Elenora lasted about 15 minutes alone in the sleeper cabin before she was out and pacing. She left Leo a note, but she could feel the tension between Leo and Zed and they were both absent, and she did not fancy being in the middle of that overnight.
She nearly walked slam into Sabine, and before she knew quite what she was doing she was in her and Lauralei’s cabin and had an etymology textbook open in her lap, a tea cup in her hand, and Lauralei’s excited voice telling her the habits of greater monarch butterflies.
Leoril Valcyne always found it easiest to be strong when someone else couldn’t be. Somehow he managed to guide Zed back to their cabin without collapsing into a puddle of tears and panic, and found it, to some small mercy, empty with two notes.
‘Leo, I’m going to wander. Don’t worry.’ -Ele
‘Elenora has been invited to an overnight stay in our cabin, don’t worry about her.’ -Sabine with a drawing of a *very* intricate butterfly on it.
Some of the weight slid from Leo’s shoulders, and he locked the door, the silencing runes flashing, sealing them in together and leaving the world outside on the stoop. Zed had collapsed into the bench seat and put his head back into his hands, and Leo slumped into the space next to him, feeling like he hadn’t tranced in years.
Leo closed his eyes and tipped his head back, trying not to bask in the proximity but failing royally. Tamping down tears with a monumental heave. He swallowed, hating himself a little bit. Not the time. Yet again, it was not the time for Leo to feel things. He let himself rub circles into Zed’s back when he didn’t emerge from his hands, and their own little train wreck trundled along on it’s tracks with the one they rode in.
Leo tried to think of something to say, something that would fix it. Something to put it all on the ground for five fucking minutes so he could… he took a shuddering breath.
“I’m sorry.” eventually fell out of his mouth.
Zed huffed out a sigh that might have passed for a laugh if Leo didn’t know his tells, even after a year apart. “I should be the one saying that, Leo.”
Leo shrugged, and looked at his hands in his lap.
“I missed you so much I couldn’t breathe,” Zed started, voice still thick with tears from their conversation in the luggage car, “and I can’t remember you coming back to me. I can’t remember kissing you twice. And I hate that so much I’m having a hard time… being me right now.”
Leo glanced up at him, and let his hand circle his shoulder blades again, rested his forehead against his arm, breathed in the smell of his soap and aftershave.
“We’ll get through it.”
Zed laughed humorlessly, a two beat noise that sounded to Leo like a disguised sob.
There was a moment of silence, the two of them sitting side by side in the train car staring at the floor, when Zed’s voice, more tentative than he’d ever heard it, rumbled from his chest.
Leo had to swallow to get his voice to work, “Yeah?”
“Can I, uh, give you a hug?”
Leo’s chest forgot to expand for a breath too long. His voice was spun sugar fragile when he managed a, “Please.”
One moment, he was beside Zed, not being hugged, and in the next eye blink, he was sprawled into his lap, being squeezed so tightly he couldn’t take a full breath. Leo clung back like his life depended on it, like a man clinging to flotsam in a hurricane, content to be short of breath if it meant he could keep his face buried in Zed’s neck. They rocked a bit with the train for a few moments, pressed tightly together, beyond words. Leo’s world at last, after a year- make that six- straight years of hell, narrowed to Zed in front of him, all the other bullshit left on the outside of the train compartment’s locked sliding door.
Leo took a deep breath, felt some of his tension fall away. Zed loosened his grip enough to put both hands on Leo’s narrow hips so he could pull back enough to meet his eyes. Zed looked… haunted. Leo let his hand cup his cheek, thumb swiping over his cheek bone, avoiding his cheek piercing for courtesy’s sake. Zed closed his eyes and leaned into Leo’s palm with his exhale, like he was reveling in their proximity as much as Leo was.
“I missed you.” he murmured into his palm after a moment.
“I missed you, too.” Leo whispered, hoping Zed had gotten an idea of just how much.
Zed’s thumb traced over Leo’s scar from the battle with the crag cat.
“Who gave you this?” he murmured.
“A giant Oscayan crag cat.” Leo said, tamping down his smile.
Zed exhaled shakily. Leo lost his battle with good sense and was kissing him before he’d made the conscious decision to. Immediately Zed’s hand was in his hair, the other a warm bar against his back pressing them together as he leaned back into the bench seat. Leo sighed into the kiss, and finally let the tension of a year of absolute fucking misery fall away.
Kissing Zed had always been playing with fire- but kissing him straddling his lap was something else entirely. Leo loved the hand in his hair, the feeling of him breathing against his own chest, the heat of him, the softness, so close Leo felt like he’d been freezing for years and hadn’t noticed. They came up for air, and before someone could start talking and knock the whole thing down again, Leo bit one of the flowers delicately inked into his neck.
Several things happened at once that all combined to spin Leo’s top so fast he got vertigo. Zed’s hands tightened their grip on his hip and in his hair sharply enough to make Leo gasp, and his hips rocked up in a stilted reaction into Leo where he was held firm in Zed’s grasp, and they were gone.
Leo watched his gorgeous, deep skin flush ruddy with heat, and bit another flower tattoo, drawing it into his mouth with a sharp suction. A noise fell out of Zed’s mouth Leo wanted to burn into his mind forever, and he felt a brush of metal against the point of his ear, all the warning he got before Zed drew the delicate tip of his ear into his mouth. It was Leo’s turn to restrain himself from rocking his hips down into Zed’s lap like a horny teen. He was so wet it felt obscene- just from this, just from this and he was undone entirely.
“Please.” Leo gasped against Zed’s neck.
“Please what, boss?” Zed’s voice was a deep rumble right beside his ear, the brush of tusk and tooth against the sensitive shell of Leo’s ear made his toes curl inside his boots.
“Touch me.” Leo gasped, and slipped his hands under Zed’s ever present vest and shoved it off his shoulders.
Zed’s hands were gone for a second while he shrugged the rest of the way out of his shirt, and then they were sweeping down from Leo’s shoulder blades in a slow, confident sweep that ended with him getting a generous handful of Leo’s ass in each hand and grinning his lopsided grin up at him. Leo’s mouth fell open, and Zed guided his hips through a slow, agonizingly hot roll over the bulge in his pants.
“Like this?” Zed drawled in his ear.
Leo sucked a mark into his neck and rolled his hips against Zed again before tugging his shirt free of his pants, slinging it over his head and onto the opposite bench, actions speaking louder than words. Zed’s hands immediately replaced his shirt, sliding over abs and ribs to run delicately over his chest. His fingers grazed his surgical scars, but Leo was beyond self consciousness as Zed’s hips rolled up into his again, seemingly without his expressed intention, just from the sight of him.
“Like what you see?”
Zed’s gentle smile edged with something that made Leo’s blood heat to a simmer, and his thumbs swiped air light over his nipples. Leo’s legs clenched around Zed’s thighs, and Leo heard his breath catch. It was like throwing water on a grease fire to Leo’s remaining self control. Zed’s large thumbs pressed in a tight little circle over his achingly hard nipples, and Leo’s eyes rolled back in his head.
His love didn’t reply, just smiled a slow, dangerous smile and circled his thumbs over Leo’s nipples again, rougher than before, before again retreating to feather light touches. The contrast made the room spin, Leo was sure he’d never ached so much for sex in his life. He rolled his hips more than a little desperately, unable to hold back a whimper he would have been embarrassed over if it hadn’t made Zed’s mouth fall open and his thumbs circle his nipples again in praise.
Zed gasped in a breath. “Leo, we either need to cool it or turn down the bed, because I’m not gonna do this for the first time with you on a bench.”
“Pull the bed down.” Leo ordered, and then sucked Zed’s earlobe into his mouth, past caring about the location and fully fixated on their inevitable end point at this rate.
Zed dragged in a ragged breath, and then stood like Leo wasn’t plastered to him, holding Leo where he wanted him with one hand and pulling the lever that collapsed the bench into a bed. It was all incredibly sexy, and Leo opened his mouth to say so, only to find himself lying on his back in an instant.
Zed had thrown him onto the bed, and had a patient, predatory look on his face as he watched Leo from the edge of the rumpled mattress where he was sliding his shoes off and unbuckling his belt. Leo’s legs rubbed together of their own accord, desperate for any friction to ease the throbbing between his legs.
“Now, Leoril, you know that won’t help.”
His full name sent an electric jolt straight through him, and he nearly moaned just from the hand Zed put on his ankle, tugging his shoes off and dumping them to the floor unceremoniously. Zed’s large hand brushed his calf and swept up over the inside of his knee and up his thigh. Even with his pants still on, Leo gasped in a breath. Zed’s hand spanned his stomach for a moment, a warm weight Leo wasn’t quite expecting, before he knelt at the edge of the bed and pulled Leoril to him like he weighed as much as a pillow.
He looked at Zed Stonebloom, looking up at him from between his thighs, and thought dazedly, how am I still getting wetter? The first button of his pants popped free, and Leo suddenly needed them off immediately so he could have Zed’s hands on as much of his skin as possible. Zed hooked the waist of his pants and his underwear too, stripping them off and turning the tailored pants inside out as he went. Leo kicked them off his ankles and forgot they existed before they landed. And then Zed’s large, warm hands were on his knees, easing them apart. Leo felt his own wetness, and found he couldn’t look into Zed’s face for a moment.
There was a pause, and a reverent kiss pressed just above his knee, cold tusk jewelry a thrilling contrast to his warm lips and the wet suction he transformed his kiss into, like he couldn’t help himself- like he was just as desperate as Leo was.
Leo whimpered when he pressed another open mouthed kiss to the delicate blue skin midway down his inner thigh, and Zed’s voice murmured, “I know, my love, I know.” into his thigh, before spanning his hands on either hip crease and sweeping his thumbs up the sides of Leo’s center, the pressure on either side of his throbbing clit, but not quite where he so fucking desperately wanted it.
Leo kicked his head back into the mattress, “Please- oh my God, Zed, please.”
Zed used one bent knuckle, and swept it through Leo’s wetness, right up his core and over his clit. Leo’s hands shot into the pillow above his head, chest heaving. Zed mouthed at the place where his inner thigh became his hip, tusks nudging into the sensitive flesh and making Leo wish he’d- a ragged gasp tore through him, as Zed, like he’d read his thoughts, gently but firmly bit his inner thigh, tusks and teeth denting into his skin with just the hint of a dull ache.
Leo could have died there- but Zed had apparently teased to his heart's content. He caught Leo’s gaze and held it as he licked a long stripe up to his clit, before drawing it into his mouth in a gentle pull, and releasing it with a pop of suction.
Leo couldn’t have stifled his moan if he wanted to, and Zed’s hands moved to his hips to keep them from bucking up into his face, giving him no option but to weather the storm. Zed licked another long, agonizingly slow flat tongued stripe through his pussy, lingering again on his clit, and moaned into Leo, “You taste so fucking good.” Before drawing Leo’s aching clit again into his mouth and working him over in earnest.
Leo wound his hands through Zed’s hair and held on for dear life, trying in vain to rock his hips into Zed’s face, trying in vain to hold himself together when he felt on the edge of flying to pieces already. And they were only beginning.
Zed changed his grip on Leo’s hips to free a hand, and Leo gasped a strangled note when he figured out why.
“Yes?” Zed’s mouth was still mostly occupied, but he found the time to ask, catching Leo’s gaze and raising a brow, and it made Leo melt a bit.
“Holy fuck yes!” was out of his mouth in an instant.
Leo felt Zed smile against him, and his middle finger slid into him in a gentle push, giving him a moment to adjust to the feeling. Leo didn’t want a moment to adjust. There was no adjusting to being on the edge of orgasm for a solid ten minutes.
“More.” his voice was needy, almost a whine.
Zed smiled a slow, dangerous smile.
The patient amusement in Zed's voice sent a spike of pure heat straight through Leo. He could feel his orgasm building like a spring coiled too tightly, the pressure building to the point of overload.
“I could do this forever.” Zed murmured onto his clit, curling his fingers inside Leo and watching his orgasm crash into him like the breakers into shore.
“Gonna!” was all Leo managed to bite out before his orgasm hit him like an oncoming train.
When Leo shattered, Zed was surprised their rail car didn’t fly off it’s tracks with the force of it. The taste of Leo flooded into his mouth and down his still working wrist. He let himself be a bit cruel and drag it out, stroking him with his tongue and tusks, unwilling for this to be over yet, for the fucking world to rush back in around them.
There were a few moments of silence in the cabin as Leo remembered how to breathe and have a heartbeat, and Zed tried to pick up his shattered mask of indifference. He pressed another reverent kiss to Leo’s thigh, still draped over his shoulder, and found he didn’t want to remove it from there. Ever. Leoril was spread out under him on the mattress, gloriously naked, hair fanned out around his head and pretty blue skin flushed purple on his chest and cheeks, Zed’s spit and his own wetness shining in between his thighs from his own gentle glow in the low light.
“You’re gorgeous.” Zed murmured into his thigh, dragging his hands down Leo’s sides.
Leo smiled like an angel, skin glowing faintly in the dim cabin like some kind of fey creature, and then he opened his mouth and uttered the most filthy thing Zed had ever heard him say.
“And I’m about to put your entire dick down my throat.”
Aforementioned dick kicked so painfully in his loose cotton pants Zed was for a moment afraid he’d finished just from the thought alone. He bit Leo’s thigh, letting him feel his tusks, drawing a satisfying yelp from his tiny, vicious lover.
“I knew you’d have a filthy mouth.”
Leo smirked at him and started to sit up. “As much as I love to talk, you should have guessed.”
Zed was kissing him the next instant, letting his legs fall from his shoulders to pull him closer, bundling him closer for a moment, some expansive feeling in his chest.
“I meant it.” Leo interrupted. “Get up here. I want you in my mouth.”
And honestly, how could Zed argue with that?
He let Leo arange him where he wanted, and ended up sprawled on the opposite bench, kicking his pants to the ground and trying not to be self conscious while Leo knelt between his knees, look on his face that made Zed’s pulse kick faster than it already was.
“It’s not gonna take much, you’ve already done a number on me.” Zed warned, and Leo’s eyes flicked up at him from between his knees, something warm and kind flashing across his face Zed was too addled to read.
They both watched the pearl of precum gather at his head and slip down the underside, and before Zed had braced himself Leo caught it on the flat of his tongue. His breath whooshed from his chest in a single collapse of his lungs.
He struggled to remember the next step of the breathing process as Leoril worked his mouth over his head, and managed to drag in a breath, only for it to rush back out as, “Leo! Leo holy fuck!”
Leo eased down a bit further, a smile on the corner of his stretched wide mouth, and Zed heard his molars creak he clenched his jaw so hard, before he gasped in another breath, and Leo hummed a satisfied sound against him that made his eyes unfocus. The heat of him- the wetness slowly moving down his length was dangerously perfect, and he was already so close- Zed wound his hands through Leo’s hair, gathering it out of his way and grateful to have something to hold on to as Leo bobbed down ever closer to his base, and he fought against his orgasm for all it was worth, wanting this moment to last for fucking eternity.
Leo’s hand gripped his base, and Zed wheezed out his name, the hand now working in time with his wicked, wicked mouth to tip his world on its axis tightened its grip further. One of Zed’s hands fell from Leo’s hair to cup his jaw as he finally lost his losing battle, a strangled, “Love, I-” the only warning he managed to grit out before he was spilling into Leo’s mouth, and Leo’s hand was helping him along.
For a few moments, Zed’s world faded to the drifting, sated feeling of Leo’s hands running up and down his thighs, and the sweet absence of craving. But the ocean only ever pulled back, it never went away entirely, the old familiar ache settled back around his shoulders like a loose noose, just waiting for him to stumble into and catch himself on by the neck. He dragged a sex drunk, smiling Leo up and into him, tucking his head briefly into the side of his neck, pressing his eyelids into the impossibly soft, glowing skin. He took a deep breath to center himself. He’d beat this goddamn thing once, and done it for three years. He could do it again.
Leo busied himself untangling the knots he’d pulled into Zed’s hair while he moved them back over to their bed. Their bed, even if just for tonight. The thought made his chest warm, some snarly, long latent instinct casting his eyes up to check the locks, the window, before tucking Leo to his side and pressing his lips and tusks into Leo’s forehead.
Zed could feel him churning over something he was about to say, and a smile crept across his face. Leo looked up into him from his spot curled into him, and Zed kissed him, just because he could. He pulled away to a view of Leo’s softest smile, and found himself running his thumb over his lower lip just to see if it felt as soft to his thumb as it looked. It did.
“So how long did you want to do that?” Leo’s voice was edged with amusement, but Zed heard the sincerity all the same.
Zed didn’t even have to consider. “Well, I saw this pretty blue boy getting his shit rocked at a terrible bar…”
Leo smiled the satisfied smile of a cat that had caught it’s mouse, and Zed asked, “What about you?”
“Well, this stupidly handsome guy saved me after getting my shit rocked at a terrible bar…”
Zed kissed him again, and Leo pulled his lower lip away from his teeth. The wanting him, it seemed to Zed, would never stop, even when he had him, even when he was so close he could feel his eyelashes. He won his lip back after a few moments and a positively cruel nip from Leo’s elongated elf canines.
“Not that I won’t go for round two, Leo, but you did mention something about rest and how badly we both needed it earlier.”
Leo smiled at his own name, like he liked hearing Zed say it; then cracked a yawn so big Zed got a lovely view of his catlike canines before tucking his head under Zed’s chin and sighing like Zed’s chest and stomach was the most comfortable trancing location he’d ever found.
“Round two. Earliest possible opportunity.” he murmured into his chest, and pressed a kiss to another one of Zed’s tattoos.
“It’s a date.” Zed said into his hair.
He felt Leo smile against his chest, and stroked a hand down his back. Leo sighed another deep sigh, like all it took for the weight of the world to fall off his shoulders was someone to treat him gently. Zed kept his hand moving until he fell into the most restful sleep he’d gotten in… eleven months, two weeks, and three days.