Actions

Work Header

Bitter Feelings

Summary:

For the first time, Hinata feels the need to take back his previous words, he doesn’t want to be there.

Notes:

Or: Hinata realizes something and gets salty over it.
This is my very first fic, so please keep your expectations low (?)
In any case i hope you enjoy!^_^
--

Thank you so much Red (@akai_koutei) for your translation to english!! (´ ∀ ` *)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

 

It made no sense to him.

 

The start of a recovery era initially thought of as impossible had come true, those whose soulless bodies were so far from coming back to life were there. Now alive, now moving, now breathing new air within the hope of a prosperous future away from the hardships of the past.

 

The many work hours had been worth it.

 

A feeling he could only describe as relief took over his chest and his mind as he watched his friends obtain their second chance.

 

All the more, when he saw him.

 

Komaeda seemed to be getting better, and he was proud. His prosthesis isn’t on his arm at the moment but that’s fine, he can use his right hand.

 

“Hinata-kun, isn’t it poor manners to watch people eat?” Komaeda is looking his way but he doesn’t seem upset, there’s a slight blush on his cheeks and what could be an embarrassed expression on his face, unaccustomed to having somebody’s attention on him for that long. Cute.

 

“Yeah, sorry.” Hinata gives his apple a last bite. “Is it so bad? Seeing you gain an appetite is a relief, finish all your food.”

 

“Mhmm, Hinata-kun sure worries,” Komaeda laughs a bit, though after noticing that Hinata hasn’t eaten anything for breakfast beside that apple, his smile doesn’t last much. “Hinata-kun.”

 

“Hm?” Hinata doesn’t meet his eyes immediately, it’s obvious he’d notice.

 

“Hinata-kun, are you only going to eat that? You know, when someone gives advice, they usually follow it too.” Komaeda lets out a disapproving sigh. For someone who’s always taking care of others and making sure they follow the instructions for their physical and mental betterment to a T, Hinata really doesn’t listen to himself.

 

The albino reaches for Hinta’s head and pinches his cheek slightly between his fingers. They’re both aware that there’s a large difference in physique between them, though that doesn’t stop Komaeda from grabbing his sandwich and sticking it towards Hinata.

 

“Komaeda, I’m not… that’s your food…” He can’t finish what he wanted to say. At that moment, he’s faced with those eyes. ‘ Ah… alright, alright, fine. ’ Hinata takes the sandwich and gives it  a small bite. As long as he’s happy...

 

“We truly are alike.” Komaeda isn’t wrong.

 

A sudden sound disturbs the domestic atmosphere and natural calmness of the cafeteria, and it comes from Hinata’s phone, still held in his hand.

 

It’s not just him, all of them have been working their hardest to amend their past actions. Is it really your fault when you’ve been used as a puppet? Actually, yes, to a degree. His Ultimate Lawyer voice seemed to go on a little monologue in his head as he had the thought.

 

All of them have their hands dirty and even though none desired a destiny like this, being able to live on is more than a gift.

 

But it’s not the type of gift someone hands you upon winning a raffle, or a nice new watch on your birthday. It’s the type of gift you give yourself, when no one else will move a finger for you.

 

It was Naegi Makoto himself who led the operation to return them to who they were in the first place, not the animals drowned in despair that that person had forced them to become. Hinata Hajime feels like there’s not a single day where he’s not thankful for being able to be here again, just for those light laughs and newfound freedom, full of unpredictable roads to take.

 

Not all of them have the same duties. Most died within the simulation and their memories are hazy, if not null. With Hinata in charge, Souda, Kuzuryuu, Sonia and Owari work under direct orders from Future Foundation, in a slightly more private and classified manner. Sometimes they leave the island and return to it after a couple of days. Several of them questioned the need for secrets among them. But they didn’t say anything more.

 

“Do you have to go already, Hinata-kun? Ah, I’m no one to ask you for anything, much less to demand it, the truth is that I’m not even worthy of being by your side, you don’t have to take a request from someone like me at all, but…” Hinata observes him with his brow furrowed, disapproving.

 

“Nagito.” And he stops himself.

 

“... take something to eat on the way, please?”

 

Hinata’s expression softens almost instantly.

 

“Yeah, I will.” The tan-skinned man leans forward to give his gray-eyed companion a soft kiss on the temple. “Thanks for reminding me, I won’t take long.”

 

It’s almost instinctive and surprising, how the two of them move in synchrony, as though their souls had loved each other for centuries. Something that natural and simple, but very welcome, a feeling that’s still as magical as the first time it arose. Their lips meet for a moment.



.

 

It makes no sense to him.

 

Nothing begins and ends from one day to the next… unless it’s society as we know it, it seems.

 

The news could’ve been confidential, only meant for their little group as they continued working on the rehabilitation process, but apparently they aren’t, since the pre-recorded message approves conveying them to the rest. That didn’t prevent Hinata from getting pissed off from tip to toe.

 

“What do you think you’re doing, Naegi?” His head won’t stop pounding, he can already feel a migraine coming.

 

When you think of a post-apocalyptic society, when there’s still a whole world sunk in suffering and endless madness, what’s the first thing you think of to start returning it to its roots, its blue skies and clear waters?

 

Rebuilding the school that caused it all certainly isn’t it.

 

Hospitals, food centers, farms, anything one could think of. Hinata thinks that school should be at the bottom of the list of things that should be recovered to ensure the future of humankind, or perhaps off of the list altogether.

 

Or even better! How about not even considering it an option? And, apparently, he’s the only one that takes the news disquietly, since his four colleagues look happy and nostalgic upon hearing that name back in their lives.

 

Maybe they didn’t notice his absence once he’d retired from the room as fast as he could, he still heard their voices through the hallways.

 

For the first time, Hinata feels the need to take back his previous words, he doesn’t want to be there.

 

Why is he here? Why is he not in his cottage, screaming into his pillow?

 

He can feel eyes on him. 

 

Komaeda, beside him, doesn’t seem to be paying much attention to what the others say, their memories and shared laughter in the restaurant as he sits just a little to the back, what appetite he’d mustered up is now absent.

 

They don’t understand, they don’t know anything.

 

Is ignorance something good or bad?

 

I don’t belong here.

 

Those thoughts plagued Hinata’s mind.

 

“Hinata-kun?” A low, soft voice interrupted his incessant thinking, he didn’t turn his head but took a glance at the white-haired man beside him. “You’re making a weird face, Hajime.”

 

‘Abandon who you are, abandon what you like and dislike, leave your dreams behind for the sake of becoming a greater hope. Kibougamine High’s super genius. Since you are no more than a faceless body in a gray crowd. A gray that does nothing but absorb color from those born with a light to bring the greatest wonders to the world we know.’

 

‘From this moment on, Hajime Hinata is dead, no one will know about you or what really happened to you.’

 

“Yeah, sorry… I… don’t feel so good.” Hinata brings his fingertips to his face and massages the space between his eyebrows.

 

Komaeda has a worried look on his face, but there seems to be something else in his eyes as well. The lucky one is very perceptive of the atmosphere around him, an ability earned through a whole lifetime of not allowing himself anything due to the constant weight of colossal misfortune breathing down his neck. Hinata wishes he would’ve come into his life much sooner.

 

Right when he’s about to say something, they’re interrupted by a louder, more energetic voice.

 

“HEY, HAJIME! Why such a long face?” Souda’s voice makes itself present, as he leans with enthusiasm on the table in front of them. “Hey, hey. All this about the academy brings back some awesome memories, dude!”

 

“Really?” Hinata hopes the sarcasm in his voice isn’t too noticeable. 

 

“Mhmm~ Now that you mention it, I think I already have an idea of what to prepare for tonight’s dinner~” Teruteru speaks in a singsong, highly suspicious tone. “Is anybody craving curry?” 

 

Most in the room make disgusted and embarrassed faces, save for Hinata and Komaeda, who fail to understand.

 

“Ewwww. Don’t even mention it! Ever!” Hiyoko yells, pointing an accusing finger at the chef. “I’d rather not eat curry ever again, thanks to you degenerate!”

 

“I only remember some things, but this is the only one I’d like to erase from my memory forever.” Mahiru says with a withering look.

 

“Who’s curry? Give ‘em to me if you don’t want it!” Owari puts her hands behind the back of her head and smiles excitedly.

 

“Ah! Tough crowd! I do like that.” The Ultimate Chef runs his hand through his hairdo, swishing it in a graceful gesture, only to rush back to the kitchen to plan who knows what.

 

“Sorry, what?” Hinata can’t help but ask, his words going faster than his thoughts.

 

“Bro, you have no idea! That shorty makes recipes with weird substances and always gets the lot of us in embarrassing situations!” Souda pulls down hard on his hat, making it cover about half of his face. “Remember that, Komaeda? Tell him!”

 

“Ah… that was…” Komaeda brings his fingers up to his chin, averting his gaze to the floor. He doesn’t seem to remember anything mentioned. “Was I there?”

 

The last part doesn’t only surprise the mechanic, the brown-haired man turns to see him with the same surprise. Komaeda had to have been there, it wouldn’t make sense if he wasn’t. His memories probably hadn’t quite returned, as is the case of some in the group, but it doesn’t cease to be a bit odd.

 

“You were there! You probably just forgot, I’m jealous now.” The mechanic crosses his arms, his voice whimpering. “Some of the most shameful moments of my whole life…”

 

“Oh, but if we leave that aside, they were some wonderful years, don’t you agree?” Sonia stands from her seat with a wide smile, beautiful and motivating. Worthy of a princess. “We had such fun.”

 

“I ate till I bursted in that one festival! Ah, my mouth’s waterin’ just from rememberin’ it…” Owari runs her forearm over her mouth to wipe the bit of drool that was collecting on her lips.

 

“Yeah, and we had to drag you back to the hotel. You should work on that endurance more!” Nekomaru’s strong and booming voice could be heard all the way to the cottages, as he delivers a firm pat on the athlete’s back.

 

“I-It’s a-amazing how the a-academy a-approved trips like that in th-the middle o-of the school y-year…”

 

“Good times.”

 

An unpleasant feeling had begun to form in Hinata’s chest, it was annoying, he clenched his teeth firmly as he listened to the passing memories of his companions floating out into the nostalgic atmosphere.

 

I shouldn’t feel this way. ’ Hinata clenched his fist under the table. ‘ But it’s unfair.

 

The academy wasn’t hope, it was a simple illusion where your dreams would be taken away and you’d be tested as a human in relation to what you could give to their selfish desires. The reserve course students were separate cattle, like spare parts to exploit and use when necessary. Lives that come and go, only those with talent could have a prospering future, while a monochrome uniform was the most you could get.

 

Hinata already knew the main course had privileges, they could come and go between classes as they wished and take an exam once a year. What? The reserve course had at least five tests per day, you didn’t just have to pay an excessive amount of money to put one foot into the school as a student, you’d also live with the sickening, venomous environment of everyone around you. The reserve students want to be in the main course, the world hates the reserve students, and the reserve students hate themselves.

 

“Why don’t we organize a picnic, like we did that day on our excursion?” The ex-princess suggests in a merry voice, eyes shining with enthusiasm. “We can play volleyball as well, like that time.”

 

“Ohhh! Ibuki digs that idea! Classics from the past, ready to be served!”

 

“Excellent idea, miss Sonia!!” Souda shudders with excitement. “We’ve been needing a beach party, don’t you think, Hinata?”

 

“Hinata?”

 

Ah.

 

There’s a notorious crack right on the table, caused by the brown-haired man’s hand. Hinata immediately realizes the amount of eyes on him, he’s already used to having people around him looking at him in such a way, and releases his iron grip on the fork currently stuck on the wooden table.

 

Human emotions are senseless, you live a moment feeling one thing and the next you feel another. Everything is predictable, you can live through things without realizing their weight and only notice it when it’s too late.

 

“Do whatever you want.” Hinata gets up, with a monotone voice that leaves a resounding silence in the room, eyes follow him all the way from the table he was at to the exit, and for a moment the only sound is that of his firm steps on the marble floor.

 

“H-H-Hinata-san, wh-what’s w-wrong? ...a-aren’t you coming?” Surprisingly, Tsumiki’s fearful voice is the first to be heard.

 

“No.” Hinata doesn’t interrupt his trajectory for a single second. “The reserve course student has things to do.” The words leave his mouth before he can even contemplate them.

 

When they said that in order to be the Ultimate Analyst you had to bury all that made you a sentimental being, they truly weren’t wrong.

 

You sound like a child right now, Hajime, ’ he thought to himself. But he doesn’t care, if he stays a minute longer it could be worse.

 

And this really surprised everyone, within his mind Hinata remembered the way his old classmates were. Hostility and sarcasm were on daily order, even coming from their teachers, he supposes that’s how he learned some things worthy of a reserve courser.

 

“Hinata-kun?” The last voice he manages to hear is Komaeda’s calling out his name with apprehension, the talented stops at the exit for a moment. There’s no time when Hinata doesn’t respond to the albino’s voice, but now… now he only wants to be alone.

 

He continues making his way down the hotel stairs, leaving a scene behind at the restaurant.

 

Conflicting feelings begin to stir in his stomach, when before he couldn’t feel anything, now there’s only guilt and frustration. Locked up in his cottage, looking out the window at the sky he remembers as blue and fresh before, now less saturated despite being midday.

 

‘Your dreams, your ego, your individuality, bury them all and become the ideal the world seeks.’

 

Hinata thinks about his life, his parents weren’t the best, but gave him everything so their son could be in the best school in Japan, or in the world. Was it always his dream to go to the academy? Or was it always desperation and need to prove them they weren’t wrong about him?

 

What happened to them? ’ Hinata suddenly thinks and his expression hardens for a moment, he already knows the answer. ‘ Would they have thought about me? ’ He brings his hand to his face and covers his mouth, sinking in a dark cloud. ‘ What did the school say about my disappearance?

 

Did no one look for me?

 

Locked up in the lowest point of the school lied a boy ignorant about his superiors’ intentions, needles and substances put into his body and mind, talents and false hope washing over his emotions.

 

‘Haven’t you heard? Another student disappeared today.’ The nameless voices whispered to each other inside a gray classroom. ‘No one cares, because the school only cares about the main course… only us at the bottom know about it, the school is denying any rumor that doesn’t support its image and keeps it all classified. Nobody cares about our lives.’

 

Class 77-B’s trips match the timeframe in which he was stuck down at the lab, it can’t be a coincidence, can it?

 

A repeating but light knock at his door pulls him out of his thoughts for an instant.

 

Hinata doesn’t feel in the mood to open the door, much less to talk to anyone at the moment, but a part of him wishes to share his anguish with someone and tell them the truth of what happened. ‘ Is it bad to burst their happy bubble in this broken world just because of your feelings, Hajime?

 

He’s already at the door, turning the knob to discover who is interrupting his thoughts at such an hour.

 

Komaeda is in front of him and they look at each other in silence, he feels partially relieved that it’s him there, always the lucky one staying with him when the world won’t stop spinning and crumbling, Hinata notes, but it doesn’t appease him much.

 

“I thought you’d be here, Hinata-kun.” Komaeda is the first to speak, he sports a smile that could be described as relieved, but not entirely.

 

Hinata doesn’t respond and simply moves aside, opening the door to welcome the lucky student into his room, thankfully nothing had been broken before he arrived. There’s silence between them and, for some minutes, Hinata considers his next words seriously.

 

It’s Komaeda after all, the greatest admirer of Kibougamine Academy.

 

“Ah, your arm’s fixed already,” is the first thing the tan-skinned man says, as he opens a box on his desk to reveal a beautiful piece of metal shaped like a human arm, made by himself, for the lucky student.

 

Komaeda doesn’t respond to this and his smile vanishes, like an autumn leaf blown far away by a slight breeze.

 

“Hinata-kun.”

 

Hinata knows he’s being unfair to the others, it’s a type of curse. He’s far too sentimental and that’s the issue that doomed him years ago.

 

But the world was unfair to him first.

 

“Hinata-kun.” Komaeda is in front of him, his interest in the mechanical arm being offered to him is nonexistent, that isn’t the reason he’s here. But Hinata already knows that.

 

“The problem with the joints has been fixed and I doubt it’ll give you any trouble for a while, but you should take some care when leaning on it.” The tan-skinned man doesn’t look him in the eyes and begins to move the mechanical fingers of the piece in his hands, his own creation. “It’s incredible what talent can achieve, don’t you think, Komaeda?” Hinata smiles, but feels no happiness, a funereal darkness in his heterochromatic eyes.

 

The negative feelings flood his mind and body and make him feel terrible, indecisive.

 

Feeling things is what reminds me that he still has a human heart.

 

“... oh! I understand.” Komaeda holds the sleeve that hangs where there had been an arm before. “Someone like me shouldn’t expect to have Hinata-kun’s forgiveness, it would be foolish to believe that, right?” The albino shows an empty smile, hoping the tan-skinned man can’t notice his lips trembling in the most subtle way. “You should’ve told me that you hated me before, Hinata-kun.”

 

What?

 

“Hate… I-I never said I hated you!” Hinata’s act drops immediately and he leaves the metallic object aside in order to hold Komaeda’s hand, which is cold. “Not you.”

 

They’ve had this conversation before, on an afternoon at the ship’s deck, headed to avoid a second wave of despair over the world.

 

There’s many things left to talk about, many things still buried under the rubble of current and urgent issues that need to be tended to. Hinata thought it wasn’t necessary for people to know what really happened to him, because there were more important things to address: everyone’s health and the future he wants to begin building.

 

But the past always comes back, no matter how, or what appearance it takes.

 

Hajime Hinata is a broken diamond.

 

His fingers tremble around the lucky one’s hand, he doesn’t know where to start, doesn’t know what to say. The words he formed in his head moments before are now nothing but senseless scribbles on a once-blank page.

 

Hinata doesn’t know how he feels, he can perceive the way the emotions in his chest choke him and name them: anger, frustration, courage, sadness, guilt. But when they all combine and stir within him, it’s all so confusing it blinds him.

 

He can feel soft fabric brushing his cheek. He never realized that tears are already flowing from his bicolored eyes, and a throbbing headache keeps increasing.

 

He wants to let it all out, but how?

 

“I knew it.” Komeda’s voice is so soft it harms and heals him at the same time. “Hinata-kun, you said that in order to begin a new future, the past must be let go.” Komeda’s tact is so soft he feels the lump in his throat begin to slowly disappear. “Normally, when someone gives advice, they usually follow it too.” There’s that smile again, ah...

 

Komaeda loves Kibougamine, but at the same time… if there’s anyone that can understand Hinata, it’s him.

 

“Komaeda, Kibougamine Academy isn’t what you think it is.” Hinata decides it’s been enough. “I don’t approve of Naegi wanting to rebuild that hell, much less to return it to its former glory.”

 

Hinata stops the movement of Komaeda’s arms with both hands, holding them without force. He decides to tell him everything despite the possible reactions that may come afterward.

 

“That’s not hope, Komaeda.” Hinata expects the worst. “It never was! Using other people’s lives for the sake of those born with talent isn’t what humankind needs! People have lives, they have dreams! Just because they’re not born with a quality doesn’t mean they should give their everything and suffer for someone else’s sake!” Hinata knows he’s not making much sense, but he can’t stop himself.

 

“I know.” Two simple words from the albino impact Hinata’s thoughts enough to leave him frozen in front of him, out of everything he expected from him, this isn’t it.

 

“W-What?” Hinata takes a step back.

 

Were you desperate enough to become hope that you gave it all away to Kibougamine Academy?

 

Komaeda’s voice from within the simulation echoes in his mind, at that moment Hinata thought nothing the lucky student said made sense, but now...

 

“The file, Hinata-kun,” Komaeda says, the only change in his expression being a slightly strained tint.

 

The gray-eyed man leads the brown-haired one to the bed, motioning for him to sit while he stays on his feet in front of him and holds his cheek in his hand, caressing his cheekbone.

 

“‘Hinata Hajime, who possesses many blank spaces in regards to his qualities and aptitudes, has been chosen to become Kibougamine’s definitive hope’... Hinata-kun, Enoshima can’t take all the credit for the end of the world.” Komaeda’s look becomes serious, but the gentleness of his hand doesn’t change. “In a world without a system like the one the academy had, she wouldn’t have obtained it all on a silver platter. You know that too.”

 

Hinata grits his teeth at the mention of that name, he’d love it if Komaeda’s lips never had to repeat it again.

 

“But I think there’s something else you haven’t said.” The albino’s words once again don’t fail to bring down his train of thought, bringing him back to a reality where his secrets are easily seen by a pair of gray eyes and a very sharp mind, Hinata feels like an open book when it comes to Komaeda.

 

How would he feel if I told him that while he and his class were having fun, I was getting my head opened and had them play lab on me?

 

Komaeda waits patiently as Hinata thinks about what to say, they really have matured.

 

“You don’t have to say it if you don’t want to, Hinata-kun, but I can see it bothers you a lot… no one can have fun if you’re suffering.”

 

“You were going to festivals and school trips during your time in the Academy, right?” Hinata asks, his attention on the hand Komaeda uses to hold his cheek.

 

“Yes? Though I wasn’t there on most of them, as far as I recall.” Komaeda wasn’t there? Huh.

 

“... I was selected for the project since my first year,” Hinata starts, thinking his words over while he lets out, little by little, the fragments of a secret buried in his throat for too long. “I never finished my studies.” Hinata’s hands touch the fabric of Komaeda’s jacket. “I was told they’d give me a talent… I… I knew it wouldn’t be quick and easy, but I didn’t imagine going through…”

 

From his point of view, Komaeda can see the scar on Hinata’s forehead, it’s dry and clean but it hides memories, none good.

 

“... what did they do to you?” The albino’s voice is so soft and low that the tan-skinned man can’t help but give into it, Hinata’s arms surround Komaeda’s waist and he hides his eyes against his white shirt, trembling. The lucky one gently pets his hair, his other arm surrounds his head in an attempt to hold him.

 

The clean aroma, the vanilla essence and smell of soap on Komaeda’s clothes is enough to cloud his headache bit by bit, he begins to speak freely.

 

“While the psyche has its complicated procedures, for the physical abilities, they tried faster methods for muscle improvement… do you know why there’s people from other continents in your class, like Sonia, but Naegi’s class just had people from Japan?”

 

“... did they reduce their budget for the recruitment of Ultimates?” Komeda begins to see where this is going, he doesn’t like it.

 

Hinata nods, and says:

 

“They wanted all the resources needed to ensure the experiment wouldn’t fail, they used all of it. How can someone who doesn’t know how to perform a basic boxing tackle suddenly have the strength to take down ten horses without a scratch?” The brown-haired man can remember the feeling of the needles injecting substances into his arms and abdomen. Komaeda’s embrace becomes firmer, holding him against his body.

 

There’s a silence between them for a moment, until it’s interrupted by the albino.

 

“Haha…” Komaeda hangs his head, there’s no trace of humor or mockery in his voice. “Really...”

 

Hinata can’t see his expression, but Komaeda is full of disappointment and rage. Hope for humankind? He really is the worst… he remembers himself, ignorant and thinking that everything that academy did was for the greater good. What foul luck, how despairing… to see the being he loves most in the world, suffering because of a false hope.

 

Hope is pure and devours even the most disgusting despair, it’s not as simple as creating a black and white painting and calling it hope. It slips out of your control as soon as other people perceive it, to some it can be something beautiful, and to others an atrocity.

 

“Do you hate me, Komaeda?” Hinata’s weak voice resounds again, it’s less upset than before, but still nervous.

 

“Hinata-kun, please listen to what I’m going to say.” Anxiety grows like a burning flame in Hinata’s heart, but he listens.

 

There’s a silence, Hinata swears he can hear Komaeda’s heart beating from how hard it echoes against him.

 

“Now I understand why I fell for you time and time again.”

 

This time, Hinata lifts his head to meet Komaeda’s eyes, his weeping eyes slightly reddened.

 

“Hinata-kun is, without a doubt, absolute hope… not because someone else made you so, but because despite all adversity, you managed to continue rising.” Komaeda tries to wipe the tears away from those beautiful bicolored eyes, although he himself is on the verge of crying as well. “My past self would be confused, probably angry… Hinata Hajime is the complete opposite to what I took for absolute truth, all of my beliefs… you destroyed them all and gave me a new reality.”

 

That certainty in Komaeda’s words, the way he spoke as if he really believes Hinata is the brightest star on a dark night, that adoration directed only at him… Hinata begins to believe what he’s saying is true.

 

With that look, that security, that voice… Komaeda could tell him the sea is orange and Hinata would believe it in an instant. He likes it.

 

“Time and time again… a simple-looking boy unconscious on the sand, by the waves… a gentleman with long black hair and a large amount of secrets… a ray of sunlight extending his hand to help me out of a cold capsule, to a world where the sky is blue again… it hurt a lot, Hinata-kun...” Komaeda smiles, he seems tired and extremely relieved to hold the tan-skinned man in his arms. “I love you so much it hurts sometimes.”

 

“It doesn’t have to hurt.” Hinata moves his hands carefully over the albino’s back, in a comforting and affectionate gesture. “I mean, you have me right here.”

 

“Yes… I have you here.” Komaeda seems content with his words, his hand resumes his soft caresses on the other’s hair. Hinata pulls Komaeda down so that he sits on his lap, without having to break the embrace he’s got him in.

 

It’s wonderful how easy it is, Hinata doesn’t remember what it’s like to not have another body next to his that he can hold and find comfort in when the world is being so horrible.

 

“I… eh… I’m sorry about before, I got carried away.” Hinata shows his regret, he wasn’t in the right.

 

“I think a talk with the others will be in order, before the party.”

 

“No, you know what I mean.” Hinata frowns, though inoffensively.

 

They share visual contact for a few moments, a silent and comfortable conversation. They have all the time in the world to understand each other.

 

“Thanks for being here, Komaeda… I...” Hinata seems a little embarrassed this time, with a beautiful blush on his cheeks. “I love you too, you know? T-Try not to forget it!”

 

Komaeda feels as though he could melt in those firm arms, which hold him like he’s the most valuable thing in the world.

 

“Did you know, Hinata-kun? When someone gives advice, they usually follow it too.” Komaeda rests his cheek on the tan-skinned man’s hair, a silly and lovesick smile on his face, as Hinata’s melodious laughter makes itself heard.

 

“Yeah, I’ve got to work on that.”

Notes:

I wanted to write something focused on Hajime, or at least a part of him that is starting to realize how much the world took away of his life T__T
still, he has his boyfriend to help him in the same way he did to him.