Chapter Text
She brought up the subject two days later in the shop.
“So, how’d apologizing to Ashley go?”
Tim glared at her from the driver’s seat before he eyed the time on the dashboard. If only criminals would be punctual when showing up to their meets, but they had been sitting in front of this gas station for 15 minutes now waiting for this drug dealer to show.
“What makes you think I apologized?”
“Uh, because you’re a guy who wants to keep his girlfriend?” she threw back at him.
She was right about that.
“It went fine,” he admitted. “I said I’d try to be more open to new things. We went out the other night and I let her pick anything she wanted.”
“What’d she pick?”
Tim mumbled something under his breath as he adjusted the laptop that didn’t need adjusting. Lucy pretended to cup her ear and leaned in closer to him, waiting for his response. Rolling his eyes at her, he confessed, “There was some lantern festival at the beach.”
Lucy burst into laughter, and Tim couldn’t help but smile reluctantly at the sound of it. It was a beautiful sound, her laugh, the way it bounced around the shop and made him feel more calm and lighter. Made him feel like he had achieved something by making her laugh, like he deserved a trophy to memorialize his success.
But less so when she was laughing at him, which she was definitely doing right now.
“Men,” Lucy commented with a knowing sigh when her giggles finally subsided.
“Look who’s talking,” Tim pointed out immediately. “You acting all impressed by Sanford trying goat curry when I know for a fact that you eat weird stuff like eel, and goat liver, and… mushrooms.”
“Mushrooms aren’t weird, Tim,” Lucy repeated for what might have been the hundredth time in their relationship. But she did look abashed at his astute observation and bit her lower lip in embarrassment. “Was it that obvious?”
Tim threw a wide-eyed duh expression her way, and she groaned at the clear judgment on his face. “I know!” She covered her face with her hands for a moment to try and hide her humiliation, then turned his way to explain. “I hated myself the second I did it but… I haven’t been on a date in ages! Not since Emmett, and then a couple Tinder dates after that, but ever since Jackson-” She took a deep breath, pushed past the grief and carried on. “I haven’t cared enough to get excited about dating again. Chris seems nice enough after the initial misunderstanding we had about that kid. And you forced me into it, so I figured why not make it work?”
“Didn’t he call you dramatic?”
“I am dramatic!!”
“Don’t I know it,” Tim agreed with a low chuckle.
But after more than a year of getting to know her, he realized he wouldn’t condescendingly describe her as dramatic like he previously would have. She’s… unusually passionate. Whether it’s about stopping animal cruelty, voting rights, organ donation, or any of the other five dozen things she gets worked up about… he’s never found someone who cares so much about so many things.
Sure, he finds it exhausting, but he also finds it admirable.
But he’d never tell her that.
“Just… be yourself. If he doesn’t like you because of the questionable stuff you eat, he’s an idiot.”
Lucy smiled at him brightly and he ignored the sensation. He figured it’s the least he can say as her friend since he did rope Chris along.
He was right though. She is sweet on him.
“Thank you for that,” Lucy told him, “but yeah, I came clean to him at dinner the other night.”
“What night?” Tim asked sharply before he could even register the change in his tone.
They went out again? Already?
“The night after the double date. He found me and said that’s not how he imagined our first date going, so we went out for dinner again, just the two of us.”
“Oh, that’s… good.”
“Plus, it was kinda my fault for egging you on with the control freak comment and you determined to prove a point,” she admitted with a apologetic grimace on her face.
“Yes, yes, it was,” he agreed quickly, happy to assign her the blame. “Entirely your fault.”
“I’m sorry!” Lucy laughed. “Why is everything a bet with us? It’s so—”
Hot.
It’s the first word that came to Tim’s mind and he nearly jolted in his seat with the impact of it. He clenched his jaw to control the shock of the realization, his fingers tightening around his water bottle as he quickly regained control of his senses.
Absolutely not.
Completely unprofessional.
That’s not what he meant at all.
It’s Lucy.
“— juvenile,” Lucy concluded with a sigh. “Which is fine for me because I’m young and youthful, but you should know better.” She reached across the front console to poke his shoulder playfully, grinning when he scowled and brushed her hand away.
“‘Young’ and ‘youthful’ both mean the same thing,” he told her, “and I’m not that much older than you.”
“Sure, you tell yourself that. You probably had to stop for a burger on the way home after dinner, didn’t you? You complained about the portions the entire time.”
Tim didn’t say anything to confirm or deny her theory, instead choosing to stare in concentration at the convenience store they’re staking out, as if anything had changed in the last 25 minutes.
“Didn’t you?” Lucy asked again, and he rolled his eyes in annoyance because dammit, she knows him so well.
Too well.
“Burger and fries,” he mumbled under his breath.
He tried to ignore her as she laughed at him again.
Lucy didn’t realize how long she had been smiling at her phone until she missed Chris’ first question entirely.
“Hm, what?” She caught him peering at her over the ridge of his smoothie. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—” She shook her head in apology and put her phone down on the table before Chris stopped her with a wave of his hand.
“No, no, it’s fine. We’ve been here three hours already,” he said with a grin, “you’re allowed to check your messages. Did you get good news?”
“I- oh- it’s my dog, or he was my dog,” Lucy elaborated as she unlocked her phone and showed him the picture of Kojo with the new chew toy she’d gotten him last week. “He’s on a hike.”
“He’s cute,” Chris commented at the photo, mouth curling into a smile. His eyes flickered up to the name at the top of the text window before he looked across the table to meet Lucy’s gaze. “Tim? He has your old dog?”
“It’s a long story,” Lucy began, unsure why she sounded so defensive all of a sudden. They had been at this food and music festival all morning but suddenly the warmth of the spring sunshine felt prickly against her bare arms. The background music became a dull roar as she hurried to explain, hoping she was choosing the right words. Because she knew how it would come across if she chose the wrong ones. “My roommate and I at the time—”
“Jackson,” Chris said, and Lucy nodded before continuing.
“We really couldn’t handle a dog, especially when we were still rookies. I was a little too eager to adopt him, but thankfully Tim wanted the company.”
Chris stared at her thoughtfully, and Lucy tried to resist shifting nervously in her seat like she’s on the witness stand. She wondered if that feeling came to mind because Chris was a lawyer, or if it said something about this burgeoning relationship in general. It wasn’t a good sign that she felt like a suspect struggling to find the least incriminating words to defend herself. She pushed away the bad omen, and hoped her face didn’t give her worries away.
But Chris was much better at waiting out silence than her, given his profession. Lucy arched an eyebrow at him and asked, “What?” She reached for the last of the chips and fresh guacamole they had been sharing, munching quietly as if she wasn’t at all nervous about what he was going to say.
“Sharing a dog. That seems—”
“Weird?”
“Intimate.”
Lucy tried not to choke on the food in her mouth, only managing to save face by clearing her throat at the last minute. She shook her head and waved her hand as if she could physically move away the word that’s taking up space between them: intimate. It felt like a loaded gun, something she had to disarm and dispose of immediately. Because the connotations of that word… that word and Tim…. no. No. Those connotations do not exist, not at all. He was her colleague. Her boss. Her partner. Her friend, on the days that he was willing to admit it.
“What? No, no,” she laughed, hoping her cheeks weren’t turning red under Chris’ watchful gaze. “I mean, I have none of the responsibilities of a dog owner. Just the perks of dropping off fun new chew toys and getting some doggy cuddles when I’m feeling low. None of the costs, all of the rewards,” she finished with a wide grin.
Chris nodded as he took another gulp of his drink, his dark eyes continuing to observe her carefully. “Do you guys hang out a lot? Outside of work, I mean?”
Lucy shook her head. “No way. Twelve hour shifts in the shop all week long is all I can take. I might tag along on a hike if I don’t have plans once in a blue moon, but well, today I have plans with you.” She reached across the table for Chris’ hand, relieved when he met her halfway and entwined their fingers together.
“Okay. I don’t wanna get in the middle if there’s something goin’ on between—”
“There is a love affair between me and my former dog, yes, and you have tough competition because did you see his eyes? And that big goofy smile?”
Despite the lightness of her words, Lucy squeezed Chris’ fingers, her thumb stroking the back of his hand in what she hoped he would read as reassurance. She needed him to understand exactly how sincere she was being, and how nice it was to have someone to call and meet at the end of a stressful day. It had been too long since someone wanted her - emotionally and physically. Too long since someone accepted everything about her, the good, the bad, and the ugly. She hadn’t shared any of the “ugly” scars of her past yet — he assumed the DOD tattoo was simply a part of her eclectic collection — but maybe someday she would.
As long as he stuck around.
Chris must have believed the honesty in her voice because he stood and tugged her up from her seat, closing the distance between them to brush his lips against hers, once, then twice. It was soft and sweet, and it was all Lucy wanted to cling to in a world that had shifted lopsided since the moment she couldn’t find Jackson at the wedding venue.
“I saw a cupcake stall by the exit. Shall we?”
Lucy smiled brightly at him as she adjusted her crossbody strap over her tank top and grabbed the container of their chips and guac.
“We shall.”
It happened at the end of a FaceTime call with Genny, the moment where Tim couldn’t ignore the unspoken question anymore because someone had finally put it into words.
He, Ashley, and Genny were having a nice enough call as he and Ashley worked together to finish getting dinner ready. It was only the second time the women had talked but at least they had moved on from the basics like the weather and how was your day. Today they talked about Genny’s kids, and how Ashley and Jerry wanted to downsize their home in the current market.
“It’s such a big step, you know?” Ashley commented as she cleared the counter and arranged all the dirty dishes in the sink.
“Oh, I know, saying goodbye to your childhood home is emotional.” Genny’s eyes met Tim’s but he remained quiet on the subject so she continued. “But I’m sure the upkeep is tough for your dad at his age.”
“Completely,” Ashley nodded. “I’m thinking he might have fun personalizing something smaller that isn’t falling apart.”
“That’s a safe bet.” When there was a loud sound of clear chaos from her end of the call, Genny groaned and apologized to her big brother and his girlfriend. “I gotta go, I’m sure someone ate the last popsicle and it’s World War III out there.”
“Why didn’t you just buy more popsicles?” Tim teased. “You need me to send you popsicle money for the kids?”
“I was going to, but I didn’t consider it an essential on my grocery list this week like say, milk or eggs or actual food.”
“Your own fault.”
Genny rolled her eyes at Tim’s teasing before turning to Ashley with a bright smile. “It was so nice talking to you again. Maybe we can meet up next month when I bring the kids into town for Spring Break?”
Exchanging a quick glance with Tim, Ashley nodded eagerly. “I’d love that. Have a good night.”
“You too. Tim, tell Lucy I said hi and thank her for the social issues list she sent me. I want to see her when I visit too!!”
Based on the way he and Ashley went completely still at the words, Tim would later swear the air in the kitchen felt like it dropped twenty degrees. All he could hear was the hum of the refrigerator and the quiet drip drip drip of the water filter. He sensed Ashley staring at him even as he held himself back from looking her way. But he had been married long enough to know they’re going to be talking about it, whatever it is, as soon as the phone call finished.
“Tim? You there?”
“Yeah, I’m still here,” he answered quickly, grabbing his phone from the counter so it was just him and Genny looking at each other through their screens. “I’ll tell her. Or you could text her yourself.”
“Or I might forget and crash after the kids are in bed, and you’ll see her in less than ten hours.”
Tim hummed vaguely at her correct assumption before deciding to add one last thing. He couldn’t be sure if what he said next was purely for Ashley’s benefit, but it felt that way as he avoided looking her way and chose his words carefully. “You didn’t have to reach out to her. I could’ve helped with anything you needed-“
“Yeah, because you just love to brainstorm topics for my fourth grade social studies class,” Genny joked with a loud laugh. “Lucy’s brilliant at this stuff. You know, she really should’ve stayed in school, she’s way too smart to be partnered up with you.”
“Okay, I’m hanging up now.”
“I’m kidding! I love you! Good night!”
Pocketing his phone, Tim turned his attention back to his plate, adding a spoonful of veggies next to the salmon he’d thrown on the grill. He hoped his posture adeptly hid the sense of foreboding he was feeling regarding the conversation that was sure to start any minute now.
When he finally looked up, Ashley was staring at him accusingly, waiting for him to say something, anything.
“What?” he asked, then winced immediately at his own stupidity.
“Tim,” she exclaimed with a ragged sigh, shaking her head in disbelief. “Are we finally going to talk about it?”
“Talk about what?”
“About Lucy. About you and Lucy.” She gestured at him helplessly like she was at a complete loss how to explain what he couldn’t see.
“There is no ‘me and Lucy’,” Tim replied firmly, ignoring the feeling of panic beginning to churn in his stomach. It felt like the walls were closing in on him, as if the whole house had shrunk and Ashley was looming over him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“There’s chemistry between you two,” Ashley elaborated, her brows furrowed in confusion as if he was deliberately being difficult. “Do you not see that? Everyone sees it.”
“That doesn’t make any sense!” He couldn’t tell if the fact that he was raising his voice, sounding downright dramatic and unlike his usual self, startled him or Ashley more. He never got like this, not about anything except the Rams or the Dodgers or the Lakers. He took a deep breath and began again, his voice in complete control this time.
“She’s my aide. We work together, that’s all.”
“I can’t tell if you’re trying to convince me or yourself,” Ashley commented wryly, her voice tense as she watched him with accusing eyes. “You know, my dad mentioned it.”
“He mentioned what?”
“I… he… he was surprised when you asked me out.”
“Now you’re saying your dad doesn’t like me?”
“Oh, stop it,” she snapped bitterly, and Tim went silent from the shock of her scathing tone. He had never heard her sound like that in the months they’ve been together. Ashley never raised her voice, always soft-spoken and polite. Even her laugh was at a low decibel as if not to let it linger after the joke.
“You know he adores you. And I’ve been on enough crappy dates since my engagement ended that I jumped at the chance to date an actual good guy. Which you are. But Dad was surprised. He mentioned that you and Lucy have a bond, that everyone in the station knows you’re close.”
“I… that’s…” Tim grappled with a wave of frustration, finding himself annoyed by the precinct gossip that he had always found annoying and unprofessional. He never cared about Smitty’s latest girlfriend, or if Rodriguez and Carlson are “on” or “off” again, or if Sweeney finally filed for divorce. Yet here he was, being mentioned in the same spin cycle that he actively tried to avoid. Especially avoid it in terms of a ‘him and Lucy’. “Our bond is that we work together.”
“So nothing’s ever happened between you two?” Ashley’s voice was curious, and Tim hurried to answer the question quickly, shaking his head emphatically and honestly.
That was an easy one.
“Never.”
“And,” she took a deep breath as if bracing herself for the next answer, “you’ve never wanted something to happen?”
In the millisecond of an interval where his nervous system worked to relay the message of what word he needed to say, Tim flashed back to a lingering hug and the way Lucy had looked at him in his living room when their entire world had spun on its axis. It was the way she seemed to fit against his chest and under his chin, like they were two puzzle pieces who had finally found each other. That was the memory that made his heart beat faster even as he guarded his expression and controlled his breathing when facing his girlfriend.
“No. Never,” he replied fervently to Ashley.
He could barely swallow his dinner through the weight of the lie.
Tim was in the middle of his second page detailing the scene when a gentle hand on his shoulder made him jump in surprise. It was a testament to the day they’d had and the scene he was troubled by that he didn’t manage to hide his reaction to Lucy’s out-of-uniform appearance. His eyes widened as he took in her smoky eyes and red lip, a tight figure-hugging black dress that showed off more cleavage than he’d ever seen, than he’d ever had a right to look at.
“Wow. You look… nice.”
“Thanks,” she smiled shyly, hugging her jean jacket tighter around her as she took the seat next to his desk. “I’m waiting for Chris. You doin’ okay?” She glanced at the paperwork visible on the desk, the multiple pages of his neat blocky handwriting. It was an usual sight considering he never wrote more than a page.
When she looked up at him, her eyes kind and knowing, he didn’t bother lying. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face in frustration, revealing more weakness than he usually would. But after a day like today, he didn’t have the energy to use the ‘tough guy’ card.
“I’m making sure this bastard never sees his kids again,” he said vehemently.
“And he won’t,” Lucy assured him. “That scene we walked into, that poor woman… him waving that gun around, the kids sharing about the abuse and drinking… he’s going away for a long time, Tim.”
“He better be,” Tim muttered under his breath.
He struggled to hide the emotion he was feeling. But eventually, keeping the mask on seemed too exhausting, and well, Lucy was familiar with all his demons anyway. He was sure she could read into every angry line on his face. She reached out and touched his forearm lightly, tapping her fingers against his skin. He felt the cool band of the ring that she always wore, and couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the white, cloudy moonstone as it lay against his skin. That ring had been the answered prayer of guidance to retrieve her from an unmarked grave. He forced himself to look up, arching an eyebrow when he found her softly smiling at him.
“Come on, Tim, go home. Snuggle on the couch with Kojo and Ashley. Watch a comfort movie.”
“I don’t have a comfort movie.” When she stared at him in disbelief, he added, “Well, maybe Die Hard.”
She laughed at him, and like always, the sound made Tim feel a little lighter, making him smile even when he didn’t want to. After a case like today, he didn’t think he’d be smiling for a few days, but of course Lucy lived to prove him wrong.
“Ashley’s out with friends tonight,” he added, then shook his head at himself for volunteering that unnecessary detail.
“You want me to stay a while?” she asked, and he shook his head. “I don’t mind.”
“No, no, you’re going out. Have fun.”
“We’re going to meet Chris’ brother and sister-in-law for dinner.”
“Wow. Already?”
“I know,” Lucy said nervously, eyes revealing panic for a split second. “It seems too soon, right? Is it too soon?”
“No, no—”
“I mean, it’s nice. It’s just we’ve only been going out for like, two months and—”
“No, it’s not too soon. I mean,” Tim paused before weighing his words, looking at every curve of her face he had memorized by now, then decided to finish his sentence, “not if he really likes you.”
And how could anyone not like Lucy?
She beamed at him gratefully before exhaling deeply. “Thank you. Sorry for the mini-freak out. God… I really miss Jackson for pre-date freak-outs.” She smiled at him sadly and he nodded in understanding. It was still strange sometimes, when he would see Lucy alone around the station without the younger officer at her side. The two had been thick as thieves, always talking in the hallways and catching each other up on their day during lunch.
“He was a good kid.”
“The best,” Lucy emphasized. She stood up from her seat but hesitated at his side a split second longer. “You sure? I don’t mind—”
“Lucy. Go.”
“Okay, going. Go home, Tim, good night.” With one last smile his way, she left.
Tim wondered why he always felt a little more lonely after she disappeared from his side. Lucy would say something about auras and warmth and people’s chi energies colliding and molding together, making it harder and harder to separate the bond between two people.
Tim thought it was simply because of how well they worked together, how much time they had spent together on shifts the last year and a half.
You would get used to someone who was always at your side. Anybody would, whoever they are.
That’s all it is.
She hit ignore the first time the call came through because after all, she is on duty fighting crime. Plus, Tim would silently but loudly judge her for taking personal calls like he used to during their TO-and-rookie year.
But then her cousin Eddie texted 911 for real, and that’s not a cop joke, pick up, Lucy decided to call back. After all, Eddie knew better than to make a 911 joke if it’s not something that can’t wait until after shift.
“Let me make a call real quick,” she said to Tim from across the picnic table where they had been eating lunch. It was a nice day, spring was finally around the corner, and Lucy had managed to convince him to eat out of the shop and enjoy the view. After all, visible police presence is important in the community, she reminded him. He’d rolled his eyes and given in.
“Eddie, what is it?” Lucy asked her cousin, then quieted immediately as she listened to the news he relayed. She inhaled sharply, unable to hide her emotions as Tim focused his entire attention on her, not bothering to be subtle about it. She blinked rapidly to stop the flood of tears, sniffling as she turned away from his probing gaze.
When she tried to look away, Tim dropped the fork he was holding and reached out to grab her hand, squeezing it in solidarity. His vivid blue eyes roamed her face, letting her know she was not alone, no matter what it was. Lucy gave him a watery smile of thanks, squeezing his hand and soaking in the comfort of his presence. She nodded at the rest of the news Eddie shared over the call, thanking him and hanging up with a sniffling sigh. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself before she faced Tim and her half-eaten burrito bowl.
“Lucy?” His voice was firm as he commanded her attention and she felt like a rookie all over again as she automatically met his stare. It was like her body didn’t know how to refute an order from him at a time of crisis. “What happened?”
“Apparently they... um, they found a lump in my mom’s breast and she had surgery to remove it this morning. He… he thought I should know.”
“Oh.” There was a long pause before he asked, “You haven’t talked to her since—”
“Since I told her I didn’t want to freeze my eggs? Nope.” Lucy took a deep breath, putting the lid on her half eaten lunch and moving to the trash can to throw it away. “Let’s go, lunch time’s over.”
Fifteen minutes of silence later, Tim looked over to find her staring idly out the window. She was sniffling occasionally and biting her lower lip as if that would hold back the emotions threatening to burst through.
“Lucy,” Tim turned to her when they stopped at a red light, “should we go to the hospital?”
She looked his way and shook her head quickly. “No, no. She doesn’t want me there, obviously. If she had, she would’ve told me. It’s fine.”
“Okay. But do you want to go to the hospital?” She looked up at him, eyes stormy with indecision and heartbreak, and Tim felt a flash of protectiveness he had no right feeling. He held her gaze, ignoring the light turning green. No one would dare honk at a police car. “What do you want to do, Lucy?”
“I… yes, the hospital. Let’s go.”
“Okay.”
She called in to dispatch that they’d be unavailable while Tim drove them to the hospital. Two blocks away he parked near a florist and gestured for her to get out.
“You need flowers. The gift shop prices are highway robbery.”
She gave him a small smile with watery eyes before she rushed inside to make her purchase.
Forty-five minutes later, he was waiting in the lobby when she came down the hospital elevator. Her eyes were red-rimmed and whatever little makeup she had worn to work was smudged in the corners. Her shoulders were slumped and made her look even shorter than usual, more fragile. Fragility was not a word Tim would apply to Lucy. The sole instance he can think of, he can’t remember it without the memory of dirt beneath his boots and the hot desert sun beating on his back.
“Hey. How’d it go?”
“Fine, she’s fine,” Lucy answered brusquely, already headed for the lobby doors and stepping out into the parking lot as he hurried after her. “She gets to go home in a few hours, my dad’s gonna pick her up. They think they removed it all.”
“Lucy… hey, Lucy…” He sped up to follow her to the shop and joined her at the passenger’s side. He bent down slightly to catch sight of her wobbly lip and fresh tear tracks. With a muttered curse, he rested a hand on her shoulder, pulling her into him. “C’mere.”
As fresh tears slid down her cheeks, Lucy shuddered against the fabric of his uniform shirt, breathing in the familiar smell of him and inhaling deeply. She remembered that smell filling her senses when she’d woken up from being buried alive; she remembered it when she stayed in his arms a moment longer than necessary when Jackson died. It was a safe and steady scent, always there, hovering in her periphery and signaling to her nerves that he was around, that there was safety and strength anytime he was nearby.
His strong hands were gentle as they rubbed the hollow between her shoulder blades. She shivered under the Los Angeles sunshine at how enveloped she felt against his big frame, at how she seemed to fit.
The glare of the afternoon sun reflecting off his badge made her squint in confusion as she realized where they are — still in uniform, on the clock, and out in public. Lucy stepped out of his arms to take a shuddering breath, wiping at her eyes as she met his concerned gaze. Her eyes flickered down to his lips before she could stop herself and she flushed in embarrassment.
“Sorry, I’m sorry. I’m good. Really.”
“You want me to take you home?”
“No, no,” she glanced at her watch, “there’s only a few hours. I’m fine. And… I don’t want to be alone,” she admitted. He nodded in understanding. “Got it out of my system. Promise.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, I’m good. Tim… thanks,” she said, stopping him in his tracks before he headed for the driver’s side door. “For bringing me here. I know you hate doing personal errands when working.”
“I don’t hate-” he began, then stopped when he saw her eyes twinkle and a knowing smirk appear on her face. “Okay, maybe I do. But… it’s okay. Some things matter more.”
Lucy stared at him, blinking back tears once more as she remembered the look in his eyes when he’d uttered that line to her once before. It was a complete contrast to where they are now — a public parking lot with the afternoon sun shining down on them. Last time he used those words, they had been sitting in their old shop on an off-the-books midnight mission, putting their lives and jobs on the line to correct an injustice they couldn’t live with.
His voice had been unwavering and steady that night too; his eyes loyal and vowing devotion, like they are now.
“Thanks,” she whispered.
As they pulled out of the hospital parking lot, he turned the radio on to her saved station. The volume was low, she had to strain to hear it, but it was on.
She tossed him a thankful smile that he pretended not to see.
“Lucy! Lucy!”
It happened so fast.
That sounded like such a cliché, was all Lucy could think.
They had secured the home robbery scene in tandem, working seamlessly before Nyla and Thorsen even arrived on scene. After the victim had been rescued, Tim was putting the cuffs on one suspect while Lucy was handling another. With a loud slamming, the back door of the house flew open, catching Lucy off guard for a fraction of a second.
It happened so fast.
Before Lucy could direct an order at the newcomer, he was barreling towards her and tackling her to the ground. She reached for and fired her weapon but the gun fell to the ground when she needed to use all her upper body strength to push him off.
She heard panic in Tim’s voice as he yelled her name, but all she wondered was why her body wasn’t cooperating when it came to shoving this asshole off her. Her mouth had suddenly gone numb and her entire body felt sluggish and disconnected from her control, like it was buffering her directions to fight back. More shots rang out, but her vision was locked on the peeling yellow ceiling of the old house. Her eyes flickered frantically as she tried to sit upright and see what was happening.
But it felt impossible to move.
She looked down to a spot that felt cold on the right side of her abdomen. Her eyes widened frantically when she saw the gush of blood oozing from a wound, saw the handle of a blade sticking out from where it was embedded in her. The flimsy fabric of the bulletproof vest was no match for the force behind the knife.
“Lucy! Hey, look at me! You’re gonna be fine, you hear me?”
Tim clouded her field of vision and she was so grateful for the sight of him. He hovered over her, so close that she could see every line on his face clouded in concern despite the reassuring promises he was uttering.
“I…. it…” She swallowed back her words as though her body wanted her to conserve the energy, but she had to talk to him, she had to talk to Tim, so she pushed on despite the colossal struggle. “It hurts.”
His face went soft as he looked down at her. It was a familiar expression she sometimes noticed at lunch, or dinner, or when they swapped stories about their childhood during a long stakeout. She would tell herself it was just fondness, just affection between two partners, merely friendship.
It didn’t feel like friendship right now.
“I know, Boot, it’s your first time getting stabbed. Hopefully your last,” he muttered, applying pressure to the wound and ignoring her heartbreaking whimpers. He wasn’t causing her pain, he was helping her, he reminded himself as he continued with the first aid. “I can’t take out the knife, you know that. Ambo will be here in four. You’ll be good as new.”
“Not…” Tim bent closer to listen to her and she forced out the words while his ear was close to her. “Not... your Boot.”
“Right.” He swallowed back emotion as he looked at her face, stared into her brown eyes to avoid the sight of his hands soaked with her blood. Even her blood was a bright metallic red, mesmerizing him with its shine like she did. “Of course you’re not. You’re my…” He clenched his jaw, once, twice, before abandoning the sentence. “You’re Lucy. And you’re gonna be fine. Look at me.”
Lucy tried to nod, but she was fading fast. Shivers overtook her body and had her shaking so much that her teeth audibly chattered. The cold and clammy feeling from the wound seemed to be spreading all over. She struggled to stretch her fingers out enough to grab Tim’s forearm, forcing herself to keep her eyes open a little longer.
She simply wanted to keep staring into his eyes.
“Don’t… don’t blame—”
“I don’t. Hey.” Tim’s voice came out forcefully, like he was angry at her for even thinking such a thing right now, right now at this moment when his shaking hands were covered with her still warm blood. "Hey, I don’t blame you. It happens, shit happens.” He blinked furiously and Lucy wondered if she was hallucinating or if those were possibly tears in his eyes. “It can happen to anyone. I don’t blame you, I promise.”
“No,” she whispered, and used all her energy to shake her head a fraction of an inch because this was important, it was so important that he understood this. “Don’t… blame yourself.”
Tim inhaled sharply at her words, losing the fight to control his feelings as he frantically assessed her face. Her usually rosy cheeks had lost their natural color, and her lips were turning an ashen hue. She gasped for air with shallow breaths, her eyes silently pleading with him as if he had the power to cure her.
“Lucy! Hey, hey, stay with me!”
The last thing that came to Lucy’s mind was that she was right — those were tears in Tim’s eyes. She wasn’t hallucinating after all.
Then her world went dark.