whole thing, but Nat seemed to know this already. The little breakfast-in-bed tray went on Wanda's lap, there was a straw in the smoothie, and then Natasha let her alone to drink it herself without help. "...Thank you," Wanda said again, happy that she hadn't needed to ask for anything one way or the other. Then she felt all teary again, which seemed stupid to her. But Laura had made something special just for her, because she was hurt, and then offered to go get her something else entirely if she wanted it on top of that.
Nat moved the tissues within Wanda's reach, but didn't address the tears. Oddly Natasha rather thought it was probably a good thing Wanda wasn't trying to hold the tears in, because that also meant she felt safe enough to allow herself to be visibly upset. She sat on the edge of the bed with her own plate and began eating her own. It was such a relief that the journey to the vacation house had gone so smoothly. Probably something would go wrong sooner or later, but at the moment, their little group was safe. "If you do want any of the rest of this, you tell me."
Wanda shook her head slightly. The eggs and sausage looked appetizing, but the idea of trying to swallow it made her cringe and want to throw up, especially the sausage. The biscuits had potential, but she didn't want any of the rest. "Smoothie's enough."
"Finish all of it, then, unless you start feeling sick. When we're done eating, we need to change those bandages, and then you can sleep more, read, watch TV, whatever you like."
"Done... nothing but...sleep," Wanda said quietly, sounding a bit frustrated, tears gone now. At least drinking the cold smoothie helped make her throat feel better and therefore easier for her to talk, too. I want to do something. Something useful. And...not think about the Raft. Now that she did feel alert mostly again, even though she was still so weak and exhausted, she knew she wanted some kind of distraction to occupy her thoughts, because otherwise she would probably break down or something, and not just the normal tears, either. Wanda eyed the duffel bag sitting in the chair. No wonder Sam and Steve had been all blasé about returning to team missions; they knew before she did that she wouldn't just...retire. I can't stop entirely whether I want to or not. That's my job, and I want to do it for Pietro.
"You need sleep. You'd need extra sleep even if you had just been hurt from an accident rather than being tortured." Natasha followed Wanda's gaze to the duffel and sighed. "We're not doing any missions until you're back to normal, period. And you'd better be prepared to bail regardless of whoever you're teamed with. I won't take you on any jobs with me if you can't promise that."
Wanda's gaze snapped back to her friend, surprised at the seemingly abrupt topic change, since she hadn't mentioned anything of the sort. "Why...?"
Nat eyed the younger girl suspiciously. "I'm not sure what you're asking about, but I know you could have escaped the airport if you'd run when Clint told you to. You went and tried to free Sam and Scott instead."
Is Nat saying I should have abandoned everyone? I don't get it. Wanda stared at the Black Widow in confusion, her good hand shakily stirring the straw around in the smoothie. "You want me to...abandon the team?"
"Of course not, but I do want you to keep yourself safe. Don't look at me all baffled like that. You were holding back, and you know it. You let them capture you. You were exhausted and running out of energy, but not helpless. I'm not taking you on any missions if you're not ready to defend yourself." Natasha searched Wanda's face, hoping the words wouldn't send her spiraling into a panic again, but Wanda only closed her eyes, a single tear trickling down her cheek. "I'm sorry. I am not blaming you in any way for being trapped in that prison. But I know quite well your abilities run on instinct and emotion and they're heightened when you're...stressed, shall we say."
"And harder to control," Wanda muttered, half just to herself.
"Yours function on instinct all the time. You've done well learning to channel that instinct over the last year. I just don't think you're doing everything you can in a fight when it's only to protect yourself." Natasha set her now-empty breakfast plate aside and sighed.
Do you want me to use mind tricks then? Because that is the main thing I am "not doing" under ordinary circumstances... "It doesn't matter," Wanda said now, and then added via signing that she'd thought cooperating was the right thing to do.
"Maybe right to cooperate before, because you didn't know what they were going to do to you and hoped you'd be treated fairly. Now you know they will not. Circumstances change. Now you protect yourself. Now, yes, you leave the team if you absolutely must, because you are in far more danger if caught than any of the rest of us." Nat paused, watching her younger teammate staring at her. She's not going to listen, she's never going to listen... "Did you really wait six days to make an escape attempt simply because you didn't feel you had a decent chance of success sooner? Or was it because you were hurt and felt you needed to lash out finally? Because frankly, I doubt that was the best moment to try."
Wanda looked away and took another sip of her smoothie, her eyes tinted red. "I don't know. It wasn't...planned." She hesitated, unsure how to explain herself, or why she'd waited, or what had made her finally risk doing something...and then get herself into even more hellish trouble by doing so. If she tried to explain, it probably would not make any sense, especially because even now she was not one bit sorry for the escape attempt. She was sorry she hadn't planned better before doing so, but not for trying and failing. "Ross was just...he claimed..." Wanda switched again to signing slowly to continue that he had thought she had power access, and she hadn't been thinking straight to plan the escape properly.
"Do you mean that he was going to continue hurting you anyway if you didn't do anything with your power?" Nat asked calmly, glad that Wanda seemed to be willing to discuss what had happened a bit. Certainly keeping all of it locked inside wouldn't be good for her. "So you just decided to attempt something else with it?"
Wanda's shaky hand touched the burns on her neck, her expression clearly haunted and angry. "It didn't...matter what I did," she whispered. Then why should I not try? I'd rather go down fighting than do nothing. I D-O-N-T C-A-R-E. G-L-A-D I T-R-I-E-D. Then she glanced back at Natasha, eyes bright with tears and a few tiny red wisps of magic crackling on her fingers wrapped around the smoothie glass. "I am sorry for...many things. That...is not...one of them."
The glass shattered suddenly, making both Avengers jump. Shards of glass sprayed across the tray, the blanket, and onto the floor.
"I'm sor-"
"No, don't be sorry for this. It's almost gone anyway. Stay still and I'll take care of it." Nat quickly took the tray and broken glass away from Wanda. "There's more shards on the blanket, so I'm going to take that too, all right? I'll find you another one, or you can get under the covers instead."
O-K.
They heard a knock on the door and then Clint asking if they wanted to see baby Nate. Natasha sighed and went to the door. "We do. Sit with her while I clean up this mess. A glass broke, that's all. Somehow she's too shaky to hold a glass, but still shattered it in her fist," she glanced back at Wanda, who was studying her palm, seemingly surprised at whatever she saw there. "Make sure she didn't cut up her hand doing that."
Remembering that Wanda had also used a tiny bit of magic to push him away from her in the car on the way here, and that it had been because she was upset, Clint frowned as he went over to her. "What happened?"
Wanda gave him a look. What do you think happened? I was upset and messed up, that's all. "I'm fine, look," she informed him, holding up her hand. There were a couple of new small scratches across her palm and fingers, but nothing that anyone would expect from crushing glass in one's fist. Wanda thought her magic must have shielded her hand somewhat, even though she hadn't consciously chosen to use it at all in the first place.
"She just has a couple new small scratches, Nat. No cuts," Clint reported. Partly because he was concerned and partly because he was curious, he asked Wanda to make a fist and punch him.
"I...what?"
"You heard me. Look, we'll let baby Nate sleep over on Nat's bed for a minute. Hold on." Clint set the sleeping baby down on the other bed, putting pillows around him so he couldn't potentially roll off, just in case he couldn't grab Nate in time. Nate continued sleeping, thumb firmly planted in his mouth.
Wanda stared at Clint and then at Natasha sweeping up the glass shards, who appeared to be pretending not to hear the conversation, though Wanda thought she saw Nat smiling a little. "Can't," she muttered reluctantly after a moment.
"Then we will know. Do it once without using your powers, and once with."
Wanda made a very familiar stubborn upset face and folded her good arm across her middle, holding the injured one protectively. I don't want to do that. I can't punch anything right now without using any power. It would be like barely poking something. And if I did yank more magic free right now...then I might hurt him. Still, if she didn't, then they would probably just become more concerned. Wanda slowly closed her hand into a fist and reached out. As predicted, she could not put any actual force behind the motion, and she gave Clint a very displeased look. T-O-L-D Y-O-U.
"Now, with your power," Clint told her.
"Don't want...hurt you."
Good. She thinks she can, Clint thought, glad to hear that reaction rather than Wanda saying she couldn't. "Hey, I'm the only Avenger that's taken you down in a one versus one. You won't hurt me."
"I'm insulted, Hawkeye," Nat deadpanned, now simply holding baby Nate herself and watching. "All of us have beaten Wanda solo many times training."
"Not when she's using her magic. She just royally sucks at sparring when she's not using it. Otherwise, she's a little squishy powerhouse. Give her a shield to hide behind permanently and more experience and she'd be unstoppable."
"So, you want Wanda to chuck you out the window?" Natasha looked at Wanda and nodded toward Clint. "Guess he wants you to. Better get it over with."
Wanda found this conversation amusing because it was so accurate. She was, admittedly, not great at fighting without using her powers, though she was much, much improved from a year ago (mostly thanks to Natasha's lessons). She looked down at her hand, closed her eyes, reaching for the scarlet inside. It still didn't want to do anything, but she ripped a bit free anyway and threw the wisps in her hand directly at Clint. Instantly he was flat on the floor, and Wanda worried she'd maybe used too much until the archer began laughing.
"Well, I wasn't expecting that right now," Clint said, but he sounded happy. If Wanda could do that already, that was good and he was somewhat less concerned that she wouldn't be able to defend herself anytime soon. Obviously someone meaning to harm or capture Wanda was not going to stay still within arm's reach and just let her sucker punch them with her powers, but still.
"Serves you right," Nat said, laughing herself. "Too bad we didn't record that."
_________________
Wanda found herself sitting with Lila for most of the day after Natasha had changed her bandages. The little girl had promptly returned once allowed to do so, generously sharing her stuffed animals and claiming they were going to make Wanda feel better. Well, the stuffed animals don't, but you do, she thought to herself.
She dozed on and off, not really paying much attention to the monkey cartoon Lila had chosen to watch-"it's for babies but I like it anyways," Lila had said pointedly. Just having Lila sitting with her was a welcome distraction to her.
Cooper brought her a popsicle twice, though he decided not to pepper her with questions, even though he really wanted to. He seemed to have concluded Wanda's throat hurt like when he had gotten his tonsils out, and she did not correct him.
Nat didn't try to make her talk about the Raft again, but other than a quick walk outside to investigate their current safe area and cleaning up the breakfast dishes in the kitchen for Laura, she chose to remain in the same room with Wanda, saying she'd stay with her. Wanda didn't protest this. Though she did like having some alone time, those memories of being trapped alone, hurt, in the dark, made her grateful to have a friend simply sit in the same room with her. I don't want to talk about it, but I'm glad someone is here all the same.
Every so often Clint stuck his head in the door, usually with baby Nate in his arms. He claimed he was just checking to see if she wanted anything, but Wanda was suspicious he was more just wanting to reassure himself that she and Lila were safe.
______________
That night, Wanda woke up in a cold sweat, unsure what exactly had awoken her. Dream. It was just a bad dream, she tried to convince herself, but something else was bothering her, and she didn't think it was just her own anxiety this time. I sensed something. Something... intruding. Whatever it was seemed to be harmless, but she was still uneasy. What if there was something bad in the house and she couldn't tell? Or something or someone had sensed her there?
Or my powers are just going haywire, Wanda thought. The scarlet "core" of magic in her chest seemed to be stirring about nervously inside, but it still didn't particularly want her to access it, either. You are not on the Raft, she ordered herself. You need to calm down. I'm not trapped in that room again, I'm not tied up or strapped down somewhere, nobody is hurting me, if I want to talk I can, I can use my powers if I want to. It just isn't functioning normally yet, either. She hesitantly touched her neck again, trying to reassure herself that there was no shock collar there choking her any longer. "I'm fine," she whispered aloud. "I'm fine.”
Finally Wanda simply reached to turn on the nightstand lamp, wincing as the motion strained her ribs. In a second, Natasha was awake and out of bed, asking what had happened. "I...don't know-I-I think..." she stuttered awkwardly. I don't know what happened. Probably nothing. With the light on, Natasha standing right there, and knowing quite well she'd had a bad dream and that was at least part of what had disturbed her...saying she felt like something was intruding in the house seemed ridiculous and illogical. "Nothing," Wanda mumbled after a moment.
Nat frowned. She'd seen Wanda have nightmares before, and this wasn't the same. "What did you think you felt? You might have had an unpleasant dream or otherwise scared yourself, but that's not the only thing bothering you." She edged to the windows and sliding glass door to the deck-like balcony porch outside, peeking through the curtains to the darkness outside. "Could you have maybe heard an owl or something like that?"
I don't know. Wanda didn't know what to say, thinking she had completely overreacted and woken Natasha for no reason at this point. She knew her powers were not working normally right now, so it was dumb to assume she had really sensed anything wrong. "Maybe. I...I just..." F-E-L-T L-I-K-E I S-E-N-S-E-D... "Something," she finished lamely. "...Intruding?"
"Well, better safe than sorry. I'm going to check the house." Natasha fished Wanda's taser out of the duffel and put it right in her hand. The girl instantly dropped it as if it had burned her. "Then you'd better be able to access your own power quickly," Nat said in a softer voice, thinking that Wanda probably did not want to use or touch it because of the association with electrical shocks. "Can you knock someone out right now if you had to?"
"...I think so."
"Not good enough. Up you come." Nat picked her up quickly enough that Wanda had no chance to protest, and took her across the hall to Clint's and Laura's room.
"Thought I heard something," Laura said sleepily. "What's going on?"
"Good, you're awake. I'll be right back, I'm just double checking the house." Spotting an empty oversized chair, Natasha gently set Wanda down there. "Tell her what happened."
Wanda blinked, still thinking this was an awful lot of fuss over what was probably nothing, but she also knew Natasha was right: they needed to check just in case. It would be a bad call not to investigate, "safe" house or not. She pulled her knees to her chest, holding onto the immobilized arm protectively again. Why am I so jumpy now? It's just Laura. She brought me food and drinks multiple times and has always been nothing but kind to me. I shouldn't be scared.
"Do I need to wake Clint up?" Laura asked when there was clearly no explanation forthcoming. "I'm guessing one of you heard or sensed something strange and just want to make sure it's nothing?"
Wanda nodded slightly, shoulders tense. "Don't...don't wake him up," she whispered. He needed sleep too. If Laura woke him up now, he would get all concerned and upset-snappy again. She was fine. Laura was gazing at her with concern too, and it was unsettling as much as it was simultaneously nice and frustrating that there was another person concerned. My mother is dead. Laura is not my mom, she's Lila's, and Cooper's and Nate's. I'm not a child anymore. I'm FINE. Pietro would tell her she was being ridiculous and she should just take the kindness if they could have it somewhere.
"Well, tell me if you change your mind. I'm not going to be offended; you know him and Nat better. I told you that when Nat first brought you to visit us on the farm last year. You are safe from judgement here too." Laura thought Wanda rather did look like a frightened child at the moment, staring at her with those big green eyes, and having three kids of her own meant she wanted to protect this one too, even if Wanda was technically not a child.
Wanda nodded again and relaxed slightly. Yes, she did remember that. Natasha had taken her to the Barton farm after about a week in the Compound post-Ultron and losing Pietro, because she'd caught Wanda dumping herself off the roof. She was still surprised the older Avenger had actually caught her successfully. Wanda remembered begging Nat not to tell the others afterwards, terrified that they would send her back to Sokovia or otherwise kick her off the Avengers team entirely, and she had nowhere to go. The Black Widow had told Hawkeye and no one else, though Wanda was pretty sure Cap knew too, because when she came back, Steve gave her a hug and said if she felt like that again she should tell someone. Then he let her be and treated her the same as usual, other than randomly asking 'are you doing okay?' once every so often.
Pietro would not have wanted that for her; her twin would want her to live and surely it would be selfish to attempt that again when Pietro had died saving someone. Wanda did not make any more attempts after that, though she still found those dark thoughts flitting through her head on occasion. Laura had immediately been welcoming and seemed more than happy to have her around until she was ready to return to the Compound. The woman never treated her any differently whatsoever; she never felt like Laura found her disturbing or bad or anything of the sort. I didn't mess up and hurt all those people at Lagos before, either. It's not the same anymore. "I killed people," Wanda said abruptly, her voice so quiet Laura could barely hear her.
"I'm not going to judge you for the Lagos incident. I don't care what is on the news. That was the terrorist's fault, not yours or Steve's."
Wanda had a sudden realization that actually made her boiling, stewing mad. If that horrible Secretary Ross is on the news making himself look like the good guy... She closed her eyes and tried to express herself calmly. R-O-S-S O-N N-E-W-S? she asked, her signs stiff and disjointed.
Laura could tell that Wanda wasn't merely scared of this man; she also actively, adamantly loathed and despised him, she would want to shred him if provoked again. Clint did tell me as much. "I think you'd know that whether you watched any news channels or I told you or not."
W-A-N-T T-O S-E-E.
"I don't think that's a good idea. Do you really want to see this man's face, even just on TV?" Laura knew from Clint that this man in question was responsible for most of Wanda's current state, and whatever tortures he hadn't directly done to her himself, he'd at best tacitly approved of it or let it happen. It seemed a bit too personally invested behavior-wise, considering Ross must have other responsibilities besides tormenting ONE person in his efforts to locate the fugitive Avengers. Laura suspected the man disliked enhanced individuals in general and Wanda happened to be the unlucky victim he had access to. Either that or she had simply scared him and he wanted to break her, which clearly had not worked at all; Wanda might be frightened and hurt, but she was also angry.
"...No." I just hate not knowing. Wanda hesitated, debating whether to ask Laura what she really wanted to know. Ross was no mystery; she could imagine what he was saying and doing. Tony was a mystery to her, and she thought Laura could probably clear some of it up. C-A-N I A-S-K S-O-M-E-T-H-I-N-G?
"Of course you can."
Wanda slowly asked via signing what Tony Stark had told Laura when organizing this vacation house thing. I have to know. I don't want to talk to him, I don't want to see him, but I have to know. The second she was finished signing, her fingers went to her neck again.
Laura gently pulled Wanda's hand away from her neck. "Try not to touch it. You'll make it worse." She considered how to answer the question before saying anything, not wanting to say the wrong thing and make Wanda more upset than she already was.
"...I want...truth," Wanda said firmly. "Don't...leave things...out."
"You are sure you want to know now? Not in the morning, or when you feel better?"
"Positive." Wanda made this rueful expression as she signed that she could definitely handle hearing whatever it was after being in that horrible place for weeks.
That's exactly why I don't want to tell you anything that might make you upset, Laura thought, but Wanda wasn't going to drop this, and not telling her anything would probably mean she would mull over possibilities in her head imagining the worst until she was told. "He called me, asking if the kids and I wanted a free, all expenses paid vacation distraction. I told him no. That initial offer was actually before he visited the Raft, so I assume he must have felt guilty because Clint wasn't coming home. Then I...ran into him while picking up some groceries a few days later. He said he'd made a bad call and I could help him fix it. At that point, I knew something else was wrong. So I agreed to come here with the kids, figuring at worst then they would just enjoy having a vacation. When we arrived, he was here with Pepper..." Laura trailed off; Wanda was starting to look more and more perturbed.
"Please..." T-E-L-L M-E.
Laura sighed deeply. "He told me all of you were on the Raft and the conditions there were unfair, law-breaking or not. That he knew the Vision had sent coordinates to Steve, and that Steve and Nat were planning a breakout and he wasn't going to stop it."
Wanda looked very unimpressed, her expression slightly disgusted. Big deal he wasn't going to stop it, when none of them should have been sent to that underwater hellhole in the first place. This especially bothered her when her three fellow teammates thrown in there weren't even enhanced like Steve or her. They should not have been in the Raft in her opinion, regardless of what they'd done.
"Anyway, he said he believed you were being harmed more than the others, partially because of something that he had created, and there needed to be a safe place to stay for awhile since he knew he would never be able to negotiate any kind of house arrest on your behalf, period."
"Knew. He knew," Wanda said pointedly. There was zero doubt in her mind that Tony must have known that much, even if he had no idea of the details. Simply seeing her should have told him that much, and he should know considering that horrible collar had been a Stark creation too. She had even flat-out told him she was being tortured. But, she had probably just sounded...snarky about it and so he thought it wasn't that bad or she was exaggerating. Wanda knew she hadn't been very nice to Tony when he'd visited the Raft, though she was not particularly sorry for it, either.
Laura's voice was soft when she spoke again. "He did know, and he feels guilty. Clint and Nat have both told me about the collar. I'm glad you're here safe now after all...that."
"Can we stop?" Wanda asked, her shoulders tense again. I don't want to talk about that. Maybe another time, but...not now. Thankfully, Laura seemed nonplussed and willingly dropped it. In fact, she almost seemed to have expected a can we stop? reaction.
"Of course. You can ask for more information or simply vent whenever you'd like." Laura didn't say anything else and just sat there in silence with Wanda until Natasha returned a few minutes later.
Natasha was smiling. "So, I think you did technically sense an intruder, Wanda," she reported, still looking relieved and entertained. "I found a couple raccoons in the garage, digging through the garbage. Nothing else, though."
Wanda felt more dumb than amused, waking up and freaking herself out, and then waking up Natasha and Laura too...over some raccoons getting into trash in the garage. She drooped in her chair and made a face. "I'm sorry," she muttered.
"What for? I'd rather find some trash pandas than a human intruder. Or nothing, for that matter, because then we wouldn't know what set your powers off. This way we have an explanation," Natasha told her.
Maybe so, but I still feel stupid. My powers would NEVER make a mistake like that normally. Wanda didn't say anything, but she nodded. Nat did have a point, and she was glad there was at least a tangible explanation.
"Let's all go back to bed."
______________
In the morning, Wanda decided she absolutely needed to tell Natasha what Steve had told her about Vision potentially coming to visit. The "intruder" incident the night before made her certain that waiting any longer would be a poor decision on her part. She waited until she was done with her breakfast smoothie (in a plastic cup this time, not glass) and then said she needed to tell Nat something.
"Do you want to tell me before or after we change those bandages again?"
"Try...while." I want it over with, and I want a distraction. Wanda hated anyone touching her neck right now, not so much because the burns hurt, which they did, but because it reminded her of other things she was trying to avoid thinking about. Yesterday she had started crying and shaking uncontrollably, scaring both of them.
"I'll go as fast as I can. I'm listening whenever you're ready." Nat gave Wanda's good hand a squeeze. "Just try to hold still."
"Cap told me he...thought Vis might...visit here," Wanda said slowly. "And that..." she abruptly stopped talking, clutching a fistful of her shirt in her fist. Okay. I need to shut up for now. Talking seemed to be making it hurt more rather than less, distraction or not, and the damaged skin temporarily being exposed to the air again made her want to cry like she had the day before. I'm safe. I am not there anymore. I am just with Nat, and she's trying to help me.
"You're doing fine. If you need to cry, it's completely okay. No judging here. I rather thought he might tell you something like that, so I'm not surprised. But, I'm glad you decided to share that information anyway." Natasha shook her head and went on, "I told you before that I don't believe Vision would intentionally harm you, but again...you need to be careful. If he does show up here, I don't care how innocent it seems, you be prepared for the worst." Privately she hoped Vision at least wouldn't show up until Wanda was on her feet again, even if she wasn't entirely back to normal.
"He might n-not...love me...anymore."
Natasha frowned and shook her head, wondering what exactly Wanda meant by that, especially since that was a switch from Wanda's claims before that she did not either have romantic feelings for him. "If he doesn't, that is his loss, not yours. I see you gave up arguing that you don't care about each other that way."
Wanda's cheeks turned pink. I shouldn't have used that word. I don't even know if Vis really does...love me. It just came out. She didn't bother denying it this time; Natasha wasn't teasing her, and was quite serious. Then she had a vain thought, wondering if those painful burns were going to scar, and felt that was silly too. Except, that was actually not silly, because distinctive burn scars like she was imagining would make it more difficult to hide her identity once she had to leave the vacation house later. Maybe it just hurts and they don't look as bad as they feel, she thought hopefully.
"The burns look like they're healing a little bit already, at least," Natasha said quietly, seemingly mirroring Wanda's worried thoughts. "You're sure you don't want any other pain meds? That Advil you've been taking isn't helping. I can see that much." Wanda didn't seem scared like she had been yesterday, but her expression was drawn and tense, and her eyes were bright with tears.
"I just..." Wanda did want something to help her feel better, but the idea of taking anything that would alter her senses or otherwise make her drowsy or sluggish, anything of that nature, still made her anxious. I don't know. I don't want anything, but... "It's stupid."
"Taking medicine when you are in pain is not stupid. You're not on a mission where you need to stay alert right now. You're safe, you don't have to do anything at all." A sudden, disturbing thought struck Natasha. "Are you trying to punish yourself for something?"
I don't know. I don't know, I don't know. Wanda stared at her, not knowing how to answer that. Hadn't she had enough pain and horrible things in her life? She was not either trying to punish herself for anything...was she? That didn't make any sense; why would anyone do such a thing? I just don't want anything because I'm scared of how it makes me feel. Right? D-O-N-T K-N-O-W.
At least she's being honest, Natasha thought. "Well, I'm going to bring you something else to take when we're done here, and I want you to try it. Once. If you can honestly tell me any mild side effects you get are worse to you than the way you feel now, then you don't have to take any more."
"If I...do that, you won't...leave me?"
"I won't. I promise."
"...Okay." I do trust Nat. She won't make me take more if I'm willing to try once and I really hate it. It will be fine. Wanda lay very still while Natasha checked the cuts on her side and her injured leg too, which was not a big deal at all to her compared to her neck. Those cuts still hurt and stung, and she didn't like not remembering how she'd gotten them, but letting Nat see them was only mildly unpleasant to her. That original bullet graze from the airport fight probably would be healed entirely by now if it hadn't been reopened multiple times since. In any event, touching those things didn't scare her in any way, nor did it hurt as much, either.
"Do you mind telling me how you sprained your ankle?" Natasha asked now, making sure to add that Wanda didn't have to share if she didn't want to.
Wanda actually scowled, but then shook her head slightly that no, she didn't mind. "I fainted." There was no disturbing story to that one beyond that; she'd just been trying to get her usual water tumbler and fallen while doing so. "Dizzy, weak, fell."
Nat wondered if there was more to it than that, but even if there was, it didn't seem to be something that disturbed Wanda like her burns did. She didn't press further. "You're probably okay to try using it a little bit as soon as you feel strong enough, but you'll still need to take it easy for awhile. Don't overdo it."
"I won't." S-O T-I-R-E-D, Wanda admitted. Like I could sleep for a year. And I wish my magic would go back to normal already. For all the problems her magic caused, she despised knowing it was not behaving normally, because dangerous or not, knowing she could do something to protect herself if necessary was reassuring to her. "Done nothing and..."
"Good grief, we've been here barely two days. How much sleep were you getting on the Raft? Very, very little. You rest as long as you need to, period." Natasha shook her head and added, "And don't copy my behavior from when you have seen me injured."
This made Wanda smile finally. Thank you for getting me out, thank you for staying with me. "Thank you for...caring...but not...fussing." Not treating me like broken glass and willing to tell me the truth. And telling me if I do mess up.
Natasha rummaged in her own suitcase for the medicine and brought it back over to Wanda. Predictably now she said she didn't want it, even though her expression looked the same as it had a few minutes before again. "Wanda, you agreed to try once. I don't like you being in that much pain when you're just laying there not even doing anything. That is concerning. You didn't say anything, no, but I can tell."
"I can handle it."
"Yes, I know you can, but if you can't rest properly, it's going to take you longer to recover. Would it help if you read the list of contents and potential side effects?"
Wanda thought for a moment and then shook her head slightly. While she did trust Natasha not to give her some weird unknown thing to harm or otherwise disable her, she still didn't like not knowing exactly what it was, either. But she didn't feel like muddling through reading English right now, either, not weird drug names she wouldn't recognize anyway. I could read the potential side effects though. I don't care what it is called...I just want to know what it will do to me. With that in mind, she signed that she'd changed her mind and yes she would like to see.
Armed with this information, Wanda felt a little less disturbed by the idea, so she reluctantly took one of the little pills with some water. Then she stayed perfectly still, staring at the ceiling and waiting for unpleasant things to happen anyway, even though she didn't want to just...expect that. Nobody had grabbed her by the hair and stabbed some needle into her neck again. This ceiling did not have those headache-inducing bright lights on it, and she was lying on a warm, soft bed, not a cold, hard floor. She shivered anyway, pushing herself against the headboard of the bed so she could sit.
Natasha frowned, wondering what exactly was wrong; Wanda did not appear to be panicking, but she had her good arm anchored across her torso holding her injured one, looking far too similar to how she had spent those weeks restrained in that prison. And she was staring in a calculated, oddly antagonistic, defensive manner Nat knew, from the security footage, that Wanda had done often on the Raft, attempting to make people leave her be. "You are not there anymore," she said firmly. "You don't have to do that."
I know. I don't even feel any different than a minute or two ago. It doesn't work that fast, I'm just scaring myself. Wanda still felt cold and shivery, which seemed silly to her now, because she knew this room was not objectively cold. She wanted to say something, explain that she knew there was nothing to fear but she was scared anyway, but the words didn't want to come. I can't even talk. Why can't I talk? If Pietro was here, he would already know what was wrong with her and probably tease and give her a hug...and want to go find whoever had harmed her. Remembering she did not, in fact, have that straitjacket restraining her arms anymore, she finally just signed in a jerky manner that she was sorry but words did not want to work right now. Then she started fiddling with the splint on her left arm, because that was also preventing her from moving and that unnerved her too. Stop it. Calm down. If I did rip that off me, it will make it worse, not better.
"Wanda, leave that alone, please," Natasha said firmly. "You don't have to talk, that's fine."
Wanda stopped pulling at it but kept holding her elbow, staring at her friend. I am not there. Nobody stuck some...thing I don't want in my neck. I can think, I can process English properly. She watched Nat pull a folded comforter out of the wardrobe and a hoodie out of the duffel Sam had packed for her before. Natasha laid both out on the bed within easy reach. Wanda gave her a questioning look.
"You seemed cold," Natasha said simply, "so pick one, or both if it will help."
Wanda blinked slowly a few times and then slowly let herself relax again. No one was even putting something nice on her without permission, let alone something awful. She reached for the hoodie, couldn't get her splinted arm through the sleeve, and then there was someone helping thread her shaky arms through the sleeves and saying calmly what was happening. It took a moment for Wanda to realize that Natasha had spoken Sokovian to her just now and that hearing it made her feel better. "Хвала вам," she whispered now. Thank you.
Natasha was glad her instinct that speaking Wanda's native language to her might help seemed to be accurate, because at least Wanda had finally said something. She still didn't seem like her normal self, but that defensive expression had vanished and she wasn't holding her arms in the awkward restraint position anymore, either.
"Can I come back in now?" Lila called from out in the hall.
Nat looked at Wanda, who immediately relaxed further and nodded. "Yes, you may, as long as your mom doesn't mind."
"She said I should ask you."
"Then you may come in."
Lila immediately galloped in and flung an armful of stuffed animals on the bed. "Let's watch Curious George more. The baby show I really like," she announced. Then she pounced on Natasha with a hug, scrambled onto the bed herself, and gave Wanda a much more careful hug. "Auntie Nat, play the show please."
Wanda did not care one bit what Lila wanted to play on the TV right now. Lila hugging her kind of hurt, but it also made her feel better, too, because Lila's presence helped ground her to her actual surroundings, rather than her own jumbled anxious thoughts latching onto little things that scared her needlessly...like taking the pain medicine. I am safe. I have friends here with me, she reminded herself yet again. She closed her eyes, no longer feeling cold or jumpy with the fleecy hoodie on and both Natasha and Lila being in the room.
The sounds of the TV didn't bother her, but Wanda didn't pay much attention to it, either, sensing herself slowly growing drowsy and a bit lightheaded, which she hated, but also...she wasn't in nearly as much pain, either. I hate this feeling, but I think it would not be so bad at night. I would be sleeping anyway.
"Will you make Roxie float?" Lila asked now, holding up her small plush deer. When Wanda only blinked at her and didn't answer, Lila began looking worried. "Are you okay?"
"Lila, she took some medicine that helps you feel better but can make you a little loopy. Maybe ask her later," Natasha suggested, thinking it was probably not a good idea to have Wanda using her magic while doped up on pain meds. At least she seemed at ease now and not so tense or frightened anymore.
Small wisps of scarlet lifted all the plushies on the bed, and Lila clapped happily, which made Wanda smile. Then all of the stuffed animals flew over to Natasha's bed into a pile. Lila began laughing, and squealed when she went levitating in the air too. Nat stared at the two of them, not particularly wanting to ruin their fun, especially considering Wanda was happy and smiling too, but this did not seem like a safe plan considering Wanda had said previously that her magic wasn't functioning normally. "Wanda, can you put Lila down, please?"
"But I like flying," Lila protested.
Wanda seemed to abruptly realize what she was doing and gently deposited the little girl away from her on Nat's bed instead of hers immediately. "...'m sorry." I am not thinking right. She blinked, wanting the floaty cloudiness to go away. A familiar voice was saying to stop fighting falling asleep and that it was safe to do so. Wanda didn't particularly want to go to sleep again, but tried to obey. Lila was back again a moment later, just sitting next to her watching the TV now.
"Hey, is everything okay in here?" Clint asked from the doorway. "Things in Cooper's room just started...floating while we were playing a board game. Toys only, not clothes or books or anything else." He knew it must be Wanda's doing, and that was fine if she had done it intentionally as a joke, but if it was an accident, he was concerned.
"Wanda floated the toys! And me," Lila announced with great relish. "But Auntie Nat told her to stop because she took medicine."
"Nat, what did you-"
In a second, Natasha had pushed him into the hall. "Took long enough to convince her to take anything and then for her to calm down once she did. Don't mess it up, will you?"
"What did you give her?" Clint asked, thinking that, like Wanda thought herself, she had had enough drug things in her system recently. "She looks all dopey again."
"I gave her a Vicodin tablet, that's all. Clint, she was tearing up from pain, and you know how much it takes for that to happen. She's been waking up multiple times at night because of it. It's not like she can't be trusted not to abuse the stuff when she doesn't want it at all in the first place." Natasha sighed, glancing back into the bedroom again. It appeared that Wanda had finally let herself fall asleep, and Lila was contentedly sitting next to her watching TV.
Mollified, Clint nodded. "Thanks for taking care of her. Sorry I've been snapping. I assume the floating stuff just happened because she was a little loopy, then."
"Definitely. Nothing harmful happened at all, but I didn't think it was a good idea to let Wanda do that while she's not completely alert, so I asked her to stop, which she did. She's fine."
"She's not fine and you know that."
Natasha gave him a critical look. "Considering everything? Yes, she is. It's only been a couple days. Give her a chance. Just because she's not bouncing back immediately doesn't mean she won't be okay. I've gotten through the first three days of footage so far, marking time stamps and such. Considering what I have seen, especially knowing the worst of it isn't on video at all and I haven't reached the worst parts, she's doing just fine now."
Clint's expression crumpled a bit. "We couldn't protect her. I never even saw her except for when we were taken into that stupid torture chamber. Sorry, interrogation room."
"I know."
"Assholes were taking up what I assume was a couple hours or more nearly every single day with that."
"I know that too. I see the time she's missing from the cell block and can assume what was going on."
"They never did much on the rest of us. Oh no. Let's throw the one girl around instead. Worst that happened to one of us guys was someone punched Sam because he kept trying to get her some help after she fell on day 17. Not even rude or shouting about it, just calmly asking. I think she couldn't stand and she fainted. If you two hadn't come for us two days later..."
"I'm sorry Steve and I didn't get there sooner," Natasha said quietly.
"You shouldn't have signed. Nobody should've signed. Forget all the public relations and whatever else. We could have lost her, and nobody would have noticed or cared except us."
"Do you think I don't know that?"
"You signed, you knew they'd go after her, and maybe if we'd had you on our side in the airport from the start, she wouldn't have been taken!" Clint kept his voice down, because he did not want Lila or Cooper to hear him shouting, but he was frustrated and angry. "You got out of there, even after helping Steve and Bucky escape. You could've run off with Wanda and kept her safe, and you left her behind. I don't care that you left the rest of us, I would've told you to, same as I told her, but not her."
Natasha was clearly upset now. "Clint, what did you expect me to do to get her out? By the time I knew what was happening, those strike teams were already on top of her. With helicopters. At that point you know darn well it was a better idea to stay away and plan a future escape with actual decent chances of success, rather than go in guns blazing alone and get all of us killed. Lose the battle to win the war later. You told me that yourself, everyone knows it, good or bad."
"The same reason she shouldn't have tried to escape herself on day 6," Clint muttered.
Now Natasha's eyes sparkled a bit. "That was because of bad planning due to being injured and hungry, not because she absolutely would fail no matter what. I didn't tell her because then she will think purposely putting herself in danger is acceptable, but I'm proud of her anyway."
_____________
Wanda slept on and off for most of the day again, immediately deciding once the pain meds wore off that she did not want any more of it during the day. At night...maybe. It was nice to not be in so much pain constantly, but she would rather have that than the floaty lethargic cloudiness that still genuinely disturbed her. At least at night, she would want to be asleep and that weird drugged feeling wouldn't bother her if she was already asleep anyway. When she told Natasha this, the older Avenger was completely unsurprised.
"That's fine. I'm glad you were willing to try. There's some applesauce and blueberry oatmeal here for dinner when you're ready. Same as usual, if you want more, or something else entirely, we can get more or find something else."
"No, this is fine." Wanda felt a bit refreshed now, after more uninterrupted rest most of the day, and she realized that yes, she really did want something to eat. "Did I...do something bad earlier?" she asked hesitantly. I think I used magic on Lila, not just her stuffed animals. I don't really remember.
"You did not do anything bad at all." Nat told her exactly what had happened, Lila asking for her to make a stuffed animal float, and then floating all of the plushies-and toys over in Cooper's room evidently-and Lila herself. "I asked you to stop since you weren't really alert, not because you did anything wrong. None of us know just what you're capable of, and it seemed a bad plan for you to be playing with your abilities not entirely choosing what you were doing consciously, especially after you told us your magic wasn't functioning properly. But you and Lila seemed quite happy."
Wanda knew what was actually being left out: that she could have potentially revealed their location messing around carelessly with her powers if she'd done something larger, or spread effects outside over a larger area, or something else similar. Even if what she was doing was harmless, like levitating things, that could get the entire group into trouble. Frustratingly, her magic still did not feel right at all now, so clearly however those painkillers affected her body, it made those enhancements feel better too. Out of curiosity, she tore a handful of red wisps free and let them swirl around her hand for a moment before dispersing them. "It still...hurts," she murmured, disappointed.
"Considering it's part of you, it does make sense that taking stronger pain meds would also make your powers feel better," Natasha pointed out.
Maybe, but then why do I feel like it's me that locked it up? Wanda felt more like something dense and heavy had smashed that power into submission rather than that it was just hurt like the outside of her. When she thought about using it, it stirred a bit and then cowered in her chest, spinning and churning like her mind did with those bouts of anxiety and panic...except then there was also the sensation that it really did want to help her and do what she wanted. Forcefully tearing bits of it free regardless hurt. This was deeply unpleasant and made Wanda feel like it was some odd manifestation of her own fears.
Explosive. It's locked down because I probably want it to be, Wanda realized abruptly. Because I am choosing between shoving it down and ruining more things. The magic doesn't know anything in between.
What if she physically could not contain herself any longer? Made another destructive mistake like she had in Lagos? That thought made her feel ill, along with a sickening suspicion that she had probably not needed to remain trapped in that prison for three weeks being tortured at all, and that some dark broken bit of her thought she deserved every minute of it, even as she tried to escape and thought she had convinced herself this wasn't right. She could have killed her tormentors in that interrogation room instead of tossing them against the wall and making them fall asleep. She could have ripped Damian's head off during the rescue, but instead she had mind-controlled him to help. And why had her subconscious instincts when not thinking straight been to immediately access the mind-based abilities she wasn't supposed to use at all?
I don't know what I'm capable of at all.
"I think I'm...going to be...sick."
Notes:
*continues poking at hinting future power levels* Besides doing that, I've also tried to show the disconnect between her and her teammates' skillsets. She genuinely doesn't have the training they do, she runs on emotions/instinct, etc. And right now she's hurt badly enough she can't even get up on her own, but her magic is still there and it, in fact, could still defend her if necessary.
Lila's deer plushie's name is totally stolen from one I had when I was little lol.
Vision will show up-finally!-chapter after next, by the way!:)
Any comments/feedback is much appreciated!
Chapter 8: Chapter 8
Summary:
In which there is more friendship fluff x angst, Nat receives some texts from someone that wants to see her again very much, and Wanda decides she wants to try practicing in an effort to “fix” her suppressed magic as she slowly starts to feel a little stronger. But mostly more angsty friendship fluff.
Notes:
Thank you for all the support on this story so far. Here is the next chapter:)
I also just want to mention that I am using Serbian from google translate for anything Wanda says in Sokovian, so I apologize if any translations are inaccurate!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
There had not even been any mess since Natasha had whisked her into the bathroom quickly enough to avoid that, but Wanda still found the incident embarrassing. S-O-R-R-Y, she signed yet again.
"Will you stop apologizing for throwing up? It didn't even make any mess. Flushed right down the toilet. It's fine." Natasha was far more concerned that Wanda might have hurt herself further doing that than anything else, and she also suspected Wanda had made herself anxiety-sick, not food-sick. "Here, put this on your face for a minute."
Wanda accepted the cool washcloth but didn't actually do anything with it, just sitting very still in the corner of the bathroom on the floor squeezing herself into a ball. She blinked, staring at Nat silently.
"Wanda, what's wrong?"
I don't know. I don't know I don't know it hurts and I don't know how to fix it and I'm not there anymore but I am broken and I can't think right- Wanda instinctively jerked her hand away when touched, and then realized she had just done that to her friend, not someone trying to hurt her further. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
"Okay, I won't touch you. Your eyes are glowing and you seem...crackly, like your power wants to do something, so I know something is wrong. We'll just sit and wait awhile, then." Nat could tell Wanda either wouldn't or couldn't talk right now, and glowing red eyes were not a good sign either. She simply sat across from Wanda within arm's reach without trying to touch her in any way again. "Let me know if you need anything else. For now, I'm just going to sit here. Is that okay?"
Wanda's head dipped briefly to nod, and she closed her eyes, trying to ignore the tears burning in them. Why was Nat still staying there now? It was one thing to take care of an injured teammate, quite another to deal with her getting so anxious and freaked out that she had made herself sick. I should be able to...not be like this. It's not even the first time. After a minute or two, she dropped the washcloth and signed, S-O-R-R-Y. I W-O-N-T U-S-E I-T O-N Y-O-U, not wanting Natasha to think she was going to poke around in her head again or something just because her eyes were glowing red.
"I know you won't. If I put a bit of soap on that washcloth, do you want to rinse your face a bit? It might help." Natasha was relieved to receive another tiny nod, and Wanda shakily fumbled for the cloth and held it out, her eyes still screwed shut. "Hey, I don't mind seeing the red eyes, it's okay."
It is? Wanda still did not open her eyes, but she felt minutely better. Probably they weren't glowing anymore anyway. Mostly her ribs and throat just hurt quite a bit more than what was usual now, and it had scared her, reminding her of being in that place all over again, even though she knew she had caused the pain herself by throwing up. There was not anyone hurting her here, no one entertained by watching her seize on the floor or cry by accident. The cool tile floor did not help, either, and she shivered, pushing herself farther into the corner. Stop it. I am not there anymore. I'm not.
...that's where I'm supposed to be, not here, shaking on the floor with someone trying to take care of me. Stupid. What is wrong with me? I don't want that power any more. I don't know what to do with it. I don't even know how to find out what my real limits are.
You could handle it better if you weren't such a mess. Come on, you know those dead people in Lagos weren't really your fault. It just feels like it. Let your friends help you, Wanda. Just because I'm not there doesn't mean you have to shut down. You know this. We didn't have anyone but us. You have a very real family right there willing to help you.
There's something wrong with me.
There's something wrong with everyone, not just you. You should explain what happened so they can help. I'm not really there, you know.
I know. I will sound crazy.
Does it matter? Friends do not care about that. Those are your friends. They won't care. They might even have felt like that before themselves, you don't know. Wanda did finally open her eyes, feeling all too aware that she probably shouldn't let herself retreat into her own thoughts like that if she could help it, but Pietro was not here now, and imagining that he was...helped. "Can't...talk," she forced out finally. H-U-R-T-S. There. At least Nat would know why she was not saying anything and that she was trying her best not to freak herself out any further.
"That's fine. You don't have to. I'm going to give you the cloth again. Is that okay?"
Nod.
"All right. Don't scrub your face, just pat lightly." Natasha was hesitant to let Wanda do that herself, because the girl probably would rub at her skin hard right now, being frustrated and upset with herself. Thankfully, Wanda seemed to listen. "Okay, give that one back. Here is a dry towel. Now pat dry. Then I need you to look at those cuts on your side and make sure you didn't tear them up throwing up. I will turn around, but I'm not leaving you alone, either. You can tug my arm or something when you're finished if you can't talk yet."
The simple instructions helped give her something to focus on. Wanda nodded a bit and slowly did as she was told. I don't think I tore anything open. It just...hurts. Everything hurts. I wish it was just the physical hurt. I'm so, so tired. I try to get better, do something right, and something just...yanks me down again. When she hesitantly tugged her friend's arm, Natasha immediately turned back around, so she just signed that she thought it was fine and her ribs just hurt worse right now.
"Can you breathe okay?" Nat asked, thinking that the answer probably was yes; Wanda's breathing did not sound strained-she just had that anxious pained expression still on her face.
Wanda nodded. She did not want to take deep breaths right now, but that part was okay. There was a familiar voice asking if everything was fine. Clint. He's in the bedroom and if he knows what happened, he is going to be upset.
"We will be," Natasha said firmly. "Will you bring us the juice box from the nightstand, please?"
Wanda swiped at her eyes, trying to get rid of any residual sign of tears, but she knew the second Clint saw her sitting on the floor in the bathroom, he would know quite well what had happened, even if he didn't know why. Sure enough, he knocked on the open door, came in, and instantly looked mad and upset. I-M F-I-N-E, she signed quickly.
"Then why aren't you saying it out loud?"
Nat sat back down cross legged on the floor with the juice box in hand. "Clint, chill. She felt nauseous, that's all, she'll be okay. Wanda, please sip this. I'm going to go reheat the rest of the dinner if that's okay."
Wanda nodded again and accepted the juice. Clint was not going to leave her there; she did not have to be alone regardless of the scolding, depressing niggling in her head that they should?all leave her alone. So there. Shut up. I'm not listening to those thoughts. I won't.
"I know you're not fine. You don't have to pretend...don't do that on my account." Clint frowned, not liking that Wanda didn't really react much and just continued slowly sipping her juice, her good hand still shaking a bit.
I don't want him to not be fine himself, that's all. Wanda still remembered Nat telling her the guys weren't fine either, and while she knew it wasn't what Natasha had meant for her to take away from the conversation, she also knew much of the problem was simply from watching her be hurt in that prison and not being able to do anything about it. She had probably made that worse for Hawkeye by talking to him telepathically so often. Between that and the fact I literally made him feel how awful I felt, too...I messed up. I really messed up. Setting the now-empty juice box on the floor, she signed, I K-N-O-W I M-A-D-E I-T W-O-R-S-E F-O-R Y-O-U.
"You didn't make that place worse for me or the others. The guards and Ross made it worse, not you. Heck, even that permanent harsh lighting sucked, and that had nothing to do with you whatsoever," Clint told her.
Wanda didn't smile, her expression remaining neutral, signing that bad lighting would not make him upset, just tired. I'm not stupid. I know quite well that prison would not be run well whether I was there or not, but I also know he would not be acting all...weird now if I hadn't been there, or even if I had just been treated exactly the same as the rest. We would have just all been grumpy and tired...and probably very bored.
Wanda also knew if that had happened, if she had been given a normal cell and not been kept constantly restrained like that the whole time, she would have gotten the team and herself out on her own very quickly. At that point, all that she would have needed to do was wait a few hours, maybe a day or so at the absolute most, for her energy to replenish from the airport fight and that was it. There was a very, very real reason she hadn't been treated the same as the rest, and knowing that was frustrating.
She nodded when Clint asked if she wanted to go lie down again, and didn't say or sign anything else until she was back in her bed. The warm blankets helped too, and she did not feel so shaky and sick anymore. Y-O-U K-N-E-W, she signed finally.
"I knew what?"
W-H-A-T W-O-U-L-D H-A-P-P-E-N T-O M-E T-H-E-R-E. And that is why you tried to make me run and abandon everyone in the airport.
Clint scowled and perched himself on the edge of the bed. "I knew you wouldn't be treated fairly. Not...as bad what actually happened, no, but I suspected they would at best have some kind of unique restraints to hold you. You would get out immediately otherwise, and probably be able to get the rest of us out too. The rest of us are ordinary people, really, when we're not suited up or armed, except you and Steve, and of the two of you, it's a lot easier to see exactly what Steve can and can't do with his enhancements. Yours have very unclear limits and applications, and people get scared of what they don't understand. Worse, you are a girl and you're not an American citizen, which are more reasons for assholes like Ross to be unfair. So yeah. I knew immediately regardless of where we were taken that you being there would be bad. Look, if you hadn't been in there, I'm sure Sam, Scott, and I would've been smacked around a little more in those interrogation sessions than we were. But they were never going to put the rest of us in those inhumane restraints 24/7."
Wanda blinked and just stared at him. They literally couldn't put me in a normal cell with normal monitoring or whatever. If I'm a criminal, what were they supposed to do with me if they actually cared about treating prisoners decently? She did not know how to answer that question, even to herself. W-O-U-L-D E-S-C-A-P-E. T-H-E-Y H-A-D T-O.
"They did not. There was absolutely no reason for any of that nonsense to be going on. If all they were concerned about was you escaping, then..." Clint trailed off, remembering what had happened during the successful escape. She'd temporarily created a bulletproof shield across the elevator. She'd mind-controlled Damian into helping them. Sure, doing the latter had knocked her unconscious, but still. Even the failed escape earlier on was more proof the girl was most certainly not as restrained as it seemed. And she had been speaking telepathically to him all the time until she couldn't from being too weak and hurt to continue. Clint suspected she could have manipulated the guards by doing that if she really wanted to, simply by disturbing and confusing them, without mind-controlling them at all. The Raft personnel was very lucky Wanda was not really some malicious murderous criminal, no matter what the law said right now, else she would have caused much more damage than she had simply trying to escape.
Now Clint thought he wished Wanda did unleash everything she had in that place, that he had told her to do it and to hell with cooperating or anything of the sort. But he'd been so worried someone would kill her the more she fought back, and what happened after the failed escape attempt appeared to confirm that fear to be legitimate.
Wanda's green eyes glinted sharply. "See?" Y-O-U K-N-O-W T-O-O. Clint knows as well as I do. He's just being biased because he cares what happens to me.
"Wanda, the point is if all they cared about was containing you, there was no need for ANY of what was happening at all except for putting that torture device on you in the first place. You shouldn't have been constantly tied up like that, the collar was way too tight, I could go on and on. It also could've been made as an ankle monitor or a cuff bracelet instead of a collar. That would still suck, but it would have been far better than what happened."
And then I'd be studying it constantly until I figured out how to rip it off, Wanda thought darkly, knowing quite well if that had happened, she also might have simply broken her own bones on purpose to pull herself free. Or taunted Ross into hurting her so she could do so. It would work, too; she was sure of it. She couldn't do anything like that with it locked around her neck. D-I-D T-O-N-Y T-E-L-L Y-O-U B-E-F-O-R-E...M-A-D-E... Wanda's fingers went to the bandages on her neck, her green eyes shining with tears again.
"No, he most definitely did not. If I'd known he designed that thing, I'd have chewed him out for it and taken you back to the farm with Laura and the littles to stay if you let me. Hell, if all of this Accords mess ever gets straightened out, you can come now if you want to. Tell Nat I said so. She'd bring you immediately." Clint grew more concerned when the tears finally spilled over and Wanda instinctively reached to hug him. "Hey, I was supposed to finally get to retire anyway. I think Laura and I can handle having one more kid at home. Yeah, yeah, I know, you're going to tell me you're not a kid. Too bad."
I don't care right now. Whatever still bothered her knowing Tony had created that thing, it paled in comparison to knowing Clint would have been willing to take her in, Avenger or not, if he'd known and she let him and Laura do so. I could help take care of Lila and Cooper and Nate, and Vis could come over and I could have my own little house eventually and...wait. Why am I thinking that? I don't even know if he likes me any more. And realistically fixing the Accords is never going to happen anyway.
_______________
Natasha had decided that slogging through and cataloguing that security footage was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. "Up to the morning on day 8," she muttered to herself later that night. Not even quite halfway. After a few minutes more, seeing Wanda literally thrown back into that cell and not moving, Sam trying to negotiate getting food to a barely conscious Wanda and then Scott giving his own to her since he was the only one the guards were inclined to allow out, she slapped the laptop closed. Then she immediately glanced over at Wanda, worried she might have woken her up by the noise, but Wanda remained sleeping. She appeared to be okay other than shivering a bit, her expression mostly peaceful regardless. She's here now, she's safe. This was weeks ago. No one is going to do anything like that to her anymore.
Nat impulsively pulled another extra blanket out and draped it over Wanda, who seemed cold so often since the rescue. She made sure Wanda's injured arm was still propped up with pillows before tucking a few loose strands of hair behind her ear. "It will not happen anymore," Natasha whispered. Never again.
"...Nat?" Wanda asked sleepily. There's something touching me. No, it's just Nat. I don't know what she's doing but she won't hurt me. “Осећаш се тужно." You feel sad. "Не буди тужан." Don't be sad.
Natasha knew Wanda probably was sensing her feelings instinctively because she was half asleep, but she did not care right now. She stayed next to Wanda until she was fully asleep again. There was no way she was going to talk to Wanda about that video footage anytime soon, and she was tempted to ask Laura to help go through it, but she didn't want to put Laura through that. Clint was decidedly not an option; he was already upset and snappish. That would not help. But trudging through it alone made her want to destroy something, and she had not even been there. No wonder Clint is acting like he does.
Nat paced the room silently until she felt her burner phone vibrate in her pocket. 'You coming back? I know you rescued your Avenger friends by now.'
'I can't. If I do, you become a fugitive too.'
'Well don't be caught, sestra. What was all that training for then?'
'One of them is badly hurt. I can't leave yet.'
'Bet it's the one you replaced me with. Bring her, I want to see my replacement'
'She's not a replacement. I have room enough for two baby sisters. Maybe once she's recovered. She would like you.'
'AHA KNEW IT WAS THAT ONE'
Then, before Natasha could type a reply to this clearly satisfied comment, another message came through. ’Why do you have to stay with her right now? That's not fair'
'Because if I leave her right now, she won't be safe. You are safe right now. I'm sorry. I'll come as soon as I can.'
'You better have a really good reason not to just bring her now. Nat hoarder. Another teammate can't watch her? I want to see you, F the accords'
'I'll figure something out. She's the only other girl on the team. I feel responsible for making sure she's taken care of.'
'Well, bring her the second you can travel then'
'Noted.' Nat had no intentions of bringing up trying to plan a visit to see Yelena yet; if she did tell Wanda about it, Wanda would inevitably feel guilty that they could not go anywhere right now, and then she'd probably be very upset and try to make Natasha go visit her sister alone regardless. There was no way she would leave Wanda alone until she could take care of herself again at least.
________________
On the fifth day in the vacation house, she finally asked Natasha if it was okay for them to go outside onto the balcony deck attached to the bedroom. The curtains were open, and the gray clouds outside seemed oddly inviting rather than gloomy to her. Being cooped up indoors seeing nothing but the bedroom and bathroom for days didn't bother Wanda, especially since the house was so homey and pleasant, all the more so after three weeks stuck in the Raft; but she suddenly really, really wanted to go outdoors, even if it was just to sit out there instead of inside. She knew she wasn't strong enough to do much more than that yet.
"Of course." Nat sounded like she had been waiting for Wanda to ask that.
"I...I think I'd like to go outside now. Please." Wanda did not feel back to normal by any stretch of the imagination, but she did feel improved than just a few days prior. The few steps just to go out onto the deck should be fine, she hoped, as long as she had help. She hesitantly slid her feet to the floor, her eyes glued to the sore ankle wrapped in a brace. What if it won't hold me? It doesn't matter, I'm not alone anymore.
"You want to try walking to the deck yourself." Natasha quickly looped Wanda's good arm over her own shoulders and pulled her gently to her feet. "Don't overthink it. I will not let you fall, I promise."
Wanda thought this was ridiculous; a month ago she was running around fighting in that airport and now she needed help to simply walk a few feet outside. "I hate needing help," she muttered.
"I know you do, but you are already so much better. You'll be fine. Give yourself some more time." They slowly made their way outside, Wanda leaning heavily on her friend for support, partially because she didn't trust her injured ankle one bit and partially because she still felt unbalanced and shaky, her legs weak after not standing or walking for so long. The balcony deck was long, appearing to be the entire length of the upper floor of the house, overlooking a fairly steep hill dropoff below to some trees, with more woods and larger mountains in the distance. Wanda thought the view was lovely. "Thank you for bringing me out here," she said quietly. Even the air was pleasant; it was quite warm, but there was a nice breeze, and it smelled like rain. Wanda closed her eyes, enjoying the breeze and just...being outdoors for a bit. I like it here. I wish things could stay calm like this forever.
"I'm just glad you're feeling strong enough to do so," Natasha replied immediately. It concerned her somewhat that Wanda hadn't immediately rejected help or insisted on walking outside on her own, because if she didn't do that, she probably still felt worse than she appeared to. But it was a major relief that her younger teammate had finally initiated an effort and request to go do something, even if it was something as small as simply going outside. So far, Wanda had not asked for anything, not food, water, clothes, blankets, books, movies, or anything else. She would accept things when offered them, and answer questions regarding a preference between things if asked directly, but she didn't ask for anything herself.
It had not been noticeable at first, but Wanda's request to go outside cemented it. Nat did not like that Wanda seemed hesitant to actually ask for something. "You do know you can ask for whatever you want. No one minds."
Wanda opened her eyes and glanced at Natasha in confusion. "I know. I don't want to be..." she searched for the correct words, "...burden? I'm not...scared to ask." Yes, I am. I asked Laura what Tony told her, but that was it. I am being ridiculous.
"I didn't say you were. Is there something you should talk about, maybe?" Natasha asked carefully, thinking that Wanda probably did indeed feel scared to ask for things, even if she logically knew she didn't need to be.
She knows. Why did I say that? Wanda didn't answer right away, but she pulled herself away and held onto the balcony railing instead, leaning on that. Natasha reluctantly let her go, but stayed within arm's reach anyway, just in case. "I know I'm safe here," she murmured finally.
"But...?" Nat prompted.
But I'm still scared. I don't want to care about what happened in that prison, but I do anyway. I'm constantly reminding myself I'm okay, I'm not there. And then I have to think it again and again, because I might be imagining things, because being here feels too nice to be real. “I can't explain," Wanda said finally. "It does not make sense."
...what if I have just convinced myself all of this is real and I'm still stuck there in that prison and no one came for me at all? It's possible. I can make other people believe things are real. What if I can do that to myself? Tiny red wisps floated around Wanda's good hand clenching the railing. She instantly pulled her hand away, stumbling backwards, and she would have fallen if Natasha hadn't caught her. "I hate my head. I don't...want it anymore." I didn't want it before and I don't want it now, either. “I am safe, and it...still thinks I am not. I might have imagined all of this. That I'm here at all." I pretended Pietro was here with me. Maybe I imagine Nat too.
"Wanda, look at me. Real. All real. I promise." Natasha quickly gave the younger girl a hug, hoping it would help to have something tangible and solid holding her. "Look at the clouds. We can smell the trees. Feel the splinters on the railing. Hear birds. You certainly haven't poked in my head, I would know. And I am sure I'm seeing and hearing the same things you are right now. If you imagined all of this and everything that happened since the escape, including me talking to you now, well, that's a damn detailed, realistic, long dream and I'm impressed."
Wanda found herself trying to hold back a laugh hearing that. Put that way, it really did sound ridiculous. "Thank you. I'm sorry." She let herself be led over to one of the reclining deck chairs and sat down. I felt anxious and whatever else before, too, just not as...badly. She knew quite well that, for her, this was not only from the whole Raft experience; that just exacerbated problems that were already present. But she would take this any day over how she had felt immediately after losing Pietro. Even little Lila appeared to recognize that she was more okay now than back then, and Wanda suspected Lila was less bothered by seeing her injured than she might have been otherwise because she was used to seeing her dad and 'Auntie Nat' appearing at her home injured.
Wanda thought she would also take being left in that disturbing sensory deprived solitary thing until she went crazy and lost her senses entirely if it meant she could bring her twin back.
"And asking for things is not being burdensome, either. You know this."
They might get tired of me, they might send me back, they might turn me in if I'm too much of a problem. "не неће. Не буди глуп," Wanda ordered herself, and then realized she had spoken out loud and instinctively tensed. No, they won't. Do not be stupid. "...I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"
"знаш да те разумем," Natasha interrupted her. You know I understand you. She was not at all surprised hearing Wanda lapse into her native Sokovian when talking to herself; the girl had done that many times before. However, Nat was also the only one on the team able to understand and speak it besides Vision, who seemed to have instantly learned or "downloaded" the language upon realizing it was Wanda's. "Who is 'they', and what are you trying to convince yourself that 'they' won't do?"
Wanda was not at all keen on answering this, because again, she thought it was illogical and ridiculous. Of course they were not going to send her away anywhere or turn her in, not after going to all the trouble of rescuing her and trying to help her heal. That did not make any sense. Nat won't drop that. She will keep asking and asking until I tell her, because she's trying to help. “All of...you. Send me away."
Natasha studied Wanda closely. She had her arms wrapped around her middle again, the exact same way she had been restrained for weeks. "No one is going to send you anywhere. You are safe here. Or, I suppose, as safe as we can make it."
I know. Wanda nodded and didn't say anything else. She did know that, but those other thoughts were still there poking at her all the same. At least she did not feel like she was on the verge of breaking down at the moment. The breeze was nice, Natasha was sitting next to her but letting her have a bit of space, and she could hear-sense, really-Cooper and Lila playing outside on the other side of the house. Maybe I could try doing something on purpose with my powers again. Maybe it would help prevent any more...accidental incidents, even if they are just harmless ones. It still didn't want to do anything intentionally; every time she did that, it felt like she was forcing it and painfully tearing bits of herself away inside. Yet these unintentional accidents like crushing the glass, sensing the intruding raccoons, and the scarlet wisps she had just made a few minutes ago didn't hurt at all. The floating plushies and Lila incident didn't seem like she should count that, since she'd been on pain medication when that happened.
At this point, she had concluded there was nothing wrong with her magic at all, and it was some kind of weird mental block instead.
"I would like to...do something," Wanda ventured after a minute or two more of silence, purposely yanking a few more wisps of magic free so that her hand was hazed in scarlet again. Maybe if I just force it enough times, it will go back to normal. "Practice like...back at the Compound."
Natasha gave her a concerned look. It was good that Wanda was requesting something else, but that was way too much way too fast. "You needed help just to walk from the bedroom out here, and then you nearly fell when I let go of you. What is it you wanted to do exactly?"
"Fix...this. I..." Wanda considered how she could explain herself. "I'm not sure it's...my power that isn't...working right. I think it is...me. My mind." And that makes no sense either. I can move things with my mind, so yes, the magic itself isn't working right.
"I'm not sure I understand. If you feel like your mind isn't letting you access your power normally, that is your magic, isn't it?"
Wanda did not trust herself to explain the problem verbally, so she switched back to signing again. S-T-A-R-T-E-D F-E-E-L-I-N-G W-R-O-N-G A-F-T-E-R A-R-M H-U-R-T. "I think..." she hesitated, thinking her current theory sounded odd and didn't make sense, "...it was trying to..." P-R-O-T-E-C-T M-E. Like it's smashed into an anxious, flattened, broken thing, even though I can still feel it there.
Nat considered this information. We really don't know enough about how Wanda's abilities work at all. She doesn't know, I certainly don't, and Clint doesn't either. Though, he might have some idea since he was there with her. "Protect you from being hurt further?" she asked cautiously, unsure how much Wanda wanted to share, or even knew. She certainly couldn't remember every detail of what had happened on the Raft anyway, not when they'd been drugging her with who knew what on top of the repeated shocks, lack of sleep, and everything else. Natasha knew Wanda had not shared anywhere near everything that had happened to her that she did remember, either. Going through more of that security footage herself over the last few days said that much, and those videos didn't even contain the worst of it. Nat kept seeing her removed from the cell and then more often than not, thrown back into it unconscious and always in worse condition than she had left it. While she did not have any footage from wherever the interrogation room was, it was more than obvious what was going on. Whatever had happened to her during and immediately after the failed escape attempt had clearly affected Wanda the most, and Nat wished she knew exactly what it was so that she could try to help Wanda better now.
Wanda nodded slowly. I thought it was just because I couldn't focus properly the more time that passed, but I'm alert now, and it still isn't working right. “Not that it helped any, but...I think so."
"Maybe if it started acting strangely after your arm was injured, it will heal too when your arm feels better," Natasha suggested. That was from the escape attempt, but I don't believe for a second that's what really disturbed her back then. No way.
I don't care, I want it to work now. I can't have it messed up for some indeterminate amount of time until that heals. Wanda still felt deeply uneasy about the damage her magic could-and had-caused previously, but she hated it being there and not behaving normally, not knowing if it might unintentionally make some harmful mistake much worse than crushing a glass in her fist or sensing some animals in the garage. Besides, she still didn't know exactly what was wrong her arm in the first place; she had no memories of anyone taking care of it on the quinjet at all, and she hadn't asked Natasha, either. She had just woken up with it already treated and put in the splint. "I think...that I need it to...function properly long before...that," she said slowly. I don't want us to have to leave here without that.
Though Wanda was disillusioned with herself for messing up, for hurting those poor people in Lagos, for failing to free herself and the others from the Raft, and numerous other things...she also was quite certain that the same power she didn't even really want was something the entire group of fugitives could use as a sort of failsafe. I will not use any mind tricks on innocents, but I would wreck Ross if I absolutely had to. "If we...leave here...I need it."
The two of them looked up after hearing a door slam to see Clint walking over. "Hey. Nice to see you outside," he said immediately. "What is it we need once leaving here?"
"My power working correctly," Wanda muttered, clearly frustrated.
"She wants to practice like we used to at the Compound...says her magic started feeling wrong after her arm was injured, that it was trying to protect her in some way from being hurt further by hiding away inside somehow," Natasha told him. "You want to explain instead?"
Wanda shook her head and didn't say anything. Clint looked so hopeful and happy that she was feeling strong enough to venture outside, and if she also explained that she suspected her own anxiety and whatever else was wrong with her head was messing up her use of those abilities, he would be upset yet again. Except, now Nat was telling him anyway, because she had said she didn't want to explain herself, and she gave Natasha a displeased look. Wanda did notice that her friend didn't use broken or mess to describe the issues at all.
"...so, obviously we don't have any way to know, but maybe her power is acting up because of her mental state rather than because she's physically injured." Natasha could see Wanda tense, but she didn't react beyond that.
"I want to practice," Wanda whispered, her expression determined. My powers not hurting me when I'm taking that medicine I don't like does not count. I don't care what the reasoning is, if it's that I'm mentally sick, then fine, I still need to make it work anyway, because those problems do not completely go away. They just...improve. "This did not happen," she switched to signing, W-H-E-N I L-O-S-T P-I-E-T-R-O.
Clint appeared more upset than he had before. "She's right. I think..." he paused, remembering the weeks right after Ultron, "I think that Wanda actually is in a better state of mind now, than then. She's talking to us, she's explaining herself, and, well...she's letting us see somewhat that she isn't okay, even if she isn't letting us know everything. After the first couple days, you appeared fine for about a week back then and then you just...crashed," Clint directed the final bit to Wanda.
"Nearly literally, off the roof," Wanda deadpanned, a bit amused at her own morbid joke comment.
Two disapproving faces glared at her, but then Natasha shook her head and smiled a little. "I can't even scold you for using dark humor like that. I just can't," she said quietly, knowing quite well that she might make similarly inappropriate morbid comments like that in the younger Avenger's place too.
Clint had no wish to picture potentially losing Wanda, especially like that. "Forget the terrible jokes. Point being, maybe your magic really does just need some time to recover. We already knew that it gets loused up from electricity. It probably was trying to protect you, from receiving more shocks and harming it further. Since that happening repeatedly every single day really did scare you and made you anxious all the time...maybe now it seems to you like those negative emotions are what's causing it, rather than your abilities just needing to heal themselves?"
That...makes sense. Wanda thought this sounded reasonable, but she still needed to start with something small and help it along, then, and she did not believe for a second that was the only reason it wasn't working right. I've been tased or otherwise hurt with electricity on missions before. That takes me out temporarily for a bit, not for days with no fix in sight, and it never made my magic hurt me. It just ruins concentration and makes it impossible to focus. “Practice, still," she insisted.
Clint frowned, not liking the idea at all, but maybe practicing would help her feel less anxious and therefore also decrease any likelihood that the "blocked" power was because of that. "I'm not shooting arrows at you right now, Wanda. Not even the rubber-tipped ones."
Now Wanda's eyes brightened. This sounded promising; he was willing to at least participate in this idea.
Natasha glanced from one Avenger friend to the other, a new idea taking shape. "Does Cooper have any of his Nerf guns here, perhaps?"
"He doesn't, but there is a whole slew of them down in the rec room. I'm not letting him and Lila shoot those at her, either, not yet." Clint glanced at Wanda, who seemed to just be listening intently.
"They're only dangerous if they don't protect their eyes. So long as they do, they'll all be fine anyway," Nat pointed out. "Let Wanda sit off to the side and intercept the darts. She won't be in any danger of being hit even if she misses, and Lila and Cooper would enjoy it. Stick with baby practice for a bit, and if it goes well, she can move on and do the same with you shooting real arrows."
"I like this idea." Wanda did not think this sounded very training-like, but it definitely sounded fun. This also eliminated the logistics problem that she couldn't stand or walk much yet without help, making any normal sparring practice virtually impossible for now. Her fingers twitched with excitement, and for once she actually felt a teeny, tiny bit of the sad ball of magic inside loosen happily. It did not take much to summon it to her hand, and this time it did not feel like she was tearing something painfully that shouldn't come out. This time it only ached, as if she had trained too hard one day and then immediately turned around to repeat the same difficult routine the next morning. That I can live with.
Not wanting to disappoint her, or make her believe no one wanted her to practice again, Clint nodded and patted Wanda's shoulder. "Then we can do that. I'll stay out here with you if Nat will go collect Coop and Lila and the Nerf gear."
________________
"You're sure you want to do this already?" Clint asked once Natasha was gone.
Wanda nodded. I think it will help...I feel so useless right now. “I need to...actively try to fix this," she explained. I don't want to just lie around and hope those powers recover back to normal. “I don't...I'm not..." Wanda wasn't sure how to explain herself further; she closed her eyes, searching for words. "I'm not stupid. I know, um..." she finally just glanced at Clint shyly and gestured at her splinted arm. "I don't know what...is wrong with it, exactly. But..." Tired of talking, Wanda switched back to signing that she wanted to make sure her magic would function properly regardless of whether her arm healed quickly or not.
"It still hurts bad, doesn't it." Clint sounded grumpy and concerned again, and not at all like that was a question.
"...Yeah." Feels much better than it did on the Raft, though. Wanda did not think it would do any good to lie to her friend about that. "I...can't fix that. I can fix the magic." I hope. She experimentally moved her fingers and then tried to close her bad hand into a fist, which definitely made the injured arm hurt even more, but at least she knew she could, in fact, move her hand properly, more or less. "I'm sorry I...transmitted pain before. I swear I never meant to...d-do that."
"Don't you dare be sorry for that," Clint ordered, voice more snappish than before. Then he felt worse because his tone made Wanda flinch, and he started pacing again. "I'm sorry."
Wanda watched him for a few seconds and then just said quietly, "Don't you be sorry."
"I did fetch you from the Compound. If I hadn't, you would never have been in that airport to start with," Clint pointed out, ceasing the pacing and returning to sit next to her. "No airport battle, no Raft."
"Still my choice." I could have said no. I could have stayed on fancy house arrest with Vision not letting me leave. Wanda stared out at the landscape and signed, D-I-D-N-T R-U-N L-I-K-E I W-A-S T-O-L-D. She glanced at Hawkeye after a moment's more of silence. "I have regrets. But not for that. And..." Wanda hesitated again, closing her eyes, thinking that the other feeling she had was ridiculous and a bit rude. "I think that..." Y-O-U N-E-E-D-E-D M-E. "In the...airport."
Much to her surprise, Clint actually laughed. "Yeah. That's very true. It's...nice to hear you say that. You did a great job playing support, and you helped Steve and Bucky escape lifting that tower."
Wanda gingerly leaned back in her deck chair, tired of sitting up on her own by now, using her good hand to support her injured arm as usual. It probably is a bit soon to attempt any kind of practice, but I hate lying around doing nothing. “I did one thing right."
"...Are you absolutely certain you're up to this practicing idea already?"
Wanda wondered what she had done to make Clint suspicious she was pushing herself too much. "I'm fine." I'm outside, I have a friend sitting with me, and I might still feel awful, but it's...better. I'm not all dizzy and nauseous anymore, either.
"Kid, you still can barely move without wincing, and you look tired just from walking outside for a few minutes to sit. You say 'I'm fine' regardless of whether you are or not. I want you to practice, but not if it's going to make things worse." Clint paused before adding, "Look, I'm just worried you're going to hurt yourself further. Not taking you to a hospital is bad enough already. We don't need you injuring yourself more by overdoing things."
"You can't risk...taking me to one, thank goodness." Wanda didn't even like being in the medbay back at the compound, let alone any hospitals. Too many wires and tubes and whatever else poking her that reminded her of being back with Hydra. I'm glad we can't take me to one. I'm fine.
"I know, but I don't like it. Nat and I aren't doctors. We have experience dealing with serious emergencies, sure, but more to just keep a person stable until we get to a professional. And we don't leave things like your arm untreated for two weeks." Clint sighed and went back to pacing.
"I trust you and Nat," she whispered. "I'm okay." I don't trust very many people, but them, I do. At least when I'm...thinking clearly.
"That's nice you trust us. I'm still concerned that arm isn't going to heal correctly because we didn't do a good enough job."
Wanda looked down at her arm and then back at Clint. I should just...ask. I keep avoiding asking. "Is it that bad?" I just thought it still hurt so much now, because nobody did anything for it for so long.
Clint gave her a puzzled look, wondering why Natasha hadn't told her, or if not, why Wanda herself hadn't asked. "You had a dislocated elbow and a greenstick fracture according to the portable scanner back on the quinjet, the latter of which is very odd since normally kids get those. That just means a bone cracked rather than completely broke."
"Admitting I'm not a kid?" Wanda's expression seemed amused and more relaxed now, and she wondered why she hadn't just asked Nat much earlier. That didn't sound so bad. Maybe it doesn't really hurt that much and it just feels like it does to me? Because I am still so tired all the time? I don't know.
"Small kids. Normally small children like Lila or Nate would get that type of fracture. Even Coop is getting a bit old. I have no idea how you ended up with one. Maybe your magic helped you a little or something. I don't know." Clint was mostly just glad there hadn't been any other more complicated damage, because otherwise he and Nat wouldn't have been able to put her elbow back in place. "Remember that time you went on a mission with Nat and you were shot?"
"Which time?"
Clint's disapproving gaze made Wanda look a bit sorry; she knew he thought she took too many risks with her own safety on missions, because she simply didn't care all that much so long as she performed the mission successfully. "The first time. You two were clearing out that small leftover Hydra building, the roof started collapsing, and you were holding it up while Nat took out the threats. I seem to remember it was supposed to be an easy mission, but there were more men there than the intel said. You could have died; you freaked Nat out. She called the farm and told me all about it."
"...Oh." Wanda remembered this clearly; she'd used herself as a shield to protect Natasha at one point, thinking that she could still do her own role even if hit as long as she was prepared for it. Now, she knew quite well she could have shifted her control over the small collapsing portion of the roof to one hand and shielded Nat and herself with the other instead, rather than intentionally taking a bullet. Back then she hadn't trusted herself to do that; it had been only the second mission she'd been on and she was eager to prove herself and really didn't want to risk making any power mistakes. And now I have messed up anyway.
She could remember losing control of the roof for a split second before grabbing it again, enough that it hit the taller men's heads, knocking them out...and then Nat grabbed her and carried her outside. Wanda's memories were a bit fuzzy past that, but she did remember there was blood everywhere and that she'd had the weird thought that it was good she was already wearing red because it wouldn't show as much. Always-calm Natasha looked extremely worried, Wanda had pulled the bullet out herself with her magic, and put her hand over the wound, thinking she could hold it together with her own telekinesis until Natasha had gotten her back to safety. At some point she'd passed out and woken up in the medbay back at the Compound (which she hated), with multiple puzzled, relieved faces all staring at her.
There was a nice scar on her side from the incident, but nothing else, and it had healed quickly enough that it baffled everyone, including her. Wanda knew she hadn't literally healed herself, since it still took a couple weeks or so, and she had actively tried to do so since on other occasions and failed entirely, so she had concluded that no, her powers did not, in fact, allow her to do that. But clearly her magic had done something back then to keep her alive. Maybe Clint was right, and this was some tiny, tiny thing it had done now to help protect her.
"Yeah, oh. Point being, that incident could have been even worse, and you healed quicker than you should have, too. Maybe your abilities don't heal things, exactly, but they definitely helped you back then, and now...well, I'm glad that fracture isn't any worse than it is, but you should not have it. Your magic is the only logical explanation."
Well, I wish it would have just fixed it entirely if it is going to do weird things I'm not even conscious of. "I wish it would make it...s-stop hurting, then," Wanda said. Also, how would that even be possible? I don't understand.
"...Maybe you should just lie down again and entertain Lila floating those stuffed animals of hers around the room." Clint sounded all concerned again. If Wanda admitted out loud that she was hurting, that meant it must be really bad, because she wasn't claiming she was fine.
"Let me try this. Please," Wanda replied softly. If I fail or I make myself faint again, then fine, but I want to get back to...regular me. I hate this, I want to forget about all of it.
Notes:
Wanda is slowly recovering from the Raft ordeal, she's starting to feel stronger and she's wanting to Actively Do Things now where before she was just laying about getting some much-needed rest. Kinda wanted to, again, poke at what her magic is able to do in the future to heal her; she can't do anything like that right now or in the past obviously, but under dire circumstances it might do some tiny thing to help protect her. (she's basically using another probability hex unconsciously here during the past mission incident where she purposely took a bullet to protect Nat, and now with her fractured arm, but obviously she doesn't have any name for/knowledge of that and neither do her teammates. )
Next chapter coming soon! Any comments and such are much appreciated, I love reading them:)
Vision will show up next chapter, FINALLY. I am really excited to have him show up xD
Chapter 9: Chapter 9
Summary:
In which Wanda makes a very small breakthrough with her magic, Clint comforts her through a panic attack, she is able to go outside again for a bit and confides something that’s been bothering her to Nat...and Vision finally shows up.
Notes:
she is cautiously happy that Vision shows up lol. The two of them are so sweet and I was excited to make him appear in this fic xD I'm usually not into ships much but c'mon let's let the two powerful cinnamon rolls be happy together please and thank you! I say this and then put poor Wanda through the wringer but hey, I am giving her an actual support system to help deal with things, thank you very much. Lol.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Natasha returned to find her teammates simply sitting and staring out at the landscape again. "Laura's feeding Nate, and Cooper and Lila are waiting for us in that big rec room."
Wanda didn't bother protesting at being carried downstairs, since she really did want to save her very limited energy for practicing, even if it was more just playing with Lila and Cooper than anything else. The children looked so excited when the three Avengers came in that she instantly felt a bit excited herself. Practice or not, having Cooper and Lila around made her feel like a big sister, which was different but in a good way. Wanda was quite used to being the younger one; goodness knew Pietro never let her forget he was twelve minutes older. He could be so annoying, too! I don't care, I wish he would come back and annoy me again. I miss him.
"We want to have teams!" Cooper announced, quite pleased with himself. "Dad, you and me against Lila and Auntie Nat. We decided we want to play to ten points and each hit is a point."
"And if Wanda catches a dart then she gets a point," Lila added.
"Remember what I told you, kids: do not aim at her, not today," Natasha said firmly. "She's sitting on the sidelines and playing from there. This is not the monkey-in-the-middle version you two played last time I visited."
Wanda thought it would be fine if they did. Getting hit by a silly Nerf dart wasn't going to harm her, but she kept this to herself. Mostly she was just happy to be somewhere else and actively engaging in some kind of activity, even if she was just chilling in the soft chair her friends had set up on the side for her. This huge rectangular rec room seemed fancy; the floor was thickly carpeted except for some shiny ivory tiles on one end leading to a pair of tall mahogany double doors. There was also a pool table on the other end of the room, a large selection of Nerf weapons all hung up on a wall, and a pile of pool toys all over by those big double doors. "...Pool outside?" she asked now.
"Yeah, it even has a slide," Cooper said happily. "Not a huge one, but still!"
Wanda was not a particularly good swimmer, not having had a chance to learn when she was little, and obviously Hydra had not been concerned with teaching her and Pietro such a thing, so she had never learned until last year at the Compound, where there was a huge pool. She liked being in the water now, even if swimming was not a strong skill of hers. If there was a pool here at the safe house, she wanted to go in it. Maybe it would help her relax a little.
"Do you want to go out to the pool instead of doing this?" Nat asked, thinking that Wanda was not going to have enough energy to do both today; she already looked tired, though it was also obvious she was happy to be somewhere else besides the same cozy bedroom she had been resting in the past few days, and to be doing something.
Wanda shook her head. "Maybe tomorrow, please."
"Okay."
The Nerf mini battle commenced, and soon everyone was laughing. Wanda couldn't help just watching the others for a few minutes. Simply seeing them happy made her feel a little better. Another microscopic bit of power floated free from its mental prison, and Wanda finally looked down at her hand, drawing the little bits into a scarlet haze around her fingers. Like upstairs, it only felt a little achy-tired, not painfully ripped free like before. There is nothing wrong with it. I think I just have to wait. Though she didn't truly have any proof of that, her gut told her that her magic was not broken at all. Maybe she had torn it up and locked it down subconsciously, but practicing here with friends wasn't going to 'make it stronger'...practicing with friends would help because it made her feel better, to help those drowning broken pieces of her inside.
The scarlet haze seemed to respond to this realization and the tired achy feeling dissipated. Wanda knew if she yanked any more power than that tiny bit free at once, it would hurt again, but this little bit no longer did.
"She isn't doing anything, Auntie Nat," Lila was saying now, yanking Wanda out of her reverie. "I thought she was going to play too. Is Wanda's magic still sick?"
Natasha glanced at Wanda and could easily tell there was nothing to be concerned about. If Wanda wanted to sit there and twirl wisps of her power in her hand while thinking, then fine. At least she seemed content, and she was consciously controlling those scarlet wisps, too. "Let her be. Yes, her magic is 'sick'. That's why we're only doing this for practicing right now."
"I'm just thinking...sorry." I'll do what I was supposed to be doing.
Lila didn't look entirely convinced, but she came over to give Wanda a hug. Then she started laughing when she heard her father jokingly saying "no fair!" A single foam dart held in Wanda's magic floated about six inches from a distracted Natasha, and Wanda herself looked rather pleased. "Daddyyyy! Why are you aiming at Auntie Nat while we're talking?" Lila protested.
"'Cause you two didn't call a time-out."
"I'm okay, Lila. Really," Wanda told the little girl, and let the dart drop into Lila's waiting hand. "Extra point, yes?"
"That's no fair!" Cooper called, "you can't just give points away!"
"She just did!" Lila shouted gleefully, waving the dart in the air. "You wanted to play boys against girls before. She's a girl!"
Cooper made a face and aimed at his little sister. Wanda easily caught this dart too, which made Lila dance around squealing that Cooper couldn't get her. Cooper continued his Nerf assault only on Lila, who continued squealing and shouting that she had a magic shield, so there. Clint and Natasha traded glances and then shrugged. The children were not angry anymore, anyway, and soon there were a good twenty or so foam darts littering the floor around Wanda.
"Game's over, kids," Clint announced, laughing himself now. It might have devolved into silliness quickly, but its purpose was successful: Wanda could use tiny bits of her power effectively, at least, even right now, and knowing that made a bit of her usual spark reappear. Once she had joined the game, she had not missed any of the darts that would have landed on their target, and only missed a few of the ones that went wide. Prioritizing which ones to catch and successfully doing so the first time was good. She did look exhausted, but she had been tired before they started anyway. "Do you want to play another round?"
Wanda shook her head, but she was looking down at her hand and smiling now. I did something. This was barely anything at all, but it worked correctly and I could think clearly enough in the moment to react properly. I'll be fine. She knew Clint had been right when he told her before they could not risk her overdoing things. Playing-practicing-more right now was not a good idea. Her magic felt pretty much the same as when they had started, but she had twisted her body too quickly and made her ribs hurt worse, and she wanted to put her injured arm on a pillow for a little while because it also hurt worse simply from resting awkwardly in her lap. "But I'm okay," she clarified quickly, because she didn't want them to think coming down here had hurt her.
"You're sure you're okay?"
"Very." The part that is near impossible to fix feels better. My stupid anxious head and the broken enhancements. Something about just being included in some simple group activity made Wanda feel more at peace. Forget the reason why, or that she had really just wanted to practice, or anything else; she was not lonely here. They had not left her behind in that prison even though it would be much, much easier to stay hidden without her. They had not even just rescued her from the Raft and abandoned her somewhere with some supplies to fend for herself. No, she was safe in a huge vacation house and for once she let herself truly feel content. Pietro would be happy here too. She would be happy for him since he was not here to enjoy it, as much as she wanted to pretend otherwise.
"Can we all go swimming?" Lila asked now.
"Wanda doesn't want to swim today, so no. You and Cooper may swim though if one of us is watching you, so go find your swimsuits and get a snack while you wait," Clint told her.
The children looked at each other, nodded, and then ran off eagerly.
"I don't mind...being alone for a bit," Wanda said. I just want to nap a little. I can do that by myself. Y-O-U C-A-N S-W-I-M T-H-E-N. She frowned at the silent conversation held in the traded glance between the two older Avengers. "I'm fine."
"You can pick whether you want Laura, Clint, or me to stay with you, but being alone isn't an option," Natasha said firmly. "We won't talk to you if you want quiet, but you can't be alone in the house while everyone else goes outside to the pool."
"I'm fine. I...I'm not...I want..." I don't know how to explain. Wanda did not want to inconvenience them by having to watch her, but she also inexplicably thought she wanted to be by herself for a little while. This felt illogical considering all that time on the Raft feeling horribly lonely and that a bit of her still worried the others would not want her around anymore in the first place.
"If you'd like some me time, then we can come check on you every few minutes instead, but we're not leaving you alone in the house entirely. Would that be better?"
Wanda blinked, staring at Nat. She immediately nodded, surprised that Natasha knew what she wanted even though she hadn't explained. However, she still didn't answer right away when asked to pick one of them. Natasha had spent so much time with her over the past few days, Clint should get to spend time with his children, and Laura didn't need to get roped into repeatedly checking on an injured Avenger. Finally, she pointed at Clint, thinking that at the very least, Nat would get a break from staying with her nearly the entire time since the rescue. Taking care of her must be exhausting.
________________
Once she was back upstairs in the bedroom, Wanda immediately thought she would fall back asleep again.
"I'll be back in about five minutes or so," Clint assured her.
Wanda thought that he did not need to literally check on her every five minutes, but she didn't argue. Knowing he would do so meant she didn't have to be nervous about being alone, anyway. Then she thought that was stupid; she wanted to be alone for a little while, so why was the idea of being alone also making her stomach churn? I told them I'd be fine. What is wrong with me? I was happy just a few minutes ago. “Okay."
Clint saw something in Wanda's gaze that concerned him. She was staring at the wall, her green eyes unfocused, as if she were somewhere else entirely. The contentment that had been wafting from her in waves downstairs had vanished. "You're absolutely sure you want me to leave and come back?" he questioned.
"Yes." If she continued letting herself rely on one of them not to get scared or lost in her own head, that would be bad. They were not going to be watching over her forever. She was fine while Clint set the TV remote on the nightstand. She was fine while he put a few books within reach. She was fine while he said again that he would be back soon. The problem was when he turned off the light on his way out. Almost immediately she was somewhere else, back in that pitch-black room alone on that freezing table with rough straps holding her down. She needed to turn that light on.
Curtains. It was not even particularly dark in here; it was daytime outside, just cloudy. Open the curtains. That would help. She should open the curtains immediately. In a second she was out of bed, standing on shaky legs and ignoring the increased pain moving quickly caused.
Waiting right outside the room because he still thought leaving Wanda alone was a bad idea, Clint heard a thump and then a stifled pained yelp. It was the exact same noise he had heard Wanda make so many times on the Raft. I knew this was a bad idea. Without waiting any longer, he reentered the bedroom to find her crumpled on the floor a couple steps from the bed. "What the hell? What's wrong, what are you trying to do?" he demanded.
Wanda only registered angry voice, and she instinctively scooted backwards, giving the voice the same scathing look of defense that she had done countless times before. Except, now she had one hand free, even if she still couldn't move the other one, and she held the free one up threateningly, scarlet crackling around her fingers. Get away from me. I don't know what happened, I don't know why my arm is free, but-
I'm using my magic. I didn't get shocked for it. I messed up before, my escape failed, I couldn't get out, why is it off again now?
"Hey, I'm sorry I spoke harshly. You know me, Wanda, remember? It's okay, you're safe now." Clint wondered how many times a crying, terrified Wanda had pulled out that angry scathing glance as a defense mechanism on the Raft. Seeing it directed at him now didn't disturb him in the least; he just wanted to give Wanda a much-deserved hug, help her calm down, and make her understand nobody was going to hurt her any further.
It still hurts. Why does it still hurt if I am safe? Wanda felt a gentle hand on her own and wanted to yank herself away again, but some instinct prevented her from doing so. The hand guided her shaky one to her neck, putting a feather-light touch there. It made her flinch in pain, but she could tell that horrendous torture device wasn't locked around her neck anymore, at least. I'm not there. Not there. I just... Wanda closed her eyes, still feeling tense and panicky.
"See, nothing there. You're okay. We're in New York, in the vacation house." Clint still wasn't sure what had set Wanda off, but obviously something had sent her spiraling into some sort of flashback or panic attack. She was stiff as a board and shaking, breathing quickly, though at least she wasn't pulling away now.
”I can't move...my arm. It still hurts. If...safe...why does it...still hurt...so bad?"
Clint was startled to receive the telepathic message, because Wanda had not done that since days before the rescue. Clearly she didn't believe yet that they were, in fact, safe, and thought that someone would punish her again for speaking out loud. She's still in emergency mode. Clint gently pulled her closer. "Because it's broken, kid. Look. You can move your hand. Arm too. You just can't bend that elbow or wrist right now. You're not restrained in that jacket again or strapped to a chair or whatever else. There's a splint on it. It just hurts because it's not healed yet."
Wanda felt her good hand touching the hurt one, and relaxed a tiny bit, though she kept her eyes squeezed shut. "I'm sorry I...can't talk. I know...not an emergency...now. I can stop."
"No, that's fine. You can keep emergency-messaging as long as you need to." It was not fine, Clint thought sourly, and he wondered how many episodes like this over the past few days Natasha hadn't told him about. "Do you know what's happening now?"
Wanda nodded a tiny bit, her face buried in her friend's shoulder. I am in a safe place, and Clint is helping me to calm down. I am fine.
"Okay, good." Clint was very relieved she seemed to be a little better now, though she was still shaking. "Are you cold?" There was another tiny nod, so he quickly leaned her against the side of the bed, saying he was just going to grab a blanket.
Wanda finally opened her eyes when she felt something soft and fluffy wrapped around her shoulders. She didn't speak yet, but she did sign 'thank you'. This was exactly why she still worried sometimes the others would not want her around any longer. How could she be useful if her mind kept betraying her like that? What if this happened on a mission again? There was nothing to fear here, no bomb she couldn't contain, no Raft, no Hydra, no Ultron...and no Pietro either. I want him back. I miss him. I'd rather be scared forever than Pietro be dead. That hole in her heart where Pietro should be was never going to go away.
"Do you know what triggered this?" Clint was asking now. "If we know, maybe we can prevent it from happening again by either avoiding it or desensitizing you to it."
D-A-R-K. Wanda felt a warm arm around her shoulders, and she tensed briefly, but then relaxed. They are not going to send me away or not want me around anymore, she reminded herself, that is me being paranoid.
"Because I turned the light off? It's...not dark in here, kid." Clint was glad Wanda seemed to relax a little further as she began signing again. Her hand was still trembling, but her signed letters were clear and deliberate.
I K-N-O-W.
"You've been sleeping at night with all of the lights off, haven't you?"
A nod.
"But you had Nat in here with you, and once you had Lila too," Clint said quietly. "This is why we didn't want to leave you alone yet. What were you trying to do?"
Wanda debated with herself, wanting to answer aloud, but any words feeling trapped inside all the same. I don't need to be silent. I am fine. "C...cur...tains," she whispered.
Oh. “You wanted to open the curtains." Clint wondered why Wanda hadn't simply used her magic to flick them open if that had been all she wanted to do, especially after seeing her easily catch all of those Nerf darts earlier. "Were you anxious with the abrupt dimmer lighting while being alone, but tried to remedy that yourself by opening the curtains?"
Wanda nodded again, but didn't offer further explanation. Then I fell, and it hurt, and I thought I was back there again.
"That was a good idea, but I think you should have just used your magic to do it. I'm guessing you fell, and that scared you because it hurt. Did you injure yourself more doing that?"
Wanda nodded in agreement that yes, that was exactly what had happened, but then realized Clint would probably think she was saying yes to hurting herself falling, because that had been the actual question. "I'm okay," she blurted hurriedly, "I just...scared myself."
Clint pulled away, studying Wanda's face. Other than the tears streaking her cheeks, she seemed the same as before. "You didn't land on your arm or anything like that?"
"No." Mostly the fall had just really, really hurt her ribs; Wanda thought she was fine now, other than maybe an extra bruise or two, which wasn't a concern to her at this point. Heck, she had gotten plenty of those and worse while training, so who cared?
Clint studied the adjustable device splinting the young Avenger's injured arm anyway, but everything seemed to still be in place as it should be. Wanda was staring at it herself curiously now, and Clint was happy to see that expression on her face rather than the terrified one from a few minutes ago. "Right now this is functioning to completely immobilize it, but once your arm heals more, you can adjust the hinge lock so you can use your arm a bit, okay?"
Wanda was familiar with how the thing worked now that she was studying it; this was like an upgraded version of the ones that were always on an Avengers quinjet in case of emergencies during missions. You needed a different one for arms and legs obviously, but they were adjustable to fit pretty much anyone and easily protected an injured limb until they could get back to the Compound, and usually after that, too, even after someone like Helen double checked it. She'd had one before and it irked her a bit now that it was another Stark-created device on her, but that was dumb. Nat and Clint were literally just using our regular mission supplies to help me. I am being ridiculous.
"I think I'll get you some ice. I can either help you downstairs to get some, or I can open the curtains and you can stay here for a minute. You feel free to use your telepathic talking trick if you feel panicky again. Feeling like that counts as an emergency, do you understand?"
"...What?" That is not an emergency.
"I said that counts as an emergency. The condition I gave you was simply if you couldn't communicate another way. It counts. If that makes it easier to explain what set you off, that is fine. Would you like me to tell Nat too? She wouldn't mind if you did the same with her."
"No, it...scares her. I'd rather...respect that, please." Wanda knew quite well that one reason Clint didn't mind her bending the 'no mind tricks' rule with him was because he had not experienced her shoving his worst nightmares into his head. The others had, including Nat. Natasha trusted her, she was like a big sister to her, but that was not something Wanda wanted to put her friend through reliving again, even though it wasn't the same thing at all.
"She wouldn't tell you not to use your power to communicate with her when you're upset, Wanda," Clint said.
Wanda pulled herself back on the bed with only a little help, unsure how to answer that. Last year, Natasha had flat out told her right after arriving at the Avengers Compound that what she had done was unacceptable and made it difficult to trust that she would not do it again despite promising not to. And snapped "stay out of my head." Except then five minutes later, the older Avenger had also told her she was a friend, Wanda should not beat herself up for what she had done-just not do it again-and that if she needed anything or had questions, she should come ask. At the time, Wanda had been utterly baffled, but she'd quickly realized Natasha was disturbed by what she had done to her, but she understood, and wasn't going to hold it against her. "I know. But I won't...anyway."
"You don't want me to just talk to her about it?"
"No."
"Okay, I won't." Clint opened the curtains, revealing the cloudy sky outside. "I'm going to get the ice. I will be right back. You feel crappy again, you tell me, and keep talking until I get back, just like you did in that hellhole to stay calm. That's a helpful coping skill you have, and it's a healthy one, so use it."
Wanda watched her friend leave, and...it was fine. She felt mildly anxious being by herself, but simply looking outside at the sky was enough to calm her down. I'll dig in my duffel bag later. I'm tired.
Clint returned to find her asleep, curled up in a ball with her broken arm awkwardly flung over a pillow. But at least Wanda did not seem upset anymore. Rather than wake her up, he simply arranged the ice packs on her arm and ankle, figuring they could just get more for the ribs when she woke up.
Wanda shifted a bit and abruptly opened her eyes. There was something cold on her, but it also...felt nice? Oh. Clint was bringing ice upstairs. I'm fine. “Thank you," she mumbled, eyes drifting closed again.
"You tell me if you want anything else."
"...Okay."
___________________
The next afternoon, Wanda did go out to the pool with everyone else, though Nat made sure she knew she did not have to stay any longer than she felt up to staying. Wanda remained resting at the poolside in a chair, mostly just content to be outside watching Cooper and Lila play.
"Do you want to at least dip your feet in?" Natasha suggested. "It might help your ankle feel better, anyway."
"...Okay." Wanda swished her feet back and forth in the water a bit once Nat had helped her sit on the edge of the pool. This was nice and relaxing, and it did help her sore ankle feel better, just like Natasha said. She closed her eyes, enjoying the sun shining and the outdoor sounds. The pool deck cement was warm but not hot under her fingers. This is not going to last. It just can't. I should stop thinking about that and enjoy being here while I can. Everything always gets ruined when I am involved.
...I'm relaxing in some fancy vacation house and those people in Lagos are dead. What about their families? Wanda wished she could at least send the victims' families some kind of help package and an apology. It would not undo her mistake, but she wanted to tell them she was sorry and do something small to help them now. Certainly they would not want to see her, and that was fine, but she wanted the survivors to be safe. Especially those children. I don't even have anything I could send there. I have nothing except what's in that duffel bag. Sam had told her there was a little money in there for her, but objectively she knew Nat, Clint, and Laura would all tell her she couldn't simply send that to Lagos. It wasn't like she knew where those poor children lived either-they are probably on the street like me and Pietro were, she thought-and she didn't even know their names so she could ask Nat to find them.
Well, since stupid Ross had wanted to make the trash that was the Accords look good by sending Team Iron Man to Lagos to help, maybe there was at least one good thing: the heroes that signed had certainly helped people like those kids. This thought made her feel a little better; she still absolutely hated Ross with a fiery passion, but at least some good must have come from his behavior to further his own agenda. "Nat...?"
"Yeah?"
Wanda slowly signed to ask if Natasha had seen any pictures from Lagos that matched the description of the one she had seen with the two children next to the tarp-covered body. "I, um...if I could...know what happened to them?"
"Yes, I have seen that, actually. You want me to try to find out who they are and if they're safe now?" Natasha asked. "That photo wasn't circulating the internet yet before the airport-I suppose it might've been out there somewhere, but not on TV or any of the common news sites. Were you watching the news yesterday when you were chilling in the bedroom by yourself?" Nat sounded suspicious now.
"No, um...it was...shoved in my face...on the...Raft." I W-A-S S-T-U-P-I-D. I C-R-I-E-D. Wanda didn't even want to look at Nat now, because it was ridiculous and she hated that she had let that photo make her cry. Crying was not going to help those kids at all and she had reacted the way Ross had wanted her to besides. I shouldn't have told the truth. Is it selfish to want to know? If those children are safe now, I would feel better. I know I would.
"That is not stupid," Natasha said firmly.
"Reacted like I was...supposed to."
"Clearly not, because you still didn't tell Ross anything."
Wanda stared into the pool, watching the water ripple. "I didn't know anything anyway," she muttered finally. She did not think it was a big deal to not say anything when she didn't have the information in the first place.
"Yes, you did. You just didn't have confirmed information. And I know you wouldn't have broken and told him anything anyway. You're stubborn." Natasha was honestly surprised Wanda was talking about this when it was very clear seeing this particular picture was a very big deal to her, but it seemed like another good sign. "I'll see what I can do to find out about the kids in that photo."
Wanda didn't volunteer any further information, but she seemed to be a little more at ease hearing that. "Thank you."
__________________
Wanda was sitting downstairs in the big living room playing Go Fish with everyone else the next afternoon just after lunchtime when they all heard a light knock on the front door. Wanda's first thought was that it was someone coming to take her and the other rogue Avengers away, but then why was the knock so pleasant? Still, the idea of anyone knocking on the door freaked her out. Even if it was just a delivery person, if someone saw her... Wait. I sense something.
"I'll check," Laura said quickly. "Lila, Cooper, go upstairs, please."
"Don't answer it!" Clint hissed.
"If it is anyone suspicious, it's weird if we don't since it's obvious someone's here. Take Nate."
Natasha followed Laura to the door. "Any trouble, I'm here. I have the least to lose if caught. Clint has you and the children, and we can't risk Wanda being taken again." She had no intentions of letting anything happen, but just in case, she wasn't going to let the other two be caught.
"Nat, you're our family too. Don't-"
"I'm not handing myself over," Natasha interrupted, "I'm merely saying if I get captured, I don't have three little kids at home that need me, and I don't have Wanda's enhancements, either. I might get hurt, sure, but not like what happened to her." Both Yelena and Wanda would be horribly upset, but better that than getting one or both of those two stubborn younger girls into trouble. Truth be told, she knew the others would find her and get her back anyway, so she was not as concerned about the prospect as she might have been otherwise.
Laura didn't argue; she simply whispered to stay out of sight.
"I am here to fulfill a request for plumbing repair," Wanda heard a new voice say, and instantly her expression lit up. That is Vis, she thought happily, though what on earth he was talking about plumbing for, she had no clue. A cover for visiting? "I think it's Vision. I...I sense him."
Clint scowled now, not liking that turn of events at all. If it really was Vision, what was he doing here pretending to be a plumber? If it was innocuous, why not tell Laura the truth? Wanda was much stronger than she had been a few days ago, but she was still badly injured. If that robot did decide to turn them in, he and Natasha wouldn't be able to protect her. Placing Nate in his playpen, he padded out of the room, telling Wanda to please stay put.
Wanda did stay put, listening to the exchange as Laura made it clear they didn't need any plumbing fixed, and then Vision saying yes, he knew this, it was a cover, it was Vision from the Avengers in disguise and could he please see Wanda? He had brought some things for her and would like to visit her very much. He was not going to betray their location to anyone, period.
Laura glanced at Natasha, still hidden from sight behind the door. She nodded. Though this man appeared to be a normal human, not a bright purplish red synthezoid, the mannerisms and voice matched too well.
Also, one of the man's hands had phased right through the door. It was definitely Vision.
"You can come in, but you may not see her unless she wants to," Laura said firmly. "If she says no, you leave immediately, fake plumber or not."
Natasha appeared from behind the front door with a raised eyebrow. "Also, what kind of plumber wears a suit?"
"The heck, what are we letting him in for?!" Clint protested. "You should have flown off with that girl in the airport if you care so much about her."
"Yes, I should have."
"You left her behind. You had the power to get her out of there, you have no right to waltz in here now and ask to see her. Why should she want to see you now?"
"She should not, but I would like to hear it directly from her, please," Vision said politely.
”I can feel you," Wanda said mentally from a room very nearby. "You are not going to...take me back to that place, are you?"
”Of course not, though I would understand if you prefer me to leave."
”No! I just...I don't want to go back there. I'd rather die first."
”Never. I will never let you be taken to that prison again, Wanda. I promise."
"Don't you dare get in her head. You're not taking her away from here," Clint said snappishly.
"I will not talk to her telepathically any longer, then." Vision watched the archer for a few seconds, unsure what would convince him he had no plans to turn any of them in, let alone the dark-haired girl he cared for very, very much who was also connected to the mind stone. That prison had been torturing her for weeks; he had seen a bit of the security footage from the cells, and he knew there was much, much more that there was no video of, even if he had wanted to watch the rest of the footage, which he didn't. "I have only come to visit. If she does not wish to see me, then I will leave immediately."
"Suppose she does say no," Natasha said carefully, knowing Wanda would not do that, but needing to know.
"Then I would be...quite disappointed, but leave her safe here. I will not harass her."
”Please don't leave. I'm around the corner, in the living room," Wanda sent, not wanting to wait much longer. Maybe it was stupid, but all she wanted right now was launch herself into his arms and give him a hug. If he did want to hurt her, well...then she would do her best to kick him out with her powers. I don't think I can right now...certainly not easily or painlessly, but I won't go without a fight, at least. Vis is already here. I did not contact him and ask him to come. Wanda was still thinking when she saw him wander into the living room, her friends right behind. Clint still looked genuinely mad, but Laura and Nat were just watching him warily.
Vision looked quite different in his new human disguise, but she did not care; she instantly knew him, she could feel him, she could sense that mind stone and the strangely organized but deeply caring emotions that were only his. In a second, she had struggled to her feet and stumbled a few limping steps toward him, her good hand on the wall unsuccessfully trying to balance herself. The next thing she knew, he looked like his normal red synthezoid self again and had her in his arms. Wanda felt a gentle touch on the butterfly bandage protecting a cut on her forehead, another on her temple, and then the same touch across the slowly fading bruises and scrapes on the rest of her face. ”I'm okay, I promise." It was clear Vision was concerned and upset, and somehow that gentle reaction made her want to cry. He was not either going to hurt her, and he didn't not care anymore, either. She still had no idea why he hadn't done anything else sooner, but for now, this was enough. "I'm sorry I didn't...get ready. For you visiting. I look ugly," she blurted, and then thought this was a dumb thing to say, because she knew Vision didn't care what she looked like, or what she was wearing, or that there were "ugly" cuts and bruises all over her, or anything else of that nature. He just didn't like seeing her hurt.
"You are not ugly. The people that hurt you are ugly. Why would you think that?" Vision looked so confused, and then was more confused when Wanda simply smiled at him through her tears. He had expected to find her scared or angry or both, but instead she just seemed...sad. Even her smile seemed sad, as if she didn't quite believe what she was hearing, but then again, she gave him a sad smile a lot, even before all of this mess with the Accords had happened. And there was some deeply pained thing flickering in her green eyes that made his synthetic stomach clench in an unfamiliar, unpleasant way. He still did not understand humans fully, but he did know he wanted to protect complicated, chaotic Wanda, who tended to make a mess of things including herself a lot, and he had completely failed in this venture. This human was special; he was supposed to protect all humans, but then he had seen her hurt in the airport and messed up himself, hurting Rhodey.
Maybe messing up was inherent to being human. He had also left her alone there-she had sent him away, but he should have disobeyed this and stayed with her anyway-and bad humans were in charge of enforcing the Accords. Those same Accords he had signed. That should have been a good thing, but because the wrong people were in charge, someone he cared about deeply had been hurt in an irreversible way. "I am so sorry I did not take you out of the airport, and that you were harmed so much in that place. I never thought that would happen."
”I'm not angry with you anymore. I'll live, I'm okay." Wanda wasn't sure how much she wanted to share just yet. As happy as she was to see Vis, there was still this knot of fear inside that said she should keep the worst of her pain inside for now, emotional or otherwise, because if he knew, then he might break her somehow. She could not live broken into even more pieces inside. There were already too many, like small shattered things you would just sweep up and throw out because it wasn't worth wasting time trying to fix. That's not right either. None of them are going to do that. Even little Lila helps put those pieces together every time she sees me, and she doesn't even know everything that's wrong.
"Sit down," Clint said gruffly, still not trusting Vision by any means, but it was clear that Wanda did not want him to go away, and to be fair, Vision had not done anything to make them believe he meant ill by coming here.
"Very well. Thank you." Vision sat on the sofa with Wanda still held protectively in his arms, her good arm looped around his neck.
The three older adults all traded glances. If Vision wanted to simply sit there holding Wanda, that was harmless, but it didn't make any of them trust him more, either. Clint couldn't help being worried that the girl would fall asleep there and Vision would just carry her off out of the house, and they couldn't physically stop such a thing from happening.
"If it is acceptable, I should like to stay for an hour or two. The plumbing issue might have been serious. But if necessary, I can leave sooner."
"Can I talk to him alone?" Wanda asked quietly. Please. I have questions I need answered.
"No, but two of us will leave," Natasha said, gesturing for Laura and Clint to go. "I'll stay and I won't interrupt unless it seems like you're in danger in some way. Clint, it'll be fine. She's not stupid."
"No, she isn't, but love makes you stupid," Clint muttered, but he did leave the room.
Wanda knew they could just hold the entire conversation telepathically, but didn't bother pointing this out. "Did you track me? I...did you know what...happened there?" she asked slowly. "On the Raft."
"I tracked your location with the mind stone. I saw you sitting in the cell, on a bit of the security footage Mr. Stark had access to. Secretary Ross would not provide any more. I believe I saw enough, though I know there was...much worse occurring there." Vision had only seen her restrained with that torture device and straitjacket looking drugged and dejected, and the collar shocking her once, nothing more. That was bad enough. "What happened?"
Wanda's first instinct was to just say she didn't want to talk about it, but maybe she should share, because if Vision knew just how bad it was, it might help because she was sure he was more concerned with protecting humans than obeying laws, whether he was 'programmed' to listen to orders or not. Torturing people, herself or otherwise, was not protecting. Instead she glanced at Natasha, hoping she would explain instead. I don't want to talk about it. I really, really don't.
"You want me to tell him?" Natasha asked in surprise. At Wanda's silent nod, Nat frowned. "I don't know everything, you know. If there's anything you want to add, interrupt."
Vision grew more and more horrified the more he heard. He supposed he should have known simply from seeing Wanda now, especially knowing it had already been about a week since the rescue, and she was still in such bad physical shape. The human girl was weak and injured, and because of their connection with the infinity stone in his own head, he felt like her mind was hurt too, something he could not quite process or describe but was there all the same. It was like she had wrapped the sad, sensitive parts of her in a shell of red chaos in an effort to protect herself and her enhancements. Vision found it disheartening and extremely strange, but had an odd human inclination not to ask Wanda about it even though he wanted to very badly. Asking would hurt her more, asking would be cruel, asking would most likely chase her away. "I am so sorry," he kept saying, over and over.
"Why did you not get her out of that hellish place yourself if you knew what was happening to her? You are clearly capable of breaking laws, because you're here now," Natasha pointed out.
Vision looked down at the injured girl cradled in his arms, blinked a few times, and then looked back at the Black Widow. "I do not know. I thought I had to follow my programming. The rules. I signed. Then I discovered Wanda was being mistreated almost immediately. That was wrong also. Breaking a law to protect her and get them all out was far less wrong than breaking that I am made to protect humans." Then he looked down at Wanda again, holding her closer, "Moreover, this one is different. She inexplicably makes me feel...human, though I am not. I care about her very much. I enjoy her company tremendously. She is special."
Nat decided not to ask for any more information, since quite frankly Vision probably wouldn't be able to explain, despite his articulate, formal English. "Do you understand that your choosing not to help immediately meant she was hurt far more than necessary?"
"Yes. I thought assisting from the side of the law and remaining behind the scenes for the rescue would help long term for her and other enhanced humans, but...I am not sure it was worth it. Wanda, would you like me to leave? If so, that is understandable."
"No. I missed you," Wanda said softly. Vision's logic did make sense. It sounded like he had believed leaving the physical rescue to Steve and Natasha was the right thing to do, so that he remained on the "correct" side of the law and could continue trying to assist from there. Steve and Nat were already on the run, so breaking the team out of the Raft didn't affect them as much. If Vision had rescued her and the others, he would be labeled a criminal too and would not be able to advocate for anyone, let alone her. And someone would probably want to take him apart for it, Wanda thought darkly, knowing quite well a lot of people did not think of Vision as his own person, just some fancy robot tech Tony had made. That was not fair either. With all of this logic in mind, she could definitely understand why Vision had not come for her, even if he knew she was being severely harmed in that place.
Natasha sighed. All of this seemed fine, but the synthezoid's presence still made her a little uneasy. It was clear he made Wanda happy-she was still curled up in his lap, her expression rather content, but still. This was not being very careful. If Vision did change his mind, he could just whisk Wanda away easily. She certainly didn't seem inclined to use her magic on him. Because he hasn't done anything, Nat reminded herself. If he does, she would at least try.
Vision knew quite well no one else besides Wanda wanted him there, but unless she told him to go away, he wasn't going to leave, either. He also rather wondered why she had said she looked ugly, when she was the same Wanda he always knew. Humans were confusing. Did she mean because she wasn't dressed up in one of her usual outfits? Or was it because she thought her injuries made her ugly? She never cared before. "Why did you say you looked ugly?" he asked earnestly. "It makes no sense."
Natasha resisted the urge to roll her eyes or snap at hearing that question. Wanda appeared nonplussed, so she could just answer herself. Wanda looked down at herself and then just found herself holding in laughter, because laughing hurt her ribs and she didn't want to hurt Vision's feelings for asking. "Vis, I am wearing lounge clothes. I have bruises, cuts, whatever else, all over. Look at me. I'm a mess." Then she realized speaking that much at once out loud didn't hurt. If she wanted to sign or something else, it would be because she wanted to be quiet or was scared to talk, not because it still hurt her throat to do so.
"Those things are not a 'mess'. You are still just you," Vision said matter-of-factly. "I do not like seeing you in pain, but you are not ugly for being hurt. Besides, would that not be hypocritical? I am not even human. I have red vibranium skin."
Wanda had known already that he didn't care what she looked like-or if he did, he liked what he saw-but it still felt nice to hear such sentiments anyway. "I don't care, you are human to me." You treat me like one. I'm not just...something to be feared. Like maybe I could just be a normal, ordinary girl. That seemed an odd way to think, considering they were both unusual, but maybe the unusualness canceled out or something. If Pietro was here, he would tease me, and I would fuss at him, and he would just laugh at me and then apologize if I was really upset.
Natasha found watching the two together to be quite entertaining, if Vision wasn't going to turn them in. It was hilarious that Vision only used phrases like 'enjoyed her company tremendously' and 'this one is different' when watching him made it exceedingly clear he loved Wanda very much, and wasn't just fascinated with her little idiosyncrasies. He was still holding her close, but also gently stroking her hair now. "You two have an audience," she commented, spying Lila and Cooper peeking into the living room.
"That is PDA, ew," Cooper announced, realizing he and his sister had been spotted, even though he didn't really mind and the two weren't really doing anything. He just felt like teasing.
Lila thought it was sweet; she marched right into the living room up to Vision and said, "I think you are Wanda's alien prince and she's a magical princess."
"I am a synthezoid." Vision looked down at Wanda again. "She is not a princess, but I will treat her like one, if she allows it."
"Get fancy outfits and go to a fancy dinner," Lila suggested, clearly pleased with herself.
"Okay, that's enough for now, Lila, Cooper, please go upstairs," Natasha told the children, ushering them out.
Wanda thought she would not mind something like Lila's idea one bit, but obviously even if Vision also wanted to do such a thing with her, it was impossible and unsafe right now. Instead she closed her eyes and snuggled closer. She didn't particularly want her hair touched at all, because Vision was not Natasha and someone besides Nat messing with her hair reminded her of those guards on the Raft grabbing at it to inject things into her neck. But she did not want to chase him away, either, though she supposed Natasha would scold her for not expressing her own boundaries. I should say something. I really should say something.
"She doesn't want her hair touched," Nat said sharply. It was easy enough for her to tell, and she knew why, too, even though Wanda had not explained anything about it. After seeing the security footage, she knew exactly why Wanda had gotten all emotional about her hair when she'd let Nat braid it right after the escape in the Norway safe house. Because the only time anyone touched it for three weeks was someone yanking it to inject drugs into her. Nat wasn't sure why Wanda didn't mind her messing with her hair, since she had willingly allowed Natasha to take care of it for her every day since with no problem whatsoever, but the girl clearly wasn't comfortable right now.
Wanda immediately felt Vision's hand move from her hair to her shoulder, and she knew Nat was going to question her later why she didn't say anything herself. I don't know. I felt like it was mean to say it, I guess. I don't want him to leave, and I know he's not going to pull it or drug me. I'm being stupid. Again.
"Is this better?" Vision sounded entirely unbothered; if Wanda did not want him to touch her hair, then he would not do so. It just puzzled him since previously she did not mind and actually said it made her happy when he did ask. But he did not want to make her upset in any way or hurt her further.
Wanda only nodded and didn't say anything, something about the simple question and being held making any words she wanted to say choke up inside. There was a small sliver of her that worried all of this kindness Vis was willing to give her now was just some ploy to make her trust him so he could take her away from the house without a fuss. After all, maybe her power still wasn't functioning normally, but under ordinary circumstances, she could literally put him through the floor. He might just logically assume he could not take her anywhere by force. That it would be easier to make her trust him because goodness knew she was stupid and broken and the only truly vulnerable part of her was the mess that was her head. He couldn't possibly want her. What did the kind, protective red synthezoid want with an enhanced human girl that had done the things she had? Stop it, just stop. I would know if he lied to me. He's not lying, he came here because he cares, not to take me, dump me back in the Raft. I know that. She didn't want him to go away; she liked him holding her.
"Would you prefer not to be held at all?" Vision's concerned voice broke into Wanda's mixed-up musings. Usually there were some thoughts Wanda let him see from her without even trying to share them, but all he could feel from her right now was that she was mostly happy but some undercurrent of fear and pain lay beneath. She felt closed off to him, her power, her magic, all stuffed down something darkly smothering her. It was not what Wanda normally felt like to him, even when she was feeling depressed or scared.
"No, this is nice." I'm sorry. I like him here, I just...I'm having trouble thinking clearly.
"You feel...smothered. Is there something I can do to help you feel better?" Vision asked cautiously.
Wanda instinctively glanced over at Natasha, who only gave her an encouraging smile but said nothing. I don't want to explain. Vis feels my magic not...functioning properly. I'm sure of it. "I don't know," she whispered. "I'm sorry. I like you holding me very much, but I don't want to talk. Not...right now. Can we just...sit?" There. That was the truth. Nat would be pleased she had told the truth, and Vision certainly did not want her to lie. I know he would be hurt if I did. I have nothing to fear here. It's okay to relax, it's okay to be happy Vis came to see me. I am safe.
"Of course."
Notes:
Okay so I absolutely despise the “romance fixes everything” trope, so that is not happening here. She loves Vision, but I felt like Wanda has so much trouble trusting people that I didn’t think she would automatically trust him implicitly without question even though she’s genuinely happy he is there. Not yet.
Also imma be honest, this is my first time attempting to actually capture a romantic relationship for my MC so I am really sorry if it doesn’t...come through properly. I will do my best! xD
(For anyone reading my other fic I’m sharing here currently, ch3 is in progress, but it was making me sad to work on/edit due to some dark/depressing content Absolutely Necessary to move the story forward, so uhhh...yeah, it’ll be up soon hopefully. Just not yet!)
Chapter 10: Chapter 10
Summary:
In which Vision’s visit to the vacation house to see Wanda is cut short by an unexpected warning, and the three rogue Avengers currently hidden there must leave temporarily. Wanda and Nat successfully make it safely to a motel.
Notes:
I honestly originally wanted Vision to stay and visit longer than this, but I found this setup to make much more sense for future story/character development/plot/etc. There is plenty plenty plenty of time for him and Wanda to spend time together later on:) *cough* what IW there is totally more than two years to go *cough*
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“Clint, she isn't a little kid like Lila. Let Wanda be," Laura scolded upstairs, watching her husband pace back and forth in their bedroom. "He makes her happy. That's a good thing."
"He's hanging all over her! She's hurt, remember? What if that robot decides he's supposed to turn all of us in? That he's not supposed to be breaking the law by visiting in the first place?"
"Oh, he is not hanging all over her. I bet if you go back downstairs and check, he's still just innocently holding her. I don't get the impression either of them are going to jump to doing much else right now anyway. Frankly if he was going to turn on her, he would have done it already."
Clint stopped pacing and sighed. "That, is the other thing. I can't help wondering if he's just interested in Wanda because she fascinates him...because she's also connected to that mind stone because of her enhancements. I don't want her hanging around someone just attracted to what she has rather than who she is."
"I think she would know if that was the case," Laura said. Privately she thought it had started that way and just wasn't now; why wouldn't it have started with that? It was a natural connection, Wanda felt she didn't fit in correctly anywhere, and here was this other being that also didn't fit in correctly and had a connection to the mind stone, just like her. The Vision probably liked that there was this young pretty human that enjoyed his company and tried to explain human things to him, and she grew on him until she was more than just something that he found interesting. "I think if she did think that was all Vision liked about her, she wouldn't have anything to do with him anymore."
"And she would be hurt. I couldn't do anything to protect her in that prison. Couldn't help her, couldn't even get them to just leave her alone in that cell and stop torturing her. It's partially my fault she ended up in there in the first place. I sure as heck am going to protect her now."
"Clint, will you think for two seconds? Wanda is her own person. She knows letting Vision into her heart might hurt later, but she's deemed him worth that risk. Let her have that. And it is not your fault any of you ended up in the Raft. You did help her. You gave her someone to talk to." Laura shook her head and added quietly, "Quite frankly I don't think she would be here now if you hadn't been there for her in that place."
"I fetched the kid from the Compound, Laura. She might have been pissy about being kept on a fancy house arrest courtesy of Tony telling Vision to keep her there, sure, but at least she was safe." Clint resumed pacing, back and forth, back and forth.
Laura suspected Wanda would not have been safe there indefinitely anyway, not with people like Ross looking for an excuse to neutralize her. She could remember Nat calling the farm and complaining about Ross even before all the current Accords issues occurred, calling him several colorful names, and annoyed but unsurprised that he didn't like her or Wanda seemingly due to where they were from. "Steve's friend would probably be dead then. Sounded like the team needed her in the airport. Nat and Steve got all four of you out. Wanda will be okay. She just needs some more time, like when we had her on the farm last year."
"Honey, she's not okay. You've seen her!"
"I have, and I'm saying she will be okay. She's healing, she's already so, so much better than when you and Nat brought her here. You are so concerned about Wanda, and you need help yourself. You're so jumpy and snappish all the time." Laura put her hands on his shoulders to make him stop pacing. "Don't think I haven't noticed you getting up during the night to check and see if all of your kids are here and safe. Then during the day, you make excuses repeatedly to check if Wanda wants anything, even though you know Nat is with her. You just want to see for yourself that she's safe."
Clint sighed deeply. "I'm trained to deal with this, I'm-"
"You are not. You watched someone you think of as a surrogate kid be tortured for weeks. Your training never, ever accounted for such a thing. The fact that Wanda was relying on you to keep her sane and calmer in that place doesn't help, either."
"That's not her fault!"
Laura gave him a hug. "No, of course not, but being a trusted source of support is tiring, too, especially in a situation like that. Go take a hike up the hill out back in the woods for awhile. Get out of the house. You haven't been outside at all after we unloaded the car when you first arrived, besides going out on the balcony deck and yesterday afternoon when all of us went out to the pool."
"Nat and Wanda haven't either," Clint pointed out grumpily.
"Nat has gone in the pool with the kids, and she's been outside more than you at least. She was not trapped in the Raft recently, either. Even Wanda was able to come outside yesterday for awhile herself."
"She couldn't even go in the pool!"
"She didn't go in the pool all the way because Nat told her not to due to those burns on her neck not being healed enough yet, not because she couldn't or didn't want to," Laura corrected. "I seem to remember her quite content sitting on the edge dipping her feet in; she liked being outside."
"Then she was so tired she slept the rest of the day after she went back inside."
"So? She was happy the whole time, other than those few minutes she was telling Nat about something that made her upset. I think her being happy is much more significant than her still needing extra sleep. And it's good that she's voluntarily talking about things that bother her." Laura gazed at him knowingly. "You are staying indoors and not taking walks because she can't yet. Out. Go take a hike. You hate being cooped up. Why don't you take Lila and Coop with you? Nat and I can stay here to keep an eye on Wanda and Nate."
"And if Stark's robot turns on us while I'm off with two of our kids?"
"Then Wanda will kick him out."
"I don't think she can right now, even if she did want to! That's why I especially don't want him here. What are any of the rest of us supposed to do if that happened?"
Laura sighed. "I think that if Vision did plan to do anything, he wouldn't have bothered with his ridiculous plumber disguise. He would have just shown up in the night and phased right into the house. Besides, Tony set this place up, remember? Why would he do that and then send Vision here to rat you out or take Wanda away? That doesn't make any sense."
"If Ross suspects Tony is indirectly helping hide her, that's why. Nat too, really. You know he would. Remember, we know he's negotiating on behalf of Scott, Sam, and me. He either doesn't want to or can't negotiate for Nat, who knows...probably doesn't want to for Steve, and he definitely can't for Wanda whether he wants to or not." Clint ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "She's simultaneously stronger and weaker than all of us. Little walking paradox, that's what she is, and it's why idiots like Ross can't stand her."
"Ross can't stand her because she scares him and she's enhanced," Laura told him, certain she was correct. "You know that's why he hurt her. Not to find the other rogues. Not to make any of you talk. I don't need to see him to know that much. The man wanted to break her. Logic says if any of you would talk you'd do it within the first couple days, and obviously none of you did."
"Sometimes I'm scared it worked."
"I know, but I also know you know it most definitely did not work. Because all I see is the same girl I met last year dealing with yet more trauma in a far healthier manner than back then. She might be scared of that man, but she also adamantly hates him, she'd rip him a new one if he went after her again. Also, she works with you and Nat at a very stressful job on top of that."
"I have no idea what any of us are supposed to do next. We can't stay here forever."
"Realistically? You will get house arrest, we'll go home to the farm, and Nat and Wanda will go off to do secret missions with Steve," Laura said calmly. "It may even be a good thing the Vision has a soft spot for Wanda. If Tony's team is sent to...search for them, then he can tell Vision if they're realistically too close, because he can just warn them to conveniently move before they are 'found'." She smiled at Natasha, who had appeared in the doorway.
"Nat, did you leave her with Vision?" Clint asked suspiciously.
"Yes, because we have a problem, and it isn't him. Literally while we were sitting there, he got a message from Tony saying he should come back to the Compound ASAP, because they're sending a team simply to prove that Laura and the littles are the only ones here." Natasha suspected that this very convenient message had been sent knowing that Vision was there, would warn them, and they'd have time to get out and no one would be any the wiser. Tony might even have stalled Ross coming around the Compound to the day he knew Vision was coming to visit. "Coop and Lila have gone up to their rooms."
"Take the SUV and just drive off for a day or two. You have a burner phone, right, Nat?" Laura asked, already starting to gather the few items Clint had out in their bedroom.
"I do. New number again, I'll give it to you. Vision brought Wanda's from the Compound. He said he'd done something to it to scramble any signal someone might try to trace or track, so she can use it safely as long as she doesn't post pictures on social media, obviously. I don't think she has any, anyway." Natasha paused, thinking. "Clint, when Vision leaves, you go with him. Get out of the immediate vicinity and then you take his truck. He can fly back to the Compound like he's supposed to. Wanda and I will take the gray SUV we arrived in."
"That's fine for me, but what about you two?" Clint asked sharply. "You can't hide Wanda, and she'll make it harder for you to blend in too."
"We'll make it work. Clint, we will be fine. We'll either skip around rest stops, or head out and just find us a cheap hotel, I think."
_________________
"You are certain you do not wish me to remain here?" Vision asked downstairs.
"Yes. You can't help us if you get labeled a criminal too." Wanda was relieved at hearing the offer, but she knew it wasn't a good idea. If Vision did stay, then he wouldn't be able to continue his work from the other side of the law. Even coming here in the first place was risky. "Did...did he know y-you came here?" she asked hesitantly.
"I did not tell Mr. Stark explicitly, but I know that he knew, because he said I should be prepared for you to not wish to see me, and suggested today was a good day to come," Vision told her. "There was a message, too."
He knew Ross would do this and wanted Vis to warn us...conveniently. Wanda's expression instantly closed off. "I don't want to hear anything from Tony Stark, Vis. I'm sorry. I'm not ready yet," she sent mentally. ”You can tell him I said that. I don't mind."
Vision did not press; he merely nodded. "He seems to think you hate him."
"I do not hate him. I just..." Wanda didn't know how to articulate her feelings regarding Iron Man at all. Mostly, she just didn't want to waste any more mental energy on him. "I don't want to think about him," she said finally. She caught Vision's curious gaze on her bandaged neck and instinctively tensed her shoulders, self-conscious even though she knew he was just wondering if she was okay. "I'm fine."
Vision did not believe she was 'fine'. "Do you need anything to make it stop paining you?"
"Not unless you can erase burns. Vis, please. You need to go. I'm not alone here. I will be fine," Wanda said firmly, and then was surprised at herself for actually believing that. Whatever was going on now, she trusted that Nat and Clint would come up with something. And I'm not completely helpless, either. I can at least use a little bit of my magic easily if I really need to. "But, I...I would like if...you visit again." She frowned, eyeing Vision's pocket and wondering when he had gotten a phone. "Are you going to check that?"
Vision's synthetic expression grew darker in a way Wanda hadn't seen from him before after reading the message; he looked angry. "Secretary Ross is at the Compound," he said in a strangely flat tone.
Wanda found it a bit unnerving that her own mannerisms of speaking that way when displeased sometimes seemed to have rubbed off on him, though obviously Vision didn't have the same accent she did. "...Can I see?"
'Vision, you'd best finish buying your paprikash ingredients and get back here ASAP. Step on it. Already told you, Ross is here and he's not happy at being made to wait. Wants to send a small team out arriving in three hours simply to prove no ex-Avengers being present in my vacation house I lent Laura Barton, and you're not here.'
Wanda thought Tony knew exactly what Vision was doing and that he would warn them, both because of the paprikash comment and now giving a specific time frame. It was, admittedly, nice that he was doing this much. She still didn't want to talk about or to him, but at least she knew for sure he wasn't trying very hard-or at all!-to apprehend the rogue Avengers. Mostly just the idea that Ross was somewhat nearby unnerved her, even though she knew that if she did run into that man, it wasn't like he could do anything to her unless she let him recapture her. Which, she thought morbidly, was never going to happen; she would kill herself before letting Ross have her again if necessary. "You should go."
"All right, you two, we need to get out of here," Natasha informed them as she returned to the living room, bags from upstairs in hand. She put Wanda's duffel and the backpack Vision had brought for her on the sofa next to her within reach. "Wanda, you're coming with me. Find your boots. Don't put on all of your normal everyday jewelry that Vision retrieved for you from the Compound," she added, noticing that Wanda seemed to have already slipped several rings on her good hand. "Keep a couple on if you want, but you need to take the rest off."
Wanda looked mildly disappointed but listened, struggling to get her bad hand to cooperate enough to pull the extra rings off, which was not working. She could understand why Nat didn't want her wearing them-they were something people could use to help identify her if others had noticed she wore them all the time before. Though, she couldn't help thinking that right now there were a lot of other more obvious things that would immediately ID her than some rings.
"You have a little under three hours, unless Mr. Stark is able to stall the secretary longer," Vision said. He showed Nat the most recent message, figuring this would help prove the information.
Natasha glanced at it and nodded. "That'll be plenty of time. Can you let Clint take your truck? I figured you two could take it a little ways from here and then you fly back to the Compound."
"Yes, of course."
"Then you can help Clint and Laura load up. I'm going to help Wanda get ready to leave."
___________________
Loading up everything into the two vehicles didn't take long. "I will come find you if you wish," Vision told Wanda quietly, back in his human disguise again for now.
Wanda kept her good hand on the car for balance as she shook her head. "You can't be caught with me. I'm not the only enhanced person that...needs someone willing to...help." I don't know how to explain, but this is much bigger than just me, or even all of the rogue Avengers team. To her, Vision needed to stay on the good side of the official laws, because if he did end up getting caught with her, then even assuming they got away safely, Vision would no longer have any potential influence to get the Accords altered. She also suspected that if Vision did get found out, Tony would also get into trouble as well, because everyone considered Vis to be 'Stark's robot' even though he was not the only one who made him. While she had no wish to speak to Iron Man herself, she didn't want him getting dumped in that despicable prison, either. Wanda suspected Tony's endless money and tech could save him from that fate if something like that did happen, but still.
"Let's get going here," Nat said quickly. "Wanda, tell him good-bye. We need to go now. There's no way to know if Ross plans to just send some ordinary reconnaissance team here to 'check' sooner than what he told Tony. I doubt he trusts Tony completely, to be honest."
Wanda didn't even say anything else to Vision; she just lifted her hand unsteadily and gave him a hug. Vision did tell her goodbye and that he would try to come find her soon if it was safe to do so, and she nodded, letting Nat help her climb in. The idea of having to ride in a car again was extremely unappealing and starting to make her anxious already, and the door wasn't even shut yet. I'm fine. I'm fine, it's not even dark, and I don't feel confused and sluggish now.
"See you two in a day or two, hopefully," Clint was saying now. "You and Nat be safe."
"We're fine, Clint," Nat said firmly. "Hey, you might have more trouble staying hidden and safe than we will," she teased. "People always underestimate Wanda and me when we aren't recognized."
___________________
Wanda squeezed her eyes shut the second the door closed and the other two Avengers had departed down the winding gravel driveway. I can't do this. I am going to mess up and get us caught.
"...can do this. You're safe," Natasha was saying calmly.
Wanda glanced at Nat worriedly. "I'm going to...get us caught," she whispered. M-A-Y-B-E L-E-A-V-E M-E H-E-R-E.
Nat did not expressly tell Wanda she wouldn't get them caught, because that was a legitimate concern. "Leaving you behind isn't an option. We're going to avoid attention if possible, but even if we do get pulled over or otherwise need to produce an ID, we have fake ones. Yes, it's true I can be on the run more easily alone. Still not leaving you. You're part of the team." She paused, studying the younger girl closely. Last time, riding in a car had made Wanda panic, or rather, the seatbelt did. Nat doubted one week would have erased this fear. "What exactly about being in the car is making you anxious?"
I didn't say anything. Wanda figured she should just tell the truth. Maybe it would help, and anyway, she knew Natasha wasn't going to think whatever she said was stupid. "It's...closed in," she murmured finally. Then, because she didn't want to explain it verbally, she signed that the seatbelt was going to make her feel like she was being restrained again. "And it...hurts, which makes it...harder to...convince myself I'm not there anymore." I hope that makes sense? It doesn't even make sense to me.
"All right. Thank you for explaining honestly." This was something to work from, at least. Natasha considered this for a moment; they could not just sit there and let Wanda get used to riding in the car again right now, and there wasn't any quick fix, either. She opened all the windows a crack, figuring that might help at least somewhat with the closed-in part, and then focused back on Wanda. "We're going to buckle the seatbelt quickly, and you are going to describe to me exactly where we are. I don't want to scare you, but we cannot instantly make this comfortable for you, and we need to get out of here."
Wanda nodded but stayed quiet; she could feel Nat's gaze on her waiting for her to talk and she reluctantly obeyed. "Outside the vacation house. Inside a...a gray car. I can hear birds. I see clouds. One looks like...a cat. There are-"
The unwanted seatbelt pulled across her body and buckled closed, and Wanda instantly jerked in her seat, squeezing her eyes shut again. She felt a gentle squeeze on her shaking fist and knew Nat was hoping a bit of physical contact would help ground her. It did help, a tiny bit anyway. I'm still scared. Why am I like this? Just...stop it. Stop it, stop it.
"Wanda, open your eyes and look at me," Nat ordered, keeping her voice quiet. "Tell me where we are."
"It...warm."
"Yes, it's warm in here. It was cold in the Raft. So you cannot be in that place now, no?"
Wanda still didn't relax, but she did open her eyes. Tiny red wisps hazed her fingers defensively, but she did not use them for anything, and strangely her friend had not shoved her dangerous hand away, nor were the little bits of scarlet harming Nat in any way, either. She pulled her own hand away all the same. "No. I'm in the car...w-with you. And you weren't s-stuck in there," she whispered. I'm fine. I'm with Nat, and we're sitting in the SUV. I am not in that awful place again. This is real.
Satisfied that Wanda was not going to have a full-blown panic attack, Nat sighed in relief. It was obvious the girl was still very anxious-the little defensive scarlet wisps being visible said that much-but she was thinking clearly, at least. That would have to be enough for now. "That's right. Do you want a pillow for your arm? I threw a couple in the back."
"...Yes."
Natasha reached back to grab one and slid it under Wanda's injured arm. "I'm going to drive now. When you're able, I need you to put the defensive magic away. Then you can pick out some music for us." She began backing up to turn their car around and head out, and realized Wanda had closed her eyes again, her shoulders visibly tense and trembling. "Don't close your eyes until we get out of the driveway. It won't be as jerky once we get out on the road, so it won't hurt as much. Look outside instead, please."
Wanda nodded. Okay. Those are simple things. I can do that. She knew Natasha was just trying to distract her, but having simple things she was supposed to do was helpful, as usual. "Can I...get rid of the magic...a-after we are...off the driveway? It...helps."
"That's fine." Natasha knew she was going to have to discuss this later, because that magic was the most identifying thing about Wanda, and they couldn't have her going about visibly using it as a reminder that she could do so now, just to keep herself calm. There were plenty of other dark-haired, green-eyed females around Wanda's age. There was only one that also had mysterious magical enhancements nobody understood, and was injured, and had a Sokovian accent. "Tell me something you would like to do if this were a real vacation and not a forced mess of sorts."
Wanda blinked, realizing that being told it was fine and simply hearing Natasha's voice continue talk to her rather made it feel like she...didn't need to see her magic to know she could access a little of it if she wished. The scarlet wisps retreated, and she balled her hand into a fist instead, gazing out the window. "Swimming. I'd like that," she decided.
"You mean you'd like to doggy paddle for ten seconds and then just lay around in the pool on a...an inflatable," Nat teased, realizing saying 'raft' probably was not the best word to say right now. Luckily she'd caught it in time. "Assuming we get to come back in a couple days as planned, you can do that soon. You just need to wait for those burns to heal more first."
"Raft. The good kind," Wanda said, knowing quite well what word had not been said. "You can say the word around me." Why does that not bother me and being in a car...does? I don't understand. She did feel much better about the situation than the first time she'd been in a vehicle, probably because it was not dark outside, she didn't have remnants of unknown sedatives still in her system anymore, and she didn't feel quite so helpless now. Not great by any means, but still. "They weren't saying the...the word all...the t-time or anything." Wanda tugged at her seatbelt nervously, her palm slick with cold sweat. I need to calm down. I want it off. And my arm hurts.
Natasha didn't like still hearing the shaky hesitant tone, but figured there wasn't much to be done to help Wanda further right now. She would probably remain uncomfortable and anxious until they could get out and be safe somewhere new. At least she was engaging when spoken to. "Driveway's done. No more gravel."
Thank goodness. "Where will we go?" Wanda asked after a minute.
"I don't know. If you think you can stay in-character long enough for us to get into a hotel, we can do that once we're out of the area. Otherwise, I'm finding rest stops and we can skip from place to place every three or four hours since those all have time limits." Natasha sighed, unsure which would be worse: take the risk of getting Wanda into a hotel room safely unrecognized, or take the risk of making her anxious enough to make a visible reaction with her magic by being stuck in the car.
"I would rather have to...hold together for a few minutes' acting, than...be stuck in here." Wanda knew exactly what her friend meant, because if they did go to a hotel, then they needed a story and she couldn't be herself; she needed to be the ordinary girl on her fake papers, Lina Kostić.
"Then I'm trusting you not to use your magic. You cannot let it out because you're feeling panicked or anxious. You cannot let it out just because we see someone vaguely suspicious of us."
"I know."
"I'm reminding you, because you're using it as a defense mechanism on instinct. Think of this as an ongoing undercover mission. No using your powers unless we absolutely cannot talk our way out and we can't simply run or drive off either. I'm worried if someone does recognize us and they know nothing except what has been on the news recently, they may not...react well to seeing your powers, even if they'd be horrified knowing details of what happened to you."
Wanda knew what that meant also; she could just imagine what the media had been saying about her. She slowly pulled out her phone and simply put her own name and the word 'avenger' in the search engine. It took a few tries to type it out because her hand was still so shaky, and she dropped the phone in her lap once, but she finally managed. Then she frowned, more curious than disturbed at the first result. "Someone thinks I...made Captain America not sign the Accords?"
Nat's head whipped toward her younger teammate and then back to the road. "Close that garbage right now, Wanda. You don't need to read that."
Wanda continued doomscrolling, her curiosity piqued. There were a whole slew of unsavory descriptions in this article, but she also noticed that in the comment section, there were quite a few people that clearly disagreed with the article too, along with the crude and offensive ones.
'F in the chat for the rest of us. I'd rather have the newbie and the other heroes around, thanks. Where tf are they now?' There were several replies to this comment with ideas for where the rogue Avengers might be, all of which were wildly inaccurate.
'HEY ROGUE AVENGERS IF U READ THIS WE LOVE U'
'Accords are shit. Who cares if the foreign enhanced girl did convince Captain America not to sign? Good for her.' This comment had many more replies than the other one had, and a lot of them were nasty. "Nat...I don't even know some of these words-"
"I told you to stop reading that," Natasha interrupted. "I mean it. Stop or I'm taking the phone away from you."
You're my friend and mentor, not my mother, Wanda thought peevishly, but she did exit the page and quickly pull up Spotify instead. "Music choices?"
Natasha was glad Wanda seemed to have obeyed and moved on. "Nope, I told you that you could choose. Just pick whatever you'd like."
Wanda scrolled about on her playlists for a bit before finally selecting a song she thought about quite often.
"...I try to; I desire to know who I am
And I fight to; find it tough to be myself
And all those words I didn't say, the dreams I had or have today
And pain I feared and faced and went away
The things I've done, the games I played, made me to what I am..."
"This is rather sad," Nat said quietly, but she was used to hearing the sounds of both vintage sitcoms and quite a lot of Wanda's preferred music coming from her room back at the Avengers Compound before all of this had happened.
"I know. I like this song." Wanda had her eyes closed again, but she seemed slightly less tense now. Being with Nat and having music to listen to made riding in the car at least bearable, even if she still hated it.
They drove in silence aside from the music for awhile, until Natasha realized they would have to stop, because they needed gas. "I'm going to pull in here to get us some gas. You are going to have to wait in the car while I go in to pay cash. I'll be right back." She knew leaving Wanda unattended in their car wasn't the best idea, but there wasn't anything else for them to do at the moment. "You absolutely cannot let your magic out. Even if you feel panicky, you must keep your powers inside. Open your window all the way if you need to, but don't get out or try to follow me."
"...Okay."
"I'll come right back. You can see the register inside from here. I am going to walk in, pay, and come straight out."
"Okay," Wanda said again.
"Repeat back to me what we are doing." Nat could tell Wanda did not want to be left alone in the car, but she wouldn't say so, and even if she did, Nat could not take her inside the store safely right now.
"Getting gas. I have to wait here. But I will be able...to see you the...whole time. I can't...use any magic." Wanda felt herself growing more and more jumpy; she wanted to get out. I'm fine. I can wait for her to come back. I survived that prison. I think I can wait in a nice warm car for a few minutes.
____________________
Everything went smoothly until Natasha was finished filling the gas tank. Wanda remained anxiously watching her, fingers nervously tapping the door, but she did not feel like she was going to have another episode, either. Then there was a cop car pulling up at the pump next to theirs, and Wanda instantly felt herself shoving terrified Wanda down and yanking out confused Lina instead. That I can do. Don't say a word. Let Ana handle it if we have to talk to him, she ordered herself, remembering the name Nat was using currently.
But the policeman seemed to just be getting gas himself, and paid them no mind whatsoever. Natasha climbed back into the car nonchalantly and pulled out, not appearing concerned at all. "See, no problem. That wasn't so bad, was it?"
"There was a cop," Wanda whispered, her hand clearly nervous and twitchy as she tapped her fingers on the door.
"And you visibly pulled out your Lina alias. I saw you. It was subtle, but you did. I think you're underestimating yourself. I'll bet you even gave Lina Kostić some basic story, even though we haven't really talked about it yet."
"I...did." Wanda realized this was true. Those pieces fell into place for her smoothly now. She was not nearly as good at such things as the Black Widow, but she could do it, because she and Pietro had plenty of experience acting when they were little and trying to, well, steal food and blankets and such to survive. And now she also had a year of being with the Avengers and learning to use those same old acting skills on undercover missions. "I decided Lina is a Sokovian refugee, like me. But she doesn't speak much English. She has a cousin that grew up here-you. Ana invited her on a road trip, but on the way to...to meet you, Lina was involved in a car accident." Wanda paused, wondering if Nat approved of this story, but the older Avenger was unreadable. "We, um...decided to...have the trip anyway?"
Natasha knew Wanda wanted her opinion on the made-up backstory. "Anything else?"
"I think we should change my hair," Wanda said quietly, eyeing Nat's short blonde bob. If Natasha had changed her hair, she probably should too. I can't instantly fix being injured, but we could change my hair, at least. She rested her head back against the seat and chewed the inside of her lip, realizing she hadn't been up this long at once at all so far. There was a reason for this; she was so, so tired and sore, and she suddenly wished she was back at the vacation house in the bedroom with Lila next to her and Nat chilling over on her own bed.
Nat actually had considered this already, but hadn't wanted to suggest it yet when she knew Wanda didn't feel well. "I have a few different colors of dye in my suitcase. You can pick something out and we'll do that as soon as we can. The story is fine." She glanced at Wanda for a second, thinking that the younger girl's tone was starting to sound a bit 'off' in the way that meant she was tired and in pain but not wanting to admit it. "Let's find a cheap motel for the evening. It's already after six anyway."
_______________
Looking it up online from Wanda's phone, they finally found one that satisfied Nat's criteria: a free breakfast, decent outdoor lighting, something inexpensive, and no lobby where they had to go through it to access the rooms. It would be easier to get Wanda into the room safely if they only had to get from the car across the parking lot directly to the room than through a lobby where there would definitely be people watching them. Without access to using credit cards right now, they had a limited amount of cash on hand to use, and she didn't want to blow any of it on some expensive hotel. Frankly if Wanda was not still anxious about the car and hurt besides, both of which would make it difficult for her to rest in the car, Natasha would just have them sleep in the car and take turns driving. Once in the parking lot, Nat turned to Wanda again. "I'm going to go in the lobby and book us a room. I'll come right back, just like at the gas station, okay?"
"It has to be." Wanda knew she was starting to just shut down for the day entirely, because she simultaneously felt grumpy, exhausted, and frightened. Knowing that just made it feel worse, because she knew all of this would not be nearly as bothersome if it wasn't for her. Natasha continuing to be so patient with her was...guilt-inducing. Instead of just easily slipping off on her own, Nat was stuck dragging her around instead.
Wanda really did not think she was adding anything to this fugitive venture at all. "Nat," she said quietly, "if you want to leave, it...is fine."
"No. That's not fine. If it was me who was injured, would you leave me?"
"Definitely no."
"Then don't suggest that again."
"If you are caught with me, they...won't be fair to you." Wanda did not actually want Natasha to leave her anywhere, but logically she felt otherwise.
Natasha sighed. "To be honest, I don't think I'd get a fair deal from Ross if caught whether I was with you or not. We just have to not be caught, then. Let's get ourselves safely inside and regroup. I'll be right back again, same as we did earlier for the gas."
_____________________
Natasha returned from successfully booking the room for two nights to find Wanda curled into a ball in her seat, her knees pulled to her chest, though there was thankfully no sign of any scarlet wisps, either. "We have a room. You don't have to stay in here anymore." When Wanda didn't answer or look up at all, she gently touched Wanda's shoulder to get her attention. Instantly Wanda's head jerked up and the girl squeezed herself against the car door. "Wanda, it's just me. You are safe."
Wanda blinked and slowly nodded, trying to get herself to relax again. S-O-R-R-Y S-O J-U-M-P-Y. T-I-R-E-D, she signed.
"That's fine. Let's get you safe inside the room, and then I can come back to grab our bags." Nat suspected Wanda was not just 'jumpy', because now she wasn't talking out loud again, and she looked like she'd been crying. "Can you be Lina just until we're inside? That's all I need." Hopefully no one would talk to them at all, but Natasha didn't want to risk helping Wanda out of the car and inside the hotel room until she was sure Wanda was thinking clearly enough to be her made-up alias if she really had to. That, and to make sure she wouldn't let her magic react defensively on instinct should someone talk to them.
I can do that much. Wanda nodded again and yanked her hood over her hair, thinking if she and Natasha were going to dye her hair, she should hide her brunette hair now so no one would see it. Then whenever they left, anyone that potentially saw her would just assume her hair had been the new color all along. She still didn't feel like talking out loud yet, but she did sign that she was ready.
"Lina wouldn't know ASL letters. Lina can talk to her cousin Ana in Sokovian or her limited English, or she can just not say anything until they are inside. Ana doesn't care which." Natasha thought for a moment and then just climbed back into the car herself, pulling partway around the motel parking lot in front of room 199. She hadn't personally cared about the distance from the parking spot to the room, but Wanda could not walk far yet and this would be better. "All right, let's try again. Room 199 is right there."
Wanda glanced out the window and realized the motel room was still a good two or three times the distance from the bit she'd walked out onto the balcony deck back at the vacation house. I'm going to collapse and some random person might come over to help, and then we might get caught. “I can't walk that far," she admitted reluctantly.
Natasha sighed, knowing the younger Avenger must feel awful if she was expressing that out loud without being prodded or asked. "Then I'll carry you to the door, and you will stand there while I unlock it. Let's get inside. I don't want us outside here after dark, especially you." While she was not concerned about running into an ordinary unsavory per se, it would also be more than a bit suspicious if a couple of what appeared to be random young women beat the crap out of some mugger or something. That certainly would not help them to stay hidden.
Wanda didn't protest; she willingly let her friend lift her out of the car and over to the door. She kept her head down once Nat set her gently on her feet, but she couldn't help feeling tense anyway. There was someone walking by, someone she instinctively knew she didn't want near them instantly. I don't like his eyes. “Ana, I-"
"I know. Get inside," Natasha whispered, pushing Wanda ahead of her, shutting and locking the door behind them quickly. She heard a small thump and muffled yelp, and located a lamp before checking on Wanda.
Wanda was on the floor now, kneeling and leaning on her good hand, her eyes screwed shut again and breathing hard. That man is still out there. He has no idea who we are, but he would hurt us if he could anyway. Though she had not literally read his mind, both instinct and common sense said they were in a not-so-great part of town and this man thought they were a couple of easy targets. He emitted malice like Damian back at that prison to her, and she didn't like it. This one might hurt them like Nat had been concerned might have happened to her in that prison but hadn't; he'd been eyeing Natasha when she had seen his eyes for a moment. She wanted to chase him away, knew she could, but if she did then her friend might be mad at her. They were safe now. She was not supposed to use mind tricks on people. We are fine. I need to calm down. "He's still there," she said finally.
"You're safe. He can't hurt you in here," Natasha said firmly.
"No, I mean..." Wanda hesitated, unsure how to explain what precisely had disturbed her about this man without sounding like she had poked around in his head, or that she was just freaking out without good reason. "I think that man wants you," she whispered, "I did not like his eyes."
"Did he pay any mind to you when you saw his eyes?" Nat asked sharply, far more concerned with that than the fact that this lowlife might mean harm to her.
Wanda shook her head, sure of that much, at least. It was like I wasn't even there. "He was focused on you," she continued whispering. "Not...not like he knew you at all, just..." Much to her surprise, Natasha actually chuckled a bit. Why is that funny?
"Oh, forget him. I've seen worse on those honeypot missions you know I hate. He's not going to hurt us. Let's get you settled in bed, and then I'll get our bags and get our unwanted visitor out of here." Natasha figured as long as this man hadn't been paying any attention to Wanda anyway and would therefore be unable to describe her, it would be easy enough to get rid of him before he actually caused them any problems.
Wanda wondered what exactly Nat planned to do to get rid of the man, but realized she did not care what happened to him at all, so long as her friend didn't get hurt. She glanced around the tiny motel room cautiously as Natasha helped her onto one of the beds. It seemed rundown, wallpaper torn and bedspreads faded, but also appeared clean.
"It's not the Ritz, but it will do," Natasha teased, noticing her teammate carefully casing and judging the new surroundings.
Wanda did not care how fancy or scruffy the motel was. She just liked knowing where things were and what things were like. Despite the shabby tiny room, this place did not make her feel closed in at all. "Can I...help with anything?"
"I want you to sleep. You told me you couldn't walk here from the car without even being asked directly, so you must be feeling worse than I thought. Rest and I'll get our things."
"That man is still outside," Wanda said quietly. She knew quite well that Nat could more than easily take care of herself, but confronting him also made it more likely to be recognized, too. He's walking back and forth out there waiting for Nat to come out. Realizing just how easy it would be to just dip into this man's head, and force him to go away and forget he had seen 'Ana' at all made Wanda feel guilty. But she had promised not to use any mind tricks, and she'd done that enough during the failed Raft escape attempt and the successful one. If Natasha carried her back outside, she could wreck that bad man's mind to shreds in two seconds if she wanted to, and he would not be able to express that she had done it to him, either.
Natasha sighed; she could hear the footsteps herself and she knew that Wanda probably was not, in fact, anxious over nothing. The man probably assumed one or both of them would emerge from the room shortly to retrieve a bag or suitcase. "Then I'll wait a few minutes. Maybe he'll get bored and move on. I still want you to sleep, though."
Wanda continued staring up at the peeling plaster on the ceiling, her fingers twitching nervously. Maybe this was why people like Ross hated her, because her darker impulses were things she could follow through on so easily. Things that would be easy even now when she was injured, in pain, exhausted, and her magic still wasn't functioning normally yet. That nasty man outside technically hadn't even done anything to either of them. He just wanted to, and she had been thinking she could literally rip his mind apart. She rolled over onto her side and scrunched herself into a ball, ignoring that doing this made her arm and ribs hurt more. It should hurt, I am being awful, this is me being a terrible person, not destructive ideas Hydra put in my head or something. It's me. It's all me.
...If I was going to fold and dip into whatever mental abilities I have anyway, I should have done it to Rumlow before he could even set that bomb off. Those poor people in Lagos wouldn't be dead, then. She felt something gently but firmly pulling her into a sitting position. S-H-O-U-L-D-V-E L-E-F-T M-E I-N R-A-F-T, she signed shakily, blinking back tears.
"What? Wanda, what the hell are you saying that for?" Natasha had just been wanting to stop an upset Wanda from lying on her injured arm, but now she was all the more concerned. Clearly something was bothering her much more than just worrying some random person outside might mean them harm. This in particular wasn't something Wanda had expressed even once over the past week.
"I could rip that man's mind apart. Even now."
"So what? I don't see you doing so."
"I was thinking that I could. I could...should've wrecked Rumlow. That way. Lagos."
Oh. "You do realize that interfering by wrecking his mind would not have saved those victims. The bomb had already been activated," Natasha told her quietly. "You also were ordered specifically not to use those mental aspects of your power, because all of us decided it was safer for you and everyone else if you didn't."
I know, I just...I think that there is something wrong with me. “I don't want them. I liked being connected t-to...Pietro, but...he is not...here any more," Wanda mumbled after a moment, her accent thicker than normal, "and those enhancements are no...good...otherwise. It is like..." She searched for words, not sure how to explain herself, in English or otherwise. That she did not think she was deserving or capable of handling that power properly. That being ordered not to use it felt like confirmation that it was something bad, and that felt like she was being excluded and stifled too, even though she didn't even want to access that portion of her enhancements, because she didn't trust herself. That realizing she didn't care if horrible people like Ross or Rumlow lived or died felt like she must be a bad person too. "I cannot...explain correctly. I think I'm disappointing him, you...everyone."
"Nobody is disappointed in you, we just-"
"I have heard Clint, okay?" Wanda interrupted, her voice edged with frustration now. "He isn't mad at me. I know that. But it's like..." She hesitated, squeezing her good hand into a fist. "He acts like that...that place broke me. And that feels...срање." Shit. That's what it feels like.
"He just hates that you were being hurt and he had to watch while being unable to do a thing about it. So now he feels guilty that you're still feeling crappy now. He does not think that." Nat turned toward the door; they could hear shouting voices outside, something about a purchase being a ripoff, and then footsteps stomping off.
"Someone chased him away," Wanda said matter-of-factly.
"Drug dealers." Nat decided to take the moment to retrieve their things from the car since now the man was gone anyway. "You wait here."
"Okay." Wanda realized she really did not mind waiting in the little motel room, because the lamp was on and it did not feel claustrophobic to her. She was far more concerned with Natasha going outside alone, in case that man came back.
But she returned within a minute or two with no incident. "I can't make Laura's good homemade soft dishes or smoothies, especially not here, but we do have some pudding and applesauce cups and instant oatmeal packets. Do you want those, or try something else?"
Wanda didn't answer immediately, because at this point she genuinely did want something else besides the soft and liquid foods she had been eating since the rescue, which all stayed down just fine. The throwing up episode previously had not had anything to do with food anyway, but it kind of scared her, even though she knew that had been her own anxiety making her stomach upset, not any actual food. If she ate something else and then it did make her sick, she wouldn't be able to talk for hours again because it would hurt her throat and ribs yet again. "I don't know," she said finally.
Natasha sighed, digging through their supplies. "Why don't you try a nutri-grain bar? Eat that and see how it goes, and if it goes down okay, you can have more. Then I want you to sleep for a bit before we do anything with your hair. Was there a certain color you already had in mind?"
This was something Wanda could answer easily. She liked her dark hair, but the idea of dyeing it seemed fun. Mostly she hadn't ever tried because Pietro had wrecked his hair bleaching it and ended up looking ridiculous until they'd been able to fix it. Privately she had thought he still looked silly even after they had stolen more supplies to 'fix' it, but he had been pleased with the results, anyway. But Natasha had dyed her hair herself, and she looked nice. "Red," Wanda stated emphatically, quite confident about that. Nat's hair used to be red, and it seemed very, very satisfying to make her hair red to help disguise her appearance when her magic produced red psionic energy and that was what she was supposed to hide.
Natasha was glad that this thought seemed to be something that brought a bit of spark to Wanda's tired green eyes. She appeared more than a little pleased with herself. "Red it is."
Notes:
Welp. Obviously the week of peace and quiet wasn’t going to last forever, but they’ll be able to return soon assuming everything goes as planned...
The song Wanda chooses in the car is I Lost Myself by ReVamp, which I felt suited her and would probably be something she likes listening to and connected with easily. Soooo yeah. I will not make it a habit of randomly including song lyrics obviously, but felt like they fit here.:)
Haven’t seen much of Tony, but we’ll see a little bit of what he’s doing next chapter!
Chapter 11: Chapter 11
Summary:
In which Wanda and Nat hang out in their motel room and Wanda tells Nat about something that has been really bothering her. Tony deals with Ross, and tries to come up with a new plan with Vision. Nat finally discusses the existence of the prison footage with Wanda, and they begin deciding what to do next.
Notes:
angsty healing friendship fluff, activate. it’s my favorite xD
Okay, jokes aside, I really hope Tony comes off properly in his couple scenes in this chapter. I want his snarky/arrogant vibe to come through while still showing that he, you know, does in fact care about the others. I would greatly appreciate feedback on him (regardless of whether you love or hate him in canon, idc!) since he’s not easy for me to write haha.
Idk if this really needs a TW, but Wanda does describe torture things that happened to her on the Raft to Nat, and she is triggered by something else seemingly small later in the chapter, so...yeah. Just mentioning just in case:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“I think it came out quite nicely, if I do say so myself," Natasha said, once they had successfully finished Wanda's hair several hours later, after they had eaten and slept for awhile. "Red hair suits you. Do you want to see?"
"No, I trust you. I am sure it looks much, much better than...than when Pietro and I bleached his hair. He looked ridiculous." Wanda sounded genuinely happy thinking about that memory, and she twisted a bit of her own newly red locks in her fingers. From what she could see without a mirror, the color was a bit different than she'd been picturing originally, but she liked it anyway. She had no wish to look in a mirror right now; she knew the rest of her was still a mess and didn't particularly want to look at it if she didn't have to. "I wouldn't let him touch mine, after that." He would probably call me 'carrots' and pretend to be offended I let Nat mess with my hair and not him. And I'd probably snap at him a bit for it and then apologize five minutes later. Wanda merely nodded when Natasha asked if she wanted to go back to bed, and didn't protest when her friend carried her back. She was sure she could walk that little bit from the sink to her bed if she had help, but she still felt so tired anyway, so she stayed quiet about it. "I still feel like half of me is...missing."
"I think that is normal. You two were practically joined at the hip. I could see that and I never even really got to know Pietro." Natasha was deeply surprised Wanda was willingly talking about her twin all of a sudden, but she seemed content to do so at the moment, smiling although her eyes had tears shining in them again.
"I just miss him. I still really, really miss him. Even his dumb teasing." Wanda hesitated but then added in a very different tone of voice, clearly disillusioned and somewhat surprised, "Nat, that prison was worse than Hydra."
"Because Pietro wasn't there with you?" Natasha asked slowly.
Wanda shook her head slightly and turned away onto her side, this time making sure not to lie on her injured arm. Not exactly. “For me, yes, but..." she searched for the correct explanation, not wanting to sound like she thought that terrorist organization was good, because it certainly was not. But it just seemed disturbing and wrong to her that a first-world country's government-sanctioned max security prison was worse than being experimented on by terrorists. Sure, she and Pietro had volunteered to be there, but neither of them had any idea whatsoever what they were getting into, either. And once you were there, you could not just back out and leave. You had seen too much. You cooperated or you got executed, and while the twins had survived the experiments, all of the other volunteers had not been so lucky. "There was not a...a thing to...sensory deprive you there, anyway," she said awkwardly. She blinked, squeezing a handful of the faded bedspread in her fist. I'm not there. Nat isn't even going to make me talk if I don't want to. I brought it up, not her. If I want to be quiet, I can, Wanda reminded herself. "I don't know. I just. I think it..." she felt her voice shaking to the point she did not feel comfortable trying to explain further, so she turned over on her back again so she could sign instead. K-I-N-D-E-R T-O K-I-L-L. W-O-R-S-E T-H-A-N E-L-S-E.
Natasha frowned. Usually Wanda seemed to actually take the time to sign enough words that her point was clear, but she had left so much out this time it took a moment to understand what she meant, between that and the awkward verbal description she had made. "You were put into some sort of sensory deprivation on the Raft, and it was worse to you than anything else that happened, either there or while you were with Hydra?"
Relieved that her point had gotten across successfully at least, Wanda nodded. "Much, much worse." Wanda's hand shook badly, but she did sign the details she could remember. The freezing table. The rough straps holding her down so she couldn't move at all. The pitch black darkness and the complete lack of sound. The disorientation that felt heightened by whatever drugs they had injected her with. It took awhile, and she could feel her own heartbeat speeding up as she tried to explain herself, but this felt like it needed to be said somehow. Wanda realized she genuinely just wanted to get it off her chest. It was nice to let someone else know what had happened, someone who wouldn't fuss but would understand. She could not tell Clint about this, because he would feel even more guilty and upset that he hadn't been able to protect her, and while the rest of the team wasn't around for now anyway, there was absolutely no way she would ever share those little details with any of them. "I, um...I was able to...talk to Clint. In m-my head. It...helped some."
"Do you know how long you were left like that?" Natasha asked gently, suspicious she already knew by inferring such from the camera footage.
"I don't know exactly. I just...know I tried to escape day 6. I failed, there was...long...hurting me...can't remember..." she closed her eyes, trying to both think and not freak herself out. I am not there. I never could remember everything. "I don't even know if I ever...passed out completely. I can't remember details, just...a lot of yelling a-and...pain. Someone was angry I...k-kept trying to...protect my arm. It went on a long time. At some point they...threw me on...that table, left me strapped there, and...Clint said it was still sixth day, bedtime, later." A-F-T-E-R T-R-I-E-D T-A-L-K T-O H-I-M F-O-R W-H-I-L-E. "They put me back day 8, morning." That much she did remember, because she could remember him saying 'day 8, morning' more than once. Wanda watched Nat curiously; she had been wondering if she had just been weirdly sensitive to that particular incident, because it wasn't like anyone was in that room continuing to physically hurt her the entire time or something, but seeing Natasha look genuinely horrified as she sat next to her seemed to imply otherwise.
"I think you quite literally saved yourself by talking to him, because it helped protect your mind from being affected as much by it. That's...yeah. You're not being sensitive. Thank you for trusting me enough to share." That is why she looked so disoriented and...off, on top of all her injuries, when I saw the day 8 footage. This.
"Please don't...tell the others. Especially not Clint."
Natasha frowned. "I think he already knows what they did to you during that incident, more or less."
"He doesn't know what it...did to me," Wanda whispered. "I pretended I didn't care. I even...taunted Ross about it." And it scared me. That really, really disturbed me and I don't know why. "He did not...do it again, either. Just the once."
"Well, you did that so that he would be less likely to do it to you again, I'm sure. Not much use as a torture if the victim remains entirely unbothered, is it. You confused him enough that you prevented a second occurrence." Natasha paused, looked down at her own hands, and then back at Wanda. "Look, I won't tell anyone if you don't want me to. We...trained in a sort of sensory deprivation chamber in the Red Room, 'to strengthen our minds and be prepared'. It's not something to mess around with. Some girls lost their heads entirely. You'd hallucinate after only a few hours. You could scream and scream and nobody was coming. You couldn't hear yourself. The limit was six hours for us, if that gives you an idea. Even there, where girls are a dime a dozen and worth little. So I know what that can do to somebody. Obviously none of us there had your enhancements though, so we couldn't cope with it in the same way you chose to." She shook her head and added, "I was not just trying to make you feel better by saying your enhancements protected you. I mean that quite literally. No wonder your weird magic is still behaving strangely now. It's probably still stressed out from that, from protecting your head. It sounds like you were trapped like that for a good 36 hours or so, on top of everything done to you in the morning during the failed escape attempt, which was bad enough that you can’t even remember all of it. 36 hours is way, way too long, especially considering you were injured, and there were no breaks or food or water."
I suppose that makes sense. Whatever Wanda had expected Natasha to say, it wasn't that. She'd rather just expected a 'sorry that happened to you, that really sucks' and nothing more, nothing less. "Thank you for...listening...understanding. And, um...f-for trusting me." Wanda closed her eyes again, trying and failing to prevent tears from falling. She told me that about something that happened to her before, because she knew it would help, and she didn't have to do that.
"I told you I'd listen whenever you were ready to talk, back on the quinjet," Natasha informed her.
"I know," Wanda said quietly, "but you didn't have to...share your bad experiences t-to...listen to me."
"Maybe not, but it helped, didn't it? I don't exactly freely share what the Red Room was like. You've...seen bits and pieces of it, I know. I used to mind, but frankly once you joined the team and I got to know you, it was different." Natasha went to lie down on her own bed since Wanda didn't seem so upset anymore and was just glad someone was listening to her. "You're the only other female on the team, and you remind me of myself and someone else I care about very much."
This comment reminded Wanda of the 'family reunion' comment Natasha had made before. "The family you mentioned before?" she asked curiously.
"I have a little sister. Not by blood, she was just another child trafficked into the Red Room, same as I was. But we lived in Ohio for three years as kids, undercover as a normal American family with Melina, an older Widow, and Alexei, who was...friends of a sort with the head of the Red Room. It was honestly the best years I had as a child. Yelena was so little then she didn't even know it wasn't real. Once that mission ended, I...lost her and we were separated." Nat paused and went on, "Yelena reminds me of you. Long story short, all of us reunited and freed the last of the Widows. Red Room is truly gone now."
Wanda smiled at this. That was something very, very worth having to wait three weeks for help to arrive on the Raft. She knew that whatever details had happened with Natasha's family of sorts had very little to do with the amount of time the rescue had taken, but that was worth waiting for to her. "I'm glad you found her. Did you...like seeing Melina and Alexei?" They basically trafficked little kids. If Melina was another Widow, she was a victim too, but that doesn't explain this Alexei man's behavior.
"Mixed, I suppose. They participated in trafficking us as kids, obviously, but...still. I believe they genuinely cared about Yelena and me, just not enough. I don't know. If we can do so safely, I'd like you to meet Yelena. She would like you." Natasha sighed, staring up at the peeling ceiling plaster. This was much sooner than she had planned to tell Wanda about Yelena, but Wanda had asked about the family reunion bit, and Nat figured it would be better to just explain now than to be cagey about it. "She knows we successfully got you four out of that prison and I know she wants me to come back and help try to track down all of the liberated Widows' families, but dragging her in with us would turn her into a fugitive on the run too, and potentially the rest of the girls rescued from the Red Room too."
"She would want you back anyway," Wanda said quietly. I would not care one bit if I was putting myself in danger so I could see Pietro again. “You should go see her. You could easily do that if you drop me somewhere." There was no doubt in Wanda's mind that Natasha could easily visit her sister without being caught...if she was alone.
"I will not leave you anywhere on your own unless I know you're safe. Yelena is safe right now on her own. She's working with Melina and Alexei to help the girls we freed. You, on the other hand, will not be safe right now if I leave you on your own."
"Then I will have to get stronger fast." If I can't have my sibling back, I want to at least...not be preventing Nat from being with hers.
_______________
Wanda woke up in the morning to Natasha gently shaking her shoulder. Though they had decided to do the hair dyeing and just talked for awhile in what was pretty much the middle of the night, she did not really feel much more tired than she did normally, either. She blinked sleepily, reorienting herself to current setting: shabby but pleasant and warm cheap hotel room, on the run with Natasha. No cold cell, nothing restraining her again, no shock collar constantly paining her.
Wanda was very tired of having to consciously remind herself she was safe every time she woke up.
"Do you think you'd be all right while I grab us some breakfast from the hotel lobby? If not, we do have food to eat in here already, but if possible, I'd like us to take advantage of the free continental breakfast so that our supplies will last longer, just in case we can't go back to the vacation house as planned," Nat said now.
Wanda wondered again why these hotel breakfasts were called continental breakfasts, but she did not say this. Feeling a bit more sure of herself than she had the day before with the car ride and everything else, she told Natasha she did not mind being on her own for a few minutes. Maybe it was the new hair.
Natasha was a little surprised Wanda seemed to be fine with the idea, but very glad, too. "I'll be right back with something for us, then. Here's your phone. You have any issues, anything at all, you text or call my current burner phone. It doesn't have to be an emergency. Don't try to follow me. I'll leave your bags right here on your bed easy to reach."
"Okay." Unlike the day before when Natasha went into the gas station and booked the motel room, Wanda did not feel like she was forcing herself to hold it together this time. I would still have trouble if I had to wait alone in the car, but in here is fine. The lights are on and I don't feel...closed in, either.
"All right then."
The second Natasha was gone, Wanda instinctively dug around in the duffel Sam had packed for her in search of that small gun. I'm not supposed to use any magic and I would scare myself if I tried using that taser right now. She checked to make sure it was loaded and the safety was on before shoving it into her hoodie pocket. This was better; most likely no one was going to come bother her while Natasha was gone for ten minutes or something, but knowing she was not unarmed even without accessing her own powers was helpful. Wanda was not sure how good her aim would be without the use of one hand anyway, even without the problem that she was still shaky, but it would be better than nothing.
Wanda waited a couple minutes and then decided she did, in fact, want to see her hair in the mirror. The short distance to the mirror over the sink didn't look too daunting. She could probably handle that; she would just keep her hand on the wall to balance herself. I should wait until Nat comes back. If I did fall, I would probably scare myself again like I did at the vacation house. She would let me try on my own if I said I wanted to. And my ankle still hurts.
Instead of doing that, Wanda looked in the backpack Vision had brought her. In the largest outside pocket, she found a very, very fat large yellow envelope. Where did all of this money come from? I never had this much in my life. She'd been getting a small stipend while staying at the Compound training and working over the last year, and rarely spent much of even that, considering everything she might need was available at the Compound, but this was...a lot. This was certainly not her own savings she had been keeping hidden in her room back there. The outside of the envelope simply said, 'keep it, no strings attached' and nothing else.
Wanda frowned and shoved the envelope back into the backpack out of sight. Did Vis know Tony Stark put that in there? There's no one else that would put literal thousands of dollars in there and stuff it in an envelope with a note like that. She had not even tried counting it yet, but the glance inside looked like it was stuffed ridiculously full of US hundred dollar bills. If there was anywhere near as much in there as it looked, she could stretch that to last for a long, long time, even if she split it up for all of the rogue Avengers.
She thought she would much rather have the team back together again than a pile of what was certainly guilt money.
Wanda was still staring at the backpack a few minutes later when she heard a knock on the door. She slipped her good hand into her hoodie pocket for the gun, but it was only Natasha returning with the breakfast, so she withdrew her hand and relaxed. "There is an envelope full of money in there," Wanda said, pointing at her backpack.
"What?"
"I had about three thousand saved back...at the Compound. So...I thought maybe Vis just...brought me that, since he knew where I...hid it. In my room. This is n-not mine." Wanda reached in and fished the envelope back out, dropping it on the bed. I don't know what to think. I should be grateful, but I'm...annoyed and a bit confused.
Natasha glanced at the envelope and was clearly trying to hold back laughter. "I'd say you just got a Stark-sealed apology," she said matter-of-factly. "That's certainly Tony's handwriting. Did you count that?"
Wanda shook her head, her expression still startled and mildly irritated. "I don't want it. I'd rather have a...a real apology a-and explanation," she said quietly. And I want to know if Vis knew about this and didn't tell me."And have the team back together."
"...Why is your gun in your pocket?" Nat asked now, looking closely at her younger teammate. "Was there an issue?"
"No, I just...felt safer." Wanda blinked slowly and put the gun back in the duffel. I don't need that now. Nat is back and there is nothing wrong right now. She dumped the contents of that envelope out on the bed and just stared at it. While she knew however much this was genuinely wasn't a whole lot to Tony the billionaire, it seemed like a ton to her.
"Girl, you have at least 100k there. Nice."
Wanda began separating the piles with Nat; once they were finished, they were at $150,000. Wanda continued staring at it in distaste, feeling stupid and guilty for doing so. They did need money and now they had some. A lot of it. "Can we...divide it and s-send some to...the rest of the team?" Wanda asked finally.
Natasha hesitated and helped her put all of the bills away again. "I think this is meant for you, Wanda. Logically there is nothing any of us can do to help you cut a deal, whether we signed or not. Money goes fast when you're on the run. Even if you stayed in worse places than this motel-let's round down and say, fifty per night-you're already at 350 for a week, 1400 for a month. That's not counting food, clothes, emergency supplies of any kind, or anything else."
"I don't think Pietro and I had the equivalent of even five percent of that...all of the time we were on our own...and Tony just stuffed that in an envelope." Wanda sounded baffled and frustrated, not quite sure what she should think.
"Wanda, you and Pietro were starving in the streets. Just because we're on the run now doesn't mean you have to have...nothing. Keep it."
"Did he give you any before you a-and Steve got us out?" Wanda asked.
"Well, no, but-"
"Then he just feels guilty," Wanda replied, a slight edge in her voice. She hesitated and then asked, "Do you think it...would be okay to text Vision?" I see his new number in my contacts now. I want to ask if he knew. I hope he didn't know, because if he did, he did not tell me.
"That is risky. I'm not sure texting him is a good idea, in case someone back at the Compound gets ahold of his phone. Better save that until you can see him in person again and make sure he understands that phone cannot get into someone else's hands containing messages from you in it, regardless of what he is told or ordered to do," Natasha said firmly. "Let's eat breakfast. Deciding what you want to do with that money can wait."
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AVENGERS COMPOUND
"Told you only Laura and the three Barton kids were at my vacation house. What a waste of time yesterday. We all found nothing, as I told you. You done here, Secretary Ross?" Tony said calmly. "I do have other things to do."
"For now. You need to get your robot in line, Stark. It seems...distracted," Ross said, "and the Vision is our best hope at locating the fugitives, particularly the Maximoff girl. Sorry for the intrusion at the house."
"Understood. It'll be taken care of. I want to find them as much as you do," Tony lied smoothly.
"What tech could they possibly have access to on the run that you haven't found any of them yet?"
"Uh, you do realize they have a quinjet that can't be tracked while in stealth mode and someone in the group that can mind-control people. Not my fault."
"You must have a way to contact them, at least, or you wouldn't continue working on deals for the non-enhanced fugitives."
"Still don't know their location...or locations, if they have split up."
"Then tell them you've done so and convince them to meet somewhere."
"They'll want proof it's not a trap," Tony pointed out.
"Be convincing, then."
"Say I convince them. You going to torture them again? I saw Wanda when I visited the Raft. Whatever was going on was not just containing her, like I told you before. I know what I designed, and you did not need anything else besides the collar to keep her from using her powers."
"Clearly not. She tried to escape, and she continued disturbing the guards constantly."
Drat that stubborn girl. Tony scowled, thinking that Wanda made it very, very difficult to defend her. Every time he had brought this up, Ross started talking about the escape attempt, and then after the successful rescue from the Raft, Ross brought up Wanda mind-controlling a guard into helping the rogues. "You know darn well whatever she did was because your men were torturing her," Tony pointed out flatly. And she lashes out at people that have hurt her. I should know. Though the idea that Wanda had mind-controlled someone made him shudder, some sick thing slithering in his stomach, he did not feel at all sorry for the girl's victim(s), either.
"There is no torture sanctioned on the Raft."
"Then it's happening unsanctioned and you, being in charge, should put a stop to it. She's a WMD, sure, but she's also a human being. The Raft was supposed to be containing her, not using her as torture bait to make her team talk."
"You saw all of them for yourself when you visited. They were perfectly fine and uninjured."
Tony raised one eyebrow. "The rest of them, yeah. The little witch, no. What I saw on her was not just some scrapes or whatever from Leipzig. You had her tied up like she's some wild animal."
"You sound a little too invested. Maybe you are working with the fugitives."
Tony looked Ross straight in the eyes. "Just because I don't support torturing the ex-teammates I'm pissed with does not mean I'm working with them." This was, of course, a lie, but the secretary seemed to buy it, thank goodness. "And I don't have to like or trust that Sokovian girl to tell you she was being treated like shit."
"You just work on finding them."
____________________
"Mr. Stark, you cannot let the secretary have them," Vision said, phasing into the room once Ross had left the Compound a few minutes later. "Secretary Ross is not a good man and he does not deserve the authority he has."
"Gee. Thanks for stating the obvious. Good thing you ran off yesterday," Tony deadpanned. "I knew you'd warn the ones stashed at the house. How's your girl doing?"
Vision slowly blinked synthetic blue eyes at him. "If you mean Wanda, she is not mine. She is her own person."
"Your girlfriend, then."
"I do not know if she cares for me in that way. However, she is my friend, and she is a girl."
Tony looked bemused. "Whatever you say, Casanova Toaster. Well, did she want to see you? Let you tell her my message?" he asked. "You didn't say much yesterday when you returned. She and the others fine?"
"She seemed happy I came, but she did not wish to hear any message. She said she was sorry, but she was not ready yet, and I could tell you that if I wished. Mr. Barton appeared tired and somewhat angry, but he is fine. Ms. Romanoff is fine also." Vision stopped there and did not say any more.
This was unsurprising to Tony; he sighed. "Okay, and Wanda? What about that stubborn enhanced girl?"
Vision recognized himself as being angry now, his hands clenched into red fists. "That man we are trying to appease now was torturing Wanda repeatedly. She is badly injured. I should not have allowed her to be captured."
"Vision, I told you before, if you had interfered in that airport, you would've instantly been branded a criminal too, right along with the rest, especially if you stole away with Wanda. You know she and the Winter Soldier are the ones Ross is after the most." Tony did not particularly care if Bucky was caught at all, not after Siberia, but he also did not want to send either Wanda or him to the Raft either. And that was exactly where both of them would go, too, being mentally unstable enhanced individuals both considered international fugitives.
"That would be preferable to what occurred, especially if she was going to be treated so poorly there. We have not been able to alter anything whatsoever regarding the Accords so far, because if we do, then we will be cast under suspicion as well. Letting Wanda be captured was not worth it at all. Now she is hurt, and I have repaired nothing, not for her or anyone else. First I harmed Mr. Rhodes in the airport and then I did not prevent Wanda from being harmed in the Raft. I am failing in my purpose to protect humans."
Tony rather thought the Vision was becoming more humanlike than anything else. It was also more than a little entertaining when the synthezoid proceeded to refer to everyone quite formally and then refer to Wanda by her first name, but also act like he did not think she cared about him. Vision was clearly enamored with her, and it was not just the curious fascination the synthezoid showed about most human-related things, either. Tony was mulling over the next course of action to take now, because if he didn't provide some sort of solid information soon, Ross would no longer trust him at all-he was already suspicious-and they wouldn't be able to accomplish anything whatsoever, let alone do anything to protect the rest of the broken team he was still frustrated with. He needed to continue maintaining that man's trust, at least somewhat, or his unique position right now would be ruined and he would be closely monitored himself. That would be selfishly frustrating, and make it nigh impossible to continue secretly assisting the rogues in staying hidden from behind the scenes. "Do you know where they all are now?"
"No. You know I could easily locate Wanda if I wish, but unless all of the others are with her, I would not know regardless. I am not turning her in, Mr. Stark. I am sorry," Vision said firmly.
"No, no...it's just, if she trusts you, perhaps we could technically 'allow' them to be found and set up the trap Ross wants. He can't blame us if they conveniently escape again." Tony began pacing, eyeing the synthezoid.
"Why would any of them show up if I have warned them ahead of time? There is nothing in that for anyone."
"Because one, they know if I'm caught helping them, they lose a valuable source of supplies and information. Letting them know ahead of time would mean they'd be prepared for a staged incident. Two, I'll bet I can finally get agreements for Wilson, Barton, and Lang through easily if Ross thinks he's going to get Wanda back, or apprehend the Winter Soldier in the first place. Latter isn't happening, clearly, but you can find her. He's not the only one with power to push any agreements through."
Vision blinked slowly, looking displeased. "I will not let anyone have her, let alone Secretary Ross. You did not see her at the vacation house, and you do not know all of what was happening to her in that prison."
Tony decided this must mean Wanda did indeed trust Vision, if she had been willing to tell him whatever had happened to her. "I think I saw enough when I visited the Raft. I don't mean you bring her in for real, I mean we stage a scuffle on purpose," he corrected. "If I provide accurate information of a location to that man at least once, he'll leave me be, at least for awhile. Video call her, will you? See if she picks up."
"A video call may cause her distress, especially about this. That is not conducive for healing. She would not be able to do this any time soon, regardless, even if she wished to. Wanda can barely stand without assistance at the moment." Vision rather did want to see if she would pick up, but he also knew Wanda would be upset, if not angry, if she did pick up and then she saw him with Tony. She might actually hang up on him, and he would certainly lose any trust she still had in him.
"Text and ask if she's willing to video call, then."
This seemed like a reasonable compromise. "Very well. But if she does not answer or says no, that is it. I will not press further."
__________________
Back in their little motel room, Wanda had found a channel on the room's TV playing reruns of episodes from The Dick Van Dyke Show, which made her very happy. Nat informed her she did not care what Wanda put on the television as long as it wasn't the news, so Wanda remained resting in bed watching the show, absently moving cereal pieces one by one from one side of a paper plate to the other in an effort to improve her own shaky fine motor skills at the moment. Natasha had briefly asked what she was doing, since she'd admitted she couldn't eat the crunchy cereal yet, but upon hearing Wanda's reasoning, Nat gave her an approving look and said that was a great idea. Doing this wasn't strenuous and could only be helpful. Wanda was mostly just glad to feel like she was actively doing something to help herself improve a bit even as she lay resting in bed watching TV.
Natasha lounged on her own bed checking something on her laptop Wanda sensed that her friend did not wish to share with her, and while she was curious, she did not ask, either. A sudden quiet beep made her tense and her hand flew to her neck, bracing for another shock to assault her, but nothing was happening, and there had definitely been that noise, and that noise always meant sizzling pain would follow. A wisp of scarlet swirled around her fingers defensively, ready to defend its injured owner if necessary.
"Wanda, hey, I think that noise was your phone," Natasha told her quickly. She rolled off her own bed and went to sit next to Wanda instead, pulling her hand away from her neck by the wrist and moving the plate of cereal to the nightstand. "Don't claw at those bandages. You'll make the burns worse."
The scarlet wisps remained visible, but didn't actually do anything beyond growing a bit larger in size as Wanda tried to yank her wrist free.
"I'll let go if you're not going to rip at your neck. You're safe. We're in that cheap motel, remember? Nobody is going to hurt you." Natasha was mostly concerned with simply helping Wanda, but also...if her magic reacted in any larger way because she was panicking, she would give both of them away immediately. This was not the vacation house, where there was plenty of open space to allow for a little more leeway on power mishaps. Here there was the little motel room and nothing more. If Wanda did reveal the two of them, they would need to bolt quickly, and Natasha had no idea how they'd be able to do that with Wanda's current condition, especially if she was panicking. I need to calm her down, and fast.
The lights flickered. Natasha remembered hearing staff back on the Raft freaking out, thinking Wanda had been the source of the alarm blaring and lights blinking. Well, she had not been doing that there, but she was certainly doing it now without even knowing it.
"Wanda, tell me where you are right now. Breathe, okay? We're safe." For now. “Tell me what's happening."
"I...I'm scared." The lights ceased blinking-thank goodness-and the little red wisps had vanished, but Wanda was still trying to yank her wrist free, feeling more and more weak and useless that she couldn't do so. She was aware enough to know that she did not want to use magic on Natasha to make her let go, but then she was stuck trying to pull away without doing that, and she was not strong enough. I wouldn't be strong enough anyway. I am being stupid. Wanda stopped struggling entirely and just squeezed her eyes shut, also knowing she did not need to make the death glare face at a friend. Nat would probably just raise an eyebrow at her and say that was not going to work on her, anyway. It would have worked last year, Wanda thought guiltily, but once the older Avenger had gotten to know her, this defense mechanism simply no longer worked on Natasha at all.
"That's fine, that's okay. We're just in that little motel. You were watching TV, your phone beeped. If I let go, can you leave your neck alone?" Natasha was fairly certain it was safe to release Wanda's wrist finally, but she did not want to risk her grabbing at those burns, either. "Breathe. Just breathe. You're okay."
Wanda nodded a bit, and then immediately scooted away, hunching her shoulders to her ears, ignoring that doing this made the burns on her neck hurt more. The TV continued running in the background, and she could hear Rob and Laura Petrie talking. It was not the walnut episode, stuck glitching as she and Pietro hid under the bed as children, waiting for that bomb to go off. Season 2, episode 21.
What would Mama and Papa think of me now? I lost him too. I lost Pietro. “Turn the TV off, please turn it off," she whispered. "It's not the same a-and usually it helps, but I d-don't know. Need it off."
Natasha frowned but did so, relieved that Wanda was at least communicating what she needed even if she was clearly not fine.
A second beep indicating another text had come through made Wanda cringe again, but this time she snatched at the stupid phone with a shaky hand and silenced it rather than grabbing at her neck again. Then she touched the bandages on her neck lightly, not yanking or picking at them, just touching. That collar is not there anymore. Stop it. I'm fine. Wanda finally looked up at Natasha after a minute, thinking she should probably explain this illogical, jumpy, panicked behavior. Much to her surprise, Nat didn't look confused at all; she was merely sitting there watching her, appearing as if she already knew. "The collar made a...similar noise, before it would...activate," Wanda whispered hesitantly. She did not share why one of her favorite shows had suddenly made her upset, because that was not something she knew how to articulate in the first place.
"I assumed," Natasha said with an edge in her voice. "You can just change the alert sound, and it won't happen again."
Or if I wasn't so...messed up, a phone noise would not bother me, Wanda thought, but she didn't say that. What if she was outside somewhere and someone else's phone made the same noise? Certainly having another of these episodes in public would draw all kinds of unwanted attention, even if her powers didn't react in any way. "Other people's phones w-will...make the...sound." Wanda gingerly lay down again, curled up on her side with her good hand over her ribs. I'm fine. I know where I am, and while I suppose we are not exactly safe, nobody is going to hurt me like that again. I can defend myself somewhat, and Nat is here. She would help me too if I felt like I couldn't do anything.
"They will," Nat agreed, "but now you know that sound triggers you right now, so you can put in your earbuds or something when outside unless you're sure you can handle hearing the noise. You cannot do that if you're alone because you need to be watchful and pay attention, but as long as you're with me or someone else on the team, you can."
"I want to be okay, so y-you can visit your real sister."
Natasha smiled at that comment and brushed a bit of hair out of Wanda's face. "Except, you don't have to 'be okay' for me to go visit Yelena. We just have to wait for you to physically heal enough so we can travel more easily, and we have to be careful planning such a thing so that if anything does go wrong, we can run and leave Yelena innocent and not implicated with us."
"She can just claim I mind-controlled her," Wanda pointed out, her voice neutral.
"Doing that makes you look worse to others, not better."
"It would protect her. I don't care." I do care, but if it kept her safer, then that is fine. Wanda jumped and dragged her sore body to a sitting position when they both heard a knock on the door. "What do I-"
"Lina, activate, that's all," Natasha whispered, glancing around the room to make sure nothing visible appeared suspicious. She closed her laptop quickly, made sure Wanda's duffel bag and backpack were zipped, and then went to peek out the door peephole. Okay, appears to be maintenance.
The knock came again. "Hey, sorry to bother you, but I'm here to check the lights after that brief power outage. It was kinda strange...only affected four rooms..." the man outside said. "This one, the two adjoining ones, and the one above."
"Oh, okay. They seem to be working fine now, I don't know what happened," Natasha said in her subtly higher-pitched Ana voice, and opened the door.
Wanda bit her lip, knowing that she had probably done that to the power herself during the whole freaking out about the stupid phone beeping thing. This is why I told Nat she should leave me. Now Natasha had to let this maintenance person in, because it would look incredibly suspicious if she refused, especially considering their room was the center of the incident. Wanda zipped her hoodie up the rest of the way, figuring that would hide at least some of the mess that was her neck at the moment. Her hand shook, and she wished it would stop. This was not only from her still being so much weaker than normal; she was also nervous and jumpy and it was infuriating. It doesn't matter. Maybe Lina would be scared after her "car accident". Lina has pretty red hair. She's not normal, broken me-she looks different and she is on vacation with her cousin even though she was hurt. So there.
She felt like the man's glance lingered on her just a fraction too long when he entered, but she didn't detect any ill will from him, either. This man certainly did not have the same malicious aura as the one that had wanted Natasha last night. The blurted, "Geez, what happened to you? Sorry, that's rude," confirmed this in her mind.
"It is fine. I had...a car accident," Wanda said in her Lina voice, which was not really all that much different from hers; it was just...more like she had sounded practicing speaking English as a child rather than now. She glanced at Nat, wondering if she should offer any further explanation, but the question really was rude and didn't need to be answered at all, and the man seemed to have already moved on, checking the lightbulb sockets. He only said 'that sucks' and dropped it.
Natasha smiled at her and nodded in approval. Later, they could work on simply disguising Wanda's accent entirely, but for now, this was fine.
In a few minutes, they were told nothing seemed to be amiss with the lights, as both Avengers had expected, and the man left, saying if they had any issues they should simply call the front desk. "Thanks! Have a nice day," "Ana" called out the door. Natasha sighed and leaned against it, looking over at Wanda. "We need to figure out something to help you control yourself even during one of those episodes," she said firmly. "I'm guessing you know already now, but you were messing with the lights before. Obviously this time it didn't matter, but..." Nat trailed off.
I know. "This is why I told you to leave me," Wanda answered, her green eyes sharp. "I can't control that. Didn't even know what...what I did until I...calmed down some." You could sedate me, restrain me again. That would work, she thought but didn't add.
"You also didn't use any of it on me, and I was the one hanging onto your wrist so you wouldn't tear up your neck any further. You even had a handful of energy in your hand. Back in the car last week, you shoved Clint away from you with it and you were in much worse condition then." Natasha returned to sit next to her and added, "I think it's good your magic seems to be recovering, but that also means you're going to have bigger reactions when you feel like that. I'm not leaving you behind. We just need to figure something out."
"This is why I couldn't have...normal prison conditions. Because there is...there's nothing to fix that unless..." L-I-K-E Y-O-U F-O-U-N-D M-E. Wanda's expression crumpled, and she curled up on her side again, facing away from Natasha, suddenly not wanting Nat to see her cry yet again. I am putting her in danger and I don't know how to stop that.
...I could eliminate the problem myself.
No, no, no, I can't do that. I won't. I won't. Wanda could sense Natasha's unease passively without poking at her friend's head one bit, and knowing that she was nervous made Wanda more nervous herself in a vicious sort of cycle. "I have made you nervous."
"Because I don't want us to get caught. It isn't you-"
"It is me and you know that."
"If you'd let me finish. It isn't you personally. If we weren't on the run, then you wouldn't be making me nervous."
"Lagos," Wanda muttered, thinking of those poor children in that photo again. Maybe I could give them some of that money Tony Stark sent once Nat finds them. They need help. “And the Accords. Things also...my fault." No, they aren't. They just feel like they are.
"Come on, you don't really believe that. I believe you that it feels like they are, but you know otherwise." Natasha gently patted Wanda's shoulder, and the younger girl flinched, obviously startled, but she did turn over again. "Whatever you were repeatedly told in that hellhole to try to make you believe the Accords or the Lagos incident to be your fault was concocted specifically to hurt you. I'm guessing some of it contained a thread of truth and you've latched onto that."
I already felt horribly guilty before I was ever taken to the Raft. Wanda didn't answer this; she knew, logically, that Natasha was right. Curious what these texts that she'd received earlier ever were, she opened her messages. "Vis texted me," she whispered. "Twice."
'Hello, I hope you are doing well and hidden away safe somewhere. Would it be acceptable to video call you? I do not wish to cause you stress, but I would like to see you, even if it is not safe to visit yet.'
Then, 'Mr. Stark also wishes to speak with you. It is not because he wants to turn you in. I believe his stress-inducing idea may allow Mr. Barton, Mr. Wilson, and Mr. Lang a deal. Would you allow him to be on the call?'
Wanda quite liked the idea of video calling Vision, but she still did not want to see Tony. Once she was finished reading, she showed the screen to Natasha, who simply told her she should decide. After a minute's thought, she simply texted back, 'Let me think about it. I like hearing from you.' "I sent this," Wanda murmured, and showed Nat her own message.
"Very reasonable. I will say don't let Tony on a video call only because of this plan Vision is saying Tony is claiming he has. You only talk to either of them if you want to," Natasha told her. She grabbed her laptop and asked if Wanda minded if she sat on the bed next to her. Wanda immediately shook her head and scooted herself over to make room. "There's some things I need to show you and ask you about. I was going to wait longer, but with this new development, I think you need to know now."
Wanda studied Natasha suspiciously. Whatever it was must be something Nat thought she wasn't ready to see or hear, because she was sure Natasha would have shared it already otherwise. This also meant it must be really, really horrible, because Black Widow never coddled her or left out things because it would hurt to hear them. She always told the truth but was willing to comfort her after if necessary. "Okay," Wanda said in her very best neutral voice. She also set her text alerts to vibrate only, not wanting to deal with finding a safe sound at the moment.
Natasha looked her right in the eyes. "This has to do with what happened on the Raft. I'm assuming you know I've been able to get word to Steve, Scott, and Sam about what the three of us that returned to the US have been up to," she began slowly. "We do have something that may help protect us-particularly the four of you that were imprisoned. However, releasing or sharing any of it would be sensitive to say the least."
"Security footage," Wanda said quietly, her fingers twitching anxiously, her eyes glued to Natasha's laptop. I am sure of it. What else could it possibly be?
"That's exactly it," Natasha said, relieved that Wanda seemed to have figured it out without even being told. "I couldn't get any from the interrogation room-there wasn't any-but we do have enough to prove what was happening in that place regardless. You are proof, too. Sam doesn't want a deal-he plans to stay with you, me, and Steve and do low profile missions together like before. However, Scott has been able to get in touch with the FBI and cut a house arrest deal...if he has proof of the inhumane prison conditions he claimed. Pictures or video, doesn't matter, but he needs something."
Cassie. He could go home to Cassie. Wanda blinked, wondering what this meant for her. "Are there...pictures of me from...the rescue?" she asked hesitantly, pulling her knees to her chest and not particularly caring that she was squishing her injured arm a bit. The idea disturbed her, that there might be photos of herself unconscious, something to catalog and prove the long list of injuries still littering her battered body. Stop it. Calm down. Nat is talking about it now because she did not want this to be done without me knowing about it.
Natasha frowned and shook her head hard. Of course not. None of us would do that to her. I understand why she asked though...she probably still thinks we all just want to use her. "Absolutely not. That's...invasive, you didn't give permission. I don't know if anyone on the Raft took pictures of you at any point while you were there, but I can promise no one on the team did. Taking some photos now would still be enough, especially combined with a security footage video. Scott already shared Sam's black eye as evidence, which is helpful, but..."
"But I am much better evidence," Wanda said flatly.
"Yes, you are. Forget Ross, many people would be a lot more disturbed by seeing a young light-skinned girl harmed, enhanced or not, than a black man, even if you and Sam had the exact same injuries, which you two do not. We might as well take advantage of people's sexism and racism if it will help us. Scott told the FBI you were being tortured and the other three of you had to watch repeatedly, but he didn't have any proof of it." Natasha still didn't open the laptop, but she did put an arm around Wanda's shoulders. Wanda appeared more thoughtful than upset, though she remained tense. Nat decided not to say more, not until Wanda gave some kind of further input.
I don't want photos of...any of this. I really don't. Wanda's hand flitted to her neck again, knowing that was probably the best evidence any of them could get ahold of right now. It was one thing to completely restrain the uncontrollable enhanced person, but nobody could justify all those burns from the shock collar. Well, Ross would, she thought darkly, but she did not really care what Ross's logic might be as long as he could not get her again. "We just dyed my hair," she murmured finally. "And I don't want to discount what happened to Sam, either."
"Sam flat out emailed me himself saying exactly what I just told you. We could avoid getting your hair in any photos, and I can also edit it back to brown again in pictures if need be. Frankly, regardless of that, the other thing to consider is that if we take photos and let the FBI have them, that's going to make it extremely difficult for us to hide until you heal. I'd like to hear what you think, and then I will tell you my thoughts."
Wanda hesitated, trying to think logically, not what might scare her or make her nervous the least. "The people that would be horrid to Sam...are the same ones who will like...pointing out I'm not a U.S. citizen." This was something Wanda was keenly aware of. She remembered last year there was a whole lot of discussion she did not quite understand, trying to change her official status from 'undocumented' and therefore technically present illegally, and just no one was doing anything about it because Avengers loopholes and nobody would question Captain America or Iron Man, and therefore ignore this. She did not know it at the time, but she was sure now that the ID, passport, and driver's license that had appeared in her room at the Compound after an anxiety-inducing trip to a New York DMV were not exactly...completely legitimate. I want Scott to be able to go home, though. I know he must miss Cassie. “I think Scott should use the footage, for sure. Maybe...maybe it would be...enough. Pictures or not."
"Then we're going to look at the clips I pulled that I think will be the most helpful, and you have to give the final okay on using them. What I'm thinking on the photos is that we take some, but don't share them right now. That way we do have the evidence for later, but it wouldn't affect staying hidden now, either." Nat noticed Wanda's eyes glowing red and added, "Your eyes are glowing again. If you need to do something with your magic, then that's fine, but make sure you are choosing to do it, and you need to keep it contained in this room."
Little bits of scarlet swirled around Wanda's good hand instead, but her eyes returned to their normal green. I am not there anymore. I know Nat is right and she's just trying to make sure I am okay with this, but I don't want to see any of that security footage. I lived it once, I don't want to go through it again. She wondered what had happened to the shock collar after Steve had ripped it off of her. Did they have that to use as evidence? Was it still in her cell back on the Raft? "...Can't...watch that, but...okay."
"Okay to what?"
"Let Scott use them," Wanda said in a small voice. C-L-I-N-T T-O-O. I am safe. I am just in a motel room, sitting with Nat, and we're talking. On impulse, she also asked via signing what had happened to that collar.
Where did that question come from? “I imagine some lab back on the Raft," Natasha said, gently tugging Wanda's hand away from her neck again. "The last I saw, that thing was ripped in half on the floor of the cell we found you in. I suppose we could've grabbed it for evidence purposes, but we didn't."
Wanda did not say anything, now wondering if Ross would try to make Tony repair the distasteful thing.
"I don't really want that footage of you used or shared anywhere without you knowing exactly what it is. Can you handle simply being told what the clips contain?" Nat suggested, opening the laptop. "You don't have to talk, just give me a thumbs up or thumbs down. Anything you don't want used, we won't."
This sounded acceptable; Wanda still didn't like the idea, but this she could put up with. "Can...can I have some Advil, please?" she asked, hoping that would help a little bit. She did not feel overwhelmingly terrible at the moment, but she still felt tired and in pain, and she was scared hearing Natasha talk about the stupid security footage clips might set her off further.
"Of course. There's a bottle of that right here in your duffel bag. You need any, it's there." Natasha went to get a cup of water and brought that back over to Wanda too. "I chose three things to start with. I figured Scott shouldn't share all of the evidence immediately, so that we can counter with plenty more if need be."
Wanda nodded, keeping her gaze down, but she stayed quiet. Okay. That makes sense. Part of her hated that Natasha, if not the others too, must have been going through all that footage since the rescue since there would be nineteen days' worth of it, but she could understand why. Even now she couldn't watch it herself, and someone had to go through it to find bits and pieces to use for things like this.
Wanda was oddly relieved Nat described the clips in a detached, clinical way, no emotion whatsoever, because it made it easier to hear. Day 1, being put in the cell roughly, compared with her lying on the floor in that cell on Day 19 just before the security cameras cut out for the rescue. She easily gave Natasha the okay for that.
"Honestly, if they just watch these back to back, it should be enough on its own," Natasha said now, "because nineteen days in prison shouldn't do this to anyone, which is exactly what I'm going to tell Scott to say."
"He should know too. He's been to jail," Wanda said, sounding mildly amused. "He even kept telling stories about it. Next one," she said firmly, wanting this to just be done.
"Okay."
Notes:
Evidently sensory deprivation is an extremely dangerous way to torture someone, which I kinda thought was the case already and confirmed while doing a bit of research for this story. Soooo yeah, if anyone out there is wondering why Natasha is so horrified about that in particular, that is why. Sticking somebody who’s NOT a telepath like Wanda in that situation would be even worse, since she’s able to kind of mess up the effects of it somewhat.
I don’t plan to focus on this a ton since I’d rather focus on the character interactions and family vibes as Wanda heals, but I really do wonder what the Avengers said to excuse/explain Wanda living in the US for the past year. She certainly doesn’t have any US citizenship and I HIGHLY doubt she had any kind of ID or passport even in Sokovia before. At best she’s a refugee seeking asylum, I think. Obviously it is not the same issues as what Sam deals with from racist people, but I felt like he would probably have a unique view/understanding of that sort of thing, which I kinda tried to express even back while the group was trapped on the Raft (he broke his silence to point out that Ross was being xenophobic). So yeah!
I fully acknowledge that being a white girl myself, I can’t really understand what all of that feels like, but I am doing my best to write the characters properly and mention any relevant issues for them in an understanding/tasteful manner, if that makes sense!:)
By the way, definitely not a mistake that Tony doesn't mention all of that money he stuck in Wanda's bag to Vision. Nat is right, he feels guilty and means that as an apology lol. Predictably Wanda is like "wtf" and very puzzled. XD
Any kudos/comments are very very much appreciated!
Chapter 12: Chapter 12
Summary:
In which Wanda and Nat get those photos done, but decide to keep them for now. Laura calls Nat with an update. They contact Tony, and Wanda gets some of her questions answered.
Notes:
I probably would have shared this chapter sooner, but writing Tony gives me trouble lol, and he is in a good portion of this chapter. Considering Wanda does not exactly have fond feelings toward him, I reaaalllyyy wanted to be careful not to bash the poor dude as he and Wanda snip at each other a bit before having a reasonable conversation lol. Anyways. Would love feedback on “my” Tony since he is by far the most difficult for me to write.
Not a TW per se, but a previous incident that happened to Wanda while she was with Hydra is described briefly due to taking the evidence photos now reminding both Natasha and her of it.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"You're sure you're good with any of these getting shared?" Natasha asked one last time after going through the other clips. "We don't have any way of controlling if someone leaks any of it once Scott gets them to the FBI."
"I know." Wanda loathed the idea of those things potentially ending up on public display for anyone to see, but it would be selfish not to use solid evidence they had access to. If it helps Scott and Clint get home, it's worth it. She also was quite sure Nat had intentionally chosen clips where she hadn't been purposely painting herself as a threat so much in order that the guards wouldn't want to touch her. "What if someone asks for the timestamps after some of these?" she asked hesitantly. "Or...gets all of the footage directly from...the Raft?"
"Then they'll see you making defensive death glares at people torturing you. Or kicking them. Or any of the...nightmare incidents. But we won't share any of that right off the bat. We want the FBI to see you as a victim first, one that doesn't appear she's fighting back constantly. First impressions are important." Natasha sighed, thinking about all of the other mess online and on TV. "Look, if other people are going to use you for their own agendas, then you can easily do the same. But Scott isn't going to be upset with you if we message him not to use any of this."
"I wasn't...fighting back all the time," Wanda whispered. "I couldn't...do...anything. I don't...I do not...think I ever even...hurt...any of them except...that failure of an escape." I can't even talk about it in a normal manner. I'm just...I don't know. The words felt like she was dragging them out, forcing herself to speak when she didn't want to. Wanda was only too aware of her own natural accent growing more and more obvious as she struggled to explain herself.
"You know I've seen the cell footage from those nineteen days, Wanda," Natasha said quietly. "So, yes, you were fighting back, as much as you could."
"I wished I would die, and then I didn't want...that." W-O-U-L-D M-A-K-E P-I-E-T-R-O S-A-D A-N-D P-L-E-A-S-E R-O-S-S. Wanda saw her friend's hands ball into fists, and she instantly wished she had not shared that. Why did I say that? Now she is going to be worried.
Nat's expression darkened. "So, fighting back passively then by continuing on. Still counts. The amount of times I saw you kick a guard, too."
"Didn't do much good."
"It was good for you to do something. Besides, looks like all of the prison guards were such cowards that you simply staring at them scared them."
I suppose. “Well, that works on many people if they know who I am," Wanda deadpanned, a bit amused even though she hated knowing that most people were never going to see her as anything other than the unstable enhanced girl. "I hate this, that I can't be seen as anything else. Either I am a walking nuke or that...victimized...thing in those camera bits." Maybe being a fugitive could be...good. Once I'm recovered, maybe people that see me will really just see a normal, ordinary person. Not the real me, but...something close.
"We won't use those clips if you don't want to," Natasha told her. "I know it's not the same, but you know the team doesn't see you that way."
"Tony does. I think he sees an unstable enhanced girl that can wreck things with her mind, and nothing else. I heard him, last year. Over and over." And I hate it even more because he's not wrong.
Nat sighed. "You know Tony has a big blunt mouth. He may have thought that when you first joined the team, but he doesn't now."
"Then what did he invent a torture device specifically for me for?"
"I'm sorry, Wanda, I don't know. But you could just ask him. I'm sure he would tell you the truth now."
"...Maybe." Wanda closed her eyes, trying to think and not freak herself out again. It doesn't matter. I am out, I am not alone, either. She knew Natasha had given her an out. Though Steve and Nat had gone to the trouble of getting that footage from the Raft during the rescue and Nat must have spent a lot of time going through it, she knew if she did say 'I don't want to do this', that would be the end of it. The second any of this went to the FBI, it would just be a matter of time before it got online, at best floating around in the depths of the dark web somewhere.
Someone might like seeing it. People might say she deserved all of it.
"I think we should use the video," she whispered. Those are not good reasons not to. Even if that did happen, I shouldn't care. Wanda nodded when Nat asked if it was okay to give her a hug. "Let's...get the pictures too."
"Not right now. Take a nap and eat some dinner, and if you still want to afterwards, then we can. I know doing this wasn't easy." Natasha could easily tell Wanda was not, in fact, okay with the plan at all and merely thought this was what they should do. She didn't seem to be panicking, which was good, but she remained tense, her arms anchored across her middle in the awkward restraint position again.
I didn't even get up, Wanda thought, but she didn't protest. A phone rang, thankfully not making the beeping sound, and she looked up at Natasha curiously.
"It's Laura," Nat told her, and picked up the burner. "Hi, Laura," she said into the phone. "You're on the burner I left you, good. Yes, we're safe."
Wanda listened closely, trying to hear whatever Laura was saying in reply, but she couldn't really hear much of anything. I'll just ask Nat once she hangs up.
"Wait until tomorrow before returning just in case? Yeah, sure...definitely." There was a long pause here and Nat's expression went dark. "Understood. I'll let her know. I don't think she wants to talk to Tony yet...I can contact him instead. I'm not making her do it. No, she's doing fine...Sure, I'll ask her." Natasha put her hand over the phone. "Laura wants to know what you'd like for dinner when we go back. And yes, I have things to tell you after."
Wanda blinked in surprise. I actually get to go back? I get to go back to the vacation house again? “Anything is fine."
"Wanda, you must have some idea. You ate nutri-grain bars and muffins fine, but couldn't handle the crunchy cereal this morning because it still hurt to swallow. Tell me what you want so Laura can make a dish you can enjoy," Natasha said firmly.
Wanda did not know how to answer this right now; she did not want to be a bother, and she had no idea what she might want anyway if she could choose whatever she liked. "I...don't know."
Nat sighed and spoke into the phone again. "She's not picky. Just still something on the softer side. Muffins are fine; crunchy cereal still isn't. ...Yes, I'll tell her everything and get word to the rest of the team. Thanks, Laura. We're excited to come back."
Wanda continued watching Natasha as she paced for a few seconds before sitting again. There is something she thinks I won't want to hear. "What does Tony want?" she asked.
"What he wants is to talk to you as soon as possible. What made me angry is that Laura told me when the house was checked yesterday, Tony was able to pull her aside and told her the most recent negotiation reply he'd received was trading in accurate locations for you, Steve, and Bucky...and to help capture the three of you, for everyone else receiving house arrest." Nat looked annoyed again as she continued, "I don't think he actually knows how badly you're injured. I get the impression he wants to plan a staged confrontation and push some paperwork through simultaneously."
What? This did make sense considering those texts from Vision, where he sounded so concerned about some idea that might stress her out. Vis had seen her and would know she could not participate in some plan like that right now, regardless of whether she wanted to or not. Wanda hesitated, looked down at herself, and then back at Natasha. I could talk to him if Nat stays. I don't want to, but I can. "That plan is stupid," she stated emphatically, "but I...I could...talk to him, if I am not...alone." It...may not be stupid though. He cannot tip us off accurately if Ross doesn't trust him, and so he has to do something to make that man trust him. And he's probably trying to protect himself too. Not locating any of us is inherently suspicious.
"If you're sure. Keep in mind he's not going to want to talk to me. I'm the one that betrayed his side regarding the Accords, remember. You never were in the first place, so he won't be as pissed at you. You may not get as much informational discussion as you'd want if I'm there."
"Stay out of the frame, then," Wanda suggested, not particularly caring much if Tony liked that or not. If he realized what she was up to, he would probably be mad at her, too, but too bad.
_________________
Rather than trying to call or get those pictures right then, they decided to wait, or rather, Natasha convinced an obviously tired Wanda to nap for a couple hours and eat something first. Then Wanda hesitantly asked Nat if she could try walking to the mirror over the sink on her own, because she wanted to see her new hair, and she wanted to see herself before she let Natasha take any of those photos.
"Yes, but I'm going to stay within arm's reach just in case," Natasha said in a tone that left no room for argument. "If your ankle starts hurting from you using it, you need to get off it, too, understand? I don't care if it's from just standing, one step, or twenty, you stop immediately."
Wanda did not answer this, because it was still kind of sore anyway, without her putting weight on it at all. It was not killing her or anything, especially in comparison to her bad arm or the burns on her neck, but she knew if she'd twisted her ankle badly the same way back at the Compound, she would probably still be benched on crutches because of it. She was able to slowly stand on her own easily, but took Nat's offer of help after only a step or two, still feeling shaky and unbalanced like when she had gone out on the balcony deck back at the vacation house. I should be stronger by now. It's been over a week and I am still too weak to do this. “I'm sorry," she muttered.
"You're fine, no need to apologize. You aren't leaning on me nearly as much, so that's a lot of progress already." Nat could tell Wanda was very annoyed, but neither of them said anything else as they walked over to the mirror.
Wanda still wasn't entirely sure she really wanted to see herself, but she did really want to see her new red hair, and she hated the idea of taking any pictures without knowing precisely what those pictures were going to be. This was my idea. I should not care. It doesn't matter. She bit her lip and studied her reflection. That girl in the mirror appeared pretty much like she expected, no worse and no better. The red hair was a surprise she was happy to see; she had known, of course, that it was red now, but seeing it in the mirror was different. "I really love my hair," she told Nat, quite pleased. The only thing that genuinely bothered her was looking at the bandages on her neck, because it reminded her of that awful shock collar being there instead. Wanda reached to touch her reflection and then hesitantly began picking at the edge of a piece of tape near her collarbone. "I want to see what it looks like underneath," Wanda whispered, half assuming Nat wouldn't let her peel the tape and bandages off to do so.
"Okay," Natasha said simply, "it's almost time to change those bandages again anyway, and they have to be off to snap any photos, so we can just do those things now." She decided to let Wanda be since she wasn't frightened and clawing at her neck now; she seemed to be calm, even if she wasn't happy. Nat did, however, make her go sit back on the edge of her bed a minute later when she noticed Wanda was starting to avoid putting weight on her bad ankle and the rest of her was shaking, leaning on Nat more than before. "That's enough right now."
"I didn't get to see."
"You're stressing your ankle and didn't tell me it started to hurt."
"It didn't start to hurt. I'm fine."
"Then it hurt already and you didn't say anything." Natasha knew that Wanda must genuinely be feeling somewhat better now since she was starting the 'I want to get up now, I'm fine' behavior, but then that meant Nat would have to keep a closer eye on her to make sure she didn't strain herself. "You can still see if you want to, but you are not walking any more right now."
Wanda blinked, not saying anything to that. She did let Nat gently remove the rest of the dressings on her neck without fuss, but instantly her shoulders tensed again, the same as every other time those burns were exposed to the open air. It's fine. I am fine, I said I wanted to see, and we have to get those pictures. Wanda felt herself being carried back over to the mirror, and she didn't complain about that, either. She did not say anything, just stared at herself for a moment and then closed her eyes. "I'm done," she whispered.
"Do you still want to do this? You don't have to." Nat set her back down on the edge of the bed when she didn't receive any reply. Wanda's eyes remained closed, but she seemed marginally less tense. "Well, I'm going to wait five minutes, and if you don't tell me anything, we're going to re-dress those burns, and we're not taking any pictures today."
N-O. D-O I-T N-O-W. Before I let Nat convince me not to. I have never cared in the least what I looked like after hurting myself before, not on a mission gone wrong anyway, so why should I care now? Wanda glanced at Natasha and then back at the floor. "That is all going to scar." I don't want to see it forever. I'll start thinking about being trapped there again.
"Not all, just the bits where the worst burn damage is probably," Natasha told her truthfully. "The bruising has already faded quite a bit, and those...puncture wounds from the prongs look much, much better. I know the burns still look awful, but they're improving too. Most of that will disappear completely over time. Give it a chance." She would not lie to Wanda about it; that would do no good and the second Wanda found out, she would be far more distressed over being lied to than if she was just told the truth in the first place.
D-O-N-T K-N-O-W W-H-Y I C-A-R-E. Wanda knew Nat had told her the truth, which she appreciated.
"Probably the same reason you mostly avoid letting anyone see those old ones on your back, but don't care about any you got from our missions. You don't like thinking about where they're from." Natasha remembered Wanda adamantly refusing to go into the pool back at the Compound at first, which she had assumed was because the girl didn't know how to swim (which was technically true-she didn't), but then revealed the truth upon being pressed about it directly.
”If I have told you something, do you have to tell anyone?" Wanda asked, her green eyes clearly suspicious.
”Not unless it puts you or anyone else in danger, no, of course not," Natasha assured her. "It's just strange you won't go in the pool when it's obvious to any of us you're interested."
”But, it is stupid."
”Somehow I doubt that."
Wanda stared at Natasha closely for a few more seconds and appeared to abruptly make a decision on something. She spun on her heel facing away from Nat and yanked her black top off over her head. Pink lines of scars crisscrossed her back, clearly years old and completely healed now. "That," she muttered, still facing away, her fingers leaking scarlet wisps again as she pulled the shirt back on, hiding the old marks.
Natasha frowned, understanding that Wanda did not want anyone else to see those scars, but surprised that Wanda trusted her enough to show them to her. "Did you get those while you were with Hydra?"
”Yes. I took punishment for Pietro. He got mad with me after. I am not sorry-I try to protect him. He did always, for me," the younger girl explained simply, her accented English a bit awkward. The wisps of red continued hazing her clenched fists but didn't do anything more.
”You can wear a shirt over your swimsuit if you really want to go in the pool, you know. Nobody has to know, and if anyone did ask, you could just say you don't want sunburn. But I promise no one is going to care if you let the scars show."
Wanda was glad no further questions were asked about it, but this presented another issue: she didn't have a swimsuit in the first place. "I don't have any swimsuit."
”Then get ready to leave. We're going shopping. I think we can find something you like."
”I don't have any dollars saved yet."
”That's okay. Consider it a present."
After a bit of going back and forth where Wanda kept insisting she could wait until she had money herself, Natasha had finally convinced her that it was fine and they lived with a billionaire (Wanda's expression darkened because she did not like being around Tony), so money was not a problem.
"I do not want pictures taken of my back," Wanda said quietly now. She closed her eyes, remembering what had happened so long ago. Pietro had broken a Hydra scientist's arm and then kicked him for groping her, and she'd been so terrified what would happen to her brother that she'd shouted she would take his punishment instead for him, which she did. Even now she was not at all sorry for choosing to protect Pietro, and she knew she would have done the same thing even if she'd known exactly what the punishment was like. What was strangely amusing to her now was that old Strücker had then rewarded them for 'being such loyal siblings' by letting them live in the same cell-room afterward. They even received extra clothing of their choice and food, 'for being my prize pupils'. She could remember lying on her stomach with her head resting on Pietro's lap while they binged episodes of The Brady Bunch on the little TV up in the corner, feeling relieved and happy to be close to her brother and that he was not hurt, even though her back was killing her. Pietro had been so, so angry she had let herself be cut up like that just to protect him.
Wanda thought her younger self had been very, very stupid, to believe anything that Strücker told them, especially when she had thought right from the start that she disliked him, even before receiving her enhancements. He didn't care about Pietro or her. He just told them what they wanted to hear and dangled carrots at them-like the food and preferred clothing and TV show access-so that they would stay. They should have just run away after receiving their enhancements, not stayed because at least they had a roof over their heads and food and clothes, and still thought they were going to help change the world. But no, they'd been threatened into not running anyway, each of them having the other one's safety held over their heads and believing they weren't strong enough to get away and change things on their own. She wondered now if the whole incident had been intentionally staged to see how she and Pietro would react. It probably was, and we played right into it if so.
"Then we won't."
Wanda blinked again, still thinking. The sooner they started, the sooner it would be done. She felt a bit as if something was careening out of control on the inside, her magic on edge and defensive even though nobody was present besides Nat and herself and it did not feel at all back to normal, either. "Can we get it over with?"
"Yes, of course," Nat said quickly.
Snapping the pictures did not take long at all, and Natasha explained step by step exactly what she was taking photos of, which made Wanda feel much more at ease about it. All the same, she immediately curled back up on her bed and pulled the covers over her head when they were done, which Natasha did not question. "I don't want to see them. Send it to Scott," Wanda said, her voice muffled in the pillows.
"I think we should wait until after we talk to Tony. See what information we can get from him. Maybe we won't have to use the photos or the videos at all." Nat paused, knowing Wanda did not want to attempt doing that right now even though she had not said a word, so she changed the subject. "Laura also said Clint called her burner phone. He's safe as well but decided to sleep in the truck rather than go to a motel like us. Last she heard he was in Vermont. Seems like he decided to chew Vision out before they split up and confused him."
This made Wanda look at Nat with great amusement; she had no doubt in her mind that Clint probably had fussed at Vis trying to make sure the synthezoid wouldn't hurt her. "I will call Vis in a bit. He can...find Tony, I suppose. I just...need a few minutes."
"That's fine. Take as long as you need."
__________________
Wanda didn't say anything right away when she put the video call through a little while later. She was happy to see Vision on the other end of the call, but she didn't know what to say, either.
"You are safe?" Vision asked hopefully.
Wanda glanced at Natasha, who remained sitting out of frame, and nodded.
"That is good. Your hair is different."
"Do you like it? I match you now," Wanda said, quite pleased with this comment.
"I do not have hair unless I am disguised," came a puzzled response.
Natasha snorted in amusement hearing this, which made Wanda give her a please shush! look.
"Vis, you are naturally red," Wanda said patiently, "it was supposed to be funny." She could tell he was studying her critically through the camera lens and she would have felt like a bug pinned under a microscope if it was anyone else, but she didn't mind Vision doing that because he wasn't judging her.
"Oh. Well, it looks very nice. It is like Ms. Romanoff's previous hair and it coordinates with your enhancements."
Wanda quite liked that he had figured out her own thoughts without having to hear her explain. She turned a bit pink and said a quiet thank-you. Stop stalling. I should ask him to get Tony. I have to. I can always call again later. And Nat told me to make sure he knows he absolutely cannot let anyone know he has spoken to me. “You'll...wipe me from your phone after?"
"Of course. No one will discover my having contact with you," Vision answered quickly. "Are you feeling any better?"
"I'm okay. Much better than when I was rescued," Wanda told him, which was objectively true. She felt tremendously better than she had the first couple days. Some of her memories from immediately after the Raft escape felt hazy, not in an unpleasant way exactly, just mushed into I am in so much pain right now but I know I'm safe, I have friends with me at least. “Could you...get Tony? I'd much rather just talk to you, but I think I...have to talk to him."
"Are you certain?"
Yes, please just get on with it, I am not going to last long. “Yes." Wanda knew it was stupid, especially since they were planning to use that security footage and potentially those photos to their own advantage, but she had an inexplicable wish to appear as fine as possible if she was going to talk to Tony right now, and she could not really do that. I don't want to tell him anything. I really don't.
"Very well." Wanda watched Vision seemingly phase out of whatever room he was in at the Compound and then return with Tony a few seconds later.
It's fine, I said I wanted to do this, just don't be stupid, she ordered herself. Wanda mustered up a flat, "Hello," and nothing else.
"Hey."
"I heard you wanted to talk to me."
"Figured you'd refuse."
"Well, here I am. What do you want?" That's rude, I should be nice, I have questions myself, Wanda thought, but she couldn't bring herself to apologize for sounding snappish.
"I guess you didn't find the envelope yet," Tony said, genuinely disappointed.
Wanda was quiet for a moment, still unsure how to react to that. "I did. I don't know what to think," she replied finally. Tell the truth. Nicely. “I...I do really appreciate it, so thank you. But you can't...buy me off with money."
"That was an apology, you stubborn thing."
"It did not say that."
"What do you think 'keep it, no strings attached' means?"
That you don't want to actually apologize. “I think you have so much money that...it was easier to give me...all of that than to just...apologize a-and explain." Wanda still could not process just stuffing $150,000 in an envelope like that.
"That's rich, from the girl who gave us all nightmares."
"Excuse me?" This actively pissed Wanda off; her eyes glowed red and her tone changed, accent a bit thicker than usual. "Yeah, no, I do not think so. You got an apology a-and explanation from me already before. And you chose to create Ultron, I didn't force you."
it's partially your fault Pietro is dead if you didn't make a murderbot he would be alive and I shouldn't have just let him take the scepter in the first place so it's my fault too isn't it why did I do any of it back then
"We will not be discussing that," she continued, "I want to know why y-you think I should help you when you created a shock collar specifically for me."
"That wasn't supposed to happen."
"It did not create itself. You couldn't at least make it...less of a torture device?"
"How the hell do you make something like that not a torture device? I shouldn't have invented it in the first place."
"Helpful if you d-don't have your teammates thrown in a...an underwater prison." Thank you for admitting you shouldn't have made it though. Wanda felt her magic stirring in that careening runaway train manner inside again, and she stubbornly shoved the feelings down. "You didn't get the others out. They are n-not enhanced like me. Me, you don't trust. Fine. Very understandable. Very justified. What about the rest?"
"If I'd interfered in the airport, all of us would've been thrown in the Raft, and you know it."
"Next time don't sign trash like the Accords then!" Wanda knew she was straining her voice, because speaking loudly hurt and made her cough, and she was vaguely aware of Nat gesturing for her to shush because someone might hear. Maybe if we had all stood together, the Accords would have been dumped.
"Mr. Stark, this conversation is not helping you or Wanda," Vision jumped in, voice firm. "The problem is Secretary Ross, not you or her for past poor behavior."
"She's being unfair-"
"Okay, let's cut that there," Natasha interrupted, still out of frame. "This is incredibly unhelpful. May I?" she asked Wanda, gesturing to the phone. Wanda immediately nodded and gladly let Nat take it. "Tony, you did get us on the phone. Get to the point, please."
"I told Laura I needed to talk to Wanda, not you, Black Widow."
"You had a chance to talk to her, and you blew it. She didn't help matters snapping like that, but I don't know how you thought she was going to react. She's badly hurt and you seem to think giving her a good chunk of cash is going to automatically make her not upset with you. Look, even you clearly aren't following the Accords yourself. You know all of this is wrong, or you wouldn't have let us have access to your vacation house, warn us, or withhold information from Ross and lie to him." Nat debated with herself for a moment, glancing at Wanda before adding, "You just brought up the nightmare incident from last year over her pointing out you gave her money instead of an apology and explanation, which she did not even deliver in a snotty manner. Low blow. She messed up then, sure, but that wasn't fair."
"How can you still be so blasé about that now when you were the one who took it the worst?"
Natasha's eyes flashed briefly before she said flatly, "Being unresponsive temporarily is hardly creating a world-destroying murderbot, Tony. She was completely in the wrong for what she did, but she most certainly did not force you to create Ultron. That is on you. Sorry I sympathize with another girl that has experienced the same manipulative abuse I did. Leave her be."
"I don't know what to say to her. I never, ever wanted her hurt like that just because she's dan-"
"No, no, you don't get to say that. She isn't dangerous. No more than the rest of us are. That's-"
"Nat, let me talk to him," Wanda said quietly, holding her hand out for the phone. Tony already knows Nat is with me, so it doesn't matter now. I can ask some questions.
Natasha muted the microphone on their end. "Wanda, you can't shout or let your magic react in here, no matter what. End the call if you have to, okay?"
Wanda nodded again, mentally ordering herself to behave calmly. I can do this. I need to ask my questions and find out exactly what Tony wants from me, and exactly what horrid Ross is up to. “I am here again."
"Great. You going to shout again?"
"No, but I have questions I want answered, please."
"Sure, shoot."
"Did you tell any of the team you...invented that collar?" Wanda bit the inside of her lip, hoping very much to hear a no, but also wanting the truth. Nat is here with me. It's fine, I'm fine, everything is fine.
"No. That was never meant to be used on you, Wanda. You piss me off sometimes, but I never, ever wanted that prototype or anything like it put on you." Tony rather thought Natasha looked more angry than Wanda at this point, which was...not great, to say the least. Wanda tended to wear her heart on her sleeve, and she did not make it a secret when displeased. Natasha often did disguise her feelings, so her visibly appearing angry and more so than Wanda did was very off-putting.
I want to scream. You had to spend hours creating it, you never thought, 'hey maybe this isn't a good idea'? Or do one of the things Clint pointed out that could have been made instead? I don't understand. Wanda was glad Natasha stayed next to her, not interrupting, just staying nearby for moral support. "When did you make it?" she asked next.
"After you soloed every other person on the team except Vision in a one-on-one your first day training with zero practice whatsoever, when we were trying to get a baseline from you power-wise and skill-wise for future reference." Tony looked very guilty, which made Wanda all the more certain this was the truth.
"Mr. Stark, why would you do that? Is that not what we are supposed to do when training?" Vision sounded utterly baffled. "She was ordered not to hold back. So she did not. Why does it matter that she defeated almost everyone? If I remember correctly, she could not come anywhere close to a win against anyone when practicing without accessing her enhancements. Therefore, she has strengths and weaknesses like everyone else."
"It is not my fault all of you went easy on me because I was the new glass cannon person with no experience. I do hope you did that before I apologized to you," Wanda said flatly. Then I could understand.
"Well...yeah, of course. I certainly wouldn't have done it after."
Wanda tossed the phone on the bed, rested her head on her knees, and found herself holding back laughter. That sounded so ridiculous to her she didn't feel she could even be truly angry anymore. Okay. That was definitely the truth. Between the odd explanation and Vision's matter of fact questions and comments, she was more amused than anything else at this point. She could easily remember that first day; she'd still been so upset and angry that Pietro was gone and it felt so good to be ordered to purposely fight with her magic, because it felt like an outlet of sorts, and it was maddening that the rest of the team was going easy on her in the first place...all of them except Natasha, who had flat out said, "I am not going easy on you, because you don't need that."
Nat had proceeded to knock the wind out of her sending her flat on the floor in about two seconds when she didn't use her magic, while the reverse happened when Wanda did use her magic.
Probably starting to tear up Tony's Iron Man suit did not exactly endear her to him to say the least, but they had all told her don't hold back, no lethal behavior or mind tricks, but otherwise no holds barred multiple times, so she'd done what she was told. But she could understand what had made Tony react like that, because he was probably scared, angry, and defensive, just like her. And if it was before she'd apologized to him, he might have thought she would kill him or something back then. This made most of the anger from knowing where that shock collar had come from fade, not the hurt feelings, but the anger, yes.
Wanda glanced at Nat again, whose often difficult to read expression looked rather angry. I A-M F-I-N-E, she signed quickly, and picked up the phone again. "I am being honest when I say I...do not feel inclined to help you. But I'm selfish. I think maybe...this could help us too." Wanda hesitated, looked at Natasha yet again, and then back at Tony on the screen. He looked somewhat relieved, and that was confusing. She could see Vision calmly waiting behind him, and found that helpful. She could pretend she was talking to him instead. "Do you have security footage from the Raft?"
"No, Ross won't let me have any more of it," Tony said, just as Vision said, "I can easily acquire it."
"Vision, you do that, and Ross will know you can hack any security system instantly. He'll order you to use that skill to find your girl and the other fugitives."
"He will not if he does not see me. Moreover, I have told you she is not mine, she is her own person."
"Never mind that," Wanda said firmly. If Ross would not let Tony have the footage, then he must be concerned what Iron Man might be able to do with it. "We have video from the cell block."
Tony leaned forward with interest. "You do?"
"Yes." Wanda looked at Nat hopefully, wanting her to come into frame again and explain. I can't talk about this. I'm going to break down again if I do.
Luckily Natasha understood, and she came to sit beside Wanda so that both of them were on the video call now. "All nineteen days' worth. There's plenty of evidence to prove the conditions in that prison are terrible, that Wanda was being tortured there, and used to threaten her team. Sounds like Ross won't let you have the footage because he knows it's proof," Nat said matter-of-factly.
"Do you have anything from interrogation sessions? Enhanced interrogation is illegal too."
"There were no cameras in that room," Wanda answered sharply. "So no."
Natasha kept her voice and expression neutral, though Wanda sensed her friend was extremely displeased right now. "I think video of her being shocked repeatedly for absolutely nothing is enough evidence of torture and mistreatment in general. You were not shown an accurate representation of what went on constantly in that prison when you visited. I'm guessing all you saw was each of them in individual cells and the way Wanda was kept restrained, right?"
"Yes. She looked banged up, but honestly I thought it mustn't be that bad since she snapped at me when I saw her and acted like she was fine. I can see that...isn't accurate, looking at her now. You need anything extra for that busted arm, little witch?"
Wanda blinked, disliking the nickname but also feeling strangely reassured hearing that offer. She instinctively held her splinted arm close, but shook her head. "No, but thank you anyway. ...Why did you help us if y-you thought it was fine?" Wanda asked, her voice shaking slightly.
Tony stared at her, oddly silent for once. "Uh, you were tied up like an unruly dog and it was wrong. There were visible marks on you, not from all of us squabbling in Leipzig. Trouble being if that was all I had to go on...can't exactly make a decent argument not to restrain you, because if you'd been put in a cell the normal way, you'd escape immediately, Miss Mysterious Enhanced. And people like Ross gonna say, oh, the WMD had to be weakened so she wouldn't wreck the place."
Wanda wanted to be angry at him for saying all of that, but mostly she just felt empty and deflated, because she knew Tony was a hundred percent right. If he tried to lobby for the horrible constant restraints to stop, that was exactly what would happen. Nobody would listen to him; he would be dismissed as being biased because she used to be a member of his team. And he wouldn't have been told about the lack of food and sleep, the repeated drug injections, or anything else. All he knew then was that someone had been roughing her up a bit, but he certainly couldn't see the burns beneath the collar or all the bruises hidden by her clothes. She hadn't yet had her arm injured or twisted her ankle when Tony visited the Raft, either. Ross has been lying to him, by leaving things out.
"I did try to convince Ross to get that straitjacket off you, because assuming the collar was functioning as originally intended, that would be unnecessary regardless, but he wouldn't listen and kept saying he wasn't taking any chances."
Knowing that someone who genuinely did not even like her much had really been speaking up on her behalf helped a little. Wanda blinked quickly, forcing herself not to cry, and nodded a bit. "I, um. I like to know...that. Thank you," she whispered.
Tony frowned, finding this reply odd because the girl sounded far, far more grateful for just that than she did about finding the money. "Whatever, you're welcome," he mumbled. "Not like it fixed anything or meant much."
"It means...much to me, that you tried," Wanda told him, which was the truth. If Tony tried to do that, he most certainly wouldn't have approved of the other awful things going on, either. But he didn't know about all of that.
"Tony, the Raft was not so-called 'only' keeping her restrained in that inhumane manner constantly. There are so many incidents where she was sitting in that cell doing nothing and you see a guard walk by and set that shock collar off. Not for any reason other than that they thought it was funny." Natasha kept her voice steady, but she felt like snapping herself despite knowing it would not help. Going through all of that footage herself had pissed her off; and while she would not tell Wanda, it made her want to go after Ross and any guards that had participated in torturing Wanda for fun, and eliminate all of them. "They grabbed her by the hair to inject her with some kind of sedative pretty much daily, wouldn't let her talk despite allowing the boys to talk as much as they wanted, not to mention being dragged off to be tortured almost every day. She has fractured bones. She has severe burns on her neck. She was not 'only' restrained like you were shown during your visit and slapped around a bit." I will not share the worst of it...I promised Wanda I wouldn't tell anyone those things.
Tony looked very disturbed. "That thing was designed to keep her from using her enhancements, not...do anything like that to her."
"What the hell did you think would happen knowing your dumb prototype you never meant to be actually used was put on her? She's a young enhanced person tossed in a poorly run maximum security prison with an unremovable shock collar on, left in a straitjacket 24/7. The staff was bored and decided to entertain themselves abusing a prisoner that they were still scared of besides. Forget whether she's innocent or not in the eyes of the law. Even if someone decided to argue that she had to be restrained differently than the others because she's enhanced, there's no argument at all for doing things like that to her." Natasha looked over at Wanda, who was silent and focused on the wall now, obviously struggling to maintain composure. "We need a minute. Please hold."
The second their side of the call was muted, Wanda scooted herself to the edge of the bed out of frame of the waiting call before letting her expression fall. "I do not want to be on the call any more," she said as quickly as possible, "so I think I will...wait in the bathroom until it is done. I'll do whatever you think is best. I will not help Tony with his plan, period, until I'm...back to normal. After, I will, if you think it will help." Normal. I don't have one. Discarding that thought, Wanda finished, "I don't feel like I want to help him, honestly. But I want to help us, and he doesn't deserve the Raft either. I do not want him there f-for...helping hide me."
Natasha nodded. "Got it. You'll be okay shut in that microscopic bathroom until I'm done with the call?"
"Yes. I know you are here, and I will keep the light on. Tell Vis I say bye? Please."
____________________
Natasha helped Wanda walk to the bathroom before returning to the video call. Wanda did genuinely seem fine-she clearly much preferred the idea of waiting alone over being on the call any longer-but Nat still didn't particularly feel comfortable leaving her alone. "You're stuck with me because Wanda says she is finished with this call for now. Vision, she says bye to you."
Vision was disappointed that Wanda wasn't coming back onto the video call, but very unsurprised.
"If you can get some of those video clips here to the Compound. I'm pretty sure I can do something with that," Tony said in a far more subdued voice than usual.
"Great, so actually we will be sending them to the FBI ourselves. What we would like is if those things get leaked, some nice, subtle outrage on your part."
"Natasha, they'll probably go into a mysterious black hole and you know it. You and that enhanced girl don't trust me. I get that. The feeling is mutual. But you'd be better off purposely leaking these videos yourselves. Or take some photos of her injuries and get it to a media outlet," Tony suggested.
"We do have pictures, but I am not sending photos of Wanda's injuries to the media on purpose, Tony," Nat said firmly. "She's not you, she doesn't feel comfortable having public pictures of her everywhere even under normal conditions, let alone sensitive ones where she's badly hurt."
"You share security footage, and it will end up on the dark web somewhere, if not normal news sites. That's going to happen regardless of whether I help you or not. Little Red's going to have to deal either way." Tony scowled at Natasha, obviously annoyed. "Look, get the video and pics here to the Compound or don't. Your choice. But if you're just trying to protect Wanda from having to deal with that, you can't use that evidence at all."
"Sharing it also may make everything worse," Vision put in, his voice thoughtful. "Regardless of whether she would feel comfortable with proceeding with that or not, it would make it extremely difficult to hide. You must keep her safely hidden away until she heals, Ms. Romanoff, please. There would be no guarantee the desired results occur, and if it did fail, it would make everything much worse."
"Ross is on my tail about finding any and all of you. If we can successfully get Scott and Clint 'caught' and on house arrest, he'll probably chill for awhile. Not finding any of you at the vacation house helped, but he thinks there's something wrong with Vision's behavior, because he's acting distracted, and I'm having to focus on the ideas that you still have a quinjet and an enhanced person capable of mind-control in the group. It's certainly not helping any of your reputations, especially hers."
Natasha considered this; it was maddening, but she knew Wanda would tell her to use whatever means necessary to keep their little group safe. "What if we gave up the quinjet? Ross would then believe we'd be easier to find." We could navigate airports fine if necessary. Just need to protect Scott and Wanda; they'd be most likely to give us away, probably.
"Could probably work. I'll make an excuse to come by the vacation house in a few days and regroup again."
"Also, just so you know, Wanda did tell me she will not help you stage anything until she's back to normal. However, at that point, she would be willing if necessary."
"Perhaps all of us should do nothing as of yet. Mr. Stark, you said the Barton family could not remain at the vacation house after the summer because Miss Lila and Mister Cooper would have to go back to school at that point. Maybe by then, Wanda will have completely recovered and it would not be so difficult for her to hide in plain sight." Vision was still very, very laser focused on keeping Wanda safe; he didn't want anyone else in danger either, but after organizing all of his priorities in his head, he had realized that programming or not, she was at the top of his list. This was probably wrong, but it appeared nobody in charge was going to speak up in her defense, and he hated that.
"I get the idea you want to skip off into the sunset with Wanda," Natasha teased.
"I should like to take her to a dinner. That is something humans do for someone they care for, is it not?"
___________________
Wanda jumped when she heard a familiar light knock on the bathroom door, but quickly twisted the doorknob open with a tiny bit of her magic, finding that easier to do than opening it the ordinary way. "I'm sorry I left," she whispered.
"That's nothing to be sorry for. That is recognizing your own boundaries of what you can handle right now, which is a good thing." Natasha was glad her younger teammate appeared to be mostly fine; she was tense but nothing more, and she wasn't squeezing herself into a ball like she tended to do when frightened. "And next time, you tell Vision if he's doing something you don't feel comfortable with. You shouldn't have been letting him stroke your hair if you don't like it."
Wanda let Natasha help her limp back to bed, grateful to not have to be so close to the cold floor in the bathroom, which had been reminding her of the cold cell floor back in that prison. She did not think she really felt that bad right now, just very tired. "I felt like...telling him that was mean, because I didn't...mind before. I liked it before."
"If he thinks you saying you do not want your hair touched is rude, he's not worth caring about the way you do. It has nothing to do with why you do or don't like it."
"But I...don't mind you helping me take care of it. I felt ridiculous and illogical. Vis didn't do anything to...make me not trust him." And I felt comfortable with him holding me. That made me happy. Wanda wasn't surprised that Nat had brought this up, but she was still disappointed with herself for reacting that way before. Both of them left me behind in the airport. It's just...I know Nat could not have gotten me out. Vis could have. I completely understand why he didn't, but it still hurts anyway.
Natasha frowned and sat next to her. "Is it because males were grabbing you by the hair multiple times in that prison, or is it because he didn't take you out of Leipzig and you know he had the power to do so and I didn't?"
I D-O-N-T K-N-O-W. "He did nothing wrong...not rescuing me." He just wanted to protect people.
"I disagree, but regardless, believing that isn't going to erase feeling hurt about it. You should be honest with him next time you see him."
"I don't know how." And I don't want to hurt his feelings or chase him away, either. Wanda twirled a wisp of scarlet in her hand and then dispelled it again. Vis had known something was wrong with her already; he'd sensed something not quite right with her enhancements, and he had wanted to help her feel better because he knew she was hurting. He wasn't going to mind if she tried to be honest and it didn't make sense. Still, she didn't want to talk about this any more right now. "I don't want any of that pain medicine tonight," she announced.
Natasha looked at her suspiciously, both at the abrupt topic change and because she was unsure if Wanda really felt that much better all of a sudden that she would sleep decently without it. "Why do I think you don't suddenly feel that much better right now?"
"...Can I try?"
"Yes, that's fine," Nat said quickly, not caring for that nervous edge in Wanda's voice, worried Wanda might think someone was going to force her to take it. "But you need to tell me if you can't sleep properly without it."
I'm used to not sleeping through the night. It doesn't matter. “Okay. I can do that." Wanda decided this was a good compromise, though she had a feeling Nat's definition of sleeping properly did not match hers. "What happened after I left?"
"The call? We have to leave the vacation house by the end of summer at the latest, when Lila and Cooper go back to school. So it might be better to wait until once we get to our new safe house, wherever we decide to go, to try using our evidence."
"Because we can't hide me."
"Because it'll be much, much easier once you're healed. We use our evidence now and it'll be far too easy to ID you. To both get Ross off Tony's case for awhile and hopefully get Scott home, we can give up the quinjet. Clint will already be with Laura and the littles anyway, so this won't be preventing anyone from seeing their kids." Natasha was relieved Wanda seemed to instantly understand the plan; she was nodding and looked thoughtful.
"If we do give up the quinjet, it will be hard to change locations easily," Wanda said slowly.
"If you have a better plan or even just a different one, I want to hear it. You have the same input on this as the rest of us."
I do? I feel like I don't, because I still can't really do much yet. Wanda was silent as she mulled this over, but finally just stared up at the ratty ceiling and said, "I just don't want to put any of you in danger. I'm not stupid, I know I am why this is...complicated. I have an obvious accent, I'm very visibly injured...and I am the one Ross wants to capture the most."
"I can help you learn to disguise your accent better easily enough. That's something we can practice while we're still relaxing safe at the vacation house. Your English is much, much smoother than last year naturally already. If we really are able to stay there the rest of the summer, I think that will be plenty of time both for you to heal-at least mostly-and practice disguising your accent." Natasha sighed, knowing Wanda really did have a point about Ross being after her, but there was nothing to be done about that. The best thing they could do was make it as difficult to identify Wanda as possible. Hoping it would put Wanda in a better mood, Nat added, "Your synthezoid friend did say he wants to take you out to dinner."
Sure enough, Wanda's eyes sparkled with great interest at this comment. "I would like that very much."
Notes:
I simultaneously loved and hated writing this chapter, because I can’t decide if I’m satisfied or not with the banter between Tony and Wanda lol! Hopefully it came off okay.
Next chapter, Wanda and Nat will indeed return to the vacation house, but an unexpected incident might make the trip bumpy...
Any kudos/comments are greatly appreciated!:)
Chapter 13: Chapter 13
Summary:
In which Nat and Wanda run into an unpleasant hiccup before they are able to make the trip back to the vacation house....
Notes:
It was kind of fun to actually have our team handle A Small Issue in this chapter despite having to stay completely under the radar for now lol! I hope you enjoy:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda did wake up during the night, but rather than ignoring that she didn't feel well or letting Natasha give her that same old pain medicine she hated, she asked if there was maybe something else she could have that wasn't as potent. Nat was so pleased that Wanda had actually been willing to wake her up to request something that it made Wanda confused. "You s-said...to?"
"Well, yes, but you are stubborn and don't listen a lot of the time. I was worried you'd refuse to ask for anything, and honestly, I'm glad you're being clear that you don't feel well at all but do feel better than a few days ago. That's good." Natasha knew quite well someone else besides Wanda probably would still need the other pain meds, but she also knew if she was in Wanda's place, she'd do the exact same thing. "We have some extra-strength Tylenol, do you want to have that instead?"
"Okay." This was something Wanda was familiar with, and it usually just made her sleepy, which was fine since she wanted to go back to sleep anyway. In a minute or two, her focus snapped to the door, sensing something outside she did not like. That same man is outside again. Feeling on edge, she tensed and sat up straight. Something is wrong. This isn't a nightmare, me being scared because I'm in pain, or my magic behaving strangely. Or even just that man. “Nat, something isn't right," Wanda murmured so quietly Natasha could hardly hear her. And I smell something odd, too.
Natasha frowned, thinking that she too thought something didn't feel right. The air had a sharp acrid tang in it and it seemed to originate from somewhere close by. On instinct, she shoved the few items they had out into their bags and the non-perishable food into its box. "We're leaving. We were going to officially check out in the morning anyway, and I already paid up front. I don't like this." She put the Tylenol and a flavored water in Wanda's backpack, saying to just wait and take it once they were back in the car. If she and Wanda both thought something was wrong, it was pretty much guaranteed to be the case, and Natasha had no wish to risk waiting for something to happen and then having difficulty removing themselves from the area unidentified.
Both of them stared toward the door, hearing shouting outside. "Okay," Natasha decided, "I'm going to help you to the car so you're at least safely out of the building in case there really is danger of fire, and then I'll come back for our supplies. I don't want us to lose those, but if something must be left behind, it is not going to be either of us."
Wanda did not like this plan, some inkling that neither of them should be out there alone poking at her thoughts. I should stop worrying. Nat certainly doesn't need me. "Can I carry something so we can...just make one trip?" And I don't want to be in the car alone, I'm irrationally scared of it and-
"No, because I don't think you're strong enough yet without using your magic, and so far nobody's identified us." Natasha thought for a moment and then pulled Wanda's gun back out. "Put that in your pocket. Look at me." Wanda took a few seconds to do so, but finally did as she was told. "I don't want you to rip anyone's mind apart or give them nightmares, but if you can make someone that's after us merely forget, without leaving any trace behind or visibly doing anything-like your eyes glowing-then do it. I'd rather you be safe than continue following rules laid out previously."
"I don't know." Nat wants me to do that? Why is she saying that's okay now?
"Then just don't do it unless it's a life or death situation. Don't pull your gun either unless I can't handle it alone. I want as little unique attention on you as possible." Natasha made sure Wanda understood what they were doing. "If for any reason I don't return within a few minutes, you call Clint's burner number we saved in your phone, okay? I know you can defend yourself decently even right now, but I don't want you being seen using your magic, either. Don't try to come find me."
W-O-N-T L-E-A-V-E Y-O-U, Wanda signed stubbornly.
Natasha glared at her in frustration. "Get up and let's get out of here," she ordered, hoping that nothing would actually happen, because she knew quite well the younger girl would not listen. Even on missions, she absolutely would not leave anyone behind, and now they were not even on a mission, so Nat couldn't even cite that as a reason for her to obey. This had always been a source of contention, because while Wanda did her best to please and do what she was supposed to do otherwise...this was something she would not budge on. More than once she had lied and said she was coming back to the recon location when ordered to, and then stayed alone somewhere briefly to retrieve a member of the team that was stuck rather than withdrawing and returning with help. Once she had even done that with Tony, who all of them knew was by far her least favorite teammate, the feeling was mutual, and they could be heard bickering at each other over the malfunctioning comms. But, they did get out mostly unscathed besides some minor scrapes and such.
Mostly Nat was just mad the girl seemed to have this code hardwired into her for everyone else, but then proceeded to say repeatedly that Nat should leave her behind because she was making it hard to hide.
Wanda did see-or rather, felt-that same man that had been wanting Nat before as Natasha helped her out to their car, but he was not paying Natasha or her any mind; he was arguing with two other people. I don't want to be in here, I hate it, it's all closed in and I'm-
A loud alarm made her want to put her hands over her ears, but she couldn't with her bad arm, and she sat there curled in a ball with her good hand over one ear and her shoulder jammed against the other, ignoring that doing so creased the burns and so made her neck hurt worse. I want Nat to come back. The noise reminded her of those alarms going off back on the Raft, and she was back there all of a sudden, confused and half-conscious on the cold floor.
...and then Steve and Nat were there, the logical bit of her poked at her racing thoughts, you were hurt so bad but they were getting you and the rest out. The alarm was not a bad thing. That was the beginning of the horrible things stopping finally. Something knocked loudly against the car window, making her flinch.
No red eyes, Wanda reminded herself, keeping them shut.
"Where's your friend? I just want to see her."
Wanda blinked; she had zero inclination to answer the man at all, and now there were two others near him too. One was holding a sparkler or something similar, the other had a gas can in his hand, and all three looked somewhat 'off'. Messing around with sparklers-or fireworks-and gas while drunk or high (or both) on something was very bad and explained the weird smell that had set both Natasha and herself off. Nat, please come back, I could do something, but I will reveal...me. I don't know what to do.
"Eh, there's something wrong with her. She won't answer." He looked extremely disappointed but began to wander off...and then he came back, making some comment that she was a girl, she would do just fine instead, so she should come out and he could show her a good time.
I don't think so. Trying to think how an ordinary person in her place might react, Wanda had an idea. Lina could call the police. Ana would have told her that. Keeping an eye on the man, she quickly dialed the burner number Nat had given her to reach Clint rather than actually calling the cops, hoping that even if he did not pick up, the idea that this man's target might be calling the police would chase him away before Natasha came back. But Clint answered immediately, asking what was wrong that she was calling at three in the morning. Using her Lina voice and hoping he would understand what she was doing, she explained the situation haltingly, as if she couldn't think of the correct words in English easily.
"Kid, you don't sound like you normally do. Are you acting or are you really in big trouble? What's going on? I hear shouting in the background. I can come if you need me to, but I'm hours away from you."
Wanda squeezed herself into a tighter ball, still hating being in the car by herself, though having something to do was helping her not to completely panic despite being alone. She switched to Sokovian, figuring these drunk idiots wouldn't understand her anyway. "Both, I'm scared, but I'm not hurt...no more than before. I don't know how to get rid of or stop these people without revealing me or...Ana. I think she's not...coming back immediately because she's also avoiding a confrontation." And she thinks I am safe here in the car.
"Wanda, I gather you're playing Lina, but I can't understand you. Do you want me to call the police and ditch this burner? I don't really want to send cops over there knowing you and Nat aren't gone yet." Clint hesitated, figuring Wanda and Natasha together could easily handle whatever this was under ordinary circumstances even with Wanda being injured. The problem was fixing the situation to protect others in the vicinity while also keeping them from being identified. "Call your dense red boyfriend," Clint said reluctantly. "He can get there much more quickly than I can and he's not on the run, let's be real. Act like you've just called a friend that told Lina how to call the cops. These guys'll be angry with you for it but won't suspect your identity, either. Understand?"
"Da, I understand. Call police now," Wanda said. "911."
"Call me again once you and Nat are away from there. Please. You two are like magnets for trouble," Clint grumbled. Then he hung up before either of them could say more.
The shouting outside grew louder; the one man that she had disliked from the start was angry that she was ignoring him and threatening horrible things if she didn't put the phone down. You have no idea who you are talking to, Wanda thought, finding this morbidly hysterical now. I can't run away, I can't even drive right now, but I could knock him out instantly if I wanted to. His behavior, rather than scaring her, was kind of reassuring since he would not be acting like that if he knew who she was and what she was capable of doing to him. The second she heard a worried Vision on the other end of the call, she blurted out the motel address-thank goodness it was visible on the motel's sign-and repeated her Lina-voice explanation briefly. Then she finished, in Sokovian, since she knew he would understand her, "Not in your human disguise. I'm worried the other motel guests are in danger and I can't do anything without identifying myself. Please, I don't want to bother you, but-"
"I told you to contact me if you were in trouble. I am already on the way." Vision did not ask for more information; he could understand well enough. Wanda wanted him to come as Vision the Avenger, not Vis her friend, because she could not easily contact the police herself and didn't know what else to do. He also suspected that not all of the fear in her voice was just acting. Something had genuinely frightened her and he didn't believe this creepy man after Natasha and her was what had really scared her. "You and Ms. Romanoff should get out of the vicinity. I will take care of it."
Wanda was so relieved that she began crying, and usually she would at least try to hold it in, but Lina could cry, she should be terrified. "Thank you," she whispered, and hung up. She could see Nat finally coming back now-how long had it been?! it felt like ages even though it couldn't have been more than a few minutes-and her hand flitted to the gun in her pocket. If any of them bother her...
But Natasha strode to the SUV, appearing thoroughly unbothered. "I just know you wouldn't bother my cousin," she said sweetly.
"Aw, I was just asking where you were."
"Oh, really? Because she's a minor. You don't want her, you could get into trouble," 'Ana' said in the same pleasant voice. Nat quickly shoved their things into the hatchback and closed it again.
"I think she called the cops on me." Now the man sounded like he was pouting. "How should I know she's a minor?"
Wanda did not call the police. I know she wouldn't have. Nat was quite sure Wanda had either faked the whole thing, or she'd called Clint or Vision pretending she had called 911. "Oh, probably just a misunderstanding," Natasha said breezily, "you probably scared her."
Under other circumstances, Wanda might have been annoyed that Natasha was claiming she was a kid to twist the situation to their favor, but right now she did not care. Already the man had backed off, and seemed to realize he had done something stupid. She watched, fascinated, as her friend turned the tables on him and feigned disappointment that he was leaving, and turned into a flirty person nothing like Nat's normal self. No weapons were drawn and Nat didn't even have to touch him other than scribbling something on his hand. In a minute or two the man disappeared into his hotel room and Natasha returned to the car with a bounce in her step. "You got rid of him," Wanda said quietly.
"Told you I could. Didn't even cost us anything since the phone number I wrote is fake and smeared on his drunk hand besides. Wanda, are you really okay? I-"
"Nat, the other guests here are in danger," Wanda interrupted, her shoulders still tense. "I called Vis a-and he's coming, but..."
"Then we're out of here," Natasha said firmly. "We are not staying here. There's already more people coming outside because the fire alarm went off." She did not bother trying to get Wanda's seatbelt on her this time, more concerned with getting out of the parking lot quickly. Nat just tucked a pillow beneath Wanda's broken arm like before and then drove them away from the noise behind them.
Wanda shakily called Clint back as promised. "We're out," she said the second he picked up. "I put you on speaker so Nat can hear too."
"Good."
"Clint, go back to the vacation house whenever," Nat told him, quickly explaining the information Laura had relayed to her. "It's going on 4am now...Wanda and I will be back this morning around nine, I suppose. Figure it'll be better if we don't come back at the same time though."
"You and Wanda go back ASAP, okay? I'd rather be the one to wait longer. I'll come around noon then. You two attract trouble like a dog attracts fleas." Clint sounded so frustrated. "It sounded like there was some asshole pervert shouting because Wanda wasn't paying attention to him."
"Right, because that's completely our fault," Natasha deadpanned. "I chased him off just fine. All he got from us is a smeared, fake phone number."
"Wanda, tell your robot friend about it so he'll get rid of the guy for you."
Wanda found this irrationally funny and couldn't keep the amusement out of her voice. "Vis would not kill him," she said quietly.
"Eh. Debatable. You two are okay?"
"We're fine," Natasha told him firmly. "I'm not hurt at all, and Wanda is already a little stronger than when we separated a couple days ago. She's safe, Clint, I'll protect her, I promise."
__________________
Natasha did pull into a brightly lit but empty rest stop awhile later, parking near a picnic table, knowing it would help if Wanda could get out of the car for even just a minute or two. Wanda was very sleepy since she had taken her Tylenol and sipped some water, but she willingly let Nat help her climb out of the car all the same. Natasha took her over to the wooden picnic table and simply sat there with her. Wanda closed her eyes and rested her head on Nat's shoulder. "Thank you," Wanda said now. This was nice; she still felt so tired, but not so nervous and shut in anymore. Being outside in the dark almost-dawn breeze was calming to her, and she kind of liked pretending she really was just a girl on a normal road trip with her friend. I still hate actually being in the car, but otherwise...I like pretending.
"I know you still hate being in the car right now. I figured a short break would help, especially after dealing with that nonsense before I came back with our supplies."
"Well, he clearly didn't know me," Wanda said, a hint of amusement in her tone now, "because if he did, he wouldn't have...spoken to me like that." I guess I must have been convincing enough. “Remember the amusement park last year?" Now she sounded incredibly entertained. Nat had dragged a very reluctant Wanda off for a short vacation to meet up with Clint and his family one weekend, and while she had ended up really enjoying herself, there had also been some guy near her own age that kept bugging her while standing in line. First she pretended not to understand English, which was ruined when he overheard her talking to Cooper a little later. Then she told him she had a boyfriend. Then she claimed her father was waiting at the ride exit and would kill him if he saw.
The last straw was the person touching her on the butt when they ended up in the same row because Cooper wanted to sit up front. Then she stopped playing nice, let her eyes glow red, and threatened to undo his lap bar during the ride if he didn't stop harassing her, which clearly terrified him and he screeched about it. Obviously she did not do that, but Cooper and Natasha had been laughing hysterically the entire ride afterwards. Needless to say the person did not bother her anymore...and then he apologized and appeared much chastened, and wanted pictures, once he put together that not only had he been bothering an enhanced girl, this girl was also with Black Widow, one of the Avengers. This didn't explain Cooper's presence, but still. Needless to say she would not let him have his requested selfie photo and relished telling him 'absolutely not'.
"Yeah, I would have interfered if you hadn't done anything after he touched you, but I wanted you to take care of it yourself." Nat remembered the incident very clearly, and mostly she had just been delighted to see Wanda speak up for herself outside of a mission context or something, especially after the previous roof incident barely three months before.
"I could not ride anything now," Wanda said suddenly, her body tense again now.
Nat frowned, easily suspecting the reason for that; she did not think Wanda meant she couldn't because she was physically hurt right now. She would probably panic being restrained or otherwise strapped in to ride anything and I don't blame her. “We can't go to one right now anyway," Nat told her quietly. "Even if we could, you do not have to go on anything. Though, being outdoors would probably make any restraints not so bad, yes?"
Wanda didn't answer right away; she felt a bit self-conscious that Natasha knew what was bothering her even though she hadn't explicitly explained herself, but the parts of her that wanted someone to know, to understand what was wrong but still not make a fuss about it, retreated into an odd sort of contentment, like a warm soft pillow swallowing her right up. "I don't know," she answered honestly, "it might even really be fine if I wasn't in pain any more. Right now the idea just scares me." There. I have said the truth smoothly and I didn't coat it with sugar, either.
Natasha felt a wave of surprised peace flood her rather abruptly, and knew those were not really her own feelings, not entirely; they were amplified tenfold from Wanda, who had no idea her emotions were literally leaking out of her like that. Somewhere else, she might have warned Wanda she was emotion projecting again, but knowing the girl was genuinely at peace while talking about something that bothered her was much more important, and telling Wanda about it would probably make her close off into her shell again. What Wanda was doing now was harmless, anyway, and couldn't be traced to her easily, unlike projecting physical pain on someone. Instead Natasha said nothing and just gave her a hug.
"What is this for?"
"Just glad you're talking, that's all."
"I should talk more then," Wanda said in a faux serious tone, still rather confused at randomly receiving a hug even if it was not unwelcome. "We can go whenever. I am okay now," she added.
"Walk back over to the car, or carry you this time?" Nat asked, figuring letting Wanda have a choice would be best.
Wanda thought for a minute, trying to be realistic as she glanced over the short distance from where they were sitting at the picnic table over to the SUV. And honest. I should be honest. "I think I am strong enough, but my ankle is still...a bit sore."
Natasha suspected 'a bit sore' was an understatement, and it worried her that Wanda, someone who constantly claimed to be fine when it was clearly untrue, would now be saying she felt strong enough to do something but that it would hurt her. "If you don't want to be carried, then use me as a crutch. Don't put any more weight on it right now, okay? I don't like that it's not feeling better yet. That should feel somewhat better by now, even if you're still a little shaky."
"It does feel better than before. Told you I am a burden. You are literally having to drag me around," Wanda said as they went back to the car, but she did as she was told.
"Wrong. I'm making sure you don't hurt yourself further. You were willing to be honest about how you felt. Now let me provide appropriate help." Natasha made sure Wanda was settled safely back in their vehicle and went through the same 'describe where we are' process again so that she would be okay about the anxiety over the seatbelt.
Once they were back on the road, Natasha considered whether or not to try and get more details from Wanda about how she was feeling, because it was very obvious that she could be at peace emotionally, and still feel terrible physically. I'll just ask but not push her too much about it, especially not while we're driving. "We don't have access to get any x-rays or MRIs done to make sure you're healing properly. Scanner back on the quinjet only told us injury types, nothing more detailed than that. If you had to rate how you're feeling now, can you do that?"
Wanda gave Nat an irritated look. Natasha knew how much she hated trying to answer that kind of question, and now was no different. "Much better than last week?" she offered. This was true, and at this point she was not even particularly trying to hide how she felt. I don't know how to explain that I still don't feel well at all, but I'm safe and I'm not so...disoriented anymore.
"I know you do, but can you try to be a bit more specific? Please. I just don't want you continuing to be in pain or anything healing poorly if we can help it."
Wanda didn't really understand why this mattered at this point, since it was not like anyone could instantly heal her even if they did have access to a hospital. All that would happen was a doctor would tell her she needed more rest and probably would say Nat and Clint had tended to her injuries just fine. And someone might tie her down or sedate her if she tried to get up, the idea of which genuinely scared her. "A three?"
"I don't believe you," Natasha told her instantly, giving Wanda a suspicious glance.
"Well, if ten is the worst pain I can imagine..." Wanda hadn't meant to be lying this time, but trying to give how she felt a number did not process correctly for her; she could imagine much, much worse than how she felt right now.
"Think of it as zero being you feel normal, there's no pain. Ten being the worst you've already felt, not whatever nasty things your imagination might dream up. Does that help?" Natasha knew quite well Wanda probably hadn't lied if she was thinking about it that way; she knew quite well how vivid Wanda's imagination could be and so she'd probably felt that really was the truth, however untrue it sounded.
Wanda closed her eyes and scooted a little further down in her seat, trying to concentrate on the soft hoodie against her skin, not the seatbelt or that she might be back there in the Raft again. "Like...six or seven, maybe?" I don't know. I don't know at all, because the hurt is...was...all twisted up in my head and I can't explain that part. When I'm happier, I don't feel nearly as bad somehow, even if it is literally the same pain. "I am not counting whatever is...wrong with my head," she added reluctantly, because if she tried to remotely explain that then nothing made sense at all.
Natasha didn't answer right away, partially wishing she had not asked, because it sounded like Wanda still felt awful and was just...ignoring it a lot fairly easily, and could be happy as long as she recognized she was safe and not alone. To be fair, Nat herself would do the same, but she did not want Wanda doing so, either. "Okay, then we'll try to fix that."
"But it is much better, really." I'm trying to be honest. I don't think we even can do anything else. Wanda looked down at her bad arm now, then at her friend, and then out the window again. A small smile flitted across her face. "I broke my wrist when we were eight. There was this...shell of a bombed building kids liked to dare each other to climb in. Pietro and I weren't supposed to...go in there."
"And you went in anyway."
Wanda nodded, her expression a little bittersweet now, though the story wasn't even something she disliked remembering now and was actually something she genuinely loved thinking about. "I told him we shouldn't, but I followed him anyway...like most of the time. We both fell when a beam broke, and Pietro landed right on top of me. He was okay other than skinned knees and elbows, so he thought I was being a baby for bawling." She giggled at the memory now, because her little eight-year-old self was kind of a baby. "We went home, and I think Pietro was more scared than me. He kept hugging me and calling me a crybaby, because he really, really wanted me to...be okay and not hurt, and we knew our parents didn't have money to deal with...anything serious."
Natasha initially thought this was a kind of strange memory to make Wanda happy, but it was very obvious this incident wasn't a bad memory for her now and she liked remembering it. Because she still had her whole family intact then, that's why. “And then..." Nat prompted quietly.
"Pietro and I tried to hide what happened, which obviously didn't work. He tore his jeans, my wrist was all swollen, and...yeah. We were stupid. I don't know what Papa did, but he...pulled money together somehow for a doctor. I had a red cast and Papa made Pietro stay in bed when I had to. He was pinging off the walls. Mama gave us tea, and I...I can remember Pietro hugging me constantly. He pretended he didn't, but he felt really bad, for convincing me to climb in that building." Wanda closed her eyes, trying to retreat back to that happy place in her head. My family was hungry for weeks after that, but we were together and I...don't remember Pietro or me really being that distraught over it. I had them with me, and the little food we did have, Mama always made stretch and be delicious. "I suppose that sounds like a...weird happy memory," she murmured now.
"Maybe at first, but I can understand why you'd like thinking about it now. It's normal kid mischief you got into, even if you and Pietro shouldn't have had to consider a bombed-out building normal, and you still had your whole family together then." Natasha hated knowing something like this was a cherished memory of Wanda's, because objectively there was a lot to unpack there: the neighborhood wrecked by bombs, two eight-year-olds trying to hide their shenanigans not so much because they didn't want to get in trouble but because they knew their parents didn't have money, the fact that an incident where she'd hurt herself and cried over it was a good memory to her.
"...Yeah. It's like a warm hug for my head," Wanda said, realizing how odd that must sound but not caring at the moment. I wish I could go back and be that silly little girl again, who bawled over a broken wrist and caused trouble with her twin. I miss Pietro, I still miss our parents, even now. "Anyway. At eight, I thought that was the worst pain I had ever felt. Little did I know."
Now Natasha was angry, realizing why Wanda had shared her precious memory now. Hurting her arm and being injured in general now had reminded her of it, and she was comparing her innocent little kid self crying then to her current self, someone far too used to being in pain at this point. "I'm sorry for everything that's happened to you since," she said quietly.
"It is not your fault. I...don't want you to be sorry," Wanda answered as quickly as she could. She slowly turned her gaze toward her friend again rather than out the window, resting her tired head against the seat. "I like that memory now. You all t-taking care of me now...reminds me of having a home again. That maybe I am still...me. So...thank you." Then she closed her eyes again and didn't say anything more. Wanda felt her phone vibrate and quickly checked her messages.
'No one was hurt at the motel, though the building caught fire. The culprits for the explosion have been apprehended and taken to the nearest police station. I am sorry I could not message you confirmation sooner. I hope you are safe. I will return to visit you as soon as I can.'
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"Mom! They're back!" Cooper called around nine a.m., peeking out a window. "Well. Just Wanda and Auntie Nat I think. I don't see Dad and the truck yet."
Natasha spotted Cooper and waved at him with a smile before turning her attention back to Wanda. Like when they'd left, the gravel driveway had scared her, and she had curled herself into a ball, little bits of scarlet crackling at her fingertips. "We can go inside now, no more car for now," Nat told her, making no comment about the magic since it was harmless and it did not matter if Wanda did that here. And, she has already dispelled it anyway, Natasha observed now.
O-K, Wanda signed, very, very relieved they were back, and so much sooner than she expected, too. Lila and Cooper came galloping out the door, and she smiled, happy to see the children again. Natasha gently carried her back inside and set her down at the little kitchen table near where Laura was making breakfast. "Thank you," she whispered yet again.
"Of course. I'm just going to grab our stuff. If you want to go somewhere else in the house before I'm done unloading, you ask Laura for help, okay?" Natasha knew Wanda really did feel at least a little bit better than a few days ago, but she still didn't want her trying to walk anywhere without help.
"Okay." Wanda knew she was not going to ask Laura for help, but she could be agreeable. Besides, it was nice to actually be sitting at the table and not feel completely miserable and shaky because she wasn't in bed. She did not feel fine, either, but it was fine to her when compared with a week ago, or even just days ago.
"Glad you two are back safe! Now we just have to wait on Clint. I see you and Nat did your hair," Laura commented. "It looks very nice. Much different but still suits you."
Wanda smiled and said a quiet thank-you. "I really like how it turned out too." And it feels so good to have something about me that I can actually...like the appearance of right now. That is probably ridiculous, but it's true. Somehow dyeing her hair had also made her feel like she had done something Pietro would be happy she'd done too, even if he would certainly tease her for it, and that also was a pleasant thought.
"Any breakfast requests?" Laura asked. "I'm making pancakes, but you don't have to have that."
Wanda shook her head. "That sounds good." I think I can eat pancakes okay now. The idea doesn't make me feel...sick any more, at least.
"Make smiley face ones, Mama," Lila requested. "Please."
"You and Auntie Nat were at that motel that got exploded, weren't you?" Cooper asked suddenly.
Wanda froze and glanced at Laura. Laura slapped a spatula on the counter. "Cooper, you were told not to watch the news," Laura said sharply.
"I wasn't!" Cooper protested. "I was looking to see if there were any good shows on and it was just on a channel as I went through them. It said The Vision was there and got a tip. I think Wanda's the secret tip. He has a great big crush on her."
Lila looked at Wanda curiously.
"That's what streaming and DVDs are for. Do not turn the regular TV on again. You're old enough to know better."
"Why does it matter since Lila and me know Dad, Auntie Nat, and Wanda have been here anyway? Those dumb guys that came by with Iron Man didn't even pay any attention to us. They just stomped around and left when they didn't find them." Cooper puffed out his chest and went on, "And if I did get asked about them I would say no I haven't seen them. We know how to keep secrets."
"It matters because the news isn't reporting fairly," Laura said simply. "It has nothing to do with you and Lila being able to keep a secret. But regardless, the fewer details you two have, the safer you will be. You know their job is dangerous anyway, and right now it has become ten times worse."
"But we want to help. If we don't know anything, how can we help?" Lila asked in her innocent little-girl manner.
"If you want to be Avengers when you are adults, that's one thing. Right now you help by being ordinary children. You are helping maintain a cover of sorts simply by being here."
The children still seemed mildly suspicious, but didn't protest further. When Nat returned, Lila pounced on her with a hug again, and Cooper did not exactly pounce, but still hopped up and gave her a hug. Wanda liked watching them, and she smiled a bit, feeling mostly relaxed. "Can I help fix breakfast?" she asked now.
"Wanda, you do not need to do that. Let me help Laura finish making it today," Natasha said firmly. "You can make us a meal another time. Right now I want you to sit there and rest, especially after the mess during the night and this morning." She took Laura outside the kitchen for a minute to give her a quick rundown of the night before without the children hearing it.
They returned to find Wanda still sitting at the table, but little Lila had climbed on her lap now and was eating a cheese stick. Both girls were clearly happy. "I told Lila not to," Cooper said in his best grown-up voice, "but they wouldn't listen."
Wanda knew Lila was sitting directly on some of the still-healing bruises on her legs, but she did not care one bit. If the little girl started bouncing on her or squishing her, she would have to tell Lila to get off, but this was okay. "I'm fine," Wanda said pointedly, "Lila isn't hurting me."
"She's sitting directly on bruises, Wanda. I've seen them, remember? They've faded quite a bit, but not healed yet," Nat said gently. "Lila, why don't you sit next to her, okay?"
"Okay," Lila agreed.
Wanda winced when Lila hopped off of her, but she didn't say anything. Lila sitting nearby was okay, and she was not being pushed away or excluded; Laura was not telling her kids to get away from the dangerous enhanced person. Natasha was tempted to make Wanda go back upstairs and lie down, but figured that would do more harm than good. She seemed content at the moment, and Nat knew if she took Wanda upstairs, then she would probably be upset again, which would not help her rest. "Can I...have some milk?" Wanda asked hesitantly, thinking it was silly that asking for that made her stomach jumpy. I'm safe. I can ask for something if I want to. Then she thought, the refrigerator is right there, I should get it myself, and she stood up slowly, keeping her good hand on the table for balance. "Never mind. I...I can get it."
Natasha gently pushed her back into her chair. "Not yet you can't. How are you planning to carry the drink if you have to hold on to something to stand?"
"I don't know. My magic?"
"Show me you can manipulate a cup and get some water right there from your chair then. If you are going to use your powers to get a drink, then you do not have to stand or walk to the refrigerator," Natasha pointed out. She took the cup of milk Laura handed her and slid that across the kitchen table to Wanda. "And you are not pouring or cooking anything until I see you have a drink without using a straw or a water bottle without spilling."
I am not a toddler, Wanda wanted to scream, but she didn't even feel angry with Natasha for ordering her like that; she was just frustrated with herself for still being shaky. She could sign easily enough, and picking up small things was mostly okay, but open drinks still felt a bit beyond her. Even when she and Nat had been counting that stupid money, she had knocked over a pile of bills a couple times, which annoyed her even though Natasha didn't even mention it, and let her fix it herself.
Wanda couldn't help wondering if the frustrating weakness and intermittent tremors were from all of the repeated shocks every single day, or being kept restrained for weeks. Probably both, she thought now, but I am here, I am safe, it's not happening anymore. It will go away. I hope. Pushing those thoughts aside, she slowly picked up the milk cup and took a sip. If the cup had been full, she would have spilled it, but it was only about half full and so it was fine. Two sips. Three. Wanda thought this was taking far too much concentration, because it was just a drink, but other than Nat giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze, no one was paying any attention that it was more difficult for her than it should be. She was grateful that nobody said a word about it, not even Cooper or Lila.
The pancakes (with smiley faces of banana eyes and bacon mouths) were delicious, and Wanda was delighted to realize she could swallow this food fine except for the bacon, which she gave to Cooper and Lila instead. She stayed quiet, watching the others and slowly nibbling at her own breakfast.
"You don't have to finish that," Laura told her after everyone else was done and Wanda still had about half her plate left. "If you still want it, take as long as you like, but you do not have to eat all of it. We can put it away for later, or I'm sure Cooper the bottomless pit will eat it. Don't make yourself sick trying to clear your plate."
Wanda looked down at the half-eaten breakfast, unsure how to explain that she was kind of full but still wanted the food because then later there might not be any, which was illogical because she knew darn well the vacation house's kitchen was full of food, there was still some in the stash of nonperishable supplies for later, and even if all of that somehow vanished, she had that stupid envelope of money to go buy more if necessary. Besides, not clearing one's plate was rude. Thinking about this now reminded her of last year when the others realized she had a bunch of nonperishable snacks hoarded in her room at the Compound. Tony had jokingly called her a hamster, which had pissed her off even though she knew he didn't mean any harm whatsoever, and called all of the Avengers dumb nicknames sometimes. Steve had immediately understood why she had done that in the first place and came to talk to her about himself growing up during the Great Depression, which had made her feel better. I should be honest. It's just Laura and Nat. They won't care. I want to have a little bit more, and save the rest," she said finally. "I like it, I promise, I just-"
"Wanda, you are not offending Nat or me by not finishing your food," Laura interrupted. "No one minds. Even if you weren't hurt, it doesn't matter at all. I know you hate wasting food. Saving for later isn't wasting it."
Natasha knew that right now it had less to do with worrying not finishing was rude and more to do with Wanda feeling like she had to eat all of whatever she was given because there might not be any more later. "Laura, we can clean up the kitchen," she offered.
Laura scooped little Nate out of his high chair and nodded. "Okay. If you two do want anything else, I'll be upstairs with the kids. Call me if you need me."
The second Laura was gone, Nat looked straight at Wanda and just said, "I know you know there is plenty of food in this house. Open the refrigerator."
Wanda frowned but moved to stand.
"No. Stay there and open the refrigerator door. I don't want you being on that ankle right now."
Wanda hesitated but did as she was told, a little tendril of red pulling the refrigerator door open smoothly. The refrigerator was, indeed, well stocked. She looked at Natasha questioningly and took another couple nibbles of pancake. "I...I'm done now, I think."
Natasha closed the fridge herself and then began clearing the table, rinsing the dishes and then putting them in the dishwasher. "Bring your empty cup over here to the sink. With your magic, not by getting up."
"I might drop it."
"It's plastic. It doesn't matter. You keep wanting to help clean up, so start with that." Natasha kept her voice nonchalant; she still wanted to just take Wanda upstairs and put her to bed, but she knew doing something first would probably help Wanda much more than trying to force her to rest whilst knowing there were things to clean up. It was no secret that Wanda hated feeling useless and not being able to do much, and Nat was hoping doing some small things might help her feel better.
Wanda looked at the cup, the sink, her friend, down at herself, and then back at the cup. I can do that just fine. I know I can. In a few seconds the plastic cup floated over to the sink and dropped into it lightly. Feeling strangely satisfied, she leaned back in her chair and glanced at Nat again.
"Okay, now see if you can rinse it off and stick it in the dishwasher while I put your leftovers away. Stop if any of this is hurting you, though. Please."
Somehow all of this made Wanda feel comfortable enough to just be a hundred percent honest, because again Natasha was very obviously concerned but not fussing over her, nor was she stuffing her aside back in the comfy bedroom upstairs. Wanda genuinely liked chilling there, but being allowed and included to help do something was better. "I think I need to lie down after this, but it isn't hurting my magic. I don't feel too awful right now, though."
Nat could tell this, again, was truthful on Wanda's part: Wanda was happy again for right now, but she didn't feel well, either. "We'll go straight upstairs then in a bit. Is doing that with your powers causing you any pain at all?"
Wanda was focused on manipulating the water now, her expression serious but not unhappy. She knew her hand was shaking again, but she realized it was not really affecting her control over her telekinesis much, either. The cup slowly tilted, pouring the water out, and she set it down inside the dishwasher with a small jerk. It doesn't hurt, exactly. It just feels...hesitant, like it doesn't want to let me yank any more than this free at once. "My arm aches, but I do not think it's because I'm using my power," she whispered, still trying to be honest but having no idea how to explain, either.
Natasha nodded. "All right, then that means you've just done too much this morning. Don't do anything else, please." She quickly wiped the table and counter before putting the last few dishes into the dishwasher and starting its cycle. "Ready to go upstairs?"
Wanda wanted to say no, because she was tired of making Nat take care of her, but she knew her friend did not mind doing so, and she really did want to go upstairs. "Okay." She reluctantly let herself be carried upstairs, but asked for Nat to put her down once they were just down the hall from the bedroom.
"Not now. Wait until later today so you can rest awhile first." Natasha knew if Wanda really, really wanted to, she could easily push her away, but she hoped Wanda would not do that, and she didn't, though she did look displeased about it. "I also called Clint while I was unloading our things and told him to stop at a Walgreens to find a crutch or something for you before he comes back. I know you really hate needing someone to help you go anywhere right now, and that was one thing we didn't have on the quinjet or in my Norway safe house."
Wanda frowned as Nat gently set her down on the edge of her bed. "Won't that be dangerous for us? Buying a thing like that in public?"
"If our group of rogue Avengers was together, then absolutely, but Clint alone will be fine. He doesn't stand out anyway, and he's driving that tired old truck Vision let him take that lends itself well to one man driving alone. He'll say he twisted an ankle hiking or fishing or something if asked, but I don't think anyone will."
"I don't want to put him or any of the rest of you in danger," Wanda said the same thing that was constantly concerning her yet again. I know Nat is right. Clint never gets recognized in public anyway, even before all of this. He is probably the one that's badmouthed on the news the least, even now. Good for him.
"Wanda, you need to just let us take care of you. You've done enough. It's okay to think of yourself once in awhile," Natasha told her.
"I'm even preventing you from seeing your sister." Wanda curled up on her side again, already feeling a little better now that she was lying down again. "You could just...leave me here and go visit Yelena y-yourself." I-M S-A-F-E.
Natasha put Wanda's bad ankle on a pillow and shook her head, sitting next to her. "No. At least not until you can take care of yourself without help. You barely want me to help you tend to those burns and everything else. Besides, I really do want you to meet her. We'll wait. Yelena will understand." Well, I hope she understands.!Nat knew Yelena would not be all that sympathetic if she knew they were on the run...but currently relaxing hidden away in a large vacation house. She would probably assume Wanda would be safe there without Nat's presence, and that Natasha should come visit without Wanda now and come back later with her.
"You are staying because I have emotional problems," Wanda said flatly, "not because I am unsafe here without you."
"Yes. But that is not your fault. Also, yes, you will be unsafe if I leave and it causes you to have more panic attacks."
"I don't want any more of those...things," Wanda mumbled, her cheeks slightly pink. "I'm sorry. I feel like...like my head is betraying me." Nat understands. She has even told me she's had them before. I shouldn't be embarrassed about it.
Natasha looked her straight in the eyes. "I know what they feel like. They are horrible. I'm not leaving you knowing not having me here will make it more likely for things to trigger you. Not an option. We'll wait a bit longer."
Notes:
I’m trying my best to show that Wanda really is getting better (a lot better), but that she still has a lot of healing to do, both magic-wise and her ordinary injuries, on top of the mental/emotional aspects of the whole thing. And I really wanted to address the way she processes and thinks about her own pain (like her telling Nat a three, because she can imagine much much worse). Of course, Nat knows this and tries to nip that in the bud immediately.
Yes, I fully plan to write out the memory from her little 8-year-old self that Wanda likes thinking about now that she tells Nat about as an actual one-shot. I have started but not finished it!
Any kudos/comments are much appreciated:)
Chapter 14: Chapter 14
Summary:
In which Wanda continues growing a bit stronger, she tries to help Clint feel better, and the vacation house trio must warn the other half of their rogue team about something.
Notes:
I wanted to give stubborn Clint a bit of attention this chapter. Since Wanda is feeling stronger, it’s easier for her to notice when something is wrong with her friends. While obviously she doesn’t really know how to help him feel better, she was trapped on the Raft with him. So yeah. I do not believe he (or their fellow teammates imprisoned there) would be totally fine after that, regardless of whether the others were physically harmed or not.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Clint showed up a little after noon, only a few minutes later than originally predicted. Laura greeted him at the door and immediately gave him a hug and a peck on the cheek. "You and the kids didn't have issues when this place got searched the other day?"
Laura shook her head. "Honestly, no. Tony showed up in his Iron Man suit with Vision and about ten strike team members I suppose Ross must've chosen. They did an extremely brief search of the house and asked in passing if we'd seen any of you. Obviously we said no. It seemed more like it was meant to be confirmation that you all weren't here than any serious suspicion on Ross's part about it. I do think he suspects Tony knows more than he's letting on, but not that he did any of the vacation house business as anything more than a favor for the kids and me. Ross did come himself, but he didn't come inside. He stayed holed up in some armored car aside from glancing around outside for a few seconds and ordering his men around."
Clint snorted. "Like an armored car would prevent Wanda from getting him if she was here and she wanted to. He better stay away from me too. I'll snipe him. Bet Nat would too."
"You will not. Killing that man won't fix anything."
"Who said anything about killing him? Nah, if he can just have even a sliver of the pain he caused Wanda-"
"Honey, stop it," Laura interrupted firmly. "She's okay. So is Nat. They're relaxing upstairs now. Cooper and Lila are playing Mouse Trap, though I think they just built the trap and are enjoying setting it off over and over, Nat's watching Nate for me, and Wanda is sleeping for a bit. Why don't you go see them and then come back and help me make us some lunch? We all decided we wanted to wait for you."
"...Fine." Clint hugged Laura again and added quietly, "Thanks for everything you're doing, putting up with our big ragtag family. The baby, two little kids, one bigger one, and Nat on top of just me. Forget the mess that caused all of this."
"I think if we're getting to stay for free in a vacation house that we'd never be able to afford all summer, we aren't doing too badly," Laura teased, "but I know what you mean. I won't pretend I'm comfortable with the situation, but it's not a problem and wouldn't be your fault even if it was."
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Clint sighed and climbed upstairs to find all of them in the bedroom exactly as Laura had described. Lila and Cooper were sitting on the floor playing with their board game. Nat was holding Nate in one arm and working on something on her laptop with the other. Wanda was resting propped up with pillows with two small cups of acorns sitting on a tray in her lap. Considering Bewitched was playing on the TV, Clint assumed Wanda had been watching TV and then fallen asleep, since he knew that was one of the old sitcom shows she liked. This did not explain the acorns, though. Still, he was happy to see that the bruises scattered over Wanda's face and arms had faded further over the last couple days, and she just appeared a bit healthier than before in general.
"Welcome back," Natasha greeted him.
"Daddy!" Lila shouted happily, and hopped up to give him a hug.
Wanda woke up with a jerk hearing Lila's shout, and instinctively put her hand to her neck, which made her spill some of the acorns. It's just Lila being happy. Nothing to be scared of here, she reminded herself quickly. She was not sure how long she had been asleep, but if Clint had arrived, it must be around lunchtime.
"You changed your hair," Clint said on impulse; then worried that Wanda might not have even wanted to dye her hair and merely felt she had to.
But Wanda smiled at him and nodded, and clearly she was genuinely happy about it. "Nat did it for me. At the motel. I really, really like how it turned out." She carefully set the cups back up and began putting the acorns back inside one by one.
"Looks nice. I'm glad you like it. Why the acorns?"
Wanda frowned a bit, unsure whether she wanted to explain to Clint, because he would inevitably be really concerned. He's going to find out eventually. I should just tell the truth. "I have...weird tremors when I try to do things too much, and it's frustrating. So I'm just...practicing moving small items one at a time. Lila and Cooper gathered the acorns for me."
Clint knew this had nothing to do with Wanda's magic at all. He had noticed her hand often shook when she signed things, but thought it had been because she was anxious. This sounded more like it was physical damage still left from the Raft. Those many electrical shocks combined with being restrained for weeks unable to move her hands, let alone use them for anything, had probably messed up her fine motor control somewhat. While he was glad Wanda was actively doing something to help herself recover that didn't seem to be stressing her out in any way, he hated that she felt she had to do that at all. Still, Clint was happy that she was talking much better; she sounded almost like her normal self. Not quite, but close. "Well, if you need help with anything, you'd better ask instead of insisting on doing it alone."
I'm trying to get better so I don't have to have help. Wanda still felt guilty that Natasha was not visiting her sister yet, and the faster she proved she could function on her own, then the sooner Nat would feel she could go see Yelena.
"Clint, considering that, again, we can't take her to any PT sessions, which we all know she would hate anyway and insist she could do the exercises on her own, doing something ourselves is smart," Natasha said firmly. "I didn't even have to suggest it. Wanda started doing that herself, and it's a good idea."
"Yeah, but she shouldn't have to."
"She is right here," Wanda put in, an ever so slight edge in her voice. "It doesn't matter if I should have to or not. I do have to, and I will." I can't really fix my head. I can help fix the outside of me, and I'll do whatever I can for at least that.
"Sorry, kid. I'm not trying to talk over you. I just hate seeing you hurt," Clint told her. "I'll stop. Brought you a crutch like Nat told me to pick up for you. I'm going to go help Laura make us all some lunch. You feel up to eating outside by the pool?"
"Actually...yeah. Yes, I am." Wanda felt refreshed by her nap after breakfast, and while she knew she would not be able to stay outside all afternoon, she didn't feel like she had to stay resting in bed to eat, either.I don't feel great, but I can at least do that. Clint's relieved expression made her all the more confident saying yes was the right thing to do. She watched in a contented silence as Clint asked to take baby Nate with him downstairs.
"Of course. Nate is your baby," Nat teased, but she gave baby Nate a very un-Nat-like (or was it?) kiss on the top of his head before handing him over. "He's fat and happy."
Wanda knew Natasha pretended not to be a particularly affectionate person much of the time, but privately she thought Nat was much the opposite. Natasha clearly enjoyed babysitting, and all of the understanding and loving care Nat willingly gave her said enough.
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Wanda had initially been looking forward to maybe being able to actually go where she wanted by herself since she had a crutch to use now, but she immediately found out it was not that simple. That fixed the balance issue entirely, but her good arm was still too weak to support her weight much when she tried. Nat had sent Lila and Cooper to play in one of their own rooms in case the experiment didn't go well and made Wanda upset, but Nat could tell Wanda was more angry than anything else. "Nat, you tried to get me something so I could function by myself, and I still can't," she muttered. "I'm sorry."
"I didn't say getting you a crutch was going to immediately fix everything. I told you it might not work yet before you tried," Natasha said gently. "There is no reason for you to be angry with yourself or apologize. It's there for you to use when you are strong enough. If that means not yet, that's fine."
"It's been, what...ten days since you got me out. I think." And I still am like this. I should be better, I should be stronger by now.
"Exactly. Only ten days. You are leaps and bounds better than ten days ago." Nat tried to push the mental picture out of her head of both initially finding Wanda on the Raft, and the photos she and Wanda had snapped back at the motel to catalogue Wanda's injuries for evidence purposes, which was what she'd been organizing on the laptop a bit ago. Natasha had seen plenty of bad things in her life, and objectively those pictures were nowhere near the worst things she'd seen. They were graphic in a clinical sort of way, sure, but it was also obvious the injuries had healed some before being photographed, and that the victim was receiving appropriate treatment. There was no reason the pictures should bother her at this point. Wanda was right in front of her, safe; no one was harming her any further. "I think I have an idea to help you, not necessarily carry, at least aside from the stairs."
"Okay." Wanda still sounded a bit grumpy, but that sounded reasonable to her. "What's the idea?"
"You're able to use at least a little of your magic now without pain, and you can use your power to levitate yourself. Can you channel a small enough amount to make it so you're not actually floating and just use it to support however much weight your arm can't take physically right now?"
Wanda considered this for a minute, thinking that probably would work just fine. It feels weird to think about though. I'm still too weak to do much of anything, but my magic isn't. Even without it functioning normally, I can still do "little" things with it. She remembered using it to knock Clint flat on the floor days ago when he'd asked her to see if she could punch him, and while doing that had hurt then, she didn't think it would now, or at least not much. "I think so. I will try," she announced.
Natasha was delighted to see that yes, it did work for her. Wanda's good hand remained visibly hazed in scarlet where she held her crutch, so this would never work in public at all, but as long as they were hidden somewhere like at the vacation house, it would. And she's already looking happier. Good. Nat stayed next to Wanda just in case, but the younger girl was able to cross the bedroom to the hallway door and back again fairly easily, if slowly. "How's your ankle feeling? And be honest, please."
"Better. It still aches, but this isn't hurting it." Wanda shyly asked if it was okay to give Nat a hug, and instantly wrapped her arm around her friend upon receiving a 'yes, obviously' reaction. Thank you so much.
Nat did let Wanda get down the hallway on her own, but she quickly picked Wanda up before she could attempt the stairs. "No stairs yet. I don't think that's a good idea."
Wanda kept quiet, slightly annoyed but knowing Nat was right. Maybe she could go in the pool soon; doing that might help too. Relying on her enhancements to allow her to limp anywhere meant she was still stuck if they did have to leave again. Still, she felt so relieved to be able to move a bit from place to place on her own that she couldn't bring herself to care right now. "Do you think the pool would help...?"
"I do. You know quite well that will help already, Wanda," Nat told her in a slightly scolding tone. "I don't think it's a good idea to go in all the way to actually swim yet with those burns still like they are, but you could at least go walk the shallow end if you're careful."
"I think I'd like to try." Wanda was glad Nat set her down gently at the bottom of the stairs without her even having to ask. Natasha did stay right next to her just in case, but Wanda didn't mind that.
They made it almost to the kitchen before Wanda's good leg gave out under her. The walls tilted briefly, reminiscent of when she had fainted in that Raft cell and hurt her ankle in the first place, and she squeezed her eyes shut, the crutch clattering to the floor. I'm not there. I have Nat right here with me. She's holding me. She didn't even let me fall. I have access to my magic, too. And I'm not hungry and dehydrated, either, so there.
Natasha carefully lowered Wanda to the hallway runner rug and sat next to her, just holding her close. Too much, too soon. I should have stopped her sooner, but I really thought she was okay. Wanda only seemed a little tense, so she said nothing and let Wanda calm herself down instead.
"I'm so sorry. I thought I could do it," Wanda whispered after a moment.
"There is absolutely nothing to be sorry for. That's what I was there for. I should have made you stop sooner, but you genuinely seemed fine. Now we know what is too much for now." Nat was glad Wanda did not seem particularly distressed, just frustrated. This wasn't a good thing, of course, but Wanda being frustrated with herself after getting hurt was normal behavior for her, and Nat would always be glad to see more normal behavior from her right now. "Do you still want to go outside?"
Wanda nodded. I can't get there by myself though. I'm supposed to be better, so Nat can go see her sister. Then another thought she knew was selfish and unfair floated through her head, too: I am nothing but a second-rate replacement. She won't be around any more. “No, no, no, that is wrong, I'm just-"
"Wanda, what is worrying you right now?"
Everything. Wanda didn't know how to explain what was bothering her; she still genuinely wanted her friend to be able to see her little sister. But the scared little girl part of her couldn't help worrying that Nat reuniting with her actual sister meant she would be abandoned and left behind somehow, and that in of itself seemed embarrassing. She wasn't a little kid, and that logic was objectively childish. Natasha could care about more than one person at a time. Feeling otherwise was dumb. I have told Nat to leave me behind, because I make things difficult and ruin things anyway. I just...I'm selfish too. I don't...want her to. Even if I really think she should and that I don't deserve to have a friend like her. And what would Natasha's sister think anyway, that Nat had been staying away to help care for some injured enhanced girl she'd only known for about a year, after barely having the chance to reunite with her actual sibling again at all? Wanda suddenly wanted to ask to just go back upstairs, but if she did that, then Clint would be all concerned and fussy. She needed to pull herself together. "I am okay. I'm just...thinking," she said finally.
Unconvinced, Natasha looked at her suspiciously, but decided not to press at the moment. "If you don't want to talk to me, that's fine, but then you need to talk to someone else." She sensed that something had closed off for Wanda, something that the younger girl didn't know how to express. It was written all over her face, even if Wanda was clearly trying to appear unbothered.
"I can't." That isn't something I can tell anyone. I should not mention anything regarding any of it to anyone, because Nat having a sister isn't my story to share. I won't mess that up for her if it's a secret.
Natasha frowned, not liking that Wanda had abruptly pulled away, burying her face in her knees. "I know something is wrong. You even acknowledged something was bothering you because you said 'I can't', not another 'I'm fine'."
I'm terrified of being left alone and I know it's illogical but I can't help it. "I am just tired," Wanda hedged, hoping Nat would drop it.
"Do you want to go back upstairs?"
"No."
____________________
Wanda did let herself participate in having lunch by the pool, but she felt as if some shadow had fallen over her. Luckily not being talkative wasn't strange on her part, so the only one still suspicious was Nat, who was nice enough not to press about it. Lila and Cooper had already stuffed their peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in and hopped in the pool, so she just sat on the edge with her feet in the water, still nibbling her own sandwich. Laura handed Nate to Clint and carried some of the empty lunch dishes inside, asking Natasha for help.
The second they were in the kitchen, Laura plopped the dishes in the sink and turned on the Black Widow. "Something is wrong between you and Wanda, and you're both hiding it from Clint," she stated.
Nay smiled ruefully and shook her head. "Should have guessed you would notice. Guess my poker face is rusty."
"Spill it. I understand why neither of you want to tell him, so maybe I can help?"
"Something is deeply worrying her, but she won't say what it is. I don't understand why when she's confided some...terrible things that happened to her on the Raft without me even pressing her to explain." Natasha began rinsing the dishes slowly, trying to consider what could possibly have set Wanda off. "I know she's frustrated with her body still failing her right now, but there is no way that is what made her close off somewhat so suddenly. I don't think whatever is bothering her has anything to do with that prison ordeal at all."
"Nat, does Wanda know about your sister?" Laura asked. "That she exists, at least? You mentioned to me before that she wanted you to visit and to please not tell her or Clint about it."
"She does. It came up at the motel, and being cagey would have been far worse than just telling her. She was very, very hung up on my going to visit Yelena as soon as possible. I told her no, she needed to heal more first, and I wanted the two of them to meet anyway."
Laura raised one eyebrow. "And, they are pretty close in age, correct?"
"Yes. Yelena is a little older, but not by much."
"Nat, use those super spy senses of yours and put the pieces together. Think about it."
"You think Wanda doesn't want me to see Yelena? No, no way. She wouldn't do that..." Natasha trailed off, realizing Laura did have a point. Even Yelena had already expressed an issue with Wanda over text, not meanly, but an issue all the same. Those two girls probably each thought that the other was going to take someone they loved away from them, even if they logically knew otherwise. Wanda had used the phrase I want you to be able to see your real sister back at the motel. At the time, it had sounded sweet and caring, but now Natasha was quite sure there was a thread of something else there, something disparaging herself. Yelena accused Nat of replacing Yelena with Wanda and flat-out called her a replacement, and Wanda must think she was just that, something to discard in favor of the original.
"I'm saying she's hurting and doesn't have any of her biological family left. She's attached to you, anyone can see that, and now she finds out you have a long-lost sister. She's probably terrified of being abandoned and won't say so." Laura paused, knowing none of this was pleasant to discuss at all, and the plastic cup in Natasha's hand was buckling as she squeezed it.
"I pretty much did abandon her. For three weeks. No wonder she might be scared of that, even if she kept telling me repeatedly to leave her somewhere because her presence makes it difficult to hide." Nat shoved the rinsed dishes into the dishwasher and slammed the door.
"Because she cares about you more than her own fears. You didn't abandon her, and same as I told Clint, nothing that happened in that prison was your fault. You need to get your needy little siblings together and show them that the other one's existence doesn't mean you care about them any less." Laura gave her a hug and added, "For the record, I don't think this needs to be an issue. Perhaps arrange a visit and come right back. Yelena will be mollified because she gets to see you, and you returning will help Wanda see that she doesn't need to be scared of losing you."
"I can't leave her yet. I know, logically, there was no way I could have extracted her from Leipzig alone. But honestly? I let the team down by signing in the first place. It really does feel like I just let her be tortured for weeks to save my own skin."
"Nat, you know you had no way of knowing what Ross would do to her. If she, Clint, Sam, and Scott were treated fairly, waiting nineteen days to be rescued would not have been a big deal," Laura said quietly. "They may have been a little hungry, bored, and tired, but not harmed."
Natasha clenched her hands into fists. Maybe not to the extent it was, but I certainly knew she would be mistreated. "Ross is a prejudiced asshole. His being involved automatically meant she'd be hurt. He was always rude to her before; me too, just not as...much, since I am not enhanced like Wanda. Couple of foreign female Avengers just offend his fragile senses, I suppose."
"Then, put that way, your options were interfere with their arrest alone in the airport and get you two killed, or wait knowing she'd be hurt and rescue her successfully later. Knowing that doesn't mean you did the wrong thing."
"Doesn't make it easier. Honestly? I'd love to eliminate every single person that participated in what happened to her in that place. Use my Red Room assassin training on people that would one hundred percent deserve it."
____________________
Wanda easily sensed that Laura had known something was not quite right between Nat and her, more because she knew Laura did not actually need help with the dishes than their body language or her powers sensing something. She blinked down at the last bit of sandwich, thinking that if she ate any more, she would probably feel sick. Lila and Cooper were splashing around in the deep end of the pool, clearly far more confident swimmers than she was, even if she wasn't injured. Clint came over and plunked himself down beside her, offering a content-looking baby Nate. "I can't hold him."
"Eh. You supported yourself walking a little, and I think you weigh more than a baby," Clint teased, but he didn't ask why Wanda said she couldn't hold him.
Wanda smiled slightly and hesitantly reached for Nate's pudgy little baby hand, wondering if little Nathaniel Pietro Barton looked anything like she and Pietro did when they were babies. Well. He's probably much fatter than we were, she thought, knowing both Pietro and herself had been scrawny little things as far back as she could remember. Nate squeezed her finger and then babbled happily, which strangely made her feel better. Nate was just a baby; he didn't talk other than 'mama' and 'dada', but he still seemed happy to interact with her. "You're very, very lucky, Nathaniel Pietro," she whispered. Wanda felt an arm around her own shoulders and scooted herself closer. And despite everything, maybe I am too. Lucky I'm not completely alone. Lucky that place didn't completely...break me. Pietro, can you see me now? I still miss you, but I'm...me, I think. I am coping. I didn't try again after the once last year, at least. I am hurt, but I'm getting better.
You're still scared of losing your friends like you lost me. Don't be.
I can't help it. I never wanted this job-I just wanted peace, quiet, home, family, normal. But you did and so I do too. And now you are not here and I still am, so I have to keep going for both of us. Wanda thought her deepest wish was just plain selfish at this point. Even if she wasn't labeled an international fugitive and felt she could actually trust her enhancements, didn't she have a responsibility to use those abilities to help others? Thinking about that made her wonder what the other half of their rogue team was up to. "Have you talked to Steve, Scott, or Sam?"
"No, but I know Nat can get into contact with them if you want to."
"And you don't?"
"Right now? Not really. Bit pissed at Steve, and Sam and Scott are reminders of what happened."
Wanda tensed, wondering if she should go away too then. Clint is upset, way more upset than he's been letting on, even with his snapping and being overly concerned. “If they are reminders...seeing me like this should be much worse."
"Maybe, but I'm glad you're here anyway. I'd rather be able to see you for myself and confirm you're safe." Clint was glad Wanda seemed to be okay for now. Seeing her outdoors sitting in the sun and finishing an ordinary lunch without help made him feel better.
Wanda instinctively jerked herself away when little Nate tugged on her hair. In a second she had slipped into the pool with a splash, and that startled her enough to realize that the water was shallow enough that she could stand here just fine. She did not need to be scared of drowning or passing out or someone injecting drugs into her neck again. I'm fine. I'm fine. It was just Nate, nothing else. “Nat is going to be mad at me," she muttered.
"Wanda, are you okay?"
Wanda glanced at Clint, splashing down the pool steps and still holding the baby. "I'm fine, really, I just...Nate pulled my hair. It startled me," she admitted.
"Yay, you came in too!" Lila said happily, trying to tug Wanda by the hand into deeper water.
"Lila, let go of her," Clint ordered. "You want to play with her, ask first, and don't get her neck underwater, okay?" He could tell Wanda really was safe for now and hadn't hurt herself, but he hated that little Nate pulling her hair was all it took for her to be startled enough to scoot off the edge into the pool.
Lila seemed to understand, and stopped pulling while still holding onto her. "Okay. Will you play with me?"
Wanda knew the water wasn't even chest-high for her, and the children obviously swam like fish, so they were not in any danger either. "I...I think I just want to stand here for a bit. I'm sorry."
Lila nodded and made her serious face. "Okay. You're not s'posed to say sorry for politely saying you do or don't want to do something," she said, blinking innocently.
This made Wanda smile, and she nodded. "I know." Thanks, Lila. I do know that.
It was so nice to just be standing by herself and not feel like she was going to collapse that Wanda just stayed put watching the children until Nat and Laura returned. Besides, the cool water felt nice on her sensitive fingers. Rather than being upset with her, Nat actually looked happy. "Mind if I join you?"
Wanda shook her head, still wondering if she should tell Natasha what had bothered her earlier. Then she grew more surprised when her friend went straight to the point, asking if what was bothering her had anything to do with Yelena. "Not...exactly." I should be honest, but make it clear clear clear that I know I'm being ridiculous.
Natasha looked like she was thinking 'I knew it', which she probably was, Wanda thought. "You're not some replacement for her, you know," she said gently. "I can care about both of you. It is not a one or the other thing."
"I know." I'm just still scared anyway. Wanda ran her fingers along the edge of the pool, wondering if Laura had suggested the idea to Nat, or if Nat had realized what was wrong on her own. "I still think you should go visit. I just...don't want you to leave. But...you really, really should. It is not fair to Yelena at all." Nat didn't get to see her sister for years and years, since they were kids. She's only just found Yelena again and I have no right to want her to stay. And if I was Yelena, I don't think I'd want Nat to automatically bring me along, either. I think if I feel like this, it...must be much worse for her. She should get to...have you to herself a bit."
Natasha thought about Wanda's words for a couple minutes, mostly just relieved to have an explanation. Wanda did have a point, but Nat still did not feel comfortable leaving her yet. Yelena was safe right now, at least, and...so was Wanda, really. No one was going to harm her more, and Clint and Laura would certainly take care of her if Nat left for a day or two. Still, she was hesitant to leave all the same. "I'm going to wait until we actually straighten out Scott's deal and Tony drops by here so we can discuss things. At that point, I will go visit Yelena briefly if she doesn't mind, and if you're recovered enough to travel easily by then, you are more than welcome to come," she said finally.
Wanda didn't smile, but she nodded. This seemed reasonable to her, though she had no wish to speak to Tony in person and planned to stay away from him if possible.
____________________
The next couple days passed peacefully with the little group simply staying indoors and hanging out together as a major rainstorm rolled through the area. While Wanda initially worried the storm would set her off somehow with all the noise, she found herself contentedly watching the storm through the living room windows whilst resting wrapped up in a warm fuzzy blanket on the rather questionably-printed flowered sofa. Clint had joked that Tony should redecorate, which amused her.
"You want more hot chocolate?" Clint asked now, on the second indoor rainy day.
Wanda shook her head, slowly and carefully setting the empty cup on the coffee table. Since it was not thundering for now, Nat had decided to go for a run up and down the long winding gravel driveway despite the rain, and Laura unsuccessfully tried to convince Clint to go too. Wanda rather wished she was strong enough to do that herself, but that was definitely not happening right now. "You should have gone with Nat. I'd be perfectly fine," she whispered, knowing Laura would be willing to stay with her anyway, so she wouldn't be alone regardless.
"Nah, that's not fair to you since you can't yet."
"I don't need my enhancements to sense y-you're...punishing yourself. Because of what happened to me." Wanda thought for a moment and then stood up, leaning on her crutch. If I say I want to go outside then he will have to, also. “I want to take a walk outside." So if you want to stay with me, then you have to come too.
Clint stared at her, knowing quite well what she was up to. "I don't think that's a good-"
"Come with me, then." Wanda felt confident she could at least get out the door alone; Nat's idea to use her magic to help herself a bit was very helpful, and it was nice to know that she was helping her magic slowly improve along with her body slowly recovering strength. "I will go outside alone if you don't come."
Clint sighed and followed her. "You're going to hurt yourself overdoing things. I don't want you aggravating your injuries further."
Wanda's green eyes sparkled with a hint of mischief. "Better come stop me then," she said, appearing quite unbothered. "But, I will stay put and rest. If you go outside yourself." Please? I don't know how to help, but I know very well that staying inside all the time is bad for him, especially when I'm very sure he's doing so just because I can't do much. I'm much better, but still not...good, either. Wanda still had not tried the stairs, but she was mostly okay moving about the house otherwise now, as long as she didn't try to do too much at once.
Clint frowned, glad Wanda was pulling a stunt like this trying to make him go outside and that she clearly felt fine emotionally at the moment-her eyes said that much-but he still didn't feel like he should go off and do something she probably wanted to do and couldn't at the moment. "Okay, let's go outside, but you stay under the little porch awning so you don't get soaking wet," he said finally. "Laura! I'm going outside with Wanda, okay?" Clint shouted upstairs.
Wanda flinched at the shouting but didn't react further. She could hear Laura saying, "Good, I'm glad someone convinced you," which made her smile.
"Still don't want you overdoing it or getting a chill," Clint muttered, grabbing an extra throw blanket off the living room sofa.
"I'm already wearing a hoodie. I am fine," Wanda informed him, but she didn't fuss at him gently wrapping the plush blanket around her shoulders, either. I have been getting cold easily...I don't know why. She could tell he was still worried anyway as they went outside, because he seemed fidgety, and not in the same sort of normal way Pietro used to be. Pietro was always bouncy and physically fidgety whether he was happy or not. In fact, it was when he wasn't fidgety that she would get concerned. Clint was not like that; he was normally a pretty calm, chill person in general. This is my fault. I know Clint, Nat, and Laura don't think that, but it is. "I think I hurt you by...talking to you in my head, on the Raft," she said slowly, struggling to find the correct words. "And I think...you need help too."
"I'm fine, I wasn't the one being tortured every day, and I've had training to deal with enhanced interrogations anyway."
"But, that isn't right either. You care about me. So that hurt y-you too. I think..." Wanda paused, watching raindrops plink into the large puddles dotting the driveway. How can I possibly help when I'm a mess myself? I have to try. "I think you are hurting. And you are not taking care of you. You help me only and not you."
"Well, I hardly think that hellhole was half as bad for the rest of us," Clint said, sounding a touch peevish, "and I'm not hurt, so there is nothing to take care of."
Wanda blinked, knowing she probably should sit back down somewhere soon, but not willing to do so when she was still trying to convince Clint to go running for himself instead of staying with her. "Me being hurt doesn't mean you were not. Doesn't matter if it was...as bad or not." I'm just imagining when I saw Pietro hurt before. I always thought I'd so much rather it be me than him. And I know he thought the exact same thing.
"I think I'm fine. I just need to take care of all of you now and it won't matter." Clint glanced at Wanda, still wondering if she was stressing her still-healing body by standing outside for this long, but she seemed okay other than leaning on him a bit. "I've had training for dealing with this and I have been tortured before."
Now Wanda tensed as she struggled to figure out what to say to that. I have no idea how to help. What am I even doing? I can't help someone else when I can't really help myself. "You s-said 'before', so you know it happened again, then," she whispered finally. "And I don't have any training for that, but I...I'm not sure that is...helpful, anyway. Other than increasing pain tolerance maybe." Which wouldn't help him in this case regardless.
"I hardly think some shoves and slaps is torture. You took all the brunt of the crap that went down in that place."
"And I messed up...accidentally making you feel mypain. So, yes, you did get physically hurt. Indirectly." And it's my fault. Wanda frowned and moved to the little porch swing finally, not trusting herself to stand much longer. She was glad Clint had insisted on wrapping her in a blanket, because she did feel a bit chilly, and being cold reminded her of a lot of things she did not want to think about, not just being trapped in that Raft cell.
Clint came and sat next to her, still frowning. "You're still blaming yourself about that, aren't you?"
"It's a fact. You, um..." Wanda closed her eyes and then just stared down at her bare toes. The cement porch felt damp and a bit rough, but she liked sensing something on her feet besides prison slippers (which had somehow gotten lost at some point during the failed escape attempt and were never replaced), the freezing smooth floor in her cell, or the brace wrapped around her bad ankle. Still, she pulled her legs up on the swing too and tucked herself into the blanket entirely. I don't know what to say. If Nat and Laura couldn't help, why would I be able to? Wanda thought about Nat, offering help and understanding by expressing something similar that had happened to her. Natasha always helped. "That prison was using me to hurt you, exactly like Hydra liked...using Pietro's safety against me, a-and the other way around, too. So I know you need help. And I'm a telepath. I can sense it passively without trying."
Clint sighed and ran a hand through his hair in frustration. She's not exactly wrong. "You two were kids. I'm a grown-ass person responsible for protecting you." While Wanda did not talk a whole lot about her own experiences with Hydra before, he knew that whatever had been done to her and her twin while being experimented on was torture itself. The few times he had glimpsed a bit of those old scars on her back that she kept covered constantly said that much. Knowing that also made him angry.
"Okay, you just acknowledged you aren't okay then." And you're not responsible for protecting me, even if that makes me feel like I still have a family.
"And what do you prescribe, Dr. Maximoff?"
This made Wanda smile a bit, even though she hated being around doctors with a passion. "I think you should go running with Nat, or alone, if that is better."
"You want to do that yourself, I can tell that much, and you can't," Clint muttered.
Why does that matter? “I do, but that...that doesn't mean I can't be happy here resting. I am okay, I'm just...not strong enough yet." Wanda perked up when she saw Nat running back toward them. "I think Nat will agree. Nat, he should go run, too, shouldn't he?"
Nat was glad to see both of her teammates outside, but quite sure Wanda had only come outside in the chilly rain because she'd been trying to convince Clint to go do something active outdoors for himself. When she'd left, Wanda had been very content watching the rain from inside sipping hot chocolate under a blanket. "She's right, Clint. Laura said the same thing. I'm doing two more driveway laps. Why don't you come along?"
"Well..."
"Perfect, I shall go back inside now," Wanda said quickly. Debating was close enough; she knew both of her friends well enough to know that Nat would make Clint go. Mission accomplished.
__________________
Wanda settled herself back in her spot looking out the living room window, first realizing that she didn't particularly want to be alone at the moment, and then thinking that was ridiculous. She could hear Laura coming downstairs and two pairs of thumping feet anyway. Lila and Cooper were wearing rain boots and coats and eagerly shouted hello before barreling toward the door.
"Kids. Wait, please," Laura ordered. "You may play in the rain as long as you like, but do not go past the hammock hung between those two trees along the first bend in the driveway, understand?"
Lila and Cooper nodded. "We know. That's always the rule," Cooper pointed out.
"I know you do. Just a reminder. I'll be here with Nate and Wanda." Once the children went outside, Laura went back into the living room carrying Nate and asked Wanda if she wanted anything at the moment.
"No thank you." Wanda sounded happy, and she remained curled up on the sofa where she was. I do not feel...great, but I really do feel better today too. It was annoying that she kept tiring so easily, but that was better than constantly being in so much pain that she didn't particularly want to move. Right now she could ignore it.
"I'm glad you convinced Clint to get out of the house and do something. Thank you."
"He shouldn't still blame himself for me being hurt. I'm not sure I helped much...but I tried."
"You convinced him to go running, so I count that as a win," Laura pointed out. She did not say so, but she knew Clint wasn't exactly his normal self. More than once she woke up during the night to Clint hugging her tightly and muttering that they should have just all stayed on the farm last year, period. Except, then when she actually tried to get him to talk, he would go silent, give her a kiss, and tell her to go back to sleep. "You're absolutely sure I can't get you anything?"
Wanda nodded. "I'm honestly fine right now. I like watching the rain." Even just hearing the raindrops patter against the windows was nice, and the cinnamon-scented candle lit on the marble coffee table made the ambience cozier. Though there was still a long list of things that deeply bothered her, at the moment that was muted and she was happy right now.
"All right. I'm just going to sit here and watch the rain with you, then."
Wanda smiled a little and scrunched herself further into the blanket. "Thank you for staying with me."
In a couple minutes, Wanda felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and fumbled to pull it out. It's Vis. I will pick up, definitely. She showed the screen to Laura and then answered it. "Hello, Vis."
"Hey, I know I'm not who you wanted to-"
Tony. Wanda scowled and nearly hung up, but something in Iron Man's voice made her pause. She could also hear Vision in the background saying he had told Tony he should have answered first. Something had to be very wrong. "Why are you on Vision's phone?" she asked cautiously.
"Because you wouldn't pick up if it wasn't him. Listen carefully. You need to get in contact with the Capsicle half of your rogue team, now. Tell them get out of Romanoff's safe house in Norway ASAP."
"They are not in Norway," Wanda said flatly, still suspicious.
There was a deep sigh on the other end of the line. "Fine, be like that. Tell them get out of not-Norway then." Tony quoted the exact location of Nat's safe house as proof that he was not just fishing for information and already knew.
Wanda bit her lip and glanced at Laura, awkwardly stabbing at the phone to get the call on speaker. Is this a setup? What's going on?
"Little Red, you listening? Falcon's been sighted by locals there, which could be easily ignored as rumors, but some hikers stumbled on the quinjet. You need to get word to them and tell them get out, now."
Laura gave a start hearing the call, and moved closer to Wanda. "Tony, this is Laura Barton. I'm here with Wanda. Do we need to leave the house here also?"
"No, you guys are safe. But the rest aren't. Ross is hella pissed and he's out for blood. You've got maybe an hour before shit goes down. Couldn't get word to you sooner. I'll explain later." Tony paused before adding, "Wanda, I do have a plan, but you aren't going to like it."
Wanda closed her eyes, knowing her hand was shaking badly, but she spoke clearly. "What is it? I can't exactly...do much right now." I need to calm down. Not sound like I'm about to panic. Stop, stop, stop.
"Vision's made it so your phone can't be traced. I can give you a phone number and I want you to call it. Tell Ross-"
Is he crazy? “I am not talking to that man," Wanda interrupted, her voice sharp. "Are you out of your mind?" She looked up at Laura desperately, wishing that Nat or Clint was back already.
"Gimme a second here. I said you weren't going to like it!"
Not liking is a little different than trying to get me to talk to the same person that had me tortured for weeks, Wanda thought, but she didn't say that. "Why would I do that?" Then she closed her eyes and quickly sent a telepathic emergency message to Clint, "Please tell Nat I need her to get back as quickly as possible. We need to contact Steve, Sam, and Scott immediately. Emergency. They need to leave Nat's safe house."
"Because I think you can convince him he should help bug boy go home on house arrest so he can see his kid. Dude is terrified of you. You do this and nobody will have to use the prison footage you guys have. Besides, he'll be distracted talking to you and give more time for them to leave the area."
Wanda squeezed her eyes shut more tightly and curled herself into a smaller ball, trying to focus on the texture of her fuzzy blanket, the sounds of the rain outside, and the scent of the cinnamon candle. I won't be able to talk to Ross in any kind of reasonable manner right now. I'd either break down in a panic or just sound like an angry unhinged nutcase. I hate him.
"Wanda, forget the rest for now," Vision was saying in his gentle voice. "That can be discussed and solved another day. You do not have to do any such thing. Merely warn Mr. Rogers and the others to vacate their current location, that is all." I do not wish for her to do that regardless.
Wanda nodded, forgetting that they could not actually see her, and dropped her phone. She could hear Vision in the background saying it was unreasonable to expect her to be comfortable 'conversing with the main perpetrator of the human rights crimes committed against her', and then Tony saying that he knew that but it would be an easy fix for the problem, which admittedly was true. And...I could literally just mind-control Ross. I'd have to see him to do that, but I know I could. Would that really be so wrong if I was helping someone else?
Laura quickly jumped in and just said they understood and thank you for the warning. She gently squeezed Wanda's shoulder. "Did you warn them yourself in your head or do I need to grab Nat's laptop?"
T-O-L-D C-L-I-N-T. "I...can't reach the others. Too far away," Wanda told her, and was surprised when Laura carefully set Nate on her lap. "I can't-"
"Yes, you can. You don't have to carry twenty pounds of baby around. He's just going to sit there nestled against you and the sofa. Nate likes you, see?" Laura was glad to see that little Nate was content with Wanda; he was making happy noises and showing her the rubbery teething toy rattle in his hand. "If he gets wiggly and too much to handle, you can put him in his playpen with your magic. Tony, we're working on it. Give Wanda the phone number so we at least have it."
Wanda blinked in surprise as Laura ran out in search of the laptop. Why is Laura trusting me with her baby? And telling me I should use my magic to pick him up if I have to? Laura definitely would not leave her baby with someone she did not trust, and knowing that was the case felt reassuring to her. Laura did not think she was going to mess up again and hurt Nate. She was even directly telling her to literally use magic to hold him if she had to.
"Hey. Little witch, you listen. I've got the number here."
"You cannot expect Wanda to do this," she heard Vis insist again. "It is not fair to her."
The phone fell to the floor as Wanda tried and failed to get her hand to stop shaking. Little Nate was just happily resting on her, his pudgy baby fingers touching the splint on her injured arm curiously. Nate was warm. Nate did not care if her heart was racing and her thoughts all scared and confused. She squeezed her eyes shut and buried her face in the baby's messy dark curls. I'm okay. I'm safe. I need to get it together.
"Got your message," Clint said, running inside. "You sense something or did Vision tell you?" He spotted the phone on the floor and picked it up. "Are you okay?"
Natasha didn't even pause-she stuck her head in the living room, waved, and headed for the stairs.
Wanda nodded, still clutching the baby as much as she could. Nate wiggled but didn't try to get away from her. "Vis...Tony, I...Get the phone number. Get the dumb phone number, please." I can't do this myself.
"Hey. Wanda says I'm supposed to get a phone number." Clint scowled. "The hell? You want her to call Ross?" Well, that explained why Wanda was so shaky and upset. Clint began pacing the living room and then kicked the coffee table.
"Mr. Barton, Wanda asked to merely have the phone number for now. We do not expect her to do that," Vision said calmly. He quickly gave them the unwanted number, and then added, "Wanda, you are safe now. Should you change your mind for Mr. Stark's idea, the secretary cannot hurt you any longer."
I know. I know, I'm just...still scared anyway. And angry. I hate that man. Wanda didn't reply, and she could hear Vision asking Clint if she was okay.
"No, you two bumbling idiots scared her," Clint said rather snippily, and continued pacing.
"I am fine." Wanda spoke up now, not wanting Vis to be wherever he was and remain worried she was not okay. "Good-bye, Vis."
Clint took this to mean he should hang up, so he ended the call. "Why did you let them talk you into taking that number?"
Wanda let him take Nate from her and stood up as quickly as she could. "Because he has a point. Ross hates me. He's also...scared of me." She shakily went over to the window, still using her crutch. Looking outside was helpful. The little rivulets of raindrops trickling down the window. Cooper and Lila stomping in puddles. Leaves on the trees rustling a bit in the breeze. Calm down. I need to think.
Currently her theory was that Tony had known the specific coordinates to Natasha's safe house in Norway all the time, and had ever so helpfully shared them with Ross after the Sam sighting and the quinjet being found, since at that point there was nothing to be done anyway. Then Tony would look like he'd helped Ross, even though sharing that information would make no difference at that point.
"Wanda, are you sure Tony wasn't lying to you?"
"I'm sure. Why am I defending him to you? It used to be the reverse."
Notes:
I randomly REALLY enjoyed writing the rain sequence lol! It was fun visualizing Wanda and her friends chilling indoors watching through the window and/or going outside:)
I am impatiently excited to get to when Yelena shows up, but that is, uh...not going to be smooth sailing immediately xD Both she and Wanda are kinda paranoid about potentially losing Nat, after all.
So now they have an unwanted phone number for Ross (lol) and the Cap half of their rogue team is on the move! More on THAT next chapter.
Any feedback is much much appreciated as always!<3
Chapter 15: Chapter 15
Summary:
In which Wanda, Nat, and Clint contact the rest of the rogues...
Notes:
I know this chapter is shorter than usual, but it’s where it made the most sense to break! I’d rather chapters be different lengths than cut the story in weird places lol. I hope you enjoy!:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“I'm just not sure I like this plan," Clint said again a few minutes later. "You...want to talk to that asshole?"
"Of course not. But even if I fail, it won't...hurt anything. Not even me. Ross already hates me." And I have you and Nat and Laura here. I do not have to attempt facing him alone. Wanda clearly remembered Ross believing she could track Steve and Bucky herself even after multiple torture sessions and days with no food. Convincing him she would do something to him from here now shouldn't be difficult. The problem was Wanda wasn't sure she could act convincingly if she had to speak to Ross directly.
Natasha spoke quietly, but her tone was firm. "It may very well work. But if you do it, that is not something you can take back. If Ross records the conversation, which he probably will, then he'll have a recording of you threatening him. Threatening Ross into letting Scott go home seems like a reasonable idea, but doing it over the phone isn't safe."
"But I can't...do that in person right now," Wanda said, her voice trembling slightly. I can't. I know I can't. Scott must miss Cassie. Cassie must miss her daddy. “And now is...is a good t-time to do it, because the quinjet has already been seen, the location compromised already."
"Then find out if Vision can tell if the conversation is being recorded. If he can, then he could wipe Ross's device secretly. That would be worth the risk. I'll support you whatever you decide, but I honestly think we should stick with what we already did this time, warning them to leave, and plan this later." Natasha paused and went on, "Steve did message back a quick 'understood', so if Tony's estimate of an hour is accurate, they should have time to get away easily and are probably gone already. Waiting until we have more time to plan what to say to Ross won't hurt anything at this point."
Wanda nodded and didn't say anything else, reluctant to admit she was extremely relieved that Nat didn't think she should call Ross right now. The part of her that rather wanted to hurt that man terrified her, and the rest of her was irrationally frightened of him. She had snipped at Ross, saying that he didn't scare her, but she knew that was not true. That's stupid. I could literally just kill him if I really wanted to.
Oh, what is wrong with me? I do not want to do that. I just...I don't want him near me. All the same, Wanda knew if she saw some report that Ross was gone, she certainly would not be shedding any tears over it.
Clint crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. "Could just get rid of him. No great loss. Protect other enhanced people like Wanda from being hurt."
Natasha turned on him and shoved him against the wall. "Barton, shut up. We're not assassinating anyone. Don't tempt me. What the hell would you suggest that for?"
"It's what all three of us are thinking and not saying. He's just as bad, if not worse, than some of the very same people the Avengers have had to neutralize before," Clint said quietly. "I know we're not doing that, obviously. Just wanted to say it."
Wanda remained silent, just watching Nat and Clint. Knowing her friends had had the same morbid thought but didn't want to actually do it was...reassuring. Clint and Natasha were not horrible people. She trusted them. Maybe she was not horrible for thinking it either.
_______________
The next few hours, Wanda remained worried about the other half of the rogues and would not eat anything or go to sleep. After the simple 'understood' message, there was nothing. They were too far away for Wanda to reach them telepathically, and she still did not have permission from them to use her mental abilities on them anyway. Instead she lay in bed feeling jittery and wondering if there was something else she could do that did not involve locating Ross and mind-controlling him, which the dark part of her liked the idea of way too much.
"Nat...?"
"Wanda, there is no word yet, same as five minutes ago, and ten minutes before that, and every other time you've asked." Natasha understood why Wanda kept asking over and over, but she wished Wanda would go to sleep all the same. She couldn't tell if her friend was literally spreading her own anxiety to anyone near her or if she herself was just anxious anyway. Probably both. “If you can't sleep, do you want to practice disguising your accent?" Nat offered, hoping that might distract Wanda a little bit.
"Okay." Wanda looked at Natasha with great interest, thinking that yes, she would love to do that. "I don't know where to start."
"You already did that part. Listening and vaguely copying. Remember that undercover mission where we played a couple of molls to infiltrate a Russian crime syndicate?"
Wanda frowned, remembering that incident. While nothing had gone seriously wrong, that was the absolute closest that she'd edged to any of Nat's awful honeypot missions, and she had flat out told her friend she was never doing anything like that again. It probably would not have been so bad if her assigned target had not been such a disgusting old creeper hung up on thinking she was fifteen and liking the idea far too much. She'd ended up throwing him across a room through a very expensive glass window, which made him land in a thorny bush outside the mansion where this party was taking place.
Wanda was not particularly sorry for it, either, since they had gotten the needed information before she had reacted like that, shouting that she was not fifteen and calling the man a long string of the most colorful Russian insults she could think of. Once Natasha had made sure Wanda was okay, the Black Widow started laughing, because hearing normally quiet Wanda do that was funny.
"I do remember, but Russian is much closer to Sokovian in sounds than English," Wanda said slowly. She knew quite well that while she mentally considered herself decently fluent in both English and Russian, she would never pass as a native English speaker, though she did pass when speaking Russian.
Nat nodded in agreement. "Yes, that's true, but the idea is still the same, to copy the sounds. You don't really need more English vocabulary or grammar knowledge to pass; you know enough already. There are just certain sounds that make your accent more obvious." Natasha knew there were times when some English word or phrase would come up that Wanda didn't know, but in general she was very good at languages, especially considering she didn't have anything past a fifth grade education officially. Last year, Wanda had told her she and Pietro spent hours upon hours in the small library in Novi Grad reading books and perusing for music on the slow old computers there, and Nat knew that was where much of Wanda's language skills were from. The library had been warm and safe, and nobody bothered them in there as long as they were quiet (easy) and clean (more difficult but manageable with some creativity).
"Like I make 'th' sound 'd'."
"Yes, you do. But, you just made the 'th' sound correctly. It just doesn't come out that way naturally. You also make your 'w' sound like 'v' a lot, and your 'ch' and 'j' tend to also stand out. And your vowels tend to sound different also." Natasha watched Wanda closely, not wanting her to feel like someone was picking on her speech patterns, either.
I feel so stupid. While Wanda knew for an absolute fact that the others did not think she was dumb, she still felt out of place anyway among geniuses and trained people. "I'm not...I don't fit. You and everyone else have fancy diplomas and training and I'm just...I don't."
"Training, sure, but I just have a GED, Wanda. That's it. I never went to a normal high school or college."
"I didn't...finish...fifth grade."
"So what? You are not stupid. I don't think a couple of homeless kids trying to teach themselves languages in a small library is anything to sneeze at." Natasha went to sit next to Wanda, not even touching or hugging her, just sitting beside her.
"That is why I, um...don't read English so good in the first place. There...weren't very many English books. Lots of Sokovian and Russian ones." Wanda didn't explain that the few English books they did have access to were contraband anyway. The old lady, Mrs. Zivkovic, that usually ran the library let the twins into a secret hidden room with those books in it awhile after she'd realized the children came in alone rather than with their parents now. Except then the kind lady died and the new librarian cleared those items out like they were 'supposed' to do. At that point the two of them were thirteen and too terrified to return after the new librarian threatened to report them.
"You read perfectly fine," Natasha told her firmly, "and even if you didn't, that would not be your fault. Knowing multiple languages, even just to have basic conversations in them and be understood, is great. Somehow I doubt Hydra was concerned with teaching you and Pietro anything, so everything you two learned after age ten, you did on your own."
I know. I still feel...inadequate now anyway. Wanda knew she logically had no reason to feel that way, but she still did all the same. "My parents used to be very concerned that we weren't...behind or stupid. They loved Sokovia, but..." she blinked and swiped at her eyes roughly. "I mean. I know they knew we weren't entirely safe. We were happy, but Papa wanted us to emigrate so badly. But we didn't have enough money. No, ah..." she paused, trying to remember the word her daddy had used. "Sponsor. We were too poor to leave alone, but not poor enough to have a sponsor. I think? Because we did have a home and necessities. I think that is the right explanation. I, um...my friend's father...said he'd help, but...Papa didn't trust him." And I'm the only one of us still here now. "...Why am I the only one left?"
Now Natasha did reach for the girl, just holding her close and ignoring the tears dampening her shirt as Wanda buried her face in her friend's shoulder. "Because sometimes life is trash and unfair," Nat said quietly.
"I hope Pietro is happy a-and reunited with our parents," Wanda whispered. "At least he did not have to...go to the Raft. Better me than him." She felt Natasha tense and give her good hand a gentle squeeze. I'm safe, Pietro. Really. I hope you are happy and not sad if you can see me now.
"Better neither of you," Nat muttered, and then added, "I know the team can't replace Pietro or your parents, but you just remember you're not alone here."
I still feel lonely and...isolated sometimes anyway. I don't even know why. I am literally not alone at all. Even in the Raft, I...really wasn't, not until I was too weak to try messaging Clint anymore. Wanda knew logically that even at that point, the others were still trying to help and comfort her despite knowing she couldn't really respond. While she couldn't remember all the details from the final couple days in the Raft at all, she did recall Sam's calm steady voice repeatedly asking for either someone to provide medical help, or for one of the team to be allowed out to help instead.
"You need to do something. You've tortured her to the point she can't move to get whatever small amounts of water and soup provided."
"Let one of us out to help. People can die of dehydration in three days. She's already seriously injured on top of that."
"Why can you not see Wanda isn't a threat to you right now? The flagrant violations of human rights laws in this place have seen to that. Please help her."
At some point, the guards had gotten tired of hearing Sam, and while, again, Wanda couldn't remember everything, she was pretty sure someone had given Sam his black eye for repeatedly trying to help, along with setting off that shock collar on her yet again.
The other main thing she recalled now was Scott singing and trying to provide some kind of distraction and entertainment. Of course, the guards didn't let Scott do that after 'bedtime' was called, but otherwise they seemed to just be baffled, and let Ant-Man do as he pleased.
Wanda suddenly really, really wanted to contact them and say thank-you. "I want to message Sam and Scott," she said now.
Natasha nodded, pleased that Wanda was initiating doing so, and not merely to provide a warning. "Sure. You can use my laptop. I already showed you how to send encrypted messages months ago, so you don't need my help to do that, and I did tell you the new email addresses we're using, right?"
Wanda nodded. "I remember. Will you...stay anyway, please?" She was relieved Natasha didn't question that, and merely grabbed the laptop before returning to sit next to her. Wanda's expression lit up seeing the desktop wallpaper on the computer. Nat had made a simple collage of different photos of herself and her friends. "There's me. I see the rest of the team, too...Nat, is this Yelena?" she asked, pointing to a picture of Natasha hugging a younger girl in a dark green vest, her blonde hair twisted up on her head in braids.
"It is."
Wanda blinked, noticing that her friend had ever so conveniently arranged the collage so that the photos of Yelena and herself were right next to each other. If someone else had done it, Wanda would have chalked this up to coincidence, but this was Natasha. Putting Yelena and Wanda next to one another in those pictures was not coincidence, and it made Wanda feel all warm and fuzzy inside. "...That's you," she said now, pointing at another picture. This one was a rather sad and grumpy-looking Nat, with a younger Clint and Laura. It looked like they were at either a carnival or an amusement park of some kind.
"Yeah, that's...shortly after I defected from the Red Room." Nat stared at the screen, thinking. "I am probably about your age there, maybe. Good god, they shouldn't have dragged me to a park back then, but they did anyway."
"You took me!to an amusement park last year," Wanda pointed out.
"Yeah, well, you didn't act like a bratty delinquent, either."
"You were dragging the depressed weapon of mass destruction around instead."
Natasha sighed. "I wish you wouldn't call yourself that. Send your message." She did put one arm around Wanda's shoulders, and was relieved herself when Wanda didn't tense or flinch. In fact, Wanda seemed quite relaxed now, especially after pulling up the emails and seeing there was, in fact, an update finally.
So they're safe in France. Good. Wanda quickly typed what she wanted to say, mostly just saying thank you for continuing to try to help her in that prison, and for Steve being willing to risk getting her out. Then she added that she did remember Scott singing a lot the last two days, and asked if he was doing so for Sam and Steve now.
Wanda found this quite amusing.
Natasha knew what this singing Wanda was referring to was, from watching the security footage, but she was honestly surprised Wanda could remember it at all. "You can remember things from those last two days?" she asked. "You do not have to talk if you don't want to, to be clear."
"Yes," Wanda told her, "not much, but I do remember that. That, and Sam repeatedly trying to get someone to help me. I think...I think someone punched him. But besides that...mostly Scott singing." She hesitated, her shaky fingers squeezing into a fist. I think Clint was crying. I don't know if I could just feel him even though my magic was broken or if I heard him, but...
"Is there something else?" Nat asked gently.
Wanda nodded and poked 'send' on her message. Natasha had watched the footage, so she was not revealing some secret that wasn't hers to share. C-L-I-N-T C-R-I-E-D. C-O-U-L-D-N-T H-E-L-P.
Natasha did not remember seeing such a thing on the footage, but she did remember seeing Hawkeye glare directly into the cell camera and subsequently keep his back to it for awhile. With the poor audio quality and Scott's singing, there was no way to tell if he had been crying. Clint knew they were recording him, obviously, and didn't want 'weakness' like that recorded at all. Certainly he probably thought no one else knew except maybe Sam, since Sam's cell was right next to his, and hadn't been making noise like Scott. "You could actually hear him, or did you sense him?"
Wanda tensed, pushed the laptop away, and stood up, her good hand touching the wall for balance. "I shouldn't have said anything. I thought...you would have seen it already a-and so...it wouldn't matter." Now she felt like she had spilled a secret that wasn't hers to share. If she was in Clint's place, she wouldn't want that shared.
"I suspect I did, technically. The timing you described matches up with him purposely avoiding his face being on the camera. Wanda, you didn't do anything wrong, do you understand? Neither did he." Nat looked Wanda right in the eyes. "What happened there is not his fault. It is not your fault. It is not Sam's or Scott's fault either."
"But, he never cries. Ever."
"He does once in awhile, if he thinks no one knows. Rarely. He'll be okay, same as any of us would. You feel much better, but not back to normal either, right?"
Wanda nodded and sat back down again. That was true, and it did make sense. Besides, if Natasha had already seen Clint cry before, she didn't feel so bad about saying anything. "If he feels like me, he doesn't have a...normal."
"Normal meaning you are your normal self. For you, that means you can function, any symptoms are manageable. You've seen in my head. Do you think I don't have a normal too, because of those past events?" Nat smiled ruefully and shook her head.
Wanda looked down and fiddled with the splint on her arm. Nat isn't going to wreck things with her head if she messes up. “I think you are the strongest person I know. Um...like I told you...before...I didn't...choose old memories on purpose, I swear, but...your worst nightmare was the only...real one. The others just imagined horrible things. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry I did that to you."
Natasha reached for Wanda's hand and just gave her a reassuring squeeze. "You've apologized for that more than enough, Wanda. Do you remember us talking before we left Norway right after the escape?"
"It's a bit...hazy. Not unpleasantly, really, but it feels odd to think about now," Wanda said honestly. "I remember you braiding my hair. And feeling safe, finally." She paused, trying to remember more details. "You told me if I thought I was broken, then all of us were."
Nat nodded. "Exactly. A stressful, traumatizing job doesn't exactly equate to healthy minds. But we're using what we have to do our best to help others now, despite what we might have done, or what happened to us, in the past." She was quiet for a minute, hoping that information sunk into Wanda's head. "And frankly, I think for the two of us, the bad things we have done are so twisted with an organization manipulating and abusing us as minors that it's difficult to tell where the abuse ends and our own crimes begin. I don't think that absolves us, of course, especially not me-big difference between my assassinating people and your sticking some horrible nightmares in people's heads-but still."
"I killed those innocent people in Lagos."
"Wanda, no. That is not on you, that was not a crime. That is not even remotely the same thing, and shouldn't be on your ledger at all." Natasha stared at Wanda, remembering poor Antonia Dreykov, who was probably near Wanda's age herself now. The fact that treating that little girl as collateral damage whilst attempting to eliminate Dreykov so long ago hadn't even paid off in the end weighed on her heavily, and she wondered what Antonia was doing now. Surely that girl had no interest in having contact with her, but maybe Yelena knew and could tell her.
Wanda studied Nat closely, sensing that something was bothering her. "You feel...sad. I don't think it has anything to do with me. I...I'm not reading your mind, I promise, I just...feel it."
Natasha shook her head. Of course Wanda had noticed, being a very empathetic telepath. "I don't want to discuss it right now, but maybe another time. It has nothing to do you specifically-I'd trust you with it. I just don't want to talk about it at the moment." She wanted to be explicitly clear that it wasn't Wanda in particular she didn't want to talk to, because then Wanda would be upset and probably think Nat didn't trust her.
You told me not to bottle up my feelings, Wanda thought, but she easily understood not wanting to talk about things. So she didn't say anything and offered her friend a hug instead.
_________________
In the morning after breakfast, the three rogue Avengers sat in the living room and checked for new messages from the other half of their team. "Only doing this because you wanted me to," Clint informed Wanda grumpily, who had been staring at him with those big green puppy dog eyes of hers constantly until he gave in. "I think you've been hanging around Lila too much."
Wanda did not look very sorry. She smiled innocently at him, quite aware of what she had done and just pleased it had worked. "Look, Scott sent us a video," she commented now. When she clicked on it, a very amused Steve could be seen clumsily setting up and waving into the camera, and then he disappeared from view, clearly the one doing the recording. Sam's head popped in instead.
"Hey, fellow fugitive friends, hope this makes you laugh. Wanda, Lang decided he wanted to make this for you when he found out when your birthday was back in June." The rest of the short video was mostly just Scott singing the happy birthday song in the absolute worst Sokovian Wanda had ever heard in her life, but she was beaming all the same. Then at the end, all three of their teammates appeared back in the shaky frame waving.
"Video call whenever you're ready, we'd love to talk to the rest of our rogue team," Steve said hopefully. "We'll be waiting around 11AM your time, but if not, that's fine too." Then the recording ended.
Wanda was quiet for a minute and then just said, "Let's try now. It's only a little bit after eleven now. I want to say hello."
Clint sighed, not particularly thrilled about the idea, but he knew quite well Wanda wanted him there. Natasha pulled up the coded video call app they had planned to use for this sort of thing and tried putting the call through. "All right, looks promising, at least..." Nat commented.
There was a short wait, but soon their teammates popped up. "We were just about to assume you guys weren't going to show up. Which would have been fine," Sam assured them. "Thanks for getting us that warning. Got out easy."
"You look a hundred times better than before," Scott said happily.
"Oh? Thanks a lot," Sam teased, which immediately made Scott frown and backtrack.
"I mean Wanda, obviously-not that your eye doesn't look way better now, but-"
"Lang, chill. I know what you meant. He's right, it's nice to see you, Wanda. Glad you're feeling well enough to send messages yourself and be on a video call now. The hair's new, too. Looks good." Sam sounded incredibly relieved too, just like Scott, and Wanda realized they had probably been worried about her since their group split up after the rescue in the first place.
"I'm much better." Wanda more felt than saw Clint give her a suspicious look, but she ignored this for now. I do feel better, and I don't want them worrying about me. “Thank you for the video. It was sweet and funny. I, um..." She blinked and instinctively put her good hand over her heart, the same spot that still felt like part of her was missing. I hate our birthday now, but... "Pietro would have liked it too," Wanda added finally, deciding she should just say it.
Scott's generally happy demeanor drooped a bit. "Sorry...wanted to make you happier, not sadder."
Wanda shook her head. "No, it's fine. I don't like our birthday now, but..." I don't know how to explain myself at all. I liked seeing the video. Pietro not being here to see it too just makes me sad, also. “You cared enough to try...learning a song in my language. It made me happy. I just...wish Pietro was here too."
"Ha, told you your accent sucked," Sam informed Scott goodnaturedly. "She says you tried learning it." Then he looked back into the camera and said, "We understand, no need to explain. You can be happy and sad at the same time."
"Why are you all in the quinjet?" Nat asked now, studying the background behind their friends. "I thought you were in France."
Steve sighed. "We are, but frankly after what happened in Norway, I don't want us to leave it unattended. So one of us is going to stay with it at all times. We're just all with it now because we were hoping you three would call. I think your idea to give up the quinjet as a way to get Scott home might actually help the rest of us in a way. One less thing to worry about. Over half the safe houses on our list can't even be realistically used if we have the jet." He frowned, noticing Clint seemingly pissed, his arm around Wanda protectively. "Clint, are you okay?"
"You left our kid in that place for three weeks."
Wanda immediately tensed. "He doesn't mean that, I know it takes a long time to set up any res-"
"I mean every word," Clint interrupted, "and it's the truth. You and Bucky should have taken her with you."
Wanda felt a little thread of annoyance, and she blinked a few times before speaking up herself. "That was my choice. I lifted the tower rubble so...so Steve and Bucky could get out," she said, her voice quiet but firm. I'm not sorry for that. I'm sorry I didn't make a proper escape attempt sooner. I am not sorry I helped Cap and his friend get away at the cost of my own freedom at that moment.
"She's right," Sam said into the silence. "Come on, you know it, same as I do. It sucks, but the people to blame here are Ross and his dumbass goons. Not any of us, or Stark and his team either, honestly. That prison would've been boring but not unbearable if we'd all been treated fairly. Then none of us would care about it whatsoever. You need to go talk to Laura, dude. Go touch some grass, give the kid a hug, spar with Nat. She already looks much better than when we split up. Now go take care of yourself, too."
I'm not a kid, Wanda wanted to say, but hearing their missing teammates actually care was...nice. She stayed quiet, happy to just listen unless asked something directly.
"Yeah, yeah, I will."
"If you want to take care of her, you have to take care of yourself first," Sam went on calmly. Then he turned his attention to Wanda herself. "And you...how's your arm doing at this point? I was confident we were able to tend to everything else properly ourselves."
Wanda looked down at her arm and shrugged slightly. "It still hurts, but not so bad now," she said truthfully. "And I can do this, at least." Wanda lifted her splinted arm a bit and demonstrated she could open and close her fist easily. I don't know what else to say. I think it's okay, but none of us will really know for sure until it heals enough to take the splint off.
Sam seemed satisfied by this. "Good. You take care of yourself and enjoy relaxing at that house."
"I'm still sorry for the whole mess. I swear we came for all of you the second we had everything set up. There was no way for us to swoop back into that airport and get you out. Believe me, I wanted to." Steve hesitated before continuing, obviously uncertain whether he should say more or not. "Bucky wanted me to dump and trade him for Wanda, make a distraction. He thought the government was going to murder her right there in the airport, and I...insisted they wouldn't. Kept going on about the past and saying he wasn't worth saving, especially if it meant another Hydra victim was sacrificed for it."
I wish I knew Steve's friend more. I can understand that sort of thinking completely. "I'm glad you got him out," Wanda assured a clearly very upset Steve. "Look. Not murdered. I'm here, I'm okay. If we had to pick between...dead Bucky and injured me...obviously we pick the second one." She could feel Nat's approving but sad gaze on her, and instantly knew she had said the right thing. "...And I was not mind-wiped like your friend. He has zero responsibility f-for what he did as the Winter Soldier." Unlike me.
"You were still a victim of Hydra, regardless," Steve told her, "and if Bucky, my best friend who was brainwashed and tortured for decades, and should have the most reason of anyone to dislike you, isn't angry with you and Pietro for what you two did volunteering for those people unknowingly, you should believe him."
Wanda really wished she could talk to Steve's friend.
"And hey, Wanda, I just remembered. Scott has something else he wanted to tell you about," Steve went on. "Scott, tell her the code name you gave her."
Scott looked so pleased with himself that Wanda was intrigued now. "Well, your powers are red. And you're pretty much magic. Little red witch girl is way too long, and you hate it. Little Red and Little Witch sound like family nicknames, not hero code names...Scarlet sounds good, though. So..."
Natasha looked at Wanda and then back at the camera. "You want to code her as Scarlet Witch."
"Oh, darn. I wanted to reveal it," Scott said, disappointed. "But...yeah. Bet Cassie would think it sounded cool too."
Wanda blinked, unsure whether she had imagined her magic reacting briefly inside or not. Something she could not describe had created a small but visceral reaction to her, as if that was not just a silly name Ant-Man had made up so she would have an official hero identity too, and it did not make sense. Whatever it was wasn't something she liked. "It sounds nice, but I don't want to be the magic-identified one," she said finally. There. I hope that makes sense? I don't know how to explain myself.
Scott was nonplussed; he only shrugged. "Okay. I'll think of another one you might like better."
They mutually decided to continue the 11AM EST meetups, with the understanding that if any of them were not able to show up, it did not necessarily mean anything was wrong; they should just wait five minutes and then leave and none of them would mind. Nat made sure to inform their teammates that Tony was supposed to come by the vacation house soon to discuss things in person since it would be easier.
"You sure that's a good idea?" Sam asked.
"It's no worse than the three of us being in this house in the first place. We'll be fine."
Notes:
Heh, Scott unknowingly dropping Wanda’s hero name, even if they do immediately discard it! I had to:)
Vision (and Tony) will reappear next chapter!
Any feedback is much appreciated:)
Chapter 16: Chapter 16
Summary:
In which Vision (and Tony) return to the vacation house, a solid plan is finally made to deal with Ross, and Wanda is able to spend a bit of time with Vision.
Notes:
my ship fluff I wrote some ship fluff! Good gosh I am so pleased with myself writing Wanda and Vision interacting:)
As per usual, writing Tony gives me trouble, so I would really appreciate feedback on him lol.
Anyways. I hope you enjoy:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Three days later (seventeenth day since the rescue, Wanda thought, strangely still cataloguing days in her head), Wanda was out on the balcony deck with Lila and Cooper when a familiar figure alighted onto the deck.
"Wanda, your weird red boyfriend is here," Cooper announced unnecessarily.
"A flying prince," Lila whispered to Wanda, still pleased with this idea.
"Will you and Cooper tell everyone else that Vis is here?" Wanda asked.
"Okay." Lila wanted to watch, but she did go back inside with Cooper, closing the door with an excited slam.
Wanda wondered why on earth Vision would show up with no warning again since he could have messaged her easily this time, but she figured he probably had wanted to surprise her. That kind of surprise was good. "I'm glad you are here again. Is...is Tony here too?" She still didn't want to see Tony, but she fully expected him to show up randomly at some point to discuss things as planned.
"Not yet, but he wished to surprise everyone here with takeout this evening," Vision told her. "I have decided to spoil the surprise because I thought you would want to know beforehand."
Wanda found this mildly amusing, and she nodded. "I do, thank you. Now I can be...mentally prepared for it. You...didn't drive this time. Are you sure it's safe?"
"Yes. Finding evidence our rogue teammates were indeed at that house in Norway was very helpful for us, even though they were no longer there. Ross has not bothered the Compound in days." Vision was hesitant to touch Wanda at all without her initiating it, after accidentally making her uncomfortable by stroking her hair when he had visited before. She was clearly stronger than last time, because she was standing there easily on her own, her good hand just resting on the railing to steady herself; and she'd been practicing walking along the balcony deck before he had landed. "Would you mind a hug? I will understand if you would prefer no touching."
Wanda answered by simply hugging him herself. I love hugs. Hugs are safe. “Hugs are good," she whispered. "I appreciate being asked, but you don't have to ask to do that."
"But you did not like your hair touched last time, and you kept those feelings to yourself until Ms. Romanoff mentioned it." Vision willingly returned the hug, glad to notice that Wanda actually had some strength in her arm now. Last time she had been so weak and shaky that she was barely holding onto him, really. Now he could actually feel her squeezing him as tightly as she could, and she wasn't leaning on him so much to stand.
I don't know how to explain myself. Nat told me to tell the truth. “That is...different. This makes me feel safe. I, um..." Wanda closed her eyes, her face hidden against Vision's shirt. "I don't know why, but I can't have anyone except Nat touching my hair comfortably right now. It's not you personally." She pulled away so she could see his face, half worried how he might react, but the synthezoid was just concerned.
"Because people were yanking it in that prison," Vision said flatly.
"Every time they injected...things into me." Wanda simply sat down where she was, leaning against the railing, and patted the deck beside her. She was still keenly aware of the bandages on her neck, though Nat continued to assure her it was healing nicely and there were fewer dressings there now, and she wished all of it would go away both because it was still sore, and because she didn't want to look at it nor have others staring at it.
"If I told you I might have something to put on your neck, would that be acceptable?" Vision asked quietly. "It just seems like if you are able to heal that entirely, you could hide much more easily after the summer ends."
Wanda shrugged slightly. "Nat said it was healing fine, and I...believe her, since it doesn't hurt nearly so much now. But...yes. You can do that." She didn't smile, but she scooted closer when she sensed Vis touching her face, ever so gently. You make me feel normal.
"You look nice."
"Somehow I rather doubt that. I think your eyes need adjusting," Wanda said, only half teasing. "Maybe my hair." She knew Nat had put it in two fishtail braids today for her, but she hadn't really looked at them herself, just told her friend to braid it however she liked.
"Your hair does look nice, but I do not need my eyes recalibrated." Vision was glad this seemed to amuse Wanda, because she was clearly trying not to laugh now. "I hate to see you in pain, but otherwise you always look nice to me. Besides, all of this will vanish, regardless."
Wanda was quiet for a minute, her expression slightly crumpled now. No, it won't. "Vis, my neck is not going to look completely back to normal once it heals. I know because Nat told me, and...I'm glad she was honest." And I have scars all over my back that have been there for a long, long time. He has no idea about those. Wanda couldn't help picturing him seeing them while they might be doing some intimate thing way later and then treating her differently because of it. Oh good grief, I need to stop. That's ridiculous.
Vision held her a bit tighter. "As long as it does not hurt you anymore, then." The idea that there might be permanent marks left on Wanda made him truly angry, because that meant people had hurt her, caused her pain, and he hadn't been there to stop it. "I do not care what you look like."
"Then why do you want to...put something on my neck right now?"
"Because it is still hurting you, and visible injuries make it difficult to hide."
Wanda remained silent for a bit, and then finally whispered, "I can't hide a fractured arm or those...those tremors, either." That isn't the same. Those are far more common, especially the arm. She watched Vision link his hand with her own smaller, somewhat shaky one. ”I'm sorry for being such a mess. I'm trying, I promise. I'm better."
"Those things are far less identifiable, especially an injured arm. There must be thousands of young female humans with red hair and a splint on their arms. Moreover, the secretary is looking for a dark-haired human girl, not one with red hair. You cannot notice your hands are a bit shaky unless someone is already close to you. Distinctive burns to the neck are different. I do not think that would be common at all, especially not combined with other smaller injuries, all of which match yours exactly. Please do not apologize. You are not a mess; you are still healing. You know this." Vision decided he would sit here as long as need be, if it would help.
Wanda shook her head bitterly. "I don't...I don't think anyone there cared to...keep track other than to..." Vis notices the little things, but none of the people in that place did. She closed her eyes against hot tears. "To keep doing the same...things...again and again. I don't know." No one listened to Sam trying to get someone to provide medical assistance. No one cared she was hurting so much at all; at best she was treated with utter indifference, as if she weren't a live thing in the first place. "I don't think I would have lived much longer if I hadn't been rescued then. I couldn't move enough to even get my water anymore."
Vision was briefly stymied hearing that. Though he had known already Wanda had been in horrible condition when first rescued, he hadn't realized it was quite that bad, either. Wanda believed that she'd been dying in that place, and while part of him thought that was probably because her mind was hurting too, that certainly was not all of it. "Wanda, was no one feeding you there?" he asked in horror. "Water? Do you mean that prison was starving you?"
"There was watery soup after the first week...Sam finally convinced them I needed something to eat," Wanda said, oddly calm now. "Vis, you knew this. Nat told you last time."
"I thought 'starving' in this context meant 'not enough food', not giving a person nothing."
"I'd rather starve than be force-fed." I was so scared of those guards...touching me or something that I probably made everything worse purposely encouraging them to be scared of me...no I didn't. Nat said I did the right thing. That was protecting me in a way, even if it was causing the lack of food and whatever else to happen. Wanda knew Natasha's worry that someone could have sexually assaulted her in that place was a hundred percent valid, and she suspected that if it wasn't her trapped there, wasn't the girl with unstable mind-controlling and telekinetic abilities, it would have happened.
After all, the last time someone directly tried that, she had killed both culprits. That wasn't something she had told anyone, not even Nat, because she felt bad that she didn't feel bad for doing so. She'd mind-controlled both Hydra men into turning their guns on each other and simply stumbled away to find Pietro. Minutes later, Strücker was praising her improving skill at using her enhancements. Pietro had reasoned, you were defending yourself, so it's fine. What kind of stupid training session was that?
Now, Wanda was quite sure Strücker had simply used her to eliminate two of his men that he didn't want to work for him anymore, because he had been way too pleased with her reaction. After all, oops, oh well, one of my prize pupils is still learning. Sorry a couple men died while she's training, it was an accident.
Regardless, contact with others elicited very, very different reactions to her at this point. If it was someone she trusted and loved like a sibling, like Pietro or Nat, then she wanted all the hugs and touch she could have. Vision made her feel different, not in a bad way, just...different. The happy warm fuzzies in her heart were not quite the same, and she couldn't articulate it verbally. Strangers touching her was almost always bad, unless it was a small child like Lila or something.
"Do you want to go indoors?" Vision asked now, unsure whether to address Wanda's previous comment or not. She didn't seem distraught at the moment, but he knew she didn't really want to talk about people starving her for weeks, either. He settled for simply keeping his arm around her shoulders and holding her uninjured hand.
"Okay. You can show me and Nat whatever you brought," Wanda suggested, willing to try putting something else on those burns if Natasha thought it would help, but not particularly wanting to without her friend screening it first.
Vision was relieved to discover simply letting Wanda hold onto his arm was enough for her to walk steadily on her own. "Do you need that as well?" he asked, pointing at the crutch Wanda had left next to one of the deck chairs.
"I'm okay. I just need to take it inside." Wanda rather liked holding Vision's arm; it made her feel more like an ordinary girl hanging about with the boy she liked, which seemed silly but was true anyway.
They found Natasha waiting expectantly in the bedroom she shared with Wanda. "There you are. Took long enough for you to come inside from your surprise date," Nat teased, but she was obviously not displeased.
"Nat, it isn't a date. We were just talking," Wanda said.
"Oh, you don't talk on dates?"
Wanda's cheeks grew a bit pink. Vision, unsure why this had made Wanda all flustered, gently hugged her and then sat a polite distance away from her on the bed, which just made Nat look all the more entertained.
Wanda threw a pillow at Nat and completely missed. Then when her friend began laughing, she picked the pillow up telekinetically and dropped it directly on Nat's head.
Wanda looked exceedingly pleased with herself.
"...Might someone explain what is so hysterical?" Vision asked now. Nat was downright cackling now, which seemed very odd, and Wanda was stifling laughter herself. "I am glad you are happy, but I do not understand."
"It's so blatantly obvious you two love each other, and you are both so awkward about it," Nat said truthfully. "And frankly, if it isn't going to hurt anyone's feelings, then it's rather fun to tease you two."
Pietro would tease me too. Wanda could picture him now, doing something exactly like Nat had just done, and she wondered if Natasha realized her behavior reminded her of her twin. She probably does and would just stop immediately if I was really upset. Exactly like Pietro would do. "Vis brought something for my burns," she ventured finally. "I told him he had to show you."
Natasha didn't question why Wanda wanted the small jar of cream Vision handed her inspected first. It seemed Wanda's trust of the synthezoid did not extend to putting unknown substances on her damaged neck. "Seems harmless, but I don't know if it will help any more than what we've been doing. Vision, I assume the...recipe is another of Tony's prototypes?"
Vision nodded. "Yes. He was very upset after we spoke with you on the video call previously and saw Wanda. He said he wished to create something to make up for the damage that torture device caused."
"Tony didn't even see it, Vis." Wanda abruptly stood up, grabbed her crutch, and went into the bathroom by herself. Frustrated and irritated, she carefully peeled the dressings off her neck and then stared at herself in the mirror. Nat is right. It does look better than when I saw it at the motel, anyway. And much less of that mess has to be covered now, too. Without further mulling over, she reentered the bedroom and stared straight at Vision. "Does he really think making a new prototype invention makes up for the old one?" she asked, a slight edge in her voice.
"Wanda, what-"
"Because it doesn't. He is going to come here and bring takeout, and pretend everything is fine. It's not fine!"
"I am so sorry, I just wished to help."
"Stop staring at it. I know what it looks like."
"Vision, go wait in the hallway, please," Natasha ordered, pushing the horrified synthezoid out of the room. In a second she returned and crossed her arms at a very clearly upset, angry Wanda. The younger girl's eyes were tinted red, never a good sign, and Nat could tell Wanda was looking for something to throw that would be satisfying but not hurt anything. "Wanda, I did tell you to be honest with him."
"But what I did was petty and mean. I know." Wanda's eyes returned to their usual green, now full of tears. "I'm just so tired of this. I...don't even feel all that angry with Tony, either. I don't like him, but I know he's trying." I am better. And then some stupid thing sets me off and I'm angry and upset all over again. "The stupid part? I'm sure I confused Vis behaving like that. I was fine outside, talking. I teased him. I told him about...Raft things. He was holding me. I felt normal, for a bit, anyway."
"Tell him that," Natasha said quietly. "Look, I know I'm not exactly a reliable source for relationship advice. More often than not, it's just been a job for me. But I've seen you and Vision together. He loves you, even if he doesn't explicitly verbalize it."
"Maybe I should apologize."
"Are you sorry for snapping at him?"
Wanda mulled this over for a minute. "I'm not sorry for what I said about Tony, because I think it's true, but I am for...for saying it so rudely, and showing Vis my burns like that knowing it would make him upset," she decided. And then I snapped at him for staring, when I know full well he always stares at things to process them.
"Then tell him. You don't have to spend all evening with Tony if he wants to hang about for dinner, either. Now go get our supplies and I'll help you with your neck. If you can pull the dressings off neatly, then you can probably re-dress the burns yourself now, too. I can show you how."
Wanda really did not want to see him at all, but she just nodded. "Okay. Thank you."
___________________
Vision did not answer right away after hearing Wanda's awkward apology and explanation. Finally, he simply said, "I am not sure I understand why your previous behavior warranted an apology."
Wanda picked at her nails on her bad hand and closed her eyes, trying to figure out what to say next. Nat said I should just be honest. “Vis, what I did was mean, especially snapping at you for staring when I...know that is how you process things. Staring is rude, but I usually don't mind when you do it. And I didn't need to be so rude about Tony, either." She glanced at Vision, sitting next to her on the bed. "So, again...I'm very sorry."
"Perhaps you were simply expressing yourself instead of locking your feelings inside." Vision's soft smile made Wanda squirm guiltily. Of course he was trying to excuse her; he thought she always explained human feelings to him as best she could, and now he believed her own rude behavior was acceptable.
"No," Wanda said firmly. "That may have been me expressing myself, but it was still mean. Vis, I...I don't want you to make excuses for me. I know I hurt your feelings, and I'm sorry. My feelings are not more important than yours."
"Yours are the human ones."
"So are yours."
"They are objectively not. I am a synthezoid."
"I don't care what you want to call yourself, you have emotions, same as me or anyone else, and I hurt you." Wanda hesitated, unsure how to explain further. I don't want him to think of himself as not being human. He sounds a bit...sad. “I don't know how to explain. I'm not..." she trailed off again, now wishing Nat had stayed, but her friend had gone downstairs, saying she should handle and explain this herself. "I'm not good at keeping my emotions to myself, sometimes...literally. But I don't want to hurt people I love because of that."
"You are...counting me in this list?" Vision asked quietly.
Wanda's cheeks turned pink, but she immediately nodded. I do. I really, really do.
_____________________
When Tony did arrive a little while later, Wanda was still sitting in the shared bedroom with Vision, now contentedly watching The Brady Bunch with him, which she had found in the big collection of DVDs on the shelf. Wanda closed her eyes briefly and paused the show. I can hold together for a dinner. “We should go downstairs," she said reluctantly.
Vision decided not to question this, but he did ask Wanda if she felt strong enough to handle the stairs alone.
"I can if I have someone watching me," Wanda admitted, looking a bit embarrassed, "but I'm still...slow." She was glad Vision didn't question this, and just stayed close by instead.
"So where's Little Red?" she heard a distinctive annoyingly familiar voice downstairs. Wanda glanced at Vision and sighed, wishing she had not taken such a deep breath to do so. While her ribs felt better, it was still very unpleasant to take deep breaths. They could hear Laura saying she was just upstairs watching TV with Vision, and then Natasha saying don't be pushy. The front door slammed, and Wanda knew Clint had just stalked outside without a word.
Wanda was suddenly very glad she could not gallop down the stairs full speed. This whole evening was going to be tense, and she didn't need her telepathic abilities to sense that.
Once they were downstairs, Wanda simply gave a puzzled-looking Tony a neutral greeting and sat in the living room in a corner of the sofa. Vision hovered next to her until she deadpanned, "I do not take up the whole sofa. Please sit," which made Tony laugh and earn an annoyed glare.
"You look better than you did on the video call."
"I should hope so." Stop it. Don't snap. Be nice, and don't cause trouble. Wanda picked at her nails and then splayed her good hand on the sofa, trying to stop herself from continuing the nervous tic. Then she realized her hand was shaking a bit and wrapped her arms around her middle instead. Tony was not being rude, but his presence made her uncomfortable and irritated all the same. And he was looking at her appearing rather guilty. "It isn't all your fault," she muttered, which felt truthful to her.
Tony thought this comment probably meant his frustrating younger (ex?) teammate really was fine. That sounded like something Wanda would say anytime, sensing that he felt guilty for something but not particularly wanting to engage, either. Knowing the girl was sensing his feelings made him a bit uncomfortable, but he also knew she wasn't actually poking at his mind, either. "Do you have to sense emotions?"
"Don't need to. It's all over your face," Wanda said immediately. Then she went silent and wouldn't say anything else. She did, however, scoot closer to Vision and rest her head on his shoulder, which made him put his own arm around her in a hug.
"There's plenty of Panera Bread crap on the dining room table, so help yourself, little witch," Tony told her.
I don't want your fancy takeout food, Wanda thought peevishly, but she nodded. "I think that you should find Nat and Clint, so we can discuss things."
Tony looked at her thoughtfully. "Hmm, seems you of all people are more willing to talk than they are. Strange."
Wanda didn't answer at all, and just curled up closer to Vision, who could sense that she was uncomfortable and would hold her unless she said not to. She was relieved when Nat entered the room a minute later. "Nat, is Clint coming?" she asked quietly.
"Yes. Laura and I told him to cool off first, that's all. Tony, you do realize you would have caused a lot of trouble if Vision hadn't had the foresight to spoil your 'surprise'." Natasha shook her head and glanced at Wanda, not liking that she had her arms wrapped around her middle again. "Why did you think dumping a suggestion like calling that asshole on her was a good idea? I imagine you didn't break it to her gently, either."
"Because the guy is scared of her. I might like calling her Little Red, but she's not a baby. Frankly from what you said before, I thought she would much rather do that than have that security footage you guys have used for anything." Tony glanced at Wanda and then back at Natasha again. "Look. I really am sorry, okay? I never wanted her harmed like this. Not liking her doesn't mean I wanted her thrown in an underwater prison and tortured."
Wanda felt Vision's arm tighten around her shoulders protectively. "Tony...I do believe you. What I don't understand is...how Ross got your invention," she said slowly. "Because if you created it last year, and then felt guilty about it...why did Ross have it? Why was it with those strike teams in Leipzig?" Do I even want to know? She heard a door slam and sensed that Clint must have returned already, which made her wonder if that was a good thing or not.
"After the Accords, my lab ended up searched. He saw it there because I'd forgotten to delete the designs and discard the prototype itself. I did not voluntarily share it with that man, Wanda, I promise you that much."
"So you knew it was brought to the airport." Clint was standing in the entrance to the living room, arms crossed. "And did nothing about it."
"Uh, she wasn't supposed to be in that airport at all, Hawkeye," Tony said immediately. "Not like it would matter if the mysterious enhanced kid wasn't there. Someone fetched her from the Compound."
Now Wanda was very irritated. "That was my decision. My decision, do all of you understand that yet? I think the only one that does is her," she said, pointing at Natasha, "...and Sam." She sat up straighter and held out her hand, hazed in scarlet now. "So now I am a child you need to protect, but also the weapon of mass destruction too? It can't be both. That isn't fair. Just...can you please just treat me the same as the rest of our broken team? Please." Frustrated, Wanda finally just stood up to leave the room by herself, thinking maybe she would just retreat into the kitchen with Laura and the Barton children. And stop staring at me. I know I'm still limping, I'm fine, let me be.
On impulse, she added, "Tony, I forgive you for creating that torture device. I understand why you did that. Thank you for being honest before. I can't forgive you for letting Ross have it. You know how he is. He is rude even to you." I know he couldn't have interfered in the airport. I get that. But without the collar, I definitely could have helped us escape before...all those awful days stuck in that prison. Well...maybe. Wanda suspected she would have simply been kept sedated to unconsciousness if there was no shock collar specifically designed to contain her, especially considering she had already been getting drugged daily even with those awful restraints. "Also, Vision? Did you know Ross had access to that collar?"
"No. I suppose I knew once it had already been placed on you by manner of inference, but not before. I did not know its mere presence was hurting you, either."
Wanda nodded, satisfied by that. "Okay. Thank you for telling me." The tension in the room was overwhelming, and she knew it was not really Tony's fault, as much as she wanted to blame him for all of it. She had added to it. So had Clint and Tony. The only innocent parties were Natasha and Vision, really. "I think that Nat and Vision should decide what to do. They have the most...objective views."
Natasha stared at the younger Avenger for a moment and then nodded. Wanda was surprisingly behaving quite reasonably in general; she had fully expected to potentially have to play referee between her teammates or help Wanda get out of the room if something did set her off. "While we appreciated the tip, I would like to know why it came so late," Nat said carefully. "You clearly wanted to help us, Tony. So I'd like details of what Ross was doing."
"Being all up in our business. Literally couldn't get a chance to contact you safely sooner." Tony sighed in annoyance. He did not, in fact, particularly want to help his ex-teammates right now; he was still angry. He just did not want them in trouble, either. There was a major difference between being frustrated and hurt with friends and coworkers and therefore avoiding them for awhile...and the abuse occurring on the Raft. At least that frustrating, stubborn, enhanced girl seemed to be behaving more or less like her normal self. "Come on, Romanoff, you knew I knew where your Norway safe house was all the time. Once I knew their location was irreparably compromised, I gave Ross the exact location so he would think I helped him."
I knew it. Unsurprised, Wanda returned to her spot on the sofa, where Vision tentatively put his arm around her again. ”I like hugs, remember?" Wanda didn't feel any mental reply, but she could sense Vision hold her more securely.
"I'm assuming there's been no way to alter those Accords," Clint said. "If you even want to."
Tony stood up. "Now wait a minute-"
"Stop, everyone, please," Vision put in calmly. "There is no need for any of us to denigrate any of us at present. What is done is done. I have been considering. While it would not be ideal, perhaps threatening Secretary Ross with the surveillance videos is an option. He need not know Wanda does not wish them to be used."
Four Avengers' heads gave him a thoughtful look. No one disagreed with this.
"He'll ask for proof, Vision," Clint pointed out. "Then we're back where we started, with Wanda having to be the one to deal with it, which is unfair."
Vision nodded. "It is unfair. However, she was one of four in the Raft. The footage has audio, does it not?"
"Poor quality audio, but yes," Natasha said quickly. "You're suggesting use video of one of the boys instead." Not as viscerally disturbing, but it could work.
"Yes. Wanda confided regarding the lack of food, for example. The rest of the team must have protested this. Moreover, they must have protested how she was mistreated. Perhaps-"
"Nat, the time they hit Sam for trying to help me," Wanda interrupted quickly. "Day 17. We should ask Sam first, but..." she trailed off. I'm safe here. I don't like Tony, but he isn't trying to hurt me now. The lingering sting from the burns on her neck wanted to claim otherwise, but she pushed those thoughts away, focusing on Vision gently holding her hand instead. Vision never minded touching her dangerous hands at all; in fact, it seemed as if he liked holding them. I am safe. I am okay. I feel better too.
If some bad thing happened, she could defend herself now. Even if she couldn't, the others would not leave her behind. She knew that.
Wanda stayed quiet, letting the ongoing conversation wash past her without processing it. Though she did not particularly feel distressed at the moment, precisely, the instinct to disassociate to stay calm remained for now. At some point, something shook her gently, and she flinched before realizing there were just friends with her. "I...am here. Sorry, I wasn't listening."
"That's okay. Vision said you seemed like you were somewhere else and was...concerned." Natasha wasn't sure how to describe what Vision felt, since his precise words had been the human girl I care for is not here right now; her mind is hurt. I believe she needs you. "Do you want something to eat?"
Wanda nodded, but then reached for her crutch and stood up, heading for the door and ignoring Tony entirely. I need a tiny bit of fresh air first. "I am going outside. Alone. Please don't follow me; I'll be right back," she said firmly.
Natasha shook her head slightly at both Vision and Clint about to protest, and followed Wanda to the door herself. "Wanda, do you really want to be alone, or just needed an excuse to get out of the living room?"
"Both," Wanda said honestly. "Can you tell the others I'm okay though? Please. I just...need a few minutes."
Natasha nodded in understanding. "Sure. Do you at least have your phone on you?"
"In my pocket."
"All right. Text, call, use your mind-messaging on Vision, I don't care, but contact us if you need anything."
"I will."
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Once outside, Wanda immediately relaxed. Though it was mostly dark, the moonlight cast shadows across the gravel driveway and the rustling trees, and she found herself mysteriously comforted by the sight. Maybe not so long ago being alone in the dark would have scared her all over again, but right now, it was okay. She could see. She could feel the fuzzy warm fabric of her hoodie against her skin, and despite it being chilly to her, it was not freezing or lonely out here. Even her splinted arm seemed to be a reminder, I am safe now, I don't need to be scared anymore, I'm not trapped somewhere unable to move again, because it really did feel much, much better by now.
On impulse, she lifted the bad arm and awkwardly ran her fingers over the smooth railing, and it did not make it hurt any more than its usual at this point deep ache. Maybe it really would be okay. Mostly she tried not to think about her arm at all, but she knew the others were still worried it wouldn't heal correctly since they hadn't been able to x-ray the injury or have a real doctor set it.
Welcoming lights shone from within the house, and it was pleasant to know she could go right back inside to her friends whenever she wished. Wanda slowly made her way a bit down the driveway where Lila and Cooper normally played, a light breeze ruffling her braids. Certainly she'd been outside many times since the rescue, but this was the first time she had gone for a walk on her own. Nat trusting her to be outside alone without supervision was a pleasant realization too. I should go back inside soon.
Wanda didn't trust herself to walk the entire length of the long winding driveway, and the uneven hillier portions might end up giving her issues too, so she only went to the hammock where Laura always told Lila and Cooper not to go any further if they were playing outdoors alone.
She turned when she heard someone calling her name, a bit startled and surprised she hadn't sensed anything, but it was just Cooper. "Mom won't let us eat until you come back inside," Cooper said. "She said I could come see what you were doing. Since it's been a few minutes."
"Just...thinking." And being happy I'm at least strong enough to walk out here by myself, finally. Wanda was relieved Cooper didn't question this and just walked beside her as they headed back to the house. "You don't have to wait for me. I know I'm still slow."
"That's okay. I wanted to ask you something anyway. It's a secret. Can you make Dad feel better? You have mind powers. He's acting weird," Cooper said simply. "I don't think he told Lila and me everything. I know that stupid prison really sucked. But Dad's been on sucky secret missions before, loads of times."
I don't know what to say. “I can't use my powers to do something like that," Wanda whispered. Rather, I could. I think. But it wouldn't be...real. Would it? Anyway, I won't do that.
"Won't."
"No, I won't. I don't think doing that is...right."
"Why not? It might help."
Wanda stopped walking and squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't...I don't want to warp anyone's mind again. I feel like even if I am giving someone good things, it's...it wouldn't be fair." She could sense Cooper being frustrated and puzzled, and she bit her lip. Then the realization that she could bite her lip now and not be hurting herself again struck her, and she shook her head hard. I need to calm down so I don't disturb Cooper. What on earth does my split lip being healed matter?
"I think I'd like good dreams instead of bad ones. Wouldn't you?"
"Yes..."
"Well, give me a really cool dream tonight. Something about dinosaurs, like riding one or something. Then if it works you could give Dad a good dream too tomorrow night."
Wanda smiled a bit and shook her head. "I'm not supposed to use mind tricks anymore. You know that; you asked me to do it to you last year and make you see something funny."
Cooper shrugged. "Yeah, I know. It could be a secret." He seemed entirely unbothered.
"You can ask him if he wants me to do it, but I won't without specific permission, okay?"
"I already did and he said no. He said it wasn't fair to you because you're the one that got all banged up on your mission. I don't understand. You guys have gotten hurt on missions a bunch of times."
Wanda felt far out of her league attempting to explain anything in a way that would make sense, but still not make Cooper upset or frightened. She certainly could not tell him precise details. "I think..." I know. "...he feels responsible for me. Imagine if you saw Lila or Nate hurt and you couldn't help them, and they couldn't help you or themselves. That would feel awful, right?"
"...Yeah. I'm sorry, Wanda. Am I making you feel like crap? Asking stuff?" Cooper questioned.
"No. I like being around you, Lila, and Nate. You make me feel like I have a family again. But different, because now I am the older one instead of the younger one." Wanda was surprised when Cooper hugged her, and then very unsurprised when he backed up, trying to act like he hadn't hugged her in the first place. "I like hugs, Cooper. It's okay," she said softly.
"Well, it's okay for you to like hugs. You're a girl."
"Somehow I think you wouldn't say that to Nat."
"She'd pin me on the floor in two seconds," Cooper said nonchalantly, "and you could, but you don't."
_________________
Upon going back inside, Wanda realized her little walk really had helped significantly. Between that and talking to Cooper, she felt like she could handle the group dinner, even though now she was physically tired. "I am okay," she assured Vision when he asked, and gave him a hug.
Vision was surprised Wanda had tried to hug him with her injured arm, but the confusing human girl he cared for did not seem to be hurting herself further in order to do so. Then he was happy when she left her crutch against the wall and let him help her to the table instead. "I am glad you are getting stronger," he said quietly in her ear.
This made Wanda smile. Sitting between Nat and Vision, she felt safe. She would just remain silent unless directly spoken to. The Panera Bread broccoli cheddar soup and baguettes were good, and thankfully it didn't irritate her sensitive throat, either. Next to her, Vision was, of course, not eating anything, but she had shakily touched his hand with her bad hand as best she could. Now he was just gently holding her hand, and she couldn't help feeling surprised that touching it was not making her damaged arm hurt worse. "Thank you for caring for me," she sent mentally.
Vision did not send a telepathic message back, remembering that Clint Barton had ordered him not to do that to Wanda anymore. "Is it acceptable to kiss you?"
Wanda's cheeks immediately grew hot as she stared at her plate. "Not here! Not in front of everyone. That's...private. And you can talk to me telepathically right now. I say it is okay.”
Lila looked at them with great interest, gulping her lemonade. "Prince Vision should take Princess Wanda outside. For a moonlit stroll. Like in a movie."
Laura quickly shushed Lila, but Lila only smiled innocently and went back to her lemonade.
"Perhaps you and Wanda could go out on the balcony deck or take a walk after dinner and discuss that privately," Natasha suggested smoothly, and that was the end of that.
The rest of the meal went fine, and Laura took the children upstairs to let the others finish planning without the little ones listening.
Wanda could feel herself flagging by now, not in a bad way exactly; she was just tired. But the conversation was thankfully short. Tony would call Ross, claiming he had a message from the rogues that they had security footage from the Raft. This would, of course, be technically true, but Nat would only give him the portion from day 17 Wanda had suggested earlier. The first demand would be for clemency for all of them, else they'd release the video themselves. Obviously this wouldn't work, so Tony's job would be to get it in writing to get Scott and Clint home. If he could get anything else accomplished, then great, but the rogue team only needed that much.
"If necessary, I might be bugging you, Little Red," Tony said seriously, despite using that nickname she hated. "You're the biggest threat even if you're still the green bean."
Wanda glared at him. "I am not a green bean." She wished very much that Sam had not good-naturedly called her that one time last year. At the time, she had not even understood the term at all until she asked Natasha to explain it.
"Youngest Avenger besides-" Tony coughed to disguise his mistake.
"Spider-Man," Wanda said contentedly, pleased to make him squirm so easily, "I know you are protecting him. He is lucky." Very lucky.
"As I was saying. Youngest Avenger, squishy wizard, newest. Green bean."
"Green bean took you down her first day training, remember," Wanda said, her eyes sharp. "I hate being called that."
To his credit, Tony did nod. "Okay, no more green bean. Just trying to add some levity here. I really might need to bug you."
"I understand." I have Nat here with me. I can handle one phone call if I have to.
_________________
"Do you need to go back inside?" Vision asked a little later, after everyone dispersed. Tony left, simply saying Vision should return by morning, and Natasha took Clint down to the rec room insisting that she needed a sparring partner.
Wanda knew quite well her friend had just done that so she could have a little while with Vision by herself.
"Wanda, I am concerned," Vision said now. He could tell Wanda was struggling on their 'moonlit stroll' Lila had suggested, but she kept insisting she was fine, even as she started leaning on him more rather than just holding his arm for balance. "You already took a walk earlier. This is too much." In seconds, the injured human girl stumbled and then collapsed.
"I...I'm okay," Wanda stuttered quickly, wrapping her arms around her middle again. "Please don't leave me. I don't want you to leave me again." I am not hurt. Or...not hurt any worse, at least. I'll make him feel bad, I should be quiet. The driveway gravel was digging into her knees, and she felt gentle arms wrapped around her, distracting her from everything else. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I know I am safe here."
Vision was hesitant to pick Wanda up without express permission, but she certainly could not walk back to the house right now; she was too tired. "May I pick you up?"
Wanda nodded, thinking that someone else would probably think she had collapsed on purpose so that he would offer that, but thankfully Vision understood that she hadn't. She closed her eyes and rested her head against his shoulder, exhausted but feeling okay otherwise.
"I am taking us up to the balcony deck," Vision said, thinking Wanda would not like if he flew anywhere holding her without being told first.
Wanda tensed, her magic stirring defensively inside just in case, but true to his word, Vision only flew them up to the balcony and carefully set her down on one of the reclining deck chairs. I shouldn't have been nervous just for that. I knew Vis wouldn't take me away from here, and I felt scared anyway. She could sense him about to ask something, and quickly just said, "You did not do anything wrong. I'm just being irrationally nervous."
"I do not find your feelings irrational, whether I understand them or not."
This made Wanda smile, and she patted the long chair next to her. "They probably are irrational, if you don't understand," she deadpanned, but that was a reassuring comment all the same. She hesitated and then added, "I, um...don't mind that question you asked during dinner one bit. You can if you want to." Is that okay to say? Nat would say it is, I think. She even suggested it, but we weren't even talking at all on our walk.
Vision continued looking at her thoughtfully for a moment, and then sat beside her, arm back around Wanda's shoulders. "You have made me feel quite strange. I believe this is what those characters in those unrealistic romantic drama movies are meant to feel."
Wanda didn't say anything to this, knowing he was referring to the Hallmark Channel movies Pepper often liked turning on back at the Compound, calling them a 'guilty pleasure' of hers. She scooted herself closer, wondering if she should do or say anything else. If Pietro was still here, he would tease her and tell her to hurry up and do something herself. Pietro had even for real teased her about Vision a year ago, even though Pietro barely knew him at all.
”Wanda, you have funny taste. I am going to kill him if he hurts you."
”I dare you to kiss him. The reactions'd be priceless."
At the time, Wanda had playfully smacked her twin and told him to shut up because they needed to finish getting ready to leave for that fateful battle and Pietro was being a pest, but she also remembered him hugging her too.
”I like teasing you, but I just don't want you hurt. I couldn't protect you so much already. I want you to be happy."
"Is it okay for me to kiss you?" Wanda asked quietly.
"Of course, if that would make you happy."
Wanda blinked in surprise at Vision, because he had gently kissed her uninjured hand, keeping the hurt arm carefully resting between them. "You don't...have to do that," she whispered. I put him through the floor at the Compound before.
"I am not scared of you, Wanda. Your hands are part of you. You are not going to hurt me," Vision informed her firmly. "Also, you do not need to be nervous. You are strong enough to throw me out if you wish."
Wanda smiled a bit, remembering the awkward No one dislikes you, Wanda line Vis had told her back at the Compound before Clint had come to fetch her. And for people to see you, as I do. “I don't wish. I love having you here." The chilly breeze made her shiver, but Vision was warm, and he was holding her close now. "Are you...emanating heat on purpose?"
"Yes. You are cold."
"I feel like I have a cozy blanket wrapped around me, but better." Wanda's voice had a tiny hint of laughter, and she happily relaxed. "This is for you," she added, and tilted her head to kiss his cheek innocently.
A quiet polite cough made both of them turn their attention to the sliding glass door. "Hi, Laura. Do I need to come inside?" Wanda asked.
"No, of course not. Nat and Clint are actually still in the basement working out. I just wanted to make sure you were okay since you weren't on the porch and never came back inside. I figured you might be out here. And you are, so I'll leave you alone. Vision, you better take good care of her." Laura smiled and slipped back inside.
"That was not a pleasant interruption."
"You just be grateful Clint did not come check instead," Wanda said, clearly amused. While she was not at all sorry for kissing him, she did not plan to share that information with Clint unless he specifically asked. "He would probably- definitely- be concerned and lecture you. I don't want to make him more upset anyway."
Notes:
I am so not confident writing romance, but at least Wanda and Vision are both a bit awkward, so it does not matter as much lol. I love them to bits xD
Any feedback is much appreciated!:)
Chapter 17: Chapter 17
Summary:
In which two team members have a deal confirmed, Wanda and Nat have confirmed plans for where they’re going to meet Yelena soon, and there is much WandaVision fluff:)
Notes:
Honestly this is a bit of a quiet interlude, along with the relationship fluff for Wanda and Vision:) You can probably easily predict where the main plot is heading next when Nat and Wanda go to see Yelena!
As usual, thank you for reading!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Natasha came upstairs after an intentionally long workout to find Vision sitting in the blue rocking chair primly, and Wanda asleep on her bed with a blanket very carefully folded around her. "Enjoying watching her sleep?" Nat deadpanned, knowing quite well he had certainly not done anything untoward to Wanda just because she had let herself fall asleep.
"No, I have been guarding Wanda because you were not here." Vision seemed to rethink this answer and amended, "Yes, it pleases me that she has granted me enough trust to allow herself to sleep." He stood up and then floated over to Wanda silently. "I can feel her mind, through the stone. She does not feel quite so smothered any longer."
"Smothered..?" Nat asked quietly.
Vision appeared to be processing and considering how to explain that. Besides, he did not want to wake Wanda up now, either. "Wanda's mind felt like there was something restraining her inside previously, locking her down. She seems healthier now."
"...Could you feel her with your infinity stone during those three weeks?"
Vision considered this, touching his own forehead and then studying sleeping Wanda. "I do not know precisely, but there were disturbing flashes whilst recharging. It felt as if I might be somewhere else being ripped apart and silently crying for help. I believed these flashes were my own equivalent of a nightmare, but if my interpretation is correct, those things were not merely nightmares. However, Wanda is not in pieces, of course, so perhaps I am wrong. You have been caring for her. Do you believe she will cease being in pain entirely soon?"
Natasha decided not to tease the concerned synthezoid this time. "Probably not, but she's fine. She's safe, she's getting stronger, and she feels much better than before. Don't fuss over her, Vision. She will hate it. Just treat her the same as you would have before."
"I do not wish to treat Wanda the same as before. She let me kiss her, and she reciprocated. It was quite pleasant."
Natasha smirked slightly. "I see. Well, that took long enough. You just make sure she's comfortable with whatever you two decide to do. No more incidents like with her hair."
Vision continued studying sleeping Wanda, eyeing her red braids. "Wanda has lovely hair. Those people should not have been yanking it," he stated in a strangely flat tone, and carefully adjusted the pillow he had tucked under Wanda's hurt arm before.
This made Wanda stir and wake up with a jerk, but she quickly relaxed. I am safe here. I must have fallen asleep out on the balcony deck and...Vis put me in here? The idea did not disturb her; she trusted that he wouldn't have done anything to her while she was sleeping, but she felt guilty for doing so and wasting their limited time together. "Sorry I fell asleep," she said sleepily. There was only Natasha and Vision here. She did not need to be frightened or anxious here, so there.
"Humans need sleep, especially ones healing from severe injuries," Vision answered, and happily accepted Wanda's hug. "I am glad you have awoken though, as I must leave soon."
Natasha watched them fondly, mostly just pleased to see Wanda happy and not quite so jumpy. Knowing the girl had been comfortable enough to fall asleep in the first place said much more than any hugs or kisses ever would.
________________
"What did you two do last night after dinner and Tony left?" Clint asked the next morning after breakfast.
Wanda paused in her own tiny morning exercise plan to simply walk the length of the balcony deck repeatedly until she was too tired. The smooth slats of the deck were easier than the uneven gravel of the hilly driveway, and she could practice walking a few steps without support while still knowing she could grab the railing again when she needed to. "A short walk outside in the driveway. I fell because I was so tired, and then Vis carried me up here. We sat on the balcony for a bit before I fell asleep," she explained briefly.
Clint was very sure Wanda was telling the truth but leaving things out. "Very vague," he commented.
Wanda hesitantly released the railing and walked the few feet over to her friend a bit shakily, who immediately took her arm and helped her sit. "I know I'm getting better, but it is taking too long," she muttered. "This is frustrating. My ankle doesn't even hurt anymore. I'm just...shaky. Balance all ruined."
"I'm glad it isn't hurting you anymore, at least." Clint thought hearing Wanda casually say her ankle no longer hurt was a big deal, because regardless of how much she claimed she was 'fine', it had been very obvious that the sore ankle still pained her before. He watched her turn to the little glass-topped table near the chair and lift the tray she'd left there with her magic and move it to her lap.
Wanda poured the cup of acorns out across the tray, and began methodically moving them one by one back into the cup. "Me too, but I still hate it. I just..." Wanda closed her eyes, struggling to find the right words. "I can't fix my head. I think...I think that I can't help hoping if I fix the outside of me, then maybe the rest will...fix too. And I sort of miss our missions, even if they were unpleasant often. I like helping people. Now I can't. I feel like a...one of those broken pool toys Cooper had to throw out because they weren't usable anymore. But..." she trailed off, and then just decided to tell the truth. "Then I have things happen that really do feel like things a normal girl my age might have. I was so happy last night. We didn't...do anything, really. But I was still me, and it didn't matter."
Clint saw a single tear fall to Wanda's lap and instantly wrapped her in a hug. "I don't know what you see in that robot, but-"
"He isn't a robot," Wanda interrupted firmly. "He has emotions and feelings just like you or me, and I think he...he cares for me. I don't know why, but he does. I don't mean like you and Nat do, either." I don't know how to explain. I'm trying.
"I'm glad he makes you happy, Wanda. I just...don't want you hurt yet again if he doesn't love you the same way back, or breaks your heart in some other way. I've seen you. You are deeply, deeply attached to the people you love, feel things very intensely, and you're very emotive even if you try not to be." Clint did not add that he rather thought throwing romance into that mix just accentuated that aspect of Wanda's personality. This morning her big green eyes had been practically glowing when she came downstairs for breakfast, and not the often glowing red from her powers when she was distressed or angry either. Then she'd whispered something in Natasha's ear that clearly amused her and made her happy, because she stifled a quiet giggle. "Exhibit A: your behavior at breakfast this morning."
Wanda blinked in surprise and went back to moving the acorns, though she was happy Clint stayed close to her. Company was good. Company meant she was not locked somewhere alone. "Vision kissed my hands," she said quietly. She twirled a bit of scarlet around her fingers and stared at it. "They ruin things. But he was not scared of them." I wasn't going to say anything, but I think I would rather just...share it than wait and have Clint find out later. He probably already knew, anyway.
Clint did not tell Wanda that he had quite frankly been very worried and assumed the two had jumped to much more than 'just' that. "This made you happy."
"Very much. I, um...I didn't think anyone could ever like me...that way. Not after...you know. I am not normal anymore." Wanda moved the acorn tray back to the table telekinetically and impulsively gave Clint a hug. "Thank you. I think Papa would be glad I can talk to you since he isn't...here."
Clint found Wanda hugs special, since while she did enjoy hugs very much, she was picky with who could have them. Reserved, quiet Wanda including him in her circle she deemed safe to hug meant a lot, especially when she then just casually compared him to her father, even after those miserable weeks trapped in the Raft. "You might be bigger than Lila, but you still remind me of her. She just talks more than you."
Wanda didn't add her immediate thought, and she can't mind-control or kill people with a thought, because right now that did not matter; she was safe and in control of herself and her magic, too. "Let's practice like back at the Compound. You liked sparring with Nat yesterday, right?"
Clint sighed. "It was refreshing, yes. Still don't want you overdoing things though. Promise you'll tell someone if you feel tired?"
I almost always feel at least a little tired now, Wanda thought, but she nodded. "If it feels like I'm hurting myself, I will tell you."
______________
Much to Wanda's relief, Clint agreed to let her practice with both Natasha and himself out in the woods on the hill behind the vacation house. Wanda still could not really handle climbing a hill on her own, but as Nat pointed out, dealing with working together with one team member injured was technically very useful practice anyway. "Maybe I could just put up a shield and end any danger there," Wanda deadpanned. "If you are carrying me, I can protect us."
Natasha smiled but shook her head. "You could, but let's have you catch Clint's arrows instead. I've got you, so don't worry about falling. We already know you can create shields; you did that even during the Raft escape. We need to increase your reflex speed and practice less obvious skills than encasing yourself in a force field. Not only that, none of us can neutralize a threat if you're protecting us that way."
"Okay."
"And don't try using your magic with the fractured arm yet. I know you feel better, but I don't want you re-injuring it, either."
"...Okay." Wanda scanned the woods, looking for Clint. An arrow thunked into a tree trunk a couple feet away, and she knew he was just purposely aiming close but not right at Natasha and herself, for obvious reasons.
"Find him mentally," Nat said quietly. "You can do that without poking into his head, like when you sensed the raccoons before." She pulled Wanda into a small copse of brush and shrubby bushes and ducked further inside with her.
"I'm not supposed to use any mind tricks," Wanda said, surprised. I did that too much during the Raft escape and then I wanted to do it to those people at the hotel. I feel like I shouldn't do it at all.
"Pretty incompetent villain out here," Clint called. "If they're half as good a shot as me, you two would be caught by now."
Natasha ignored this and gently rested her hands on Wanda's shoulders. "Fury isn't here now. I've changed my mind, and I'm sure Sam and Steve would agree if you asked them. Arguably this is not mind tricks regardless. I want you to sense him, not do anything to his head. You do that much on instinct often."
"And you feel comfortable at the idea of me doing that to you?" Wanda asked softly. I know Nat cares about me, but I also know she wouldn't feel comfortable with that.
"Wanda, you do it to me fairly often passively. I know you do. It's okay. If you can do it passively, you can do it by choice, too," Nat told her.
Clint's head popped into their little hideout, and Wanda instinctively pushed him out with her magic. "Let me in," he called. "Timeout on practice."
"Oh...sorry." Wanda dispersed the scarlet wisps and scooted away from the opening, leaves crunching beneath her.
"You're okay?" Clint asked. When Wanda nodded, Clint raised one eyebrow and just stared at her. "Then, you should have easily caught me, busted arm or not. This isn't no-magic sparring. Not right now. Either you're not ready for this yet, or you're holding back. Explain."
I don't know. “I feel guilty," Wanda said finally. This was not the same as just playing with Lila and Cooper, or telepathically talking to Vision, or using her magic to help support herself walking when she was tired.
"You've been saying you wanted to practice 'properly' for awhile," Clint said gently. "Does it have anything to do with feeling less than generous about what you'd like to do to Ross?"
"...I don't know. I suppose. I wanted to mind-control him. On the Raft. And now I wonder if I should have. If I could have gotten us out."
"If you could have, then that asshole is lucky you were merciful and didn't shred him," Clint answered. "I suspect you could have at the beginning and none of us knew how, just not...later on."
Wanda nodded; she agreed with that assessment completely. All she really would have needed to do was mind-control the guards aboard the helicopter taking them to the Raft. Then she would have still been shocked once in order to accomplish that much, yes, but after that, she would have been able to rip the deactivated collar off herself...and force the pilot(s) to say or do whatever was necessary to not complete the prisoner transport and prevent the helicopter from being shot down. But no, she refused to use that mind-control as per previous instructions, and there had been nothing else at her disposal to do. And that's basically what Nat told me immediately. “Let's try again. I will do my job this time."
__________________
Much to Wanda's surprise, Vision called her in the afternoon while the vacation house group was all out by the pool. "Hello. I didn't expect to hear from you again so soon, but I'm glad," she greeted him.
"I suppose you might not be as glad when you hear the current news. The footage clip Ms. Romanoff sent over immediately pulled strings. Hawkeye and Falcon are cleared for house arrest, for an as yet undetermined amount of time. Mr. Wilson would have to turn over his suit," Vision began.
Wanda frowned and caught Natasha's glance, nodding for her to come over to her. "Vis, I am putting the call on speaker. What about Scott? Sam doesn't even want to cut a deal," Wanda reminded him.
"The problem is Mr. Lang's previous criminal record. I believe with more time, his should be pushed through as well. But we wished to update you." Vision paused, and Wanda knew he must be thinking.
"I know there is more," Wanda said quietly.
"Secretary Ross denies any condoning of the way you were being treated and claims ignorance, which makes him appear incompetent but not criminal. No one has any issue with those...inhumane restraints, but it seems many government and UN individuals do have an issue with other incidents occurring in that prison."
"Vision. Keeping someone restrained like that for weeks is in of itself torture," Natasha snapped. "You can tell Tony and the entire UN that. If you need to take advantage of the more obvious torture that was happening there, then do it. But you make damn sure you don't let anyone forget what was happening literally constantly."
"Romanoff, the problem is that they believe that some concessions must be made regarding human rights laws because she's an unpredictable, unstable, very powerful enhanced," Tony put in now. There was a brief complaint from Vision saying that Tony was interrupting. "She's a walking nuke, that's just a fact. On top of that, she's also in a pinch because she isn't technically a US citizen. And she has no visa. Forget windbag Ross, that's making it difficult too. What Vision is trying to say nicely is that we've got that Damian guy fired. But all we've got for Wanda herself is that if she handed herself in peacefully, she wouldn't be interrogated or tortured again constantly in the Raft, aside from the restraints themselves."
"Why the hell would I agree to that?" Wanda snapped.
"Chill, Little Red, I don't expect you to do that. I'm just updating you. Obviously you're much safer as a fugitive," Tony shot back immediately, in an uncharacteristically kind voice he never used on her.
Wanda sighed, ignoring the milder now but still lingering pain in her ribs. "Tony, stop attempting to help cut me a deal," she said quietly. "You are not going to be able to do anything for me that...that I would agree to, and you trying to...help me, is going to make it more difficult for you to stay on...on Ross's good side." Oh wait, he doesn't have one, Wanda thought, but she didn't add that.
"Thought you'd be willing to stay at Hawkeye's on house arrest."
Wanda's eyes grew hot with tears, and she scooted closer to Natasha, who put an arm around her shoulders. I would. I definitely would. I would stay there permanently if I had to, if Clint and his family wanted me. “Nobody will let me," she choked out finally.
"Tony, she's right. While that's a nice thought, it isn't going to happen. If you're getting into red tape with Scott, who isn't even enhanced, you're certainly not going to be able to help Wanda," Natasha said firmly. "Don't bother with me, either. I don't want any deal anyway. The two of us are messy to deal with. Scott isn't, in comparison."
"You and Little Red are going to have to leave that house if Barton goes home," Tony warned. "Not because I don't want you there, to be clear. Vision and I will move some money around and dump some in an off-shore account under one of your aliases."
Natasha took a deep breath and glanced at Wanda. "Sounds fine. Thank you."
"It doesn't, in fact, sound fine."
"God, Tony, money isn't really the problem, though we do appreciate that very much. It isn't you. I'm just thinking how to help Wanda stay hidden once we do leave, that's all. She's much better, but not ready to travel easily, either."
"Eh, if she's with you, she'll be fine. Give this a few more days and we should have Lang's deal through."
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Over the next several- not few- days, the calm daily routine in the vacation house continued, with Wanda practicing disguising her natural accent with Natasha and eagerly practicing her magic outdoors with both Clint and Nat. The long uneven driveway began to look not quite so daunting; and while she still couldn't go running with the others, she did take gradually longer walks with Cooper and Lila instead, which seemed to help.
Twenty-fourth day since the rescue, Wanda thought, staring at herself dressed in her hero suit, just sans long jacket, in the bathroom mirror. I have been out of there for longer than I was stuck there. She was glad nearly everything was healed entirely by now, all except the leftover itchy marks across her neck, though it did look much better now...and her arm, which remained contained in its splint, though she had been trying to use her bad hand more for small things anyway. "If I leave here, I am not going to get us caught. I won't," she ordered herself.
"Are you all right?" Nat called from outside the bathroom. "You're taking an awfully long time in there."
Wanda quickly opened the door. "Sorry, I was just thinking. I know we will have to leave almost any day now, and, well..." she put her hand to her neck. I hate it and I'm scared someone will put two and two together if they see me. The two small areas where she suspected those prongs painfully dug into her skin the worst had left angry raised scars, but the rest just looked pink and blotchy now and looked better every time she studied it.
Natasha gave her a critical look and didn't question why her younger teammate had decided to don her suit all of a sudden. "That isn't so bad, Wanda, really. Looks like that cream Vision brought you before is helping quite a bit. How's it feeling now?"
"Itchy. I just...I don't know. I shouldn't care, but I still do anyway. Nat, I still can't even get my arm into the coat." And I had to use my magic to put the top on. Wanda looked more annoyed than upset, which Natasha was honestly glad to see. Annoyed Wanda meant she was more okay than not.
"We're not doing any missions until your arm heals completely anyway. I've seen you using it more, and we adjusted that lock hinge a few days ago so you can use your elbow a bit. Don't rush it, and please don't take that splint off yet."
Wanda experimentally moved the tender elbow the small amount the splint had been adjusted to allow her to, and bit her lip. "I won't. Moving it hurts. Don't tell Clint that, because I might have let him think it didn't." She shrugged and walked back into the bedroom, happy that she could at least do that much easily without support now. "Did Yelena text you back?" I know Nat has been trying to set something up for us, but we're still just stuck in limbo for now.
"She has. What do you think of hiding out at Melina's for a little while?" Natasha suggested. "I still have...mixed feelings about her, but I do trust her not to turn us in. It was Yelena's idea. Otherwise, it's just a matter of us picking a safe house. You've seen our list. As far as I'm concerned, you can pick."
"A colder area would be better to hide me," Wanda mused aloud. "And I would love to meet Yelena. I just...I hope she doesn't hate me." I wouldn't like me. Nat hasn't been able to come visit her in weeks because of me.
Nat decided not to share that while Yelena was clearly interested in meeting Wanda, she also continued calling her 'Nat stealer' in messages. "She's not going to hate you, and you just remember that two of you being around doesn't mean I care any less. So...go to Melina's? I do want to warn you that Alexei is there and he can be a bit much, to say the least."
"Is he going to turn us in?"
"Absolutely not. He's a narcissistic obnoxious character, and he'll be infuriating to be around, but he would not do that to us. If anything, he would happily defend us if there was trouble."
Wanda smiled a little and nodded. "Okay. I trust you. What about Sam and Steve?"
"They'll stay in France for now unless something happens. Like Steve pointed out when we all video chatted yesterday, they're in a tourist trap right now. They can blend in as dumb American tourists there. Your disguised accent isn't perfect, but it's already fairly decent, so once we leave here, use that. Then when we do reach Europe, switch." Privately, Natasha wished she had practiced that with Wanda months ago, but back at the Compound, Wanda had always either been cast as the 'I don't speak much English' undercover role, or she was speaking Russian or German, both of which the girl sounded much more natural speaking than English. Or, it was simply a mission where the team needed Wanda's firepower and her accented English did not matter in the first place. "For the two of us, it will be easy to blend in Russia. Cap and Sam...not so much."
Wanda nodded, feeling a bit excited about the plan along with the anxiousness that would not go away. Maybe...maybe we can actually do this.
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Vision reappeared at the vacation house the next day in his human disguise, with a vehicle after messaging Wanda first, saying he would love to take her out somewhere nearby. Wanda's initial gut reaction was to say absolutely not, too dangerous, but Natasha suggested going to a drive-in movie, which sounded fun and such a normal thing to do that Wanda grew excited even before Vision said yes or no. That was something she had seen on her vintage sitcoms, and she honestly hadn't even realized any still existed now.
"There's one about an hour or so from here. Glen Drive-In Theatre," Natasha said casually, looking quite pleased with the idea. "Little interaction with others, Wanda can practice disguising her accent, and you two can spend time together safely on your own."
Wanda smoothed her simple black dress and fiddled with the soft light scarf Nat had given her awkwardly, unsure if she should say something else or not. Natasha had also done a small waterfall braid in her hair and lightly curled the rest, leaving it in loose red waves over Wanda's shoulders.
Wanda suspected Nat simply enjoyed helping set up a date, especially since Nat knew the idea made Wanda happy.
Clint sighed very deeply but just patted Wanda's shoulder. "I don't like this, but I still want you to have fun. You call us if you need anything. I don't care what it is. Even if you just feel uncomfortable, please let us know."
Wanda worried Vision might be offended, but he only nodded. "Mr. Barton, I will bring Wanda back immediately if she is no longer enjoying herself. I promise."
Clint nodded and gave her a little push toward the door. "Go enjoy yourself. You deserve it."
Hearing that about something good instead of someone spitting this is what you deserve at her on the Raft made her feel like crying, but she turned and just hugged Clint as tightly as she could. "I don't...know if I can believe that yet, but thank you for saying it," she whispered. I do want to be happy. I'm trying.
This time Clint did not attempt arguing with her; he merely hugged her back and told her he would keep saying it until she did believe it.
_________________
Once in Vision's vehicle, a nondescript sedan this time, Wanda realized she did not have Natasha here to make it less anxiety-inducing. She sat stiffly in her seat hugging herself and staring at the floor debating how to explain herself. Say something, she ordered herself. "I don't- don't like seatbelts now. Can...can we open the window?"
Vision was confused, but quickly opened the window just as Nat came over from the porch. "Do you wish to remain here instead?"
"...No."
"Wanda, do the same thing we've done a dozen times over the past week or so. You don't need me," Natasha said, leaning her elbows on the open window.
Wanda understood what Nat meant easily. Over the past several days, Natasha had brought her out to the charcoal SUV every day and simply had her sit in it with her seatbelt on for a few minutes each time. It was, admittedly, a little better than before and not quite so horribly unpleasant. "I'll try."
"Of course you will. Vision, you pull over and comfort her if she panics, you hear me? You better take good care of her and treat her properly."
"Properly...? What else would I do with Wanda?" Vision thought it was obvious that he should take care of Wanda, especially if she was upset. "Obviously, I should take care of her. I have invited her out and wish her to be happy."
"Oh good god, forget it," Natasha muttered, but she was smiling. "You two have fun."
Wanda managed to fasten the seatbelt herself, her gaze on her friend while she mentally listed sensory things of the immediate surroundings. This is not so bad. And...it helps that simply sitting here isn't making my ribs hurt so badly now, either. She waved at Natasha, Clint, Laura, and the children all outside.
The driveway itself was still not exactly pleasant, but it was still so much better than when she and Nat had to leave the vacation house temporarily before. Once she and Vision were out on the road, she just said, "Thank you for inviting me to do something...normal."
"Of course. Your company is always enjoyable. Do you consider this a date? According to my research, couples often go to movies together."
"Yes, but..." Wanda considered how to explain for a moment. "It's a date because of how I feel about you, not because we are going to a movie. I could go see a movie with Nat or Clint, and it wouldn't be a romantic date outing."
"But my brain does not produce dopamine and norepinephrine, and I believe I am feeling the same or equivalent emotions towards you regardless of that." Vision reached for Wanda's hand and then thought he should probably maintain safety with both hands on the steering wheel. "I do not wish to be unable to reciprocate the emotions you are willing to show me."
"Vis, I don't even know what those things are. Maybe your brain produces something else that we don't have a name for yet. You are unendingly kind to me and you...you kissed my hands. Someone willing to do that to someone like me doesn't...not have human emotions," Wanda said firmly, and quickly swiped at her eyes before any tears could fall. I don't know how to explain any better. She hesitated again and finally just finished telepathically instead. ”I can't explain how much that meant to me. Especially after I couldn't move for so long because I am dangerous. It made me feel like a normal girl. That I am not just what they made me. Someone willing to care for me like that has human emotions, period."
Vision privately decided he would hold and kiss Wanda's delicate hands, those same hands also capable of ripping vibranium apart, all the time if that made her so happy. "Why do you refer to yourself in such a derogatory manner even when you are happy?" He could easily sense that Wanda was genuinely content and mostly relaxed at the moment.
I don't know. "Because it's...true. I am still me, I think. I know I can't control people being scared of me, not unless I literally mind-control them of course. Knowing that still hurts anyway, even if I am happy otherwise." Wanda spoke slowly, carefully switching to her disguised accent voice that Natasha wanted her to practice.
Vision's immediate reaction was, "Wanda, what did you do to your voice? You sound different."
"Practicing my American accent to help disguise my natural one."
"Oh." Vision considered this for a moment. He understood that Wanda disguising her Sokovian accent would make it easier for her to hide, but he also liked hearing her natural accent all the same. "You are doing a good job, though I do enjoy hearing your natural voice."
Wanda smiled at that. "If you told me what I would be doing now a month ago, I would have thought I was just dreaming," she told him. She touched her curled hair and then ran her fingers over the dress. While under ordinary circumstances she would, admittedly, have accessorized the simple dress much more, Wanda still felt pretty, just like Natasha had insisted she would. Before Vision had arrived, Nat made her look at the finished ensemble in the mirror, saying she would surprise herself.
A month ago she had still been trapped in that underwater prison cell, scared and hurt. That girl definitely would have thought she was just imagining things.
Vision knew exactly what Wanda meant, and he carefully removed one hand from the steering wheel to squeeze Wanda's hand. "You are safe now. This is real."
"I know. I'm glad."
__________________
They rode in a pleasant silence the rest of the trip, and Wanda was just content to sense Vision's presence with her. Though she still didn't like riding in the car, she felt more or less okay about it right now. This was safe, and while she could tell Vision knew she was still a bit anxious, he didn't question it either.
Vision found the drive-in theater easily, and once settled, pulled the two collapsible chairs Laura had found in the vacation house for them, and set them up in front of the car. "Do you want anything to eat?" he asked.
Wanda shook her head. "I just want to sit with you." Vision couldn't eat anything, and she didn't want to ask for popcorn or anything like that just for herself. She was hesitant to get out of the car at all, but Vision offered her his hand and hugged her close the second she accepted. I am here, I am safe, and I am doing something so ordinary and normal it's special to me.
"You look lovely," Vision said softly in her ear.
"See, don't you like me better like this than when you first came to visit?"
"No, unless you are merely addressing the fact that you feel better. You feel better here," Vision told her quietly, touching Wanda's forehead lightly. Then he thought he should have asked before doing that, but Wanda didn't seem to mind; she just buried her face in his shoulder and stayed very still hugging him.
”I do feel better. Thank you." Wanda thought Vision's comment was sweet. While she genuinely enjoyed dressing up and doing so made her feel better about herself no matter what Vision said, it was still reassuring to her that he did not seem to care what she was wearing at all. ”Obviously you don't have to if you don't want to, but I am just reminding you it's okay to talk to me this way."
Vision grabbed the blanket from the car in case it was too chilly (also provided courtesy of Laura), guided Wanda to their chairs, and sat down with her, draping the blanket around both of them. He genuinely did not feel cold at all, but Wanda was just wearing her lightweight black dress, and he knew she seemed to feel chilled more easily since the Raft. Vision wasn't sure why, but he didn't want her to be cold, either. ”You are sure this is acceptable? I don't wish to intrude," he ventured carefully. "You know I can sense your feelings more if you let me do this."
Wanda didn't answer, telepathically or otherwise, for a few minutes. She just rested her head on Vision's shoulder and stayed as close as she could. The paranormal comedy movie seemed funny, but she was not particularly paying all that much attention to it, either, content to simply be there. Finally she simply replied, ”That's okay. You usually sense how I feel anyway."
"I do not wish to intrude. I know you like your privacy, but as long as you are certain." Vision was extremely relieved that Wanda remained at ease and didn't seem anxious or upset now at all. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze and received a contented sigh in response.
No one bothered or even approached them throughout the movie, and they were able to leave the drive-in smoothly with no issue whatsoever. Vision even helped with the seatbelt issue, unintentionally making Wanda laugh by saying, "This is illogical, so I will help you process this fear so that it no longer distresses you." This reasoning was so matter-of-fact and sensitive coming from Vision that it inherently helped her feel better about it.
Wanda texted Nat to say they were leaving, just for safety purposes. Certainly she and Vision could take care of themselves if they did run into trouble, but she wanted to make sure her friend knew what she was doing all the same, just in case.
"Did you like the movie?" Vision asked once they were back on the road.
"It was okay. One of the characters looked sort of like Thor, if he had glasses," Wanda commented, sounding quite amused. "But I would have been happy with any movie. I just...I really, really enjoy being with you. I've never had a real date before. This is perfect to me." Absolutely perfect.
Notes:
In case anyone’s wondering, it’s 2016 and yes, Vision took Wanda to see Ghostbusters that had Chris Hemsworth in it LOL. I decided to reference Thor for obvious reasons because it amused me:)
Glen Drive-In Theatre really does exist in NY a little over an hour from where I’ve decided Tony’s vacation house is! I haven’t been there myself, but I wanted to make sure a drive-in theater of some kind existed in the area since there aren’t many of those left. I felt like 1)That was a safe thing for them to do and 2)It’s something that would make Wanda very very happy considering how we see drive-ins on shoes like The Brady Bunch and The Partridge Family, etc
Any feedback is much appreciated!!<3
Chapter 18: Chapter 18
Summary:
In which Wanda and Vision spend a bit more time together before the rogues prepare to leave the vacation house (for good this time) and head to the airport.
Notes:
Heh, I’m so excited:) We’re on the move and about to reunite the rogues soon- and have Yelena show up (finally!). I hope you enjoy!
I did want to mention that I’m planning to do at least some of AMonthofWhump’s Winter Whumperland 2022 prompts (I love that they’re designed so we can do angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, or a mixture thereof!), so if the next Aftermath chapter is later than usual, that’s why! I have ideas heheheh.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
When they arrived back at the vacation house, Wanda continued feeling like she might be part of one of the TV shows she liked so much as Vision helped her out of the car and led her to the door. "I feel spoiled," she announced, clearly still happy and content. She tugged Nat's light scarf off, still disliking things being on her neck, but there was nothing else to do to conceal the burn marks, and at least it had not ruined the evening by any means.
Vision did not think he was spoiling Wanda at all, but he didn't want to take away from her good mood either. "You are a very pleasant date companion. I am glad you enjoyed yourself also, as I have never had a date, either."
Much to Wanda's surprise, she abruptly felt a sense of relief mixed with sadness from Vision, and she immediately put her hand to her neck. "I can hide it again, I just don't really like things being...on it anymore."
"No, you do not need to hide that," Vision answered, gently folding Wanda into his arms again and just holding her. She had said so many times that hugs were okay, so he would take every opportunity to give her more hugs. "It looks much better. Does it still hurt?"
"A little bit sometimes, but mostly it just itches." This was the truth, and Wanda did not think that was minimizing it at this point. She felt Vision's hand on her back, and she wondered if he could feel that there were scars there too through her thin dress. I don't want to explain those. I feel like I should, but I don't want to. Wanda decided she was not going to mention it, but she did not think he would mind.
Vision thought he had done far too much research attempting to find anything that could potentially heal the human girl's damaged skin more quickly, because all he had taken away from said research was that burns to the neck were particularly dangerous. "You can move it normally?" he asked hesitantly.
This made Wanda give him a strange look. "...yes? Nat made me do that all along even when it hurt so bad it made me cry. Vis, I'm okay. It still looks bad, but please believe me. Don't fuss. I hate that." She quickly nodded and shook her head to demonstrate that she was fine.
Vision remembered Natasha saying not to fuss over Wanda because she would hate it. He had not thought he was fussing over her, but clearly Wanda did. Selfishly, he realized he really, really would like to run his fingers through Wanda's wavy red hair, but he refused to ask. If she never wanted her hair stroked again, that was just how it would be; he was not going to ask her and make her feel guilty for saying no...or worse, risk her saying yes but then feeling uncomfortable all over again. "Is kissing you here acceptable today?" Vision touched Wanda's cheek lightly.
Wanda's green eyes sparkled mischievously. "You can assume that is always safe unless I say otherwise," she said immediately. She could tell Vision was being extra careful with her still-healing arm, and that made her happy too. Warm strands of scarlet settled peacefully in Wanda's chest, and she sighed. I am safe here. I will have to leave with Nat soon, but it's safe. Is this what Pepper's movies are supposed to be like? I think it is. Wanda did not particularly think of herself as a romantic, acknowledging that she was rather pessimistic all the time in hopes she wouldn't end up disappointed; but she also knew if someone asked what she really wanted in life, what she really wanted was simply a safe home and a family to love and be loved in return. Maybe children eventually...two, just like Pietro and herself, and she wanted to give them the stable life she and her own brother couldn't have after losing their parents.
"You are thinking something that makes you happy," Vision whispered in her ear, and then pressed a gentle kiss to Wanda's cheek, right where he remembered there was a scrape and dark bruise previously, though that was gone now. Then he grew alarmed when she grabbed a fistful of his shirt in her fist and buried her face in his shoulder. "Wanda, I- I am sorry, are you all right?"
"I'm fine." Wanda's voice was muffled since she didn't move. "It just was...a lot. A good kind of lot." I just felt an awful lot all of a sudden and it's silly and I am safe here and I have Vis holding me and I am happy. “Are you coming inside?"
"Only if you wish me to do so."
"Please. I don't want you to go unless you have to."
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Once upstairs in the bedroom Wanda still shared with Nat, Wanda retrieved the plain t-shirt and sweatpants from under her pillow. Natasha was sitting on the floor attempting to teach Lila how to play chess upon the little girl's request. Nat smiled at Wanda, glad that she seemed content for now. It was obvious Wanda was tired- she had retrieved her crutch from where she'd left it against the wall again, which she usually didn't need at all except on extended walks now- but she was smiling and her eyes looked genuinely peaceful for once. "Vis will tell you exactly what we did, Nat," she told Natasha happily, and disappeared into the bathroom.
Lila beamed and clapped her hands. "Auntie Nat, you were right, you said Wanda would be happy," she announced. "She is sad a lot," Lila told Vision knowingly. "I like to see Wanda make a happy face."
Vision nodded. "Yes, you are right. I am pleased a movie outing made her smile."
"Vision, I don't think whatever movie you two saw is what made her smile. She likes being with you," Natasha said firmly.
Wanda silently listened from in the bathroom as she stubbornly maneuvered the pajamas on without using her magic to help, which made her bad arm hurt, but she didn't care. She knew quite well Nat would help if she asked for it, but at this point she felt well enough that the injury was starting to annoy her rather than be distressing in any way. She did not want help.
She carefully folded her dress and left that on the floor by the sink, thinking she could wash it out later. Then she slipped back into the bedroom. "I didn't even hear Lila leave. Where did she go?" Wanda asked Nat.
"I told her I'd go play with her in her room. You and Vision can stay here as long as he can remain at the house without raising suspicion."
"The transponders for Mr. Stark and myself have been conveniently glitching when outside the Compound. The signal cannot be repaired," Vision explained. "Therefore I can stay as long as I please as long as I return from...patrolling before noon tomorrow."
Natasha laughed. Despite Vision's serious expression and matter-of-fact delivery, she knew quite well these 'glitching' signals were not a coincidence. "I see. Wanda, I'll be with Lila if you need me."
"Okay."
Vision was unsure what Wanda wanted him to do, so he stood where he was looking awkward until Wanda patted the bed next to her. "You are sure?"
"Yes...? You sit with me lots of times before. I like being close." Wanda gave him a puzzled look and immediately hugged him once he sat beside her. This is safe. This makes me feel safe. “I'm so tired, but I feel...good right now. Thank you for everything. I don't think you should stay too much longer though- I can't do my job yet. You can."
"Do you want me to leave, Wanda?" Vision asked quietly. The way she had curled up still clutching him made him think the answer must be no, but he also did not want to overstay his welcome, either.
"No, but if you are supposed to be 'patrolling', there might be another girl in trouble you could easily help. Vis, I'm safe here. I love having you visit, but staying with me isn't protecting anyone. It feels selfish." Wanda did not sound at all upset, just resigned. "Your fragile weapon of mass destruction can't go do her job yet. I want you to help people for both of us."
"...Mine? What does you calling yourself that and those other identifiers mean?" Vision looked down at Wanda curiously; she seemed not to realize any significance to dropping that phrase at all and was just tracing his nails with her good hand at the moment, which made him feel strangely tingly all over. "Is it normal for a human girl to refer to herself as belonging to the being she cares for in a romantic manner?"
"I don't know. I just mean I don't ever want anyone else that way," Wanda said quietly. "I do not care what other people do." Maybe I shouldn't have said that. Did I confide too much too quickly? I don't even know.?Wanda knew quite well she could be a bit...much to deal with, and she did not want to chase Vision away from her by being clingy, either. But he only held her closer and seemed slightly concerned and confused, not put off.
Vision blinked, studying Wanda thoughtfully. "I do not wish you to be unhappy should something occur to cause me to deactivate," he said finally. "I can feel you, here," he touched her forehead lightly, "and I am glad you are healing, but I believe you are very attached to Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, and...myself."
"Probably too much," Wanda mumbled, but the warm red arms wrapped around her didn't tense or push her away.
"I did not say that. I am saying I do not want you to be hurt if something sinister befalls your closest friends."
I wouldn't want to exist anymore if the people I loved were all gone. That isn't me being morbid, it just...is. Instead of telling Vision that, which she knew would make him upset, Wanda just said, "That is what loving people does. You are hurt if something happens to them. I think that is just...being human. You felt sad when you saw me when you came to visit the first time because I was still hurt so badly, remember? I could feel it."
Vision nodded, remembering quite well. Seeing Wanda hurt made his synthetic heart do strange things and made him want to hold her close in hopes it would comfort her. Of course, seeing any innocent human hurt was distressing, but still; this one was different. Wanda might be capable of mass destruction, but it seemed so few people were willing to see anything other than her enhancements, which was unfair and illogical to him. She was funny and kind; she loved children; she was sensitive and loyal to a fault. Moreover, he thought he would not be much distressed should someone like Secretary Ross come to harm; and he knew if that man harmed Wanda again, he would be made incapable of doing so immediately, law or no law. At least she was much, much better now, even if she was not really 'okay' yet, either.
"Well, what you felt is how I feel about losing you. You have deemed me worth the risk."
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Clint knocked despite the open door before poking his head into the room a little while later to see both girl and synthezoid silently sitting together, not watching anything on TV nor doing anything else besides hugging. "You two want anything?" he asked quietly. Though he still did not particularly like Vision hanging around, at this point he did trust that Vision would not harm Wanda intentionally at least. The fact that neither of them minded him checking on her seemed to confirm this.
"Will you stay too? I know Nat and I will have to leave soon, and then I won't get to see you anymore." Wanda stretched and uncurled herself from where she had been sitting, tugging Vision with her. "See, I told you he wouldn't hurt me."
Clint found Wanda's request a bit odd, considering most people Wanda's age would most certainly not want any mentor/parent figure around on their date, but wasn't going to say that. "Why don't I put in one of the shows you like, and all of us watch in the living room downstairs until he has to go?"
"Okay." Wanda glanced at Vision, hoping he would not mind, and was delighted when he squeezed her hand and willingly agreed.
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The next morning (day twenty-six, she noted) Wanda awoke late, for her; Nat was in their bathroom washing something. "Nat, is that my dress? I was going to take care of that."
"It is. I know you were, but I saw it on the floor and figured I'd take care of it for you. You made Vision very happy last night, by the way. He stayed until you fell asleep downstairs, but then he said you wanted him to leave after that? So Clint brought you back up here and that was that."
Wanda smiled a bit. That sounds about right. “I'm surprised I didn't wake up because you all moved me," she whispered, but she had been so tired and happy last night that it did make sense. "Nat, what exactly are we going to take when we leave?"
"You take your backpack and if you feel comfortable carrying it, the duffel Sam packed for you before. If you can't fit everything, leave what doesn't fit out and I will find a place for it." Natasha knew Wanda didn't really care about material possessions much, but she didn't want to take anything else away from her yet again. Between the apartment bombing when she was little, living on the streets, Hydra, the destruction of Novi Grad, and now being ripped away from her new home back at the compound; Natasha wanted to make sure her friend didn't have to lose the little she had all over again. "Anything else we might need, we'll either buy it or it will be at Melina's once we get there. Don't worry," Nat told her.
"I'm scared I won't be able to handle the airport," Wanda admitted quietly. And mess up and get us caught. An airport is a lot more than just going to a drive-in movie like Vis and I did. "And forgetting me, I'm scared our false passports won't work. Or that someone will find the extra identities."
Natasha looked her right in the eyes. "You will not mess up at the airport. We'll stick together and you can keep your earbuds in if it will help shut the noise out from strangers' phones or anything else. As for the papers, they'll go in the lining of my suitcase. I've done it many times before." She gave Wanda a critical look and added gently, "Give yourself some credit. You know how to blend in."
Wanda sighed and began brushing her hair with her good hand. I know. I'm still worried.
Lila came bounding in unannounced a minute later dressed in her swimsuit again. "I want to go swimming," she announced, barreling into Natasha with a hug. "With you and Daddy and Wanda."
"Let Wanda get something to eat first, but I'll come out to the pool with you. How's that?" Nat offered.
"Okay."
Wanda had been eagerly joining the others in the pool every day since Nat had told her it was safe to do so with the healing burns on her neck, and today was no different. The same bathing suit and rash guard Nat had helped her pick out last year was in the backpack Vision had brought her before, and while she hadn't wanted to bother with it at first, she felt better now. "I'll come outside with you while I eat my breakfast, Lila. It will just take me a bit."
"Okay. I wait," Lila said agreeably, giving Wanda a hug too.
Like she had promised, Wanda brought her breakfast out to the pool and sat on the edge while she ate. This was so, so much easier than the first time she had come outside and she couldn't stay very long without being in awful pain or feeling too exhausted to sit up on her own for an extended period of time. "Nat, did you ever find what happened to those...those poor children in that picture from Lagos?" she asked quietly.
Natasha hesitated for a split second, because she had found out, and was half hoping Wanda had forgotten her question. "They're safe staying with their aunt and uncle, they're not on the street, Wanda," she said truthfully.
Wanda's stomach twisted, easily sensing Nat was leaving something out. I killed someone close to them. I just know it. “The tarp. I...I killed their parent, didn't I?" Suddenly the half-eaten breakfast did not look so good, and she pushed it aside and scrambled away from the pool as quickly as she could. In seconds the breakfast lay in the grass, and Wanda felt Natasha gently rubbing her back as she held her hair away from her face. What have I done?
"Wanda, you didn't give me a chance to finish," Natasha said firmly, once she was sure Wanda had finished emptying her upset stomach. "One. There was no one under that tarp. It was covering pieces of rubble to keep people away from it, and a reporter took that photo from that angle because it looked lurid, a couple of mildly injured kids crying next to what was presumably a body. Two, their single mother was seriously injured in the blast and is at a hospital. That is why those kids are with relatives." Natasha did not like Wanda's current countenance; little bits of scarlet floated around both hands, heedless that it was probably hurting her injured arm, and then all of it dissipated abruptly as the younger girl dropped to her knees. She shook her head lightly at a worried Clint, figuring two people trying to help Wanda simultaneously probably wasn't a good idea. He nodded and stayed put, immediately understanding what Nat meant.
"Is their mother going to be okay?" Wanda whispered. She dug her nails into her leg hard until Nat tugged her hand away, leaving little half-moon marks on her skin. How could I have not asked sooner? I wasn't even thinking about those poor people yesterday at all. Wanda knew Natasha would tell her not to punish herself over it, that she was allowed to shove guilt away and enjoy herself for awhile, but it still made her thoughts go back to wondering if she deserved to be here at all.
"Yes. It will just take awhile." Natasha didn't know that much about it, but from the information she'd been able to track down, that was also the truth. "Please don't beat yourself up further over this. For what it's worth, I was able to receive a message directly from those children's aunt. She called the whole incident an unfortunate accident and mentioned you specifically."
"...What?" Wanda sounded a bit croaky hearing that, and she shifted, pulling her knees to her chest cautiously. Why would she mention me? The slight twinkle in Natasha's eyes despite the serious expression made her certain whatever it was wasn't a bad thing.
"She said she blamed you and Captain America at first, but changed her mind. Those children saw you specifically after the explosion before we all got out of there. The woman didn't say specifically what the kids said, just that they knew you got the 'bad guy' away from the people on the ground and that you didn't let it explode on purpose. She's been on social media defending us." Natasha was glad this seemed to make Wanda relax somewhat. While she had been torn whether to volunteer all the information to Wanda, it seemed simply waiting for her to ask had been the right decision. Now Wanda knew and she had gotten very upset, but she also knew some ordinary stranger directly affected by the Lagos incident was defending her along with the other rogues. She'd asked for the information when she thought she was ready, after all.
"Thank you, Nat. I...don't know if I feel better or worse. Just different, I guess." Wanda pulled a fistful of grass and let the blades go one by one. "I'm glad the children are not alone. Don't want more...like...Pietro and me." I keep thinking about us even while being upset about others. Is that selfish?
Lila trotted over dripping wet. "Come swimming with us," she ordered hopefully. "Wanda, are you okay? You puked."
"I'm okay," Wanda assured her, letting Lila pull her back over to the pool. Unlike Lila, she didn't cannonball in, but she did slip into the water and just dunk herself under entirely. Underwater was calming and while the cool water stung her neck briefly at first, it was soothing afterwards. When she popped her head back up and blinked the water out of her eyes, a very hopeful Lila was offering her a pool noodle.
"Daddy said I should share," Lila said nonchalantly, "because you like swimming but aren't very good."
Wanda lifted a ball of water twice the size of Clint's head with her magic and dropped it on him, being careful not to get it on Laura or baby Nate, who were sitting next to him.
"What was that for?!" Clint protested, but he was smiling and glad to see Wanda do something silly like that after the previous incident a bit ago. She did not look quite so distressed now, and he would always take seeing her use her powers for silly mischief to be a good thing.
"Saying I can't swim."
"Said you still weren't very good at it, not that you couldn't."
"I know." Wanda did agree with him, and nodded when Nat offered to help her with her injured arm again. She knew the water would be helpful and also that they had no way to check if it was healing well or not.
"Lila, Coop, let Wanda be until we're finished. She'll play with you in a bit." Natasha was unendingly gentle unfastening the splint from around Wanda's arm, keeping her own hands near the elbow and wrist to support it. "You still okay?" Nat asked quietly.
"...I think so," Wanda answered immediately, her voice more nervous than anything. Having nothing there frightened her, as much as she didn't want anything restricting her arm, because then she was scared moving it would hurt like before. Wanda squeezed her good hand around Lila's pool toy. Calm down. Nat isn't going to hurt me. We did this a few times already and it hurt but it also felt better after.
"Wanda, you tell me the second it starts hurting any worse, please. Mild pain is fine, but it shouldn't be killing you, either." Nat was honestly more concerned than she was letting on; with no way to get Wanda's arm tended to by a professional, they were stuck using previous experience to help her. At least the visible swelling and bruising were gone by now, and Wanda could open and close her fist easily without pain (or so she claimed). Those were good signs.
"Okay."
"I mean it. I don't want us to make it worse trying to move it. You need to tell me. We don't have anything else to go by."
"Fussy," Wanda said, but she wasn't annoyed. "You never take care of yourself like this."
Natasha smiled and shook her head. "Do as I say, not as I do. Besides, there's a difference between pushing it when we have easy access to professional medical help at the Compound or a hospital and when we don't, and we aren't stuck in the field where we absolutely have to."
Wanda stayed quiet for a minute or two, letting her friend move the damaged joint a little. "That hurt," she admitted quickly. "Not...awfully. You could move it past that if-"
"No, we stick with just moving it that much then," Natasha interrupted quickly, staying within the range Wanda identified. "Thank you for being honest. This is already more movement than before. Maybe Melina will have access to an x-ray machine. I'd feel better if we could do that, just to make sure."
"I'm okay, Nat, really. I don't remember if I ever said this right...after, but..." Wanda trailed off, tasting both her own salty tears and the chlorinated pool water. Stop it. There is no reason to cry here. “Thank you for taking care of me. I don't...don't remember much from being on the quinjet right after the rescue. But you made what I do remember not so...unpleasant. I think you...helped me eat chocolate pudding. It was good. Especially after..." she trailed off. "I don't know. You didn't have to treat me like that. You could have continued keeping me sedated so I wouldn't be a problem. You could have left me, and you didn't."
"You didn't really believe we would come for the team and leave you behind, did you?"
"I didn't, but..." Wanda squeezed her eyes shut, trying to find the right words. "It...got hard to trust anyone would come for us. Like I was just wishing into a hopeless void so I wouldn't fall apart entirely. But that doesn't matter, it still means the world to me n-not to be...left all alone...again. So I want to say thank you." She hesitantly met Nat's gaze, but her friend just looked understanding as always.
"You don't owe me any thanks, but you are a hundred percent welcome. I can't promise nothing else bad will happen to you, but I can promise you don't have to worry about being abandoned."
"I am scared of losing you too like I lost Pietro."
Natasha quickly fastened the splint back around the injured arm before hugging Wanda close. "I promise I will do everything in my power to prevent that," she whispered in Wanda's ear.
Pietro promised he wouldn't leave me too. He is still gone. Wanda didn't answer, just clutched her friend as tightly as she could.
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A frantic knock on their bedroom door in the morning made both Wanda and Nat jump. Natasha answered the door to see Laura looking rather freaked out. "I don't know if this is a problem, but I thought you needed to know immediately. Looks like that prison clip with Sam trying to get Wanda help has been leaked. It's all over the news sites this morning."
Nat was unsurprised. "I figured that might happen. Sam knew too. That's why we used that one and not any with Wanda visible in them."
As if on cue, Wanda's phone rang, and she picked it up since it was just Vision's familiar number. "Good morning, Vis. We saw the leak already," she said quickly.
"No, no- Wanda, listen carefully. You need to leave the country quickly before US airport search protocols are initiated. That leak is presumably a good thing for you, because it has sent the secretary into a...a bit of a rampage. You are not in danger right now, but I do not wish you to end up stuck here. Get out quickly. I need to go. Please, just be careful. I'll text you flight information in a moment. Mr. Stark booked you in JFK already since none of us could produce a physical credit card safe for you to use yet."
Wanda felt more disturbed by Vision sounding so worried and then hanging up than this new information that she and Nat needed to get out today. She closed her eyes and hugged herself briefly before relaying the information to Natasha and Laura.
"Okay, new game plan then," Nat said calmly. "Wanda, pack your things. Put on something easy to move in, something plain. JFK is about four hours from here. Tony wouldn't have been dumb enough to book something so early that we couldn't get to the airport in time."
"But Nat, how would he know what name to put the tickets under? Don't you have to have an ID?" Wanda followed her friend's instructions reluctantly, opting to leave her plain black t-shirt on and pulling out one of the two skirts Vision had brought back from the Compound for her before, along with a hoodie. This seemed boring but acceptable; she found it easier to move in a skirt than jeans, and she did not want to go out in public in just her lounge clothes now that she felt better.
Natasha glanced at what Wanda was pulling out and raised an eyebrow. "Something with pockets," she added pointedly. "Taser. Pepper spray. Pocket."
"This skirt has pockets. I even sewed zippers into the pockets." Wanda looked rather pleased with herself, and then stifled a giggle when Nat smiled and laughed herself. She still thought her chosen outfit was boring, but as her friend had pointed out, that was kind of the point.
Since they really didn't have that much with them, it didn't take long to 'pack'. Laura had brought Wanda one of her own rolling suitcases and told her to use that instead of the duffel since it both had more space and would be easier for her to maneuver. Everything easily fit, and Natasha was glad the two of them wouldn't need to deal with baggage claim. Their small suitcases counted as carry-ons, and Wanda's backpack could be her 'purse'. Nat had a large navy purse herself that she was not a particular fan of, but it would lend itself well to the 'just two friends on a trip' vibe. Wanda still stuck out a bit simply because of her injured arm, but at least the hoodie disguised that somewhat on first glance. Natasha rather thought she still just gave off Wanda vibes, but she suspected that was mostly just because she knew Wanda.
"Vision says the tickets are to France and we're under...Ellie Moore and Charlotte Johnson. Nat, why is Tony getting to pick what aliases we're using?" Wanda asked grumpily, not particularly pleased about this at all. "There's a third under John Robinson, but it looks like it's in a different row."
"Because he couldn't call us right now and clearly he knew we'd want to use one of the US ones. He doesn't know all of the fake papers we have anyway, just a few. Those are a safe option, Ellie." Natasha glanced at Wanda's phone quickly. "Okay, so we'll meet up with the others briefly there, but we should split up. I guess we'll find out for sure later, but I assume Tony either realized our plan to have Clint fly both him and Scott home in the quinjet eventually since that's simplest for everyone, or he's trying to cover himself so that Clint isn't already here in the States."
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Lila hugged both Wanda and Natasha tightly before they left the house, presumably for the final time. "I don't want you to go," she said sadly. "I like us all here."
Nat knelt in front of the little girl and took her by the hands. "Your daddy will be coming back soon. I can promise that," she told Lila. "Wanda and I won't be safe here anymore if we stay."
"I know. Not fair." Lila looked up at Wanda as she squeezed Auntie Nat tightly again. "Wanda, I wanted to go swimming with you again."
Wanda smiled at that. "I don't know when I'll be able to see you again, but...thank you." Like Natasha, she knelt to eye level with Lila, who immediately hugged her too. Thank you for treating me the same as always, she thought but didn't say, knowing it would probably confuse Lila or make her believe she wasn't okay.
Cooper, less inclined to hug than his sister, still let Wanda hug him regardless. "I will keep all the secrets," he said stoically, and then, "I hope you're able to come back soon. I mean. I think it won't happen, but I still hope." He grinned.
Laura whispered that she would always have a place on the farm to stay if the Accords were ever amended enough that she could do so, which made Wanda's eyes feel hot. "I mean it, Wanda. You and Nat both. I will never turn you two away."
Why? Why do you still want me? Wanda could not say anything at first, but she melted into Laura's hug all the same, little baby Nate squished between them. Much like Nat, Laura felt like a pillar of strength to her. "My mother would have liked you," she blurted finally. "I wish you could have met her. And Pietro. Thank you for having me. You made me feel like-" she paused, again searching for words, "Like I had a home again, same as you did for me last year. This house is not our home, but you made it feel homey."
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The three Avengers were quiet for awhile once getting out on the road. Wanda could not drive with her arm still injured- or rather, she could, but she would have to use her magic to help- so Nat and Clint would split the four hour drive. "Should it come up in any way before we split off at the airport so that it doesn't look like we're together in the first place, you're our niece," Nat told her firmly. "It's not the best explanation, but it will have to do. And talk as little as possible without appearing suspicious."
"I will." Wanda knew what Natasha meant by that, because her disguised accent was decent but not perfect, and the more she spoke, the more likely it would be that someone would notice. She knew her friends had put her in the front passenger seat so she wouldn't have to sit alone regardless, while whoever wasn't driving could take up the whole backseat if they wanted to. Like every other time she had been in a car, she did not like it, but she was okay for now. Right now she was more focused on the idea of squeaking through airport security.
Wanda hated airports with a passion. Once on the plane, that was one thing. An overstimulating, crowded airport was another.
"How are we supposed to get our gear through security?" she asked finally.
"Same way as every other time. Let me take care of it, Wanda. At absolute worst, you can easily convince someone they saw nothing." Nat reached up front and patted Wanda's shoulder.
Clint gave both of his teammates a frustrated look. "Nat, you told me leave my bow and arrows with Laura."
"That's because you're most likely going straight back home and she can hide them for you. Besides, it's easier to get a gun onto a plane than your bow, sorry." Natasha did not sound very sorry at all. She was far more concerned with maneuvering international airports with Wanda, who had disliked the chaotic noise of airports even before and would most certainly hate it all the more now. Before, it normally did not matter if Wanda ended up making her eyes glow red or some startled wisp of scarlet made an appearance. Now, that would mean instant recognition and they'd have to fight their way out. Whatever happened, she was determined not to let her younger teammate be taken again. Wanda's quiet but adamant I will kill myself before letting Ross have me again she had confided to Natasha before they had left the vacation house disturbed her to the core, though she also thoroughly understood why Wanda had said it in the first place.
Nat privately decided she would eliminate that man herself if it came to that and Wanda wouldn't or couldn't defend herself enough to remove herself from the situation.
Wanda tried her best to just relax and not think about the airport, or the plane, where she would at least have Nat with her but there would still be an enclosed space with seatbelts and too many other people. Thinking about it wasn't going to help. I don't want to have one of those awful panic attacks in public. I can't. If I lose control again...?"I don't want people touching me. I hate strangers touching me."
Clint glanced at Nat in the rearview mirror. "You still think this is going to work?" he muttered.
"Be quiet," Natasha said sharply. "Give her some credit, will you? She doesn't want strangers touching her, big deal. That was the same before."
Wanda turned enough in her seat so she could see Nat, her good hand holding onto the distasteful seatbelt tightly. "Nat, you know he's right. I will look suspicious simply because I am anxious, even if I don't mess up."
"You will not. Lots of people have a flight phobia. That would be most people's first thought, not that you're a fugitive Avenger. Get yourself through security. I'll deal with our things if there ends up being an issue, but there won't be."
Wanda looked dubious at this. "I don't think I am supposed to carry a taser or pepper spray in my pockets, either. I can't very well whisper we're on a mission like we did last time."
"Wanda, can't you simply...make the scanners read clear?" Clint asked suddenly. "I know you don't want to mind-control some random person just doing their job, but you could do that for all three of us and that harms no one. Your enhancements made the scanners go wonky last time we were on a public flight. Nat showed you how to fool the machines, but why bother with that if we don't have to?"
I think so? I'm not sure. Wanda looked down at her hands and mulled this over. "I've never done something like that before. I don't know if my eyes would glow or not," she said slowly. "And if we enter the airport separately like we planned, I still can't help you, just me and Nat."
"Never mind me, at absolute worst, if I get caught, I go home and Scott's on his own. Get you and Nat through safely."
Wanda considered this; she was still terrified her splinted arm would automatically pull her for a second check, which admittedly was probably a legitimate worry. If she could successfully pull off Clint's plan, that would be very helpful. Can I do this? I don't know if it would help or just make things worse. “I think my magic is capable, I just...don't trust myself. But I will try if you think I should."
Notes:
Airports suck, I agree with Wanda lol.
Okay, so I realize you are obviously not supposed to smuggle weapons, $150k in cash, or fake papers onto planes in real life, but hey...our heroes are currently fugitives, sooo...yeah. meh. I can just imagine what my search history looks like currently as I work on getting the trio to Europe successfully LOL
Any feedback is much appreciated!<3
Chapter 19: Chapter 19
Summary:
In which Wanda, Clint, and Nat make the trip to Paris. A few complications ensue, but they manage to reunite with the rest of their rogue team.
Notes:
I thought Nat and Wanda would make it to meet Yelena safely this chapter, but that will happen next chapter!:)
I hope you enjoy!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
After about an hour and a half on the road, the trio pulled into a rest stop so Clint and Nat could trade places driving. Wanda slipped out of the SUV so she could stretch her legs and be out of the car briefly, but she didn't bother making the trip to the bathroom inside, wanting to avoid any possible interactions with other people as long as she could.
"You okay?" Clint asked quietly.
"Just...worried. I'm fine." Wanda reluctantly climbed back in their SUV and accepted the pillow Nat offered her. "I'm too antsy to sleep," she muttered.
Natasha shook her head and gently put the pillow under Wanda's bad arm, ignoring her protests that she was fine. "I'm sure riding in a car for hours can't feel good on that, Wanda, even if it doesn't feel so awful anymore. You can't drive right now anyway, so you may as well be as comfortable as possible."
Wanda didn't argue this; the pillow admittedly did help, because then she didn't have to be paying attention and making sure she didn't bump it against anything, and she could just relax...mostly.
The seemingly endless road trip dragged on peacefully until it began pouring rain. "Better check on our flight," Clint suggested. "Make sure planes aren't grounded because of this."
A picture appeared in Wanda's texts from Vision, of a man she thought she recognized back from the Raft but wasn't entirely sure, along with simply the words 'avoid at the airport'. Wanda's hand shook as she showed the photo to Clint. "Was this man on...on the Raft?" she whispered. "I think he was, but I can't remember."
Clint took one glance at the picture and scowled. The man was one of the ones that had often been tasked with throwing an unconscious, or close to it, Wanda back into the cell after those interrogation sessions; that was probably why she didn't remember him. This one hadn't seemed to be sadistic and enjoy it like Damian had, and when not tasked with that particular job, he simply walked around on his rounds and ignored the rogue Avengers entirely, Wanda included.
Clint still hated him along with the rest of them for throwing a (theoretically) defenseless Wanda around.
"Yes, this asshole wasn't the worst of them, but...yeah. Wanda, where did you get that picture?" Clint asked quietly.
"Vis. He said we should avoid him at the airport." Wanda tensed as three more photos came through. "And these. He must be risking too much sending this. I don't know what all of these...acronyms are. Airports, I know, but I do not recognize all of these."
Clint frowned, studying the three new pictures and the list of seemingly just letters. "They're US international airports with x's next to a couple. I'm guessing he means don't risk LAX or Denver. Surprised ours isn't marked."
"Ross probably thinks we wouldn't risk New York," Nat pointed out, keeping her eyes on the road. "Clint, help Wanda find an alert sound on her phone that doesn't bother her. I don't want to risk missing any new messages."
"You got a quacking sound option on here. You like ducks, how about that?" Clint suggested.
Wanda's expression drooped a bit, and she suddenly wished she still had the small duck plushie she'd had in her childhood apartment, or the The Ugly Duckling book she'd managed to scavenge from the wreckage but then lost when she and Pietro volunteered for stupid Hydra...or the English copy of the same book Nat had bought for her last year when they had gone to the bookstore. Natasha had realized her English reading skills were nowhere nearly as good as her speaking skills, and never made Wanda feel stupid for it as she- and Vision- patiently helped her improve, starting with that children's book and then quickly moving on to chapter books, though Wanda still liked returning to that picture book all the same. "Quacking noise is fine," she agreed.
The trip continued on, all three of them growing more and more tense as they came closer to the airport. Nat and Clint traded driving again, and Wanda tried her best to take a nap, though she couldn't do more than doze off fitfully and jerk awake minutes later repeatedly. Rain poured down incessantly, and while there were no updates saying anything about planes being grounded, Natasha was growing very concerned. Staying in the airport longer if flights were delayed would increase the risk of being recognized and detained, and even if they weren't, she knew Wanda would not do well with being potentially stuck there for hours.
By the time the trio pulled into a parking place, the rain had at least slacked off mostly. Wanda already felt herself shaking, and she shook her head hard in an effort to calm down. I can do this. I have to.
"I'll go in first," Clint offered, knowing quite well the less time Wanda was in the airport terminals, the better. "See you two in a bit, though I won't acknowledge you when I see you inside, obviously."
This made Wanda smile a little. "I know. I'm safe with Nat. Don't worry." I am not safe, but I'm safer than I would be alone.
Clint gave both of them a hug before leaving quickly as businessman John Robinson. Wanda watched him until he was out of sight before turning back to Natasha. "What do you want me to do if we get separated somehow?" she asked shakily.
"Get off to the side somewhere and call me. I will come find you, I promise. Do not go in any bathrooms alone. Wanda, I can't promise this is going to go smoothly, but you are not defenseless, even without accessing your magic. You know that."
"I can't really run yet."
"Exactly. Nobody is going to feel threatened by Ellie. Use that. We don't look like threats, so most people will not think anything of us at all." Nat let them sit in silence for a few minutes more before sighing and getting out. "You can do this. Come on."
Wanda slowly slid out and grabbed her backpack, nearly dropped it, and then squeezed her eyes closed while Natasha helped her get her bad arm through the strap and settle it on her back. I have Nat with me. This will be fine. It has to be. Now she wondered if she was strong enough to wrangle a backpack and suitcase in that airport at all without using her magic to help.
"Is that backpack hurting your ribs?" Nat asked quietly.
"Not really. They are still sore, but I don't think it's because I am carrying my bag," Wanda said, which felt honest to her. "I just feel...shaky."
"Like you aren't strong enough to lug bags through the airport or because you're anxious?"
"Both."
"Okay." Natasha considered this for a moment before simply taking their other items out herself. "You need to tell me if it gets to be too much. You absolutely cannot push yourself to the point of collapse. That will bring far too much attention. Understand?"
"I understand." Wanda knew if they were somewhere else, Nat would not let her carry anything heavy in the first place at all. She followed Natasha silently, sensing that her friend had pulled herself into her Charlotte alias already. 'Ellie' should do the same. I can reuse the car accident explanation if questioned. Wanda remembered Nat going over the story with her in the SUV on the way here. They were two friends simply taking a trip abroad. Alas, they ended up delaying their trip for a few weeks until Ellie was mostly recovered from a nasty accident, but oh yes, they were very excited to see Paris anyway! Charlotte had relatives there.
Natasha walked slower than she usually would so Wanda could keep up easily. There were no visible signs of Wanda's magic, but Nat could tell the younger girl was already terrified. Presumably the light rain was not helping, and she finally tugged her off to the side. "Is there something we can realistically do to make this easier for you?" she asked, keeping her voice quiet.
Wanda shook her head. There really isn't. I don't want to be here, I'm scared someone is going to recognize us, I'm scared I will mess up, and I hate airports. “I want to go home," she whispered, realizing a second later that she really didn't even know what she meant by that. The Compound was not home anymore. The tiny apartment in Sokovia was long gone. Tony's vacation house was not home, even if it certainly felt like it with Nat, Clint, Laura, and the Barton children in it. The Barton farm was not home either, even if that place also made her feel at home too.
"I know. Believe me, I know."
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They were able to board the AirTrain to the correct terminal with no complications, and Wanda mostly just stayed silent, sticking close to Natasha and keeping her earbuds in as planned. This helped with the noise, but people all shut in a space made her uneasy all the same. Then someone unknowingly bumped into her splinted arm with their bag, which really hurt, and she shrank back against her friend nervously. Nat did not say anything, but she gave Wanda's shoulder a gentle squeeze. I am fine. It's an airport. I survived that horrible prison. I can do this. Wanda closed her eyes and took a few slow breaths, knowing quite well that part of the reason she was scared was because she didn't want to be dragged off to that hellhole a second time. What if someone tranquilized her and Nat couldn't get her out? Or used her friend to threaten her into cooperating into being restrained again?
No. If that happened, I will mind-control someone in a second. I won't go back there and I won't let Nat be hurt either. Wanda knew Natasha certainly didn't need her help, but she was not going to surrender again like she had back in Leipzig. She would fight back as much as she could, and if she wasn't strong enough, she would take herself out of play entirely. Whatever happened, she would not go back to the Raft no matter what.
After the stranger had bumped into Wanda, Nat moved so that she was blocking anyone from running into Wanda's arm again. Wanda didn't make any noise at all, but Natasha could tell it had frightened her because it hurt. That, at least, was something she could prevent from happening again. The normal airport goings-on were, admittedly, stressful even under ideal circumstances; it didn't bother her, but she understood why Wanda hated it so much.
Wanda tried to concentrate on her favorite playlist she was currently playing, but she scanned the terminal full of strangers warily all the same. "Charlotte," she said abruptly, pausing and yanking out one earbud. "I see one. There." One of the men Vision had sent a photo of and said to watch out for was mere yards away.
"Okay, keep moving. Quickly now. We're fine," Nat told her, grabbing Wanda's suitcase along with her own. "Follow me and don't stare over there." If there was one, there were probably more, and Natasha did not want to deal with a confrontation if they didn't have to.
Someone's phone beeped a minute later, and Wanda immediately tensed and reached for her neck on instinct. I need to calm down. I may not be safe, but I'm not there anymore. This is fine. She squeezed her eyes shut briefly, and when she looked up, Nat was no longer right in front of her, seemingly vanished into the sea of people.
Now what do I do? Nat had said to get off to the side somewhere and call her if they ended up separated, but if she did that, then she couldn't just stay hidden and lost in the crowd either. I don't know what to do! Pietro. What would he do here? That isn't helpful. Pietro wouldn't be scared, he would just keep going and find his friend at the gate and stupid security and wait there I know where I'm supposed to go but- Wanda felt herself starting to freak out; her eyes burned and her heart was racing, her legs shaking under her. She needed to do something; standing in the middle of the terminal panicking helped no one and made her stick out like a sore thumb.
"Are you okay?" A concerned-looking woman with a sleeping toddler in a stroller and her husband stopped, and Wanda realized she had done the last thing she wanted to do, attracting the attention of some random strangers.
"I lost my friend- I hate airports," she heard herself say. Don't say more. I just messed up. I talked in my normal voice. Please, please don't let this ruin everything. She held the sore arm awkwardly; someone else had bumped into her again, and now it really, really hurt.
The woman was nonplussed, and pulled a very anxious Wanda over to a bench. "I'm Xenia. This is Daniel. You can borrow my phone if you need to. Would you like me to wait with you or help you find your friend, maybe?"
Wanda blinked. The name and the woman's accent, much like her own, made her realize this woman was Sokovian too, just like her. Then she cringed, knowing Xenia probably recognized her accent too. If she tried to make her voice sound different now, that looked more suspicious than if she just spoke normally. There were plenty of other Sokovian refugees in the United States, after all, like running into someone like Xenia proved. "I'm sorry. You don't have to...do any of that."
Xenia gave her a curious look but didn't press, not inclined to leave a distressed girl alone in a busy airport. Then Daniel studied her closer, and Wanda immediately knew what he was going to say next.
"You're the Sokovian Avenger, aren't you? God, you're barely more than a kid. I thought you were older."
No no no please no. Wanda stumbled to her feet to bolt as fast as she could. "I-"
"Please wait. We're not going to say anything," Daniel said quickly. "We've seen that security footage clip from that prison. I'd say many, many people would not turn you in after that."
Wanda felt his gaze fall on her injured arm and wished she could sink through the floor. There was zero malice from either of these people. She could sense that much; she felt their emotions without even trying. They wanted to help, and in Xenia's case, Wanda also felt disgusted anger wafting from her along with her initial concern. I don't know what to say. What would Nat want me to do? The idea that there were random civilians right here that had offered help and then continued offering help after identifying her was baffling.
"What do you need? I can't imagine an international fugitive would come to an airport without very good reason." Xenia sounded calm despite the threads of anger and disgust underneath, and she moved to block Wanda more from the main walkway.
Wanda stared at her, feeling as if she knew Xenia from somewhere else. Somewhere long, long time ago. Sokovia. She was probably a little older than me now back then. I think she helped Pietro and me hide in a store for the night during a snowstorm several times when we had nowhere to go. She did not think Xenia realized she was the same little girl she'd helped back then; Xenia had probably helped many people and wouldn't remember her specifically. "I don't want to...make you late for your flight," Wanda said finally. I need to call Nat. She would come back for me. She's probably looking for me now.
"That's why we always come early. Need to get you to yours," Daniel pointed out. "Look. There's probably people here looking for you. I don't want you or your team being sent back to that max security prison. Would it help if-"
"There you are, Ellie," Nat interrupted. Wanda thought Natasha looked uncharacteristically freaked out, so she quickly said she was fine. Nat yanked her to her feet and wrapped her in a hug. "My god, when you didn't call right away..."
Xenia's expression brightened even though she was clearly still concerned. "You really had lost your friend. You want us to do anything else?"
Wanda swiped at her eyes, relieved to see Nat and overwhelmed at the idea that this normal couple still wanted to help. "No, but I can't tell you how much what you just did means to me," she said softly.
"No problem. Good luck. Wait a minute." Xenia said, because Daniel was scribbling two phone numbers on a clean napkin fished from their stroller. "If you ever do need a witness or just some ordinary people to say something on your behalf, give us a call."
__________________
Natasha wanted to chew Wanda out for not immediately contacting her, but she knew quite well that Wanda must have panicked and then that family had noticed her distress and tried to help. She could not bring herself to be upset with Wanda for that. Thankfully Wanda had run into people sympathetic to their current situation that realized who she was, and not someone that would have harmed her and turned her in. "I'm not losing you again. Hand. Suitcase handle," Natasha ordered. "You don't have to waste energy pulling it, but I need to know where you are. Focus on my voice. It'll be quieter once we board the plane, and once we're past security and waiting to board, you can sit." And I'll keep an eye on you every second, she didn't add.
Wanda nodded willingly. She did not like being treated like a child that needed to be kept track of, but logically she knew Nat was right. I can't handle this on my own right now, and that's fine. Wanda concentrated on Nat's steady stream of words as Charlotte spoke excitedly about her Paris trip with Ellie. With one earbud in and Natasha talking to her, she felt minutely better.
Things continued going smoothly until they approached security. Natasha was cool as a cucumber, setting their items on the x-ray scanner and making sure the suitcases were arranged vertically so that the few weapons would merely show up as lines on the image. Then she helped Wanda get her boots and hoodie off. Wanda was quite sure nobody would make her take a light hoodie off, but she also understood that this way if she did fail to make the scanner read clear and set it off, most people would merely assume it must be the thing protecting her injured arm.
"You go first. I'll be right behind you, I promise," Nat said reassuringly.
Wanda thought all of the TSA people looked very tired. She shifted her weight from one shaky foot to the other nervously until Natasha rested a comforting hand on her back. There were three people in front of them, and Wanda remembered what Clint had suggested before. Unfortunately, she wasn't sure how her enhancements had loused up the scanners previously, but she looked down at the floor in case her eyes glowed red and concentrated hard.
"Go back through again please," the stern-looking lady manning the scanner said tiredly to the man that had just gone through. "It glitches sometimes."
That much worked. Clear now. Clear.
Next two people, she did nothing. The scanner read clear. A woman's lotion bottle was confiscated from a purse for being too big. Wanda felt herself growing more and more tense. I need to relax. Me looking panicked is not helpful. Ellie should be excited.
"Next."
Wanda repeated what she'd done with the man, hoping very hard that it would react the same way. Nat showed me how to get a small item through. I can do this even if I fail to make it glitch. Shield object in your fist. Make sure the least surface area of the object as possible is facing the detector walls and get it through faster than the rest of me. She waited a moment until the operator glanced away for a second and slipped through appearing nonchalant other than the brief silly-looking motion she'd made with her closed fist. Am I safe? Wanda moved to get her things from the conveyor belt and let herself hope for a second that she'd been successful.
"Wait. You aren't finished." The lady's expression seemed slightly softer than a moment before, and Wanda wondered if this was a good thing or not. She could not sense any malice from the woman, but that would change if she noticed anything amiss about Wanda beyond an injured arm. "Do you have any other medical devices on you?"
Wanda shook her head no, which was technically true. I don't want to be touched. Please don't touch me. She could mind-control this woman to let her go, but she didn't want to do such a thing to someone just doing her job. Then she remembered Nat telling her, you can always request to be wanded instead of someone giving you a pat-down if you get pulled. That would be bad for me, but it would be better for you.
The lady was still talking when Wanda blurted, "Can you do it with the wand instead if I have to be double-checked?" Ellie voice. Do your best, Wanda. She doesn't know who you are, she just sees a random anxious girl with an injured arm.
"Of course."
Clear. Clear. Clear, Wanda's mind screamed. Then she realized it should probably react on her splinted arm and briefly panicked, but the woman just visually studied the splint briefly before waving her on. Wanda nearly cried in relief when she saw Natasha walking over to her with all their things. We actually made it through. Success.
Wanda wondered very much how on earth Nat had gotten through with who knew what carried on her person, and decided she would ask later.
"I can carry my things," she pointed out, but Nat only helped her put her backpack back on and told her to hold the rolling suitcase handle again. Wanda did not feel like protesting, not when she wanted to get out of that airport so badly. They quickly made their way to the boarding area and sat down to wait. Wanda put her earbuds in again and stayed close to her friend. She saw Clint reading a newspaper, which seemed funny, and was very relieved he had successfully made it to this point too.
Natasha kept an eye on Wanda, glad that she hadn't drawn any more attention to them than that incident where they'd been separated briefly. She seemed to be somewhat okay now, but Nat wouldn't be at ease until she had her friend somewhere safe and quiet to mentally recharge. She too had spied Clint, and could tell he had relaxed upon seeing them, even though he hadn't acknowledged them whatsoever, of course. Natasha put one arm around Wanda, knowing contact with someone she trusted normally helped her stay calm, and was rewarded with a grateful look.
Wanda did not feel okay with their current situation, but she did feel better now that the worst part was over. The 'Songs that calm me down' playlist she was currently trying to focus on also helped (currently Call Out My Name by Amaranthe), and she remembered Vision questioning existence of this playlist- "Why are these sounds calming to you?"- which made her smile now.
Minutes crawled by, and there was no sign of any of the men Vision had texted photos of. What did come through was a simple, 'I hope you are doing well. I will come find you as soon as I can. You are very much missed already.' Wanda showed the screen to Natasha, because that message was very kind and made her heart feel all warm and fuzzy.
_________________
Boarding the plane itself was not a problem; no one questioned their passes or IDs at all. Wanda settled herself in her seat, exceedingly pleased she had a window seat, which meant she just had Natasha sitting next to her. She saw Clint safely sitting a few rows further up and relaxed a bit further. Though she still felt antsy, the cramped confines in the plane were a hundred times better than the overwhelming sensory input inside the airport. I will have to deal with it all again once we land, but...
"Is your arm feeling okay?" Nat asked, eyeing Wanda closely.
Wanda immediately understood what Natasha was really asking about- her anxiety over the whole trip, not her sore arm- and she nodded. "Not good, but better," she said truthfully. This she could handle. She had made it through security once, which was much harder than this, and if she had done it once, then she could do it again.
"All right. If you need anything, anything at all, let me know."
Off this plane and somewhere safe and quiet, Wanda thought, but she smiled shakily and nodded. "I will."
By the time they had taken off and been in the air for awhile, Wanda had grown more irritated than anxious. Some pesky child behind them kept kicking the seats, and Wanda thought to herself that Lila and Cooper would never, ever do that. And her legs were cramped, which seemed like such a petty thing to be annoyed by when this was pure luxury compared to being trapped in the Raft. Natasha had requested pillows, and Wanda rested her achy arm on hers. "That really helps. Thank you," she informed her friend.
"Good. Try to sleep. It's going to be a long trip."
Wanda nodded and let herself close her eyes. I'm not safe, but I am not alone. I am fine.
Nothing much happened at all the rest of the flight. Wanda managed to sleep a little in short bursts, but kept startling awake at little noises or the seat-kicking culprit. Nat had to quickly shove her hand down once when tiny scarlet wisps appeared around her fingers. No one appeared to notice since most of the passengers were asleep, but Wanda was so worried it would happen again that she refused to let herself fall asleep again.
Mostly she just sat listening to music and wondering how difficult it would be to meet up with the other half of their rogue team upon landing.
By the time the plane did land, Wanda could tell Natasha was tired, even though she pretended not to be. She probably stayed awake the entire time guarding us. That's my fault. If I wasn't such a mess, I could have done that for us. Wanda decided she would try to do something for her as soon as she could.
They disembarked slowly without incident, and Natasha guided them through the Paris airport confidently, if slower than in the New York one. Wanda knew this was because her friend was not as familiar with this one...and because they were both tired. "Second we're settled, a nap is in order for both of us," Nat declared matter-of-factly. At one point they stopped to fish Wanda's folded crutch from the suitcase, because she knew she could not go much farther without issue.
A taxi took them to some fancy-sounding address Natasha gave, and Wanda decided she was too exhausted to care that she could not understand French much at all. Nat spoke fluent French to the driver, and Wanda was not sure if they were going with 'Charlotte has relatives here and she speaks fluent French' or if Nat planned to switch identities again, so Wanda decided to stay silent, because that was safe. The address turned out to just be a café, and Wanda thought she would love the Paris sights much more if she wasn't so exhausted and therefore worried she would mess up. "Why here?" Wanda asked.
"Just a little further. We'll walk the rest of the way."
Wanda understood that this meant they were walking to Nat's safe house here in the city, and she nodded. "I can do this," she muttered, half to herself and half to her friend.
"I know you can."
After about half a block, Wanda stumbled and nearly fell. Before Natasha could say anything, Wanda leaned herself against a building. "I'm sorry. I am so tired. I do not feel so panicked now, but I can't go further right now without..." she trailed off. I don't know what to do.
Natasha knew Wanda meant she could use her magic to help herself keep going, but obviously they could not have her doing that here. "Okay, Ellie," Nat said calmly. "We're a little over a block away. Give me your backpack. You can do this. We will stop every few steps if we need to."
"...All right."
It took much longer than the block and a half would normally take, as they stopped and started several times, but the two of them finally reached their destination. The second they were inside and locked the door, Natasha dropped all of their bags and put a supportive arm around Wanda instead. Wanda immediately collapsed, her eyes fluttering closed. "Well, we made it at least," Natasha said quietly to no one in particular.
Leaving the bags by the door, Nat just lifted Wanda and headed down the narrow hall to the closest bedroom, mostly ignoring Scott and Sam for the moment. "She's fine," Natasha said firmly.
Wanda mumbled an assent to this and tugged Nat's scarf off her neck. This is as safe as we get right now. I can sleep here. "Yes, fine. Tired. Happy to see you."
Scott looked at Natasha questioningly. Wanda certainly looked okay now other than her neck, which still appeared a hundred times better than before, and her arm, but seeing Black Widow carrying her again disturbed him. "Little red witch girl better be okay," he muttered.
"Scott, I am fine," Wanda assured him. Simply lying down helped her not feel so lightheaded, and while she wasn't going to get up right now, she certainly didn't feel awful anymore, either.
"You said that before too."
"I'm just really tired."
"Scott. She's telling the truth this time. We walked the last couple blocks here, that's all. Between that and the trip, she is exhausted. I could sleep myself honestly. Is Clint here too?" Nat asked.
"Yeah, he's sleeping. Sorry, Wanda, just worried about you. I mean, obviously I saw you on our team video chats, but still. It was in Norway right after we all escaped when I saw you in person last, so...yeah." Scott gave Wanda's shoulder an awkward pat, which made her smile and give him a hug.
"Oh, you have been gifted with a hug from her," Natasha teased.
Wanda thought she should be annoyed, but she really wasn't, because it was true. I'm glad we're here. This is nice. “Is your arm healed yet?" she asked Scott hopefully.
"Sure. Flesh wound. Is yours?"
Satisfied that Wanda was content talking to Scott, Natasha lay down herself on the other side of the bed. "Wanda, we'll leave in a few hours after we've had some rest, okay? Meet Steve at the quinjet and he'll drop us."
"Okay." Wanda knew Nat must be exhausted herself, especially since she was already half asleep. Then she glanced at Scott again. "My arm is much better. I know Nat is still concerned it might not heal right completely. But it's nowhere nearly as bad as it was a few weeks ago."
Scott was satisfied by this. It wasn't like he expected it to be completely healed already, especially with no real doctor to check it for her. And Wanda could talk normally, and she seemed more like the girl he had met back at the airport all those weeks ago. "I've got a scar kind of like yours," he informed her now.
For a second, Wanda thought he somehow knew about the old ones on her back, but then Scott rolled up his t-shirt sleeve and showed her his arm and pointed at her leg. "Oh. I suppose so," Wanda said, stifling laughter.
"Sheesh, what did you think I meant? You got more?"
"Yes. I have been on missions that went wrong and I had plenty before anyway." Wanda did not wish to explain details, but Scott made her feel okay about just casually saying that. He certainly wasn't going to treat her differently just because of that.
"Oh yes. You were a tough little street kid, right? Like Thomas O'Malley."
"Probably more like Toulouse," Wanda replied, realizing that for once, she understood a pop culture reference. That feels...irrationally good. I don't know why, but it does. Laughing about something serious and making a silly connection to a movie she had seen as a child felt delightful.
"Ah, a Disney movie you know. Good, Cassie would be pleased you've seen The Aristocats."
"I wish I could meet Cassie."
"Well, maybe you can on a video call or something."
"I would like that." Wanda could tell Scott was eyeing her neck, but it did not bother her at the moment. "Don't tell me, it still looks awful, I know," she deadpanned.
Scott gave an involuntary start. "...No? I was thinking it looks much better than I figured it would. Besides, if they don't hurt anymore, scars are kind of cool. You can make up dumb stories to rude people and confuse them." He looked extremely pleased with himself now, because Wanda was trying and failing not to laugh.
"I don't know what I should say to that."
"Making you smile is good enough. You don't have to say anything. Go to sleep. I know you and Black Widow have to leave again soon."
_________________
Wanda slept peacefully until Nat's alarm went off some time later. While she still didn't feel completely refreshed, she did feel much, much better. She stretched her legs and sat up, realizing Scott must have left after she’d fallen asleep. Voices down the hall told her Clint and Sam must be awake. "I feel so much better. I'm sorry I made the trip such a...a drag. Thank you for helping me."
"I know the trip here didn't go perfectly, but thank you for listening to instructions. That made it much easier to maneuver us here safely. You don't need to thank me for helping you." Nat sighed and slowly stretched herself, not particularly wanting to get up yet. With the two of them safe for now, it was pleasant to just rest for a bit. A not entirely alert Widow would be a dead Widow. She was responsible for keeping a weakened anxious Wanda safe. She could not keep her safe if she wasn't fully awake and functional.
"I still made mistakes."
"Yes. You did. You also got both of us through security, and you remembered what I told you about the wand. I know you even helped me through, because I 100% should've been pulled for a pat-down, and I wasn't." Nat smiled at her and shook her head. "I've brought weapons through before deep-concealed on sides or between shoulder blades plenty of times on my own, but it is always a risk."
Wanda stared in surprise. I even helped Nat? I'm glad, but... "I didn't even know I helped you," she said quietly.
"Now you do. Now you know you can get us through airport security with no issue at all. And you did it while being on the verge of an anxiety attack most of the time. You did fine. Next time will be easier."
I don't want to do that again, Wanda thought, but Natasha was right. She had done it once. She could do it again. "That woman Xenia...she helped hide Pietro and me indoors during awful winter weather multiple times," she said now, suddenly wanting to share the small connection. "I know she didn't recognize me from that, but I did. I remember. She worked in a department store and hid us in the stock room shelves so we wouldn't freeze outdoors all night. It was cramped and we had to be very quiet, but we had blankets and pillows and she gave us warmer clothes."
Natasha smiled hearing that, even though knowing little Wanda and her twin struggling to survive during winter was horrible. "No wonder she was so willing to help us. She's already broken rules to help others before."
"It was nice seeing someone else from Sokovia with a happy family," Wanda said quietly. It's not the same, but it makes me feel like there's a sliver of hope for me too...maybe. “And that someone that doesn't even know me...cared. She was angry and disgusted on my behalf. Even though she knows what I did in Lagos. Her husband Daniel even commented that he didn't want any of us sent back to that prison. Even...me."
"Because none of you should have been there. Nobody in their right mind wants to send innocent people to a place like that. Why do you think Ross is so displeased that footage clip was leaked?" Nat gave Wanda a serious look. "You have made mistakes. As have I and everyone else. That incident in Lagos was not your fault. You did not deserve to be treated worse than trash in that prison for it."
You have told me over and over. "I...try to believe that, but..." Wanda looked down at her hand, slowly manipulating a scarlet wisp around her fingers. "Nat, you told me those kids' mother was still in the hospital now. She certainly can't possibly be the only one. Maybe me being hurt also is fair."
"Absolutely not. I'm glad you are being honest about your feelings, but that is ridiculous. How can you compare an accident victim safe recovering in a hospital to what happened to you on the Raft?"
Wanda abruptly stood up, her eyes blazing. "Does it matter? That poor woman is still in pain, just like me. Does me failing to protect her by accident make that any better? It doesn't undo it. It doesn't fix anything. It is the exact same."
"That poor woman is not lying in a prison cell being starved, tortured, and emotionally abused. That is not the same at all. She's safe and being cared for."
"And you are caring for me."
Nat stood up herself now, clearly angry. "After you had to wait weeks to get any help. Wanda, think about it. Do you really think anyone deserves what happened in that hellhole, guilty or not?"
"...No. I wouldn't care one bit if people like Ross or Strücker or that Dreykov person you mentioned were in there though," Wanda said thoughtfully, "which I suppose is bad, but it's true." She reached for her phone when it made its new quacking text alert sound, just as Sam stuck his head in the room.
"Guys? I think we might have a problem. Cap just messaged me from the quinjet."
Notes:
Xenia will totally show up in a little Wanda & Pietro one-shot sometime soon:) I like connecting everything and while obviously Xenia doesn’t realize present day older Wanda is one of the little kids she helped years ago, Wanda remembers all the same.
airports are stressful and anxiety-inducing even if you aren’t a fugitive and haven’t been through what Wanda has previously...lol
Any feedback is much appreciated!<3
Chapter 20: Chapter 20
Summary:
In which Clint and Scott are able to head home after a tense confrontation with Ross, Sam and Steve stay at the Paris safe house, and Nat and Wanda meet up with Yelena.
Notes:
YES YES YES I AM SO EXCITED FOR THIS CHAPTER! Cutting Ross down to size a bit and finally reuniting Nat and Yelena lol:)
I am sorry for the late update, but both holiday season stuff combined with Winter Whumperland prompts have been kicking my butt. Anyways, I hope you enjoy!:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda bit her lip and opened her messages, suspecting that alert was connected with Sam's strangely calm comment.
’Wanda, I do not believe you have been identified, but there are individuals looking for you in Paris.'
Then her phone actually rang, and she picked up immediately, putting the call on speaker. "Hi, Vis. You're on speaker just so you know."
"I am not in Paris, but some of the secretary's men are. I do not think this is entirely an...accident," Vision said slowly. "Please be careful."
"Where are you?" Wanda asked.
"We were sent to LAX. They detained people there they believed were the Winter Soldier and you using a child as a cover, but they obviously were not. The young woman was too old to be you and did not look like you at all. The only similarities between you and this young woman were being Sokovian and having pale skin and green eyes." Vision paused, seemingly debating whether to say any more. Then he said simply, "Whenever you leave Paris, do not come back to the United States, Wanda. Please. I miss you and I do not wish you to stay so far away, but this is not safe. Now it is not even safe for other Sokovian people here, either."
Wanda bit her lip hard. Xenia. I didn't know where she and her family were going, but... "Vis, do you know what the people's names were?"
"A Mr. Daniel Murray, wife Xenia. It seems once she knew why they were being detained, she told them if they were dense enough to think an ordinary person was an enhanced Avenger, then at least no one would harm the real Scarlet Shadow."
"I...what? Where did that codename come from?"
"It is spreading with rogue Avengers sympathizers online, Wanda," Vision said, his voice gentle. "It seems that is what you are whether you like it or not. Someone linked that old interview from last year when you first joined the team at one of the sites that leaked that security footage from the Raft."
Wanda glanced at Natasha, who just nodded encouragingly at her. Sam still looked concerned, but Clint and Scott had poked their heads in the room and both looked...proud. Wanda's pale cheeks turned pink. That interview had been mortifying to her. I hated that interview. I sounded weird and I looked anxious the entire time.
"Vision, the windbag is here again. Tell Little Red we need her to hang up and call me. We're getting Ant-Man and Hawkeye home today."
Wanda tensed, thinking that Tony quite frankly sounded stressed. I don't want to talk to Ross. But...I'm here. I'm here safe- more or less- with friends. That man is literally on the other side of the world right now.
"Mr. Stark, that is not fair to her-"
"Do it, Wanda, please. I told you I might be contacting you for help with this, remember? I'm cashing that in now," Tony interrupted quickly. "I'll get your group details as soon as I can whether you're willing to follow through with calling or not, but I can't right now. Gotta go."
The call ended before Wanda could answer, and she looked to Nat for help. "Now what?"
"Sam, what did Steve say to you?" Natasha asked.
"That he had to move the quinjet from where you two planned to meet him because people were about to locate it, that's all. He's in stealth mode in the air now. Now we got the Vision giving us a warning? I don't like it, I don't like it at all."
"She shouldn't have to call that dude just for us," Scott said. "But...if you do, Wanda? You have got all of us here with you. You could just hang up on him if necessary."
Clint sighed, running a hand through his hair. Wanda did not appear particularly distressed, probably because she was no longer alone and felt much better now, but he still didn't want her to have to talk to Ross. "If we do this, we should record the call ourselves."
Natasha nodded and set her own phone up to record, pulling out her own laptop also so they would have quick access to their own proof if necessary. "Of course."
Wanda edged closer to Natasha and began dialing. I am going to do it. I think I have to. “None of you say anything. I don't want him knowing all of us are together, even if he can't track me with my phone," she whispered. "Right, Nat?"
Natasha quickly nodded. "Exactly. One of you boys get us a piece of paper and a pen. You need to say or add something, write or sign it." She put her arm around Wanda's shoulders, knowing that would help.
______________
"I need to talk to that secretary," Wanda said in a strangely flat voice the second Tony picked up.
"You have the Maximoff girl on the phone. What does she want calling you?"
Wanda's hand shook and she quickly set the phone down, leaving it on speaker. I have not heard him directly since...before. There. In that prison. I am safe. I am safe and even if he was here, I can defend myself easily. She chewed her lip and didn't say anything right away. Fear or obnoxious threats would not be good; she needed to just sound neutral and confident. Act. Pretend. It does not have to be real, just convincing. Natasha still had her arm around her shoulders, and Clint had sat down next to her on the other side. Even Scott and Sam also hovered nearby. I have friends here. I am not alone. “It would be...in your best interest to allow and approve Scott Lang returning home, along with Clint Barton, Ross," she said carefully.
"That's Secretary Ross to you. You're in no position to make demands, you little-"
"I think I am, Ross. Would you like more of the...the Raft footage released?" Wanda's fingers clenched into a fist, and then she hugged her bad arm close. Not there, not there. Make him admit what he did to me and the others. "You will let my friends go home, or I...I will release all nineteen days' worth of it. You were torturing me. And y-you made my team watch."
"You're delusional. There is no torture sanctioned on the Raft. Maybe you just can't remember."
Tony snorted. "As I told you before, you claiming torture isn't sanctioned doesn't mean it did not happen. You flapped your mouth saying you didn't know about it, remember? So you admitted it did happen before. You want the girl dropping all that footage, Ross? Really?"
Wanda could feel herself shaking, but Natasha continued holding her tightly. "If I couldn't remember things accurately, it would be because you had me drugged constantly. But I...can remember...enough. You will let my friends go home and-" she cut herself off, eyeing the phone screen Clint was holding up so she could see. "And you will cease, um, unlawfully detaining all these innocent people, especially from my country, with no proof." Now Wanda felt her words flowing more easily, and she continued quickly, ignoring an attempted interruption. "I have more than enough proof of what you did. Stop harassing innocent civilians because you are prejudiced against enhanced people."
"Oh, so you are in LAX somewhere."
"Thank you for admitting what you did to...oh let us see these news interviews and comments. The Murrays. The Petrovićs. Sanela. Marko. Aleksandra. Shall I continue?" Wanda signed thank-you to Clint. Though her eyes were hot with tears, seeing so many angry, defensive comments spurred her on to continue.
'I see her interview last year. Why does no one blame the bad person with bomb instead? That girl and Captain America are not to blame.' ~Sanela
'I have never met that enhanced girl, but why the hell would she ever work for you at all if this is the way you treat people from where she's from? This government is not after a destructive weapon, but excuses to blame a refugee girl. Starvation and abuse in a sanctioned prison? Hypocrites. No better than our puppet government was.' ~Marko
'I hope you never find any runaway Avengers. I was detained- I do not look anything like the Scarlet Shadow. I only have her accent. If she's guilty from an accident, why is she the only hero ruined by it? They all cause damage. I used to hate them. But now I think we need them. All of them.' ~Aleksandra
Wanda's heart lifted the more Clint scrolled. There were certainly also many horrid, rude comments (including ones directed at these random innocent people rather than herself or her team), but she could see why Tony had said Ross was 'on a rampage'. He needed to shut this down soon, because it was already a circus online.
"You have to be restrained differently. You broke the law. You're a weapon of mass destruction."
"I am not the one that constantly tortured a prisoner and left her in sensory-deprived solitary for over a day and a half. You did not give me anything but water for a week. You treated me like I was worse than trash. You made my friends watch, trying to force them to talk. My teammate was punished for trying to help me. You are a pompous, irrational idiot, Ross. You think carefully what you say next to me. I am not what you say I am. The media will shred you along with me and my team for what happened."
"You don't have any footage from the interrogation room. There are no cameras there. You can't prove what happened."
Got you. “Sam and I are walking proof, Ross. I may not be able to prove you broke my arm, but I can certainly prove it happened there."
"Nobody will believe you."
"I think they will. Let my friends go home. Moreover, I want it in writing that all of them have a right at any point to house arrest if they choose or are located. All of them." Wanda felt thoroughly inspired with this idea. Though she could still feel herself shaking, it felt strangely satisfying to 'calmly' threaten that man. I could not do this alone, but I'm not alone. I have friends with me. Friends that care and are willing to support me.
"Fine. All except Steve Rogers, the Winter Soldier, and you."
"I said all of them." Wanda glanced at Nat, who was showing her the laptop cursor hovering over the file to the day 1 versus day 19 footage clip, and instantly understood. Nat means threaten to release another. “You have ten seconds. I will leak another video."
"You can't do that-"
"Eight, seven, six...I've got it up now. Don't test me. I will do it."
"All right, all right. Rogers too, but he'll be restrained."
"Like you did me? Absolutely not. Two sec-"
"Rogers doesn't need a shock collar like you do. You had to be tortured to be neutralized at all."
Wanda buried her face in Nat's shoulder. I'm so tired. So, so tired. She could hear Tony talking on the other end, saying thank you for admitting the truth that he had been knowingly allowing a nineteen-year-old girl to be tortured, enhanced or not, and then a snarky, "Go ahead and hang up now, Wanda Maximoff. Recording complete."
Natasha quickly ended the call and their own recording before holding a trembling Wanda close. "It's okay. You did fine. It's over," she said quietly. She knew there were scarlet wisps hazing both of the younger girl's hands, and ignored this aside from gently nudging at her injured arm. "Don't use your magic with that arm yet, Wanda."
The scarlet wisps dissipated, though Wanda didn't move otherwise. Forcing herself through that phone call was incredibly draining, and even though she knew she had done exactly what she was supposed to do- threaten Ross without explicitly threatening to actually use her magic on him, especially not any mind-control sort of things- she couldn't erase the feeling that she'd just left that horrible place all over again. Ross's voice burned her ears. Nat was still holding her. She would concentrate on that. I am safe. It's over and I don't have to talk to him anymore. I'm not in awful pain anymore. I am not there. I'm not.
"Did we really do the right thing leaving her to have to handle talking to that man?" Scott asked worriedly.
Natasha nodded, kept a tight hold on her younger teammate, and rubbed her shoulder reassuringly. "Yes. Because now he will assume Wanda is alone, since presumably if we were with her, the phone call would've been a team effort. Now he'll think she's operating on her own, which will inherently help her stay hidden since she isn't."
Scott looked somewhat mollified, but seeing Wanda clinging to her friend made her look younger than she really was, and she still reminded him of Cassie. Cassie was never in the Raft. Wanda was not in the Raft now. They were fine; they were safe. "Okay. Sorry, just don't want Toulouse hurt again."
Wanda heard this and relaxed a bit. Scott's silly nickname didn't annoy her like Tony's did, and he had been right there with her on the Raft, another source of support just like Clint, even though she hadn't been able to talk to him after being forbidden from talking lest she be shocked again and again even more for it. Sam had gotten himself hurt trying to get help for her. Though she still didn't say anything aloud now, she did pull her good hand free from Nat's hug and signed, I-M O-K. S-A-F-E W-I-T-H F-R-I-E-N-D-S.
The sudden quiet quacking alert from Wanda's phone made all of them startle a bit but then laugh. "Well, she does like ducks," Sam deadpanned.
Wanda reached to check, trying to hold onto Natasha with her bad hand. The text message was just Vision, which was a major relief, just his kind formal words apologizing for not being on the phone call due to Tony saying Vision would ruin the plan because he would visibly care for her too much. "Nat, answer him...please?" Wanda whispered. C-A-N-T T-Y-P-E.
Natasha sighed and asked for one of their teammates to grab one of the extra blankets stashed in the bathroom closet with the towels. Instantly Scott darted out and returned with two extra blankets. Nat wrapped one around Wanda quickly. "Look, if you want me to text Vision, you have to tell me what you want to say. Or, you could use the speech to text function and do it yourself."
"...You, please." Wanda knew quite well Vision wouldn't mind if she just replied later when her hand wasn't shaking so much, but she worried he might be trying to give them important information and waiting for her to reply.
"Wanda, I am not texting your boyfriend pretending to be you."
"For heaven's sake, you two, just text him and say it's you, and that Wanda is okay but can't text right now," Sam said quietly. "He's a synthezoid robot. He might not process human emotions well, but he sure as hell knows and understands Wanda."
Immediately a reply pinged back, ’Please give her a hug. Everything is signed now. The only difference is that the secretary wants the quinjet turned over. Please take care of her. I will be sending details shortly.'
______________
"Shortly" turned out to mean fifteen minutes, by which time Wanda still felt off-kilter and shaky inside, but much better. "Vis says Scott and Clint should drop the quinjet directly at the Compound within the next twenty-four hours," she reported. "And that Nat and Sam are approved for house arrest as well. Steve...Raft, but not...treated like I was. Nothing for me or Steve's friend other than..." Wanda trailed off and showed Nat the screen. I can't live restrained like that again, even if I was guaranteed actual food and not being tortured all the time.
Still, Wanda found it reassuring that at least Natasha, Sam, and Steve would not be mistreated should they be caught.
Natasha sighed. "Okay. That's much more than we expected, and we didn't have to use any more of that footage or the pictures, at least not right now." Privately, she also thought there was another advantage here- should something go poorly, one of the remaining rogues could always 'let' themselves be caught to give Wanda a chance to slip away or protect Bucky should he ever leave Wakanda. "Let's plan quickly here. Twenty-four hours isn't much time. Wanda, could you fly the two of us up to the quinjet if you had to?"
Wanda stared at her friend, a bit puzzled by that request. "Not with my arm still messed up. I could try, but..." She gingerly reached inside for her magic with her bad hand, which did as she instructed it to, but hiccuped painfully as it gathered around her fingers all the same. I could force it. “Um...I'm not sure I'd trust this honestly."
Natasha quickly stilled Wanda's hand. "Stop that. I should have clarified. Can you do it without using the injured arm at all?"
I don't know. "Maybe, but I don't really know how," Wanda told her, "and I won't risk dropping you. What about Sam? His Falcon suit could help him do that safely...right?"
"Sure, but that isn't exactly discreet," Sam pointed out. "Why don't we call Steve and get his input too?"
The second they had Steve on the phone, he immediately asked if Clint, Nat, and Wanda were safe and sound. "We're all fine, Steve," Natasha assured him. She gave him a quick explanation of the information they had.
They decided to meet in the plain of Beauce, which Nat called Grenier de la France. Sam would stay put in the safe house, Scott and Clint would travel together, and Wanda and Nat would do the same. Wanda was not looking forward to navigating out of the city, but it had to be better than the airport, at least.
_______________
Much to her surprise, the trip out of the city was completely uneventful. No one bothered Natasha or her at all. The worst thing was simply being tired. When they did finally reach their chosen meeting spot, it was completely dark as planned. Steve appeared out of the darkness and startled Wanda so badly that she dropped her crutch and immediately went into defensive mode, scarlet hazing her fingers.
"Oh. Wanda, it's just me. I'm so glad you are feeling better." Steve sounded extremely relieved and caught a very tired Wanda as she dispersed the magic and stumbled into him. "Nat, is she really all right?" he asked quietly, quite familiar with Wanda's penchant to say she was fine when she was not.
"Traveling this much isn't ideal, and she certainly isn't ready for any missions yet, but she is fine," Natasha assured him.
"Will you wait for Clint and Scott? I'll get Wanda settled inside."
"I'm right here," Wanda said firmly. "I am just tired, not unconscious this time." She felt Steve's arm tense around her shoulders and decided not to complain any further. Like Scott and Sam, Steve was just concerned since he hadn't seen her in person for weeks. Stumbling and reacting by summoning her power did not look like she was 'fine'.
"You and Nat seem happier," Steve commented. "Sam, Scott, and I made sure there was space in here for you to rest and lie down comfortably if you needed to."
Wanda nodded and settled herself against the pillows that had been set up for her. "Thank you. I really am fine, but this feels so nice. I really appreciate it. You have all been spoiling me." I don't even know how to explain. I hate being fussed over, but people trying to help me after everything...
"Let us after what happened. Perhaps it also helps the rest of the team since Nat and I couldn't get you four out for so long."
"Fair enough."
"You really do feel better now, though?"
"Don't I look better? Really, I wasn't trying to be funny before," Wanda said quietly. "Nat is right. I'm not up to missions, but I feel much better. What about your friend? Have you heard from Bucky?"
Steve shook his head sadly. "Not yet, but Princess Shuri is working on figuring out how to help...neutralize the Winter Soldier trigger word programming. Bucky decided to go back into cryo in the meantime. I thought you could help-"
"Me? You wanted me to help heal Bucky's head?" Wanda blinked in surprise. Steve just assumes I could help his friend. Even after watching me mess up in Lagos and what I did to him last year.
Steve looked at her thoughtfully. "Can you? Because I suspect you are capable and don't know how. That's the only reason I haven't mentioned it to you before."
"I don't know for sure, but I think so. I...I thought of it after you and Nat rescued me, but..." Wanda twisted a scarlet wisp around her fingers and studied it as she finished, "I didn't suggest it because I didn't think you or Bucky would want me rooting around in his head. Not after last year and now Lagos. And I was such a mess." I felt dumb thinking I could do that. Though she hadn't really interacted much with Steve's friend, she could sense the hurt and guilt radiating from him all the same.
"Before, he said if you told me explicitly that you could do it, he would trust us," Steve said quietly. "So if Bucky was here now, you're right that he would say no, because you don't trust yourself to do it, and I knew that and told him so. But once you do? Then he would change his mind."
"Thank you, Steve," Wanda whispered. "That actually...feels lovely to hear. More than if he had just told you to make or let me try to help." It's reasonable, understanding, and it...validates me, while protecting himself from potentially being harmed further. My bad thought processes and mentally ripping myself apart...I think he knows.
Steve nodded, understanding exactly what Wanda meant. "Do you want anything while we wait for the others?"
"No. I'm just happy to see everyone again. I do not think we need to wait any longer anyway- I hear them."
Sure enough, Nat, Clint, and Scott piled in. Like Wanda, they received a Cap hug also, and Wanda watched the others quietly, still thinking about the last time she had been on the quinjet. Last time, she'd been so badly hurt she could barely move, let alone talk normally or get up on her own. It sort of made Nat's insistence that she was already much better sink in more. I am much better. I don't feel entirely back to normal, but I'm mostly just tired now.
"See you soon," Steve was saying now, which made tired Wanda give him a quick hug. "Sam and I will message you and Nat when I get back to the safe house."
Once Steve was gone and on his way back to the house, Nat headed to the cockpit and put in the coordinates for where she and Wanda needed to be dropped before Clint and Scott returned to the States. Though this trip should have been happier, Wanda thought it oddly seemed solemn. Scott and Clint were subdued, and Scott plopped himself near her looking sad. "Cassie will be so happy to see you," Wanda told him.
"Of course she will. Can't help thinking it might be a long time, or never, before seeing any of you again. I'll miss you."
The group was quiet, just nibbling on snacks and resting during the trip. Wanda fell asleep leaning against Clint's shoulder, and he sighed and just let her be.
________________
"You want us to drop you two here, Nat?" Clint asked in confusion. "This is the middle of nowhere."
"Exactly. I have a contact meeting us here in," Nat checked the time, "about thirty minutes. Wanda and I will be fine."
Scott glanced around the not-quite-dawn darkness outside. "Maybe we should wait for your contact to get here? Just in case? Besides, it's raining."
Wanda found this quite funny and gave Scott an amused look. "Scott, you do realize I have the Black Widow with me, and I can defend myself now if I need to. You and Clint need to get back fast before our time is up."
"She's right. We have one chance for this to work, and we're running low on time as it is. Leave us here. Rain won't affect us," Natasha said firmly. "It may affect your trip back. If it's safe, we will message you as soon as we can. Vision can help us with that, hopefully."
Nobody felt much like saying extended long goodbyes, so the four of them only exchanged warm hugs and nothing more was said at all, other than Scott's lighthearted, "Keep Toulouse safe, Black Widow!" which made everyone smile.
"We aren't going to get to see them again, are we?" Wanda asked quietly once the quinjet was gone.
"Probably not anytime soon, but we're all safe, and you have Vision who's capable of at least getting messages to them untraced." Natasha guided the two of them through tall grass over underneath a tree. "Now we wait for Yelena."
"We're going to be soggy by the time she gets here," Wanda said, but she sounded more amused than annoyed. Still, she shivered and stayed close to Nat, who pulled one of the big blankets from the quinjet over their heads. "You remind me of Pietro. We must have sat huddled outside in the rain hundreds of times, just like this," she whispered, "but we didn't have an emergency thermal blanket, so we would still eventually get soaking wet. But he always took care of me. Like you."
Natasha did not particularly want to think about little Wanda and her lost twin trapped outside in the rain with nowhere to go, but Wanda did not sound upset at all; she was just sitting there peacefully, her good arm looped around her friend tightly. "Thank you for the compliment," she told Wanda, because from Wanda those were very trusting and complimentary words.
"Pietro said you were pretty," Wanda said suddenly. "I think if he was still here, he would try to get you to go out with him, and use the dumbest pickup lines ever."
This made Nat laugh. Wanda sounded very matter-of-fact about this. "He would probably be disappointed."
"No, he knew you'd say no. He would just ask anyway on the one percent chance you might say yes. I always thought it was funny, because when we were older he would confidently walk up and ask people out. People who never would give him the time of day if they knew."
"Knew...?"
"That we were homeless teenagers, that's all," Wanda said softly. "But nobody expected Pietro's behavior from kids like us, so sometimes it worked. And, well...we weren't educated at all...after, but we still knew multiple languages. So we could go places we 'weren't supposed to' more easily." She closed her eyes and sighed, ignoring the twinge remaining in her ribs. "I hope Yelena doesn't hate me."
"She won't hate you."
"Nat, I can feel you being worried she won't like me. I am not purposely reading you, either."
Natasha gave Wanda a comforting squeeze. "She'll like you once she meets you."
__________________
"So. You are the one my sister talks about all the time. She would not come back because of you, you took her away." This was the first introduction Wanda heard from Yelena once the loud helicopter landed nearby for them, the morning sky lighter and a bit pink along with the gray clouds.
Wanda backed up, her gaze hurt and slightly angry as she studied the other girl closely. Yelena's blonde hair was twisted up into intricate braids, much like Nat had done for Wanda before many times. She wore a dark green vest with pockets and seemed to be an inch or two shorter than Wanda herself. I knew it. I told Nat she should come back without me. "Hello," she answered. "I am sorry. She is here now."
Yelena said something rude in Russian to Nat, which made Wanda shoot back that she spoke Russian too.
Natasha took one look at the two pairs of green eyes sending laser beams at each other and stepped between them. "Yelena, you know why I couldn't come sooner. I told you she was injured and couldn't travel yet. Thank you for coming to pick us up."
"She just has busted arm, Natasha. Really? I don't care she's enhanced or not, your team could take care of her. That's not big deal at all."
Wanda decided not to get involved in that discussion beyond tugging the scarf down a bit to expose the damaged skin on her neck, which made Yelena frown and huffily tell her to get in the helicopter. She climbed in and scooted herself in the far back corner, trying to give Nat and her sister some semblance of privacy even with her there. Then she put in her earbuds too so they could talk without her listening to their conversation.
Well, it was nice to know Yelena did not give a single crap about her being enhanced and merely seemed to not like her much for preventing Natasha from returning quickly. That was completely understandable to her, and Wanda knew if she was in Yelena's place, she would probably feel the same. She sort of reminded Wanda of Pietro in an odd sort of way, even though Yelena was the younger sibling like her, not the older one like Pietro.
The second Nat climbed in and saw Wanda quietly sitting in the back corner, she sighed. "You hurt her feelings," she scolded. "You knew I was bringing her, and you said you wanted me to anyway."
"That girl is the mass destruction weapon the media is harassing. Who the hell finds her frightening?" Yelena was nonplussed; now she was extra frustrated and irritated, because this did not seem fair. "I have seen news, a little. What nonsense media believes she is faulted for that bomb?"
Nat sighed and ducked into the back of the helicopter. "You do realize she's a very, very powerful enhanced person, right?"
"She doesn't look like it. She acts like the girls Madame B would let be killed and you know it. Too many feelings. Too attached to people. She clings to you like...I did when we were children."
"Because that woman was such a great judge of who's strong and who isn't," Natasha deadpanned, which made both ex-Widows flinch. "You let Wanda be and quit picking on her."
"I am not picking. I'm saying the truth. It isn't fair to her." Yelena glanced back to see her sister being oddly gentle and bringing Wanda closer to the cockpit so she could be included in the conversation too. The phone and earbuds went in a pocket, and Wanda nodded at whatever quiet thing Natasha had whispered to her. It reminded her of when she and Natasha were small and Nat was protective then too. "So could you have contained that bomb if you had more time?"
Wanda blinked in surprise and rather wished she could retreat back into the corner. Someone she did not know bringing up Lagos in such a questioning, blunt, curious manner felt more strange than hurtful, and she looked down at her hands. "I don't know," she said finally. Please don't hate me. You don't have to like me, I would never expect that, just...ignore me then.
"Okay." Yelena's natural aura seemed bright and colorful to Wanda, her mind loud to the point Wanda felt like there were emotions screaming at her. There was jealousy and anger and confusion. There was happiness and love and relief.
There was not any fear, at least not on the surface where Wanda could not really shut off passively sensing things completely, and she refused to actively intrude further.
"If I don't like you, it's because you took my sister, nothing else," Yelena said, which made Wanda feel better rather than worse. "I don't care you are a weird enhanced person or whatever."
Wanda smiled a little and relaxed. "That is fair. Thank you. I wouldn't like me either."
Nat wanted to interfere with their interaction, but both Yelena and Wanda seemed to feel better already and were no longer snapping at each other. This was a win for now.
___________________
Upon arriving safe at Melina's and the three of them got out, Wanda glanced at Nat in concern when Natasha froze seeing someone standing outside the house, leaning against it and sipping water. It was no longer raining, at least not here, though the low-hanging clouds remained. "Nat, who is that? That isn't Melina or Alexei. You showed me pictures of them, and-"
"You didn't think to tell me Antonia was here?" Natasha hissed at Yelena, who looked awfully guilty. "Why should that girl be forced to see me? I ruined her life."
"I'm sorry, I was going to say, but then I thought you might not come, and I missed you so much already. And she said she didn't care and it was fine..."
Wanda dropped her bags and edged closer to the mysterious girl instinctively, who turned away from her as if hiding something. "...Are you one of the freed Widows?" Wanda asked in Russian, her voice quiet. "Antonia, right?"
The girl hesitated and then said simply, "Tell your friend she didn't ruin my life. I'm not...exactly a Widow."
Wanda was vaguely aware of Nat and Yelena quietly fussing behind her, but something had drawn her to this girl and she didn't move. "I don't understand."
Antonia turned toward Wanda, looking straight at her. Deep burn scars covered half her face and disappeared down her neck beneath her shirt. "Do you understand now? She blames herself for this instead of my father. I know what he was. Being willing to sacrifice one girl to save thousands more by attempting to assassinate him makes sense. I'd do it too."
Wanda bit her lip, unsure what to say to that, and more than a little confused. Does Antonia have to do with whatever Nat felt so guilty for the other day? I don't understand. She put her hand to her neck, which suddenly seemed like a big nothing compared to Antonia's scars, which the other girl couldn't hide at all if she wanted to. "I already saw. I...don't care. I don't know what happened to you, but I'm sorry, for whatever it was. It looks like it hurt," she whispered. "I suppose you already know who I am. Wanda, the enhanced girl that can wreck things with her mind."
Antonia smiled, suspecting that Wanda was probably hiding scars of her own, considering her reaction or lack thereof. "Antonia. I can copy anyone's fighting style by observing them. I...used to be Taskmaster, but I am not that brainless controlled...thing anymore." She looked Wanda up and down briefly and added, "Probably can't copy yours much. You definitely aren't a normal fighter and I don't copy innate superpowers. I have seen videos of you fighting. You are sloppy and rely on raw power to fight instead."
Unsure what to say to that, Wanda pulled a bit of scarlet to her fingers and then dissolved them again. "It sounds like I don't...bother you."
"No...?"
In a second, Wanda found herself slammed against the grass hard, which honestly really hurt her still-healing ribs and arm, but she did not think Antonia meant her any harm all the same. Wanda realized she had probably just stepped into a tiny glimpse of Nat's old world. Nat has done this to me countless times. And it happened again.
Across the yard, Yelena held Natasha back from interfering. "Does she have something against Wanda instead?" Nat asked Yelena quietly.
"No. Come on, you know how we were. Not supposed to care about any of the other girls. But we did anyway. Maybe pretended not to. But-"
"But we did, and Antonia being forced into being Taskmaster meant she didn't even get those bits of interaction where we all braided each other's hair and beat each other black and blue to establish order or one of the only ways we could interact with 'friends'." Natasha wondered if she had done the wrong thing bringing Wanda here in the first place.
But in a second, Antonia had climbed off of Wanda and held out a hand to her. Wanda accepted and stood up, brushing her skirt off, and decided she rather liked this girl. "You don't care that I'm able to...mind-control people?" Wanda asked carefully, holding her bad arm against her chest a bit awkwardly.
"I think that if you were going to do that, you would have done it already to keep me from pinning you. You passed." Antonia tilted her head, watching Wanda and feeling a bit confused. "You aren't looking at me like it's...difficult to look at."
"Mine are just easier to hide. I have-"
"My girls are here!" a loud voice boomed happily.
Antonia rolled her eyes slightly. "And that is Alexei Shostakov, the Red Guardian. I cannot wait until Lerato returns. Then I will not have to see or hear that man any longer," she informed Wanda. "If you are friends with Natalia, he will be all over you."
Natasha quickly pushed Wanda behind her, leaving their bags again, and Yelena did the same with Antonia.
"What you two hiding the red enhanced girl and Taskmaster for?"
"I told you stop calling me that a hundred times," Antonia muttered, not particularly loud enough to be heard.
In a second, Wanda moved in front of the others and planted herself firmly, her eyes glowing red. "She doesn't want to be called that. And I am not 'red enhanced girl', either. I have a name." Wanda did not have any good impressions of Alexei at all, either from Natasha's words about him or from the first few seconds she'd seen him so far. He was clearly not like the horrible men on the Raft one bit, but he had hurt her best-besides-Pietro friend, not by accident, and this was unforgivable to her. Natasha and Yelena instinctively moving to protect her and Antonia was rather telling, and it turned a switch in her head that she should defend Nat if necessary.
"Alexei, you are being bit much again. Leave girls be. All of them. You bother them." An older dark-haired woman that Wanda knew must be Melina came out, steering a confused Alexei back inside and whispering something that made him laugh. She re-emerged alone. "Natalia, introduce your friend. Yelena, Antonia, take all bags inside, please."
Much to Wanda's surprise, they all obeyed. Wanda wasn't sure what to think of Melina at all. She hugged Nat (Nat tensed and then relaxed), and then she studied Wanda closely for a minute and quietly but firmly told her to stop looking soft.
"Don't tell Wanda that. She's safe here," Natasha said firmly.
"Dreykov would chew her up if-"
"He's dead. I don't care what that man would have liked to do with her, because he can't. Melina, I don't want you teaching Wanda to stop anything she does. She's fine just as she is; she hasn't been poisoned by the Red Room like the rest of us. She knows to hide her emotions when she has to already."
Melina gave both of them a dubious look but didn't press further. "Come inside, girls."
Wanda could tell Nat was still slightly tense simply from her body language putting herself ever so slightly between Melina and her, no magic involved whatsoever. "Thank you for having us over," Wanda said politely, old lessons ingrained in her as a small child from her own parents saying she should be nice to the hosts even if she did not like or trust them.
She had rather assumed she and Nat would end up sharing a small room, but instead she was supposed to be sharing with Antonia, who looked as wary about that as she did. Antonia was indifferent to Nat entirely, but Nat gave Wanda a hug and immediately slipped away into the room she was supposed to share with Yelena. This seemed logical, but Wanda did not like being left on her own with someone else she didn't know whatsoever beyond the short conversation outside, and she was still worried about Nat in general. "May I use the bathroom?" she asked, pulling a dry outfit out of her suitcase."
"Sure, but I don't care if you change in here," Antonia said, flipping through a cat magazine. "It's right around the corner, on your left."
Wanda slipped out and changed out of the wet clothes as quickly as she could; then brushed her hair. She still couldn't braid her own hair with her arm in the splint, so she just left it loose, not particularly wanting to bother with trying to use her magic to braid it at the moment.
"Wanda, are you in there?" Nat's voice sounded from outside the door.
"Yes...one second..." Wanda gathered the wet clothes into a small pile and opened the door. "Antonia doesn't hate you," she said immediately.
"Did she tell you what I did to her?"
"She said you were trying to assassinate her father and she understood sacrificing one girl to save thousands more."
Natasha closed her eyes and sighed. "That girl is Antonia Dreykov, Wanda. Clint and I attempted to take out Dreykov- her father- years ago. We believed he was dead for a long long time, up until recently." She gave Wanda a quick explanation of how she and Yelena had really taken down the Red Room for real this time. "I'm not sure how much of that you knew or inferred already, but what happened to his daughter-"
"Was not your fault," Wanda interrupted immediately. "Nat, that man chose to turn his own child into Taskmaster just because he didn't want to look at her after she was burned in that explosion. He was a child trafficker. He tortured and abused you, Yelena, and all of the other girls in the Red Room. Melina too." Wanda bit her lip and added, "Why do you think she scolded me for 'looking soft'? Saying Dreykov would chew me up too? Because she knows. I did not go through what you did, but I know what being scared of exposing feelings feels like." I am just no good at really hiding mine. Mine leak everywhere.
"Do you mind if I braid your hair?" Nat asked.
Wanda instinctively hugged her friend as tightly as she could. I think doing that calms Nat down as much as it does me. “I would like that very much."
Notes:
Yes, I’ll have Wanda and Yelena interact more next chapter lol. We all knew that wasn’t going to be smooth sailing between those two xD
Antonia deserves more attention and I had to have her show up:) I have plans for her too! Honestly the dynamic with this group is really interesting to write, especially watching them through Wanda’s eyes since she hasn’t been part of the Red Room herself. She can understand much of it since she’s experienced her own awful things, but still.
Anyways! Any feedback is much appreciated<3
Chapter 21: Chapter 21
Summary:
In which Wanda and Nat spend some time with Yelena & co. at Melina’s.
Notes:
I’m so happy Nat and Wanda finally arrived in Russia lol!
Again, I apologize for the chapter being late...good gosh the holiday season makes me so so tired. >_< I will do my best not to take so long next chapter!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda thought lunch was tense with the entire group at the table, but it seemed everyone was tense except for noisy Alexei, who clearly liked to hear himself talk too much. She'd hung back in a corner until Natasha pulled out a chair and physically guided her to it to make her sit, which made both Melina and Yelena look at them disapprovingly; but Nat ignored this and quietly reminded her she was safe here. Wanda understood this, but she still felt strange and out of place all the same.
"Kompot, shchi, pelmeni. Eat. You two particular," Alexei ordered, pointing at Nat and Wanda. "Natasha, your friend is little wisp. Does she not eat anything?"
Wanda clenched her good hand into a fist under the table and kept her mouth shut, restraining herself from snapping or threatening the man with her magic to make him be quiet. Yelena was pointedly ignoring him entirely and talking to Nat, who seemed to be doing the same, though she did give Wanda's arm a gentle squeeze.
"It's good. Have you had this before?" Antonia asked.
"When I was little," Wanda said, which was true; she could remember very similar dishes at her friend's house and being sent home to her own family's apartment with leftovers. She nibbled at the lunch, which was admittedly quite good. Soup reminded her of being trapped in the Raft with nothing to eat except a little watery thin soup to drink that made her think of muddy water, but Melina's soup was different. If I finish it, I am going to be sick. What is wrong with me? I even ate soup from Panera Bread when we were still at the vacation house. This is better than Panera Bread soup.
Wanda's hand shook and she quickly set the spoon down.
Natasha frowned and glanced at Wanda, who seemed to have drooped a bit, her arms wrapped around her middle again. "Eat only what you want. It doesn't matter," she said quietly so only Wanda would hear her.
Wanda suspected it did too matter and Nat did not care, and would defend her behavior regardless. Alexei was already obnoxiously trying to convince her friend to make her eat, which just made it impossible to eat anything in the first place without her stomach turning over. Finally she excused herself and stumbled outside. They are all going to kick me out. I don't fit here either.
The little bit she had managed to get down made a reappearance on the ground, and she sat on the front steps with her head resting on her knees. Why could she not just behave in a normal manner and eat the stupid lunch? She even liked the lunch. Someone sat next to her and she immediately flinched and moved away. "I am sorry. You don't have to be out here, just leave me alone."
"No."
Now Wanda did look up; that voice was not Nat at all- it was Yelena. "Why are you-"
"What wrong with you? You defend Antonia and yourself when Alexei is rude. Then run away to get sick out here because of lunch."
"I don't know."
"Something with soup," Yelena prompted.
Wanda did not want to talk about the Raft food or lack thereof. She tensed and didn't answer. "Why are you checking on me? You don't even like me."
"I do not have to like you. My sister does. She treats you like another little sister. She is in there chewing Alexei out right now." Yelena studied Wanda for a minute and then added, "Why you still wearing that scarf? It isn't cold. You are safe here."
"I don't want to look at it."
"Look who you are with. Why the hell would you hide battle scars here? Nobody cares. You're ridiculous."
Wanda's hand flitted to her neck as she squeezed her eyes shut. I don't know. “It isn't even from a battle or anything like that, it's-"
"You survived being tortured in some shitty government prison. Battle scars," Yelena interrupted. She had known from Natasha a little of what happened, simply that her sister's friend had been mistreated badly while in that max security prison, but all the same, Wanda mostly just baffled her. She'd immediately reached out to Antonia and defended both Antonia and herself, snapping at Alexei, but then she also ran from the table and seemed to have retreated into herself somehow.
Wanda did tug the scarf off, but she looked away and wouldn't meet Yelena's eyes. "Happy now?" she muttered.
"What the hell were they doing to you?"
"Shock collar, okay? I do not want to talk about it." Much to Wanda's surprise, Yelena simply said okay and dropped it, which made it easier for her to talk in the first place. "I...know I'm not like all of you. I have no right to be...like...this, here. I'm sorry. I wouldn't have survived what all of you went through."
"Maybe not. But because I think Madame B would have killed you. Your heart powers you too much. And you can't hide it," Yelena said softly. "Too unpredictable. Too caring. I saw you clinging to my sister on way here. I saw girls like you in Red Room. It is why they...separated Natasha and me as kids. But comparing trauma stuff is stupid. Weren't you experimented on? You just have other issues instead."
Why are you being nice to me? Or care at all? Wanda touched the nearly invisible but easily felt little dent on her hand where Hydra had kept an IV port inserted for a long, long time on both Pietro and her. She could remember having it put in somewhat roughly and then a bandage wrapped around her hand tightly to keep it in place.
”You tear that out and we will tie you down and you will never see him."
"Yes," Wanda said aloud after a minute, shoving those memories away. They were not even quite so horribly bad to her now, because at least Pietro was still in them and she wanted her precious twin back. She could remember him comforting her across their mental connection, giving her warm hugs once they were no longer separated. If Pietro could see me now, I don't know what he would think. I am better than last year...right?
"Do you want to see pigs? Natasha said you like animals."
Wanda nodded and stood up. "That sounds good."
"Melina named one Alexei," Yelena went on, clearly entertained by this.
Wanda didn't answer, but she smiled hearing that.
"And nobody but Mr. Obnoxious will care you not eat much. Melina always feeds leftovers to the pigs anyway. You can get something else later."
"I really did like the lunch. I just..." Wanda paused, still unsure herself why that shchi had set her off when she genuinely liked the dish. "You had to drink your soup fast or not get anything at all. The Raft soup was very bad. Melina's is delicious, but..." she trailed off, struggling a bit to keep up with Yelena.
"Alexei's been suitably scolded. He will probably continue to press eating, but Natasha will keep him away from you," Yelena assured her. "Ignoring him is best," she said knowingly.
Wanda studied the pigs snuffling around in their pen. They really were cute, and she was still surprised Yelena had randomly started being nice to her. "Did Nat send you out here?"
"Yes, but I don't hate you, okay? You just make me jealous. I see how my sister treats you. She talks about you all the time in her messages. You replaced me. That feels shitty. It's not you. You are weird, but I like you personally fine."
I don't want to be a replacement. “I never wanted to keep Nat away from you," Wanda said quietly, still looking at the sniffly pigs. "I...I don't know what she told you, but she definitely could have left to come see you sooner. I'm sorry. Sometimes I can't...function on my own. I know that. That is why she stayed with me. Not because I am physically hurt and couldn't do much before." Yelena deserves the truth, even if it hurts me. I will give that to her.
There was a long awkward silence and then, "Okay. I figured that much out, but...you telling me yourself is nice. She loves you very much, Wanda. I only just got her back. But I can see that."
"Why are you being so nice to me?"
"Who is being nice? That is the truth. Facts. She would not have stayed with you for weeks if not. I heard enough about you before she left before. 'My friend is trapped in the Raft. My friend must be being mistreated there. I need to get her out. The rest of the team is probably fine.' She said I would like you. She especially hated she couldn't get you sooner." Yelena sounded regretful and upset now, and she sighed. "You are lucky to have her."
"I know." Wanda wanted to scream into the void I am not lucky, I think I have the worst luck ever, I miss Pietro and I'm tired, I am so tired of trying to keep going like everything is normal, but she stayed quiet. She could not be upset with Yelena for saying that. Not when Nat was most definitely the best friend she could ever wish for. She did feel lucky to have Natasha willing to help, willing to accept her even after what she'd done to Nat last year. Nat was not Pietro and never would be, but she did still help that hole left in her heart where her missing sibling should be feel better. Being here was terrifying because it made her worry another close friend would leave her all alone again. How could she tell someone like Yelena, who was used to surviving on her own even if it hurt, that she had never known how to live on her own?
She'd lost Pietro and almost immediately latched onto Nat and Clint, who hadn't pushed her away and had been willing to give that broken version of her a chance. I am okay. For me, I am okay, now.
___________________
When they finally headed back inside, the entire table had been cleared except for Wanda's- and the shchi was suspiciously missing- and everyone was gone from the kitchen except Melina. Yelena left Wanda in the kitchen and retreated to her own room she was sharing with Natasha. "Eat the rest. Natasha explained soup was not good for you now," Melina ordered.
"It was me, not the shchi. It was good. I'm sorry I couldn't eat it."
"You should not let anyone know triggers. Bad plan. You will end up hurt."
Wanda had the distinct impression the older ex-Widow was disgusted, but not precisely with her. Since she didn't know how to react to that comment, she nibbled at the rest of the lunch instead. Melina did not offer to reheat it like Laura would, nor did she offer any other options, but she sat at the table nearby and stayed close. "I feel like you are trying to read me," Wanda said finally.
"Yes, I would like to know the girl that turned Natasha so soft. Feelings are dangerous, and yet yours are written all over you. They do not hide. I think you use them as weapon."
This made Wanda smile ruefully as she let a bit of scarlet dance around her fingers. She isn't wrong at all. “My powers are connected to how I feel. I think..." she hesitated, her expression falling entirely, "I don't know entirely how it even works. You saw what I did on the news. I messed up."
"Bomb on ground. Dead Wanda, dead Captain America, many many dead civilians. Bomb in building. Alive Wanda, alive Captain America, eleven dead civilians and some injured. Collateral damage from less bad choice of two bad options. Normal." Melina did not look at all disturbed, and Wanda's fist clenched.
"Melina, those people are still dead, because of me. Because I messed up."
"Really? I know you Avengers avoid killing. What has been put in head that you think suicide bomber exploding is your fault?"
Wanda pushed her chair back and stood up, her eyes flashing. "I understand Rumlow chose it. I understand, logically, I shouldn't blame myself." Because Nat has tried to help convince me a hundred times. “But I still feel responsible. What good is the amount of power I have if I can't use it properly? I don't care if collateral damage was okay in the Red Room. That place was trash and you and Nat and Yelena and Antonia and everyone else never, ever should have been put through that. If he wasn't dead already, I would kill Dreykov myself and rip him to pieces." Then she sat down and ate the rest of the lunch as quickly as she could.
"There she is. There is defensive fire part of you. Good." Melina's voice was strangely gentle now.
"What is going on?" Nat asked sharply. "Melina, what did you do to Wanda?"
"I made her defend herself."
"She said those poor dead people in Lagos were collateral damage," Wanda said, her eyes still blazing.
Privately Nat had no intentions of disagreeing with Melina on that, because as horrible as it sounded, it wasn't really untrue, either. When Melina added that Wanda had said she would kill Dreykov herself if he wasn't already dead, Natasha squeezed Wanda's shoulder gently. That was not surprising at all; Wanda might be quiet often and did not want to hurt people, but she also hated people like Dreykov and Nat had no doubt in her mind Wanda most certainly would do that if she'd had the chance. "Please don't purposely push her buttons," Natasha said finally, and took Wanda back to the bedroom she was sharing with Yelena.
"Nat, don't you want to spend time with just Yelena? If Antonia doesn't mind, I can just go rest in the other room," Wanda offered.
"Are you tired?"
"Yes," Wanda said, which was the truth. She gave Nat a hug. Thank you for being there for me. Right now it's your turn to take care of yourself. “I'm okay, as long as I do not have to be around Alexei."
Natasha could tell this was the truth and Wanda was not just pretending to be okay. Whatever had set her off seemed to have left her more at ease than before, even though she was tired. Maybe whatever Melina had done poking Wanda's buttons wasn't a bad thing. "All right. Come knock whenever you like. You can do whatever you want, of course, just...if you decide to go outside, please text me? You're not a child, but I need to know where you are."
"I know. Thank you for caring to ask."
_________________
Wanda still knocked before going into the little bedroom she was supposed to be sharing with Antonia, who was currently lying on her bed flipping through her cat magazine again. "You can just come in, Wanda. You're weird, changing in the bathroom and knocking before entering your room," Antonia said in Russian.
Wanda rather liked that Antonia clearly just assumed she understood, so she decided to speak the same. "It's your room. I don't want to barge in."
"Now it's half yours, so. What about the clothes? Are you hiding a tail or something?"
Wanda perched herself on 'her' bed and tried not to laugh. "No, I just...I suppose I am just a bit private. I do not like people seeing my back, but mostly I just...like being private."
"You have scars there," Antonia said confidently.
"...I do." Wanda could tell Antonia genuinely wanted to see but wouldn't ask, and realized she did not care at all if this girl saw them. She turned her back and tugged her t-shirt up a bit awkwardly, just enough to reveal a little of the scars on her back, clutching the shirt hem tightly. I have not voluntarily showed anyone any of those except Nat.
"Lucky, you can hide that easily. You didn't have to show me any of it. Those aren't burn scars at all. Those look like knife cuts that were never taken care of correctly when you got them."
Probably because Pietro didn't know what to do to help me, really, and Hydra just wanted to make sure I didn't die from that punishment. Wanda picked up her small suitcase with her magic and put it on the bed. When she turned around, Antonia was looking at her curiously. "I'm sorry. My arm still hurts."
Antonia looked like she thought Wanda had grown another head. "Why would you tell someone that?"
"...What?"
"That your arm hurts. Or apologize for using your enhancements to help you do something."
I don't understand. “It's not like I can hide that. I still have a splint on it. And I...know I make people uncomfortable sometimes. I don't want to do that to you." Wanda curled up on her bed instead of looking for what she wanted out of the suitcase, resting the sore arm on one of the pillows.
"I was just fascinated because you were using your weapon to just...help do something so ordinary and small like picking up a suitcase when you have an injured arm. Nothing else. I have judged you already outside, remember?"
"...Yes. I do." Wanda turned over on her side and smiled to herself. "Thank you. I'm glad I met you."
"You are the first non-Widow girl I've met since before the explosion, you know. What do you like to do besides...work? Before the Accords, I mean." Antonia propped herself up on an elbow and looked at the other girl hopefully. "Do you have a boyfriend? Or girlfriend? Did you like school?"
Wanda found being asked such presumably normal questions weird but kind of nice. "I like to read, but I...never had any school after I was ten." She flicked through her phone photos until she found the poorly lit one from the holiday lights show last year, where Nat had taken a picture of Vision and Wanda together standing in front of one of the displays. "There is Vision. I didn't think of him that way then, but..." Wanda trailed off, her cheeks a bit pink. Nat and everyone else already knew, even little Lila.
Antonia smiled. "You look like you feel safe with him," she said wistfully. "Can I see another one?"
Wanda didn't really take pictures often, but she found another one Nat (of course) had taken at the Compound after a training session and then sent to her. In this one Vision was hugging her and she was laughing, little wisps of dark hair escaping her braided ponytail.
"He's funny-looking but also handsome," Antonia decided, sounding quite serious. "I wish Lerato looked at me like that."
Wanda wondered what Pietro would think if he could see her now, an international fugitive in Russia resting and talking about romance clumsily with a girl she barely knew. "I am a twin," she said softly when Antonia asked if she had any sisters or brothers. "Pietro is...dead. I still miss him so much. You didn't...see that on the news?"
"Half the news is false. I wasn't sure if the twin part was true or not."
"Fair."
"I'm sorry, Wanda. I think I don't know how to socialize correctly anymore. I made you cry."
"No, it's...me. Not you."
"Why are you letting me see you cry?"
"Because I don't think you are going to hurt me for it," Wanda whispered, turning over to face the wall. I hate people seeing me cry, but I don't feel unsafe here right now, either.
Antonia did not press, just watched Wanda lay there for a minute and then flopped on her back on her own bed. "I'll spar with you later if you want to?"
"Okay. I would like that." Privately Wanda suspected it would be exactly the same as when she tried to spar with Nat- without using her magic, she would get obliterated almost immediately unless Natasha was purposely going easy on her to help teach her things. And then if she did use her magic, the reverse would happen. All the same, she could tell that was Antonia's way of offering friendship, which was nice.
The two girls lay in silence for awhile until Wanda's phone quacked, which made Antonia laugh. "I just like ducks," Wanda said, and checked the message. Vision had sent another I hope you are safe message, along with asking when it would be okay to come find and visit her. She texted back that she needed to ask Nat, but to her anytime was okay. Almost immediately the phone rang, and she quickly picked up. "Hi, Vis."
Antonia looked at her with great interest, which Wanda pretended not to notice.
"You sound tired. Are you all right?"
This made Wanda smile. "I'm fine. I am tired, but I am okay. I think...I think I might have made a new friend here," she said, glancing at Antonia. Even if Antonia left soon, she seemed like a friend already, at least for now, and making a connection with another girl felt nice.
"I am glad. You deserve it. Please rest. Injured humans need extra rest, not travel halfway around the world." Vision still sounded concerned, and Wanda wished very much that she could see him and give him a hug.
"I miss you," Wanda said quietly. "I know it has not been very long, but I still do."
__________________
The rest of the afternoon passed peacefully. Nat came to check on Wanda after awhile and was glad to find her simply napping on her bed. "Why are you avoiding me?" Antonia asked flatly when Nat seemed to notice her and immediately start to leave. "I told your friend I do not hate you."
Nat looked at Antonia and then at sleeping Wanda. Maybe she was not responsible for Antonia, but her decision when attempting to eliminate Dreykov all those years ago had still directly led to the girl being horrifically injured, and then being treated like an inhuman thing to weaponize by the parent that should have cared for her. Then there was Wanda still recovering from that prison ordeal because she hadn't been able to get Wanda out of that airport safely. "You must blame Clint Barton and me at least somewhat," Natasha said finally.
"Taskmaster did. I don't." Antonia gazed at Nat steadily. "You freed me. You could have left me behind when the Red Room fell, and you did not." She put her hand over her scarred cheek and added, "How about now? I know this is ugly. I was told it enough times. But you still aren't to blame. If you succeeded in assassinating my father all those years ago, would you still feel guilty if you found out about me now?"
Natasha sighed and glanced at sleeping Wanda. "Yes, but I would not regret it, either."
"Then don't regret it now, either, please. I'd sacrifice one girl to save thousands more too." Antonia shrugged and pointed at Wanda. "Your enhanced friend is nice. I like talking to her. Maybe you and Wanda should eliminate that man Ross so you can go home."
"We can't just assassinate someone for causing us trouble," Nat said quietly. As much as I'd like to.
"Why not?" Antonia padded silently into the hall and closed the bedroom door behind her. "Look at your friend. Isn't he responsible for burning her neck and breaking her arm? I saw the leaked security footage clip online. I don't think those are accidents, or things he was forced or manipulated into doing like us. He is just as bad as some of the villains you Avengers have taken down. I think he should die."
Natasha didn't answer for a minute, her body uncharacteristically tense. "As tempting as that is, I can't do that."
"I bet Melina and Yelena would agree with me. He's just another person like my fa-Dreykov. You got rid of him. Why can't we get rid of Ross?" Antonia crossed her arms and leaned against the wall. "How do you know there aren't more innocent people like Wanda in the Raft? He might be torturing more victims right now."
"Somehow I doubt that. He's too busy looking for us."
Antonia smiled a little at that. "Okay, fair. But I still think you should get rid of him." She turned away to retreat back into her room before adding quietly, "I don't think killing someone like Ross automatically means you are reverting back to just the assassin the Red Room made you."
Natasha shook her head hard once Antonia was gone. That comment had struck a nerve and she suddenly wished she had someone else to talk to. Antonia was right- Yelena and Melina would agree. Narcissistic Alexei would probably go assassinate Ross for her and Wanda if she expressed the slightest inkling that she wished it. Wanda hated Ross, but didn't want to kill him. Or rather, she probably sort of did, but would feel horrible afterwards if she carried it out herself.
________________
Wanda woke up close to dinnertime feeling much refreshed compared to earlier. She still felt like her social battery was somewhat drained, but at least her body didn't feel so tired anymore. Unsure if she was supposed to help make dinner or not, she decided to go investigate and ask Melina, figuring if she was told no, then she would just retreat off by herself again.
But when she asked, Melina sent her outside. "Go run with your friend. You need outdoor air."
Wanda wasn't sure how to explain that she probably would tire almost immediately if she tried to go running, but she nodded. Natasha didn't correct Melina either, and followed Wanda outside anyway. "Where is Yelena?" Wanda asked. "I...I'm happy to be around you by myself, but I don't want Yelena to be unhappy either."
"I specifically told her you get an hour all to yourself to do what you please with me once you woke up. She understands," Nat said firmly.
"Really?" Wanda asked suspiciously.
Natasha smiled and nodded. "Yes. She has other friends too, you know; she'll go spend time with Antonia instead. I told you having two of you around didn't mean the other would be ignored." They walked for a bit in a comfortable silence and then Nat asked quietly, "Do you want to kill Ross?"
Wanda tensed and bit her lip. No. I just...I hate him. I don't want him to hurt anyone else or me. “I don't want him anywhere near me. I would not be upset if I...found out he was dead. I would shred him if he hurt you, and I would mind-control him so I could get away if I had to. I don't want to kill him. Why are you asking me that?"
"Because you are the one that man hurt the most, so you have the final say on his fate."
"Your family thinks you should eliminate him," Wanda said flatly. Why is Nat trusting my judgement? I have no experience. I am just...me. The Sokovian refugee enhanced girl that lost her entire family.
"They do. Sometimes old training is hard to break. You have a different perspective of all of us here in Russia. Wanda, you know even Clint was already thinking about it, and he's not been taught...other things like we were." Natasha sighed and looked at Wanda's outstretched hand hazed with scarlet.
"Nat, I don't want to be the destructive thing he says I am. I think assassinating him now would not be right. It would not be self-defense, because I am safe here with you. He is absolutely horrible, but I...I feel like killing him is what he would do in my place, so it...must be wrong." Wanda pulled her magic back and wrapped her arms around her middle again, just staring down at the muddy grass. I sound ridiculous. "I'm sorry. I don't know what is wrong with me." She felt warm arms wrapped around her in a comforting hug even as she shivered uncomfortably.
Natasha didn't say anything right away, just kept Wanda folded protectively in her arms. That was that; Wanda said she did not want to eliminate Ross, so they were not going to eliminate Ross. "You'll defend yourself if necessary though, yes?" she asked carefully.
Wanda nodded. I will never go back to that prison if I can help it. Never, ever. “I know I'm not strong enough to go running yet, but I like walking outside with you. It helps me forget, at least for a little while."
"I can understand that. Why don't you find out if your eccentric synthezoid friend can come see you too?"
This made Wanda stifle laughter as they kept walking. "Vis actually already asked if he could come visit. I told him I had to ask you first. Yelena isn't my secret to share."
"While I appreciate that, I am not keeping you from seeing your friend. He hasn't turned us in; he can keep his mouth shut about my having a sister too. Just specifically tell him not to say anything about her so he knows not to." Natasha was glad to see Wanda's happy expression again. She seemed at ease again now, and wasn't stumbling like she had at several points on the trek here when she grew too tired.
"Okay. I will tell him he can come anytime he can get away safely then."
________________
That night, Wanda woke up in bed shaking and crying, little red wisps of magic seeping from her around the room, something she hadn't done by accident in quite awhile. Pietro isn't here, he isn't alive, but he isn't trapped in the Raft being hurt, either, she reminded herself, burying her face in the pillows. Why did that feel so real?
The dream-Wanda had exploded in pain, shattering the cell block walls and killing all of the guards in the block. Wanda squeezed her eyes shut and scrunched herself into a smaller ball, hugging her bad arm to her chest. Pietro, help me. I can't go wake up Nat just because I had a horrible dream.
Go get her, Wanda. She won't mind. Get help, it's okay.
Is it? I am not five.
You think your friend never has nightmares? She'll understand. I'm not there. But you aren't alone, either. Wanda slowly started to climb out of bed, and then the next thing she knew, something had slammed her to the carpeted floor with a muffled thump, pinning both hands over her head and something choking her...then a punch.
Wanda yelped and reacted on instinct, feet kicking desperately and then scarlet pouring from her pinned hands, eyes glowing red. In a second she and the mysterious assailant had traded places, Wanda sitting on the culprit's stomach, her good hand holding them down with her powers. Moonlight shone through the window and her expression scrunched in confusion. "...Antonia? Why did you..." she trailed off.
"Oh my god. Oh god, what did I do."
Wanda gingerly scrambled away from the other girl, though she kept her good hand out in defense mode, her heart still racing. Antonia looked terrified herself, and Wanda wondered if she had scared her and that was what caused the sudden assault. She didn't say anything, just stared and tried to keep herself from reacting further.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Antonia whispered. "I didn't...I don't know what happened."
Wanda still didn't say anything, but she nodded. She could understand lashing out in fear; goodness knew she had done that often enough herself. I still want Nat. Well, at least there is one good thing. Maybe Antonia hurt me, but I don't feel so...stuck in that horrible dream anymore. Wanda finally let her magic vanish and held her injured arm against her body protectively. Antonia had probably made it worse yanking it around like she had, but Wanda decided not to say anything about it. It had felt much worse before, anyway. She could always ask Natasha for help in the morning and then Antonia, who already looked guilty, wouldn't feel any worse.
Antonia fumbled to turn on the knocked-over lamp and padded to the door after studying Wanda for a moment. "I am getting an ice pack from the kitchen. Sorry I hit you."
Wanda nodded again; her eye hurt where Antonia had landed her punch, but after the Raft, she didn't care much. Antonia did not hate her, and there was a big difference between being involved in a short fight where she could defend herself easily, and being repeatedly beat up over and over while restrained and told horrible things. She curled back up in bed holding her arm. I'm fine. I do not need to go bother Nat. I won't.
When Antonia returned, she handed Wanda the ice pack before turning out the light and climbing back on her own bed. "You didn't hurt me even after I hurt you," she said into the darkness.
"Good," Wanda replied instantly. "I don't want to hurt you. Did...you have a nightmare too?" I think she did. I think she reacted on defense because something scared her too and I made noise starting to get up.
"Yeah. I don't want to talk about that."
"Okay."
”If we weren't stuck in this world with heroes and villains and not knowing which we are, what job would you want?" Antonia asked suddenly.
Wanda smiled into the dark room, trying to settle her injured arm differently so it would stop paining her. Maybe Antonia doesn't have weird magic like me, but I think she feels just like me. Not knowing where she fits. “I don't know. Maybe something with fashion design, I guess."
”That sounds like you. I know what I want. I want to be a therapist to help other young women like us. Maybe I don't know who I am, but I know what I want to do, and it isn't fighting anymore. Lerato thinks I should try."
”You should. You are very easy to talk to." Wanda could tell Antonia really, really liked this other girl Lerato and decided she hoped Antonia could have what she wanted. If she told Vision something she wanted to do that was important to her like that, she was sure he would tell her she should try, too.
"I guess you should know, since you don't talk much," Antonia teased.
”I have burns on my neck. That isn't my fault," Wanda deadpanned.
”Идиот, so do I. That's not preventing you from talking anymore. Such lies."
This inexplicably sent them both into fits of irrational giggles, which abruptly ceased when they heard a disgruntled voice out in the hall. "Girls, what are you doing in there? Be quiet," Alexei scolded. "The other girls are asleep. Go to sleep."
"He hears us laughing and not us fighting?" Antonia muttered.
"You realize I could make you hop around on one foot while singing nursery rhymes if I wanted to," Wanda called through the door, not feeling at all guilty for saying that to Alexei, who she still did not care for one bit.
Alexei pretended to be offended, but Wanda could hear amusement in his voice as he told them to be quiet and failed to stifle laughter as he walked away.
"Good night, Antonia," Wanda whispered. I can try to sleep again now, at least.
Notes:
Antonia gets so little attention as “herself” in canon and it’s fun giving her a bit of love here. Plus, let’s be real, being around Wanda, who is not a Widow, is good for her; and likewise I think it’s good for Wanda to be able to interact with Antonia too lol. Well, aside from the nightmare incident where they both freaked out.
Vision will make a reappearance next chapter!:)
Any feedback is much appreciated! <3
Chapter 22: Chapter 22
Summary:
In which Wanda and Nat spend some time with Nat’s mixed-up family, and Vision is able to come visit for a bit.
Notes:
I will leave a TW for Yelena briefly mentioning previous SA that occurred in the Red Room.
Thank you for being patient with my late updates! I hope you enjoy:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
In the morning, Natasha immediately pulled Wanda aside when she saw her. "Is this what Alexei meant by saying you and Antonia were making noise last night? All I heard was you two laughing."
"Please don't be upset with her, Nat," Wanda said quickly. "It wasn't either of our faults, really. Both of us had a nightmare. I started to get up to find you, and I guess I made noise. Antonia was scared herself, so she attacked me. I got her off easily, just not...quickly enough. Then we talked a bit after we calmed down. That is probably when you heard us laughing." She knew there was a dark bruise on her face already; she'd seen it in the bathroom mirror and did not care. The ones from the Raft had faded. Those she had hated. Antonia hitting her was like getting bruises or scrapes from training back at the Compound, which never bothered her.
"I don't care too much that you two were tussling and you ended up with a minor black eye, Wanda. That isn't...fine, of course, but I know that is nothing to be concerned over. I'm worried about your arm." Nat thought her friend was carrying herself a bit strangely, even though Wanda clearly seemed okay emotionally this morning despite whatever bad dream she'd had.
Wanda decided not to say that she herself had already been worried enough that she'd planned to ask Nat to check her arm for her after breakfast, because then Natasha would be more concerned than she already was.
"You are going to let Melina do an MRI and an x-ray right now. She has machines for her pigs, like I suspected she did," Nat told her, taking Wanda by her good arm and pulling her along firmly. "I suppose technically we shouldn't use that, but of all the laws our group has technically broken, I certainly don't care about that one."
Melina predictably had no issue checking Wanda's arm instead of one of her pigs, and left Alexei and an annoyed Yelena and Antonia to make breakfast. "She has stretched ligament- here in elbow. Hairline fracture mostly healed, also," Melina told Nat, pointing at the images. She glanced at Wanda curiously. "You heal quickly?"
"I...don't know how. Sometimes it definitely does quicker than normal and other times I feel like it takes forever," Wanda said quietly.
"Well. Antonia might have made it bit worse, whatever you two were doing, but looks to be healing safely." Melina patted Wanda's shoulder and looked to Natasha. "You took good care of friend. She will be just fine. Whatever you are doing for her, continue it."
Wanda thought Nat seemed to suddenly relax, as if some big concern had lifted from her. Melina pointed out that she was not a doctor, especially not for enhanced humans, but that she thought it would be safe to remove the adjustable splint for good in another week or so, and just wrap the sore elbow in an elastic bandage instead. Natasha hugged Wanda close, thoroughly relieved. "Nat, I told you I am fine," Wanda protested, but her friend was not having it.
Nat was all too familiar with Wanda constantly claiming she was fine when she was not, so actually being able to get Wanda's arm checked somewhat properly finally was very helpful. "Thank you for doing this, Melina. Can't take Wanda to any hospital-"
"Thank goodness," said Wanda.
"-so we have been stuck trying to make sure she's healing properly without that," Natasha finished, ignoring Wanda's comment entirely.
"Of course. She would make good Widow, like you were, if she beat Tas- Antonia easily."
Wanda felt Nat's arms tighten around her at Melina's comment and instantly knew Natasha was upset but wouldn't say so. Instead of saying anything, she hugged her friend herself. I think Melina is hurt in her head too. I don't want to be mean to her. Why does she love Alexei? I can tell she does. Easily. She wondered if Alexei cared as much about Melina as Melina did about him, and decided she wanted to find out somehow.
"Thank goodness Wanda was never in that place," Natasha said in a neutral voice. "Melina, I do not want to hear anything like that again. None of us should have ever been there at all."
Melina sounded subdued when she spoke again. "Only mean compliment to her fighting skills, nothing more. You fought Antonia when she was still brainwashed into Taskmaster. You know she's skilled. If your friend easily beat her even injured, then she is very good."
Much to Wanda's surprise, Natasha laughed, still hugging Wanda close. "That, is just how powerful her enhancements are. Surely you've seen videos of Wanda fighting on missions. Very, very sloppy if she's not using her magic," Nat said, only half teasing. "You are much better now than you were last year though," she told Wanda, who was entirely unbothered by this, because it was true.
"Take friend for short walk before breakfast. Please. She does not need to be around Alexei more than necessary right now."
Wanda stifled laughter at that. "Melina, why do you still love him?" she whispered.
"...What?" Melina looked more than a little taken aback by that question, but not offended either. "What has made you ask such a thing?"
"Because I think he does not deserve to have you."
"You have no idea what things I have done. Do not assume I am innocent and make Alexei only guilty one." Melina's voice was scolding but not harsh.
Wanda considered this briefly and then just said, "I know. You hurt Nat and Yelena too. But Alexei chose to be involved, knowingly. He wasn't even ignorant about what it was he was involved with, like me and Pietro were when we volunteered for Hydra. I...I'm sorry. I guess I shouldn't say that..." Wanda's voice trailed off.
But Melina was smiling at her, eyes twinkling. "So you admit you are not entirely to blame for own mistakes. That you are better person than ridiculous Alexei."
Wanda was stunned into silence, and she could tell Nat was trying not to laugh, even as she squeezed Wanda closer. "I didn't mean-"
"Yes. You did," Melina interrupted, not looking at all offended or surprised, and still smiling at her. "Good on you. I agree. Alexei not deserve anything from me, but I will love him as well as I know how anyway. You pick on him as you please. He is...what is phrase? Jerk with heart of gold. Probably major understatement, but...I will care about him anyway. I do not expect any you girls to like him." Then she left, saying they should come inside in a few minutes.
Wanda let Nat take her back outside, still feeling puzzled at Melina's behavior. "Melina is confusing," she said now.
"She's complicated. She said she 'always found it best not to look into the past', but she has a photo album of those three years of us undercover being a fake, normal family in Ohio. Thinks she doesn't have a heart herself, but she loves Alexei to bits despite everything." Natasha looked vulnerable in a way that made Wanda nervous, because her friend always seemed so confident in herself and who she was.
"Nat, you are sad. Can I help somehow?" Wanda asked. I can feel it. I sense it and I can see it on her face.
"Yes. Take care of yourself and never let anyone take your heart away from you. You are good enough just the way you are. Don't you forget it."
"I want to help you. I feel...I feel like coming here hurt you, even though you wanted to come." Wanda hesitated, looking up at the fluffy gray clouds. "I like your family, except Alexei. I'm sorry I have not been here for you properly. You have been spending so much energy helping me for weeks and I have not...done much for you." Did I say that right? I don't want her to think her taking care of me made me upset, either. “I feel better, so I feel like I am noticing things about my friends more easily, that's all."
"Friendship isn't a transaction. I enjoy having you around just...existing and being you. You don't have to do anything, Wanda. I'm glad you are feeling better though." Nat nudged Wanda's shoulder and kept walking.
Wanda looked down at her own sore arm as the two of them walked further away from Melina's house rather than heading back inside. I feel like Nat helps hold me together, same as that splint helping my arm heal. “You aren't Pietro, but you make me feel safer, like he used to," she whispered. "I don't...know how to do that for someone else. I know you don't need me, but I still know you are sad and I don't know how to help."
Natasha stopped short and spun around, putting both hands on Wanda's shoulders. "I just told you. Stop treating yourself like you are worth nothing outside of being the squishy powerhouse of our team. You know how to comfort others. How many times have we been on a mission and you ended up helping scared unfortunate civilians caught in the crossfire? Or the few times we ran into a lost child somewhere and you were able to help them calm down?"
"Okay, then I will do this." Wanda hugged her friend as tightly as she could. "If you aren't...okay, you would tell me, right?"
"Honestly? Probably not, unless you asked." Natasha felt Wanda tense and shook her head, squeezing Wanda's shoulder lightly. "You'd know, Wanda. I know you would. Really, just focus on yourself right now. You want to know what is bothering me? You and Antonia being hurt and being partially responsible for it. Not tracking Yelena down years ago. Being here."
"I think Antonia and I are okay. We don't blame you one bit," Wanda said quietly. "Maybe you should have looked for Yelena years ago, but she's here with you now. You should go back and spend time with her instead." She paused, suppressing a shiver and wishing she had brought a hoodie outside with her. "And if you don't want to be here anymore, I will get my things and we can leave. I trust you."
__________________
Breakfast was awkward and tense, like the meal yesterday, but this time when Alexei continued talking and wouldn't be quiet, Wanda simply stood up calmly, excused herself without waiting for a response, and picked up a piece of buttered toast to take back to the room she was sharing with Antonia. I can tell he thinks he's helping. I think he is genuinely concerned, but he makes me so annoyed and anxious.
"Can she do that?" she heard a surprised Antonia ask.
Then in a pleased tone from Yelena, "See, she does not want to hear Red Guardian stories either."
"Ah, sit down, little wisp," Alexei said firmly, gesturing for her to sit down.
Wanda looked down at the toast in her hand, to Nat, and then straight at Alexei. "No," she stated, "your pushy comments are stressing me out. I do not like it." Then she met Melina's dancing eyes and added, "Thank you for the breakfast. I will help clean up the kitchen if you come tell me when." She did not relax until she was back in the bedroom with the door closed. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. No, I'm sure Nat would say speaking up for myself politely was okay.
She ate the toast and decided to do some small amount of exercise on her own. A mere three sit-ups made her not-quite-healed sore ribs protest badly, so she promptly stopped doing those, but she was able to stretch a bit and do some quiet practice levitating items around the room and setting them down gently one at a time easily. Wanda could sense her magic still wasn't quite back to normal, still nervous and questioning is this really okay now?, but it felt leaps and bounds better than the awful smothered feeling from before that then caused her pain when she tried to use too much of it.
A short text from Vision made her smile; he said he hoped to arrive at around noon her time, and he was bringing her a small surprise from back at the Compound. Wanda texted back, 'I am excited to see you again. Thank you for coming. I think Antonia would like to meet you. She is a new friend, I think.'
Almost immediately she received a reply. 'If you trust her, I will do the same. I will see you soon.'
Wanda quickly answered the door when Melina knocked a few minutes later. "Time to clean up now?"
Melina smiled and nodded. "Yes. Yelena will help you. I have sent Natasha and Antonia outdoors. Those need to talk also. I will go feed pigs with Alexei. He will not bother you."
Melina is kindly manipulating all of us to make all of us...feel better, Wanda realized. Melina had separated their mixed-up group intentionally into the pairs she wanted to get along better, and she had removed obnoxious Alexei from being present entirely. "Okay. Are Yelena and I supposed to make lunch?" Wanda asked.
"No, we'll microwave something later. Just clean up. Then you girls talk or watch movie in living room or something."
Wanda followed Melina to the kitchen, though one thought suddenly struck her. "What happens if someone comes here from St. Petersburg?"
Melina shook her head. "Do not worry. We will be alerted if anyone comes near property. You and Natasha will hide in hidden weapons room and we will either snipe intruder or chase them off."
"Yeah, she nearly shot us when we first came before," Yelena deadpanned from the kitchen, and showed Wanda the small concealed weapons room behind a benign-looking shelf. "Anyway. You and Natasha will go in here if anything shows up on security system. Though, why can't you just make them leave?" Yelena gazed at Wanda steadily.
"Melina, my little fox, where are you?" Alexei's voice boomed from somewhere near the front door. "My namesake awaits."
Wanda found this funny, especially when Melina actually answered him and Yelena rolled her eyes. Melina left the two girls in the kitchen, and they heard the former Widow and the Red Guardian go outside. The girls quickly began clearing the breakfast table, and Wanda knew Yelena was still waiting for her to answer. "I can't use more mind tricks again," she said finally. "I won't, not unless they are going to hurt us and there is absolutely no choice."
Yelena tensed, though Wanda's reaction actually made her much more comfortable around Wanda rather than less. "Are you reading me right now?" Yelena asked quietly.
"Not...like that." Wanda set the plate she was holding into Melina's dishwasher and put her hand to her head. "Sometimes I sense surface emotions passively without trying to. Some people's heads are...louder than others," she tried to explain. Please don't hate me. Please. I'm trying to be honest.
"What does that mean?" Wanda was relieved Yelena's question just sounded curious, not frightened or judging.
Wanda stared out the window, mentally searching for the right words. I should just do my best. "You know how you can sometimes just immediately read a person without them doing or saying anything, whether it's their body language or expression or whatever? And other people, you can't read instinctively in an instant at all? Like that, but...multiplied. I'm not sure how to explain..."
"Oh. I guess that makes sense." Yelena had not had good experiences with weird mind-altering things, but somehow the idea of Wanda did not bother her, at least not if the owner was the Sokovian girl next to her. Wanda might be quiet and too clingy, but she seemed an honest person she could trust not to abuse that weird power set of hers. "So, what am I?"
"Your mind is really loud, so I feel like your emotions are screaming at me. Your natural aura is bright and colorful. Right now, curiosity, jealousy, love, annoyance, concern. I do not get any specific thoughts without purposely poking, which I won't do though," Wanda said quickly, not wanting Yelena to feel she had no privacy with her mere presence. "I can't just...turn the telepathy off entirely. I'm sorry."
"What about Natasha?"
"She is quiet, in her head. But she...melds with my feelings often and I am around her all the time, so she's easy to feel passively too, now. Nat's aura feels more subdued. Like...like I'm a rainy dark gray sky and she is the small pastel rainbow chasing the bad dark away and letting the pleasant kind stay."
"You sound like a fortune teller," Yelena teased, but she could tell Wanda was scared of being pushed away herself, which seemed odd considering Wanda could literally force others to like her if she wanted to. To Yelena, that did the opposite, because that meant Wanda would not make her feel anything that wasn't truly hers. "Hey, you could make lots of money doing that. You'd never be wrong."
Wanda relaxed and stifled laughter. "Thank you for not hating me for that," she said softly. "It...means a lot to me."
Yelena's eyes narrowed, scowling as she spat, "That would be asshole thing to do. I snooped. I saw bit of video on Natasha's laptop."
What? Thoroughly disturbed by this, a mug fell from Wanda's hand and shattered on the floor before she could react to use her magic to catch it. "You watched that...Raft footage?" she whispered.
"Only part of it," Yelena said calmly, pushing Wanda aside to start sweeping up the mess, "and it pissed me off, okay? Why the hell did you tell me yesterday you felt you had no right being traumatized from that?"
Wanda wondered if Nat knew her sister had decided to snoop on her laptop, but suspected she probably did. "That's not what I said. I said it wasn't like what you and the other Widows went through."
"Um, different, sure. But if I think it means, 'Would you rather be slapped on right cheek or left cheek?'" Yelena finally switched to Russian, remembering that Wanda did seem to speak it fluently, "You aren't being fair to any of us, discarding your own pain and propping ours up. We were all victims of the same sort of system, and you know it. Broke the rules, made a mistake, can't be controlled? Time to break you. Then if you don't break, don't do what they want, they hate you more."
Wanda did not answer, and when she tried to help clean up the mess she had made, Yelena grabbed her and shoved her against the refrigerator. What did I say wrong? Yelena looks...upset. I don't think it's all me, either.
"Natasha tried to defend me and she kept us together as long as she could when they dragged us back to the Red Room after Ohio. I didn't know what was going on back then. Then I lost her anyway. I think you are full of some guilt complex just like her. You are both stupid, except you are more stupid, because she definitely could have tried to find me." Yelena's expression looked so crumpled that Wanda instinctively tried to hug her. Yelena tensed and muttered, "Why are you hugging me?"
I don't know. It usually helps me, but... Wanda immediately released Yelena, because it struck her that maybe Yelena simply didn't Wanda hugging her. Understanding and connecting over hurt feelings did not mean Yelena would be comfortable with a hug, especially not from her. "I'm sorry."
"You're fine. It was just weird. You can hug if you want; you don't scare me." Yelena was certain she would probably end up being hugged all the time now, from the way she had seen Wanda hug Natasha, but that was okay.
They finished cleaning up the kitchen quickly in a pleasant silence. Wanda knew Melina hadn't meant for them to work together and not talk at all, but Wanda liked being together without talking. Once the kitchen was reorganized, she followed Yelena into the living room. "Vision is supposed to be here in a bit," Wanda ventured. Since Nat had told her that she'd tell Melina about him, Wanda hadn't bothered bringing him up to her, but she wasn't sure if Yelena knew or not. This seemed like something reasonable she should make sure Yelena knew about.
Yelena flopped on the sofa, but left room for Wanda to sit too, tossing a pillow at her. "Here. You are standing weird, so I can tell your arm hurts. Why is your robot boyfriend willing to keep you secret but not stay with you? Rude men."
He's not a robot, Wanda thought. She curled up in the other corner of the couch with the pillow and studied her nails. Maybe she could paint them again; that would be nice. "Because I told him not to," she said quietly. "Vis can still help other people easily without dealing with staying hidden. He did sign the Accords, but he wants to attempt altering them too. If he did stay with me, he will have to be on the run too."
"He can help with those things as a fugitive, same as you and Natasha. She said you all just haven't yet because your team is waiting for you to heal completely."
Wanda glanced down at her arm and stretched her legs out a bit. I feel so, so much better than before, and I'm still nowhere near fully back to normal. "If someone somehow caught Vis on a mission, I'm scared he would get taken apart or something. Sometimes I feel like I am the only one that treats him like...like his own person, and not just some intelligent piece of tech Tony made." She could tell Yelena was dubious about this, but didn't want to hurt her feelings. "You will see when you meet him," Wanda said firmly. "He just looks different, when he isn't in his human disguise."
"You love him," Yelena said bluntly.
"Yes." Wanda didn't offer further explanation, but her happy wistful expression said plenty. I do. I really do.
"But not the same as you do my sister. There will be two of you walking around with your heads in the clouds if Lerato returns today too. God, I think you and Antonia are a couple of hopeless romantics."
Wanda considered claiming otherwise and then decided not to, because technically Yelena was right. While it was hard to have any remote hope that it could ever happen, what she really wanted was somewhere quiet and safe to be able to have a family. She did not care one bit if they were adopted or biologically hers, but she wanted babies. Once upon a time that partner hadn't had a face, but at this point she imagined Vision with her, and the idea made her cheeks turn pink. I can't tell Vis that. I sound ridiculous, and he might not even want any. "Is there anyone you like that way?" Wanda asked finally.
Yelena hesitated, unsure how she should answer that in a way the other girl would understand. "No. I don't have any desire to have that kind of relationship with anyone. I thought it was because of what the Red Room did to all of the Widows, but it isn't. Ugh, look at Melina and Alexei. They are always all over each other. I guess sex would be much better if you weren't forced into it as part of training or a job, but I still don't want it or a romantic relationship for myself, either."
"You don't have to have sex to have romantic interest in someone." Wanda had no real explanation for how she had come up with that belief since it was not something she had researched herself or asked Nat about, but it was something she felt certain of all the same. "And I...I'm sorry that happened to you, Yelena. I don't know details because Nat never really talks about it, but I did know that...that sort of abuse happened to everyone in the Red Room."
Yelena stared at the ceiling and sighed. "Well. Everyone except Antonia. She was just treated like shit in a different way. You don't have to be sorry- it's not your fault. Anyway. What about you and the Vision?"
Wanda considered this, twisting one of her rings around her finger. She won't pick on me for telling the truth. I know that much. “I, um...I guess I would like it eventually, maybe? Definitely not anytime soon. But I don't really...care about that, either. It would just be a nice extra. I would not feel like I was missing anything if Vis never wants to. I'm not sure how to explain, exactly..." she trailed off. Somehow Yelena's question hadn't seemed embarrassing to her, and so she didn't mind answering truthfully.
"No, that makes sense. I don't want it for me, but you explained fine. I think-" Yelena abruptly stopped talking and checked her phone when it beeped, not noticing that the noise had startled Wanda and made her tense, her eyes squeezed shut. "Melina says I need to hide you." In a second she was on her feet, grabbing Wanda by her good arm and dragging her toward the hidden weapons room.
I am safe here. I am not there any longer. The noise is harmless. I need to calm down, Wanda ordered herself. "Nat. What about Nat?" she whispered.
"I don't know, but Melina says keep you safe. So that is what we're doing. I'll find out." Yelena shoved her into the little room and started to close the opening.
"Please don't leave me in here."
Yelena frowned, realizing that something had clearly set Wanda off; she was shaking and had backed into one corner. "Are you claustrophobic or something?"
"I don't...I don't know." Wanda didn't know how to explain that if she'd had warning and not just heard that beeping noise suddenly, it probably would have been fine. I want Nat. Is she okay? Maybe we shouldn't have come here. I'm scared.
Yelena did not know how to deal with Wanda, not when she didn't quite understand what was wrong and she could see Wanda's eyes glowing red. Instinct said that was probably a defensive reaction for Wanda, but it disturbed her even as she decided she would not leave her sister's friend alone. Thinking quickly, she shoved the opening closed, snatched a blanket off the sofa, and yanked the hidden weapons room back open.
There stood Wanda planted in the middle of the tiny room, one of Melina's guns in her good hand while using her injured arm to awkwardly help aim better.
"What the hell, Wanda? I left you for five seconds," Yelena snapped, but that defensive reaction was one she was familiar with, and she held up empty hands in surrender mode. "You know me. This is a safe space. Let me in, please."
Wanda did not relax, but she did put Melina's gun down immediately. I don't know why I did that. Even if it wasn't Yelena, I shouldn't have reacted like that. She was surprised when Yelena came in, closed the opening again, and offered her the blanket. "I'm sorry."
"Don't even start. I have seen that reaction too many times already," Yelena said quietly. "I get it. Not sure why you did that instead of using your enhancements, though. Wouldn't that be easier for you?"
Wanda wrapped herself up in the blanket and stayed close to Yelena. Yelena was not Nat, but she was there, warm and solid, and she was not going to hurt her. She could feel Yelena watching her, and she dipped her head, letting her hair fall across her face. "Is Nat okay?"
"She's fine," Yelena said a bit too quickly. "They probably hid her in the greenhouse or something." Wanda's shaky hand was clutching her arm, and she didn't push Wanda away again. Wait. I think I do know what set her off. “The phone beeping noise. That's what triggered you. Because of that shock collar."
Wanda nodded, knowing Yelena must have put two and two together from whatever she'd seen of that awful Raft footage. I knew I wasn't there, but it was like at the airport and the hotel. I still just...couldn't think straight and grew scared. Yelena's phone went off again, but this time she merely flinched and ignored it otherwise.
Yelena privately decided she would attempt to make the noise a safe sound again for her, because there was no way to prevent it from being heard in public somewhere. "Oh brother. False alarm. Wanda, the intruder at the perimeter is your dumb boyfriend disguised as a normal human!" Yelena scowled, but she let a very relieved Wanda continue holding onto her arm. "Melina didn't recognize him, so she wanted to be safe and hide you."
____________________
Wanda and Yelena headed outside. The rest of the group was already in the yard, and Wanda immediately gave a very surprised Vision a hug. "I'm so glad you're here," she said happily, switching back to English again. "I missed you."
Vision frowned when he saw Wanda's face; that dark bruise around her eye had not been there the last time he had seen her, and the previous bruises on her face from the Raft had healed by now. Clearly this one was fresh. "Are you all right?"
Wanda tilted her head in confusion for a second before realizing what he meant. "Oh, that. Vis, I'm fine. It was an accident," she assured him. Then, in her telepathic voice, "It isn't like those other ones were. This might be a little sore, but it doesn't bother me." Wanda felt Vision's arms tighten protectively around her, and she closed her eyes. ”I am so glad you're here. I know it hasn't been very long, really. I just missed you."
"What are intentions toward my Natasha's friend?" Alexei asked.
"Oh god, here we go," Yelena muttered.
"Alexei, leave them be," Melina scolded. "That is Wanda's business."
Vision gave Wanda a questioning look. Wanda telepathically told him he should ignore Alexei, which he found odd, because Wanda might be a quiet person often, but she didn't like hurting people's feelings, either. "I do not believe Ms. Romanoff is yours," he said firmly. "Did you not leave her since she was a small child?"
"Vision, just go inside with Wanda," Nat interrupted before that line of conversation could go any further. "She can show you her room she's sharing with Antonia."
"Cannot have boy in room-"
"Alexei, with all due respect, be quiet. I know you are trying to help, but Wanda is not your daughter. She's nineteen. Leave her alone. You have no right to tell her she can't have someone in her room." Natasha looked more than a little angry, and then she added, "The only person Wanda would need to ask is Antonia since she's the one sharing that room with her."
"And I do not care," Antonia said, looking straight at Wanda.
Wanda did not want to cause a fuss, even if she didn't like Alexei much, and she rather felt caught in the middle. It's Melina's house. Shouldn't I just ask her? She met Melina's gaze and the older ex-Widow simply smiled at her and nodded. Taking this as the official okay, Wanda took Vision's hand and led him inside. "I'm not sure anyone told Alexei you were coming. I'm sorry."
"I suspect he would have said the same even if he knew. The first thing he said was that the Red Guardian would rip me to pieces if I meant any of you harm or leaked your location." Vision found the whole situation a bit off-putting, but if Wanda felt safe here, then he would deal with it. She seemed mostly happy, aside from the stab of annoyance he knew she felt towards eccentric Alexei. The bedroom Wanda showed him was on the small side, but cozy. "You and Miss Dreykov are sharing this room, correct?"
Wanda nodded. "You should just call her Antonia, Vis. She doesn't like being associated with her father. I wouldn't either." She settled herself in the corner closest to the wall on her bed and patted the comforter next to her. "Will you just...sit with me like back at the New York vacation house? Please?"
"As long as you feel safe doing that."
"I do." Wanda stayed quiet after that, but she relaxed further, happy with Vision's arm around her shoulders.
Vision pulled something out of the briefcase he had brought with him and set it on Wanda's lap. "I remembered how much you loved that picture book, so I brought it for you. I am sorry I didn't bring it to you before."
My Ugly Duckling book Nat bought me! Wanda grabbed the book and hugged it to her chest. "Thank you so much. I was thinking about asking if you could bring this the next time you came. I don't usually care much about just...stuff, but that family photo, this book, and my rings I do." She flipped to the title page where Natasha had just written, For Wanda. From your friend, Nat. "You and Nat never made a big deal that I couldn't read English well last year, either. I tried to hide it and she figured it out. It made me feel...stupid, but she just acted like it didn't matter." Wanda smiled and rested her head against Vision's warm shoulder. And then Nat took me to the bookstore and made me pick multiple books out.
"Wanda, I know she has told you this many times already. You are not stupid. You know multiple languages, and you were not even provided access to any sort of official education since you were small. That is not your fault." Vision knew this was a sore spot for Wanda, especially with Tony the genius around, which he rather thought was probably part of why Wanda did not like him very much. Wanda had told him why she loved that book so much, being an English copy of one she'd had in Sokovia as a child.
Wanda did not answer that directly, and just settled herself closer. Vision did not touch her hair, but he tucked her head under his chin and held her, keeping one of her shaky hands clasped in his own. I feel...secure here. I have Vis holding me and Nat is here and... Wanda realized that even Alexei, who admittedly annoyed and stressed her out, was another person willing to defend Nat and her, even if it was probably mostly because he liked fighting and making up more Red Guardian stories. "Did you get any updates from Clint or Scott?"
"They are both safe at their homes. It will be difficult to transfer messages to your rogue team from them easily for awhile. I believe it will be best for all of us not to do so currently, not with Ross keeping such a close eye on their houses. He seems to believe the rest of you will attempt joining them, so we decided to simply let him think that." Vision sounded disgusted, which was funny to Wanda coming from him. "Wanda, you feel so much better. I am glad."
"Is it that obvious?" Wanda asked, only half joking.
"Yes. I can sense you here," Vision said as he touched Wanda's forehead gently, careful not to mess with her loose hair. "Moreover, I do not like that you were hurt again, but you did not start apologizing for the way you look, either."
Wanda closed her eyes and held onto Vision's arm tightly, her book set aside for the moment. ”Vis, that's...different to me. It isn't from a memory that hurts to remember and then reminds me of it every time I see it," she told him mentally. "Antonia does not hate me. She was not spitting horrible things at me and hurting me on purpose, enjoying it. She just had a nightmare, just like me, and was scared because she had heard a noise when I started to get up." Wanda's hand flitted to the marks still left on her neck. "I hate this. I hated seeing all of the smaller injuries from the Raft before they faded. I don't care that Antonia accidentally gave me a black eye."
Vision mulled this information over briefly, and then nodded. He did not want to see Wanda hurt, period, but he could understand the difference to her. Wanda's neck really did look much better, and while seeing the damaged skin still made him angry, he was pleased Wanda felt okay enough to let it show all the same. She was not tense anymore, and she had drooped further against him, her splinted arm tucked between them. Vision worried she might be putting too much pressure on it, but she seemed content and he did not want to move her. "Mr. Stark contacted Thor, by the way."
"...Really? Why?" And how? I thought he left Earth entirely. Wanda found it amusing that Thor of all people had made Vision call him just Thor, but she remembered the big Asgardian specifically ordering him to do so a day or two after Ultron, before Thor had left. Thor did not want to be called 'Mr. Odinson'.
"Originally, he was hoping Thor would help alter the Accords, but he was unhelpful. He said he planned to simply ignore them. He is...vacationing in Australia and does not care a whit about the Accords' existence, though he did mention that he believed his roommate would not mind if any of the rogue Avengers paid a visit."
Wanda was very unsurprised. Unlike her, Thor was not a glass cannon, and he was Asgardian royalty, not a Sokovian refugee. He had no reason to let himself be affected by the Accords' existence. "Why would he pay attention to the Accords? Thor could literally just leave the planet if he's pushed too far. They shouldn't apply to him anyway, since he isn't even from our planet."
"They are still law here," Vision said reluctantly. "I...cannot process simply ignoring it so easily."
"Vis, you are breaking the law by being here with me," Wanda reminded him, her voice so quiet Vision could barely hear her. I don't understand. I think Vis is saying he still feels guilty for it. She did not feel at all guilty for breaking the Accords; they were trash and she fully believed that, regardless of what had happened to her on the Raft one way or the other. She felt guilty for many other things, but not that.
"Yes. I know this is right, but part of my programming still says I am doing wrong. How could it be wrong? The Accords have not protected you or anyone else. The secretary's...fanaticism has even put ordinary humans that are not enhanced in danger, like all of those humans unlawfully detained in the airports. Being capable of mass destruction should not nullify human rights, especially not when that human is you. You did nothing wrong. I wish those like Secretary Ross could know you as I do instead." Vision sounded very upset, and Wanda thought she detected an odd quiver in his voice that she didn't like hearing from him.
"If visiting me is distressing, you don't have to come see me anymore," Wanda assured him. "I...I would miss you very much, but I would understand." I don't deserve him. Pietro would be so mad at me for thinking that. And Vis just told me before that he was happy I felt better. I am still falling apart inside. I'm letting things hurt me that shouldn't. The little frightened, sad parts of her inside twisted in her heart painfully. Maybe it really was her. Vision had just said she could mass destroy things. No. No, that isn't right. Vis wouldn't be holding me if he didn't care. He just knows that about me and he cares anyway.
It struck her that Vision had not, in fact, called her a weapon of mass destruction at all. He had just said that she was capable of mass destruction, which was an immutable fact as much as she hated that, and now he had her small hands clasped in his big ones. She did not try to pull away, and her magic seemed to settle a little, warm bits tingling in her fingertips but content to stay inside otherwise.
"No, no...Wanda, no. It is not you at all," Vision said firmly. "This is something I must deal with. Perhaps these are the conflicting human emotions the rest of you deal with constantly."
This made Wanda smile. "Maybe. I don't know what I can do to help, but I can listen."
"I do not wish to put any further burden on you, however. This, is illogical."
"Vis, you always listen to me. I will always do the same, even if I can't understand," Wanda told him. She touched Vision's cheek reassuringly, wishing her hand wouldn't shake, but he didn't say anything about that. Vision only gave her hand a gentle squeeze and blinked in a contemplative manner.
"Wanda, can your friend speak Russian?" Antonia called from the hall. "Because if he can, I have an idea."
Notes:
Yes, Yelena is aroace. No, it’s not because of her experiences in the Red Room, which I dearly wanted to make explicitly clear even as I felt it would be logical for her to conclude that might be the case before realizing otherwise.
I hope Wanda’s feelings make sense too. I guess my brain has processed her as being demi, I don’t know lol. She wrote her dialogue and said what she wanted to say, and then after the fact when I was editing I realized xD meh. ANYWAYS.
Any feedback is much appreciated<3
Chapter 23: Chapter 23
Summary:
In which Wanda is able to express her wishes for the near future, she spends time with Vision before he leaves, and Alexei provides some unintentional levity.
Notes:
Oh look, a chapter! Finally. Since we have long since caught up to where I had sections prewritten (aside from one future scene it isn’t time for yet), it’s just taking me longer to update, especially since my chaotic writing “schedule” means I like to work on more than one WIP at a time. It helps me produce better writing lol. I am sorry and thank you for sticking with me!
I hope you enjoy:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"I want to go into the city and meet Lerato there. We're going to share a flat and it's almost ready," Antonia explained. "Probably just a few days more. Some of the people in St. Petersburg recognize me already because...you know." She gestured at her burn scars and smiled at Wanda. "Anyways, no one knows I am Dreykov's daughter. We decided to just label me an ex-Widow along with the rest. So if you come with me, they'll just assume you're another ex-Widow too. Lerato wants me to pick up a few more things for our flat. We could meet up and shop for those things."
Wanda frowned, happy that Antonia wanted to invite her to do something, but thinking that sounded far too risky. Before she could answer, Melina shook her head.
"Antonia, you want double date, not shopping trip. Be honest."
Antonia looked a bit sheepish. "Wanda sounds like a native when she speaks Russian. She would blend easily."
"She does. He will not blend with three of you girls, even if he knows Russian. You cannot do that." Melina was firm on this. "Let her spend time with the Vision until he needs to leave. You may take Wanda into the city alone another time."
Antonia was clearly disappointed, but she didn't press the issue since she didn't want to get her new friend in trouble. She rather liked being around Wanda, who fit in with the others perfectly to her, even if she had never been stuck in the Red Room at all, and was brave enough to let her feelings be expressed clearly despite that making it easier for others to hurt her. Antonia suspected this was because of the sort of enhancements the Sokovian girl had, at least partially, but it was something she liked about quiet Wanda anyway. "Well, I'm still going into the city, Wanda. Do you want anything?"
Wanda shook her head. "I think I would like to meet your friend Lerato, but otherwise, no."
"I will invite her back here then."
"The four of you could have a picnic in the yard," Natasha suggested. "That's safe for everyone."
Antonia looked worried now, her hands stuffed firmly in her pockets. "But that is a date thing. Obviously. Lerato might not want to."
"You won't know if you do not ask," Wanda said quietly. "She sounds like a nice person. Even if she doesn't like you the same way back, she'd still be your friend, yes?"
Antonia nodded. "She would. I am sure of it."
________________
Vision kept his arm around Wanda after Antonia left, just holding her protectively close as they stood by the living room window, and was rewarded with a happy smile as she looked up at him. She did not seem to care one bit that Alexei was studying them and obviously displeased, and he let her lead him back outside, saying she wanted to take a walk. After a few minutes' walking away from the house, Vision asked just to clarify, "You are strong enough to do this easily now?"
Wanda nodded. "I made it all the way here with Nat's help. I think I can take a walk for a bit," she deadpanned. It was cooler here than it had been in New York, and Wanda was glad she was wearing her hoodie with the fuzzy lining. "Besides...I know you would take me back to Nat safely if I did collapse," Wanda added, her voice wavering a bit even though she knew she shouldn't feel worried, not even a little bit. I don't want to worry him. Don't sound like that, she ordered herself.
"Wanda, I will carry you straight back to her right now if you need me to. You are safe here," Vision assured her, ceasing walking and just folding her close. "You are safe," he said again, "and I know you can defend yourself. You can make me leave you be if you wish."
This made Wanda smile and shake her head. "I don't want you to leave. I just..." Nat told me I should tell him exactly how I feel. "I do trust you- you would not be touching me right now if not." She switched to her telepathic voice because it was easier. "There is still that little thread worrying because you left me behind in that airport. I understand why you did, and I'm not angry. It just...still makes me anxious, even if I know it's illogical. I am always scared someone will leave me behind. Then you did just that. It was like that fear of mine being made real again."
Vision did not answer right away, knowing that it must have been difficult for her to say that, but unsure how to make her feel better. He had left her behind, and that had directly led to the entire Raft ordeal. Vision thought that he was lucky that Wanda did not want him to go away so she would never have to see him again. But instead she was willing to give him a chance, and she must be feeling better than before simply because she'd been willing to confide those things without being prodded into doing so. "Does not having Ms. Romanoff directly nearby exacerbate this fear?"
"I don't think I know 'exacerbate'."
"Making it worse."
"Oh. I think I did know that word and...forgot the definition. That sounds familiar." Wanda still did not like admitting if there was an English word she didn't know, but she also knew Vision would not mind her asking. At least having to ask was a rare occurrence by now. "Nat is a safe person for me, but I can't keep relying on her so much. It is making it so she feels like she has to stay with me so I can function. That isn't fair to her. She must be so tired."
"You were hurt very badly. Anyone would need support after what happened, Wanda. That is not your fault."
"Whether it's my fault or not, that doesn't mean it's fair to Nat for me to be so dependent on her, either. She didn't come here sooner because of me. She spent every day we were at the vacation house taking care of me. She had to literally babysit me on the trip here because I had trouble in the airport." Wanda's expression screwed up in frustration, and she impulsively threw a bit of scarlet at a large rock by their feet, splitting it in two. I can do that without trying and I still feel scared anyway.
Vision privately thought Wanda was much, much better than she had been before, but he did not think pointing this out when she was already frustrated would help. That was only helpful when Wanda was already mostly content, like she had been while she was nestled next to him as they sat on the bed. "I believe you are stronger than you give yourself credit for," Vision said instead. "You just split a rock in half effortlessly. Do you think those humans that wish to harm you can do that?"
Wanda made a displeased frustrated noise and crossed her arms as well as she could. "No, but those people do not feel so scared so often. Vis, how am I supposed to do my job when I hurt all of those people in Lagos and can't trust myself or...function normally? I like helping people, and Pietro would want me to. I want to protect other children in danger like we used to be. I want to do something, and instead I am just sitting aroun-"
"Recovering. I realize interrupting is rude, but that is just objectively false. Recovering is not just sitting around. Wanda, I am so sorry I left you behind in that airport." Vision sounded so deeply regretful and hurt that Wanda immediately hugged him as tightly as she could. He rubbed her shoulder comfortingly and let her be. "Perhaps a small mission would help you feel better?"
Wanda sounded bitterly amused when she answered, her stance tense as she turned her back and gazed off into the distance. "I can't. Not now. I would be a...liability," she said quietly, pausing to mentally search for the final word.
"Why does it have to be that type of mission? Can you not volunteer at a soup kitchen or an orphanage or something similar?" Vision knew quite well that what Wanda really wanted was simply to be able to help others, especially any lonely children in danger like she and her brother had been. She said she wanted to 'protect children', but he was sure she would also be happy helping them outside of regular Avengers missions.
Wanda's face brightened somewhat at that. She turned so she could see Vision. He was mentally searching online for something, his blue eyes looking a bit faraway. Rather than interrupt him, she remained quiet and just nodded. I really could do that. I am strong enough for that, I think. I just don't want to cause another Lagos, and if I did this instead, it has nothing to do with my powers at all, so they would not be in danger.
"There are many human children at orphanages. You could go to one of those, Wanda," Vision said gently. "Children always like you. I have seen it. You are patient with them, and often elicit smiles. Perhaps you could help educate them. They do not receive enough there."
"...Me? Vis, I can't do that. I don't have enough education to teach someone else. You know that."
"You are wrong." Vision's voice was so matter-of-fact that Wanda just stood staring at him in surprise. "You do not have much accredited education. That does not mean you do not possess the knowledge to help small children learn." He took Wanda's hands and gave her a gentle squeeze. "For example, you calculate simple math quickly for a human."
Because Pietro and I used to add and subtract things all the time because we had no money. “I can't do algebra," Wanda muttered, which bothered her when she saw Tony do that in his head and then attempted to goodnaturedly tease her about it. Nat had told him to shut up and threatened him vaguely, which had made him stop immediately. Tony had never outright apologized, but he did leave some concert tickets on her nightstand. Unlike some of the other things he continued teasing her with, like calling her a green bean, he never teased her about that again. Wanda liked that annoying Tony recognized that the education thing or lack thereof was an off-limits thing to tease her about. "And I was not very good at math in school when I was little before our home was destroyed a-and our parents died."
"Small human children are not going to be learning that. Moreover, you do know how to do the basics. Mr. Rogers showed you. Regardless, you do a lovely job with young children. They would probably help you feel better also."
Wanda didn't answer that, but she melted internally at the feather-light touch on her temple as Vision kissed her. "You didn't ask first this time. Thank you for trusting that I wouldn't mind since I said I wouldn't," she told him. Little Lila's innocent prince and princess comments inexplicably flitted through her head, and she found herself smiling. Vis did treat her like a princess. Maybe she didn't feel or look like one, but he did not seem to mind.
"I still wish you to inform me should you ever change your mind," Vision told her.
"I will."
_______________
When they returned to the house, Yelena watched her curiously. "He is red," she told Wanda unnecessarily.
Wanda's expression screwed up in annoyance. "And? That is what Vis naturally looks like." She squeezed Vision's hand, not wanting him to feel out of place too, but she could tell he did not mind Yelena's comment since it was a simple fact and nothing more.
"I know. He just looks different in person than I expected." Yelena still sounded curious and found that she could easily see why her sister's friend liked Vision so much as she watched them. Vision looked at Wanda like she was the only thing in the room. He gave her a hug and kissed her hands, which made Wanda's big green eyes light up. He perched next to her on the sofa and then began eyeing Alexei suspiciously, a protective arm wrapped around Wanda. Yelena decided quiet Wanda must have good taste in boyfriends, even if this one looked funny, if he did not approve of Alexei. "See, you should take lessons and treat Melina better," Yelena deadpanned.
Alexei looked genuinely baffled. "Yelena, whatever do you mean?"
"You take Melina for granted," Yelena told him, and got up to stalk out of the room.
_______________
Wanda retreated back to the room she was sharing with Antonia, mostly just wanting peace and quiet. "Vis, can you sense whatever is still wrong with me? My magic, I mean?" she asked. "I want to ask Nat if we can do one of the ideas you gave me instead for awhile, because I don't...feel confident returning to real missions." I don't want to admit that even to myself, but it's the truth. Steve and Sam will be disappointed in me, but if I can still help, to just do something else...I could be content with that. “But I still...need to make it go completely back to normal again anyway."
Vision tilted his head thoughtfully. "There is nothing wrong with you," he stated after a moment.
"I am not looking for reassurance emotionally," Wanda whispered. "I know you don't mind...me. That isn't what I mean."
"But, Wanda, there is nothing truly 'wrong' with your magic," Vision told her. "I may not know much about your enhancements myself, but this I know. You feel like something is wrong with it because you are hurting, and it is directly linked to the rest of you, especially your feelings. It will heal along with the rest of you. Does it not feel much better to you than before already?"
It does. I suppose I knew that. Wanda nodded and held out a bit of scarlet twisting around her fingers. Vision and Nat just saw it as part of her, but they had never known her before the Hydra experiments. What would her parents think if they could see her now? They wouldn't care, Wanda. They would be startled but love us like always, enhancements or no enhancements. You know that. A sudden memory of Pietro trying to make her feel better by teasing her startled Wanda and made her tense. It had been right after the initial experiments, when she was terrified and half crazed, staying huddled in a corner of the little cell and screaming that she wished everyone's heads would be quiet. Someone injected some sort of sedative into the IV port in her hand and some defensive instinct sent the man flying against the wall in a haze of crackling red. She did not know what happened to that man afterward, because she didn't see him for months and then when she did, he left her alone, had a limp, and tried to convince Strücker to get rid of her.
Pietro had been scared too, but she could feel him in the adjoining cell, not just because he was slamming into the walls, but his thoughts. He wished she was at least trapped in the same room so they could be together, he wanted to get to her, he wanted to kill whoever was hurting her. And then I wonder if she can hear me too? If you can hear this, Wanda, can you try to talk back? Because then they can't really separate us no matter what.
That was the first conscious thing she had done with her new abilities...just talk to her precious twin. It felt so natural and instinctive, and it was easy and it helped make everything 'quieter' for her. ”Pietro? Can you hear me?"
”Of course I can! I'm so glad, Wanda." Pietro had managed to help her calm down despite the fact he still couldn't control his own speedster abilities yet, and he had teased her saying, "Silly, you've always had an extra sense about things. Now you have real magic. Maybe the creepy stone just amplified...well, you. You could be a Sokovian fortune teller at Halloween for real, like Mama told us stories about." He had sounded so entertained by this that she had finally been able to calm down.
Blocks. Focusing on the wooden blocks. Test drug things burning under her skin and itchy things wrapped around her hand that she wasn't allowed to remove. Someone saying she had pretty eyes and it wasn't a compliment so she let them glow red and scared the person away from her.
You were nothing. Strücker made you useful, if you could just control yourself, you damn thing.
Halt die Klappe, du verdammte Schlampe.
She shivered.
"-da. Wanda, please. Please listen. You are safe."
Wanda knew that voice. She had been talking to Vision and then just...grew lost in old memories. Why was she thinking about that now? That was not the Raft. That was not the Raft at all. Vision did not look at her like that; he did not treat her like some inhuman thing only valuable for what she might be able to do. Wanda blinked, struggling to focus. I am in Russia, in Melina's house, and I have friends with me. Vision is hugging me. “Pietro heard those things and he would yell in German at them right back," Wanda blurted.
Vision didn't know exactly what Wanda was talking about, but he knew enough to conclude that she was referring to something that happened before with Hydra and that it bothered her. So instead of pressing for answers, he just held her closer and asked if she wanted him to find Natasha.
Wanda shook her head, but she buried her face in Vision's chest and wouldn't move. "I'm okay now. I was just thinking and I am not sure what happened. I don't think I want to talk about it right now," she told him mentally. Much to her relief, Vision didn't seem to mind at all, though he did ask if it was all right to pick her up. This seemed okay, so she nodded. Wanda knew she was practically nothing for Vision to hold, but she was still surprised when he carried her to the window and simply stood there holding her. "Vis, your phone is ringing," Wanda said reluctantly.
"I do not care to answer it at the moment."
"It might be important."
Vision wavered for a second, but then shook his head adamantly. "No. You are more important. I will not move you on my responsibility list. I left you in Leipzig when you wanted me to check on Mr. Rhodes. I will not listen to you on such matters again. You do not care for yourself enough." He did gently set Wanda back on her feet, but he took her hands and smiled at her instead. "If you want me to leave, I will. If you prefer not to be touched, I will not. But I will not move you and your safety down on my responsibility list."
Wanda didn't really understand what picking up the phone had to do with that (did he think checking it meant he would be ignoring her?), but she didn't press him further. "Is Rhodey okay now?" she asked, glancing at the splint bracing her arm. She didn't know Rhodey well, really, but she also knew quite well why Vision had accidentally hit him back in that airport.
She had distracted him. Vision had seen her hurt and he was distracted and angry.
Vision mulled this over before answering, and he was surprised when Wanda curled back up on the bed but then asked him if he minded doing the same. Feeling a bit awkward, Vision did lay down beside her, but the bed was not really big enough for two to stretch out on it fully, and he felt like he was squishing Wanda. "Wanda, you are okay with this? I am invading your personal space. I do not wish you to feel claustrophobic."
Wanda flinched, but she squeezed her eyes shut for a minute and nodded. "Vis, this isn't the same as being trapped in that place or back with Hydra or under the bed with Pietro when I was little. I like being close. It...helps. And I'm still waiting to hear if Rhodey is okay," she finished aloud.
"He is still learning how to use the leg braces Mr. Stark designed for him, but he is recovering. I am uncertain if he will physically heal completely, but he is safe and much, much improved." Vision decided he would just trust Wanda to say if she was no longer comfortable. It was clear that at least for now, she was content again. Wanda's loose hair was tickling his chin, and he asked if she minded a kiss on her head. That was not the same as touching her hair, so maybe that wouldn't bother her.
"Right now I don't mind." Wanda made a quiet happy noise and scooted closer, her good hand clasped with Vision's held protectively close. Vision's free hand was alarmingly near her neck, and part of her wanted to hide it. But he isn't even reacting to seeing those marks. It doesn't matter. This is safe.
"Your hair smells of candied strawberries," Vision said in a matter-of-fact manner, which made Wanda stifle a giggle and relax further.
"That's the shampoo we have at the moment." It feels lovely to laugh about something so silly. Wanda closed her eyes.
"Do I need to leave?" Nat asked from the doorway, clearly entertained. "You two left the door open."
"That's okay. Vis is just holding me. Don't tease me." Wanda sounded more amused than embarrassed, and she heard her friend come in and shut the door. "Is something wrong?" In a second she was fully alert and on her feet with Vision's hand clasped with hers. Nat doesn't look worried, but I think she has something important to tell me.
Nat's entertained expression faded. Teasing Wanda was fine, but Natasha didn't want to make her upset, either. "I just have Steve on video call on my laptop. Nothing's wrong, he just wants to talk to you. Vision, stay here, please." The second they were in the hall, she pulled Wanda aside and spoke quietly but firmly. "He's just going to ask you about new missions. You do not have to, you understand? If you want to, great. If you don't, great."
"Nat, I-"
"You heard me. I don't want Cap talking you into doing anything. That's all. Your choice. Not mine. Not his. Not Sam's or Vision's or anyone else's. Yours."
Wanda frowned, but she nodded assent.
_____________
"Hi Steve," Wanda greeted him the second she saw his familiar face on Nat's laptop screen. Yelena wasn't in the room, so she suspected Nat hadn't told him about her sister. I'll keep Yelena to myself then.
"Nat said I should ask you how you felt about returning to missions soon, once you're feeling up to it, before planning anything." Steve sounded so hopeful that Wanda immediately knew why Nat had specifically told her she needed to decide for herself. He began talking animatedly about stopping some petty crime in France undercover and that they needed Nat and Wanda.
"I don't speak French," Wanda interrupted, glancing over at Nat, but her friend just smiled at her encouragingly. "Steve, I am not ready for this right now."
"Sorry, Wanda. You must still be exhausted, and I know your arm is still healing. Just...let us know. Sam and I miss our youngest teammate."
Tell him. Nat said she would support you either way. Tell your friends exactly what you told Vis. "I don't know that I want to...do missions like before at all," Wanda told him hesitantly, but Nat was right there with a hand on her shoulder, so she felt confident enough to speak up and say what she wanted. "Not right now. I don't trust myself. I can't put that suit back on when I am still scared of causing another Lagos incident." I should tell them what I do want to do. What I know I want to do.
"But-"
"Cap, no. No buts. Let her be," Nat interrupted.
"We need her-"
"Yes. Yes, we do need her. Alive and healthy. She's telling us clearly what she doesn't want. Don't pressure her." Nat sounded ever so slightly snappish, but mostly calm. "I told you I suspected she wasn't going to want to right now. Now you heard it directly from her."
"I want to volunteer at an orphanage or a soup kitchen or something," Wanda said softly. "I still want to help. I just...I don't want to do normal missions right now. Does that make sense?" Please understand. Pietro would. I'm still keeping going for both of us if I still help others like us.
Steve still looked a little disappointed, but thankfully he seemed to understand. "That's all right, Wanda. Promise you'll practice with Nat all the same? Please. If anything does go wrong, I want you to feel confident enough to know you can defend yourself easily without hesitating."
"I promise," Wanda said, and she meant it. I can definitely do that. She tried to keep from laughing as she heard Sam in the background saying Steve should do something else besides talk shop with their teammates. I remember what that idiom means.
Sam's familiar face popped up beside Steve's on the screen, and Wanda waved at him. "Binged any good books?" Sam asked.
"Or shows. You'll have to watch some of your sitcom reruns with us whenever we see you and Nat again," Steve added.
Wanda shook her head. "But Vis came to visit. He brought my book Nat gave me last year," she told them. That picture book did not take long for her to read at all, but she was delighted to have it back, more for sentimental reasons than entertainment reasons.
Sam looked slightly worried now, but he did his best to hide it. "Just be careful. Glad you seem happier though. So maybe he's good for you."
Wanda's cheeks turned a bit pink, which made Sam laugh and say that he definitely thought Vision was good for her. "Sam, you stop teasing. You sound like Nat," she commented, giving her friend a pointed look.
Predictably Nat did not look one bit sorry.
"Nah. Make you speak up to tell us to quit," Sam told her, but then added, "But if you are genuinely upset, then I'll stop." Mostly Sam was just relieved that Wanda seemed mostly like her old self, even if she was clearly tired. Even just over the video call, he could tell she was much more relaxed than before, and he was glad she had spoken up herself to say exactly what she wanted to do. "Heard you wanted to do non-fighting related missions instead, right? Helping little kids?"
"I do. I know I'll still need to wait until my arm is completely healed so I can blend in better, but that is what I want to do for now. I am not saying I never want to put that suit on again, but right now, I don't want it." Wanda could feel Nat's approving gaze on her, and that was enough for now. Like I promised Steve, I will practice on my own, what I feel comfortable doing, but I won't risk putting other people in danger again just because I'm stressed and panicking too much to contain explosive things. “I know all of you have tried to say Lagos wasn't my fault, and I...understand that, but I should have been able to contain that thing. I had a lot of people relying on me to do it, and I failed."
Both Steve and Sam looked mad, and Wanda glanced at Nat, who didn't say anything but gave her shoulder a squeeze. "I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Cap," Sam said firmly. "We're not blaming either of you for Lagos. We blame Rumlow. Cap got distracted, and we're lucky you were there at all. Did you fail to fully contain that explosion? Yes. Nobody's arguing that. But you had so little time to react, you're still pretty inexperienced, and you did manage to minimize the damage. What happened was horrible, but you did fine. It was not your fault."
"Sam, I think I do have the power to contain an explosion like that. I don't know what the upper limit of my magic is, but there is a little bit of me saying it's definitely not Rumlow's dumb bomb. I just know it." Wanda looked down at her fingers nervously, debating how to explain what she meant. "In the moment, I felt I had done my best and there wasn't anything else I could have done. But I still...I don't know. There is more of it there, and I don't know how to use it, and I think it's because I am scared to find out."
"If you don't know how to use it, then it isn't part of your toolkit right now. So regardless if you have more power or not, you did everything you could have done. Think about some gifted athletic teenager on target to go to the Olympics eventually when they're older. Do you think if- when- they lose to a trained Olympian, that means they haven't done their best now?" Sam stared straight at Wanda, tapping his fingers together thoughtfully.
"Well, no, of course not."
"That's you. There just isn't a fully trained person out here to teach you how to use everything your power set can do to compare yourself to. You are not a failure for making mistakes, and what you did isn't even really a mistake per se, considering there was nothing better for you to do. Hey, Nat? You pound that into her head, will you?"
"Believe me, she's been told," Nat assured him, pushing Wanda over a bit so she could sit next to her. "She knows."
After the video call, Wanda reluctantly told Vision goodbye yet again, but he promised to come for her again as soon as he could. "I know your new friend may be disappointed she does not get to have her picnic, but I must return to New York. Mr. Stark texted while you were on the video call. He was worried that I ignored him earlier because that secretary was questioning him on my precise whereabouts."
"Vis, that is why I told you to check your phone," Wanda said softly, but she just gave him a hug. "I wish you could stay longer, but I'm glad I could at least see you for a bit again."
"I shall message you the moment I am back. If I cannot physically be with you as often as we would prefer, I will at least be certain not to ignore you." Vision touched Wanda's chin gently and kissed the tip of her nose, which made her smile. "This is safe, yes?"
"Safe," Wanda assured him, "always safe."
_________________
Antonia returned with Lerato in the late afternoon and found Wanda in the living room setting up a board game with everyone else. "Wanda, this is Lerato. I wanted you to meet her," she told her new friend. "Lerato, this is Wanda. She's staying here at Melina's for awhile."
"Oh, you made a new friend the second I left," Lerato teased in a deadpan sort of voice, but she didn't seem upset. "Good. Are we all going to be in trouble if someone finds her and Natasha here though? They are rogue Avengers."
Antonia froze and bit her lip. Wanda stood there awkwardly until Melina interfered and just said, "Yes, of course, but nobody is going to find them. They both blend fine."
Lerato looked at Wanda thoughtfully. Natasha she knew blended in, but she did not know Wanda. But this girl seemed to be around the same age as Antonia and herself, and Melina was probably right. She stuck her hand out abruptly to Wanda to shake her hand. "I do not know if I should trust Antonia's judgement or mine, but you seem like you fit here fine. So, hello. I am pleased to meet you."
Wanda thought Lerato sounded awkward, like she wasn't entirely sure how to socialize either and had been reciting a greeting she'd read in a book. It immediately made it easier to respond, and Lerato offering to shake hands was nice. She appeared curious, not frightened of her. "You...saw the news?"
"Everyone knows news is not entirely fact. We should know. Have you seen the few reports about Antonia? They do not even use her name," Lerato pointed out. She shook her head hard enough to make her dark braids swing and made a face as she plopped on the carpet next to Antonia.
"Thank goodness they don't," Antonia muttered, "because the reporters don't know who Taskmaster was at all and I don't want to be known as that brainwashed killing machine."
"You always knew me," Lerato informed her, "and I could tell even then." She blinked several times, as if trying to clear her head, and didn't say anything else. "Hey, you have mind powers, right? Can you tell us which feelings were really ours and which ones aren't?"
"You...want me to poke at your head?" Wanda asked, flabbergasted at that question. She watched Lerato hug Antonia tightly. Whether Lerato liked Antonia the same way or not, Wanda wasn't sure, but she could tell the two of them cared about each other very much. Hugs did not tell her anything when that was something she wanted from any of her trusted friends, Vision or not. Why would she ask that? She doesn't even know me. I don't want to hurt her.
"Well, no, but not knowing which feelings are real is much worse than a nice girl I do not know peeking at my memories." Lerato was still holding onto Antonia tightly, but she was gazing intently at Wanda over Antonia's shoulder.
Wanda stared back, fiddling with her fingers nervously and wishing one of the others would say something, but all of them seemed to be waiting for her to respond, even noisy Alexei. For once I wish that man would say something, and he isn't. The half-set-up Monopoly game sat forgotten on the coffee table. "I do not think any of the people in charge in the Red Room would want you to care for each other at all," she said finally, "so if you knew each other before and cared at all, all of those feelings must be real." Wanda glanced at Melina for confirmation, and the older Widow nodded.
"Girls, she is right. Antonia in particular, you were forced to be machine. If you felt anything more, those emotions are yours, even if you could not act on them." Melina sighed and retreated into the kitchen.
"All you girls have gone soft," Alexei grumbled.
This made Wanda genuinely angry, and she slipped away from Nat, her eyes faintly glowing red. "You be quiet," she ordered, "and don't say such a thing. That is horrible."
"Ah, my little Natasha's friend is tougher than she looks," Alexei said good-naturedly. He seemed completely oblivious as to why Wanda had snapped at him.
"Say that again and I will drop you in Melina's pigpen." Wanda was aware everyone else was staring at her, but they all seemed intrigued rather than angry or scared. Well, not of me. Alexei scares Lerato and Antonia, evidently, she thought, which made her skin crawl. Wanda wondered what Alexei could have possibly done to them and then thought she probably didn't want to know. Or, probably nothing specifically to them. Nat told me she and Yelena broke him out of prison. They probably just know stories.
"I would love to see that," Yelena said, quite pleased.
"She speaks up for friends and not self," Alexei said, looking nonplussed and still confused. And then, "Can you do that?" in a far too curious tone.
"She most certainly can," Nat told him. She smiled at Wanda and tried not to laugh. Maybe Alexei was way out of line saying such things, but his oblivious behavior was making Wanda speak up, so Nat did not tell him anything like she usually would.
It seemed Wanda had not made the Red Guardian stop at all, because now he was happily suggesting for her to go outside with him and demonstrate. The entire group trooped outside, and Wanda's eyes sparkled with mischief. Using her magic on Alexei somehow did not bother her one bit, and watching him plant his feet so intensely on the ground as if that would hold him in place was funny.
"Someone count us down," Alexei called.
Wanda knew she still couldn't really use her magic properly with her healing arm, but she didn't need that to plop a singular person into the pigpen, even if that person was a super soldier. The second 'one' was called out, she swept her good hand through the air and sent Alexei into the pigpen with a hazy burst of scarlet with a thump, not hard, but not particularly gently, either.
Yelena was not making any effort to keep from laughing, and Wanda worried she might have made Alexei upset instead of just trying to make him cease his comments she hated so much, but Alexei was smiling himself. "Two out of three, two out of three!" he shouted. "I didn't even get a chance to move. Let's start closer together."
"Alexei, don't you touch her," Nat ordered sharply. "That is literally the point. Wanda is a distance fighter. You like close range. You're not sparring with her right now, not until she's completely healed. Point has been made, she can toss your weight around with her magic easily."
"Ah, Natasha, she is fine." Alexei planted his feet, this time within about an arm's length from Wanda.
Wanda put him in the pigpen again before anyone could do the countdown. Alexei scrambled out.
The pigs looked a bit offended at being disturbed twice now.
"I will spar properly if Nat thinks it's safe for me," Wanda said in her best calm voice. "Not one second before." Then she turned to go back inside.
Much to Wanda's dismay, it seemed this entire scenario had just made her grow on Alexei more, because he clapped her on the shoulder hard and smiled broadly. Wanda stumbled and nearly fell, but Nat was right there and caught her. "I see why my Natasha cares for you so much. I will count you as the third sister," Alexei said, and tromped past her back into the house with Melina scolding him for tracking mud all over.
"What have I done?" Wanda muttered to herself, and she felt Nat squeezing her close.
"You just got yourself an infuriating man who thinks he's a dad," Natasha whispered in her ear.
"That man is not like Clint at all."
Natasha smiled and hugged her a bit more tightly. She had been worried being around Alexei would make it more difficult for Wanda to feel better, but whatever weird dynamic their mismatched group had right now, it seemed to have made Wanda's protective, more confident side pop out, at least for now. "No, he isn't. Clint would be happy to hear you say that."
Notes:
Obviously Wanda isn’t going to not do active missions permanently, but I felt she needed a chance to speak up for herself. She has been pretty quiet and going along with her friends’ plans for a long time (before and after the Raft, honestly) and hasn’t really been given the chance to choose.
Alexei might be self-centered and frustrating, but in an odd sort of way, butting heads with him is probably good for Wanda since she doesn’t mind speaking up on behalf of her friends lol!
Next chapter: a trip into the city...
Any feedback is much appreciated<3
Chapter 24: Chapter 24
Summary:
In which Wanda and Antonia spend a bit of time together, Wanda tries to make sure Nat is taking care of herself as much as Nat has been taking care of her, and a small rescue mission is set up.
Notes:
As per usual, I’m sorry for the wait and I hope you enjoy!:)
Not sure if this deserves a TW, but as we all know, Dreykov was a nasty abusive excuse of a person and Antonia talks about what her (really horrible) father did.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The next few days passed peacefully, if busy. Though Wanda did not leave Melina's property at all, she did eagerly join the others in helping care for the pigs, cleaning up outside, and some very limited sparring practice. Wanda still tired easily and had to stop and rest often, but she felt herself growing stronger and was able to last a bit longer each day all the same.
Upon discovering Wanda did not mind using her magic on Alexei at all and didn't seem to hesitate like she had when practicing back at the vacation house in New York, Nat told him to practice with her, which Yelena and Antonia found exceedingly funny and Alexei found mortifying. Alexei was clearly not angry with her, but he seemed baffled all the same. "Natasha, your little friend should have been able to escape prison herself," he told Nat a bit too loudly. "She is more than strong enough. Why she choose staying there?"
Nat turned on him instantly, her gaze sharp. "She didn't. You know that. You needed Yelena and me to break you out; don't you say Wanda chose to stay trapped on the Raft. Did you want to stay in yours?"
"Seems those shitholes are hardly the same, not when that girl has power no one else does. People are lucky she is inexperienced nice person." Alexei studied Wanda standing awkwardly a few feet away, who didn't look particularly angry or upset, just waiting. "She's sloppy, she does not fight like you and other widows, she gets tired so fast. Still should be able to get out. She splits rock in half like nothing. She could split captors in half like nothing."
"Alexei, they put a shock collar on her so she couldn't use her magic. Without her enhancements, she's not any stronger than an ordinary person her size. Leave her be. I'm not teaching her to split humans in half."
"What teaching? Humans are easier to chop than rocks. She does not need teaching. Your little scarlet wisp friend is soft. She holds back. Collar shouldn't have got on her at all."
Wanda quietly excused herself and slipped back inside, resting her head against the wall. That may be true, but I didn't want to kill those guards...did I? I wanted to get away and them to leave me alone. Looking back now, she suspected she could have escaped the airport...if and only if she'd been willing to kill the strike teams. She had been tired and disoriented, so realistically, mind-controlling that many people wouldn't have been a viable option even if she was okay with doing that. Alexei was right that killing them would have been all too easy, but she couldn't remotely justify that to herself. Those people had just been following orders to apprehend her. And they didn't think of me as a person anyway, so they treated me like trash. Alexei isn't a trustworthy source of information. I should ignore him.
Once on the Raft, she wasn't sure what to think. If only she'd attempted to escape sooner, she thought she might have had a chance. Six days of nothing but water combined with unknown sedative drugs meant you couldn't think straight to plan it out properly. Then you got hurt worse and nobody took care of those injuries for a long time more. You did your best and you know it. Don't be silly. You're still here, you survived, that's all we could do before too, remember? It's okay, Wanda, Pietro's kind scolding voice flitted through Wanda's head, and she knew Nat would tell her the same, had told her the same.
She took a deep breath, ignoring the small remaining twinge in her ribs from doing that; that felt almost normal again and was easily ignored now. "I'm fine," Wanda told herself aloud, "I am fine and I am not going to feel like I messed up for not killing people in that prison." If Pietro was still there, he would tell her she was being dumb and give her a hug. There was no doubt in her mind that her lost twin would see absolutely nothing wrong with killing those people if they meant to hurt her, but she also knew he would understand why she hadn't.
Pietro would have just grabbed me and run out of the airport, that's what would have happened, she thought fondly. I'm glad you didn't have to go to the Raft, at least. Better me than you, Pietro. I know you'd hate me saying that, but I don't care. Pietro was enhanced too, just like her, so he probably would have been treated horribly there too, though she suspected Pietro would have been a little bit safer simply because he couldn't mind-control people.
"You are okay?" Melina's voice cut into Wanda's thoughts, and she looked up and nodded.
"I'm fine, just...thinking," Wanda said honestly.
"Heard you talking to yourself. Perhaps it is different strength not to kill prison staff. Not better or worse, just different." Melina paused, watching Wanda closely. "I heard what my Alexei said to you. He is right. Raft staff was lucky you are inexperienced nice person. He is wrong, also. You did not 'choose' to remain in that place."
"I don't understand what you mean."
"You do not naturally listen to own dark impulses, or have taught yourself not to. I think the second. You do not know limits because those limits involve things you believe are morally wrong," Melina told her. "Sometimes killing threats is easier than letting them live. I am no innocent, Wanda. I know this." She studied Wanda for a moment, decided she was satisfied Natasha's friend had listened, and walked away. "You owe yourself one mission, you know. Make sure you decide no because job isn't for you, not because you don't trust self."
That is true, I suppose. Maybe a low-stakes...something. I know I don't want to because I don't trust myself. I can't risk making another mistake under pressure that hurts people. "Melina?" Wanda called. The older Widow paused and turned in the doorway. "Thank you for talking to me, and also for letting me stay here with Nat."
Wanda could tell her words made Melina happy, even if she didn't really show it much. "Of course. Perhaps selfishly it is good for the girls to be around normal girl for awhile also."
"...Me?"
"Yes. I know where you are from. You understand us, you know what being considered a weapon is like, but you are no trained killer, either. Glad Antonia in particular is getting to spend bit of time with you," Melina said matter-of-factly. "I know she has been sad over how some people in city have treated her. Not all, but some."
Wanda wondered if Melina meant that people had been rude to Antonia because of her association with the Red Room, or just because of her burn scars. She suspected the latter since obviously Antonia wasn't going around St. Petersburg announcing she had been Taskmaster, and nobody would just automatically assume she was one of the widows unless they were told. "I like Antonia. She's been nothing but kind to me and she is nice to spend time with. She's funny and she likes cats. My...my brother liked cats." Wanda wasn't quite sure how to explain that another girl around her own age immediately willing to treat her like a friend meant a great deal to her. It probably means a great deal to Antonia too, Wanda realized.
Melina stayed quiet for a minute and then just said, "Difficult to talk of those we have lost. Good for you."
_________________
In the evening, Antonia and Wanda lay on their beds in the dim shared bedroom after dinner. "If I tell you something, can you promise not to tell?" Antonia asked in Russian.
"Definitely, unless it puts you or someone else in danger." Wanda was surprised when her answer made Antonia stifle a laugh. "I wasn't trying to be funny, honest."
"I know. It's just, it sounded like something Natalia would say. Did she teach you that about ordinary secrets?"
Wanda turned over to face the wall, hugging the duck picture book to her chest. No, but she has said similar. "My parents did, when I was little," she whispered.
Antonia stayed silent for a long moment. Wanda sounded sad all of a sudden, but not exactly distressed either. That was not something she knew how to react to. "What were your parents like?" Antonia asked finally.
Wanda tensed briefly, and she didn't look at Antonia at all, but she decided to just answer honestly anyway. Antonia won't care. She doesn't know what to say either, and randomly asking me that proves it. "They loved Pietro and me to bits. You could just be around them and feel safe. Mama taught me how to sew things. Once she altered a fancy holiday dress my friend gave me. I helped. Papa taught me how to handle a gun safely. Not...practice or anything, just safety things. He knew they scared me and he didn't want me to be scared of them. He said I should be scared of a bad person using one, not the actual weapon." Wanda could remember him specifically instructing Pietro and her never to touch it as far back as she could remember, but their daddy didn't hide the gun's existence from them either. It was just a thing you didn't touch, like the hot stove. After the twins had turned nine, Oleg did teach Pietro how to use it (with the caveat NEVER touch with no trusted adult present) and offered Wanda the same, but she hadn't wanted anything to do with it and contented herself with watching instead.
Wanda knew now that their parents had been far more worried than they let on about something happening to them to ultimately leave their children alone on their own, and tried to give Pietro and her as much knowledge of how to survive by themselves as possible without frightening them. They did. They must have. No one could have predicted that bomb, but... "I still miss them. I know it has been a very long time, but I still do anyway."
"Wish my father was like yours," Antonia whispered. "I was never close to him like you just said you were with yours, but I did still believe he loved me when I was little, before the explosion. He just wasn't there to talk to very much. After, he just...couldn't or wouldn't look at me. I wasn't his cute, pretty little kid anymore and he threatened the poor doctors at the hospital because I was ugly and they weren't fixing it. I don't..." Antonia hesitated, as if she was unsure if what she was saying made sense. "I don't understand how he cared enough to yell at innocent people for not being able to heal me completely, but then also ignore me in the hospital and when I came home until he put me in the Taskmaster suit...suits."
"That behavior is disgusting. You just didn't fit his image of you anymore." Wanda bit her lip, unsure what else to say. What was there to say, after all? She could not undo what Dreykov had done to her new friend, and she easily sensed that his reaction had hurt Antonia much more than being caught in the explosion in the first place. No wonder Antonia had willingly forgiven Nat for her part in the whole thing. Antonia must have been so scared and lonely and...hurting.
"I still have the chip, you know. He said it would help the pain...which was technically true. He could have just had the chip implanted and not done all of the other things to me." Antonia sounded upset again now, so Wanda instinctively got up and went over to her. "...What are you doing?"
"Do you want a hug?" Wanda asked softly. That always helps me. I don't know Antonia that well, so maybe she wouldn't want one from me, but I am going to offer anyway. Much to her surprise, the other girl bounced to her feet and squeezed her hard. Wanda made a quiet pained noise but didn't try to pull away. Instead she returned the gesture as best she could.
"You're weird. I like you, not like I do Lerato, but...still. You are a good friend. Don't let the news or people like that Ross guy I heard about hurt you, either. They don't know you."
People like that won't even give me a chance to get to know me. "Why didn't you go with her to your new apartment in the city yet? She said it was ready." Wanda padded back to her own bed and plopped herself back under the covers. Across the room, she could hear Antonia doing the same thing.
"That was my secret. Part of me wants to stay here longer. Once I leave, it will be like diving into a new world I don't know. Lerato wasn't upset with me, but I could tell she wanted me to come with her this evening." Antonia sighed. "She already has a new job as a waitress in one of the restaurants. She likes it, though she also said she wished she could 'assassinate some of those damn customers'."
"I can believe that. I have seen some very rude people," Wanda answered.
"What would your parents have done with you if you were horrifically injured like I was?"
That was an abrupt topic change. "Probably cry about it in private, but make sure I never saw them do it," Wanda said quietly. "They would not have treated me any differently at all. Once when I was little I cut my forehead badly while tussling with Pietro in our room. I think I hit the corner of the bed frame or something. Anyway, I was a bit of a...prissy little kid sometimes. I made a big fuss over having a bandage on it because I thought it looked ugly. They told me I shouldn't care because one, it didn't look ugly or pretty, it was just there, and two, I could tell funny stories when I went to school." Wanda was a bit embarrassed at her younger self's behavior, but she could hear Antonia stifling laughter. "I did not tell funny stories, but I can remember putting stickers on the bandage at school and being very pleased about it."
"You were probably really cute," Antonia said, burying her face in her pillow and trying not to laugh whilst utterly failing. "Why would you put stickers on it?"
"They were sparkly ones my friend had. At seven, I thought it looked pretty."
"Oh my god."
"I didn't say it made sense."
"I mean...from a seven-year-old's perspective, it does," Antonia pointed out.
"Are we missing out on a good joke?" Yelena asked loudly from the hallway.
"Yes, you are," Antonia called, "your sister's friend is very funny."
Wanda heard Yelena laughing and then Nat saying a quiet, "Let them be. I'm glad they are happy. They deserve it."
Wanda was quite certain that Nat was probably very relieved that she was happy without relying on Nat to be okay. For now, knowing her trusted friend was across the hall was plenty for her.
"Your parents sound perfect, you know," Antonia said softly into the darkness after a minute.
"They were not, but they were to me." I still miss them. Wanda remembered another time when she and Pietro had just turned four, they had gotten into mischief drawing with their new birthday markers all over the bathroom door while happily eating far too much cereal and spilling it all over. Their mother discovered the mess and cried, which had scared the four-year-old twins and made them hug Iryna. Iryna sighed and made them help start cleaning up the mess. Their father came home from work horribly exhausted while they were still cleaning up, and yelled at them for it...and then apologized mere minutes later for yelling, promising that would never happen again. And it didn't. Thinking about the incident now made Wanda smile. Even Papa made mistakes, and he willingly admitted it too. I'm not even sure if yelling at us was wrong, since we really did make a big mess. But he knew he had frightened us, and he didn't want us frightened or hurt, just to...stop making the destructive mischief.
”I am sorry, you two. You cannot waste food or draw on the door. That is wasteful and destructive. But that does not make it okay for grownups to yell at you. Yelling at you for being naughty is unacceptable. I will never do that to you again. I love both of you very much." It was not Wanda's earliest memory, but it was one of her most vivid early childhood memories all the same. She could remember their papa holding both her and Pietro close for a long time before helping them finish cleaning up the mess they had made.
If I ever have children, I want to be like my parents were.
__________________
"You still okay?" Nat asked the next morning when she took Wanda aside into her room to help her get the adjustable splint off her arm for good this time and just wrap the sore elbow instead.
"Irrationally nervous, but it feels more or less okay," Wanda answered truthfully. "I hate having that thing on my arm, but it feels weird now to take it off for good, like something is missing. I don't want it to hurt anymore. It makes me tired." She thought feeling nervous now was all the more ridiculous considering Nat had been helping her move it a bit every day for a while now.
But Natasha only nodded, as if that sounded entirely normal to her. "That's understandable. We just don't want it hurting you like before, that's all. It probably won't feel back to normal for awhile yet. Can you touch your nose?"
Wanda's eyes sparkled mischievously; she touched her nose with her good hand and waited for Nat's reaction. Predictably her friend pretended to be annoyed, but smiled and shook her head, telling her to try with the other one. "I don't think I can, but I'll try," Wanda said. Much to her own annoyance, her left hand still shook badly and it just felt awkward and stiff trying to move the arm by herself in a way that meant bending her elbow further.
Nat could tell Wanda was getting irritated now. "You don't have to do-"
"There," Wanda interrupted, the stiff elbow just barely letting her fingertips reach her face. Why am I so satisfied I could do it at all? I am such a mess. But Natasha was smiling at her, and obviously relieved besides.
"Don't force it, you 'I'm fine' person. You can't expect it to be fully back to normal immediately just because we think it's healed enough and we took the splint off. What you just did is good enough for us to know it's healing fine. How about a bit of magic? Just a little bit," Natasha said firmly, suspicious Wanda would just try to jump to doing larger things with it.
Wanda tentatively let a bit of scarlet swirl around her fingers and lifted a few pens and pencils on the desk, which did not hurt at all, though she suspected if she tried to do much more at the moment, then it probably would still hurt. "That is actually much easier than trying to make it touch my nose," she admitted. "Does not hurt."
"Good." Nat knew Wanda hated being fussed over, so she didn't give any more praise or study it further, but she did give Wanda a hug. "I'm so glad you're feeling better. Hearing you laughing with Antonia last night was good. This," she gestured at Wanda's arm, "this is no big deal. The other is different."
"I am trying. I told Vis this already, but I don't want to keep relying on you so much. It isn't fair to you." Wanda ran her fingers around the edge of the desk in Yelena's and Nat's shared bedroom. I know she doesn't mind, but I don't want to keep her from doing things she wants to do on her own, either.
Natasha crossed her arms and gave Wanda a pointed look. "That sounds less okay, not more. I don't mind helping you. That's what friends and teammates are for."
Wanda smiled slightly. "I know. I also know if I wasn't hurt, you would be doing other things besides checking on me to make sure I feel okay, making sure I practice safely, and helping me with my arm," she pointed out.
"You'd do the same."
"I would, but it still means a lot to me. I'm not unobservant, Nat. I know dealing with me is exhausting. I may not know how to fix that, but I can do my best to, and I can say thank you." Wanda paused, fiddling with her nails and thinking. Nat is my best friend besides Pietro. She means the world to me. I hurt her last year and she just immediately accepted me anyway. She never treated me like a thing even when I had scared her.
"Fine. I won't lie to you. You do make me tired sometimes, but I don't care. I enjoy having you around. Also...it's nice to be able to do for you what Clint did for me once upon a time." Natasha looked at her, eyes shining slightly in a way Wanda did not like, because she could tell her friend was upset, even if she wasn't saying so. "There is nothing you need to 'fix'. Don't ever be anything but yourself just because you think you're making me tired."
"You don't take care of yourself enough. You tell me I should do that, and you don't yourself. If I let you get exhausted helping me, what kind of friend would I be?" Wanda blinked, touching the wrap on her elbow lightly. "A bad one, that's what. I stopped counting days finally, so I lost track, but it has been weeks since you and Steve got us out. A month and a half or so, I think. Maybe a bit more."
"And you still think I've been spending too much time helping you?"
"Yes. You stayed with me almost constantly at the vacation house. I might not remember many details of those first few days, but I remember you. I remember you just...being there. Everyone, really, but especially you. I didn't feel good, obviously, but it was like a dream after...you know." Wanda did not think she wanted to discuss what had happened then again right now, but she knew quite well that Nat understood exactly what she meant. I can remember lying in bed still feeling weird and awful, but I had my friends right there in the room with me. "My point is just that I feel well enough now to recognize just how much you have been doing for me, and I want you to take care of you, now."
Nat sighed, both understanding what Wanda meant and also hating it anyway. "Wanda, you do realize you've been giving me plenty of space and time to do other things, like being with Yelena. There might only be one of me and two of you, true, but it doesn't matter."
"Yes, I know. But I also heard Yelena talking to you yesterday. She wants you to go with her to rescue two more ex-widows Melina located, and you said no."
"Do you really want me to leave you here?" Natasha asked quietly. "I promised you I wouldn't unless you were safe on your own. Yelena can take Melina or Lerato with her. Not Antonia, she doesn't blend in easily. Those girls don't need me specifically to rescue them."
Wanda considered how to answer that clearly. "I do not think you would have brought me here if it wasn't safe. I don't want you to leave, but I think I would be okay. Or, maybe I could...come too?" she finished with the question. I think I could do this. At worst, even if I did end up being useless, I don't think I would drag the others down, at least not much...
Natasha crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at her. "I would be happy to take you, if and only if you're confident you can handle it. You said you didn't want to do missions right now. I don't want you doing this unless you want to, that's all. Don't offer to come just so I'll go."
"I understand."
"If you're sure, go find Yelena and tell her you and I are going with her then."
"...Me?"
Natasha nodded and spoke firmly, but she seemed happy. "Yes, you. You want to come, you're telling her. You can do it."
Wanda smiled a bit and dipped her head. I can do that much.
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Yelena grinned when Wanda shyly explained the new plan outside in the front yard. "Good. I would rather have my sister to myself, but she refuses to go anywhere without you. She said she promised not to unless you were safe on your own. You do realize you are safer here than helping with this, right?"
"I do, but..."
"But she is safe person to you. You do not mind this kind of danger," Yelena interrupted.
Wanda nodded. "I know I can defend myself in a fight," she said softly. "What I am scared of has nothing to do with...that anymore, really. I don't want to hurt anyone else. That is why I told Nat I didn't want to do missions right now. This, I think I can handle. If only two very skilled normal humans were supposed to go, then you and Nat don't really need me. I'm just extra backup. My limited experience should be okay even without me using...you know." My magic. I am not using it for this.
Yelena looked at Wanda thoughtfully. "What if something goes wrong? I am not dragging somebody panicking around."
"Leave me if you have to, then."
"Stupid. I will not do that," Yelena shot back.
Why? I haven't even known you very long. Wanda didn't answer right away, but she finally just said, "I can't guarantee I won't, but I think I won't."
"Good enough." Yelena didn't hug, but she did smile and relax. "Sharing my sister with you is annoying. Not your fault, though. So, you can trust me to not leave you behind." Then she walked away, saying to be ready to leave in an hour.
________________
Antonia immediately looked intrigued when Wanda told her what she was planning to do with the others. "Are you bringing the new girls back here?" she asked hopefully in Russian. "Melina never lets me help rescue any of them that we find because I can't blend no matter what I do. Well, unless I wear the Taskmaster armor, and I don't want to wear that suit anymore."
"I'm not sure."
"Well, I hope you are." Antonia hesitated before adding, "I could help you hide yours with makeup if you want to." She touched her own neck and then pointed at Wanda's. "Only if you want to. I thought you'd like that better than wearing a scarf to blend in."
Wanda's hand flitted to her neck; she tensed but immediately nodded. "I think I would. I...I'm just not sure I want anyone touching it," she admitted, half worried her new friend would be upset, but Antonia only shrugged.
"That's okay. We could try, and if you don't like it, I'll stop. You'd be easier to practice on than me. Obviously." Antonia held out her arm next to Wanda's, studying their skin tones closely. "I don't think my makeup Melina let me buy will match your skin properly, but it should be close. Do you have some, maybe? I know I've seen you with eye shadow here at least."
Wanda nodded. "Not everything I had back at the Compound, but Vis brought me some of it when he first brought my backpack. My hand still shakes a bit and it makes eyeliner hard to do," she muttered. Also I knew I shouldn't do my normal makeup in public anymore anyway. Here is okay, but...
"Well, show me what you have. Maybe we can mix mine and yours and get something that works? I won't touch it anymore if you say quit it. I promise." Antonia seemed so hopeful that Wanda instantly relaxed.
They decided to experiment in the bathroom, which Melina pretended not to notice even though she walked by the open door and looked far too pleased. Antonia spread their 'disguise supplies', as she called it, across the sink counter. Wanda watched her curiously and said nothing. She tilted her head when Antonia asked her to and squeezed her hands into fists the second Antonia touched her neck. It's fine. Antonia is my friend. I let Nat help me take care of it. There's not much there to hurt anymore. It just still is obvious something burned me.
"Do you want to stop? You are all tense," Antonia said. "I don't want to hurt it, either. It doesn't look too painful anymore, but I know it's probably still tender to touch in the deeper spots..."
"No, I'm fine."
"Okay, well. I have burns. I know yours can't feel back to normal already. It takes forever even if they look healed."
"They're fine," Wanda said quietly. "It just feels strange to let someone else besides Nat touch it and know it won't hurt me." That's the truth. It doesn't really hurt anymore at all unless I poke at the healed prong marks.
Antonia experimented a bit mixing colors before feeling satisfied it more or less matched Wanda's natural skin tone. "Why are there these weird puncture marks?" she asked bluntly.
"Because there were prongs on the shock collar that dug in, that's why." Wanda hadn't wanted to explain details to Yelena before, but telling Antonia was different and seemed okay to her.
"That, sounds horrid."
"It was." Wanda couldn't relax, and she fiddled with her fingers nervously. Antonia seemed unbothered, which helped, but Wanda still wanted to bolt. I am fine. This is safe.
"Okay, I'm not doing this to you anymore," Antonia said abruptly. She shook her head and backed up, crossing her arms. "You are getting all anxious and I don't like it. It definitely works, but I do not think it's worth it." She watched Wanda studying herself in the mirror and pushed her over a bit. "Look, yours aren't so bad, see?" Antonia's eyes sparkled as she added, "I am going to make Lerato dress up as Christine at Halloween. I remember dressing up when I was little, before the explosion. I would be a perfect Phantom."
Wanda thought Antonia looked far too pleased with herself, especially because she began singing the Phantom of the Opera theme in an overly dramatic manner that didn't sound half bad and was actually quite decent. "You have an audience," Wanda said after a few seconds, because there was a very befuddled Alexei and a smiling Melina in the hallway. I like Antonia. She's funny and that behavior reminds me of Pietro. That is something he would have done.
"Did not know Taskmaster could sing," Alexei said, but he was obviously curious, not displeased.
Antonia's happy expression faded. "I told you I don't want to be called that."
"But you were so talented."
"Well, now I am going to be talented at something else. Something I pick for myself," Antonia said so quietly the others could barely hear her. Then, in her normal voice, "Come on, Wanda. Let's go back in the bedroom and I could help you finish getting ready to leave. You probably have weapons and things like that to bring."
Wanda considered speaking up in Antonia's defense, but she thought Antonia's words expressed her thoughts more than enough. By the time Nat knocked on the door a few minutes later, she found herself more excited than anxious. I can do this. I have supplies, I have tools, and I won't even need to access my magic for this anyway. “I'm ready. Let's go."
Notes:
Yay, Wanda’s arm is allllmost healed and she feels much much better by now:) This is a bit of a “bridge” chapter obviously, but omg I sure did have fun writing Wanda and Antonia interacting, those traumatized lovable messes that they are lol. We’ll be sending Antonia off to her new apartment in the city with Lerato soon, but for now she’s still at Melina’s.
I hope it’s clear that Melina’s assessment of Wanda’s backing away from missions simply because she is worried about another Lagos occurrence and not because she doesn’t like the job is accurate. Melina hasn’t known Wanda very long, but she can tell enough to know she wants to make sure Wanda makes that choice for the right reasons and does so for herself.
Any feedback is much appreciated<3
Chapter 25: Chapter 25
Summary:
In which Wanda helps Nat and Yelena rescue two more ex-widows.
Notes:
TW for general abuse and implied SA. If it’s about the Red Room... I think all of us know that happened to every single girl in that place without exception. Certainly Dreykov wasn’t running the place alone, and I’ve unceremoniously killed off my two OCs’ handler in this chapter, just saying ahead of time. (none of our characters question this and I won’t make them do so, either.)
ANYWAYS. I hope you enjoy the chapter all the same and that it’s worth the wait. It’s nice giving Wanda a chance to help others herself, and I’ve gotten a bit attached to Polina and Makenzie aka Marta already even though they’ll just be minor secondary characters here:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"Like you assumed, you play backup," Nat told Wanda once she, Wanda, and Yelena were in the car Melina told them to take. Natasha told Yelena to sit in the backseat with Wanda, to which Yelena shrugged and agreed. Wanda knew why Nat had done that; Nat knew she still didn't like being in the car, even if she was more comfortable with it now than before, at least. "You know how to use the widow bites, and you have a knife, taser, and gun concealed on you, yes?"
Wanda nodded. Somehow carrying some of her friend's normal toolkit made her feel more in-character. They were supposed to blend in as ordinary citizens, but should she get revealed at all, Wanda knew Nat wanted her to be 'identified' as merely another girl escaped from the Red Room trying to help free more, not a fugitive Avenger.
"But she does not fight the same way we do," Yelena pointed out, which was true. "I can tell you taught her, but she's sloppy because she always uses her enhancements or magic or whatever it is. And her arm is still messed up. Also, she evidently hates riding in cars," she added, eyeing Wanda curiously. "Why are you all scrunched in your seat?"
Wanda didn't answer, but she tried to relax. It was okay if Yelena knew she was uncomfortable, but she didn't want anyone else realizing the same thing. This is fine. I wanted to come. I think I can do this.
"She's competent enough a stranger won't question her if it comes to that, and she speaks fluent Russian. She'll be fine," Nat said firmly. "Ideally we don't want Wanda fighting at all because we don't want her re-injuring that arm, but she can play distraction and if we do end up needing more backup, she's here. Wanda, do you understand? We're trusting you to listen. We have comms, so you are our emergency backup only. Can you do that? If not, that's fine, but then you're staying out and just be ready to leave, period, no matter what you might hear. I can't have you in a position where you might have to engage unless you're absolutely certain you can handle that."
Wanda blinked, looked down at her hands, and then touched her mostly healed arm lightly. "I am comfortable with that as long as it's okay I can't function at 100% yet." Nat knows that already, but I'm not going to just say yes, either.
"That's fine. You shouldn't have to do much, if anything. I just want you to be ready, just in case. You'll probably end up escorting one of the girls to safety after we give them the antidote. One is younger than you two. She's going by Marta, as you know, but her real name is Makenzie. We don't know if she can remember being Makenzie or not. The other is older, older than I am but younger than Melina. Her name is Polina." Nat eyed Wanda in the rear view mirror and added, "You are responsible for helping keep Makenzie calm on the way back to Melina's after this. I think you have the best chance to do that."
"I will not mind-control her," Wanda said quietly.
Yelena glanced at her. "She thinks you can calm her down because you're good with kids, not because of your enhancements. She told me so. Marta-Makenzie is pretty much a kid. She's fourteen. So you get the traumatized, probably violent kid once we retrieve her."
Wanda didn't answer this beyond a silent nod; she didn't exactly trust herself to do that successfully, but she knew she could try and that it would not hurt this girl. Do either of them have any family members that want them? And if they do, will they understand that where they have been isn't their fault?
"They're going to find out you and Wanda are two fugitive Avengers," Yelena pointed out.
Natasha didn't smile, but her eyes looked darkly amused. "That may make them like us more instead of less. Wanda, I want you to be careful if we do end up needing you. Avoid using your magic, but if you absolutely have to, then do it. I'd rather deal with the fallout from that than further risk losing you."
"I don't want to get Yelena mixed up with us," Wanda said quietly. "If I use my magic, that immediately identifies me."
"Not if you make them forget they saw it," Yelena said casually, looking straight at Wanda. "That is not mind-control."
Wanda flinched and moved closer to the door. "I don't want to do that. Not to any innocent people. Would you like if I did that to you?"
Yelena tilted her head, studying Wanda. "No. But if I was you, I would do it if I had to. It is just other weapon, not good or bad."
I don't want to be a weapon. Wanda knew Yelena didn't mean anything by that comment whatsoever and that she was trying to help, but it still seemed to her that meddling with someone's head like that wouldn't be right. Not unless it was someone like Ross or that disturbing man that had harassed Natasha and her at that little motel back in New York. Even then, she wasn't sure it was really okay to do so. Just because she wanted to didn't mean it was okay.
She had wanted to destroy Tony Stark once upon a time, after all. That was not okay. Wanda still didn't like Tony, but she didn't want to hurt him, either. The dark part of her still relished doing things like dropping all those cars on him back in the Leipzig airport, though... What is wrong with me? Nat would tell me it's okay, because I knew his armor would protect him and we were fighting. Wanda shook her head hard and hugged herself a bit.
"Protecting yourself is not wrong," Yelena went on. "You do not have to kill someone to make sure they say nothing."
"I know."
Natasha didn't correct this, since it was technically true. She was not going to attempt forcing Wanda to do anything with her magic that she felt morally uncomfortable with, even if it made things more difficult, but she would make sure Wanda knew her teammates thought it was fine, at least.
______________
They drove on in silence for a bit. Wanda wondered if her bad arm was strong enough to drive safely now, because she didn't think it was fair for Natasha or Yelena to have to do all the driving, but they didn't seem to care.
"Probably about an hour from here til we reach Zelenogorsk," Nat commented. "To our knowledge, Polina is still working at the Ant Museum. Hopefully she'll lead us to Makenzie once she has the antidote. We know they're both in Zelenogorsk, but Melina hasn't been able to pin down a visual for Makenzie in about a week."
"Ant Museum. Sounds like a place Scott would like," Wanda deadpanned, looking greatly amused with herself, which made both Yelena and Nat laugh.
"Library and children's museum," Yelena explained. "I wish I got to go there as a kid. The bug statues out front are cool."
That comment seemed to pop a hole in everyone's balloon, and the three of them were quiet after that, although Wanda did offer Yelena a hug. Yelena pretended she did not want it, but then hugged Wanda herself, which very much reminded Wanda of Pietro's behavior regarding hugs.
By the time the trio reached the children's museum, Wanda was jumpy enough that she immediately wanted to bolt out of the car, but she stayed quiet about that. If her teammates wanted her to stay put, she did not want to say she wanted to get out because she was nervous. This is fine. I said I was ready and I can do this. Wanda studied the pictures of their two targets Yelena showed her closely; she could always alert her friends if she spied either of them outside.
"You want to come inside or wait here and let Yelena and me handle it?" Natasha asked, turning to face Wanda. "Either is fine."
"She should stake out the parking lot," Yelena suggested. "Less people for her and more eyes out here is good."
Wanda thought this seemed okay, so she nodded. "I can do that." With this settled, they made sure their earpieces were functioning properly and then decided on the large ant metal sculptures out front as a meeting spot assuming everything went smoothly. Wanda watched her friends head inside, feeling content at the moment despite not liking being on her own. Natasha and Yelena willing to include her and trusting her to do something while understanding she still wasn't really up to snuff for missions was nice and made warm fuzzies settle in her chest.
She could hear her teammates making small talk over her earpiece for several minutes and then Nat telling someone she presumed was at the front desk or something similar, "Hi, just wondering if my friend Polina is working today? I'd like to see her." Of course, they knew Polina was, in fact, working today, but they didn't have a child to bring along either. Three young women looked less suspicious than three young men, but still.
Wanda was a bit disturbed trying to mull over why Dreykov had sent Polina here of all places. What were Polina and Makenzie alias Marta supposed to be doing? Looking for more poor hapless young girls to swipe for the Red Room? Assassinate some staff member or guest? I don't want to think about it. Pietro would have loved coming here to this museum though, even when they were teenagers; she was sure of it.
She decided if someone did ask what she was doing wandering about outdoors, she would say she was looking for her little brother. Pietro would be simultaneously pleased (to be included in her cover story even though he could not be there with her) and grumpy (to be called her little brother) if he could hear her say that now.
Wanda heard a door open and shut over her earpiece and then the sounds of a short scuffle. The noises echoed somewhat, and Wanda suspected her friends had successfully cornered Polina in an office or bathroom.
"...What do you mean, Dreykov is dead?" That voice must have been Polina, who sounded dazed. Wanda assumed Nat and Yelena had successfully given Polina the antidote, but Polina sounded suspicious and angry. "You stay away from me. Just...get...away. I have...work..."
"Polina, we aren't forcing you to do anything. We just want to help," Natasha said quietly. "You are free. Free to choose what you want to do now."
"You were assigned to work with a younger widow going by Marta," Yelena added. "We'd like to give her the mind-control antidote too."
Wanda flinched at more fighting sounds and then Polina hissing that she didn't know any Marta, she recognized Natasha as the infamous Black Widow, and if they bothered her further, she would turn Nat in to the "shitty American government", as she put it. A door slammed. In a second, Wanda heard a low, "Lina, she is heading outside. Stall her, please. You can do it. If we can avoid making a scene in front of others, I'd prefer that," from Nat. Wanda tensed, realizing she was not going to just be milling about outside observing. She touched her sore elbow and watched a strangely unruffled woman that appeared around Melina's age that she recognized from Polina's picture striding toward her car. Wanda cautiously followed her.
Speak up, Wanda. You can do this. “Excuse me? I'm looking for someone. Can you help me?" Wanda knew she sounded somewhat shaky, but she hoped she just sounded like a nervous sibling and nothing more.
Polina stopped and sighed. She reminded Wanda a bit of her old childhood friend Olia because she had wavy caramel hair too, though Polina had hers in a Dutch braid down the back of her head into a low ponytail. "Sorry, what did you need? I'm in a hurry."
Wanda blurted out a description of Pietro when he had been a little kid. Pietro would probably smack her for that and give her a hug if he was still there with her.
"...Haven't seen anyone like that, but I'll keep an eye out," Polina said, and then studied Wanda closer. In a second she had grabbed her by the arm, thankfully not the sore one, and pressed her firmly against the car. "You are not looking for anyone. You are the other female Avenger, the Sokovian refugee. What do you want?"
Wanda saw no point in trying to claim she wasn't who Polina already knew she was, and while now it didn't matter if Polina saw her use her enhancements, she also didn't want this woman shouting her identity to the public in the area either. "Polina, you met my friends already," she said carefully. "Maybe you...knew them before, in the Red Room. I don't know. Yelena was trapped under mind control too. We just want to help free the others."
"What do you care? You and Natasha are fugitives anyway. You did your good deed. Now leave me the hell alone."
Wanda hesitated, her fist held out ready to use the borrowed widow bites. Polina raised an eyebrow and didn't react further; Wanda knew the woman did not find her behavior a threat whatsoever, which was frustrating even though she didn't want to scare Polina, either. "I care because I don't want to leave any more girls hurting and scared if I can help them. I can't leave you alone because we know you know Makenzie. She's been missing for a week. I know this, and I think you can lead us to her." Wanda yelped when Polina abruptly shoved her into the car before sliding in herself and locking the doors all in the span of a few seconds. It's fine. Nat and Yelena will be coming. I don't have to be scared of the car.
Wanda realized she was far more anxious about being in the damn car without a trusted friend than the fact she was with a stranger capable of killing her in a second if she didn't use her magic to defend herself.
"Talk," Polina demanded. "I don't know any Makenzie. Your friends said they were looking for someone named Marta." Polina seemed more intrigued than angry now, and Wanda sensed there was something Polina was genuinely scared of beneath her cautious curiosity.
And it's not me, oddly enough, Wanda thought. "Marta is Makenzie," she said softly. "She may not even remember, but that is her real name."
Polina stared at Wanda, her dark eyes churning with both fear and anger. "What do you want? How do I know Dreykov is even dead? He could have done something to all three of you to make you say that, if he wants something."
Wanda gazed at her steadily and tried to keep her hands from shaking. "I can call Melina Vostokoff and she'll put Antonia Dreykov on the phone, and she can confirm for you."
Polina barked a laugh. "You think I'd trust Melina? I'd trust you or Yelena before I trust that woman," she spat bitterly. "Natasha was lucky. She got out. Cost the rest of us, though. Do you know how many times I was cycled through training before put under that..." she trailed off. "Get out. Just get out. You don't belong here. You're armed with Widow equipment and you didn't even use any of it, let alone your own abilities. Go disappear somewhere and have a vacation, enhanced."
Taken aback, Wanda blinked and hesitantly opened the door. Polina didn't move, just watched her. In her ear, Nat was assuring her she was doing fine and keep trying unless she felt unsafe.
Wanda did not feel unsafe. She felt lost and anxious about saying the wrong thing. "Polina, I...I know I can't know what being in the Red Room was like, but I do know what...scared and angry feels like," she whispered.
"You don't know anything. Get out of here, little girl, and stop playing at things you don't understand."
"My family is all dead, I was experimented on by neo-Nazi terrorists, and I’ve been tortured in that damn underwater prison. Don't you dare tell me I don't understand anything!" Wanda immediately cringed and turned away, half expecting Polina to hit her or literally shove her out the open car door, but she was laughing, much to Wanda's utter surprise. I don't understand. I have no right to say such awful things.
"You go, Wanda," Yelena said in her earpiece, and then from Nat, "I'm so glad you just said that. Good for you."
"You are a strange girl, Wanda Maximoff. Perhaps I believe you. What do you want with Marta?" Polina asked.
"I want to give her the antidote. I want to take you and your friend back to Melina's house with us so we can get you back to your families and set up a new life." Wanda was still tense, and she twisted her fingers together nervously, but her words managed to sound more confident than she felt.
Polina studied Wanda again, her eyes glassy with tears. "Marta is not my friend."
"But, you are protecting her."
"I want nothing to do with Vostakoff."
It took Wanda a moment to remember Polina just meant Melina. "Melina is trying to help. She-"
"No, little Avenger. Do not defend that woman. You don't..." Polina trailed off, appearing to rethink her words. "You can't know," she said quietly. "Why would you? You've just seen her playing family with the Red Guardian again, I assume. Rumors reached here."
Wanda thought of the Melina she knew, the one that had instantly been willing to have her in her house, the one that willingly checked her arm and cooked all of them food, and was kind to her when she was scared. And she thought of Melina's comment that Wanda didn't know what Melina had done, so don't make her sound innocent and only blame Alexei. Before she could say anything, Polina spoke again.
"Did she tell you her precious Red Guardian only drew his line at not raping the literal children he helped traffic? He's an idiot. Did he think refusing himself kept any of us safe from that? I think he genuinely did. I heard he was thrown in a gulag. Dreykov probably just tired of him because he criticized the government or something and disposed of him. She loves a shitty abuser, Wanda. I don't care what she loves, if he makes her happy, then fine. But I am not going to her house, and I will not take Marta there so she can be exposed to them too."
Wanda squeezed her hands into fists and was now quite certain Polina hated Alexei far more than she did Melina. "Can we at least give Marta...Makenzie...the antidote?" she asked softly. I'm sorry. I don't know what else to do.
Polina didn't answer. Nat had given Wanda an antidote to carry herself, and now she slid out of the car and just left the little vial on the seat. "Please...please don't report us," Wanda whispered again, and turned to walk away. "I left the antidote for you."
"Wait. Get your teammates over here. Please. I know you're wearing an earpiece."
Wanda smiled a bit and nodded; she could hear Nat saying they were coming in her ear. "They are coming right over. Thank you for trusting us to help."
Polina climbed back out of her car and studied Natasha and then Yelena as they walked over. "I hid Marta," she said bluntly.
Nat frowned. "You hid her? Why?"
"How did you have the agency to do such a thing?" Yelena asked.
Polina's dark eyes glinted at that. "She is my responsibility. She is a cover...a trained one, trusted backup, but a cover. Mothers protect their children, yes? I do not know if I love her, but she's mine and I will protect her. I want to protect her." She seemed to be unsure how to answer further, and she spoke directly to Yelena. "You know what Dreykov's mind control is like...tell them."
Yelena ran a hand across her eyes and sighed. "She means she herself knows she cares for the younger widow and that whatever she was assigned- ordered- to do meant choosing to hide her didn't break the assignment. So, she could decide to hide Marta-Makenzie," she explained. "She probably has an assignment involving a mother and child alias. Protecting Marta would fall under satisfying that role. But, Polina, why hide her? She's been trained herself, and if you're hiding her, she cannot be technically doing whatever job you were stationed here for."
"She physically can't," Polina said in a flat voice. "We both thought Dreykov would force one of us to kill her, but it's been over a week and nothing has happened."
Yelena easily put two and two together. "You mean she's sick or injured. Also, Dreykov didn't make one of you kill her, because he's dead. We told you he's dead. Good riddance."
Polina stared back at Yelena, nodding. "Both."
Wanda's hand flitted to her arm on instinct. Nat took care of me when I was hurt too badly to do anything too. She didn't leave me behind or kill me. "Maybe giving her the antidote will help her feel better. We can help."
Polina continued ignoring Nat and Wanda, speaking directly to Yelena. "Our handler stabbed her after she fell from a building during a stakeout. I've left her in a room at the Terijoki Resort Hotel near Zolotoy Beach."
"No offense, but if she's still under, she'll get out," Yelena stated. "What did you do, leave her cuffed to the bed?"
"Yes. Took all weapons away. We were- I think- hoping that would delay the inevitable. I've been slipping away there once a day to check on her. Something is wrong, but she couldn't tell me anything."
Wanda wasn't sure why, but she sensed an undercurrent of terror from Yelena, which made a knot settle in her own stomach. Yelena did not outwardly show any sign she was frightened, but something was bothering her. "Polina, your handler has to know Marta is still alive simply because you've been checking on her. He would know whatever he stabbed her with didn't kill her. Please, we need to get her out of that hotel. I don't know why he wouldn't just finish the job, but..." Yelena glanced at her sister, who also looked vaguely disturbed. "You don't have to go to Melina's if you don't want to. But we do need to get both of you somewhere else safe. We'll kill this man and if you know any more of the traffickers, I will personally help you assassinate them too."
Natasha did not correct this comment at all and say they wouldn't do that, and Wanda had a distinct impression something had flown over her head. And then Nat had her arm around her and taken her off to the side, away from Yelena and Polina. "Wanda, if you want me to take you back to Melina's before we go help this girl, I will," Natasha told her.
"What are you not telling me? What's wrong? We knew this might not be as simple as just taking Polina and Makenzie back to Melina's," Wanda pointed out, and then the truth crashed into her, because Nat was just silently staring at her and waiting for her to put it together. I know. I know exactly what the problem is. "This handler person is probably abusing Makenzie and making her not tell Polina about it."
"That's a nice way of putting it. Wanda, I...trust you. I know you can help, but I don't want you exposed to more of the ugliness of what the Red Room was like if I can help it. I don't know what we're going to find, but it won't be pretty." Nat paused and then added, "Moreover, I will not tell them not to kill this man. If that puts another mark in my ledger, I don't care."
Wanda hugged her friend tightly, hating the hurt in Nat's eyes and the fact she was sure Nat did care about assassinating this man, even if she pretended not to. "No. No, I'm staying. Nat, I...it's okay. I'm not judging killing this man one bit. I will get rid of him myself if he's hurting Makenzie. I don't care if she's 'trained', she's just a child." Somehow this did not feel the same to her as the idea of eliminating Ross; for one thing Makenzie was not a powerful enhanced person, and also she was safely far away from that man now. Poor Makenzie was probably being hurt now, and besides, as horrible as the Raft had been for her, Wanda felt a bitter sense of luck that she'd at least escaped that sort of assault. She could remember a very concerned Nat specifically asking her about it in the Norway safe house right after the rescue and her friend saying she was glad that hadn't happened to her. I'm safe here. Polina and Makenzie are not. And I have friends willing to take care of me. Makenzie must be terrified. I feel like I have no right to be scared at all. "Nat, I don't want you to be hurting, either. I'll stay, and you don't even have to go in this hotel if you don't want to. I...I need you to talk to me over the comms, because I know I might fall apart and be useless otherwise, but I can go in with them."
Nat seemed ready to argue, but instead she squeezed Wanda's hand and merely nodded. "Right, then. You're coming."
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It turned out this hotel wasn't far from the beach, and Wanda found herself growing antsy. Polina would not talk to her or Natasha, just Yelena, and the older widow still seemed angry and frightened. Late afternoon sunlight shone across the resort building, and Wanda sighed.
"I'll go in with Polina," Yelena announced. "Natasha, you and Wanda stay here. Better to keep you two out, just in case, if Wanda won't erase people's memories if she’s recognized."
The extraction idea set again, Wanda scooted closer to Natasha the second their other two companions disappeared inside. Nat appeared to be fine, but Wanda sensed sadness and a hint of anger from her all the same. Her friend was not scared, but she put an arm around Wanda and she seemed tense. "You took care of me," Wanda whispered. "So I know you will help take care of Makenzie also. And if she is badly hurt to the point we can't take care of her, it's safe for her to go to a hospital, at least. Maybe she's not scared of hospitals like me."
This made Nat smile and nod. They heard Yelena and Polina making vague innocent small talk as they evidently walked through the hotel smoothly, making their way to whatever room Polina had hidden the younger widow. And then they heard Polina scream and a singular silenced gunshot. Wanda tensed, bits of scarlet hazing her hands and feeling tempted to bolt inside, but Natasha held her still. "Not yet. Yelena will alert us if we need to do something."
Wanda fidgeted nervously and clasped her hands in her lap. It feels weird that I can do that properly again, she thought absently; her left arm still felt sore and stiff, but that was unimportant right now. This is fine. They'll get Makenzie out. It's fine.
It was not fine. "Natasha, I don't know how to get Marta out of here." Yelena's angry voice sounded crackly over their comms. "She's...a problem."
Wanda could hear muffled whimpering and crying, and then a male voice ordering 'shut up', and then another silenced shot.
"There. He cannot hurt us any more," Yelena said matter-of-factly.
The male voice shut up. The pained crying continued.
Wanda was very sure this handler person had been the one in the room and had been there because he'd thought Polina was at her Ant Museum job. She chewed at a fingernail and looked to Nat for direction.
"I brought Marta in through the balcony at night on my back," Polina said. "I can't get her to calm down now."
"Should've waited to give her the antidote," Yelena muttered, which sounded horrible but was probably true. "Hey. Can't Wanda do something? It's either that or we're going to have to knock her out."
Surely that wouldn't be wrong? Wanda knew she sounded shaky, but she nodded to herself. "I can. Where do you want me?"
_________________
Wanda made it to the room Yelena directed her to with no problem. In her ear, Natasha made sure to let her know she was driving around the side of the hotel so they could pile back into the vehicle and get away from the vicinity easily. I can do this, she reminded herself. I said I could, and I will. Yelena immediately pulled her into the room and locked the door the second she knocked lightly. "It's just Lina," she said aloud. Wanda stared at the dead man slumped against the wall. "Um..."
Yelena spun her around firmly. "Ignore the trash. I just want you to try talking to Marta. If she can't listen, you make her sleep until we can get out of here. We need to leave before someone else comes and gets suspicious. Like I told you while you were walking up here, don't use her real name right now. Just call her Marta."
"Okay." That I can do. I can talk to another scared girl. She is not going to care if I stumble over my words or don't express myself clearly. Wanda bit her lip and ducked into the bathroom where Polina had a shaking young teenager pinned against the wall. The girl struggled further when she saw Wanda, but she did not scream. Squeezing her own eyes shut, Wanda reached out to touch the girl's hand and tried to send her something else, something of her own that was not intruding on this girl's privacy.
A bright summer sky.
A quiet rippling lake.
A girl scattering ashes in the lake with her friend and then silently eating a piece of chocolate, because her lost other half loved chocolate and she thought it would make him happy.
A lost girl instead of a lost boy, curled up on a bed crying after her friend had saved her.
The friend taking the girl to a farm to heal.
"It is okay. It is just not okay right away. Polina loves you. She just doesn't know it yet. You are safe now. Safe. Safe."
Wanda bit her lip and pulled the mental images back, suddenly realizing she'd used more of her own memories to share than she had meant to. The child seemed to crumple, and drooped against the wall. Wanda clasped the girl's hand in hers and held on tightly.
"Is he gone?"
"The bad man is dead, Marta," Wanda assured her. Polina stopped pinning her companion so firmly and let her fall against Wanda.
"What did you do?" Polina asked quietly.
"Showed her pained sad memories of mine when someone helped me. I didn't want to...make her do anything. I thought this was better." Wanda still didn't know what she was doing, but all the fight seemed to have drained out of the girl she was holding, at least for now. With Marta-Makenzie resting against her, she could see why Yelena had been so concerned. There was a bandage over one eye, her wrists were rubbed raw (Wanda suspected this was from being kept restrained for a week), one leg didn't look quite right either, and her plain activewear outfit seemed a bit disheveled. But none of it seemed like something deadly that couldn't be cared for. If she'd been at the Compound, Wanda would have assumed they would just take her to the medbay and she'd heal after awhile.
Polina stared at Wanda for a few interminable seconds and finally just nodded. "Marta, these girls are going to help us," she informed the younger widow. "Dreykov is dead. He cannot control us anymore."
"I have another name. I think."
"You do. Makenzie."
"Don't want to be called it."
Polina frowned, not quite understanding why her companion would not want to be called her real name. "Then you don't have to."
"Marta. For...now." Marta seemed to realize she was being held by a stranger and scrambled backwards, dragging the injured leg and feeling at her wrists for her own widow bites that were not there. Wanda removed one of her borrowed ones and offered it to the younger girl. Marta snatched it and then just stared at Wanda. "You are an enhanced. You are not another widow. You poked pictures in my head. They were not mine."
Wanda flinched, but Marta seemed more curious and frightened than mad. "I...did. I'm sorry. Those were my memories. I didn't know what to say."
"You're a twin," Marta said flatly. "He died. You tried to kill yourself. There is something wrong with you."
I know. Wanda tensed and said nothing for a few seconds. Marta's naturally red pigtail braids reminded Wanda of her own dyed-red hair, and Marta was scared and she made Wanda think of herself at fourteen. Nat's calming voice was in her earpiece saying she could probably get Marta to the car outside herself with her magic. Before Wanda could react, Yelena, who had also heard Nat's suggestion, pushed Polina aside and heaved a protesting Marta over her shoulder.
"Wanda's going to take you out of here, Marta. Wanda, you get over here. I'm surprised nobody's checked in here yet," Yelena said.
Wanda knew she could not carry Marta, who was all stocky muscle but shorter than Nat, and get them both to the ground safely. But Yelena seemed to have a plan; she quickly shredded a sheet into strips and tied the child to Wanda's back. Marta was clearly displeased and frightened, but she didn't fight, either. Instead she clung to Wanda's neck, which honestly really hurt, but Wanda closed her own eyes and said nothing. I am safe and I'm helping another girl feel better and get to safety, Wanda reminded herself.
"Coast is clear," Nat said. "You should be able to get down here without your magic being seen if you're quick. I'm right below that balcony."
Wanda did not really feel strong enough to carry Marta, but her magic could, and she was able to dump the two of them over the railing with Yelena's and Polina's help. Predictably Marta yelped, but Wanda felt herself floating safely, her hands hazed in scarlet again. "I'm good now," she assured Yelena. "The rest of me might not be physically strong enough for this, but my magic is."
In a few seconds Wanda had lowered herself and Marta to the ground safely, much faster than Polina had probably gotten her up to the room in the first place. "Are you okay?" she whispered.
"No," Marta said, "but that is not your fault." Marta seemed too warm and Wanda wondered if she had a fever.
Spotting the two girls, Natasha quickly bundled both of them into their vehicle without preamble, stuffing both into the backseat before helping untie Marta from Wanda's back. "I've got these two," Nat said over the comms to Yelena. "They're safe."
"Great. Can you just...get them away from here? Let's meet back at the Ant Museum and regroup. Polina and I need to...clean up in here a little."
"Of course."
"I'm turning my comms off."
Nat was quite sure Yelena was trying to protect Wanda and Marta from whatever 'cleanup' she and Polina were doing, but she didn't argue. "All right. See you soon."
________________
"Give Marta an Advil and then see what you can do for her while I drive," Nat ordered. "There's some basic first aid supplies under the seat."
"Okay." Wanda pulled her own hoodie off and tried to settle Marta against the window using the hoodie as a pillow, but the girl stiffened and wouldn't move. "Will you let me help? Please?"
Marta hesitated but nodded after a moment. Then she winced, as if the motion had hurt. In a second, the pained expression was gone as if it had never been there.
Wanda tugged her light scarf off too, thinking that perhaps Marta seeing the mostly healed burns there might help. "I won't touch you if you don't want me to. Maybe you could tell me what hurts and I'll see what supplies we have so you can take care of it yourself?" Please believe me. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
"I want Polina, please. I think I tried to kill her for locking me in the resort room. I wasn't doing my assignment."
"That was not your fault. Polina is okay. She's helping clean up that room and we'll see her soon," Wanda assured her. Marta seemed to be very interested in the elastic bandage on her elbow, and while she really didn't want it touched, she let Marta be anyway. At least the girl wasn't screaming or trying to attack her; that seemed like a good sign.
Marta did not say anything, just left Wanda's arm alone after a minute or two and sat very still.
"Marta, you need to let Wanda help you. She is not going to hurt you," Nat ordered kindly but firmly from the front seat.
"Why?"
"Because you're injured and we don't discard injured people here. You know Polina tried to take care of you as much as she could."
Marta eyed Wanda again. "She has burns. Why does she have burns?"
"Well, why don't you ask her?" Nat asked calmly.
Marta decided she did not want to, but she did rest her head against the window and pushed the hoodie back toward Wanda, who understood that reaction easily. Instead of trying to make Marta accept it, she just said, "If you change your mind, I will share it," feeling certain Marta would not ask for it at all, because she knew she wouldn't either. "May I try to help now? Please?"
"Fine."
Wanda decided to start with taking care of the raw skin on Marta's wrists, because that was something she knew how to take care of and she figured that would be the least frightening thing for some strange girl Marta didn't know to touch. "Do you like music?" Wanda asked hesitantly. Music helps me calm down. Maybe it would help Marta too.
"Don't know."
"Sure you do," Nat said from the front seat. "You probably don't know what kind of music you like."
Marta appeared to be considering this. Then she whispered, "The Love Yourself song that is on the radio often. Polina left the radio on a lot."
Wanda wrinkled her nose and looked very unimpressed. In the front seat, Natasha sounded like she was trying very hard not to laugh. "Okay, well, perhaps Wanda will pull that up on Spotify for you. You can listen to whatever you like if you let her help you."
Wanda absolutely did not want to listen to that song, which she hated, so she offered Marta her earbuds instead. Marta seemed to be more or less calm now, but Wanda was growing more and more worried the more she checked the younger girl over. Marta's wrists looked sore but obviously nothing serious, but Wanda didn't know what to do with a clearly broken leg (or ankle, she wasn't sure) without more supplies. The girl appearing not to react much when Wanda looked at it and told Nat what she knew concerned her, and also Polina had said their handler had stabbed Marta. That was clearly not the injured leg, and Marta didn't seem injured anywhere else other than some bruises, except for the already bandaged eye. "Marta, where did that man stab you?" Wanda asked finally.
Marta looked at her like she thought Wanda was dumb. Then she pointed at her face and said nothing.
"Nat. Nat, that disgusting pig stabbed her in the eye," Wanda reported in her calm-angry voice. Suddenly Wanda wished she had shredded that man. No wonder Polina or Yelena had killed him. Marta did let her put a new bandage over the damaged eye, but Wanda had no idea what to do with something like that either, other than to cover it with something clean. It was obvious Polina had also done her best to take care of it, but Wanda was very sure there was nothing for anyone to do to really fix it.
"That is not all," Marta said flatly, but she shifted a bit and used Wanda's shoulder as a pillow instead. "Where is D? Can I burn him? I will make it look like an accident."
"He's already dead. Polina and Yelena will dispose of him," Natasha told her. Glancing in the rearview mirror at the girls, she sighed. "Wanda, just...give her some water and keep her comfortable for now. We're going to have to either take her to Melina's or a hospital. Both of you are doing just fine."
The rest of the drive back to the museum went smoothly. Wanda did not hug Marta since she didn't want to be hugged, but she did let the young ex-widow use her as a pillow and rest awkwardly stretched across the backseat. Marta still seemed shivery and she did have a low fever, so Wanda draped the unwanted hoodie over her. "Safe now," she assured Marta several times over. I'm glad I came, but I hate this. This is not fair. Marta didn't do anything. She's just a kid. I would have hated being thought of as a kid at fourteen, so I won't tell her that, but...
" 'Kay."
Notes:
Yes, Marta has heard that Justin Bieber song and liked it. It’s 2016 after all. And yes, Wanda hates it and Nat finds both of them funny.:)
Any feedback is much appreciated<3
Chapter 26: Chapter 26
Summary:
In which Wanda stays with Marta for a bit until the group can take Marta to a hospital safely, and the group tentatively decides what to do next.
Notes:
Oh look, a chapter! I hope you enjoy:)
TW as per previous: Marta is obviously safe now, but references to general Red Room nastiness, especially considering she’s been sexually assaulted and she’s also a 14yr old kid, trained or not. (And seeing her now makes Nat upset, so.)
I have gotten rather attached to Marta already and I’m looking forward to writing where she goes next!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"How long will it take for Yelena and Polina to get back here?" Wanda asked once she, Nat, and Marta had arrived back at the museum parking lot. By now it was dusk, and Wanda could tell Marta was forcing herself not to fall asleep. "It's okay to sleep, Marta," she assured the injured ex-widow. "Maybe it isn't completely safe here, but I will defend us and so will Nat."
"I'm not sure, but we'll be all right for a little while. We just need to go get help for Marta, but she's safe and clearly stable for now, so waiting a bit should be fine." Nat would have preferred to take Marta straight to a hospital, but that was one of the absolute worst places for Wanda or herself to be in at the moment, and risking Marta's safety on top of their own made that even worse.
"Are you taking me to a hospital?" Marta asked suspiciously. "You will probably get reported, even here."
Natasha sighed and turned around so she could see Marta and Wanda. "We have to. You have a slight fever, we need to make sure your leg is taken care of properly, and I don't feel confident we can take care of your eye on our own. And we need to make sure you aren't...sick from anything else."
"I can't have a baby."
Now Nat looked angry. "Obviously not. You are a baby," she muttered.
Wanda thought Marta would be mad at being referred to as such, but the girl only shifted herself closer to Wanda and looked like she might cry. Unsure if Marta wanted to be touched or not, Wanda carefully rested her hand on Marta's shoulder and gave her a slight squeeze. "It's safe to cry here," Wanda whispered. Marta's passive aura was all smushed fear and pain with a sprinkling of violent anger on top, and Wanda tried her best not to sense anything further from her. I would hate knowing some random strange girl could sense exactly how I felt. I won't do that to her if I can help it.
Marta's head was very, very loud, much like Yelena's.
"Let's see the leg while we wait for Polina and Yelena to get here," Nat ordered in the same gentle but firm voice she often used with Wanda.
Wanda could tell Marta did not want Natasha to do that, but Marta didn't react beyond snatching the makeshift hoodie-blanket and squeezing it so tightly her knuckles turned white. Then she muttered, "Marble, marble, marble," over and over, which made Nat herself abruptly sit back in the driver's seat facing away from the two girls. "Tell your friend I am fine," Marta said flatly. "My fault, anyway. I fell."
Before Wanda could react, Nat was out of the car and making Marta sit up instead of using Wanda's lap as a pillow. "You stay still. None of this was your fault, do you understand? Wanda, don't use your bad arm for this, but I need you to hold her. Marta, you keep your hands off her arm. You are not allowed to attack her."
"I don't want to attack her."
"I know. I also know it is very, very tempting to do so if someone is actively holding you down while you're in pain." Nat seemed frustrated; there really wasn't enough room and there weren't enough supplies with them, either. "Marta, are you able to remember where you and Polina were living for the duration of your assignment in this area?"
"Oh yes. Lavallahutor...little holiday house. It would be really nice if D was not in it," Marta said. "I think, that I hate him. I hope Polina throws him away. In pieces. Many, many small pieces." She sounded quite satisfied with this idea.
Nat ignored the 'cutting up D into many small pieces' comment. "We're going to go there for now. Wanda, call Yelena and tell her."
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The holiday house was indeed nice in Wanda's opinion. It was much, much smaller than Tony's vacation house in New York- Wanda thought at least a good ten of this cozy place could fit in Tony's huge one- but it was bright and airy while still being small. Nat picked Marta up and simply carried her inside easily, which made Wanda feel a bit embarrassed that she wasn't strong enough to do such a thing. Even Marta seemed entertained; her good eye sparkled as she commented, "Wanda, you are really weird, but I think I like you." She drooped in Natasha's arms and wrapped her own arms around Nat's neck. "I don't understand why fugitive Avengers are helping free girls from the Red Room, but thank you. I don't remember much from before that at all and I don't think I want to. I think..." she trailed off.
Nat gently laid Marta down on one of the beds in the low-ceilinged room Marta directed them to. "You don't have to. I do know you were not born Russian. You have family in the States. There's an aunt and uncle in New Jersey that would love to have you."
Marta hesitated; she glanced at Wanda and then back at Natasha. "Why should I want to go there? Someone got rid of me," she said in slow, careful English. "It is not mine any more."
"You don't have to. We'll help you find a place anywhere you want," Natasha said firmly. "I don't know if you were kidnapped or given away or sold, but you are not going anywhere to live you don't want to. If you don't want to go live with your relatives, then we will find somewhere else safe for you."
Marta closed her eye and turned her head away slowly. "I think my mother did it," she whispered. "I don't know, but I think she got rid of me."
Wanda hadn't particularly thought about it, but she realized none of them including herself had spoken anything but Russian all throughout the rescue until now. Of course Marta would say she didn't want to go. Why wouldn't she? She had very little memory of her life before the Red Room. At least I can remember my family, and I know my parents loved Pietro and me to bits. Wanda held Marta's hand while Nat looked for the extra supplies Marta claimed were in the bathroom.
"Do you have parents?" Marta asked. "And are they nice?"
"Mine died when I was ten," Wanda said quietly, "but yes, they were very nice. I love them very much."
"I don't remember having a dad, but I really, really think my mother got rid of me," Marta told her, "so I don't want her. She is not going to want me now if she didn't want me then." Then she added, "Your friend is not going to find supplies to treat a broken leg in the bathroom. She should know that. I was supposed to die. I just meant there was a small first-aid kit in there."
Wanda was quite sure Nat did know that and needed a minute to herself. "You don't have to pretend to be fine any more. Can I at least get you some ice or something?"
"No, I want to hear more music," Marta said. "Can I hear a song you like? Also. How old are you? How did you get injured?"
Wanda's hand instinctively flitted to her neck. "Yes, I am nineteen, and...in that underwater Raft prison. But I am better now." Mostly. I'm so tired. I feel like I'm going to pass out or something. I don't want to fall asleep or faint and leave Marta alone. She's pretending otherwise but I think she's still scared, and I know she's hurting. Though she knew Nat hadn't particularly wanted her exposed to the unpleasant reality of what was going on, she also knew quite well that man Marta referred to as D had not merely stabbed the girl. And Marta had not had a protective big brother or mysterious enhancements that scared people away there to protect her. "Do you, um...want to talk about anything?" Wanda asked awkwardly. "Nat always tries to make me talk if I am hurt."
"No. I want Polina. I decided I like you, but I don't want to talk about it to you." Marta did reach and hug Wanda all the same though; maybe a hug was all right. Wanda's memories made Marta more inclined to trust her. Wanda was not all that much older, and while she hadn't been in the Red Room, she was still hurt anyway. And she had willingly offered something personal that could have been used against her to a stranger because she'd wanted to help. Marta decided she should offer something personal herself to say thank-you. "I don't think D was trying to train me further for missions," she said flatly. "Because, you don't train useless assets you didn't kill. I don't remember everything clearly, but I know I hate him and he scared me."
Wanda's arms tightened around Marta, and she squeezed her eyes shut. This is not fair. I don't know what to do and I want to help. And how many more Martas are out there? "You are not useless. He can't hurt you anymore. He can't hurt anyone anymore." She jumped in surprise when Marta abruptly pulled away.
"We were under mind-control because we could have turned on our handlers." Almost immediately Marta's burst of energy seemed to drain out of her, and she collapsed back against the fluffy pillows. Wanda tugged the covers over the younger girl, being careful not to jostle her leg. "Your friend got out and she caused all kinds of trouble for Dreykov. So he must have been the scared one. They trained thousands of girls to be assassins. And then hurt us doing so."
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Natasha returned a few minutes later to find Marta staring up at the wooden ceiling, still refusing to sleep, the borrowed widow bite Wanda had given her on her wrist ready to use if necessary. A very tired Wanda was fast asleep holding Marta's other hand, her own head resting across her good arm. "There's nothing in the bathroom for-"
"You knew that," Marta interrupted quietly. "Or did you forget?"
"No, just...I'm so sorry we didn't get to you sooner. Polina and Yelena should be here soon. How would you feel about Polina taking you to the hospital and bringing you back here after?" Natasha sighed, half wishing she hadn't let Wanda come at all, because now she had made Wanda see more horrible things she shouldn't have had to witness. Then there was Marta, who was badly injured and pretending she was fine and refusing to sleep.
Marta considered this briefly. "I'd rather just stay right here."
"You can't. You may pick Polina or Yelena or both to take you to a hospital once they get here. Then you may choose between staying here or going back to Melina's house with Wanda and me. Those are the choices." Nat paused before continuing, "This does not mean you can't do as you please once you heal, but right now those are your options."
Marta looked at sleeping Wanda briefly. "She fell asleep," she said unnecessarily, "and that is dumb. I could have killed her even like this. Easy. She didn't even cuff me to the bed like we always did back...there."
Natasha sighed hearing this and a bit of her thought Wanda trusting an unknown widow like that to the point she fell asleep was, indeed, a very bad idea, but Wanda had just seen an injured young girl she immediately cared about very much, and only processed that. But Marta seemed happier along with being confused, and she had let Wanda hold her hand and fall asleep next to her without any issues. Wanda's brow looked slightly furrowed as she slept, but she seemed relaxed otherwise. "She's trusting you not to hurt her. Do you really want to harm her?"
"No. But I could."
"Well, Wanda could rip this building apart with her mind, and you are letting her touch your hand. Do you think that is dumb?"
Marta's gaze slowly moved to sleeping Wanda and then back to Natasha. "No. She's weird and I don't understand why she showed me some of her memories, but I have decided I like her. She seems like someone I would like to be friends with at school, if she was the same age and I went to school. Wanda hates that song she pulled up in the car for me, doesn't she? She just wanted to be nice."
This made Natasha smile. "Let's just say she listens to other things." She gave Wanda's shoulder a light squeeze, which instantly woke her up. "You can go back to sleep in a little while if you want to, but I'm going to go find some ice for Marta and buy food for all of us. I need you to watch her. Can you do that?"
"Yes," Wanda said agreeably. I shouldn't have fallen asleep in the first place.
"I don't need watching." Marta looked rather offended, but she also squeezed Wanda's hand. "We'll be fine. If someone bothers us before you come back, we can handle it."
Wanda suspected Marta's idea of 'handling' an intruder meant killing them, but she kept this to herself.
Natasha clearly thought the same, because she added, "If someone does bother you, no killing. You defend yourselves and that's it."
Marta looked straight at Natasha, her voice flat again. "If this supposed intruder recognizes Wanda, they might report her, yes? Why should I not kill them if they want to take her back to prison? She said that's where she got injured."
"Because we don't have to in order to keep me safe," Wanda said quickly. "I can defend myself and I have teammates willing to help. We want to use the least amount of force possible to make people leave us alone." I would kill someone that did horrible things to Marta in a second though. Is that bad? I don't...know.
"You didn't care that Yelena and Polina killed D," Marta pointed out.
"That's different."
"No it isn't."
"It is! They found that man already harming you and we are talking about someone maybe wanting to report me. That's not the same thing at all." Wanda glanced at Nat for backup on this, but her friend looked more frustrated than agreeable.
"Never mind her, Marta. The point is killing is a last resort. Wanda, take care of both of you. Yourself included. Understand?"
I know. "I understand. I won't let anyone hurt Marta more or take me back to that prison," Wanda assured her.
Natasha studied Wanda for a moment, deciding she trusted this. "All right."
________________
Once Nat was gone, Wanda immediately grew antsy again, pacing the bedroom until Marta said, "Pacing isn't going to make her come back any faster." Wanda perched herself on the other bed that she presumed had been Polina's. Marta slowly turned her head toward the older girl. "Do you think I should go live with some aunt and uncle I don't know?"
"I think you should meet them or at least talk to them before deciding, assuming they didn't have anything to do with you ending up in the Red Room." I don't know what I should tell her, but I believe that much. Wanda bit her lip and didn't say anything else.
"They might be nice people and just not want me."
"If they don't want you, then they are not nice people."
"I'm just saying. Maybe adopting some injured niece that's also killed people is too much to deal with, don't you think?"
Wanda scrunched her eyes shut and pulled her knees to her chest. "No. I think if they are nice, then they would want you no matter what. You deserve to be loved; you deserve to be cared for and not...not treated like a thing." I believe that for Marta. Why can't I believe it for me? What about those people in Lagos? I wasn't under mind control when that happened. Is it completely different? I don't know that either.
Mama and Papa would still want you, Wanda. You know that, Pietro's voice flitted through Wanda's head. They loved us so much. And they would want Marta too. It wouldn't matter what either of you did or didn't do.
"You don't believe that for you," Marta's voice cut into Wanda's thoughts.
"You might not either if you knew everything. Suppose I told you I could mind-control people, all by myself, no serum or tech or anything like that required." Wanda flexed her bad arm experimentally and decided if Nat brought back enough ice, she was going to borrow some herself. She had no intentions of telling her friend she suspected she had tried to do far too much too fast already; it was fine and it wasn't fair to poor Marta to be fussy about an unpleasantly achy arm when Marta was hurt far worse.
"I say you are stupid for not using it to escape from a place where you got those burns and hurt your arm." Marta winced, shifting uncomfortably on her bed so she could see Wanda better. "I think you need ice too. Ice is good, if you can get access to it," she commented.
"I'm fine."
"I mean, yes, you'd still be tossed into normal training, but I can still tell you aren't functioning at 100%. Why didn't you use your mind-control on me when you and the others got me out of the hotel instead of sharing some of your own memories?"
"Because at least what I did to you wasn't...controlling you. I just wanted you to know it was safe even if you were hurting. That it was okay to be scared or sad or in pain, but someone was there to help." Wanda was tempted to go back and sit next to Marta, but she wanted to make sure her young companion could still have some personal space, so she stayed put.
Marta was silent for a bit, mulling this over. Then she just said, "Well, I guess I will meet these relatives, but I want Polina there, and I want you there, because then you could tell me if they really want me or just think they have to."
"Okay."
The two of them simply rested in silence for a few minutes until they heard a sharp knock on the door. Both Wanda and Marta tensed and traded glances. "What if it's another Widow handler?" Marta whispered. "Someone to check on Polina and me because we aren't doing our, uh, jobs?"
Wanda's eyes glowed red briefly, which made Marta flinch. "We'll be fine. Stay here and you stun anyone that steps foot in here if it's not one of us. Not kill, but don't wait, stun them." She padded silently out of the little bedroom and down to the door. I can handle this. I will not open that door unless absolutely necessary; this place probably looks empty unless someone was watching us enter.
"I know you are in there. Answer the door. You must, please."
Wanda frowned, slightly weirded out by this. The voice sounded like it belonged to an older woman, confirmed by peeking out the keyhole. Either it's a nosy old lady or... Thoughts of the Madame B Nat had mentioned before plunked through her mind reluctantly. There was no way to know for sure and Wanda remembered Nat answering the door at the hotel in New York. Surely she should do the same now. Wanda pasted a pleasant smile on her face and opened the door a crack. "Hello. Can I help you with something?"
All pleasantness faded from the woman's expression, even though she still looked worried. "You are not Polina."
"No, I am not. I'm just Lina," Wanda said calmly. Give as little as possible. Less opportunity for holes to be poked in your story. “Is there a problem?"
"Well, Polina left work without notice and that's not like her at all. Where is she?"
"I'm not sure. I know she had some emergency to deal with," Wanda told the woman. She deeply wished Nat was there; making things up on the fly was not her best skill, even if she felt decently confident doing so.
"Her daughter has been missing. What's going on?" The lady frowned and tried to push her way past Wanda, whose stomach rolled over unpleasantly. Wanda held the door still firmly, scarlet hazing her palm behind the door so she was strong enough to prevent the door from budging further without letting her magic be visible to this woman. She was not going to let the nosy lady inside. "Why is this so hard to open...I always thought she was hiding something, but now I'm concerned. Why are you here, Lina?" The woman studied Wanda more closely, eyeing her neck.
Oh no. I knew I forgot something. A bit of Wanda felt glad that she felt well enough to have forgotten about the remaining marks on her neck and to conceal them if she wasn't safe with people that already knew her, but now she was mentally kicking herself for not simply covering it before answering the door.
Before Wanda could figure out what to say next, the woman went on, "Are you one of those brainwashed trained assassin girls that have been slowly being freed appearing around Russia in general?" She seemed concerned and curious, and Wanda wondered if agreeing with this would put Marta in danger. Nat would say to go along with it. This lady is clearly nosy, but she's worried, not angry. Better she thinks Marta and Polina have an extra ex-Widow around than the fugitive enhanced refugee girl Avenger.
"Yes," Wanda agreed, speaking loudly so Marta would hear her, "and I know Polina's daughter."
"Oh, I'm sorry. That must have been horrible," the woman said. "Maybe I should take you to the hospital right now myself and-"
"No, no, I'm fine," Wanda interrupted quickly, now quite certain this woman was also dumb along with being nosy, because even if she didn't want to see the mostly healed burn marks on her neck, she knew objectively that they didn't look that bad anymore. Also, it seemed silly that merely saying Polina had an emergency and some visible burns on her own skin would make a stranger assume she was one of the girls from the Red Room. I didn't read her mind. What if she is associated with the Red Room herself? Something isn't right. I don't sense any malice on top, but... "Please, I'm cooking something and I don't want it to burn. Thank you for checking. I will let Polina know you stopped by." Wanda closed the door firmly and then locked it, leaning against the door and trying to stay calm. I can still feel that woman outside. What do I do?
She scrambled back to Marta, who was sitting up now, her expression screwed up in pain. "Don't, don't get up, Marta. It'll be okay," she whispered. "I locked the door."
"I don't think so," Marta said, and pulled herself to stand leaning on Wanda before the older girl could react. "Hiding me makes this worse for you, because there's no reason you wouldn't take me anywhere if you weren't a fugitive, right?"
The girls flinched at another loud knock. Wanda tried to hold Marta, but resorted to simply using her magic to support her instead. Marta squeaked but didn't particularly react otherwise; Wanda was surprised the young ex-Widow didn't attempt pulling herself away or something. "I can't hold you without using my powers, but if you want me to stop, please tell me. You need to stay here and lie down. Nat told me to take care of you," Wanda said firmly. "Stay still, please. I'm going to call Nat and ask her what she'd rather us do. I trust her judgement more than mine or yours."
Marta gave her a dubious look, but she mumbled a quiet okay and let Wanda settle her back on the bed.
"...Nat? I'm sorry to bother you." Wanda quickly told Nat what had happened and asked what she and Marta should do in the meantime.
"Stay inside. If this nosy person already thinks you're one of the girls from the Red Room, she's not going to jump to thinking who you really are. She'll probably think you were rude to her, but that's it. Frankly that doesn't sound like a handler at all." Natasha paused before adding, "And don't let Marta get up, period. You make her stay put if you have to."
Wanda glanced at Marta, who was just lying very still and watching her. "I will take care of her."
"Wanda. I mean it. Don't let her get up. I'll be back in about fifteen minutes."
With the call ended, Wanda went back to sitting perched on the edge of the other bed. The knocking faded and Wanda finally let herself relax a bit. They heard a, "I'll bring some food tomorrow. I hope you're safe," and then a car driving away. Marta closed her eye and looked like she was trying to actually rest finally.
"The woman probably really was a random person," Marta reasoned quietly, "because no offense, but you would never fool some Red Room handler that you're a widow. So."
"That is true. She also probably would have pressed further and not said she'd bring us food, either." And that's why I called Nat. I don't care what kind of abusive training poor Marta went through, she's still just a kid. And I don't...trust me. I suppose I could have read that woman's mind, but that felt wrong. Wanda stood up and went to stand in the doorway instead so she wouldn't feel so much like she was about to fall asleep.
By the time Nat returned, Wanda was only too ready to relinquish her guard role; she was exhausted and her arm ached and she wanted to take a nap. "Marta is safe," Wanda reported. "She's not asleep, but she's resting."
Natasha took one look at Wanda and sent her to lie down herself. "Go lie down for awhile. Take one of the ice packs for your arm. I'll take care of Marta since Yelena and Polina still aren't here yet."
"But-"
"No buts. I know exactly what you are going to say and it's nonsense. Do you think we ignored Scott's injured arm after the Raft rescue just because you were hurt much worse than he was?" Nat looked straight at Wanda, hoping she would understand.
No, of course not. Wanda shook her head. Though she couldn't remember her teammates taking care of her injuries on the quinjet immediately after the rescue since she had passed out and didn't wake up until after, she knew quite well they had made sure everyone was tended to, not just her. Nat probably took care of me herself and told one of the others to take care of Scott. I'm sure of it. She took the ice pack Nat offered her and curled up on the other bed as instructed. It did help; almost immediately she didn't feel quite so lightheaded.
"Now you stay there. I know I said you could help with this mission, and you have. For now, you've done enough. Go to sleep. I'll wake you up if I need backup." Satisfied that Wanda was indeed listening and would stay put, Natasha turned her attention back to Marta.
___________________
Wanda woke up sometime later to Natasha quietly offering her some tea and a grilled cheese sandwich. "Where's Marta? Is she okay? I didn't mean to sleep so long-"
"She's safe at the hospital with Yelena. Marta is safer there with her than if either of us went with her. Polina is here taking a shower and then she's going straight back to the hospital. You needed to sleep. It's fine. It's almost midnight by now."
Wanda noticed that Nat had not said Marta was okay; she had said Marta was safe, which was not the same thing. "Marta isn't okay, is she?" She did nibble at the sandwich, but mostly she just felt thirsty and sipped the hot tea.
Natasha hesitated for a minute before answering, which made Wanda more concerned rather than less. "She's going to be okay. It will just take awhile," she said finally. "I asked Yelena to send us updates. Marta needed surgery on her leg and to remove that eye, but it sounded like everything went smoothly. They want to keep her at the hospital for a day or two just in case, but she'll be fine."
"Why can't they fix her eye?" Now Wanda sounded angry rather than worried. "That isn't fair."
"Wanda, I know you knew that's exactly what was going to happen. Marta knew it herself. She was not going to be able to see out of it again anyway, and it was damaged enough that if it was left alone, it would make her seriously ill or kill her eventually." Nat sounded angry herself as she sat down next to Wanda. "She'll be okay, she's safe and that disgusting handler she and Polina were stuck with can't hurt her any further."
"I'm glad he's dead."
"Well, I won't disagree with that. Frankly if he had done something like that when I was there, I can guarantee one of the girls in my...batch of sorts, would have killed him since we weren't under mind control back then, and she wouldn't be punished for it simply because he wasn't following orders either. He was supposed to kill Marta once she was of no use as a widow any longer, not selfishly let Polina believe she'd hidden her safely so he could just...assault her when he pleased. If Dreykov was still alive, he would have had both of them killed to be honest. Marta for being useless to him and D or whatever his real name was for insubordination."
"...You're sure she's going to be okay?" Wanda asked quietly, stirring the spoon around in the tea absently. He shouldn't have gotten the privilege of dying quickly, he deserved the slowest most awful death ever, she thought darkly, and this time she did not feel one bit sorry for thinking such a thing.
"Unless there's some unexpected complication or something, yes. She can't have a baby, thank goodness, same as any of the widows, so that's actually...good in this case. She's been active and physically healthy up until she was injured, so she should heal quickly if she lets herself rest. Marta has asked for you, but she also knows it isn't safe for you or me to go to that hospital, so the second she's out of there, we can make sure you can see her." Nat was glad Wanda seemed to relax a bit finally, though she was clearly still angry.
"Do Marta's relatives know what happened to her?" Wanda flexed her bad arm a bit and began pacing the little room instead. If there are more people like that man D out there, I will get rid of them myself.
"They know she's been found, but that's it. She hasn't had a chance to make any choices for herself in her life since she was a toddler. I can't just make her go live with those relatives, even if they do genuinely want her." Wanda thought Nat looked a bit antsy and was very sure her friend probably wanted a good workout to get out some of her frustration.
"Marta said she wanted to meet them," Wanda told Nat. "She said she wanted Polina present though, and...me, for some reason."
Natasha smiled at that. "Probably because you can confirm to her that they do, in fact, truly want her and aren't just stepping up out of duty or something. She told me to tell you she enjoyed spending time with you."
I know. I just don't understand why she trusts me to do that. “Is Polina okay too? She was so angry." Wanda sighed and finally settled back down on the bed with the sandwich. The small lamp on the nightstand gave just enough light that the room was easy to see in but still felt cozy.
"She owes you an apology."
Wanda gave her friend a dubious look. "Are you saying that or did Polina say it? Because I got the impression she does not like me very much." Which is fine. I can understand that.
"Polina said it after Yelena proceeded to chew her out for what she said to you in the car." Nat looked rather amused now, much to Wanda's surprise. "Look, I think it's clear every single person in our group here has been traumatized, whether they want to admit it or not. Polina had no right to say you didn't understand anything, and I know you know it because you spoke up for yourself for once."
"...I guess. I wasn't hurt like Marta though, either."
"Maybe not, but Polina still had no right to say that."
Polina padded silently into the room, her damp hair twisted up in a loose bun for now. She was scowling, but she also seemed more relaxed than when Wanda had seen her earlier. "Natalia, I will give that enhanced girl my own apology, thank you."
"Using her name instead of calling her 'that enhanced girl' would be a good start," Nat deadpanned.
"Calling her enhanced isn't an insult; that is what she is. I'm not reporting her, not when you two helped Marta."
"That is the bare minimum you can do for her."
"Well, if she protected herself better she wouldn't have-"
"Try finishing that sentence and I'll make sure you can't." Natasha's voice was deadly calm, but Wanda knew she was pissed anyway.
Polina went silent, stared at Nat for a few interminable seconds, and then glanced at Wanda. "You are lucky to have her in your corner," she said quietly to Wanda.
Wanda tilted her head slightly, her eyes a bit brighter than normal. "I know. I do not feel lucky often, but I am very lucky to have a friend like Nat," she agreed quietly. Polina is upset. I think she lashes out when she's hurting, like...me. She still doesn't feel safe and I think she's jealous of Nat, not so much me.
"You guarded Marta. Thank you. I don't know what she is to me now, but I do know I care about her wellbeing. I...think I love her. So I appreciate your help."
Wanda nodded. Nat still looked like she was waiting for Polina to apologize, but she didn't say anything, either. The sound of rain tinkled on the roof amidst the tense quiet, and Wanda wasn't sure if she should say anything or not. She did not particularly care if Polina apologized or not anyway, and she didn't want a forced or fake apology at all.
But Polina finally just said, "I should not have dismissed you earlier. I didn't think you knew or understood any of what was happening, and I'm sorry. That was unfair to assume and rude regardless."
She means that. I can tell. "That's all right. I might have snapped and dismissed me, too," Wanda told her. Nat would not like her saying that, but it was true and she really wasn't upset with Polina anyway.
Polina didn't smile, but she did nod. "You made a very good impression on Marta. She also started asking for you the second she was out of surgery before she was even completely awake."
Wanda tensed. Marta asking for her was nice, but that was also dangerous if someone else heard her. "Polina, I will be happy to visit Marta as much as she wants, but..." She looked to Nat for backup.
"Meaning you and Marta cannot talk about Wanda at that hospital, that's all," Natasha said quickly. "You know that."
Polina looked offended, but she nodded. "Of course. She was just talking to your sister. More mumbling than talking. I'm going back to the hospital to stay with Marta." She paused in the doorway, shoulders tense. "Marta would recover better at Vostokoff's place, wouldn't she? I have no idea what I will do now, but I do know I want that girl safe even if it means losing her. I'll keep the cover job at the museum temporarily if they will still have me after I left today, but..."
"If Marta comes back to Melina's with Nat, Yelena, and me, I will take care of her as much as I can," Wanda said as she tucked a bit of hair behind her ear, "and I'm sure Antonia would also like her." Also, if Antonia really does want to move to her new apartment with Lerato, then Marta would have more than enough room, too.
Notes:
Next time: Wanda and Nat return to Melina’s, Marta comes to stay there for a bit until she’s able to travel safely, and a Rogue Avengers check-in with Steve and Sam:)
I know exactly how/when I want this fic to end and I am looking forward to the next mini-arcs before said ending. I think we are probably about 2/3 or so through the story at this point- I am usually pretty bad at guessing the number of chapters I’ll end up with since I just split them where it feels right to do so, but that is my current estimate! Again, I’m sorry for the long wait, but I hope the new chapter was worth it. Thank you so much for reading<3
Chapter 27: Chapter 27
Summary:
In which Wanda and Nat return to Melina’s house, Wanda tries to comfort a closed-off Nat, and Marta is able to come to Melina’s house to stay for awhile.
Chapter Text
In the morning, Wanda asked if she could send Marta flowers somehow. "I know I can't see her until she leaves the hospital, but I think I would like flowers if I was her. Or give her a CD with that horrible song she likes on it? I would love opening a present like that."
This made Nat laugh. "Yes, I think we can arrange that. Why don't you call Yelena and she can go grab some flowers for her on your behalf? You could also order the CD and have it shipped to Melina's under her name or Marta's. Melina wouldn't care."
Satisfied with this plan, Wanda called Yelena, who promptly just said, "I can definitely do that. Also, the injured gremlin wants to talk to you herself.
Wanda wondered if Marta minded being called a gremlin. "Okay, thank you." She heard some quiet conversation with Polina over the flowers, and then Marta's tired voice.
“Hi, Wanda. It's just Polina and Yelena here with me," Marta said over the phone. "I'll call you Lina if someone else can hear us."
"Okay. Are...are you feeling a little bit better than yesterday?" Wanda asked hopefully. I hate the 'are you okay?' question. Maybe Marta hates it too and 'better than yesterday' is a better question?
“Actually I feel a lot better than yesterday. Because I'm not scared somebody is going to do something else nasty to me. Or kill me. Well, not right now, anyway." Marta sounded flat and matter-of-fact about this, and Wanda knew she was telling the truth. "Sorry, Wanda. I know what you meant. It really sucks, but definitely still better than yesterday. Also, I'm bored already. Not being scared means laying around is really, really boring.”
Wanda wished she could give Marta a hug. "I...I'm glad you feel safe, at least," she said quietly.
Nat gave Wanda a mildly concerned glance, but she also let Wanda be, because worried or not, she was also glad Wanda had clearly made a new friend. Besides, the more connections Marta could make with others, the easier it would be for her to settle into some sort of normal life outside of the Red Room.
Wanda flopped on her back on the bed, resting her sore arm on one of the pillows. "...Marta? Are you still there?”
There was a brief muffled exchange with Marta asking Yelena how to explain that she didn't feel safe, she just felt better; and then Yelena saying rather snappishly to just tell the truth. "My sister's goofy friend will understand just fine," said Yelena, "and also, you aren't covering the speaker, Marta...Wanda can hear all of this, you know."
"...'m tired, I forgot, not my fault," Marta retorted, but Wanda could hear the teasing in the younger girl's voice and it made Wanda smile. "Yeah, still here. Sorry. I want my weapons back, that's all. Don't feel safe 'cause I don't have them. Polina snuck me an ordinary taser, but that's it." Marta sounded very disappointed.
“Well, Polina and Yelena have theirs, right?" Wanda asked slowly. I can definitely understand not feeling safe because of that.
"Yeah. I don't think they're supposed to, either, though."
“They'll protect you. You are safe, even if you don't feel like it."
“I know. Um, I think I'd like to come stay at Melina Vostokoff's place for a bit. Polina and I talked it over." Marta hesitated before continuing, "Polina hates her but she said I should go. Anyway, so I think I'll get to see you there. I dunno what I'm supposed to do now, but..."
"I think you could figure that out while you're healing, right?" Wanda knew quite well what feeling like she didn't know what to do next was like, but she wasn't sure how to comfort Marta, either. I will give Marta a hug when I see her if she lets me.
Marta sighed. "I guess. I hate not being able to do anything. Like, I don't feel good at all, but I want to go do something anyway. This is boring, boring, boring. And if I could go do something, it would be distracting from thinking about...stuff.”
Marta sounds frustrated and exhausted. “I'm sorry, Marta. I wish I could make you feel better," Wanda said, unsure what to say when she couldn't see or sense Marta from just the phone call.
“Don't say sorry. Also, guess what? Polina really did cut up D," Marta informed Wanda with great relish, "and got rid of him with Yelena. All disposed of. Good.”
Wanda did not particularly want to know details about a dead person being chopped up and disposed of, even though she didn't remotely care what happened to that man, either. For a moment she wondered why Yelena and Polina had told Marta that at all, but Marta had expressed that she wanted to get rid of him, so it made sense. "That's...nice?"
Yelena laughed on the other end of the line. "It wasn't nice, you don't have to pretend. It was nasty. Marta, what did you tell her that for?" She sounded very amused.
“Because I wanted to."
__________________
The nosy concerned woman that had said she would return with food showed up just as Nat and Wanda were leaving the little vacation house a little while later. "Give this to Polina," the woman ordered, thrusting a foil-covered plate into Wanda's hands. "Tell her she hasn't lost her job, but she needs to call out next time." The woman noticed Natasha and frowned. "You look familiar."
Before either rogue Avenger could react, the woman's confused expression brightened and she announced, "I know. You look like a runway model I saw on TV last week! Did you hire Lina as a bodyguard or something?”
Whatever Wanda had assumed the woman was going to say, it wasn't that, but she quickly assured the woman she would give the cookies to Polina and climbed in the car. In a few seconds Nat joined her, clearly trying not to laugh. The woman drove off without further issue, and Wanda let herself relax somewhat. She still didn't like being in the car one bit, but her friend was there and she did not feel helpless anymore either. I'm okay. This is fine and there is nothing to be scared of here. Yesterday helping Marta had been distracting enough to mitigate her own anxiety over being in the car.
“That woman was completely oblivious," Natasha told Wanda as they pulled out of the driveway. "She has probably seen both of us on TV, just with our original hair colors. Well, now Lina Kostić is an ex-Widow playing bodyguard to a nonexistent model on TV. Ridiculous, but if it works, she can believe it if she wants."
Wanda laughed. "Some bodyguard. You have been taking care of me for weeks. That woman also saw my neck because I forgot to...hide it."
“She also has seemingly forgotten that I'm significantly shorter than an average runway model should be." Nat paused before adding in a more serious tone, "Wanda, are you absolutely certain that woman wasn't even slightly suspicious of who you really are when she saw you?"
Wanda's hand flitted to her neck as she nodded. "I'm sure. She immediately jumped to assuming I was one of the girls rescued from the Red Room and wanted to take me to the hospital. I know I was stupid, and I'm sorry." I can't believe I forgot. I just...I don't know.
“Honestly, I'm glad you forgot to hide the remainder of those burns," Nat said quietly, "because it means you're feeling better. It sounds ridiculous to us, but I can understand why she would assume they're from the Red Room. Most likely all she knows about it at this point is that it’s full of highly trained abused young women. As long as you're sure, I don't think we have anything to worry about.”
I'm sure. Wanda nodded and looked out the window at the drizzle outside. "I just feel guilty for letting someone believe I was trapped there too, because I wasn't, and I don't want to claim something I have no right to." That probably sounds ridiculous, but…
Natasha was quiet for several seconds, her knuckles white from gripping the steering wheel angrily. Finally she answered, "Okay, I do understand why you would think that, but this is not claiming benefits or something like that when you aren't, in fact, the group the benefits are meant for. You were trapped somewhere, just not there. Also, you are an international fugitive trying to help other people. You couldn't have told that woman, 'Oh, actually I'm not from the Red Room, I'm a rogue Avenger who was tortured in the government-sanctioned underwater prison'. That is ridiculous. What exactly are you proposing that you should have said instead?"
“I don't know. The car accident story? I just...I thought it was better to say less and let her think what she already thought." Wanda squeezed her hands into fists and let a tiny bit of scarlet crackle across her knuckles before dissolving it again. I am not there. I am safe, I helped protect Marta, and...Marta wasn't upset over what I said. If anyone should have been upset, it's her.
“Exactly. That car accident story was more believable before the rest of you was more or less healed. While you certainly could have hurt your neck in a car accident, your injury patterns do not fit with damage from seatbelt abrasions or something. You did the right thing.”
“I know. It still feels like I didn't." Wanda blinked, staring down at the foil-covered plate of cookies on her lap. "Can we give these to Marta?"
“We'll freeze them and you can give them to her when she's able to come to Melina's," Nat assured her, knowing Marta wasn't going to care if the cookies were eaten, but that saving them would probably make Wanda happy. "You did a good job yesterday."
“It feels good to know I was able to help. I know you and Yelena didn't need me, but still. I do not want to tell Steve and Sam I want to do missions again, at least not yet, but I'm glad I came with you to help Polina and Marta."
Nat gave her a sideways glance before turning her attention back to the road. "We won't tell the other fugitive Avengers anything until or if you're ready," she assured Wanda.
“Okay. Thank you."
_____________
The drive back to Melina's house was uneventful; it continued drizzling but nothing more. "Glad you two are back," Melina greeted them. "Yelena called and updated us here. You are sure younger one you rescued is all right?"
Natasha sighed. "Not sure 'all right' is the phrasing I'd use, but she will be. She's bored and in pain, but she's safe, at least."
“Bored means girl is fine," Melina decided.
Alexei looked at Natasha with great interest. "Bored? I will take her some-"
“No! Absolutely not, you will leave Marta alone," Nat interrupted sharply, turning on Alexei and pinning him against the wall. Wanda sensed no malice from Alexei at all and was quite certain he had just let Nat do that without bothering to try preventing it.
Alexei stared at Natasha in confusion. "Why so harsh? What is wrong with giving small widow gift?"
“Nat. Nat, he doesn't want to hurt Marta," Wanda spoke up softly. "He's just dumb." I don't like Alexei one bit, but I think...I think Nat is hurting inside herself and taking that hurt out on him. I don't know what to do. She hesitantly gave her friend a hug. Nat still seemed tense, not at all like the confident cool-as-a-cucumber vibe she normally gave off, and Wanda knew Natasha would not talk about whatever was bothering her.
She could imagine well enough anyway without Nat explaining a thing.
I can speak up. I can do that, at least.
“Alexei, you didn't personally...assault any of the girls, but you did help give them to people who would. So you need to leave Marta alone unless she herself specifically says she does not mind you near her." There. That was a reasonable explanation. "I don't feel unsafe around you, but only because I can literally sense you don't want to hurt us and my enhancements make me stronger than you. Otherwise you would really scare me. Normal people can't do those things. I just don't like you. You hurt my best friend besides my brother." Then Wanda followed Nat outside without giving him a chance to answer when the older Avenger announced she was going to unload the car. "Can I...do anything?”
“You can stay close and just not talk about it for now," Natasha deadpanned. It was still drizzling, and the two of them looked up at the gray cloudy sky.
Wanda nodded. I can do that.
“Still glad you're here though."
“Me too." I am not lying for once. I do feel glad to be here. I think Pietro would be happy.
After unloading the car, Nat told Wanda she was going for a run. "I'll be back. I just need some time alone. You'll be okay for a bit? If you do need anything, call me."
"I'm fine. I want you to take care of you," Wanda said firmly. "Also, I am a very good listener. I'll listen if you do want to talk about whatever is hurting you.” You always try to make me talk about it when I'm upset or hurting or...anything like that.
“I know you will. Go rest a bit yourself."
“Okay."
_________________
Wanda slipped back inside to find Melina very obviously waiting for her. "So, did doing mission help you know?"
“Know...what?"
“If job is not for you or you are not trusting self." Melina looked Wanda right in the eyes. "Perhaps you discover something about self that was unknown before."
Oh. Wanda decided she would answer Melina truthfully; she didn't understand why Melina loved stupid Alexei, but she did trust the woman not to spill secrets, at least. "I realized I can trust myself for a little more than I thought. I dropped Marta and me safely from a hotel balcony. I still wouldn't do any...larger scale things, even if I wasn't on the run, but..." she trailed off, letting a few red wisps twirl around her fingers. "I don't know. I love being able to use it to help people, but I would also be happy to help people without using my enhancements at all. Those are things I knew already though."
Melina pushed her into the kitchen, not gently but not hard either. "Come help make chocolate cake," Melina ordered.
Wanda smiled and relaxed. "Okay. I would love to."
_________________
When Natasha returned, the cake was already in the oven. Wanda heard her friend quietly enter the bathroom for a shower and decided to let Nat be until she was finished. Predictably Natasha slipped into the small bedroom she was staying in with Yelena afterwards without a word. “Can I make some tea?” Wanda asked Melina.
“Of course. You can make whatever you want.”
Wanda made a mug of chamomile tea and padded back over to Nat’s room, making sure not to fill the mug up completely since she didn’t want to risk spilling hot tea everywhere. My hands aren’t nearly so shaky anymore, but I don’t really feel...back to normal either. It’s better than nothing, though. I suppose. “...Nat? I made you tea,” she called through the door.
There was a sigh from inside before the door opened. Wanda bit her lip; Natasha almost looked like she had been crying, but that didn’t seem right to her, either. Yes, it is. She is sad. I can feel it. It’s tiny and quiet in my head, but I know all the same. She’s...louder than normal. Wanda set the mug on the nightstand awkwardly. Nat had let her in, and she knew her friend would tell her she wanted to be left alone if she wanted to be alone, so she would stay. Does she want to talk and isn’t sure if I can handle it? I don’t know. I just know I should stay.
“Thank you. Might need something a little stronger though.”
“Well, then I’ll go get one of those vodka bottles from the kitchen,” Wanda said matter-of-factly. “Nat...do you want to talk about whatever it is? I have a good idea of it, but I can listen. I can handle that.” She plopped on the rug with her legs crossed and leaned against the other bed.
“Wanda, I’m not putting my demons into your head. But I do like having you nearby.”
“You told me you would tell me if you weren’t okay if I asked.”
Nat sighed and came to sit next to Wanda with the tea mug in hand. “That doesn’t mean I am going to explain in minute details about it. Please drop it. Your staying close and offering help is enough.”
Then why do you always try to make me talk about things when I’m upset? Wanda decided to keep that frustrated thought to herself for now. “Well, if you do change your mind, I will listen. Don’t...not tell me because you’re worried about me, at least.”
There was a long silence, but Wanda could tell it wasn’t a bad uncomfortable silence, either. It was clear Nat was not going to discuss whatever was bothering her, but she did give a very concerned Wanda a hug. They heard Melina scolding Alexei for tracking mud around the kitchen and then Alexei grumpily saying he would clean it up after having a drink. Wanda stayed quiet, but she closed her eyes and hugged her friend back. If Nat wants peace and quiet and me here saying nothing, then that’s what I will do.
“I think we should get out of here once Marta is settled somewhere,” Nat said finally. “We’re safe here, but I don’t want you around Melina and Alexei for much longer, either.”
“Okay.” I don’t mind being here. I like it actually, except for being around Alexei. But if Nat wants to leave, then we’re leaving. Wanda hesitated before adding, “Nat, I know you still care about Melina and Alexei, but I think they are...not the best for you, even if we can trust them to keep us hidden. At least for living with them for this long and not just visiting for a day or something. They are not hurting me. I like Melina, actually. Just not Alexei. They are hurting you even though they really are trying their best to be good to you and Yelena now.”
“Wanda, you know darn well it wouldn’t be fair to you or Yelena to just leave right now, and-“
“No,” Wanda interrupted firmly, “that would be perfectly fair, because Yelena would understand, and I have told you I would leave whenever you say so. Yelena loves you. She would want you to be happy. You just don’t want to make me leave because you know I get so...anxious traveling.” She hugged Nat as tightly as she could. “I’m not fine, really, but I’m sort of okay. Home for me right now is just the people I’m closest to. I can be sort of okay somewhere else. I just need a friend and I need a little quiet space.” I think that’s a fair explanation. I want to be honest, but I don’t want Nat sacrificing her own happiness trying to make me feel safe. “I don’t know what you need, but being here isn’t it.”
Natasha sighed, but she also relaxed hearing Wanda talk, because she really did sound much better. “Have I annoyed you fussing over you too much since the rescue?” she asked quietly.
This made Wanda smile. “You really haven’t been fussing over me, just taking care of me since I couldn’t do much for so long. I hate needing help, but it...it’s still nice to have friends being kind and gentle with me instead of...you know. Now, Clint was being fussy sometimes.”
“And you didn’t mind seeing Marta?” Nat asked Wanda carefully.
Wanda was quiet for a minute, considering this. Seeing her hurt Nat, because she was treated like that too. I know that much. “I know you were concerned about exposing me to the horrible things that happened to Marta, but I think seeing her bothered you. She’s just a scared kid. I was one of those once. Only, I had Pietro to protect me from being...assaulted like that. You didn’t. So I don’t think seeing Marta hurt like that hurt me like it did to you.”
The lack of answer was proof enough to Wanda that she was correct; she twisted her fingers together nervously and studied the rug. “You are like Pietro- you try to hide all of the things that hurt you because you think you’re supposed to, and because you’re trying to help me. You are just much better at hiding it than Pietro was, and not all...fidgety either.” There. That seemed like a fair assessment.
“Anything else?” Natasha asked quietly, only half teasing.
“Yes. I told you before you have been spending too much time taking care of me. Well, now instead of taking up all your time, I am taking up too much here” Wanda put her hands over her heart, “because you are hurting and not taking care of you. I think Clint and Laura made sure you did before, and they’re not available to call right now.”
“Are you sure you didn’t use your powers to say those things?” Natasha was smiling somewhat, so Wanda knew her friend knew she had not done that.
Wanda bit her lip and let a wisp of scarlet dance over her palm. “I’m sure. I mean...I know bits and pieces because of what I did last year, and you know I sort of sense general feelings passively, but otherwise...no enhancements on you. I promise.” I will never do that to her again. Never ever. “Maybe you could talk to Sam or Steve if you don’t want to talk to me?”
This made Natasha laugh. “No, I’m not doing that. They wouldn’t understand. If I did decide to talk about it, it would be to either Yelena or you. You do know it’s not you personally, right?”
“I know it, but it’s sort of...hard to believe it,” Wanda said, which was true. “But that is my problem, not yours. I trust you.”
_______________
The next day Yelena brought a half-asleep Marta 'home'. Antonia, who was absolutely delighted that there was going to be yet another girl around, shifted her weight from one foot to the other silently as she waited outside with Wanda. "Hi, Marta. Wanda and I made room for you in my room," Antonia greeted her. "Well. It can be your room soon. I've got a nice little place to live with Lerato."
“...Hi." Marta blinked a few times, wishing Polina was there, but Polina would not come to Melina's house, period, and it made Marta nervous. Polina had brought her a pretty pink and purple beaded bracelet while she was in the hospital, and now Marta studied it intently. The older ex-widow had been adamant in reassuring her that yes, she did care about her, but she couldn't bring herself to go to Melina Vostokoff's house. "Muddy," she murmured, frustrated already with trying to use crutches in the yard and not get the cast on her broken leg dirty. Also, she was sleepy.
Wanda easily sensed the frustrated anger and dash of fear from the younger girl, and she was glad to see Yelena just pick Marta up and deposit her in the doorway to the room Antonia was sharing with Wanda. Marta was clearly still annoyed, but she managed to give Wanda a watery smile. "I'm glad you're here," Wanda said quietly. "Can I do something?"
“No." Marta did not hug, but she was staring in that I think I want a hug but I don't know how to ask and I don't know if I should trust you way that Wanda recognized from herself when she'd first joined the Avengers the year before.
“Well, you're going to have my bed," Wanda told her. "Antonia and I decided. The air mattress is mine." Wanda nudged said air mattress with her foot. She and Antonia had set it up in the room so none of them would have to sleep on the floor. It was somewhat cramped now, but Wanda almost liked that, because it reminded her of her long since destroyed family apartment. Antonia had offered Wanda her own bed, but Wanda knew Antonia didn't really want to give it up and was just trying to be nice. Besides, even the air mattress seemed heavenly compared to the cold hard floor from the Raft cell. She wasn’t alone, she was warm and had things to wear that were comfy and that she liked, and there was no shock collar constantly hurting her either.
“...Okay." Marta sounded tired and sad, and when Wanda cautiously offered her a hug and made sure to say it was fine if Marta didn't want a hug, the girl startled Wanda by clinging to her and starting to cry. "Not...not supposed to do this, I'm sorry, I-"
“I don't mind. It can be our secret," Wanda whispered in Marta's ear. "Well. And Antonia, since she's in here too."
“The marble broke."
Not wanting Marta to hurt herself further, Wanda gently pushed her to sit on the bed, but she willingly continued hugging her anyway. Marta remained tense and was sort of squishing her, but Wanda ignored this. I don't know exactly what 'the marble broke' means, but I can imagine. I don't know what to do. Rather than attempt forcing any pleasant emotions on Marta, which was what she dearly wanted to do, Wanda assured her it was safe to be upset and cry here.
“Wanda, it's safe for her to cry here, but she's going to make her whole face hurt doing that," Antonia whispered. "I know Marta didn't get horrible burns like I did, but..." she put her hand over her eye.
“If it's going to hurt anyway I want to be able to feel things if I want to," Marta said in an odd, flat voice. She let Wanda tuck her under the covers and prop the injured leg up with pillows...and then she grabbed one of the extra pillows and put it over her own head. "Is it really ugly?" she asked, voice muffled under the pillow. "They wouldn't give me a mirror at the hospital."
Antonia tugged the pillow away from Marta. "You can't put stuff on your face 'til you heal," she scolded. "Don't do that. And we don't know what it looks like because there's a big pressure bandage over it. So right now it doesn't look like anything at all to us."
Marta looked at Wanda, as if she might give a different answer. "You saw it before I went to the hospital. Tell me what it looked like.”
“Marta, it just looked awful to me because nobody had cared for it properly yet," Wanda said slowly. "I was scared and it made me especially angry because of how it happened. I know your friend Polina did her best before, but now it's been taken care of properly. You need to ask someone besides us about it, but I would think you could get a pretend eye to match your natural blue one once it's healed completely. Or some other color if you wanted to."
This idea seemed to intrigue Marta. "A pink one," she declared, pleased with this idea.
Antonia laughed. "You'll look like a weird bunny rabbit," she teased.
“If I can get a red one it will look like her weird glowy magic eyes," Marta added, pointing at Wanda. Marta seemed to grow more exhausted all of a sudden and closed her good eye, but she reached to squeeze Wanda's hand and then Antonia's too. "I have decided I like both of you. Thanks."
__________________
Once Marta had finally fallen asleep (with that taser under her pillow), Wanda padded out of the room in search of Melina, because she had the idea that maybe she could cook something for everyone, and that doing so wasn't going to make her collapse or something at this point. I wanted to make something for everyone back at the vacation house in New York, and I never really got to. She found Yelena flopped on the sofa with Nat in the living room, but no Melina. "Where is Melina? I thought maybe I could cook something for all of us, and I wanted to ask first."
"Oh, you can do that. She will not care," Yelena assured her. "What will you make?"
“I...I sort of want to make paprikash. If that's okay.”
“Make whatever you want,” Nat said quietly.
“Okay.” Wanda padded back into the kitchen in search of ingredients. She didn’t consider herself an expert cook or anything, but she liked doing so all the same. Anyways, she could make better paprikash than poor Vision, who was absolutely horrible at cooking and tried to anyway because he wanted to make her happy. She hoped he would be able to come back and visit soon, but she suspected it would probably be awhile.
Still, she loved reading the multiple messages Vision texted her. ‘Hello, Wanda. I miss you. I shall return soon, hopefully.’
’There are ducks near the Compound. They remind me of you.’ This was followed by multiple pictures of ducks, some of which were so crispy clear that Wanda wondered how Vision had taken them for her.
‘If you need Thor’s contact information, you can reach his roommate Darryl here. Also, please let me know if you need any more funds. I shall send you some as quickly as possible.’ This had made Wanda suspect Tony had told Vis to say the money part, because Tony was the only one ridiculous enough to think she and the other rogues had blown through all of that money already. Technically she and Nat hadn’t spent any of it at all yet.
And, ’I know you are safe, but I also hope you are feeling better. Would you like me to bring you anything next time?’
Wanda had just told him she was fine and that her arm was much, much better, since she wasn’t sure how to explain much further than that just over text, and then told him to just bring himself and that was enough. Now she sighed and touched the fading marks across her neck. Don’t think about that anymore. Make the dish and pretend we’re all together again, Pietro’s voice flitted through her head now. You have friends there. And a not-so-little kid to help take care of. She needs someone detached from that nasty organization that can still understand. That’s you.
Wanda sighed, happy doing so didn’t hurt anymore. Marta really wasn’t that much younger than Yelena or her, but she seemed like it somehow, even though Wanda knew Marta had been expected to ‘grow up’ far too quickly. The girl was clearly not okay; she wouldn’t sleep without that taser under her pillow and Wanda knew Marta’s leg was hurting her badly...though, much like her, Marta didn’t want to take more pain meds either.
If Pietro was here, he would be able to make Marta happy, Wanda couldn’t help thinking. Well, then she would just try to think what Pietro would do to make Marta feel better.
The paprikash seemed to be coming along nicely and while Wanda liked being in the kitchen with a friend, making something by herself was also pleasant. There were still things she couldn’t do properly with her left hand because of her arm still feeling stiff and weaker than normal, like holding jars with tight lids still and keeping measuring spoons steady, but using bits of her magic to help with those things instead worked perfectly fine.
Yelena wandered into the kitchen after awhile, saying it smelled good and asking if Wanda wanted to go somewhere with her and Natasha. “She is not happy here.”
“I mean, I would, but that isn’t very safe…” Wanda trailed off and started washing the dishes now piled in the sink. “And having me along makes that danger worse.”
“But she will not leave without you,” Yelena said simply.
Wanda frowned. I know Nat knows I’m fine enough to take care of myself for a bit. She always makes sure to remind me I’m safe and that I can go to her for help if I need to, but she doesn’t fuss. That doesn’t make sense. “I don’t like being alone sometimes, but I would be all right for a little while. I could even just help take care of Marta and watch a show with her or something. What did Nat say?”
“Well, I made her go lie down for now,” Yelena told her, “but something is not right. Stubborn. Won’t talk.” She huffed and began helping with the dishes. “Only new thing from her I got is she does not trust Alexei.”
Wait. “Nat doesn’t think he would hurt any of us, does she?” Wanda said softly. “Because I can confirm for absolute certain that he won’t. He is stupid and I don’t like him, but...there’s no...nasty disgusting malice there at all. I...I can feel that much.”
Yelena studied her with great interest. “You read his mind? Must be horrifying in there,” she deadpanned.
“A little bit? I was concerned for you and Nat.” Wanda tensed all over, half worried Yelena would push her away now, but Yelena only looked curious. “Honestly the most horrifying thing was that he, um, likes Melina wearing fox ears, which I did not need to know one bit, thank you very much.”
“Oh gross. What do you have to tell me that for?!” Yelena looked disgusted, but she was also laughing. “What else?”
“The only reason I got that was because that thought was right on top. I just wanted his feelings towards...all of us? I- I hope that makes sense.” Wanda closed her eyes and turned away abruptly, water droplets plinking to the floor as she wrapped her arms around herself instinctively. Maybe I shouldn’t have done that. Did I do something wrong? Invade his privacy too? I shouldn’t have. And I’ll scare Yelena. I don’t want to hurt her either. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I won’t do it again-“
“Wanda, what’s wrong with you? Do I look mad? I do not care.” Yelena turned the water off and spun Wanda around by her good arm. “Alexei won’t, even. I know why you do such a thing.”
“But that’s just it. I didn’t need to,” Wanda said softly. “He is quite literally that dumb. He is proud of you and Nat. He loves Melina. He is hurt that Dreykov discarded their, um...friendship. He also likes drinking and thinks too highly of himself. I don’t think he understands why the Red Room was so horrible. It’s like...like he pushed the abuse and everything else aside or something, or he has chosen to block it out.” She paused, biting her lip. “But he would never, ever assault any of us like that handler did to Marta. Melina included. If she said ‘No’ he wouldn’t force her to do anything. I know that much.”
Yelena’s eyes looked somewhat shiny. “Great. I can trust the only dad I ever had to not rape me or my friends. The bar is in hell,” she muttered in Russian, but she also patted Wanda’s shoulder awkwardly. “Glad you poked at his head, honestly. I would have done it too if I had your weird enhancements. I don’t understand him. Maybe Melina loves him because she knows he wouldn’t do that to her and the other men she was used to being around would. I don’t understand her either.”
Wanda instinctively hugged Yelena, who sighed but didn’t pull away, either. “I don’t think you and Nat have to understand them to love them but still feel hurt. Maybe you should take her somewhere fun for a bit. You and Nat deserve to be happy.”
“Now you are dumb. I told you she won’t go anywhere without you.”
“Then we’ll put me somewhere out of sight. If we went to a cabin or hotel or something, I can just stay inside while you two do something else. Half the trouble is risking me getting...triggered by something harmless anyway.” Saying that out loud made Wanda internally cringe, but she knew it was true. She could hide the remaining marks on her neck and the soft elastic bandage supporting her elbow easily at this point, but she couldn’t guarantee some particular noise or a stranger touching her or something wouldn’t set her off in public, either. One slip, one mistake of glowing red eyes or a bit of scarlet hazing her fingers, and everything would be ruined if the wrong person saw her. But I did help rescue Marta and Polina, and I didn’t mess up. “I think Marta needs us, though. So I do not want to leave her right now.”
“Let’s take my sister camping,” Yelena decided. “Away from people and safe, then. There are plenty of supplies here.”
Wanda did not understand the appeal of purposely ‘roughing it’ sleeping outdoors one bit; she didn’t mind it exactly and was more than used to doing so from being on the streets of Novi Grad with Pietro for years, but choosing to seemed silly to her. Still, Yelena seemed excited by this idea and Wanda liked being invited to do something. Besides, camping with supplies was not the same as living in that damp cardboard box. If she went camping now, it would be like when Clint and his family took her camping last year. She would get to sleep safe and cozy inside a sleeping bag, not be curled up shivering all night without enough clothes to keep her warm in the winter. “Okay. Let’s, once Marta has a home. For now, I am going to finish cooking and cleaning up in here.”
Notes:
Any kudos/comments are much appreciated<3
Chapter 28: Chapter 28
Summary:
In which Marta comes to Melina’s for a bit before she’s able to leave, Wanda goes on a short camping trip with Nat and Yelena...and Wanda makes a solid decision for what to do next.
Notes:
Here we go, the bridge chapter before new location and things! I have some future sections prewritten that I’m excited to get to.
I am sorry for the delay with this chapter. Marta was starting to derail the story too much, and I never meant for her to be more than a minor OC in this fic. So I will just be self-indulgent and give her her own fic later on, once at least one of my current big projects is finished. Here, she’s staying a minor character! Lol
I really hope you enjoy:)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Wanda brought dinner to Marta once it was ready. Marta lay very still on her bed staring at the ceiling, but she also muttered a thank-you at Wanda appearing with the dinner. Then she sighed. “Why are you bringing dinner?”
“Because I want to. And I can make something else, if you’d rather. Anything you like.” It was not lost on Wanda that she was telling Marta pretty much exactly what Laura and Nat had told her back at the vacation house. And, like her, Marta didn’t seem to know what to do with this information. The younger girl was tense and confused, and her fingers were twitchy.
“You’re weird. Aren’t you supposed to be resting yourself anyway?” Marta sighed, but she also took the dinner tray, her cheeks slightly pink. “Um...thank you. I should say thank you, I think.” She nibbled at the food a bit and gave Wanda a real smile. “It’s really good! We didn’t get starved or anything in the Red Room, except for some specific training days, but we didn’t get, like...homey food like this, either.”
Wanda was delighted that something she had made would make Marta happy enough to smile. “I’m fine. I will probably go to bed early, but otherwise I’m okay. I’m so glad you like it. There is plenty more, so let me know if you’d like seconds.” I remember Mama making it for us when we were little. And Vision tried to make it for me back at the Compound. It is homey food.
“Cool.” Marta was clearly still exhausted, but the dinner seemed to have made her much happier. “You are still going to talk to my aunt and uncle with me, right?”
“I would if I knew it won’t get you or me into trouble. I don’t have any way of knowing if they will approve of their niece spending time with international fugitives,” Wanda told Marta honestly. “But I can listen if you video chat with them. You should take Polina or Yelena with you, not Nat or me. And, I can promise I will spend time with you here as much as you like, and I will also go away immediately if you’d rather be by yourself for a bit.”
Marta sighed. “I guess I knew that you can’t. I like it here. I’ve been in plenty of houses before on assignment, yeah, but not a home. Melina Vostokoff is confusing. Polina hates her, but she seems nice. I just don’t get why she likes the Red Guardian.” She nibbled at the food a bit more before giving Wanda a tiny smile. “Home is a feeling, not a place, though...I think.”
“I think so too.” Wanda spoke quietly, twisting the rings on her fingers. “Maybe here can be home for us for now, even if we know it isn’t permanent.” I think. I have friends here. Marta doesn’t know any of us much yet, but she will. I will take care of her as much as I can.
Marta didn’t say anything else, just watched Wanda curiously. “You should stop the tic with the rings. Somebody will think you’re anxious.”
I am anxious. Often. Twisting rings around her fingers was a sort of calming ritual to her for years, ever since she’d first gotten some as a kid from Pietro, who knew his sister longed for pretty jewelry things, no matter how impractical that was. Wanda sighed and settled herself on the air mattress so she was nearby but not in Marta’s personal space. “I don’t really care if you think I’m anxious,” Wanda said after a minute. I can’t tell her I’d rather fiddle with my jewelry than risk making a power mistake, or... something. I don’t know. “Doing that is calming to me, a little bit.”
“Oh.” Marta made the same confused face both Yelena and Antonia often gave her. “Well, you letting people know how you feel is weird. It’s all over you.”
“I thought I was the telepath,” Wanda deadpanned, feeling somewhat embarrassed even though she could tell Marta didn’t care.
“Who needs that? I think your enhancements make your feelings more obvious to other people rather than less. You are happy to be here, but you’re anxious a lot, and you’re hurt if people don’t like you. You feel too much all of the time.”
She’s right. Wanda couldn’t help wondering why everyone around her here could tell those things, but somehow all the staff within the Raft didn’t seem to even see her as a person. She blinked and looked away, hugging a pillow to her chest. “You barely know me.”
“Yes, but you showed me memories of yours. And even if you didn’t I’d still think that stuff. You would be so dead in the Red Room,” Marta said quietly. “I guess...I guess I don’t understand why you let others see the hurt things, that’s all.” She nibbled more of the food and watched the older girl squeezing the pillow and fiddling with her fingers.
“Maybe you and the others are just willing to see me and not just a walking nuke. There are a lot of people that only see some enhanced thing they don’t really consider a person. They are probably the same people that don’t see the not-Widow parts of Nat.” Wanda knew Marta was just curious, that she’d initiated the conversation about Wanda instead of herself, but Wanda also felt awkward when Marta was the hurt one. Maybe Marta thinks it’s easier to talk about my feelings than hers. Maybe she’s using mine to help organize hers in her head. I can understand that. I know I have done that myself.
“She is hard to read,” Marta pointed out as she continued eating the dinner. “You are not. Do you think me and the rest are hard to read?”
Wanda considered this question carefully. “I find Nat easier to read than the rest of you, but only because I know her. You are probably the easiest. But, Marta, you don’t have to hide your feelings here.”
Marta looked a bit offended, because Wanda’s quiet words meant she must be the worst-trained one of the group. Logically, it made sense: she was the youngest and didn’t have as much experience. The slowly growing bit of her that wanted to have a chance to be the normal girl she could never remember being preened, which was also confusing. “I know. I don’t know how. I don’t know...me.”
“Then we’ll help you figure that out.” Wanda really wanted to hug Marta, but she stayed put.
A light knock made both girls look toward the door. Antonia kicked the door open and came in carrying another dinner tray. “I brought you food too, Wanda. Melina said you should eat in here with Marta if you want.”
Wanda told Antonia thank-you and settled back in her spot on the air mattress. I really do like the dish I made. Not as good as Mama’s, but I don’t think anything would be. She liked cooking and baking things, but she knew she was nowhere near as skilled at doing so as her own mother had been. Still, making things in the kitchen was like a quiet connection to her lost family to Wanda, and she enjoyed being able to share that with others.
The girls ate in silence, but Wanda could tell it wasn’t a bad silence, either. Marta still appeared enamored with the food, and it made Wanda herself happier also.
Once they were finished eating, Wanda asked Marta if she wanted any pain meds, but Marta only looked confused. “Why? This pain is not going to make me scream or something. Nobody gets meds for this.”
Wanda bit her lip, wishing she didn’t understand exactly why Marta was saying that. “I’m not saying you have to take anything, just that it’s an option,” Wanda told her. She looked down at her own hands; she could feel them shaking a bit and there was nothing they could do to fix that, not when she knew it wasn’t from being anxious at the moment. I shouldn’t be thinking about what’s wrong with me, not when Marta is hurt far worse and doesn’t even really have any memories of not being in the Red Room.
...I have lots of memories from before the Raft, before Hydra...before our apartment was destroyed. Pietro, make me think right. I have to comfort Marta and I feel selfish because I keep thinking about me. Wanda clasped her hands together in her lap and tried to focus. Marta. Marta was there now, and Marta needed help. The others thought she was taking care of Marta.
“...Is there something wrong with you?” Marta’s quiet voice sounded both curious and concerned. “Maybe you need medicine, not me. You look shaky. I can’t tell if you’re injured or just upset.”
Maybe, but I don’t think pain medicine can fix me. Wanda did not particularly want to explain, but she could tell Marta was just going to keep asking, so she said, “I think I just have weird damage from all the electrical shocks. It does happen when I’m anxious sometimes, but that’s...not it right now.”
“You could sue for that. You got hurt in a government facility and they haven’t got any right to do that. I know this.” Marta sounded pleased with herself.
“Marta...I can’t do that. My teammates that took a deal can, but any of us that are still fugitives can’t realistically do that, especially not me. Are you sure I can’t get you anything?” Wanda did offer Marta another blanket, which the girl happily accepted and buried her nose in.
Marta continued hugging the blanket rather than curling up under it, but her good eye sparkled happily. “I’m glad I came here. It doesn’t feel real yet. I don’t feel good, but I do feel safe.”
Safe is good. Safe is always good.
______________
The next few days passed uneventfully, and Wanda tried to keep an eye on Nat, who just seemed sad to her, even though there was nothing obviously wrong. Wanda and Yelena privately planned to take Natasha on the camping trip once Marta was home safe. Wanda did not speak to Marta’s aunt and uncle, but she did silently listen to the video call out of sight per Marta’s request. They lived in a small town in New Jersey called Westview, they knew details about Marta’s current condition and had seen her, and they seemed very excited to adopt the girl.
“Your birth name is Makenzie. We’re so excited to have you.”
Wanda could not help an unpleasant prick of jealousy over that, and then felt nasty for feeling that way. Poor Marta deserved to have family members that wanted her. I really do want Marta to be safe and happy.
“Did you look for me before?” Marta asked hesitantly, and Wanda knew she was scared to hear the answer.
“No, because your birth mother told us you’d died, long ago. You were two then. I’m sorry, Makenzie. There wasn’t any reason to believe that had been faked back then.”
“I do not wanna be called that,” Marta said in this weird, flat tone. She squeezed her hands into fists, gripping handfuls of blanket and looking angry. “Wait. I do not know yet. I don’t-“ she glanced over to Wanda, who only smiled at her encouragingly.
“It’s all right. If they are nice people they’ll call you what you want to be called,” Wanda told her telepathically, unsure if she was supposed to do that but also not knowing how else to help.
Marta looked at Wanda, immediately knowing she shouldn’t have, and mumbled, “I think I do like my real name. It just feels really weird to not be Marta.”
“Well, just...let us know, okay? You can pick something entirely different to go by if you want to, and if you want to legally change your name, that’s fine too. Do you have a friend there with you or something?”
“She does not want to be on video,” Marta said smoothly, which was technically true.
“Okay, well tell her she can come visit you whenever she likes.”
Wanda scrunched herself into a tighter ball on her air mattress, but she was smiling. I can’t go visit Marta in Westview. Her relatives don’t know I’m me, but being invited somewhere feels nice anyway.
“She heard you,” Marta said, “and I do not think she will come. But you made her happy anyway.”
_____________
“I’m really going on a plane to go to New Jersey already?!” Marta asked in surprise the next day, visibly excited.
“Well, you’ll meet your family in New York at the airport, but yes,” Natasha told her with a smile.
Marta still wished Wanda could come with her, but at least Polina was accompanying her, so she wouldn’t have to deal with flying alone with the broken leg in a cast. It seemed weird that her eye didn’t hurt as bad as her leg, but after hanging out with Antonia and Wanda for a week, she didn’t think she minded so much what it might look like anymore, at least. Antonia was pretty in an odd sort of way to her; and while Wanda didn’t have any obvious visible scars on her face, her quiet reassurances made Marta feel better.
Polina still would not come to Melina’s house, but she had agreed to meet Yelena and Marta in the city and then go on to the airport with Marta herself. Yelena would return to Melina’s after, while Natasha and Wanda remained behind for obvious reasons since they were still international fugitives. Antonia had also finally let Lerato convince her to come join her in the new flat in the city, and she told Wanda she would make sure to email once in awhile and let Wanda hug her.
Once Marta was ready to leave, Wanda offered her a hug too, which the younger girl happily accepted. “I don’t know if I’ll ever get to see you again, but I’m glad I met you,” Wanda whispered in Marta’s ear.
Marta’s expression lit up, and she shoved her crutches at Yelena before hugging Wanda tightly herself. “I’m glad too. I will send letters here so’s Yelena can get them. Then she can get them to you I think. And thank you for the CD. I have never got a CD just for me before.”
Wanda laughed at that. As she had hoped, Marta was delighted to receive her own CD and she’d watched Marta treat that thing with reverence as if it were gold. “Send us your new address and I will try to mail you more things. Getting mail is nice.”
“I will. I promise.”
_____________________
The day after Marta left, Natasha gave Wanda a dubious look when Yelena and Wanda presented the hiking and camping idea. “Do you really feel like doing that yet?” she asked carefully.
Wanda shrugged. “I don’t understand the appeal of camping and sleeping outdoors on purpose when we don’t have to, but I’m happy to try. I probably can’t hike all day or something, but I’m all right. My ankle feels back to normal and has for awhile. I just...still get tired more easily than usual.” I feel like that’s honest. I don’t need my arm functioning perfectly for this, and my neck is okay too, really. She knew the burn marks on her neck were still visible, but they had faded significantly by now and it didn’t hurt anymore either...unless she poked at the bits where the deepest damage had been. Wanda had completely stopped bothering hiding her neck by now and she thought if it was safe for her to be recognized in public, she wouldn’t mind quite so much now if strangers saw her.
“Come on, you know friend is fine. If she is tired, then you help her,” Yelena suggested. She did not mind helping Nat’s friend if absolutely necessary, but she was convinced Wanda really was fine. “We are not climbing Mount Everest.”
Nat sighed again, but she also nodded; it would be pleasant to be out of the house, especially to spend time with both of the younger girls. Yelena looked so hopeful, and Natasha genuinely wanted to get Wanda away from here at this point, even though logical instinct said she was physically safe at Melina’s. Heck, both Alexei and Melina would willingly eliminate anyone that attempted to come on that property to search for Wanda, let alone turn her in. “All right, under one condition. Wanda, you have to stop if you’re getting tired. There is no reason to overdo it for what is supposed to be a leisure activity right now.”
“I understand,” Wanda said immediately. Nat isn’t even being fussy, really...she never fusses. She just seems antsy.
_______________
“Let me take pictures of my three girls before you go,” Alexei said proudly before the trio set off into the brush away from Melina’s house once they had overnight supplies packed.
Wanda knew Nat did not care for this comment and that Yelena had just decided to ignore him, but somehow just being included as the same as the others was a big deal to Wanda. I don’t even like Alexei at all. Why does it mean so much to me to not be excluded? She had zero desire to be anywhere near ridiculous obnoxious Alexei, but she realized she genuinely did not mind this picture-taking idea at all. And when Natasha sighed and obliged herself, arms around both Wanda and Yelena, Wanda found herself smiling without feeling she was forcing herself to do so.
I am not alone at all.
“Let them be,” Melina ordered, and steered Alexei back inside, waving Nat, Yelena, and Wanda to go ahead. “No one is coming on the property. Do not worry.”
Wanda suspected Nat and Yelena were walking a little slower than they might have otherwise if she wasn’t there, but Natasha already seemed happier once they had started walking, so Wanda didn’t say anything. I wish I was completely back to normal by now. I feel fine, I’m not going to collapse or anything, but I can still feel myself weirdly...shaking a tiny bit.
It had not mattered when she’d helped rescue Marta either, and she had successfully made dinner on her own without issue more than once by now, but Wanda still wished it would stop. The longer the little intermittent tremors in her body remained, the more Wanda worried they wouldn’t go away completely at all, and she didn’t want a permanent reminder of the Raft ordeal like that. I think it’s worse when I’m tired.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Nat asked when they paused for a granola bar snack and a bit of water.
I know what that phrase means. “I wish the...shakiness would go away entirely, that’s all. I’m just getting worried this bit won’t ever go away because it’s been so long and I really do feel so much better,” Wanda said honestly.
Natasha studied Wanda for only a second or two before deciding she was, in fact, telling the truth. “I don’t know, Wanda. From Clint’s description, you went through so many electric shocks that frankly I’m surprised you survived them. Your enhancements probably both saved your life and made you feel worse. It’s probably why you still get fatigued easily, too. Does it hurt? We can just stop here; it’s fine.”
“No.” Wanda shrugged and wrapped her arms around her middle after sticking the granola bar trash back in her backpack. “I’m okay. I just hate it. At least I can’t see the fading burn marks myself. I can see my hands shake and I can feel myself being tired. I still wish I could just forget about the Raft completely.” She didn’t look up, but she closed her eyes when her friend hugged her. Nat’s hugs always help. She should hug Yelena.
“I know you do.” Natasha didn’t say anything else. There was nothing to say after all; Wanda knew she was safe and no longer trapped in that hellhole, but that wasn’t going to make her completely forget what had happened, either.
Yelena watched her sister hugging Wanda and promptly looked away. “She is fine, Natasha,” she murmured. “Nobody ever cared for us after...things like you do her.”
“Maybe they should have,” Natasha said quietly.
“Melina would say you being soft on her and making her soft,” Yelena shot back, not meanly.
“Melina doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Wanda is fine just the way she is. There is no reason she should be unaffected by being tortured in that prison. There is no reason she shouldn’t say what’s bothering her, either. Not here.” A cool breeze rustled the grass, and Natasha quickly stood up.
Yelena looked away, blonde wisps falling out of her braid. “I know that. She is just herself. I still don’t know what myself is. Your weird enhanced friend knows her . She can tell you what is wrong with herself. She is just quiet and doesn’t, often.” Though she’d originally come up with this idea with Wanda so they could make Natasha happier, Yelena couldn’t help feeling angry and sad over the past anyway, and watching Wanda with her sister hurt. Whatever was wrong with Nat’s friend, she still had her very real emotions painted all over her. When Wanda was scared, it was all too obvious; when she was angry, she lashed out. “Obviously she’s justified in hurting.”
“You are a lively, blunt person that loves Nat to bits, and you pretend not to care about me, but you do,” Wanda told Yelena, and went on, “and you also love Melina and Alexei, but are angry with them for hurting you and Nat. Especially for letting you be separated. That is not my enhancements knowing that, to be clear. I’ve just noticed things.” She yanked a handful of grass and let the blades flutter away one by one. I can tell her that much. “And I think you really do enjoy the sparring part of...you know. You just hate what you were forced to do with those skills.”
Yelena didn’t react much; she just stared at Wanda for a moment before nodding. “None of that is wrong,” she said quietly.
I know. Wanda nodded and gave her a smile. “Well. Then you do know yourself also. Maybe you hurt inside differently. Not more or less.” I think that’s what Pietro would tell her, and me, too. We’re...okay. Okay enough. Okay enough to live and be able to be happy more of the time than not. She stood up and shrugged her backpack back on before glancing back at her friends- yes I have two friends with me, I’m not alone- she added to herself silently. “I can keep going, now.”
The three of them were quiet for awhile, but Wanda enjoyed that. This was the good kind of not talking, the kind that just meant nothing needed to be said. The cool air was a bit chilly to Wanda, so she tugged her hood up. Yelena gave her a puzzled look but didn’t question it.
A small flat area with soft grass beneath a few trees seemed like a nice mini campsite, so the trio decided to stop there to actually set up the tent. Wanda had been camping before with the Barton children, but she didn’t know how to set up tents, since back then she had been babysitting, not putting up the tents. Now she watched Nat and Yelena curiously, feeling somewhat awkward. “Can I help?”
“You can gather wood for a small fire so we can toast marshmallows,” Yelena suggested, not particularly wanting to explain how to set up a tent.
Wanda nodded and easily had a pile by the time the others had the tent set up. She laid out her borrowed sleeping bag where Nat told her to, noticing her friend had made sure to just put herself in the middle. This seemed very thoughtful and made Wanda smile. “I still don’t understand why this is an...on-purpose leisure thing to do,” she murmured truthfully, “but I do know I like knowing I have friends with me and that we don’t have to be cold or wet just because we’re outside.”
Yelena frowned, thinking that was an awfully strange thing to say. “Was exposure Hydra punishment or something?”
Wanda looked down at her hands and shook her head. “No. Pietro and me...we were just stuck outside often when we were little, after our parents died. If you took me in a city, I could survive outdoors there. I wouldn’t like it, but I know how. I don’t know how in the countryside or whatever so much.” I sound ridiculous. And why would Yelena think I was talking about a Hydra punishment?
But Yelena seemed nonplussed; she didn’t press for details and just nodded. “You and Pietro had different form of survival skills forced on you. Maybe not so bad until Hydra, but still unwanted skills.”
Wanda tugged off her boots and curled up inside her sleeping bag even though it was not even dinner time yet. “That’s...very accurate. I’m not even sure, thinking about it now, if Hydra was worse or better than being on the streets in Novi Grad.”
Natasha frowned at her. “You don’t have to talk about that, you know. We don’t mind listening, but don’t feel you have to, that’s all.”
“But you always say I should talk more. I feel like talking right now.”
Yelena laughed. “I think your weird enhanced friend knows you too well,” she teased, before giving Wanda a serious look again. “Hearing you talk makes me think it was different and not really better or worse than the street.”
Wanda shrugged slightly, burrowing further into the sleeping bag. “We should have just left the base after the initial experiments, that’s all. Volunteered and then left immediately. Both because we found out they were...not good people, and because they hurt us. I might not like being different, but I do like knowing I can protect myself. Pietro did too, but he also thought being enhanced made him...better than before, once he had figured out how to control it. I hated that he thought that, because he was special already.” I’m sure of it, now. Pietro and I could have defended ourselves fine. We should have left. We were just too scared.
I’m so tired. I feel safe here. I have friends with me, two friends, and I might be broken but I’m not useless, either. And I wish Vision was here. I would like a warm kiss or two and to let him hold me. That thought made her relax further even as her cheeks turned somewhat pink. It would be safe to sleep here.
Yelena glanced at Natasha, thinking Wanda was confusing. The enhanced girl’s feelings about the past made sense to her, but she didn’t understand why Wanda would say all of that and proceed to curl up with her back to her companions without waiting for a response. But it was all too obvious Wanda was falling asleep; her breathing grew slow and even, and an odd sense of tranquil exhaustion flowed from her. “Friend is tired,” Yelena said unnecessarily.
Natasha nodded, knowing quite well that Wanda was exhausted but felt safe and mostly happy at the moment. “Just let her sleep; don’t wake her up right now,” she answered, voice quiet. She did drape her own extra blanket over Wanda and the sleeping bag, knowing Wanda often grew cold easily, but Nat didn’t disturb her otherwise. Predictably Wanda didn’t react other than a contented sigh and scrunching further into the sleeping bag. Yes, you’re safe, Natasha thought to herself, but she didn’t say anything else aloud.
_______________
Wanda woke hours later to the smell of s’mores and hot dogs nearby. Nat and Yelena were not inside the tent, but she could hear them right outside. I’m glad I fell asleep. That means I got to rest and Nat was able to spend plenty of time with her sister without me being in the way. Rather than go investigate, Wanda turned over and stayed put. I like it here. I would still rather sleep indoors in a nice soft bed, but this is still much nicer than what Pietro and I had after we lost our little family apartment. And of course way, way better than being in that nasty prison.
Wanda put her hand over the soft wrap on the mostly-healed elbow and held her arm close. I don’t hurt all over anymore either. Even the not quite back to normal parts of me are okay . Not perfect, but...fine. She closed her eyes again, thinking it was a bit chilly, but also very much appreciating the warmth of being outside in chilly weather with appropriate clothes and blankets. Her cheeks and nose were cold, but the rest of her was toasty warm inside the sleeping bag.
And the sleeping bag was big enough that she didn’t feel weirdly tied up or restrained stuffed inside, either. All of a sudden she wanted to see Nat and Yelena and not just hear them though; hearing friends and not being able to see or feel them was very unpleasant when old horrible thoughts poked at her. I don’t have to. I am not there, I’m not stuck across that cell block aisle where none of my teammates could get to me.
Wanda scrambled out of the tent with Nat’s extra blanket around her shoulders and resettled herself beside her friend without offering an explanation.
Natasha gave Wanda a sideways glance that asked are you okay ?, but she didn’t say anything aloud. Wanda nodded, and Nat didn’t press. She did, however, offer Wanda a warm s’more, which Wanda accepted with a quiet thank-you.
After nibbling the melty delicious snack, Wanda picked her way into the trees just beyond their small campsite clearing. Knowing she was not going to get any of them caught here, she lifted herself a good twenty feet into a tree with her powers and settled in the crook of a branch. I do like it out here. Maybe this is why Nat and Yelena wanted to come.
“Where did your friend go?” Yelena asked Nat.
Nat laughed. “And you thought she couldn’t be discreet. She’s up a tree.” Natasha pointed where Wanda sat perched in the shadows, her dyed-red hair the only obvious sign of where she was.
Wanda waved at them but stayed put.
_________________
When they all settled into the tent and zipped it closed against the chilly night air, Wanda finally spoke up about what she had been mulling over all evening, especially while sitting safely perched in her tree. “Nat, I don’t want to put my suit back on, at least not anytime soon, but I do want to go volunteer somewhere like I mentioned before. And I do not want to do it while I’m here because that risks your family’s safety. I have been all...scared and hurt long enough. I know I can do that much. I’m strong enough by now, at least.”
“We can go to Moscow,” Natasha answered immediately. “That’s far enough away from Saint Petersburg, and I do have another safe house there. Safe, very small, apartment, rather. It’s in a high rise. What did you want to do exactly right now?”
Wanda scrunched further down into her sleeping bag. “I want to help orphans like me and Pietro were,” she said softly. “That’s all. I don’t care how, but if possible I would like to be able to help them directly.” I think that’s reasonable. I like being around children. If I can help any lonely scared ones like Pietro and I were, even if it’s just one...that’s enough.
“You can’t tell the children who you are,” Nat warned, knowing Wanda was very likely to get easily attached to any little kids she might volunteer with.
“I know.” I’m not stupid, Wanda thought but didn’t add.
“Then I think we can get something arranged.”
“Good. I...thank you. I know I don’t have connections to set anything like that up myself, so I really appreciate it. Thank you, Nat.” Wanda fell asleep feeling quite satisfied and ready for the new day to come, something more than welcome to her after weeks in that horrible underwater prison and then weeks more recovering and just feeling... stuck, not knowing what to do . Now she had an actual plan, and while she knew it couldn’t be permanent, it was still a big deal to her. Time to move on. I might not be able to forget, but I can at least do something.
I have plans now. And it will be good for Nat to leave Melina’s, too. She can always come back to visit if she wants.
Notes:
Hopefully next chapter will come faster than this one did lol! Next time: a location change for Nat and Wanda, a new position for Wanda, check-in with Sam and Steve, and another short visit from Vision:)
Any kudos/comments are much appreciated!