Actions

Work Header

Addition Subtraction

Chapter Text

prchamp01 : FutureFlorist - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People prchamp01's Warning Level: 0% 
FutureFlorist: Hey Sunny, you finally got on here! I’ve been looking forward to messaging you.
prchamp01: hello basil
prchamp01: what do you think about my username
FutureFlorist: Oh. I mean, it sounds nice! Is the PR supposed to mean something?
prchamp01: …think about it some more
FutureFlorist: Uh, okay.
FutureFlorist: How is school going for you?
prchamp01: it’s definitely a thing I’m doing now
prchamp01: I’m surviving
FutureFlorist: That’s good to hear. Are you feeling alright though? After being away for so long it must get pretty stressful.
prchamp01: well you see
prchamp01: at the beginning of each school day I try to shut off my brain and become a mindless automaton progressing through the soulless gauntlet of the educational industrial complex
prchamp01: so I don’t really have any strong feelings one way or the other
FutureFlorist: Very poetic, Sunny.
FutureFlorist: But you should try getting to know people in your class! I’m sure there are other students out there who have similar interests as you.
prchamp01: I don’t have interests basil, just knives and depression
prchamp01: my eternal companions in my trip through purgatory
FutureFlorist: You know, that all sounds very grim, but what about those dream pictures you showed me? Surely there must be a few other artists you can meet.
prchamp01: oh you mean my sketchbook
prchamp01: we don’t talk about those, not yet
FutureFlorist: But they were so fun! And colorful…
prchamp01: nope
prchamp01: no discuss
FutureFlorist: Um… okay. But, if you want, I can tell you what I’ve been up to.
prchamp01: sure
FutureFlorist: Well, I’m trying out this cool document scanner Ms. Polly bought for me. I’ve actually scanned a few of those Polaroid pictures of my garden I’ve kept and turned them into digital images on our family computer.
prchamp01: wow basil I didn’t know you were high tech
FutureFlorist: I don’t know about that- I mean, I’m not even really using a digital camera or anything, just turning film into digital images. All these old Polaroid photos aren’t going to be around forever, you know?
FutureFlorist: If, hypothetically speaking, we were to discuss your art, we could totally post some of it online!
prchamp01: huh, that actually would be pretty neat
prchamp01: hypothetically of course
prchamp01: it all sounds like a lot of work though
FutureFlorist: Oh yeah, it’s definitely some work. I got a book at the library that goes over basic HTML- that’s this special coding tool you can make websites with. So I have to start practicing that, as well as get an actual website running, and then upload all my photographs.
FutureFlorist: Also, this whole process of getting things online is really slow sometimes- so I have to install a bunch of programs to make our computer run faster.
FutureFlorist: Did you ever have to deal with anything like that on your computer?
prchamp01: pretty sure I just use what came with the machine
prchamp01: what software are you talking about
FutureFlorist: You know, like, downloading extra memory or setting up an Internet accelerator?
prchamp01: uh
prchamp01: what.
FutureFlorist: Oh yeah, that last one is pretty cool! Also, there’s a special filter I got that converts all your internet signals to a special encrypted signal that avoids interference from the phone lines!
prchamp01: basil you are throwing these words around and I don’t think you know what they mean
FutureFlorist: Technology is incredible!
prchamp01: it’s more that what you’re describing is physically impossible
FutureFlorist: Come on Sunny, don't you know who is creating this software? I'm pretty sure they know what they're doing. They're like, computer geniuses at MIT or something.
prchamp01: …and criminals
prchamp01: seriously though are you filling your parents’ computer with crapware
prchamp01: they’re gonna get mad at you
FutureFlorist: Did you know that wrapping your modem in aluminum foil causes it to transmit signals faster?
prchamp01: don’t believe every online rumor you read about, basil
prchamp01: netizens cannot be trusted
FutureFlorist: Sunny, I think that’s a very depressing and cynical view of humanity. Just because they’re on the World Wide Web doesn’t mean they aren’t good people!
prchamp01: good people
FutureFlorist: Yep!
prchamp01: if you say so, basil
FutureFlorist: Anyways, if I find some new files to help speed up your connection I can pass them on to you as well, if you’d like.
prchamp01: uh, sure…
prchamp01: hold on a sec.


 AOL Instant Messenger
    FutureFlorist's warning level has been increased to 10%.


FutureFlorist : prchamp01 - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People FutureFlorist's Warning Level: 10% 
FutureFlorist: Wait
FutureFlorist: Sunny, what was that?
prchamp01: dunno what you’re talking about buddy
FutureFlorist: But, I saw this warning popup a few seconds ago. Saying something about a number going up?
prchamp01: oh
prchamp01: you mean the warning level
prchamp01: geez, who did you piss off, basil
FutureFlorist: I didn’t do anything!
FutureFlorist: Are you making up a story to scare me?
prchamp01: have I ever been known to mislead you or tell fictional accounts
prchamp01: there’s a reason they call me “sincere sunny”
FutureFlorist: I’ve never heard anyone call you that…
prchamp01: well they should
FutureFlorist: So do you know anything about it? I mean, if not, it’s fine. I’m just, you know, wondering!
prchamp01: well I do know a guy who like, just joined up with the internet police
prchamp01: he’s one of those 1337 hacker types tracking down cyber criminals and shit, pretty sure he dresses up like neo from the matrix
prchamp01: but yeah like, he told me about the warning level, its kind of like your permanent online record. if it gets too high, it raises some flags, some agencies get called, the usual
FutureFlorist: Agencies!?
prchamp01: yeah you might get a phone call
prchamp01:
FutureFlorist: What is that supposed to mean???
prchamp01: that’s known as a smiley, its used to indicate positive emotions
FutureFlorist: I know what a smiley is, who is getting called though?
prchamp01: don’t worry about it
prchamp01: that doesn’t happen until like 50
FutureFlorist: 50%!?


 Warning Received
Warning for FutureFlorist: 10:56:22 AM. You've been warned by an anonymous user. Your warning level has increased from 10% to 20%.


FutureFlorist : prchamp01 - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People FutureFlorist's Warning Level: 20% 
prchamp01: so have you figured out what my screenname means yet
FutureFlorist: It went up again, Sunny!
prchamp01: nope, good try though
prchamp01: try thinking of words that start with p and r
FutureFlorist: Huh?
FutureFlorist: Look, what did you mean by someone getting a phone call?
prchamp01: other than the FBI probably nobody you really need to worry about
FutureFlorist: Wait what? Seriously? How does this even happen???
prchamp01: well I mean you’re not running a crime ring on the side are you
FutureFlorist: Of course not!
prchamp01: well, the only thing I could think of would be
prchamp01: I mean it’s kind of crazy but
FutureFlorist: What?
prchamp01: that flower background you have, behind your messenger portrait, did you make that yourself
FutureFlorist: Umm… I don’t think so!?
prchamp01: oh dear
prchamp01: you downloaded it off a search engine didn’t you
FutureFlorist: Future Florist: I mean, I think so? I don’t even remember setting this up, maybe I did?
prchamp01: that’s a copyrighted image basil, you better look in the options and change it
FutureFlorist: Are you serious? Hold on.
FutureFlorist: I don’t see an option to change it Sunny!
FutureFlorist: What am I supposed to do???
prchamp01: hmm. well, this is tricky
prchamp01: I’d love to help, but- you did use someone’s background image illegally
prchamp01: image piracy is a crime, basil
FutureFlorist: It was an accident!
prchamp01: that’s what they all say
prchamp01: first you’re stealing flower images, next you’re breaking into cars
FutureFlorist: No I’m not!!
prchamp01: next you’re a wanted drug lord being hunted by interpol
FutureFlorist: What? I am really not Sunny!
prchamp01: this is how it starts
FutureFlorist: Seriously what am I supposed to do about this???
prchamp01: the life of a career criminal is a bit out of my element
FutureFlorist: UGH
FutureFlorist: Okay you know what, I’m asking Aubrey for help.


FutureFlorist : WHEREMYGIRLSBAT - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People FutureFlorist's Warning Level: 20% 
FutureFlorist: Aubrey I know you're busy but I’m kinda freaking out right now and I need advice!
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: A swift hook to the jaw can temporarily disable a man up to twice your body weight
FutureFlorist: Not that kind of advice.
FutureFlorist: I might have accidentally used a flower background that didn’t belong to me.
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: So?
FutureFlorist: And now my warning percentile is going up and Sunny just finished telling me that if it goes high enough the FBI will raid my house and arrest me
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: He told you that.
FutureFlorist: Yes, he has a friend that works in the Internet police.
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: LOL
FutureFlorist: This isn’t funny, Aubrey.
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Sure it isn’t
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Seriously though I had no idea people even used that dumb warning message shit
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Who did you piss off that badly Basil
FutureFlorist: I DON’T KNOW THAT’S WHY I’M UPSET


 Warning Received
Warning for FutureFlorist: 11:08:56 AM. You've been warned by WHEREMYGIRLSBAT. Your warning level has increased from 20% to 35%.


FutureFlorist : WHEREMYGIRLSBAT - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People FutureFlorist's Warning Level: 35% 
FutureFlorist: Oh my god Aubrey.
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: LOL IT REALLY WORKED
FutureFlorist: Why, are you trying to get me arrested too?
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: As the leader of the Hooligans it’s my responsibility to punish thieves and vandals Basil
FutureFlorist: You of all people saying this.
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Of course Basil, I’m on the side of law and order now
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Speaking of which I need to message some people
FutureFlorist: Oh no.


 Warning Received
Warning for FutureFlorist: 11:13:02 AM. You've been warned by CandyMan666. Your warning level has increased from 35% to 50%.


 Warning Received
Warning for FutureFlorist: 11:14:33 AM. You've been warned by HellsLittleSister. Your warning level has increased from 50% to 65%.


FutureFlorist : WHEREMYGIRLSBAT - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People FutureFlorist's Warning Level: 65% 
FutureFlorist: PLEASE STOP WHAT THE HELL AUBREY STOOOOPPP
FutureFlorist: I’m seriously going to cry I hope you know that.


 Warning Received
Warning for FutureFlorist: 11:21:18 AM. You've been warned by MAVthe1andonly. Your warning level has increased from 65% to 80%.


WHEREMYGIRLSBAT : prchamp01 - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People WHEREMYGIRLSBAT's Warning Level: 0% 
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: you’re a demon Sunny
prchamp01: I aim to please
prchamp01: oh wait hold on a sec, what do you think my username means
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Uh… puerto rico champ? I dunno you tell me
prchamp01: eh.. close enough
prchamp01: anyways what’s up
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: Basil is freaking out right now I hope you know that
prchamp01: oh about the warning thing
prchamp01: sometimes hardened criminals just need to learn their lesson for the betterment of society
WHEREMYGIRLSBAT: LOL okay but when he’s mad about this afterwards I’m totally saying this was your idea


prchamp01 : FutureFlorist - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People prchamp01's Warning Level: 0% 
prchamp01: if you’d like you can borrow one of my spare eyepatches to help display your new pirate loyalties
FutureFlorist: YOU’RE NOT HELPING SUNNY


 Warning Received
Warning for FutureFlorist: 11:24:23 AM. You've been warned by UndisguisedAngel. Your warning level has increased from 80% to 95%.


FutureFlorist : Herodejaneiro - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People FutureFlorist's Warning Level: 95% 
FutureFlorist: HERO
FutureFlorist: HERO
FutureFlorist: I NEED HELP
FutureFlorist: I THINK I MAY BE IN TROUBLE WITH THE LAW AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Herodejaneiro: Please don’t tell me there was another jumprope incident…
FutureFlorist: NO MY INSTANT MESSENGER WARNING LEVEL KEEPS UP AND I’M GOING TO GET IN BIG TROUBLE
FutureFlorist: …wait, what do you mean “jumprope incident”
Herodejaneiro: I’m just saying…
FutureFlorist: LOOK
FutureFlorist: I JUST GOT THESE WARNING POPUPS ON INSTANT MESSENGER TODAY AND NOW MY PERMANENT RECORD IS GOING UP AND IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF SOME STUPID FLOWER IMAGE I CAN’T CHANGE AND SUNNY TOLD ME ABOUT HOW I’LL GET ARRESTED FOR IT
Herodejaneiro: Hold up. You’re talking about that warning level percentage next to your username? On the upper right?
FutureFlorist: YES
FutureFlorist: AM I GOING TO HAVE TO HIRE A LAWYER
FutureFlorist: WHAT AM I GOING TO DO IF THE FBI BREAKS MY DOOR DOWN
FutureFlorist: I CAN’t SURVIVE IN JAIL HERO WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL MS POLLY
Herodejaneiro: Sunny told you all this?
FutureFlorist: YES
Herodejaneiro:
Herodejaneiro: Basil, I think you may have been, uh, trolled? Is that the modern word for it?
FutureFlorist: what
Herodejaneiro: Yeah, I just checked AIM’s info page. The number doesn’t even do anything other than automatically slow down how quickly you’re able to send new messages for a little while. Nobody else is even able to see it.
FutureFlorist:
Herodejaneiro: Seriously, if you open the help option in your Friend List box it explains all this
Herodejaneiro: Can’t believe every rumor you hear online, you know?
FutureFlorist: .
FutureFlorist: 2G94NR5TP[Q
FutureFlorist: IWHGERU-
FutureFlorist: …okay, I think I need to have a chat with Sunny.
Herodejaneiro: Happy to be of help!


prchamp01 : FutureFlorist - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People prchamp01's Warning Level: 0% 
FutureFlorist: Sunny.
FutureFlorist: … did make this all up just to convince me that I shouldn’t trust anyone online? .
prchamp01: do you really think I’d come up with some crazy scheme to prove a point instead of doing something dumb just cause it seemed funny at the time.
prchamp01: if I did though I admit it sounds pretty genius.
FutureFlorist:
FutureFlorist: This is me expressing frustration at your tricks, Sunny.
prchamp01: actually that’s the sad face not the frowny one.
FutureFlorist: ….
FutureFlorist: I’m going to bed now….
prchamp01: alright see you later Basil.
FutureFlorist is offline and cannot receive your messages.
prchamp01: oof.
FutureFlorist is offline and cannot receive your messages.


prchamp01 : KelDoesntSmell - Instant Message
 File   Edit   Insert   People prchamp01's Warning Level: 0% 
prchamp01: good morning kel
KelDoesntSmell: heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey sunnny
KelDoesntSmell: How you doin?
prchamp01: Its alright
prchamp01: basil is a bit mad at me
KelDoesntSmell: oof
KelDoesntSmell: you want me to hit him up
prchamp01: Nah, it’s alright
prchamp01: tomorrow I’ll fix
KelDoesntSmell: Gotcha
prchamp01: hey I had a question for you
prchamp01: what do you think my username stands for
KelDoesntSmell: ezpz its pet rock champ 2001
prchamp01: the one and only
KelDoesntSmell: Come on sunny nobody is seriously gonna miss a reference like that
prchamp01: right
KelDoesntSmell: hey don’t spend too much time on here you know! I read spending too much time online can give you eye cancer
prchamp01: ah
prchamp01: actually, I got a website related project I gotta work on, I’mma get off for a bit
KelDoesntSmell: probably a good idea tbh, talk to you tomorrow maybe
prchamp01: yep have a good weekend
You have left the chat.