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Let's try this again.

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Year 1


Hogwarts Express 1971

Hermione awoke with a pounding head letting out a groan as she sits up in her bed rubbing at her eyes, looking around her room she tries to wrap her hand around the confusion she feels. Suddenly everything slips into place as she looks down at herself seeing the ripped clothes that were far too big for her. 


“Oh Harry,” she says, unable to stop the sobs from coming from her as she falls back pulling the blanket over her head. Just then the door is thrown open and a body comes flying towards her bed.


“Hermione get up” an unfamiliar voice screams, shaking her as memories fill her head, the voice suddenly becoming familiar as life flashed before her eyes. A life of safety and magic, a combination that Hermione Granger never experienced. 


“James go away” she growls as she has no intention of getting out of this bed. Ever. 


“What? No get up Hermione it’s September 1st” He tells her, she nods remembering the celebratory dinner the night before a nervous feeling filling her stomach at the thought of leaving her parents. 


“Alright James let me get dressed. I will be down soon” she tells him, needing a few moments alone. He finally agrees, running out of the room slamming the door behind him. Hermione remains still wanting to make sure it was safe to remove the covers not wanting to explain these clothes to anyone so soon. Climbing from the bed she looks around the room to find piles of books everywhere. At least that’s the same. The room reminds her of a much larger version of the Gryffindor common room. Making her way to the ensuite she finds the outfit she laid out the night before sitting ready.


“Oh Merlin this is confusing,” she tells herself sitting on the ground leaning on the closed door. Memories of both her lives swirling around her head making her feel like she might throw up. Eventually, she pulls herself up stumbling forward and ends up at the sink splashing water at her face. She jumps back when she makes eye contact with herself in the mirror as she sees a face she has seen every day for the last eleven years but also a face she has never seen before. “ I look like Harry,” she tells herself pulling her hand through messy black hair. “Okay Hermione pull it together Harry is counting on you. A lot of people are counting on you” she tells herself, working to calm down. “One step at a time. Get to Hogwarts and then you can make a plan” Damn Malfoy just had to go and get himself killed and mess up their plan. She wasn't supposed to be here alone. 


As she leaves the bathroom dressed and ready to go downstairs she stuffs the clothes into her bag, which thankfully made the trip with her. Leaving the room she wrestles with her conflicting memory to find the dining room. Thankfully she can hear James’s shouts and follows the sound of her twin's voice where he is in the middle of questioning Father about the sorting hat ceremony. Again. As she enters the room she is pulled into a hug from her crying mother.


“Oh look at you” Euphemia sobs “I can’t believe you are leaving me” Hermione ignores James groaning behind her allowing the hug and soaking up the comfort it gives her. 


“I’m going to miss you too, Mum,” she tells her a few tears slipping past her defences. Stupid de-ageing. 

The Potters spend a nice breakfast together with the twins struggling between their nerves and excitement. 

“I can’t wait to see the gryffindor common room,” James says between bites of toast. 


“You don’t know if you will even get into gryffindor. You could end up in Hufflepuff” Hermione teases, enjoying the look of disgust James sends her. “Maybe i’ll end up in Slytherin I think I would look good in green” 


“What? No! We can’t be in different houses” James shouts in fright “And you definitely can’t be a snake” 


“And what is wrong with being a snake James Potter?” Euphemia asks her son.


“Nothing, it's a great house,” James tells the former Slytherin cowering under her glare. His father was too busy laughing to provide any defence for his son.


Sooner than any Potter would like the four were making their way through Kings Cross James having demanded they don’t just apparate straight to the platform. 


“Come on Hermione, hurry up?” James says pulling at her but as she resists he gives up running ahead with his parents chasing after him. Hermione tries to catch up but is knocked to the ground by a girl around her age with blonde hair. 


“Sorry, I wasn't watching where I was going?” Hermione tells her stopping to help her pick up the book she dropped. Looking down at a slightly older copy of Hogwarts a History than she was used too she hands it back. “You might want to hide that one before a muggle sees it,” she tells her, amused by how fast the girl's head snaps up to meet her eyes. 


“You're a witch?” Marlene says looking at her in shock, her accent and the words giving her a flashback to the first time Hermione Granger was told she was a witch by McGonagall. 

“Last I checked,” Hermione tells her “Your first year?” 


“Marlene Mckinnon” she nods, holding out her hand. 


“Hermione Potter, it’s my first year too” reaching out to shake the slightly trembling hand. 


“There you are. We asked if there is not such a thing as platform 9 ¾” a man and women come up to them pushing a cart with a trunk and owl cage. A little girl balanced on the end. “Are you sure it was this station?” the women asked, presumably Mrs. Mckinnon. 


“Do you need some help?” Hermione butts in checking the time seeing that it was ten to eleven. “We better be quick if we want to make the train” 


“Oh Hello,” Mr. Mckinnon says looking at her questioningly.


“Mum, Dad this is Hermione, it’s her first year too” Marlene fills them in, as Hermione leads them over to the entrance. Looking around to make sure no muggles are watching. 


“Alright you see that wall,” Hermione tells them pointing between Platforms 9 and 10. “Run into it” 


“Excuse me,” Mrs. Mckinnon asks. Hermione just grins as she gives them a wave running through the barrier trusting them to catch up. She runs straight into her frantic Mother.


“There you are, you can’t just wander off,” Euphemia tells her. 


“Sorry Mum, I ran into a muggle-born that needed help finding the platform”


“Alright,” Euphemia says “Come on James and Dad should have gotten the trunks loaded by now,” she says leading them over to a jumping James who didn't seem to know what to look at first. 


“You two better go find a seat,” Her Dad says as he moves from James who is being attacked by his mother much to his horror. “You make sure your brother behaves now” he whispers to her as he pulls her into a hug.


“I’ll try my best,” She says, fighting not to cry. After a few more minutes of goodbyes, the Potter twins board the train finding an empty compartment. As Hermione gets another wave of memories of her, Ron and Harry sat in this very compartment. She closed her eyes repeating her mantra. Wait till tonight to cry. Wait till tonight.


“Do you really think we could be in different houses?” James whispers, pulling her from her thoughts. 


“I don’t know,” She tells him. “Does it matter you're not going to stop being my brother just because you are wearing a different colour tie” Just as he was about to say something the compartment door slid open.


“Do you mind if I sit here?” A boy asks, Hermione holding back a gasp at the sight of a young Sirius alive and in front of her. 


“Go ahead,” James tells him with a grin, “James Potter, this is my twin Hermione” Hermione just waves shocked into silence just awkwardly staring at him. Before he can answer the door slides open and a redhead slides in for a second. Hermione confuses her with Ginny before she looks into the eyes of her best friend and little brother. Only she seems to have been crying. 


“Are you alright?” She hears James ask as he moves, giving her room to sit down. Lily gives him a shaky smile as introductions start again; she remains silent, lost in her memories until the door slides open once more. She can’t hide her reaction this time as Severus Snape enters his hair still looking like it could use a good wash. 


“There you are,” He says spotting Lily, noticing her crying he turns to glare at the other occupants of the cabin “have these three been bothering you” Huh, so he has always sounded like he hates everyone for existing.


“I’m fine Sev,” Lily says patting the seat next to her he just glares as the seat has personally offended him. 

“I’ll see you at the sorting. You'd better be in Slytherin” he tells her, turning to leave. Like that would end well with a muggle-born in the snake pit. Hermione thinks with an eye roll. Just as James lets out a loud sarcastic laugh. 


“I’d rather leave the school than be in Slytherin,” he tells them.


“My whole family is in slytherin,” Sirius tells him with a look of contemplation on his face “Maybe I'll break the tradition,” He says leaning over to high five James. 


“If you’d rather be brawny than brainy” Snape tells them.


“Where are you hoping to go seeing as you're neither?” Sirius asked, face full of innocence as James snickers. 


“Let’s go Sev,” Lily says, getting up to pull him from through the door as his face turns red reaching for his wand. 


“See you later Snivellus” James shouts after them. Hermione knows she should have stopped them but her headache was back in full force. Wait till tonight. She tells herself deciding to sleep until they get to Hogwarts it was going to be a long night.


The Sorting

Hermione feels conflicted as the first years make their way over on the boats. Part of her is relieved to be home, another part of her is going over every bad memory, and the other is filled with excitement. Wait till tonight. As they gather around the door waiting for McGonagall. Hermoine feels a tap on her shoulder and looking over she finds Marlene standing next to her eyes jumping between her and taking in her new environment. 

“I just wanted to thank you for your help,” Marlene tells her. “Back on the platform”, she adds like she is worried Hermione had forgotten their meeting.


“It’s not a problem it’s a little difficult to find unless you go running at walls all the time,” Hermione tells her, amused by the nervous fidgeting the girl next to her is doing. 


“Well I only ran into walls at airports, I’ll have to reconsider now, maybe expand my approach,” Marlene tells her with a grin. Hermione lets out a laugh shaking her head


“Nervous?” She asks as she watches her jump from foot to foot. 


“No, it's just she never said that the test will be on. I didn’t study for the first day” Marlene tells her.


“Don’t worry, the test doesn't require much studying. You just have to know how to defeat a Troll” Hermione tells her enjoying her insider knowledge of Hogwarts the last time she did this she was just as worried thinking that if she failed she would have to leave. She watches Marlene pale in front of her and instantly feels bad. “Oh Merlin, no I’m sorry it's nothing dangerous” Marlene glares at her, just as the door opens and Mcgonagall comes out, Marlene mutters about how she will get her back for that as they are led to the front of the hall. Everyone looked around them in amazement. 


“Alright when I call your name, come to the front and you will be sorted into your houses' ' McGonagall tells them, Hermione's attention fading in and out as she looks around the room at familiar faces promising herself to keep them alive. Most of them she thinks as she looks to the Slytherin table.


“Sirius Black”


“Gryffindor” the hat yells, gasps filling the room, Sirius looking torn between excitement and fear as he runs to the Gryffindor table.


“Lily Evans”




“Remus Lupin”




“Marlene Mckinnon”  




“Dorcas Meadowes”




“Peter Pettigrew” That name draws Hermione’s attention hand twitching with the desire to reach for her wand as she watches a much more human-looking boy makes his way to the front of the room twitching now and again as he looks out to all the faces he shrinks into the seat. The hat debated for several minutes before yelling out.  


“Gryffindor” Wait till tonight.


“Hermione Potter” Hermione makes her way to the front, half amused at the terror in the hat's voice as he addresses her


“Great Merlin, how do we stop that from happening?” He asks, Hermione has to force herself not to respond externally. I have no idea. She answers truthfully. “What house do you want in?” She debates it for several minutes, Slytherin would allow better access to the Death Eaters, Hufflepuff would allow her to fly under the radar, Ravenclaw would allow for more privacy to train and research. In the end, there was only one choice. Let me go home, please.


“Gryffindor” the hat yells and she makes her way to the safety of the Gryffindor table. 


“James Potter” Mcgonnagall shouts out, James walks up to the hat more calmly than he had been all morning.


“Gryffindor” James faces brakes out in a grin as he rushes to his sister’s side


“And you were worried,” she teases him.


“Severus Snape”




After a delicious welcoming feast and a less terrifying opening announcement than she remembers her first year being, they are shown to the common room. Hermione can’t help beaming as she runs her hand along the back of the familiar couch. She knew she made the right choice in Gryffindor, if she was going to change the future she would need these small comforts. James gives her a quick hug as he follows the boys up to the dorm. I wonder how long it takes for the Marauders to form, Hermione thinks to herself. After waiting two hours for her roommates to fall asleep, Hermione pulls out her bag from its hiding place under her pillow digging out the invisibility cloak and maps her way towards the room of requirements. Once the door closes she doesn't even notice the form that the room takes as she sinks to her knees the tears that had been building all day finally fall.

After a night of crying and no plans being made, Hermione makes her way to the great hall relieved that classes would be starting until the following Monday. She sits at the Gryffindor table numbly sipping on a coffee when she sees the first-year Gryffindors wander into the common room. James looks for her and sends her a grin as he notices her at the table. 


“Couldn't wait for the rest of us” James asks as he drops into the table next to her, throwing an arm around her shoulder as he grabs a slice of toast from her plate shoving it into his mouth. Hermione just lets out a grunt in no mood to talk, the others send her a smile but seem to know she is not in the mood for conversation. She watches them all interact, the conversation stilted and slightly awkward nowhere near the easy-going nature they will share eventually. She quickly excuses herself rushing back to the room of requirements. 


Hours later she is sitting in an exhausted heap in the middle of the room, a mess of destroyed training dummies, notes, books and plans. She was going to protect these people and give them a life without being child soldiers even if it killed her.


September 1971


Hermione sat at the front of her ‘first’ Transfiguration class next to Dorcus who was trying to get the tabby cat at the front of the class's attention. Hermione barely held in her smirk grabbing Dorcus's arm as she was about to get up to move closer.


“I wouldn't do that if I were you,” Hermine tells her, Dorcus turns to question her but Sirius and James come bursting through the door scrambling to get to their seats.


“Told you we wouldn't be late” James announces loudly to Sirius from the set of desks next to her.


“Class started five minutes ago,” Hermione tells them as she prepares her quill, a sad smile on her lips and just how much the two reminded her of Ron and Harry. 


“Well I don’t see Professor McGonagall here,” Sirius tells her, being very mature and striking out his tongue at her over James’s head. She didn’t respond sitting back to watch McGonagall be her over-dramatic self, jumping from the desk and standing in front of James and Sirius.


“Brilliant,” James says when she gets over his shock just as McGonagall begins lecturing them on timeliness.


“Thank you for stopping me from petting our professor” Dorcus whispers to her eyes wide.


Hermione spends the first week adjusting to her classes and finding a balance between the right amount of right and wrong answers to not draw unwanted attention to herself. She also watches lifelong friendships form in front of her eyes, not that she makes any move to participate. She was here to fix the future, not make friends. Her only goal was to make sure that these friendships lasted past their twenties. 


James watches his sister for the first month of school, unsure what he could do to help her. She barely ate and her eyes were black with tiredness. Every time he tried to talk to her she told him she was just homesick and that she would be fine. He thought about telling his parents but he didn't want to worry them or worse make them take Hermione home. He watches as she sat across from him reading, while their fellow first years were all engaged in conversation with each other. He had seen them try to talk to her, she was never rude to them but they could tell she wasn't interested in talking and the attempts were lessening as time went on. He watched as Evans excused herself to go to the bathroom and silently followed after her. He waited till they were out of the great hall before he attempted to get her attention. 


“Evans”' she spun around to face him, she almost looked scared for a second before she recognized him but he shook it off. “Could I talk to you for a second?” She nods hesitantly following him to the side of the hall out of people's way. “I um... I just wanted to ask if you had noticed anything wrong with my sister” He asks 


“I don’t think so, I can’t say I know her that well she is very quiet” 


“That’s the problem, Mia isn't shy she is loud and opinionated but since we got here she's barely said more than two words to me and she looks so tired” 


“It’s probably the nightmares,” Lily tells him, feeling bad for the boy in front of her who seems on the verge of panic. 


“Nightmares?” he asks, Hermione doesn't have nightmares, she is the one who comforts him after nightmares. 


“Yes, they seem to be getting worse. They happen almost every night now” She tells him, frowning at the confused look on his face “She's probably just home sick” she tells him wanting to reassure him. 

“Right yes, home sick” he nods that makes sense that's what she has been telling him. “Thank you Evans,” he says as he turns back towards the hall, smashing right into Severus as he comes out the door. “Watch where you're going Snivellus” he snaps. Marching back into the hall before Severus can even respond. 


“What were you doing with him?” Severus scowls as he approaches her. 


“Nothing,” Lily tells him “He had some questions about the homework” 


October 1971


Marlene jumps awake as a scream goes through the room before it is quickly silenced. She looks over and Lily and Dorcas are still sound asleep having grown accustomed to the noise. She thinks about going back to sleep but as she hears quiet sniffles her decision was made as she quickly crosses the room. A box of tissues in one hand and a potion in the other. As she approaches the head of the bed she finds herself at the end of a wand. 


“Sorry,” Hermione tells her, dropping her wand to the bed as she sits up wiping her face “Did I wake you?” She questions being unable to remember if she put up a silencing spell when she came back from the room or requirements. 


“Um yes but it's fine,” Marlene tells her, holding out the tissues, and sitting on the edge of the bed forcing Hermione to move over looking at her confused. “I went to Madame Pomfrey and told her I was having nightmares. She gave me this” Marlene says forcing the potion into her hands now worried that she overstepped but she was worried about her roommate, she seemed like a shell of a person compared to the girl she met on the platform. 


“Dreamless sleep,” she says inspecting the bottle. “It’s perfectly safe to take every once in a while,” Hemione tells her, confused about this entire interaction. She tries to give it back but it is pushed towards her.


“It’s for you,” Marlene tells her “You need to get some sleep, I didn't think you would go to her for help” Hermione looks at her in shock, just how often was she forgetting to put up silencing charms. A part of her wants to argue but a much larger part of her can’t remember the last time she got any real sleep. 


“Thank you,” she tells her, uncapping the lid and taking a sip under Marlene's watch full eye. 

The next morning when the girls wake up they are shocked to find Hermione still asleep, they get ready in silence making sure to stop by McGonnagal’s office to inform her that Hermione is sick. 


It’s Halloween when Hermione finally snaps, James had been attached to her hip the past month and she could barely find the time to get to the room of requirements to get some work done. She was also so tired between the extra training she was putting her younger self through and the nightmares she barely slept. The potion Marlene got for her helped but she was careful not to become too dependent on it. 


“Come on Hermione, you can study later. This is our first Hogwarts party,” James said, jumping around at the table next to her. She tried to ignore him until his pumpkin juice spilled all over the book she was reading. 


“James” she shouts “I don’t want to go to the party, I just want five minutes peace away from you,” she tells him ignoring the way he flinches back from her, she pulls out her wand drying out her book before marching out the hall. Once she got to the room of requirements she dropped to her knees her bag and book tumbling to the floor things falling out everywhere. She curls up, unable to stop the tears she was messing everything up. She sits with her eyes closed until a bug hits her face; she reluctantly moves a hand to flick it away only for it to come back a moment later. Her eyes snap open only to find it's not a bug but a snitch. Grabbing it she finds the familiar words inscribed across it, an idea forming in her head as she brings it to her lips her connection with Harry, allowing the snitch to open finding just what she was looking for inside. Shaking the stone out into her hand she wraps both hands around it, closing her eyes she remains still until she hears a familiar voice. 


“Huh I didn't expect you to look so much like me” A familiar voice fills the room. 


“Hi Harry” she whispers.