Chapter Text
Sapnap woke you up, a look of worry on his face.
“Someone robbed us in the night!” He told you.
You got up quickly, looking at what was taken.
Practically everything expensive was stolen, like your ring.
Sapnap opened up his closet, grabbed a pair of brass knuckles, and took his phone out.
“I knew this would happen so in that little ring you had? I put a tracker in case you got kidnapped. Only I can kidnap you.” He told you, smugly.
He tracked the ring to a house 5 miles away.
“Let’s go, sweetheart.” He said to you, motioning his head to the front door.
He hopped into the car and as soon as you got in the car and closed the door, your seatbelt not even on, he started the car and drove off as hard as he could.
You quickly got your seatbelt on and looked over at the speedometer. It was reaching 30, 50, 70, 90.
You saw your life flash past your eyes as he drove past numerous people, not speaking and he looked unamused.
The car stopped in front of the house. You wondered how he didn’t hit anyone while he was driving.
He opened his door and opened yours to let you out.
He allowed you to take your hand into his and he helped you out.
As soon as the door closed, he was thinking of how he should torture the robber.
“Maybe I’ll strip him of his skin?” He asked himself.
While he was doing that, you were trying to open the door.
As you rammed into the door, hoping your weight would bust it open, you fell backwards and fell on your back.
Sapnap crouched down and placed his hand on your stomach.
“You okay?” He asked.
“Yeah.” You replied.
“Need some help, darling?” He offered you a hand to get up then walked up to the door.
He pulled a lockpick out of his pocket and tried to pick the lock.
The lockpick broke. Sapnap then looked under the doormat and found the key.
“Kind of stupid to put your key under the mat if someone’s trying to get in that has an IQ higher than a spoon.” He spoke, the door already unlocked.
He kicked the door open and walked inside, brass knuckles at the ready.
You could tell he was alert, despite the fact that no one seemed to be home.
He looked around at the pictures.
Sapnap picked up a picture, looking at the robber's family.
“Another mother to marry.” He told himself.
“No offense.” Sapnap said to you, turning away from the picture.
He cracked the picture in his fist and walked away.
Surprisingly, the things he stole were on the table, in plain sight.
“This guy is stupid.” Sapnap told himself, laughing.
He grabbed the items and walked out.
“We shouldn’t and can’t be here longer than we need to.”
You followed him out the door and as you two drove home at a slow speed, you both loudly sang music together.
But at one point, you were pretty sure he was quoting his own criminal record.
“Wait, are you a criminal?” You asked him.
“Uh, yeah. I literally kidnapped you, killed my father, tossed my dog in the oven, I could go on. And those are the charges that haven’t been put on there.” He said, confused that you didn’t know.
“Hot.” You said.
“Excuse me?” He asked, glaring at you.
“Hot.” You repeated.
Sapnap took his eyes off the road and kissed you on the lips.
As you both went home, you were speechless, paying attention to every word he said.