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Unknown Variable

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If there is anything Loid Forger has learned over the years, it’s that no good can come out of forming attachments. His line of work makes it virtually impossible, not to mention dangerous. People become weak when they form relationships with others. He’s seen it happen to other members of his field on rare occasions. He’s heard stories about agents falling for their mark, and how they’d ended up jeopardizing an entire mission as a result.

However, Loid has never had any issues with this aspect of his profession. He has dedicated his life to his job, and has never allowed himself to let anything or anyone distract him from his main objective.


There are many factors that may be affecting Loid’s inability to be completely…rational around Yor Forger. Operation Strix has already proven to be one of Loid’s most unpredictable missions yet, far surpassing any government scheme or heist mission he’s had to undergo. Humans are unpredictable in and of themselves, which is why Loid has always been wary of missions that require him to establish a romantic connection with his mark.

And Yor? Yor is an unknown variable.

Loid knows that there is no reason for him to become romantically involved with Yor. In fact, there is no reason for him to cultivate any feelings for her at all. They have an arrangement that they’ve both agreed on—an arrangement that just so happens to require them to live together with a child under the guise of being married. There is no reason for feelings to get involved, for Loid to get to know Yor beyond a fundamental level –in fact, it would only complicate things.

And yet.

When Loid closes his eyes at night, his mind—completely against his will, he must add—decides to remember the feeling of Yor kicking him hard, over and over, sending shockwaves throughout his entire body with the force of it. He remembers the feeling of her fists connecting with his forearms, and her expression, heady and angry and intense, the look in her eyes sending shivers throughout his entire body that have nothing to do with fear.

Loid is simply…intrigued by her strength. That had to be it. Yor has expressed in the past that she has a background in self-defense, one that is seemingly more extensive than Loid had previously imagined. It was natural, as a spy, to take notice of a person’s—ahem, strengths—in order to protect oneself in kind.

Nothing good can come out of seeing Yor as anything other than a pseudo-wife and an unsuspecting partner in crime. Despite a few hiccups, things are proceeding (somewhat) according to plan. And Loid intends to keep things that way.


Getting Anya into Eden College was no easy feat, but Loid rests somewhat easier knowing that his preparations have been paying off. Anya is staying the night at Becky’s (and is very excited to do so), and so, Becky’s limousine picks Anya up right from the Forger’s doorstep.

However, this change in routine brought about something Loid didn’t prepare for—spending most of the day alone with Yor.

Yor has a rare day off from her civil servant job, and Loid doesn’t need to check-in with The Handler until later that evening. Yor is still in her home clothes and this is proving…difficult.

Yor is cleaning up the kitchen—something she insists on doing, despite Loid’s protests, because Loid cooks all of the family’s meals—and she’s humming to herself, her hair pulled up into a high ponytail and held back by a white headband. Loid can see the muscles in her exposed calves shift as she sweeps the floor, her black leggings sleek and tight, her soft blue t-shirt—the same brand as Loid’s own, he bought them in bulk—snug around her chest.

Loid shouldn’t be looking. There’s no reason to. But he can’t look away.

Loid opens up volume 12 of Spy Wars and skims over the first page. He can feel Yor’s presence on the other end of the room like a prickling at the back of his neck. Yor sighs softly, and it sounds like music. Loid reads the same line in the comic ten times.

He just needs to talk to her, and establish a sense of normalcy. He just needs to talk to her, and remind himself that Yor is just a person, not delightfully strange and strong and unattainable, someone out of reach.

After a moment of careful contemplation, Loid silently gets out of his chair and makes his way into the kitchen. Yor is currently facing away from him, her humming somewhat loud and off-key as she wipes at a stain on the kitchen counter with a washcloth. Loid comes up to her, slowly, and taps her on the shoulder.


Loid barely has a chance to speak before Yor whips around, moving in close so that the side of her hip is flush with Loid’s. She grips Loid’s shoulder hard and pushes, hooking her leg around his ankle to sweep him off his feet—

Loid is just barely able to lift his head up and bend his arms and legs as he falls, but it doesn't matter in the end—because Yor, wide-eyed in realization—grips the back of Loid’s head just in time, her knees falling on either side of his hips as they both fall to the ground.


The room is silent for a moment, and Loid’s head is spinning, a million scenarios running through his head in the time it takes for Yor to lift her head from the crook of his shoulder. Was Yor purposely trying to attack him? If so, why did she end up breaking his fall? Is she an enemy of WISE after all? Did she somehow slip through the cracks, despite Loid’s investigative efforts?

Has he been compromised—

“Loid-san!” Yor says again, loud enough to break Loid out of his stupor, tears starting to slip down her cheeks as she cradles Loid’s head in her hands, checking for injuries. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t hear you come up behind me, I thought you were an intruder—”

Oh. That’s a more probable conclusion.

Loid takes in Yor’s pink cheeks, her devastated expression, and the gentle way in which her hands are skating across his skin in concern for his well-being, and decides that even the greatest spy in the world couldn’t artificially manufacture that level of caring, no matter how deep undercover they were.

And that level of concern…affects him, in the worst possible way.

Because, although Yor has lifted the top half of her body off of Loid, the same can’t be said for her lower half. To be precise, her lower half is currently sitting on Loid’s lower half in a very compromising manner.

Loid Forger has gotten himself into many strange situations in his life of espionage, but this one may take the cake for the strangest. And the most...

Loid forces himself to make eye contact with Yor despite the fact that she’s currently sitting directly on his erection. It’s not often that he finds himself at a loss for words. And yet.







“Allow me to explain–”

“It’s alright!” Yor says finally, still not making any effort to get off of Loid—not that Loid has made any attempt to move either. “It’s…it’s alright, Loid-san. It’s…it’s normal.”

Yor’s hands are resting solidly on Loid’s chest. She grips his t-shirt with her fingers until the collar stretches.

Something else that Loid has noticed when he—occasionally—thinks about Yor is the way her eyes seem to transform whenever she has a specific goal in mind. There’s a spark there, an intoxicating mix of calmness and cold intent that overtakes her features. And that expression is present now, and accompanied by a bright red blush and something else, something Loid has only seen when Yor witnesses a particularly violent scene in a movie or admires a “well-made knife.”

It’s something that Loid hates that he likes, and now that that expression is directed towards him, he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to get enough of it.

Yor…” Loid whispers, in a voice that’s breathy and soft and doesn’t sound like him at all.

“It’s normal, Loid-san. It’s normal…” Yor says softly, before rocking her hips slowly, pressing down against Loid’s clothed cock—

Fuck—Yor-san—” Loid huffs out as a jolt of pleasure runs through his body all at once, because it’s been so long since he’s been touched before and it’s always been for work, it’s never been like this— Yor’s face is bright red now and the tears are just starting to dry on her cheeks but she’s focused now, keeping up a steady rhythm with her hips, her hands starting to travel underneath Loid’s shirt to explore the bare skin there.

“Do you want this, darling?” Yor whispers, and the sound of it, darling, causes Loid to grit his teeth to stop himself from lifting his hips up into Yor’s touch, because he has to maintain some semblance of control.

Yor is soaked through her leggings, Loid can feel it each time she grinds against his cock, lined up perfectly, letting out soft huffs of breath as she presses her fingers into Loid’s skin, reaching his nipples and starting to pinch and play with the skin there.

Loid can barely speak, all of his efforts going into keeping himself composed, his hands balled into fists next to him as Yor leans in and presses a soft kiss on Loid’s lips. “You have to tell me, Loid-san. Tell me—”

“I…I want it,” Loid says finally, and it’s so easy to say. It’s so easy to let go, just for this.

Yor works fast then, gripping the hem of Loid’s shirt and pulling it off before lifting her own shirt over her head—and Loid pauses, his heart caught in his throat as he takes in the sight of Yor’s soft skin, the plushness around her stomach, and her breasts, full and round and encased in a black lacy bra, and fuck it can barely hold them, they’re spilling out ever so slightly over the top of the cups and Loid brings his hands up to Yor’s waist and he looks up at her, asking for permission.

Yor nods, and Loid brings his hands up, unclasping her bra in one swift movement and watching as her breasts are freed, and he proceeds to lose his ability to function in that moment, his mind deliciously blank, his mouth hanging open.

“Go ahead, Loid-san,” Yor giggles, her mouth upturned before she leans down toward Loid’s waiting mouth.

And fuck, Yor is so soft and warm in his mouth, and Loid focuses on kissing and sucking on the soft skin of her breast before lapping at her nipple and taking it into his mouth, holding her other breast in his hand as he worships them—Yor is fumbling with Loid’s buttons before she finally pulls his pants off, slipping her leggings down her thighs and tossing them somewhere on the ground before continuing her slow grind.

Do you like it?” Yor says, out of breath, and she sounds dangerous but Loid doesn’t care, because Yor is grinding her wet pussy against Loid’s cock, coating it with her, and everything is slick and wet and Yor is warm in his mouth and he never wants this to end.

Please—” Loid moans, releasing Yor’s breast from his mouth so he can lean up and kiss her fully—their mouths meld together, sloppy and slick, and Loid can feel the slow drag of Yor’s clit against his cock, feels the way she shivers at the friction. “Yor…”

Yor quickens her hips, and Loid’s hands travel down to her ass to help her along—Yor sits up so she can grind against Loid’s cock properly, and Loid thinks he must have failed his mission and gone to heaven because his cock catches around Yor’s tight hole every time she brings her hips down, her breasts slick with Loid’s spit and her hands pressed against his hard chest for traction as she uses him to make herself feel good—

“You’re good, Loid-san….” Yor says, and her eyes are shut tight as rocks her hips and presses Loid’s hard cock against his navel and grinds against it, and she’s so wet that she’s dripping along the length of him, mixing with his pre and running down along his abs and down his cock as she chases her release. Loid groans, his cock twitching each time Yor grinds against it, his abs clenching as he feels himself get close to the edge– “You’re doing so well…

Yor-san–I think I—

Good job, Loid-san—come with me—

And Loid wraps his arms around Yor’s waist, and she leans down and their mouths meet in a sloppy kiss, their teeth clanging slightly, tongues caressing each other as they finally enter free fall together.

The house is silent for a moment. It’s all Loid can do to breathe into Yor’s mouth, their legs tangled together. When Yor finally lifts her head up, she looks like the Yor that Loid knows well, her blush all pink and her expression tentative as if she didn’t just rearrange Loid’s world completely, as if she didn’t just break Loid apart only to put him back together again.

“I’ll make sure to announce myself when I approach next time,” Loid says after the silence, deadpan, and Yor giggles, resting her head in the crook of his shoulder.

Maybe you shouldn’t, Loid-san~

She’s going to kill me. Loid thinks, softly caressing Yor's back as they come back down to earth.