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Clarke couldn't stop staring at Bellamy.
To be fair, that was how she was normally when Bellamy was around, sneaking glances at him, a soft smile on her face, his presence demanding her attention always.
But this was different, she couldn't stop looking at his hair.
Or more accurately the confetti in his hair.
Bellamy had been helping Monty and Harper with the pinata for Jordan's birthday and Clarke watched, eyes hungrily taking him in as he stood there in his red tank top, muscles bulging as he held the rope for the pinata tightly.
He had been smiling wide as the kids hit the pinata with a stick, he winked at her when he caught her eyes and Clarke had takne a rather long sip of her drink, visions of Bellamy's hands on her filling her mind, the fantasy of him tying her to bed as she squirmed begging him to fuck had her turning red.
Didn't help that when Jordan hit the pinata, Bellamy cheered encouraging him and wow he was a really good godfather.
Bellamy cheered when Jordan managed to break the pinata with Jasper's help, all the kids cheering and Clarke laughed.
Bellamy climbed down from where he was perched in the tree and snagged some chocolate on the ground before making his way to her. "Kiss?"
Clarke's cheeks burn as she snatches the chocolate from his palm, unwrapping it and popping it into her mouth. Jordan runs up to them, wanting to show his godparents his candy stash and Bellamy crouches down to coo over the candy and Clarke shakes her head fondly, she's going to stay standing up so she can help Bellamy up to his feet later, his old man knees probably groaning in pain.
That's when she sees it, confetti in Bellamy's hair- scraps of blue glitter paper dotting his hair, sticking to his curls.
Clarke remembers Emori messing with Bellamy's hair and she wonders if the girl had been the one to put the confetti in there. It was the type of mischief she would be into.
Clarke can't stop staring at the confetti, would it be weird of her to brush it off? For her to gently run her fingers through his hair, to carefully pick out every single strand of confetti?
That's the polite thing to do, as his best friend, that's her job, to make sure he looks his best.
Right?
She stretches out her hand when Bellamy stands up suddenly and her hand ends up grazing his stomach.
She freezes.
"You got something on your shirt!"
Bellamy's hand rests on top of hers as he looks down at his shirt to see the small little speck and Clarke tries to get herself to stop blushing at the feeling of Bellamy's large hand on top of hers.
"Don't see anything, you are you aren't looking for an excuse to make fun of me."
Clarke laughs, the tension in her body disappearing.
"If I wanted to make fun of you I would tell everyone how I had to talk you out of getting Jordan the Illiad."
"It's a classic!"
"Bell he's three!"
"It's never too early."
"Nerd."
She bumps his hip and he laughs, his hand coming to rest around her waist steering her to where Miller and Anya are, beers in their hand while Luna and Bryan look at them amused.
"What did we miss?"
"Anya and Miller trying to pin the tail on the donkey... except it wasn't a donkey. It was Monty's ass."
Bellamy nearly chokes on his beer and Clarke smiles, Luna has a way of giving such great news in the most causal way.
"You're next Blake, go walk around while we try to pin your ass."
Bellamy raises an eyebrow, smirking. "If I remembered correctly, I pinned your ass."
Bryan snorts and Miller looks at Bellamy, up and down."
"Time for a rematch."
"What are we up to?"
"We are going to try to pin the tail on Blake's ass."
Roan grins, "I'm in."
Bellamy groans, burying his face into Clarke's hair and Clarke shakes her head.
"Count me in too."
Bellamy's head shoots up from where he's nuzzling her hair, a strange look in his eyes and he licks his lips, nervously.
Then just as quick as the look appears in his eyes, it disappears.
"Traitor."
Bellamy nudges Miller over sitting on the bench and pulling Clarke onto his knee, like normal but in light of her desire to pick out all the confetti in his hair and her joke about wanting to pin his ass, this feels different.
She's more aware of him, the way he smells, how his skin feels under her neck, the rumble of his chest and throat and he mummers in agreement to whatever Roan is saying.
They're talking about a marathon coming up and that they all signed up for and Clarke could care less. Bellamy has tried to convince her to start running with him and after a week she quit, she would settle for her yoga and sleeping in and other fun ways to burn calories.
Without even thinking or paying much attention, her fingers start to scratch the back of his neck, playing with the curls there and Bellamy sees to relax even more.
Her fingers start crawling up to his hair and there's a piece of confetti there and she plucks it out, tossing it to the side and moves on to the next piece of confetti.
Clarke busies herself, pulling out the pieces of confetti and running her fingers through Bellamy's soft hair, humming slightly.
How on earth has she not done this sooner? He's always playing with her hair, twirling the strands when he's bored and she's sitting next to him.
She's so focused on playing with his hair, distracted by the flecks of blue confetti that she doesn't realize that the conversation around her has stopped.
She looks up to see Roan smirking at her and her hands jerk away from Bellamy's hair like they've been set on fire.
"If you're done with your little...foreplay, there are children present."
Clarke cheeks flush red and she opens her mouth but Bellamy beats her to it.
"Fuck off Roan."
His voice sounds deeper than usual, like he's holding back something and Clarke's eyes drift down to the beer bottle in his hand, and the way he is gripping it tightly.
"Don't you mean fuck me Cl-"
Bellamy's arm tightens around her waist and Clarke gasps as Bellamy stands up, her hands gripping his shoulder as she slides off his knee.
Bellamy glares at Roan while Roan smirks at him and Clarke looks between them, the amusement on Roan's face, the way Bellamy's jaw is clenched.
She's expecting Bellamy to throw a punch and she tugs on his arm.
"Bell?"
He turns to look at her and Clarke has to stop herself from running her hand across his jaw.
His eyes seem to soften and Luna gently steers Roan away.
"Let's go find our godson?"
She and Bellamy steal Jordan from Jasper, the little boy giggling as Bellamy scoops him up.
"How's my favorite boy?"
Jordan starts to babble, tugging on Clarke's hair as he squirms out of Bellamy's arms to Clarke's his hands slapping her chest and Clarke laughs.
"Sorry buddy, no food here."
Jordan screws up his face like he's about to cry and Bellamy laughs.
"Believe buddy, I'm disappointed too."
Clarke blushes again and Bellamy tickles Jordan's feet, the boy kicking his feet joyfully, his hands tangling with Clarke's hair and Bellamy carefully tugs it out of Jordan's grasp.
"Pretty like a princess isn't she buddy?"
"Stop Bellamy. I swear if he calls me Princess and not Auntie Clarke..."
"But that's who you are."
"Charming as always Bell."
Bellamy winks, "Only for my favorite girl."
Harper calls for them and it gives Clarke a chance to restart her heart, her heart pounding at Bellamy's words.
He's always been flirty but it seems to be different today.
Clarke puzzles over it while the sing Happy Birthday, Bellamy's waist slung around her hips, his low voice in her ears.
Clarke hands out the cake while Bellamy busies himself taking pictures of the little family, clicking away as Jordan smashes the cake with his little fists.
The next hour keeps them both busy and both away from each other but Clarke is very aware of Bellamy's eyes on her as she collects plates of half eaten cake, and does the dishs and Bellamy takes Jordan's presents upstairs.
Clarke collaspes onto her couch exhausted as Bellamy sinks down next to her.
"Who knew children's birthday parties would be so exhuasting?"
"Something to look forward to one day."
Bellamy's eyes are dark as he looks at her and Clarke's breath catches in her throat as he tucks some hair behind her ear.
"We make a good team. "
"We've been a team for years, Bellamy. We took care of everyone in college."
"The kids were determined to get themselves killed."
"And look at them now, upstanding citizens."
"We did good, didn't we?"
Bellamy scoots closer to her, his hand moving towards the back of her neck.
"How about we raise a few more?"
Clarke's heart is in her throat, quite possibly her ears.
Is this a dream?
"Like platonically? Bellamy that's a little much even for us."
She laughs, eye searching waiting for him to join in on her laughter because he's joking right? But his eyes are steady, dark and she watches as his shoulder slump and he pulls away.
"Right, I don't know what I was thinking." He gets up from the couch and Clarke feels a coldness settle in her chest as he runs a hand through her hair.
"It's late I should go."
"Bellamy, it's late. I thought you were going to stay, watch a movie."
"I'm tired."
His voice lacks the familair warmth, it's like she's a stranger, like he's trying to keep in together in front of her.
Maybe it wasn't a joke.
Maybe he wanted to raise babies with her in a non platonic way.
Maybe all those moments, the ones that made her heart races were all excuses to be near her, to touch her, to love her without her knowing, the way she used the fact that he had confetti in his hair earlier to play with his hair.
"You had confetti in your hair today."
Bellamy pauses as he puts his jacket on. "You had confetti and I kept getting distracted and I used it as an excuse to play with your hair cause I always wanted to but I was to scared to do so, one thing to do it drunk, another to do it sober. And all I could think about was you and me, and the confetti in your hair and thinking that maybe one day, we would have a kid and you would end up with glitter or confetti in your hair and how you would laugh and beam and be the perfect dad and the confetti, it was an excuse to let me live out something I always wanted to do but was too scared to do so becasue I've been in love with you for years and I can't believe it takes dumb pieces of blue confetti in your hair to get me to say this to you."
Bellamy's looking at her and for the first time in forever, Clarke can't tell what he is thinking. He runs a hand through his hair and she watches his tongue dart out, licking at his lips before he smirks. "Emori put glitter in my hair... I could use a hand getting it out? If you need another excuse..."
Clarke's heart is pounding again but for a different reason.
"I'm kinda hoping I don't need an excuse anymore."
She holds out a hand and he follows her to her bathroom where the two of them strip down silently.
As soon as the water hits their bodies, Bellamy is there, scrubbing her hair and Clarke moans as his fingers massage her head.
"I thought I was supposed to getting thr glitter out of your hair."
He moves her hair to the side and presses a soft kiss to her shoulder.
"Been thinking about this for a long time."
His hands drift down the front of her, pulling her closer and she can feel him against the cleft of her ass. One of his hands cups her breast, while the other lands on her stomach and Clarke knows what he's thinking and she turns her head, kissing his jaw.
"Ask me again?"
"Want to raise a kid again with me?"
She turns, wrapping her arms around him neck, fingers playing with the wet curls on the back of his neck, pulling him closer until he's only a centimetrer away from her.
"I want it all with you- the ring, the kid and the dog, the white picket fence."
She's not sure who moves to kiss who but his lips are soft and his hands drift from her waist to her ass, rocking himself against her and Clarke moans.
He kisses his way down her body and Clarke wraps a leg around his waist and when he slides into her, it's like coming home.
They stay in there until the water is cold and after they stumble out, Bellamy wraps in her a bunch of towels, drying her hair and then using her comb to untangle her hair.
Clarke watches from the mirror and he catches her eyes.
"You're not the only one who wants an excuse to play with hair. "
"Maybe we don't need excuses anymore."