every turn a surprise

by mixtapestar

Summary:

When Brendon is 10 years old, weird things start happening. He quickly discovers his ability to read minds, and then he spends several years at the Academy, learning how to control it. After he is forced to run away to avoid being drafted for his ability, he gets hired onto a spaceship, where he meets Spencer, Ryan, and Jon. Things just get crazier from there, especially when he starts to fall in love with more than one of his coworkers.

Notes:

This story is over 2 years coming, so I want to thank anyone who offered support or encouragement over the months. Thanks especially to R for handholding and beta work. <3 Title is from "A Whole New World" because I'm just that cheesy.

---

"Bullshit," Brendon challenges, and Jon curses as he admits defeat by picking up the stack of cards.

"That's what you get for playing a thinking game with a mind reader," Ryan says.

Spencer shakes his head. "Brendon wouldn't cheat."

"Thank you, Spencer. At least someone has some faith in me."

Jon is still surprised. "Every time, though. How could you have possibly known--"

"Okay, maybe I picked up a few things from my school days." At everyone's judging looks, Brendon rushes to defend himself. "It's not cheating! I just know you so well, and with everything I've learned, I can tell when you're lying. I'm not doing it on purpose."

Ryan leans forward in his chair, his interest obvious. "So if we played two truths and a lie...?"

Brendon waves a hand. "No contest."

"Alright," Ryan says, tone disbelieving. "I dropped out of school, I've been arrested before, and I cheated on my entrance exam for this ship."

Brendon raises his eyebrows. "The first one's the lie, but the last one's not entirely true either."

Ryan looks impressed, but refuses to elaborate further. Next, Jon gives the game a try, and after some consideration, Brendon points out that none of them are quite true, but the story about him drinking outside the ship while in space is the biggest lie. Jon laughs, equally impressed, and explains what really happened.

They're all laughing at the image of Jon drunkenly stumbling into a spacesuit when the ship jolts suddenly, and they all share a nervous look. After a few seconds, Spencer dismisses it. "Probably just an engine fault. I'm sure the captain will take care of it."

Getting back into the game, Spencer thinks for a moment, but Brendon knows in an instant that his lie is the one about the glasses.

The jolt happens again a few minutes later, and they do their best to ignore it. But then the third time, Spencer's expression turns serious and he says, "I'm gonna talk to the captain." He heads into the elevator, and Brendon tries not to feel nervous.

Spencer's gone for a while, and the jolting keeps happening. Eventually, Brendon can't take it anymore. "Shouldn't Spence be back by now?"

He goes to the computer panel and starts pressing buttons, weaving his way into the internal system with ease. Once he's in, it shouldn't be hard to tell if this is a ship malfunction or an external force.

"Do you think this is... it?" Ryan says, voice even, but Brendon can sense his wariness. Brendon looks up just in time to see Jon take his hand.

"No, it can't be," Jon says definitively, though Brendon hears the worry in his voice. "Not today."

Brendon isn't so sure. He pulls up the diagnostics right as the elevator dings to indicate Spencer's return. Everything currently looks normal, and before Brendon can page back to the records from the past hour, Jon and Ryan burst out laughing.

"False alarm," Spencer says, sounding miserable, and that's when Brendon looks up to see him covered in oil. Brendon's anxiety combined with the surprise of seeing Spencer's nice clothes so destroyed make a laugh bubble up inside of him, and soon all three of them are laughing uncontrollably.

"What happened?" Brendon says, Spencer's death glare only making him feel slightly guilty.

"Did you fall in the oil stores?" Ryan says through his laughter.

"There was a malfunction with the engine," Spencer says, ignoring him. He starts undoing the buttons on his shirt without looking up at them. "They needed an extra set of hands."

"And an extra set of clothes, apparently."

"Looks more like target practice to me."

The tension starts to fade from Brendon's shoulders as he laughs, but he doesn't contribute. He shares a look with Spencer and instead of making another joke, he just says, "Can I help you get cleaned up?"

Spencer gets his shirt unbuttoned and nods, obviously noting Brendon's relief that the crisis has been averted. Jon and Ryan make noises of protest as they leave, and Spencer tosses his shirt at them. As Spencer makes a quip about them sleeping on the couch tonight, Brendon laughs, trying not to dwell on the loudest thought in all of their heads: next time probably won't be a false alarm.

******

MANY YEARS EARLIER

When Brendon Urie is 10 years old, weird things start happening. At first it isn't so bad, not constant, but he suddenly hears his family say things at random, and when he responds to them, they either freak out or tell him that he's crazy. Eventually, his parents explain to him that as weird as it sounds, he's clearly able to read minds. Within the next six months, he starts to hear too much, and his head feels like it's exploding all of the time. His parents don't know what to do, and when they discover a medicine that will help clear his head, they seize the opportunity. It works; Brendon doesn't hear thoughts anymore. He doesn't, in fact, feel much of anything.

One day, about a week after Brendon turns 12, he runs away from home. When they find him, he freaks out because of all the noise in his head, and he won't talk to anyone but his sister, and only if she's alone. He tells her that he can't do it anymore, the noise or the medicine. The noise makes him feel like he's dying, and the medicine makes him feel like he's dead. He confides in her that he'll go live in the forest, where there are only animals and trees, and maybe she can visit him sometimes, because her thoughts are always so soft in his head. She holds his hand and says she'll bring him leftovers like they always do for the stray cat out back, and he can tell her stories about the animals and the trees.

Unfortunately, that plan is never going to work. The police get involved in finding Brendon, and though Brendon never knows the whole story, they find out about Brendon's ability and tell his parents all about the Academy. Grateful for any sort of help, and with the promise of this place being catered to kids just like Brendon, they accept the invitation immediately. Brendon doesn't really understand, but they promise him if he stays on the medicine for just a few more days, he'll never have to take it again and the noise will stop.

So he goes to the school. The noise doesn't stop, but he has a room that he can go to, alone, where there's no noise, and during the day there's a nameless guy who tries to teach him how to stop the noises all on his own. Other than these lessons, he learns all the others on the computer, and he finds he's able to converse with a computer so much easier than with a teacher who has all this noise surrounding him. He's never really understood it all before. His family had computers of course, but he'd only been allowed to use them for certain tasks like research and basic communication, and there had been blocks to keep him from doing more than the bare minimum. This computer, though, is completely his own (or at least, that's what he's been told), and he's allowed to do anything with it that he wishes. He spends hours every day on his lessons, not realizing until he's told that he's way ahead of the normal curriculum for his age. He just enjoys the steady, predictable pace of a computer, and he doesn't often get bored because he can do whatever he wants. His computer is his friend, really. He can speak to it, and it will speak back. It makes so much more sense to him than people do.

One day, everything clicks into place just like the computer stuff always does, and Brendon can't hear his teacher's thoughts anymore. He can feel the change like the press of a button, and he can press it on or off, and it works. His teacher is thrilled to hear it, and takes him out to meet some people to see if it works. It doesn't work perfectly; he has trouble when there are a lot of people, but his teacher assures him that it'll become easier with time. Brendon starts to get excited, hoping that he'll get it down quickly and then he'll only have to work with his computer and never deal with people. He works extra hard to block and unblock, and his teacher is really positive. He assures Brendon that most kids his age never get this far.

Brendon is all smiles on the day that his teacher says he's completely mastered the art of blocking out the thoughts of others. Brendon can still hear the whisper of thoughts when he's around people, but he doesn't have to concentrate to ignore them any longer; it just comes naturally. He's even starting to make a few friends, sort of. It's not easy for him, because most of the kids remember him as the kid that freaked out every time he came to the cafeteria for the first few days he was there. That doesn't matter, though, because he can just sit with his computer and forget about all of them.

His teacher, though, returns Brendon's smile on that day and says that now they can move on to something else, something more exciting. Brendon's chest feels heavy, and he says he doesn't understand. His teacher says that now that Brendon is starting to have some control over his ability, he can use it. He can turn that noise into something that can be filtered and listened to, something he can use to his own advantage. Brendon doesn't like that. It doesn't sound right. But his teacher assures him that it's perfectly normal for people like them, that any misgivings he has are only from growing up with ordinary people.

Brendon's miserable for a while after that. He goes to lessons because he doesn't have a choice; he tried to skip once, and his teacher just showed up to get him. He can't fake being sick, because his teacher can tell. He learns all about sending messages to people with his mind, and how to direct them so that only one person can hear it, and how to shield his own mind so other people can't read his thoughts. This idea confuses Brendon, because sure, he assumed other people could read his mind - his teacher does it often enough - but he always assumed that was how it worked. It doesn't seem fair to him that he can read anyone's mind, but he can make it so that no one can read his. His teacher explains that it's a form of protection against anyone who might use their powers for evil, but Brendon thinks he must be exaggerating. Still, if it'll keep his teacher from reading his thoughts all the time, he's all for it.

He's encouraged to hang out with the other "specials" at least a couple times a week, so he does it exactly twice a week to avoid a lecture. The only happy times he has are when he's left alone on his computer, and he starts to build new things from it, games for fun and programs that do his math homework for him. He keeps waiting to get in trouble for the latter, but no one ever says anything.

The years pass, and he starts to truly master his ability. He's even got his own small group of friends, though he only sees them when he has to. He at least has people that he eats meals with, and sometimes he'll find them in the common rooms at night and watch a movie with them.

When he's 18, he changes teachers once again because the old one has nothing left to teach him. He's old enough by now to notice the wariness that each teacher shows when they say that.

His new teacher is really, really cool. Brendon's kinda weirded out by how cool she is. She admits to him straight up that no student to come out of the Academy has ever been able to do any of the stuff she can do, but she believes that if there's someone that can, it's him. She doesn't even try to teach him anything on that first day, just explains to him how big of a deal it is that he can do all this stuff, and how he has to be careful. He still has 4 years left with the Academy, and she's pretty sure there won't ever be another teacher after her.

Brendon doesn't know what to do with that information, and he's glad they left it at that. The thought that he's done after this teacher is a scary one, because what does he do when he leaves here? Technically, he supposes, he can do just about anything. He's learned enough that he can pass as normal pretty much anywhere, and he knows that he's taken in so much through his computer that he's way ahead of his grade level in his lessons. That entire afternoon, he daydreams of a routine: doing things with computers all day and going home and having a dog, or maybe he can work on a ship and talk to computers all day, and only have to deal with a few people for an hour or so each day. He could see the planets and collect pictures for his family and send them back, assuring them all that they had made the right decision to help him master his ability.

Over his time with Anjela, as she insists he call her, Brendon learns a lot. He had never given much thought to the fact that no one at the Academy shared their names, especially since he'd always heard about people in major cities choosing not to share, but after a long conversation with Anjela, he starts to see things differently. Anjela believes that hiding a name is hiding an identity, and maybe the world's overpopulation problem gives people an excuse to identify people according to their roles, but she doesn't think it's right. She doesn't think relationships can be genuine unless you give something of yourself to someone else, and a name is exactly the first thing that should be shared. Brendon listens to her opinion with eager ears, thinking about his grandmother and her stories of the old days. People had been so much more trusting back then, and Brendon had always listened to the stories like they were about some distant and unreachable world, but he realizes now that it's a choice not to be open in that way, a choice that he can still make.

On top of all that, Brendon learns that none of the 'powers that be' at the Academy really like Anjela. They claim to have no issues with her, sure, but the truth is that they're afraid of her because she's too smart for them. Brendon's not afraid of her, though. He learns more about telepathy from her than he ever would've imagined possible.

Some days, after he's mastered whatever they're working on for the day, Anjela will tell him stories of her past students. She switches it up from week to week. Sometimes, the stories will be aloud; other times, she'll pretend they're still working by telling him the stories only in his own head.

One thing that Anjela teaches him that he hadn't expected is how to filter someone into his thoughts. Now you don't want to do this with just anyone, she explains in a message only he can hear. Your defenses are strong, and I'd hate to see you throw that away because you're too trusting. Filtering someone into your thoughts means, even if they're a moderate telepath, they will be able to see any thought you have. There are ways to build further filters, but those mostly end in headaches. So you should only ever let someone in that you trust inherently. Do you understand?

Brendon nods, excited to ask questions, but Anjela keeps going.

It is entirely your decision, but I would advise that you not filter anyone into your thoughts until after you, she pauses, leave the Academy.

Brendon notices her pause and says, Why? before she can continue, but she continues in the same tone.

The Academy doesn't know that I'm teaching you this. My guess is that they don't even know of it. To the people here, there is never a trust deep enough to merit the lowering of your defenses. The cynical tone she attaches to this thought carries across, and Brendon wonders how she can stand to work here if she hates it so much. But I don't believe that, she continues, tone positive again. Some day, you may meet someone you trust completely, and you'll be glad you learned how to do this.

What are the odds that I'll not only meet someone that's a telepath out in the real world, but get along with them well enough to let them read my thoughts? he asks, thinking of the telepaths he knows at the Academy and pouring his doubt into his words.

It's more likely than you think, she says, tone amused now. Somehow, no matter how hard we try, we're always drawn back toward other specials.

Brendon smiles inside to think that Anjela includes him in that. Once he figures out how to do it, Anjela's the first person he's filtering into his mind. She's the only person he thinks he'll ever be able to trust, anyway.

His next few months with Anjela are filled with little tricks like that, things that she confides aren't really Academy-approved, but she thinks they're important enough to teach him anyway. Brendon has never enjoyed going to his telepathy class, but now he finds himself counting the days off and hoping to learn something new as soon as possible.

And then, one random day in October when he's 21, he learns that he doesn't have hope for a future of his own. Using only mental messages, Anjela explains to Brendon that 'graduation' from the Academy leads straight to conscription, and then he'll be one of the 'specials' that gets used for his ability in order to help the country. But it's never really about helping the country, it's about helping the agenda, and once it starts, it's almost impossible to get out. Brendon keeps his expression neutral because she'd asked him to, but inside his head he's freaking out. She tells him to think about this, and that they'll discuss it further in time, but for the time being, she asks him to just start thinking of what options he might have if he were to get out.

They don't meet every day, so Brendon has a few days to dwell on this. His world has come crashing down on him, and it's not exactly easy to deal with. The next time he does meet with Anjela, she knows he's not ready to face it, but he does ask a few questions. They spend the rest of the class working on something entirely different to give him more time.

He's only a few months away from graduation when he gets his chance. He says goodbye to Anjela mentally without showing emotion outwardly, but he uses words in his head that he can't lie about and sends them to her so that she knows how he feels. She had made him memorize a short list of safe locations, people he could trust, and as long as he can get far enough away from the Academy and stay among them, he should be fine. Anjela even told him that he could probably find a job, once he'd settled in somewhere, as long as he stuck close to the people she had suggested.

So he does it. He leaves. He has no ties to the Academy except for Anjela, and she promises him that she's able to take care of herself, but it's still hard for him to walk away.

Those first few days are miserable. He barely looks anyone in the eye on the buses, sure that the moment he does, they'll pass right through the shield around his mind and turn him in. He makes it to Chicago with no idea of how long it actually took to get there, feeling like he hasn't slept in weeks, and the first person he meets is Zack Hall, the bartender at the Shady Name. Brendon recognizes his name from Anjela's list, and he's so shocked and relieved to have actually made it that he pretty much collapses on one of the stools.

When Zack brings him his drink, he does a double take and then leans in close. "You're Anjela's student, aren't you? Brendon?"

Brendon tries not to tense up, because he was on her list, it's fine, but what if someone hears? He picks up his drink and nods without making eye contact.

Zack reaches out to clap Brendon on the shoulder, which makes Brendon flinch and spill beer down his shirt. "Try to relax, kid. Stick around for a couple hours, you're stayin' with me tonight."

"Oh, I, uh--" he flounders, using napkins to attempt to dry his clothes. He wants to protest, but really, where else is he gonna go? "Are you sure?"

"Of course. Any friend of Jelly's is a friend of mine."

Brendon has to set his drink down and laugh right out loud at 'Jelly,' and by the time he's calmed down, he and Zack are smiling and apparently friends. Zack tells him stories, and Brendon hangs on his every word, finding out more about what the one person he could really trust was like when out in the real world.

Zack gives him enough alcohol to make him stop freaking out, and Brendon is languid and happy by the time Zack shows him the way to his car.

"Wow, you are such a lightweight," Zack observes.

"No alcohol at the Academy!" Brendon says in a fake announcer voice, then starts giggling. "You're really strong," he observes as Zack practically carries him into his apartment. "Can you be my bodyguard? I really need a bodyguard." He maybe says bodyguard a few more times because it sounds funnier each time he says it, but Zack just rolls his eyes and pushes him toward the door.

"You can take the couch for tonight," Zack says once they're inside. "It's closer to the bathroom. We'll work the rest out after your hangover."

Brendon laughs a little bit, because he thinks it's supposed to be funny, but then he heads toward the couch and stumbles and suddenly the world is really topsy-turvy. "Topsy. Turvy," he says aloud, and Zack makes a frustrated noise. Next thing Brendon knows, he's on the couch, and Zack is ordering him to go to sleep.

When Brendon wakes up, he hates everything. He takes a long time to figure out why he hurts so much, an immediate worry about getting caught and tortured popping into his head, and then he wonders where the fuck he is. He sits up way too fast and then he has to take a moment to talk himself down from nausea. He remembers Zack suddenly, and the details are fuzzy, but he at least knows that he's safe. For now.

That reassuring thought is chased by a wave of nausea that he doesn't think he can talk down, so he runs for what he hopes is the bathroom - score one, it is - and spends the next half hour hating himself. Zack, the big, beautiful man that he is, gives Brendon a glass of water and some aspirin, mumbling something about making coffee. Coffee! Brendon loves Zack so much right now.

Somewhere around his second cup of coffee, glorious coffee, Brendon starts to worry. He'd barely even tasted alcohol before last night. He hadn't accidentally heard any thoughts, sure, but had his defenses been up 100 percent the whole time? Fuck. Anjela would not be happy when she heard about this.

Zack wanders out and starts pressing buttons on a wall-panel computer that Brendon hadn't known was there. He immediately starts wondering about its capabilities and specs, and his fingers itch to be back on a screen, organizing things and creating programs.

He's broken out of his reverie when Zack turns and speaks to him. "So here's the deal." Brendon braces himself for the worst. Thrown out on the street? He could manage, right? He had a list of places to go. "Jelly told me not to let you go off on your own yet, so you have to either stay here all day until I get back or come to the bar with me. But if you come to the bar with me, I'm not going to give you drinks anymore."

Brendon moans quietly, hands massaging his temples. "Deal. Listen, man, thanks for letting me stay here last night. Do you, uh..." And dammit, Brendon doesn't want to ask too much of Zack, but he doesn't know how else to find people he can trust. "D'you think you could help me find a job?"

Zack looks surprised for a second, but before Brendon can ask why, Zack says, "Well, I can probably get you a job waiting tables at the Shady Name, if you want. But dude, you don't have to run out and start working right away. Stay here for a couple weeks, get settled in."

Brendon shakes his head insistently, not quite believing that people this nice exist. "If I'm staying here, I'm paying you for it." Not to mention that the thought of sitting around a stranger's apartment all day with nothing to do sounds like the worst form of punishment.

Zack rolls his eyes. "Fine, I'll talk to my manager about adding you on as a waiter. You can probably start tomorrow."

"What, really?" No way could it be that simple.

Zack shrugs. "He's always complaining about wanting more help. We, uh, don't usually hire outsiders. It's a pretty underground type of place."

Brendon thinks of Anjela's assurances that this place was safe, and for the first time, wonders how a public place could claim that security. His confusion must show, because Zack laughs and adds, "Best not to ask questions, trust me. I don't really know what's up with you, but Jel seems to think you need protecting, so. Shady Name's the best place for you right now, if you want to work."

Brendon hesitates a moment, but then thinks fuck it and jumps up to give Zack a big hug. Zack laughs and lets Brendon hug him as long as he wants, which is more than Brendon is used to. His sometimes-friends at the Academy always put up with him when he hugged or touched them, but there was always a touch of please-get-off-me in the air of it. "Thank you," Brendon says, meaning it completely. He can't quite imagine what his life would've turned into if he hadn't gotten out of the Academy, but this has got to be at least a hundred times better.

"Get dressed," Zack tells him when he's finally all hugged out. "You can hang out at the bar. Hell, he might even let you start tonight."

Zack's boss is totally intense, but totally awesome, and Brendon charms him in record time by recognizing and commenting on the music playing in the bar. "You're hired!"

"How did you even know he was asking for a job?" Zack asks, amused.

"Oh please. Why else would you be bothering me at 3 in the afternoon? No one's had time to destroy any property yet."

Zack concedes this, but Brendon has a very distinct feeling he's missing something. He resists the reminder in his head that it'd be so simple to find out, just a quick look into their thoughts, and he smiles huge. "When can I start?"

******

The next few months are completely dull, but honestly a complete relief to Brendon. He doesn't even have reason to complain, because even though he misses his computer, he gets to have interactions with people that don't feel like obligations, and that feels almost as good. Every afternoon, he puts on the shades that make up his 'uniform' and smiles as he takes everyone's orders. Most of the people that frequent the bar work on ships, he discovers quickly, which means they're just passing through but they'll be back eventually. The boss makes a big deal about the waiters remembering customers' names when they give them out, and lucky for Brendon, he never forgets a name. More often than not, he has to help out other waiters, and even Zack sometimes. They all smile at him and tell him he's their baby genius, and every time, Brendon's chest feels tight and he tries not to think about how much more he could be doing with his life.

Zack knows that Brendon's not happy, but Brendon waves off his concern every time it comes up. He doesn't want to cause trouble for Zack, and he's sure that looking for a new job would be pushing his luck at this point. He's content enough with things as they are. Zack lets him use the computer in his apartment for shopping and keeping up with news, and Brendon tries to ignore the feeling that given five minutes to himself, he could do all kinds of stuff with the screen. But he's heard about computers being monitored and has no doubt that he would get caught.

Things change for him, just a little bit, but for the better, when the database goes down in the Shady Name. Everything seems tense already when Zack and Brendon show up for work, and before Brendon gets a chance to ask one of the wary-looking waiters, the boss tears out of his office looking frantic and shouting about "our worthless goddamn dependence on technology." He disappears back into his office, and Brendon cautiously asks Don what's going on.

Don looks unhappy. "I think Bossman's computer died on him. He's been in and out ever since I got here. We're all kinda worried it means we're gonna have to shut down." Brendon doesn't have to ask to know he means 'permanently.'

He's still not sure it's a good idea to come forward, but he doesn't know what he'd do without this job, and he knows Bossman's too set in his ways to hire anyone from the outside. He steps into the office and admits to knowing a thing or two about computers, and after a few minutes of Bossman cursing and ignoring him, he swivels around in his chair and says, "What?"

Brendon feels automatically guilty for a minute, but then repeats himself. Bossman's feral look dies down a bit and he politely tells Brendon that "I think we're gonna need more than 'a thing or two' to fix this mess."

The more he has to reveal about his talents, the more he's putting himself in danger, but he feels like this is maybe an exception to that rule. They only hire from the inside, right? "Okay, I know a thing or fifty about computers. Can I take a look?"

Bossman looks really doubtful, but he moves to let Brendon take over. His explanation of the problem isn't very helpful, but the computer responds to him as easily as anything else, and that's how Brendon knows whatever they're facing, it's fixable.

Fifteen minutes later, he restores the screen and runs a diagnostic test, and everything is fine. "Okay. I think we're good. Except, um." He turns in the chair to face Bossman, who looks really shell-shocked. Brendon tries not to notice. "You may have lost the data from yesterday's sales."

Bossman's eyes threaten to bug out of his head, and then Brendon's being lifted out of his chair into a hug. Brendon laughs, feeling a sense of accomplishment he hasn't felt in months, and hugs back.

After that, he's called back every day or so to "work his magic" on the computer, and the term "baby genius" seems to stick even more. Brendon doesn't mind it so much anymore, because at least he's done something worth praising this time. He stays over a few nights to tweak their system so that it will run more efficiently, and Bossman won't stop talking him up.

Brendon doesn't feel quite so restless after that, but at night, he still stares at the ceiling and wonders if this really is his only option.

"What would you do if you could have any job?" Brendon asks Zack during breakfast one morning (okay, afternoon).

Zack shrugs. "I dunno, dude. I'm pretty cool with what I do now. It pays the bills."

"Yeah, but like, if you'd get paid the same thing no matter what. What's your dream job?"

Zack shrugs again. "I think this might be my dream job. I get to hang out every day, and the only thing I have to do is mix drinks and make sure nobody throws up on Bossman's tiled floors."

Brendon nods and stares into his cereal.

"Why? What would you do?"

Brendon shrugs. He feels ridiculous now for bringing it up. Zack doesn't know about Brendon, and it would be a bad idea to tell him.

"C'mon, dude. If money was no issue."

Brendon twists his spoon and doesn't look up. "I kinda always wanted to work on a ship? I mean, nothing specific, but I've never had a chance to travel, and." He forces himself to take a bite of cereal and shrug like it doesn't matter.

Zack gives him a look that would feel like he's trying to read his mind, except Brendon would definitely know if Zack could do that. "You'd be totally kickass at working on a ship. All those computers, dude. You should look into it."

Brendon can only stare at Zack. He always puts everything so simply. Brendon doesn't even bother to argue with him this time. "Yeah, maybe."

And that's the last time Brendon brings it up for a long time.

******

Brendon is having a pretty awesome day. He's got the day off from the bar, but all his friends work there, so he's been hanging out all night, pulling the waiters away from the paying customers, drinking the watered-down drinks that Zack gives him, and generally having a good time. He doesn't know why he has the day off, but Bossman had insisted, so here he is, mingling with customers that he usually only speaks to for a few minutes as he hands over their order.

"Brendon!" he hears a voice call him over. This has been happening all night. It's like the customers know that he's free to hang out for tonight only, and are seizing the opportunity at every turn.

Brendon leaves the barstool and approaches the voice, discovering the source to be Pete Wentz. "Hi," he says politely, unsure how to react in the face of a table full of people, only half of whom he recognizes. That's new.

"Here, have a seat!" Pete insists, sliding impossibly close to his neighbor on the bench. Brendon sees that it's Patrick, and Patrick makes quite a show of pushing Pete from his position now half on his lap, but Pete ignores him. Brendon takes the invitation and sits, leaving plenty of room for Pete to spread back out, but he stays put. "What's up, man? This is the first I've seen you around here without the trademark shades."

Brendon laughs. Is that really how people are identifying him as off-duty tonight? "Bossman made me take the day off, but I guess I couldn't stay away. How long are you around?" He doesn't ask why Pete's with such a huge group. He's seen him in and out with Patrick, and sometimes a few other guys, but never a group this big.

"A few days, actually. Tying up some loose ends," he says vaguely, and Brendon is reminded that he has no idea what most of the shipmen that frequent the bar really do, other than go around on ships. "Here! Let me introduce you around," Pete says suddenly, and then Brendon is being told everyone's names and hearing stories that are probably none of his business.

"How do you know all these people?" Brendon can't help but ask.

"Oh! We're like, all going to be sorta kinda traveling together for the next few years." Brendon's head spins a little at that. The next few years? He doesn't even know what he's going to do for dinner.

"So you're all on the same ship?"

Pete looks at Brendon like he's crazy. "Are you kidding? We'd kill each other!"

Patrick cuts in helpfully to add, "We're joining with some other companies, making the same stops, even if we're not always working together. I think the point is to form bonds with more than just our ship, but I personally think it's just going to mean a lot more drinking." He looks warily at the guy to his left, who Brendon remembers is named Gabe. Gabe doesn't notice the attention, though, because he's too busy trying to steal a drink from the guy next to him - William.

"Cool, so we'll probably see more of all you guys," Brendon says, looking around and making sure he remembers all the names. Don's serving their table, but he sincerely doubts he'll be able to keep track.

"Yeah, you probably will," Pete says, smirking. His expression is far too suspicious to not have meant something by that, but Brendon doesn't even bother trying to figure it out. Pete Wentz is always an enigma.

Pete comes in the next night with just a few people from his new posse, but Brendon's not serving their table. He waves at them in passing, but doesn't go out of his way to say hello.

When he gets home that night - or rather, 3 in the morning - he checks his messages on the wall panel as usual. He's surprised to find one from an IP he doesn't recognize, but he runs it through a few checks and it seems safe enough to open. It's coded, but not terribly complicated, and he knows immediately that it's from Anjela. He decodes it in a few minutes, then stares nervously at the screen. He mentally double-checks his decoding, but there's no way he did it wrong.

B. You need to move on. You're still safe in the bar, and probably in Z's apartment, but they're renewing their search for you. You could be found on the street going from one place to another. You should keep moving, within the week. Best, A.

Brendon taps nervously on the edge of the panel, and the computer makes a noise of protest. This jolts him back to the present, but doesn't make him feel any better. Anjela wants him to move. He's finally got a place where he fits in, where he knows and trusts people, and it's still not okay. He's never going to be safe. He curses loudly, then feels guilty that he might have woken Zack up. He hears no noise from his room, though, and quickly destroys the message and goes to bed.

He doesn't sleep.

******

The next day at work is miserable. Every familiar face brings a pang of regret. He never should have gotten so settled here, and now he has no idea where to go. He's got enough money to start over just about anywhere, and he's got some idea now (thanks to the computer work) how the underground bar system works, but how long will he be in a new place before he has to take off again? What if he can never settle again? Anjela's note had seemed pretty serious.

"Brendon?" Don asks, and his voice carries a note of nervousness.

"Yeah, what's up?" Brendon asks, trying to edge his usual happiness back into his voice.

"You seem really out of it, bro. You wanna go home for the night?"

He probably should, just to pack his bags. Does he have the option of keeping up with bags? He doesn't even know. He wishes he could get in touch with Anjela, but knows she's untraceable at the moment. The coding of the message had given that away. "Nah, I'm just tired. I'll be fine."

"Okay," Don says, though he's not convinced, "well you have tables."

Shit, right. Enough moping. He puts on a big fake smile and goes to tend to his customers.

"Hi, sorry for your wait. Spencer, right?" he says, recognizing the guy from Pete's new group.

Spencer nods, very business-like. "You're Brendon, right?"

He's gotten used to people knowing his name as fast as he knows theirs, but today it gets under his skin. Maybe the bar is safe, but how will he know who to trust after this? "That's me! What can I get for you?"

Spencer is so matter-of-fact with his drink order that Brendon doesn't stick around to make small talk. Zack hands him two drinks, one of which is Brendon's usual, and gives him a significant look. "Bossman says to take a break, talk to that guy."

Brendon doesn't like the sound of that, not tonight. Zack senses his hesitance, though, and leans forward to whisper, "It's cool. Me and Spencer go way back. You can trust him."

Brendon nods, and takes the drinks over. He pulls the shades off the top of his head and puts them down on the table. "You wanted to talk to me?" he asks Spencer, handing over his drink and waiting before he sits.

"Yeah, just for a few minutes, if you don't mind." Brendon sits and sips at his drink. "I'd like to offer you a job," Spencer says, getting right down to business.

Brendon works really hard not to choke on his drink. He really wasn't expecting that. "What kind of job?" he asks, trying to sound casually interested. His mind is racing. A job on a ship, that would definitely keep him moving. Zack and Spencer go way back; is that enough of a basis to take a job from him?

"Mainly organizational. I spoke with your boss a couple of nights back, and he tells me good things about your computer skills. If he's correct, we could really use you on our ship. We're a cargo ship, traveling mainly among the Inner Periphery planets. We need someone to insure the efficiency of our business, keep records, and manage our shipments."

So the position is basically a glorified secretary, Brendon translates. But still, computers. "You've spoken with my boss about this?"

Spencer nods. "He approached me about offering you this position." He sees Brendon's sad look and adds, "I don't think it was from any desire to get rid of you, merely an acknowledgment that your skills could be put to better use elsewhere. And you would of course have the opportunity return here from time to time, as we return to Earth every few months."

Months away at a time. Brendon knows that this is exactly what he needs, that some clandestine force is offering him not only his dream job (even if 'secretary' isn't exactly what he had in mind), but also the chance to get away when he needs it most. He wants to ask Spencer to give him time to think it over, but then he remembers Anjela's message, 'within the week,' and says, "I'll take it."

******

The next 24 hours pass in a blur. He's mildly embarrassed, because he remembers Spencer inviting him to have a few more drinks over the course of the night, after Brendon had been given the rest of the night off. He doesn't remember much after that, but he wakes up without hating the world, so he's grateful for that. He has to say goodbye to Zack, which sucks, but at least getting the hell away from there will keep Zack and his other friends safe.

"You'd better check in when you're on planet," Zack says, tone threatening.

Brendon ducks his head and tries not to get all emotional. He has friends here. "Even if I have to get here from Russia," he says jokingly. It's something he's noticed about all shipmen - they treat the entire planet like one location. It's baffling to Brendon, but maybe he'll understand it soon.

Zack gives him a ride to the hub where he agreed to meet Spencer. Brendon spends five minutes clinging to Zack and trying to say goodbye, and he only stops because Spencer is clearly getting impatient. "Bye," he says again over his shoulder, and Zack only rolls his eyes and waves.

Brendon tries to contain his excitement as they board the ship. He's been on exactly one other ship before, one that they brought in when he was at the Academy to show the students one of the futures they might be able to look forward to. Of course, he knows now it was all a lie, but at the time he'd thought it was the coolest thing ever. There had been computers all over the place, running different parts of the ship. He wasn't allowed to touch any of them, of course, but knowing the power that was held there was enough to make him itch for it. He'd wanted to work on a ship ever since.

This ship, though. It's actually up-to-date, which puts it leagues ahead of the ship that Brendon once saw as a young student. He wants to touch everything all at once, and he keeps commenting to Spencer about how fascinating it all is. While he's trying to explain to Spencer that he'd only ever heard about panels being this small, someone comes on deck and says, "Is this our new hire?"

Brendon turns toward the voice, and sees a very skinny man with his hands clasped tight behind his back. Brendon smiles brightly and offers his hand. "That's me! Brendon Urie."

The guy gives him a measuring look before nodding curtly and taking his hand, up-down, then releasing it. "Ryan Ross," he says. He doesn't smile.

Brendon feels like squirming, suddenly uncomfortable. He doesn't like it, so he turns back to the console and starts pressing buttons.

Spencer cuts in quickly. "I don't know if you should--"

But too late, Brendon's already turned on three screens and is scanning statistics. "Did you know that your engine's been running at only 78% of its potential capacity? And you could handle longer distances if you maintained a slower speed during travel."

"The captain is more of a 'get things done as fast as possible' kind of guy," Ryan says, somehow managing to convey derision despite a lack of inflection.

"Wow, they weren't wrong about you," Spencer says with just a hint of wonder, ignoring Ryan's scowl. "You really know what you're doing."

Brendon shrugs it off. "I'm no mechanic, but I know what a computer tells me."

He turns to offer Spencer a smile for the compliment, but then Spencer smiles back, and Brendon's next statement gets caught somewhere low in his throat. He has a moment where he feels completely at a loss - Spencer is gorgeous - and then a switch catches his eye across the deck and he goes over to find out what it does.

He's never been up before, he hears suddenly from Spencer. His years at Academy are the only reason he doesn't whip his head around immediately, but he knows the difference between a person's real voice and their thought voice. A thought voice sounds the same as how someone hears their own voice, just slightly different from how others hear them. He waits to hear Ryan's reply, but none comes. Only Spencer can do it, then.

He shakes it all off mentally, reminding himself that responding now would be a bad idea, and goes back to his exploration, already thinking of ways to bring it up again the moment he has Spencer alone.

******

That night, after a very awkward dinner with Ryan and Spencer in which Brendon tried not to ask too many questions, Spencer shows Brendon to his quarters.

"Your room is connected to mine," Spencer explains, indicating the door to the left. "The bathroom is between my room and Ryan's, and then there's Jon's room, and the kitchen, which is next door to you."

"Cool," Brendon says, and he means it. It's like a little donut of coworkers. He just hopes he doesn't get on their nerves. He didn't have a lot of friends at the Academy, and Zack had seemed more tolerant than your average roommate.

"And obviously the common area is for all of us, too. Just try to keep the noise level down if anyone's asleep."

Brendon nods. "So how many people are on this ship? I mean, it can't just be the four of us, unless one of you is secretly the captain." He says it with a smile, but he's been thinking all day that there's something big they're hiding from him. He won't allow himself to check their thoughts; it's too soon, and even if it's safe, he'll still feel guilty for doing it.

"There are a total of eight people on this ship, now that you're here. The four of us and the four men that work upstairs, including the captain."

"A little one-sided gender-wise, don't you think?" Brendon smirks, but Spencer continues as if he didn't hear.

"You will probably only meet one of these men in your time here, possibly two if you hang out with Jon long enough."

"What, really? Does the captain keep them locked in his quarters or something?"

"It is highly unlikely that you will ever meet the captain," Spencer says with a sigh, as if he knows what's coming.

"I... what? I have to trust some dude to man a ship, and I'm not allowed to meet him? What if something goes wrong with the computers? I'm just supposed to sit at the bottom of the payroll and wait for you to report up?"

"I'm sorry, Brendon. That's just the way he operates."

Brendon sighs, resigned. He's not surprised that, for his position at the bottom of the payroll, he lacks some privileges. He didn't expect to be given everyone's names, but to not even know what his captain looks like? That seems absurd.

"In fact..."

Brendon winces but stays silent. He's had this job for a few hours and already he's complaining. He needs to just deal with it.

"There are some other rules I should lay down now," Spencer adds, his tone nothing but business, but his face showing that he hates to be the bad guy.

"Lay 'em on me," Brendon says, throwing his arms up in defeat. He smiles a bit at Spencer's wary look, because he does actually like Spencer.

"You have free reign of this floor and the deck. You can go down to the lower level, too, but it is preferred that you only go down for business purposes." He grimaces, as if he hates this next part. "And unfortunately, the upper deck is forbidden. Chances are you'll never even find out how to get there, but even if you do, I'm afraid we can't allow it."

Brendon blinks at him in shock. "And what happens if I do it anyway? What if it's an accident?"

Spencer huffs a laugh. "I can assure you that you won't stumble upon it while you're sleepwalking. And if you do it on purpose, well," his eyes flick away from Brendon's, "you'll be summarily dismissed," a pause, "if you're lucky."

Brendon swallows. He hasn't known Spencer long, but he doesn't take him to be much for dramatics, which means the weight of those words is genuine.

"Understood?"

Brendon blinks back his surprise, trying to regain composure. He nods, only sounding slightly breathless when he says, "Yeah, understood."

"Good," Spencer says, looking relieved. Brendon thinks again of the message he overheard in the cargo bay, but before he can come up with a plan of action, Spencer is backing out of his room. "Well, I'll leave you alone for the night. We'll work out the details of your job tomorrow before we lift off."

"Oh, um. Okay." Brendon nods. He'd kind of been hoping he could hang out with Spencer for a while, but now he realizes how stupid that sounds.

"Do you have any more questions?"

Brendon notices the sleek panel in the wall next to his bed. "How much am I allowed to do with my computer?" He regrets his word choice immediately, thinking that it sounds like he's trying to get away with something.

Spencer shrugs and smiles slightly. "Whatever you want, dude. The captain has a few rules, but he's not a tyrant."

"Oh, right," Brendon says, and now he feels like a jerk.

"Well, if you have any more questions, Ryan will be in his room for a little while. I have a few more errands on planet to get done."

Brendon nods, looking around his room, and when he turns to say 'thank you,' Spencer is already gone.

******

Half an hour later, Brendon is bored. Despite Spencer's assurances, Brendon doesn't want to mess with his panel before he knows for sure that he can do whatever. Plus, they're still on planet, close to his friends. He doesn't feel safe just yet.

He thinks about going exploring in the ship, but Spencer's serious warning echoes in his head, and he decides that's another bad idea. He's laying on the couch in the common area, counting the ceiling tiles, when he hears a cough from Ryan's room. He hadn't realized Ryan was already in his room.

After taking a few minutes to talk himself into it, Brendon goes to knock on Ryan's door. He's still not sure it's a good idea, as Ryan doesn't seem particularly thrilled to have him on the ship, but if they're going to be working with each other for years, better to deal with it now.

"Come in," Ryan says, and he doesn't look up when Brendon opens the door. He's at his desk, bent over a notebook. Brendon's not sure what to make of it at first, because he hardly ever sees people write anymore. He decides it would be rude to start talking while Ryan's obviously busy, so he stands in the doorway trying not to feel awkward while he waits.

Ryan finally puts his pen down and blinks up at Brendon as if just noticing he was there. "What's up?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt," Brendon says softly.

Ryan shakes his head and shuts the notebook. "It's fine, I need to get some work done anyway." He stands and heads out into the common area with Brendon, shutting his door behind them. "Was there something you wanted?"

"Oh, uh. Well, I was wondering about Jon? Spencer mentioned him a few times. I was wondering when I would get to meet him."

Ryan gives Brendon a searching look, and Brendon feels instantly unsettled. "He won't be back until tomorrow afternoon. He's got family around here that he's visiting while we're on planet. Why?"

Brendon clears his throat, wishing he knew why Ryan disliked him so much. "I dunno, I just wanted to meet him. We're gonna be working together for a while now, so we might as well get to know each other, right?" He realizes as he says it that it very much applies to his feelings about Ryan, but that seems a lost cause right now.

Ryan nods. "Jon gets along with everybody. I'm sure you won't have any trouble."

Not like right now, Brendon thinks bitterly as Ryan moves off into the kitchen. He lets him go and flops back onto the couch. What number did he leave off on with the ceiling tiles?

"You wanna help me down on the cargo deck?" Ryan asks, breaking Brendon out of his counting process.

"Sure," Brendon says, grateful both for something to do and for another chance to get on Ryan's good side. "What can I do?"

It turns out that Ryan is dreadfully bad with computers, and they spend a good while on the lower deck's panels just trying to sort out the mess of his filing. Brendon is attempting to do his half of the files as slowly as he can stand, because he doesn't want to make Ryan feel bad, but it's really quite easy, if tedious.

"Fuck," Ryan murmurs. "I have no idea what that fucking means."

Brendon heads over, trying to be helpful. "What's it say?"

Ryan moves away from his panel, and Brendon recognizes a coded seal on this set of files. "Oh, it's coded. It just needs to be translated and the key saved for future reference." Brendon goes through a few basic decryption methods, finding success pretty quickly. "There. It's still password-protected, so only you and the people that can access your account can see it, but you won't have to figure out the shipping details all over again next time."

Ryan blinks at him in awe. "How did you do that?"

"Um," Brendon says, wishing he hadn't done that. "It's just a matter of decryption?"

He half-expects Ryan to reprimand him and reveal that he's from the Academy and was just waiting for the proof to catch him, but what he doesn't expect at all is the response he gets. Ryan uncrosses his arms and says, "That's awesome. I've got some others like that; usually we have to get Max to figure out some way around it."

Brendon wants to ask who Max is, but Ryan's leaning into his space to bring up some other coded files, and Brendon gets caught up in the feeling of someone standing so close. He really hates himself for it, but he's so tactile that he desperately misses contact. Back at the Academy, he'd had a few relationships that were mainly just for fun. It had been nice to have someone that he didn't really have to explain to when he accidentally said something with his mind in the middle of things, but they never wanted anything real, and he'd always felt lonely in the end.

"Brendon?" Ryan says, and Brendon feels his face heat up. Ryan smirks at him, but it seems a friendly gesture. "You totally left me for a minute there."

Brendon stares at the slight smile on Ryan's face and automatically smiles back. "Sorry, I zoned out. Won't happen again."

Ryan rolls his eyes, but the smile remains. "I'm not so sure about that, but. Here, do you think you could work your magic on these files, too?"

The phrase 'work your magic' brings back thoughts of his friends at the bar, but he pushes down the memory and gets to work. If he does a good enough job, maybe he'll win over all the guys on the ship and this will be almost like the job he'd always hoped for.

******

Meeting Jon turns out to be almost as easy as Ryan hinted it would be. Spencer and Jon walk into their living area, talking about some sports thing that Brendon doesn't follow.

Spencer sees Brendon first, and says, "Oh, good, you're here. I need to show you what we need you to do around here. Jon, this is Brendon."

Jon is bent over his bag, looking for something. "Nice to meet you," he says without looking up. He stands up suddenly, pulling a bottle out of the bag with a look of satisfaction.

Brendon smiles and steps forward to offer his hand, but then Jon looks up at him and makes a surprised noise and simultaneously drops the bottle. Luckily, it hits the soft floor and rolls away instead of breaking, but it's enough to make Brendon jump back.

"Fuck, sorry about that. I, uh, my fingers must still be greasy from my mom's home cooking. Um, don't tell her I said that." He smiles softly, and it warms something in Brendon's chest. "Starting over: Hey, Brendon, nice to meet you."

Brendon takes Jon's hand and shakes it comfortably. "Nice to meet you too, Jon."

"So you're here to fix all our computer troubles?" Spencer looks like he's about to protest, but Jon continues. "We really have no idea what we're doing. Mostly we're only good for deliveries, and then we spend all our free time cleaning up our filing messes."

Spencer crosses his arms, disgruntled that Jon had given that much away. At least, that's what Brendon assumes when he mumbles, "We didn't just hire you to clean up our messes."

"I don't mind," Brendon says, and he means it. "I helped Ryan sort through some stuff last night."

Spencer looks surprised. "You did? Ryan, is that true?"

Brendon looks around and sure enough, Ryan is coming out of his room. He repeats his previous statement in his head to make sure he didn't say anything Ryan might take offense to.

"Yeah, he's really good. He knows how to decode the locked files and save them," he says, nodding in thanks to Brendon. "Hey, Jon," he adds, handing Jon the bottle that he had dropped.

"Thanks, man," Jon says, but Spencer's not done.

"You mean you two are getting along now?"

Brendon blinks in surprise while Ryan gives Spencer a scathing look. Spencer doesn't look too happy either.

"What are you--" Brendon starts to ask, but Jon cuts him off.

"I'll just show Brendon around downstairs."

Brendon looks from Jon to Spencer and Ryan and back again, confused. Jon leaves his bag on the floor and guides Brendon toward the elevator, not offering any more information.

"What's going on?" Brendon asks once the doors slide shut.

Jon sighs. "Ryan and Spencer bicker sometimes. It's usually best just to walk away and leave them to it. They've been friends forever, it's pretty much a given that they'll get over it, whatever it is."

"But--I don't understand what just happened."

"Oh, right." Jon chuckles to himself. "Ryan used to use your bedroom as, like, his 'thinking space' or something. We always gave him a hard time about it, but it didn't really matter to us. Anyway, he had to give it up so we could make room for our new hire."

"Oh. Is that why he didn't like me when he met me?"

Jon makes a sympathetic face. "Probably. Ryan's pretty stubborn. You seem to have won him over, though."

Brendon's not so sure, but at least he's made progress. "So have you always lived in Chicago?" he asks.

Jon's face lights up, and before Brendon knows it he's laughing at one of Jon's stories from home. Things might not be perfect here, but he thinks he's going to enjoy it.

******

For the first few weeks, Brendon mostly just organizes their file system and any recent records, and also fixes any problems he discovers along the way. It's incredibly easy, and once he's fixed enough to satisfy Spencer, he has the rest of the day to do whatever he wants. Any time they make a stop for deliveries, Brendon checks to make sure their shipment is correct and updates their records, and then he stays on board all day. He's allowed to go out, of course, but for this first little bit, he thinks it's safer to stay. At night, after the work is done, they all go out as a group to a bar. It doesn't take Brendon long to recognize that they're all underground bars, just like the Shady Name, and that makes him feel safer.

Brendon hadn't realized at first that Pete's caravan of ships included the one he was hired onto, but when Pete accosts him at their first stop, it all seems to fall into place. There are dozens of people that he recognizes from their stops at the Shady Name, except now he's apparently going to see them at every stop.

After just a few weeks, Brendon starts to feel like he really knows all the people from their group. Even though he barely drinks, most of the others do, and their routine stops at bars lead to long, focused chats with Brendon, who is far too interested to move along. On this particular stop, though, Brendon is hanging out with Spencer, who says he doesn't want anything to drink.

"I don't really want anything either. Do you wanna just go back to the ship?"

Spencer looks surprised at his offer, but takes him up on it. Brendon's mind is racing on the way there, remembering his failed attempt to get Spencer to use his ability.

It had only lasted about ten minutes, but Brendon still feels embarrassed when he remembers it. He and Spencer had been alone in the common area, and Brendon had opened his mind completely. He had been warned by the Academy never to do this, ever, but he didn't necessarily trust everything he'd been taught at the Academy, not anymore. He concentrated hard on Spencer's name, not broadcasting it, just thinking it very pointedly. Spencer hadn't even glanced up. Briefly, Brendon considered sending it, which would work on anyone, telepath or not, but then Spencer had shifted toward him and said, "What?" Brendon had blinked at him, convinced that Spencer really did hear Brendon's thoughts, but Spencer went on. "You've been sitting there, cutting your eyes at me, for the last five minutes."

Brendon blanches at the memory. He had mumbled an apology and that it was nothing, and tried not to look obvious when he went back to his room to work on his computer. He'd thought at the time that maybe it wasn't a good idea to mention it to Spencer, but Spencer has been nothing but nice to him since he joined the crew, and Zack trusts him. So Brendon spends most of their walk back to the ship thinking of a new way to ask Spencer about his ability.

His brainstorming is cut off, however, when they reach the ship. The side door into the cargo deck is wide open. Spencer freezes and stares at it, and then they share a look before quietly creeping up to it. The lights are all on inside, which furthers Brendon's suspicions that something isn't right. Spencer points Brendon in one direction and walks off the other way, but Brendon has no idea what he's looking for. A person? How in the hell would anyone be able to carry any of these boxes out? They wouldn't fit through the side door, and the hatch certainly isn't open to get them out. Brendon wonders, not for the first time, what it is that they deliver, but it's one of those things that Spencer says he doesn't need to know.

After a minute or so of creeping quietly around boxes, Brendon gives it up. Whoever broke in must have gotten away before they got there. He turns to walk back to the center of the deck when he hears, loud and clear, Brendon, look out! It's such a crisp thought in his head that he ducks without stopping to think, and the guy he didn't see trips and falls on top of him.

Spencer is there in a flash, pulling the guy up and holding his hands behind his back. "Dude, this is like the third time we've caught you on here. There are better places to sleep, okay? We're never gonna lift off with you still on board. And if you're trying to steal anything, you know that's impossible."

"Wait, you know this guy?" Brendon asks, bewildered. Spencer had just thought-spoke at him! Brendon wouldn't have any trouble bringing it up now.

The guy glares at Brendon, mumbling under his breath, but not saying anything directly to either of them.

"Sort of. He's broken in before. Come on," he says to the guy, pushing him toward the door. "If we catch you on here again, we're calling someone, okay? If you had actually managed to hit my friend on the head, you'd already be locked up."

The guy mumbles some more, and Brendon thinks he hears "never called anyone yet," but he doesn't respond. Clearly Spencer's got it under control. Spencer reprimands him a few more times on the way out, and makes sure the door is secure when he returns.

"So," Brendon says, smiling and bouncing slightly.

"What?" Spencer says, wearily. "He didn't hurt you, did he? I know he fell on you, but I kind of assumed you were alright."

"Come on, Spence. I'm fine. You know what I'm talking about."

Spencer raises his eyebrows, expression clearly saying No, I don't.

Brendon rolls his eyes. "You and I both know that we were the only two people in here that heard you warn me."

Spencer takes only a second to wipe the surprise off his face, but Brendon catches it anyway. "The guy's homeless, and he may not be all there, but I'm pretty sure he can hear, Brendon."

"Yeah, exactly," Brendon says, narrowing his eyes. Spencer is being deliberately obtuse, and all Brendon's asking for is some honesty.

"Look, I don't have time for whatever game you're trying to play. I'm going to bed."

Brendon doesn't give up that easy, though. He follows Spencer into the elevator, saying, "It's like 9 o'clock ship-time. Am I really supposed to believe you're suddenly going to bed 3 hours earlier than usual?" Spencer ignores him. "Look, I know you can do it, and you know you can do it, I just want you to tell me."

Spencer's mouth goes into a tight line, and he says, matter-of-fact, "Whatever you h--whatever you think you heard, you're just imagining things."

Spencer steps off the elevator and Brendon suddenly recognizes the slight desperation in Spencer's tone. He realizes that if their positions were flipped, and Spencer were trying to get him to admit to his ability, he would do whatever it took to change the subject. He feels like a jackass then, and just as Spencer heads for his bedroom door, Brendon says, Spence. I can do it, too.

Spencer pauses with his hand on the door handle. He turns slowly to stare Brendon in the face. "Did you just--?"

Yes, Brendon says, expression blank. Spencer stares hard at his mouth, which hasn't moved. Ever since I was a kid. He realizes that's kind of misleading, but it's still true, so he can send it without breaking his brain or whatever. Brendon's still not sure what would happen to a person if they tried to lie in their own head, but he's heard negative things often enough to know better than to try it.

"Really?" he asks, and the tension in his shoulders lessens considerably. "Do you know how it works?"

Brendon shrugs. "Yeah, I guess. I can, like, control it and stuff." He had been assuming since he overheard Spencer's first outburst that Spencer didn't have training, but now he's starting to wonder if Spencer's actually really good, better than Brendon, and Brendon was just being presumptuous.

"Could you teach me?" Spencer asks, fidgeting slightly.

Oh, or maybe he was right. "What do you mean?" Brendon asks cautiously. "I mean, you sent that thought to me fine just now."

Spencer's face is flushed, but he maintains his composure as he explains, "I've never been able to do it on purpose with anyone but Ryan. The other times, though luckily they haven't happened a lot, have just been because I'm all worked up."

Brendon wonders how often Spencer would be yelling for someone to duck, but then he remembers his own experiences at the Academy, babbling something absurd in his head while in someone else's bed, and he realizes Spencer probably had the same problems. He doesn't dare carry that line of thought further, though.

"So, wait. You've only... I mean, you can send your thoughts out. But you can't hear anything else?" He bites his lip as the question leaves his mouth. There was probably a more subtle way to ask that.

"What do you mean?" Spencer asks, confused. "I heard your message when you sent it."

"Right, yeah. Nevermind. I don't know if I'll be the best teacher, but yeah, I can try."

Spencer looks so grateful that Brendon can't even have second thoughts. Spencer is his best friend on the ship, and Brendon can trust him. At least, that's what Brendon tells himself every night when he's woken up by nightmares of being dragged away in the night by one of the nameless faces of his early Academy teachers.

******

Brendon tries not to be nervous on the day of Spencer's first lesson. He's no teacher, but Spencer understands that already. He should, anyway; Brendon can't stop reminding him. He wishes he could remember more of his first few years at the Academy, if only to approach Spencer's ability carefully. Despite all his misgivings about his time there, he'd always thought his teachers were kind enough when they were teaching him. He can only hope that Spencer won't get frustrated with him.

Spencer waits until Ryan goes into his room for the night before coming into Brendon's room for their lesson. Brendon supposes that's the answer to his question of whether Spencer told Ryan.

The first thing Brendon does is ask Spencer to have a seat. Spencer looks at the spot next to Brendon on the bed, but ultimately chooses to sit over at Brendon's desk. "So how is this gonna work?" Spencer asks, voice different from how Brendon's used to hearing it.

"Well, probably a good place to start is for you to tell me about your ability. When have you used it?"

Spencer bites his lip. "This is just between us, right?"

"Of course."

Spencer blushes. "Do you need, like, the details?"

Brendon thinks to himself, I could just read your mind, and says, "How about I tell you about me to start us off?"

Spencer composes himself suddenly, looking more like the Spencer Brendon has known all this time. Still, Brendon can sense that he's relieved. "If that's what you prefer," he says.

Brendon has a sudden moment of indecision. Spencer is his friend, his best friend, but Brendon needs to be careful with who he trusts. Anjela's words come back to him in a rush. Is he being too trusting? His secret is safe in his own head, but once Spencer knows it, it can be read at any time.

"I..." He winces, trying to find the words that don't sound rude, but still get his point across. "I need to know that I can trust you. It's not that I don't, it's that... I've been warned against being too trusting. I have a way to know for sure, but I'm not going to do it without your consent."

Spencer looks uneasy. "What are you talking about?"

"I can, uh..." He pitches his voice lower. "I can read your mind." Spencer's eyes widen and he sits back in his chair. Brendon waves his hands and quickly adds, "I promise I won't do it if you don't want me to. But uh, well, it's just a precaution I have to take. With everyone."

Spencer is still staring at him. "You can read minds." Brendon nods, trying to contain the nervous energy threatening to burst out at any second. While Spencer takes the time to process this new concept, Brendon mentally berates himself. If Spencer truly wasn't to be trusted, it'd be too late to make a difference. He'd ruined it by admitting to his ability, and after all, Spencer having an ability could simply mean that he was trained at a different school. But still, it's Spencer. And it's too late now to take it back, so he pulls himself back into the moment.

A nervous look passes over Spencer's expression. "Have you ever--"

"No," Brendon says firmly and instantly. "It's a violation of privacy."

"Right, okay. Uh... How much will you hear if I let you read my mind?" He maintains a composed tone, but he won't look Brendon in the eye.

"Not a lot," Brendon promises. "I just... If you were planning to... betray me," he says, feeling ridiculous, "it'd be obvious in your head even if you were thinking 'I AM TRUSTWORTHY' as loud as you could."

Spencer cracks a smile at that, looking interested. "Really?"

"Yeah," Brendon says, sharing Spencer's interest. "The mind is really fascinating. I would love to do studies, but... uh. I don't really know how that works."

Brendon gives Spencer another minute, as he is obviously lost in thought, and then he seems to come back to himself. "Alright," he says. "You can do it. I guess."

Brendon nods, even though he's honestly surprised. Spencer is such a private person; he's obviously pretty desperate for Brendon's help. "Okay, well this will be quick and painless. Just... focus on why you want to learn from me, or just... what you think of me? Something like that. That'll make it easier."

Panic flits across Spencer's expression, and Brendon hurries to calm him down. "You seriously don't have to do this if you don't want," he reminds Spencer.

Spencer rolls his eyes, though Brendon doesn't know if it's directed at him or Spencer himself. "It's okay man, just do it already."

"Okay," he says, but he gives Spencer a few seconds before he breaks down that block and filters in Spencer's thoughts. It's weird, after months of tuning thoughts out, to let them flow into his consciousness again. It's nice; soothing.

I need to learn how to control my ability. To keep me safe--protect--I am trustworthy and I just need to learn how to control--

Brendon blocks out the thoughts immediately, feeling guilty. Of course Spencer is trustworthy, and now he's gone and violated his 'no mind reading' promise. "Okay," he says softly. Spencer eyes slide open, and he looks at Brendon expectantly. "You passed," he jokes, laughing self-deprecatingly. "I'm sorry for making you do that."

Spencer shrugs it off. He leans forward in Brendon's chair, looking interested. "So what's the big secret?"

Brendon laughs straight out at that, because a minute ago that would have made him super suspicious, but now he has proof that he can trust Spencer. It's such a relief. "I guess you've earned this. I trained at this--school. For people with abilities. When I was little, I started hearing people's thoughts. Weird, right? So they shipped me off to a special school, and I was there for... 9 years? So. Yeah." He laughs at Spencer's expression, a mixture of surprise and awe.

"That explains a lot. Is that why you're such a computer genius? Because you had really smart teachers?"

"Oh, uh. Well, I only had teachers for the stuff about my telepathy. Everything else was self-taught."

"Oh," Spencer chuckles. "Wow. I didn't mean to imply that you couldn't be, like, a genius all on your own."

Brendon snorts. "Between you and me, I'm pretty sure the telepathy's a major factor. It's like I can talk to computers." He bites his lip. "Is that weird?"

Spencer smiles at him. "Of course it's weird. But I think it's great." He fidgets for a moment. "So do you think you can help me figure out my ability?"

"Yeah, I think so. I just need you to trust me too, or we're never going to get anywhere. I can do the whole message thing," he says, gesturing between them. "I'm pretty sure it works the same way; it's still thought, so it's impossible to lie."

"Sure, why not?"

Brendon smiles, glad that Spencer's working with him. I promise not to tell anyone anything you share with me during these lessons, and to help you as much as I can.

Spencer nods, appearing satisfied. "Do you have, like, two abilities? The message thing and mind reading?"

Brendon considers for a moment. "I don't think so. I think we have the same ability. Mine was just... unavoidable, when I was younger. You had it easy," he says mockingly.

Spencer looks pensive. "I was lucky to have Ryan," he mumbles. Brendon feels a pang at that, but he quickly pushes down the feeling.

"It was weird being at school. I didn't really hang out with a lot of people, but it was understood that everyone had an ability. I guess that made it a little less awkward when I, heh," he runs a hand over the back of his neck, "well, let's just say during hookups, I didn't always have control."

Brendon doesn't look up at Spencer, but he can hear him shift in his chair, doubling his suspicions that Spencer has had similar problems.

"I was fortunate, though, because I got really good at controlling it. If my teachers are to be believed, most kids in school never get the level of control that I had. I think I scared them because of it," he admits, biting his lip.

"So, do you think if I can get the hang of this, I might be able to read minds too?"

Brendon can't believe that's the only thing Spencer took away from all that. "Yeah, maybe. But it's seriously not as great as you'd think. If you do figure out how to hear thoughts but then can't block them out, you can't even imagine how bad the headaches are."

"You know how to block them, right?" Spencer asks, actually looking concerned. It makes Brendon feel bad for judging his interest in mind reading.

"Yeah, I haven't had the headaches since before the... school."

"It felt really weird when you were in my head. Like, I could tell something was different. Is that normal?"

Brendon blinks at him. "I know exactly what you mean," he says, remembering how he'd hated when his teachers flitted through his thoughts. "I didn't know it was the same for you, but yeah, I would be able to tell if someone was trying to get inside my head."

Spencer looks reassured at that. "So I'll be able to tell if someone I don't know is reading my mind?"

"Hopefully I'll be able to teach you how to make it so that no one can read your mind unless you let them, but yeah, you'll be able to tell."

Spencer looks distant for a moment, then he nods. "The first time it happened was when I was at the park down by my house."

Brendon leans forward and pays attention as Spencer recounts his story. His pulse is still pounding, but this time more from excitement at having someone to trust than anxiety that his secret will be discovered. By the time Brendon goes to bed, he's already decided to teach Spencer everything he can.

******

Brendon has never felt more sick in his life.

"I think I'm dying," he moans, but it burns his throat and comes out more of a distressed mumble than anything else.

"It's typical for your first time on new planets," Ryan says sympathetically, handing over a mug filled with some warm beverage. Brendon sniffs it, and Ryan rolls his eyes. "It's tea, just drink it."

Brendon just wants to go back to sleep, but he hesitantly takes a sip. It burns going down, but then the pain in his throat seems to dull. It tastes awful, though.

"You should've seen Spencer the first time we went to DW12," Ryan says, smirking. "I thought I was never gonna hear the end of it. 'I'm dying Ryan, why can't you make it stop, what are you going to do when I die and leave you alone on this ship?'"

Spencer comes out of the kitchen with a bowl that he sets on the table in front of Brendon. "I heard that," he says, shoving Ryan over so that they can share the armchair. "And if I recall it was you that got so sick you wanted to be taken back to Earth to die peacefully."

Ryan punches Spencer on the shoulder while he laughs, and Brendon wishes they would stop talking and go be best friends somewhere else. He's got a headache and he can't breathe; he's not exactly in the mood for their flirtation or whatever-the-fuck.

"Hey," Spencer says, focusing on Brendon now. "I made you soup; it should help with the headache. My mom taught me how to make it," he says, looking proud.

Brendon tries to mumble something about Spencer's mother, but all that comes out is one long, indistinguishable sound. He shifts and sits up on the couch, fighting with dizziness for a second.

"Here," Spencer says, moving forward and holding the spoon up toward Brendon's face. Brendon glares at him long and hard until Spencer drops the eager look and takes on a bitchier one.

"I can do it," Brendon says, reaching for the spoon.

Spencer rolls his eyes. "Well excuse me for trying to be nice."

"He's just pissed because he can't monopolize the conversation for once," Ryan teases. Brendon really hates Ryan right now.

The soup does help, and it tastes a hell of a lot better than Ryan's magic tea, so Brendon eats it eagerly. He murmurs a thank you to Spencer when he's finished, and Spencer nods, taking the bowl away.

Ryan stands to leave too, but pauses to hand Brendon the mug of tea again. "You should finish it. It'll help you sleep," he says quietly, and as he walks back to his room, his fingers brush across the back of Brendon's neck.

Brendon does finish the tea, finding it easier now to ignore the taste. He feels warm inside, different from the fever, and sure enough, he slips right off into sleep.

******

When Brendon startles awake several hours later, he blinks into the darkness and wonders what woke him up.

"Sorry," Jon whispers from just behind the couch, and Brendon yelps in quite an undignified manner. "Um, and sorry for that? I was trying to get to my room without turning on the light so that I wouldn't wake you, but obviously that didn't work out."

"It's okay," Brendon assures him, willing his heart to stop racing. He runs a hand through his hair and asks, "What time is it?"

"Around 1? 1:30? I was hanging with Tom and we kind of lost track of time, I guess. How are you feeling?"

Brendon thinks about it, and he certainly feels less like he's dying. "Better, I think. But that doesn't give you permission to turn on the fluorescents," he warns.

Jon chuckles and nudges Brendon's legs up so that he can sit on the couch, but he doesn't complain when Brendon settles his legs on his lap. "Do you want to watch something?" Jon murmurs, rubbing Brendon's ankle soothingly.

Brendon hums and stretches, enjoying the attention. "Sure," he says, sitting up to use the controls in the couch. "What did you have in mind?"

The panel springs to life in the wall across from them, and Brendon hurries to turn the brightness down before it can give him a headache. When Jon doesn't respond, Brendon glances over at him. Jon is bathed in the dim light from the panel and watches Brendon with a small, sweet smile. "What?" Brendon asks, automatically smiling back.

"Nothing," Jon says, shaking his head but still smiling. He returns his gaze to the panel. "We can watch whatever you want."

Brendon settles on a comedy that seems promising, and it's great for the first half hour until he starts laughing and then can't stop coughing. Jon looks concerned and then disappears into the kitchen. He comes back with a glass of water that Brendon takes gratefully, gulping it down.

"I kind of know how to make Ryan's weird tea, if you want," Jon offers when Brendon manages to stop coughing.

"No," Brendon insists, not wanting to go back to sleep yet. "I'm fine now." He sits up fully on the couch, finding it easier to breathe that way. Jon doesn't look convinced, but Brendon cuddles up to him on the couch and focuses on the screen.

Jon combines a sigh and a laugh, draping his arm around Brendon and pulling him in closer. Brendon smiles and settles in comfortably, hoping that his cough won't return.

An hour or two later, Brendon finds his eyes slipping shut again. He feels ridiculous, as he slept all day, but he knows Jon hasn't slept at all. "I think I'm falling asleep on you," he says, noting how literal that statement is. As if to prove it, he suddenly yawns into Jon's shoulder, unable to help it.

"I don't mind," Jon says, but then he mimics Brendon's yawn. Brendon smiles at that, and Jon rolls his eyes. "Fine, but I'm making sure you actually make it to your bed safely first."

Brendon feels perfectly fine when he stands up, not dizzy at all, but he doesn't complain when Jon wraps an arm around him to steady him. As he collapses onto his bed - much more comfortable than the couch, what was he thinking? - he shifts around to squint toward where he thinks Jon is in the dark. "Jon?"

"Yeah?" Jon whispers in reply. Brendon has a sudden thought to ask Jon to sleep over, but quickly talks himself out of it.

"Thanks," he simply says.

"No problem, man," Jon says easily, touching Brendon's hand briefly before walking back out into the common area, closing Brendon's door behind him.

Brendon blinks up at the ceiling and doesn't have time to worry about his sudden anxiety before he falls asleep.

******

After Brendon recovers from what Ryan and Spencer call his first "PTD" (Planetarily Transmitted Disease), he is determined to get more involved with the goings-on of the ship. When he finishes his tasks for the day, he heads down to the cargo deck to help with some of the other work. It's much more enjoyable than sitting around reading or watching mindless things on his panel all day, and it keeps him from trying to explore aspects of the computer system that he's pretty sure would be forbidden to him if anyone realized he could get to them.

He's helping Ryan sort through color-coded boxes and rambling about how he has no idea what they transport on this ship when he sees Max for the first time on board. He just stares in surprise when Max walks up to them, because he knew there were four unnamed dudes working upstairs, but he didn't realize they'd be people he knew from their stops. He just assumed that they were super-secretive and always remained on board when the ship was on planet.

"Brendon," Max says, skipping the pleasantries and ignoring Brendon's look of bewilderment. "Somehow the captain has been locked out of some of the information in our database. Do you think you could fix that?"

"I... maybe? I can try, at least."

Max nods and moves off, and Brendon has only a moment to think excitedly that he'll get to see who the captain is before Max stops at one of the wall panels and enters in some information. Brendon tries not to feel disappointed. Max points out where the files are, saying, "I'm not sure how this happened, but I suspect that Tom has something to do with it, as he's the one that alerted me to the problem." He sighs. "If you can just make this set of files public to my account, that would suffice. Just let Spencer know if you don't think it's possible."

Brendon nods, maintaining a professional look, and moves toward the panel. Max approaches Spencer and they both speak in very official tones, so Brendon tunes them out. He stares at the screen for several long moments, wrapping his head around what he's about to do. He's basically been asked to hack into the file system, which is simultaneously thrilling and intimidating. He also notes that Tom is also apparently on the ship, and then he remembers suddenly that Jon had mentioned hanging out with him even when they weren't on planet. He feels stupid for missing that, even if he had been sick at the time, so with that forlorn thought, he begins to mess with the infrastructure of the system.

He is hard at work trying to break through another firewall when he distantly hears, "Brendon?"

The address barely registers, though, and he concentrates on the line of code as he enters it. He runs the algorithm again, and--nothing happens. Again. "Come on," he mumbles, already thinking about the changes needed for his next attempt, when a hand on his shoulder jolts him out of the thought.

"Brendon," Spencer says, exasperated. "You've been working on this for nearly four hours."

Brendon struggles to get out of his headspace, and as he does, he realizes that his legs are incredibly stiff. He looks at Spencer, contacts shifting as he looks away from the panel, and says, "Oh."

"Come on, let's go get something to eat," Spencer says, guiding Brendon toward the elevator.

"I'm so close to figuring it out," Brendon says, unable to stop thinking about the code as he last left it. Maybe if he tweaked the recursive part to--

"Dude," Spencer says firmly. "You need to take a break, seriously. You're looking a little crazy."

"But I know I can do it," Brendon insists.

"I'm sure you can," Spencer says, and Brendon can't help but smile at that. "But it will still be locked tomorrow, and you can work on it some more then."

"But Max said--"

"I'm willing to bet that Max didn't tell you this had to be done today."

"Well, not exactly, I guess..."

Ryan and Jon are already sitting at the table in the kitchen when they walk in. "You look terrible," Ryan says, matter-of-fact.

"Thanks," Brendon mumbles, rubbing at his temples. Maybe Spencer's right. It's tough to pull himself out of that frame of mind, though, and he doesn't know how to explain that to them.

He eats his dinner in silence, letting their conversation wash over him. His headache starts to subside, and when Jon finishes his dinner, he stands behind Brendon and massages his shoulders.

"How come you never do that for me?" Spencer asks with a smirk.

"You don't work that hard," Ryan answers before Jon can respond.

Spencer opens his mouth to protest, and at the same time, Brendon shudders pleasantly as Jon manages to find the perfect spot.

"Yes?" Ryan prompts Spencer when he doesn't say anything for a moment or two. Brendon looks up, curious, and Spencer is watching him.

"Helping?" Jon asks, quiet in Brendon's ear. Brendon nods, still looking at Spencer.

"I'm just saying, I work hard every day. Brendon just overdid it one time," Spencer says, but the fight seems to have gone out of him.

"I'll owe you a massage," Jon tells Spencer, and Brendon can hear the smile in it. His fingers press just right on a knot in his back, and he thinks that perhaps he shouldn't let this go on much longer, or he's going to embarrass himself.

"Hey, what about me?" Ryan asks, looking perturbed.

"You, too," Jon promises, pressing down at the base of Brendon's neck, and Brendon can't help but hum in satisfaction.

"You two don't know what you're missing," Brendon teases. "Jon has magic fingers."

Ryan looks bothered by this for a moment, but Brendon doesn't worry about it for long when Jon proves his point by pressing on that same spot again.

Spencer scoffs at him, standing up to put his dishes away. Before he leaves, though, he says to Brendon, "Promise me you'll leave it until tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Brendon says, only half paying attention. He's seconds away from asking Spencer if he wants to have another lesson tonight when he realizes that he's not supposed to mention it in front of anyone else, not even Jon and Ryan. He could use telepathy, he realizes, but then that would put Spencer under stress about how to answer, so he decides to wait and ask later.

"Try not to hurt yourself," is all that Ryan says as he leaves, but Brendon knows him well enough to know that was just as friendly as Spencer's comment.

"Jon Walker, you are my favorite," Brendon says instead of the moan he kind of wants to utter.

"You only say that when I give you things," Jon answers in a fake whine.

"I'll still respect you in the morning, baby," Brendon says, tone as sincere as he can make it.

Jon snorts and takes his hands away. Brendon tries not to pout as he says, "Alright, you're not so tense anymore, session over."

"So if I get tense again...?" he asks, standing up to face Jon.

Jon rolls his eyes. "I am not your pleasure slave," he says with a smile.

Brendon doesn't dare follow that thought through, so he just laughs obnoxiously and concentrates on clearing his place at the table.

******

It's tough not to think about the locked files for the rest of the night, but Brendon pulls up a book and tries to focus on its pages for a little while after dinner. Spencer knocks on their connecting door while Brendon is reading, and Brendon remembers his intention to ask Spencer about a lesson.

"Hey," Brendon says, smiling. "Did you want to have another telepathy session?" he asks, doing jazz hands as he says it.

Spencer rolls his eyes and says, "If you're not too tired, that'd be cool."

"I'm not tired," Brendon says in answer, closing out everything on his panel. This time, Spencer pulls the desk chair up to the side of Brendon's bed before he sits. "Do you know what you'd like to work on specifically?" Brendon asks, since their last session had been a short amount of time devoted to a bunch of things that didn't work.

"Yeah, I wanna be able to do the message thing for anyone, not just Ryan. It'd be cool for you and I to be able to talk to each other without anyone else hearing," he says with a smirk.

Brendon's stomach flips over pleasantly as Spencer says that, and he can't help his smile. "Alright, well. Let's think about it this time before we start trying. You can say anything to Ryan, and it always works?"

Spencer nods. "When we were kids, I wound up telling him what I could do, but he wouldn't believe me until I could do it to him. With that much pressure, I figured out how to do it, and from then on I never had any trouble talking to him like that."

Brendon thinks about that. "Do you think it's easier because you know each other so well?"

"Maybe," Spencer says, shrugging. "I guess it was kinda like that. I felt like I knew how Ryan worked, so it was just another way of talking to him. I can adjust it depending on his mood, or whatever."

Brendon's never thought of it like that before, but he realizes now that he does adapt the tone of his messages depending on the person he's sending them to and how they're acting at the time. "That's good," he says. "I think that might be the key. Just get a read on the person's personality and their mood. And it's been easier for you to send them when your mind is racing, right? It was the same for me, and I think that's because we aren't thinking about how to do it then, just that we have to. Does that make any sense?"

Spencer stares at Brendon, and Brendon has no idea what he's thinking. "It does, I guess. But I don't know if that's going to help me do it right."

"Won't know until you try," Brendon says, crossing his legs and shifting on the bed so that he can face Spencer directly.

"Okay," Spencer says, mostly to himself, then he closes his eyes.

Brendon waits, completely calm, while Spencer does whatever he has to do. And he keeps waiting. He waits long enough until he doesn't think it's rude to interrupt and says, "Not working?"

Spencer's eyes open and his face heats up suddenly. "Uh, I actually couldn't think of what I wanted to say."

Brendon blinks for a moment and laughs. "Just say something like, 'Hi, Brendon.'"

"Yeah, okay," Spencer says, still blushing as he closes his eyes again.

Brendon closes his own eyes and focuses on Spencer. He doesn't try to listen to Spencer's thoughts, but he opens his mind so that the natural whisper of thought brushes against his consciousness. He's never been more tempted to read someone's mind than he has with Spencer, but the knowledge that Spencer would know he was doing it is enough to put an end to his temptation.

Hi, Brendon, he hears suddenly. He opens his eyes to find Spencer looking back. I have no idea what I'm doing.

Brendon beams at him, and Spencer mirrors the expression.

Or maybe I do know what I'm doing.

Do you think you'll be able to do this again, Brendon says, after some time has passed and maybe I'm in a different mood?

I think so, and Brendon can hear Spencer's confidence. It just feels right.

Brendon can't stop smiling, he's so happy and proud of Spencer.

What else can you teach me? Spencer asks eagerly.

******

Brendon is hard at work on the 'hacking problem' (as he's come to call it) for the fifth day in a row when Spencer pushes a thought into his mind. We're on planet all day, he says, and Brendon startles to hear his voice. It's calming, though, more so than his voice would be. Will you meet us at the bar tonight?

Brendon thrills at the anticipation in Spencer's tone. Of course, he responds.

I know you want to figure out the 'hacking problem,' but don't forget about us, okay?

Brendon turns to face Spencer, who is pretending to be busy looking over a shipment. "I'll see you tonight," Brendon says with a smile.

Spencer smiles back - a huge, genuine smile that kicks Brendon right between the ribs and knocks out his breath. "Awesome," Spencer says.

"Yeah," Brendon breathes, but Spencer is already walking away.

Brendon sighs and focuses on his work, reminding himself of all the reasons a crush on Spencer is a Bad Idea, namely because Spencer doesn't return it. He'd made that abundantly clear that Brendon was his subordinate at work, his teacher behind closed doors, and a friend otherwise, which didn't seem to leave room for anything else. Besides, Brendon knows it's safer if he doesn't let anyone get too close.

It doesn't take him long to get his mind back on the computer before him, but he feels like he's been going in circles for the past several hours of work he's put in. He finally decides to take a step back and get something to eat, hoping inspiration will strike after he walks away. Halfway through his peanut butter and jelly sandwich, sure enough, he gets a completely new idea, and he doesn't wait to finish his sandwich.

He rushes back to the cargo deck to try it out. It takes almost two hours just to set up the algorithm, but the moment he begins to run it, he knows it's going to work. The computer responds instantly and in just a few minutes he is able to access the files. He grins triumphantly at the screen, but when he turns away to announce his victory, he realizes he's alone. Disappointment washes over him even though he knows he can still let the guys know as soon as they meet up at the bar.

"Now what?" he asks the air, knowing that nothing is going to be able to hold his attention while this is on his mind. He pulls his device out of his pocket and is 90% done sending Spencer a message when he realizes he'd much rather tell him in person. Sighing, he puts the device back and heads back to his room. He lays on his bed, indecisive about how to kill the time, and before he realizes he's even tired, he falls asleep.

******

The buzz of his device against his thigh jolts him awake. "Whu?" he says after pressing the button, laying it on the desk.

"Brendon, man. You promised you'd be here. Spencer's pissed."

"Jon?" he asks, rubbing his eyes. "What time--?" He realizes suddenly what's happened. He fell asleep and now he's late to meet the guys.

"It's 8:15, I know you're not that late, but Spencer's been bitching since 7:55 that you're not going to show up. I just wanted to make sure you hadn't forgotten."

"No, I didn't--I fell asleep," he explains, already punching numbers into the wall so that he can get a change of clothes. "I'll be there as soon as I can, I promise."

"Shit, he's coming back. Bye!"

"I'll be there!" Brendon repeats, but the line is already dead. "Shit," he mumbles to himself, struggling to put on his button-up shirt as fast as he can. Just as he gets to the last button, he realizes he's done them up one off from each other and he has to start over. He carries his shoes onto the elevator and pulls them on as it goes down, and the only second he pauses is at the side door - he won't take any chances after that last break-in.

He's afraid that he's gotten himself lost for a few minutes, but then he turns a corner and recognizes the familiar look of an underground bar and heads inside. He spots Ryan first, making a beeline for him across the crowded room. "I got lost," he says immediately, sure that Ryan will be pissed that he was late.

Ryan raises his eyebrows. "Jon said you fell asleep."

"Oh, well that too. Where's Spencer?" he asks, looking around for him.

Ryan huffs a breath, but he points Brendon in the right direction.

Spencer is in the middle of a conversation with Pete, but Brendon doesn't let that stop him. He sneaks up behind Spencer and wraps his arms around him from behind, saying, "Spencer Smith! I finally fixed my computer problem!" Spencer stiffens at the contact, and doesn't relax until Brendon pushes into his head, Sorry I'm late.

"Hi, Pete," Brendon adds, smiling because he knows that Spencer has already forgiven him.

Pete smiles back. "You fixed your computer problem?" he asks, looking impressed. He waves in the direction of the bar and says, "Someone get this man a drink!"

When Pete looks to Brendon to see what he wants, Spencer answers for him. "A White Russian, extra creme."

Pete scurries away to get the drink, and Spencer breaks free of Brendon's arms to face him. "You forgot about us," he accuses, "to finish your problem."

"No," Brendon says solemnly. "I totally remembered, I just fell asleep accidentally."

Spencer watches him for a few moments, but then seems to give in. "Gabe's been looking for you all night. I don't know what he's up to, but I think it's probably safer to go to him than to force him to find you."

"Oh," Brendon says, feeling like an idiot. Spencer wasn't pissed because he wanted to see Brendon, he was pissed because he had to put up with Gabe. "I'll just go find him, then."

"Brendon!" Gabe says before Brendon can even spot him. "There you are. Come here, bro, I've got something to show you."

Brendon smiles warily as he approaches the group of people. He recognizes William Beckett as the one mostly wrapped around Gabe, but William doesn't acknowledge him.

"Yo, I need one more!" Gabe shouts in the direction of the bar, and Brendon watches as Pete doubles back to order another drink.

After a few moments of listening in on Gabe's drunken conversation with the people around him, Pete reappears with Brendon's drink, Gabe's drink, and Patrick Stump.

"Patrick!" Brendon says, grateful to see a sane face. "Gabe has something to show me. Should I be scared?" he adds in a whisper.

Patrick smiles, but doesn't give an answer either way. The slightly nervous look on his face speaks volumes, though.

"A toast!" Gabe shouts loud enough to disrupt the entire room. "To Brendon! For, uh..."

"Fixing his computer problem!" Pete supplies.

"Really?" Gabe says, eyes widening. "Sweet, dude! To Brendon, for fixing his computer!"

Close enough, Brendon thinks, watching in amazement as Gabe downs his entire drink in seconds to the cheers of his friends. He takes one cautious sip of his own drink before Gabe is leaning toward him, trying to convince him to dance with him on top of the table.

"Oh, thanks man, but I actually need to go see, uh," he glances around quickly, "Nick! I need to talk to Nick."

Gabe shrugs and pulls William up to dance with him instead, and Brendon doesn't feel bad because William doesn't protest a bit.

He has nothing at all to say to Nick Scimeca, but Pete is following along behind him with Patrick in tow, so Brendon goes to say hello anyway.

"Hey," Nick greets him cursorily before going back to his argument with De'Mar.

"Brendon fixed his computer problem!" Pete announces, as if they hadn't heard it when Gabe screamed it a few minutes ago. Brendon has no idea why Pete feels the need to repeat this to everyone Brendon meets tonight.

"That's great, dude," Nick says without looking at him. "Don't you think that this bar is way too over-priced?" he asks, looking first at Pete, then Brendon, then Patrick.

Brendon has no opinion on the matter, as Pete got his drink for him, so he wanders off while Pete joins into the conversation, talking about the pros and cons of running a bar.

"Jon!" he says when he finally finds one of his guys. "Jon, why is everyone so crazy tonight?" he asks, welcoming the hug that Jon offers.

Jon chuckles as he runs his hand over Brendon's back. "We were the last ones to get here," he says. "I think everyone else got started early."

"Well I'm sticking with you tonight," he vows. "At least while you're still making sense."

Jon gives him his typical smile and says, "I'm glad you showed up, Brendon. Spencer's not the only one who wanted to see you."

Brendon smiles at that, even if Spencer didn't really care about seeing Brendon so much as getting Gabe off of his back. He knows that Jon is sincere, and that makes him happy.

"And congrats on getting your hacking problem fixed," Jon says, and it's the first time Brendon feels good when someone says it.

"Thanks! I was so happy, but then it kinda sucked because you guys weren't there to tell about it."

"Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that," Jon says, and Brendon doesn't know whether to be nervous or excited. "Our next stop for delivery has a lot of stuff, so we were thinking of splitting up to make the deliveries. Would you mind coming with us? It'd probably be best for you to go with Ryan. He tends to have trouble with the technology, but don't tell him I said that."

Brendon grins. "That'd be awesome!" he says and means it. He loves being appreciated for his ability, sure, but for them to want him around even for the other mundane jobs, that makes him feel great.

"Yeah? It's not all that exciting, to be honest. But it'd keep you from being bored on the ship all day."

"It'll be great," Brendon insists, already excited for their next stop. "How long is it 'til the next stop?"

Jon looks amused. "Probably 7 or 8 days, depending on how long it takes us to get finished up here. Hey, man," he says as Ryan approaches them. "Brendon just agreed to go with us at our next stop."

Ryan slides up to Jon's side easily and steals a sip of Jon's drink. "That's great," he says, glancing at Brendon. "D'you wanna dance?" he asks Jon, and Brendon feels a sudden twinge of jealousy as he watches Ryan's hand disappear behind Jon's back.

"I don't wanna leave Brendon alone," Jon says, shooting him a wink. "I think Gabe scarred him for life," he fake-whispers in Ryan's ear.

"You wanna dance?" Ryan asks, looking at Brendon.

"Oh, I don't really know how--"

"Great," Ryan asks, ignoring his answer and taking his hand to pull him out to the open area constituting the dance floor.

Brendon is reassured pretty quickly when he discovers that Ryan can't dance either, so he just kind of goes with it. Several of their crew join them on the floor after a few moments, and as they're too drunk to notice if Brendon can't dance, he relaxes quite a bit.

Ryan says something to Brendon as they move, but Brendon can't distinguish the sound over the noise of the music. "What?" he shouts back at Ryan.

Brendon's breath stutters when Ryan presses against him fully and says with his mouth against Brendon's ear, "I said, so does this mean you're going to stop hanging out in front of that computer all the time?"

"What, now that I fixed the hacking problem?"

"Yeah," Ryan says, still moving to the music but staying pressed against Brendon.

Brendon swallows hard and tries not to think about anything but their conversation. "I guess so. I mean, I won't have as much work to do. Just whatever I had before."

Ryan nods and wraps an arm around Brendon as he dances. "Good."

Brendon focuses on the music after that, feeling every inch of Ryan that's pressed against him but trying not to think about it, and finally he's granted a reprieve when William cuts in and asks Brendon to tell him a story.

"Um," Brendon says, wishing he could be back in his room already. "Once upon a time, there was a dragon."

"Ooh," William says, pleased. "Was it a mechanical dragon?"

Brendon frowns, because can't the dragons be real anymore? He remembers the stories his grandmother always told him, and in them all the dragons were real. "Sure," he concedes. "One day the dragon--"

"And is he a good dragon?"

"Yeah, he's the best fucking mechanical dragon ever made," he says, humoring him but already looking for a way out. "And then one day he met a robot human named Bill and fell in love and then they lived happily ever after. Oh look, there's Spencer, I gotta go!"

"That's so sweet!" William shouts even as Brendon runs away from him. He's glad William didn't take offense at being called a robot, though he's not entirely sure he had time to make the connection.

"Spencer!" Brendon yells, trying to get his attention. Spencer doesn't turn around, though, and keeps moving away from the crowd, toward the door. Brendon shouts his name again, but he can instantly tell that it washes into the background noise. Spencer, he finally tries, and sees the instant effect as Spencer stops in his tracks.

Yeah? he sends back, and Brendon can tell that he's not happy.

I've been looking for you. You disappeared on me.

Spencer turns around, taking a second to scan the crowd before he sees Brendon. That's what I've been thinking about you.

Brendon bounds up to him when he realizes they've just been seemingly staring at each other in silence for the last while. "You're the one that told me to go find Gabe. It just got crazy from there."

Spencer laughs, though his heart doesn't seem to be in it. "It's kinda loud in here. I think I just wanna head back to the ship."

"Okay, I'll come with you! Um, I mean, do you mind if I come with you?"

Spencer's bites his bottom lip briefly, glancing around the crowded bar. "No, I don't mind. Let's go."

Brendon bounces a bit on the walk back to the ship. "So how did your deliveries go?" he asks, feeling ridiculous with his small talk but mind racing too fast to come with anything else.

"Same old story," Spencer says, shrugging.

"Oh."

They go on in silence, and Brendon fights not to fill the gap with his usual inane rambling. He can never tell if he's had enough alcohol to make his ramblings even more embarrassing than usual, so he finds it better to keep quiet.

"I'm glad you fixed your hacking problem," Spencer finally says.

"Oh! Yeah, man, I was so close to messaging you, but I decided to--" he pauses, wishing he could take it back. "Um. To tell you in person."

He glances over just in time to see Spencer ducking his head. "So does this mean you're gonna return to the land of the living now? Hang out again?"

Brendon hadn't realized that he'd been so absent over the past five days, but apparently it was enough for the guys to miss him. That thought warms him, though he tries to keep it from showing too much. "Yeah, I'm all yours from now on."

As they approach the ship and Spencer begins to work with the manual lock, Brendon has a sudden thought. "Hey, you know this ship has the capabilities to have a second, computerized lock. I could totally set it up and give us the extra security so that we won't wind up with some homeless guy breaking in again."

Spencer looks surprised for a moment, then a little disgruntled. "That'd be cool," he says, but it falls flat and he won't look at Brendon.

"What?"

"Nothing. That'd be really useful to the ship. I'll let Max know."

"No, c'mon, you're unhappy with me. What'd I do?"

Spencer yanks the door open as he gets the lock free, but Brendon follows in on his heels, not letting up.

"Okay," Spencer finally says, annoyed at Brendon's incessant questions. "I just-- you just said you'd stop spending every waking moment working on the computer, and then you turned around and made plans to do just that."

"Oh," Brendon says, momentarily shocked into silence. He never would've guessed that was what Spencer was mad about. "It's not--uh, I kind of already have the programming to set up that kind of lock?"

Spencer gives him a blank stare, and Brendon notices that his cheeks are still red. "What do you mean?"

"I... kind of wrote the program in my spare time," Brendon admits, feeling like a complete loser.

Spencer snorts, much to Brendon's surprise, before he starts laughing outright. "Brendon, dude. You've really got to start hanging out with us more often. They always said I was bad, but you. You work way too much."

Brendon tentatively smiles, hoping that means he's forgiven. "I don't want to be a bother," he says, remembering his experience at the Academy.

"Oh for fuck's sake," Spencer mumbles, nudging Brendon onto the elevator. "You worry too much. C'mon, you can teach me some more telepathy tricks before Ryan and Jon get back."

Brendon smiles to himself as the elevator slides up to their floor. There's no doubt about it, he has friends now.

******

A few days later, Spencer is sitting on Brendon's bed, facing Brendon with his legs crossed in a basic yoga pose.

"I know it's kind of antiquated," Brendon explains, "but it helps me clear my mind. Maybe it'll work for you, too."

Spencer looks unconvinced. "I feel ridiculous sitting like this."

Brendon rolls his eyes and ignores that negativity, reaching out to steady Spencer's knee into the right place. Spencer glares at him, but doesn't move away or push him away, so Brendon isn't too discouraged.

"Okay," Brendon says, settling. "I'm going to open my mind and focus on a color. If you can figure out how to read my thoughts, then tell me what color it is."

Brendon concentrates on a very particular shade of blue, attempting to shield the rest of his thoughts. If Spencer does figure this out, Brendon doesn't want him to be overwhelmed with all the sudden noise. Not to mention that he's a little afraid of what Spencer would think if he could hear Brendon's every thought.

He focuses intently on the color for a while, then accentuates it by thinking of things that are that color - the daytime sky, some of their cargo boxes, this one really obnoxious suit that he saw a man wearing at their last stop.

Finally, Brendon reaches a point where he's far too bored to concentrate any longer, so he leans forward and places his hand on Spencer's knee. Spencer's eyes open and meet his and - oh, there's something else that color.

"Light blue," Spencer says with a tone of wonder. Brendon closes his mind reflexively at the intrusion as he stares at Spencer in shock, and he sees Spencer flinch just slightly as he does it.

"Sorry," Brendon hurries to say, "it's been a while since anyone got inside my head." He pulls his hand back, unable to take his eyes off Spencer.

"That was really--"

"Weird?"

"Cool," Spencer says, exhaling. "I don't even know how I did it."

Brendon doesn't understand that, but then again, he was hearing thoughts involuntarily when he was ten years old. For him, it was always a matter of stopping rather than starting. "Do you want to try again? I didn't mean to--"

"No," Spencer says instantly. "I think I'm good for today, actually."

Brendon runs a hand through his hair, feeling guilty. "Sorry," he says again, even though he's not sure exactly what he's apologizing for.

"It's fine," Spencer insists. "I just, I think this is giving me a headache. Do you mind stopping for now?"

"No, of course not," Brendon says quickly. "This is completely up to you, anyway." He can't quite shake the feeling that Spencer is annoyed at him. A nervous part of him wonders if Spencer caught any of the associations he made when he realized Spencer's eyes were exactly the shade of blue he was thinking of.

"Thanks," Spencer says, giving him a small smile as he stands. "I'll let you know when I'm ready to work on it again?"

"Sure," Brendon nods eagerly, but as Spencer closes the door that joins their two rooms, he can't help but wish he had some reason to call Spencer back. He sighs and activates his panel, looking for a distraction.

******

Brendon loses his excitement for his first delivery when he discovers that they're returning to Earth to make it. The guys clearly think that he'll be comfortable going out on a planet he's familiar with, but he doesn't know how to tell them in a vague enough manner that this is where he's at the most risk. As they close up the hatch, cargo in tow, he can't help feeling extremely nervous. He's pretty sure the guys can tell, but they haven't said anything. He's not sure if he's glad they're ignoring his anxiety or if he wants them to reassure him.

When the time comes, Jon and Spencer separate what they need for their delivery and say their goodbyes. Brendon attacks Spencer with a hug, as he so often does, but Spencer doesn't protest, just rests a hand low on Brendon's back and wishes him luck. Brendon's still nervous, but the smile that he gets from Spencer helps him settle in his skin a little more.

He goes on to hug Jon, ignoring Ryan's eyeroll and insistence that they all need to get going. While they're hugging, Jon murmurs low in his ear, "Everything's gonna be fine. It might not be easy, but it'll work out in the end." He squeezes Brendon's arm as he pulls back. "Trust me. And try not to think so much."

He seems so sure of himself that it actually works, Brendon's able to take a deep breath and go off with Ryan with some confidence. It doesn't last, though, because minutes later, Ryan breaks the silence to say, "You're really worried about this, aren't you? You do know that we're just glorified UPS guys, right?"

Brendon's confidence deflates right there, but he tries not to let it show. He reminds himself that Ryan doesn't know, can't possibly imagine how bad it might be for Brendon to be recognized or caught using his abilities. He'd be shipped back to the Academy, and who knows what would happen there. And if Ryan didn't know that, then there's no way Jon would understand either, so his advice didn't even apply. "Yeah," he finally says, voice flat. "I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Hey." Ryan stops, giving him a long look. "C'mere."

Brendon hesitates, but Ryan moves forward and slides a hand around Brendon's elbow to maneuver him into a hug. Brendon melts into the hug a little bit, because even though Ryan tolerates all Brendon's cuddling, he never initiates it. "Seriously," Ryan mumbles, and Brendon tries not to focus on the feeling of Ryan's fingers spread out between his shoulder blades, "we'll be back on the ship before you know it."

Brendon nods, pulling away. What are the odds that he'll be recognized anyway? It's not like he's going to slip up and read any minds. He feels a little more grounded for the rest of the walk, though that may have something to do with Ryan's arm slung around his waist.

When they reach the meeting place, Brendon hits a few buttons on the hover board and looks over the information to make sure they've brought everything. It's all completely unnecessary, as they'd checked it all before they left, but Brendon wants to keep himself busy and Ryan doesn't say anything, so it's no big deal.

After checking over everything twice, he finally has to admit that everything is as it should be. He's just about to go sit down next to Ryan when the device in his pocket vibrates insistently. got everything? ;) -Spencer

Brendon glares at Ryan. "Are you talking about me to Spencer?"

Ryan shrugs. "And Jon. I was bored, and you were apparently busy."

Brendon ignores the comment and pulls out his device. "You wanna play a game while we wait?" Ryan nods, and they play a number game that Brendon had to learn his first year at the Academy. He tries not to beat Ryan too badly, but Ryan's face is still pinched by the time the game ends.

They lapse into silence then, and Brendon tries not to glance at the clock too often. He can't help but feel paranoid. Why would they be late? Had someone tipped them off about Brendon? Was he about to be arrested, and would Ryan be in trouble too?

Ryan lays a hand over Brendon's knee, and he stops bouncing it up and down. "Sorry," he murmurs.

Ryan looks contemplative for a moment, then stands up to walk over to the hover board. He starts to tug on it, and Brendon is seconds away from saying What the fuck are you doing? when Ryan says, "Will you give me a hand with this?"

"What the fuck are you doing?" Brendon asks, but he still goes over to help. Ryan scowls, though Brendon's not sure if it's at him or the hover board. "Here, let go," he says, then goes through the menu to select the auto-release.

"Oh," Ryan says as the mechanism expands to move the boxes off. "I will never understand technology."

Brendon grins at him, then moves over to let him take over. He still has no idea what Ryan's up to. Ryan takes a little while with the menu before clambering up onto the board as it hovers a few feet off the ground. Ryan holds out a hand, looking expectant.

"What are you doing?" Brendon asks, looking around for their customers, willing them to appear to keep him safe from Ryan's schemes.

"C'mon, dude, trust me." He stretches his hand out further, and Brendon's reminded of one of those really old Disney movies that his grandmother let him watch when he was a kid. Do you trust me? He takes Ryan's hand.

When the board starts to move, Brendon jumps and grabs onto Ryan's arm. He's a little reassured when Ryan only gives him an annoyed look. He realizes then that Ryan has set up a course around the room, just to fly around and pass the time.

He eases his grip on Ryan's arm, but doesn't let go. "What if they show up? Isn't this a little unprofessional?"

"No more unprofessional than being over 30 minutes late to a meeting." He sits down and lets his legs hang over the side, gesturing for Brendon to do the same. Brendon does, but very slowly. "Spence and I used to borrow his dad's board every time he was out of the house and ride around like this. The old lady that lived next door caught us once, and we had to hear her safety lecture for almost an hour."

Brendon takes in Ryan's smirk as he relives the memory. "You guys have been friends for a long time, huh?" He tries to push down the spark of jealousy.

"Yeah," Ryan says, and now he looks wistful. "We had secrets, and we only trusted each other." Brendon thinks of Spencer's psychic thing and wonders what Ryan might have shared that seemed just as big and scary as that when they were kids. He knows talking about Ryan's family is off-limits, so he won't ask, but he still wonders.

"I wish I'd had somebody like that." He didn't mean to say it out loud, but he won't take it back, not when he thinks back to being twelve years old and getting in a van to go off to a school for "specials" because his parents refused to deal with him anymore. Maybe if he'd known Spencer, they could've figured it out together and never let their parents find out a thing.

He snaps out of it when Ryan's hand closes over his. He realizes that on most days, they would all three be giving him such crap for all this moping and worrying, but for some reason, they're all comforting him, especially Ryan. He starts to ask Ryan why that is when they both hear a shout from outside the building. Ryan scrambles to stop the hover board, and they stumble off next to the cargo right as a group of four big guys come in, loud and obnoxious. They're all holding big glass bottles. Drunk, then.

"Oh, good, we 'ere wond'rin' when that stuff'd get here," the guy in the front says.

Ryan visibly stiffens, so Brendon steps up. "It got here an hour ago, at the time we agreed to beforehand." He struggles to keep his tone polite. "Now if you could just sign--"

"N'hang on," one of the other guys says, practically shouting. "Are you insin--insin'yatin' somethin' here?"

Brendon struggles to remain calm, even though he can feel Ryan seething, his thoughts building up so much that Brendon has to concentrate to keep them out. "Of course not, sir. Now if you'd just sign this--"

"Hey!"

Brendon just registers that this shout came from Ryan, but then Ryan's rushing over to get the hover board back from the other two guys, and the next thing he knows, everything goes chaotic and he's on the ground.

"Ow," he moans. His head hurts like a bitch.

"Shit," Ryan whispers, coming into Brendon's line of vision. "Just go, I don't want to deal with you anymore!" Ryan shouts over his shoulder. Brendon wishes he wouldn't. His head feels like it's exploding.

"What happened?" Brendon grunts, trying to sit up. Ryan holds him down.

"One of those motherfuckers threw a bottle at you. I'm still not convinced it wasn't on purpose," he says darkly, glancing over his shoulder. "Sit still," he says, pushing Brendon's shoulder down again. He pushes Brendon's hair back and skirts his fingers around the place where Brendon assumes the bottle hit. It suddenly throbs really painfully and Brendon hisses. Ryan draws his hand back, muttering an apology.

"How bad is it?"

"I think you'll live," Ryan says, but he keeps looking at the place on Brendon's forehead until it makes Brendon feel self-conscious. He bites his lip, and Ryan's eyes dart down to follow the motion. His fingers slide down to rest over Brendon's cheekbone. This time, when Brendon sits up, Ryan lets him.

"Ryan?" he asks, testing his ground, but before he can begin to think of what to ask, Ryan's lips are on his. Brendon gasps, and Ryan brings up both hands to frame Brendon's face before licking his way into Brendon's mouth. Brendon doesn't bother to hide his moan because maybe this is making his head throb, but it's also making his dick throb and Ryan is kind of a ridiculously thorough kisser. Ryan hums into Brendon's mouth, his hands gripping more insistently as he moves more into Brendon's space. Suddenly Ryan pulls back from the kiss and he's in Brendon's lap, looking very debauched, and Brendon is unbelievably turned on.

"What are the odds of getting back to the ship without being stopped?" Brendon asks even as he leans forward to bite at Ryan's lip.

Ryan doesn't answer right away, mostly because he can only do so much with his mouth at one time, but then he pulls away to catch his breath and says, "Jon and Spencer were gonna head to the bar."

Brendon closes his eyes for a moment, knowing that it's not going to be easy to walk back to the ship, but reminding himself that it'll be worth it once they get there.

"We can ride on the hover board."

Ryan is always full of good ideas.

******

Brendon tries to wait until they make it to their deck to resume whatever it is they started, but as soon as they get into the elevator, he can't help himself. Ryan responds in kind, fingers sliding under Brendon's shirt and tracing patterns along his back.

"How's your head?" Ryan murmurs just as the elevator dings and the doors slide open.

"Fine," Brendon insists, and it's actually true. His thoughts have been pretty focused on Ryan this whole time, which he wouldn't have thought could be possible with the initial amount of pain he felt.

"You sure?" Ryan asks, amused, as he observes Brendon's expression.

Brendon growls and pulls Ryan out of the elevator by the shirt only to push him against the nearest wall. This is no time for Ryan to be amused.

"Fuck, Brendon," Ryan says as Brendon sucks on his neck, slides his fingers over the skin of Ryan's hips, and pushes his leg between Ryan's.

"That's the general idea."

"Bed," Ryan demands, pushing Brendon toward the living area. Brendon hesitates between the two doors, but Ryan makes the decision for him as he heads into his own room, throwing his shirt at Brendon as he walks.

After Brendon discards his own shirt, they continue making out on the bed for a little while. Brendon feels the ever-present whisper of Ryan's thoughts in the back of his mind, but he presses down the urge to filter them in. He's always got control, thanks to the Academy, but he's always tempted during sex to throw caution to the wind just to make people feel good. Just to know he's doing things right.

Instead, he's learned just to ask. "What do you want?"

Ryan stares at Brendon's lips with his own mouth hanging open for long enough that Brendon thinks he knows the answer, but Ryan surprises him. "Want you to fuck me," he says, pulling out a drawer and handing the tube to Brendon.

"Fuck," and that's another reason why he's glad he doesn't listen in. Sometimes it's nice to be surprised.

When he's got two fingers inside, pressing Ryan just right, Ryan makes this low, insistent noise and mumbles, "Wanted this so much. Fuck." His toes curl against Brendon's side, an invitation for him to press a third finger inside.

"You look so fucking good like this," Brendon says, taking in the completely wanton look on Ryan's face, the way he tips his head back and pushes his hips as Brendon presses in.

"C'mon," Ryan says, insistent, shifting his hips.

"Alright, alright, hold your horses," Brendon says, trying to keep calm and not embarrass himself so soon. Ryan glares at him, and it's just enough to take the edge off of his desperation.

When he pushes his way all the way in, Ryan digs his heels into Brendon's shoulders and tells him to move, and Brendon's neverending thought of sogoodsogoodohgod is paused long enough to be amused at Ryan being a total power bottom. It gives him the presence of mind to smile down at Ryan and then pull all the way out, slamming back in, and yeah, he knew Ryan would love that without needing to invade the privacy of his thoughts.

His control slips down to power-saver mode soon after that, and he finds himself babbling things like "knew you'd feel perfect" and "wanted to hear you," and he's not even embarrassed because Ryan is giving it back just as much.

Brendon feels his thrusts get more erratic, hoping it's not too soon, and then Ryan moans and comes all over his stomach. Brendon has just enough time to register Ryan's blissed-out look and how tight and perfect he feels before he's coming too, hips still pumping helplessly.

Brendon doesn't exactly expect Ryan to be tolerant of cuddling, but after cleaning the two of them off, he lets Brendon pull him in and turns Brendon's quick, gentle kiss into something with a little more intent.

"'ll try to wake up before Jon 'n' Spence get back," Ryan mumbles into Brendon's shoulder, but Brendon's not sure if he means himself or both of them. He absently wonders what Spencer and Jon would do if they found the two of them like this, and his mind trips over the possibilities as he slips off to sleep.

******

Brendon wakes up to Spencer saying, "Breeendonnnn!" from the hallway, following it up with a pretty uncharacteristic giggle.

"Shit," Ryan whispers, stiffening but not moving away from Brendon. Spencer appears in the doorway, and Brendon watches as the huge, drunk smile slips right off his face.

"Hey, Spence," Brendon tries, but Spencer just stands there, staring at them with that unchanging expression. Then, just as suddenly as he'd appeared, he turns and disappears, and then they both jump as they hear a door slam.

The tension drains out of Ryan's body, and he makes a miserable noise into Brendon's shoulder. "He's gonna be pissed at me."

Brendon traces circles into Ryan's hip and tries not to sound as utterly confused as he feels when he asks, "Why?"

Ryan doesn't answer, and Brendon can't read his expression when he leans in to press his lips to Brendon's. The kiss is so much sweeter than anything from earlier that Brendon finds himself clinging, desperate because it feels like an ending.

"Get dressed," Ryan says, getting up to do the same. Brendon trips over his jeans while trying to get them on because he's too busy staring at Ryan, but Ryan doesn't even notice. He's seconds away from letting himself read Ryan's mind when Ryan glances in his direction, and Brendon feels so guilty he pulls his shirt on inside-out. Ryan laughs at him, and it sounds so far-away and fake that Brendon's chest tightens in anticipation.

He knows he should just go. Ryan's looking more closed-off with every passing second, but he's too selfish, he has to know how real this was for Ryan. Reading his mind without permission goes against everything Brendon believes in, so he moves into Ryan's space and makes him uncross him arms while he kisses him, one last time. He puts everything into it, how much he wanted this, how much he still does, and fuck, Ryan's hands fist into Brendon's shirt and he gives it all right back. Which makes everything worse when Ryan pulls back and keeps his eyes closed while he says, "You should go. Jon's probably down on the lower deck."

Brendon waits, but even when Ryan shudders just slightly and opens his eyes, he won't look Brendon in the eye. Brendon makes a frustrated noise and stomps over to his own room, slamming the door. Fuck Ryan. Fuck Spencer, who the fuck does he think he is? Brendon trusted him with something that could cost him his life, and this is how he repays him? Wasn't it bad enough that he's completely unavailable to Brendon, now he's keeping Ryan from him too? Fuck the world, seriously.

He hears their voices rise next door, but he blocks them out, pounding numbers into the computer. They'd lifted off while Brendon was asleep, and Brendon can't help throwing in a fuck the captain for that, because more than ever he just wants to walk around and find a random bar with a bartender that will listen to him for a little while.

And fuck his morals, god, because suddenly he hears I can't believe you would fucking stoop that low in what is clearly Spencer's inner voice, because of course Spencer can't fucking control his own ability right now. Perfect. The computer seems to sense his frustration, maybe in the way he's abusing the buttons, and helpfully informs him that Jon is milling about on the lower deck at the moment.

Brendon sighs, resting his forehead against the coolness of the computer console. He can't sit around and listen to this, and his anger is replaced with hopelessness as he takes in what Spencer really thinks of him. Jon Walker may not be obligated to listen to his woes, but he might just do it anyway. He's cool like that. Brendon makes up his mind and gets onto the elevator quickly, hoping to avoid overhearing any more declarations.

Jon spots him right away, offering a lazy smile and a greeting instantly. A second look at Brendon's expression, though, and he looks concerned and moves in to hug him. Brendon loves Jon Walker hugs, because they never seem to ask anything of him, and always seem to give him exactly what he's looking for.

"C'mere," Jon finally says, tugging until Brendon follows him between the boxes on deck. Brendon's never really thought about this being a place to hide away, but it makes sense now as Jon sits down and pats the ground next to him.

Brendon lowers himself onto the cold floor and tries to shut down Spencer saying "stoop that low, fucking stoop that low" on repeat in his head. "Jon," he starts to ask shyly, "do you think...?" Fuck, he doesn't know how to ask this without sounding like a complete idiot.

Jon makes a 'go on' noise, wrapping his arm around Brendon's shoulders.

"Would you think less of someone else if they decided to sleep with me?"

Jon stiffens next to him, and when Brendon looks, Jon is livid. He's never seen Jon look so angry. "Who said that about you? We will turn this fucking ship around and I will beat up whoever said that, Brendon, I swear."

That's almost enough to make Brendon smile, except it's not some stranger, it's Spencer, someone that knows Brendon well enough to support his opinion. "It wasn't on planet," Brendon mumbles.

The angry look slides off Jon's face. "What?" he asks, voice soft.

"Spencer," Brendon says, trying to hide his face in his knees. "Spencer said it."

Jon snorts, but when Brendon looks at him, miserable, he stops. "You must have heard him wrong," Jon insists.

Brendon shakes his head. "It was all pretty clear."

Jon brings up his other arm to give Brendon a sideways hug, and Brendon tilts his head over to rest on Jon's shoulder. "Then he didn't mean it, Brendon, I know he didn't."

Brendon wants to say that it's pretty hard to lie in your own head, but he can't, so he just settles on shaking his head some more. With some urging, Brendon fills Jon in on what happened, leaving out the parts where he was desperate and pathetic.

Jon gives him another hug when it's over, but insists, "There's something missing there, Brendon. There's no way Spencer would say that about you." After a moment, Jon looks shifty and then offers Brendon something quietly.

"Seriously?" Brendon says, taking it. "Weed? Hey, is this stuff legal in space?"

Jon shrugs and says, "It's not really regulated," and that's that. This is why Jon is the best person to go to with your problems; he always has some solution.

Brendon smokes up with Jon, and before long he finds himself moaning about "all these feelings, Jon, it's just not fair."

Jon nods along, staying quiet for the most part, and Brendon starts to feel a little lighter, confiding in Jon like this. He's mumbling around the joint in an attempt to tell Jon just that, but then Jon takes the joint from Brendon's mouth and puts his lips there instead, and Brendon stops babbling.

Jon kisses him softly and Brendon kisses back in a daze, wondering when he earned this privilege. "This isn't a big deal, okay?" Jon asks, and Brendon nods helplessly, taking in the next kiss that Jon presses to his lips. "You promise not freak out on me?" and Brendon just nods some more until he feels ridiculous and they both start giggling. They go back to lazy kisses and smoking, and Brendon starts to forget about Spencer and what he may or may not have meant.

******

Brendon really expects the shit to hit the fan after that, but when nothing happens and really nothing happens and Ryan and Spencer are both trying to act like nothing has changed, Brendon goes to Jon.

"They're both avoiding me but pretending not to. I think I'd be the first to know if they suddenly had that much work to do," he says, gesturing at a nearby computer. "And speaking of, you do need to sort the purple order into two shipments. I can help if you want."

Jon thanks him for that, but it's not like he was doing anything else. They start pulling out smaller boxes from the bigger boxes, and Brendon still has no idea what it is they deliver to people. This whole ship is a huge fucking mystery. Halfway through the job, Brendon tries to casually slip in, "So what did Ryan say when he found out you and I, y'know, made out?"

Jon gives him a look that says I see straight through you and says, "I didn't tell him."

Brendon says "oh" without inflection and tries to focus on stacking the small boxes just right.

"I meant it when I said it wasn't a big deal. It was fun, we both enjoyed it." He shrugs. "Ryan and I do it too, sometimes."

Brendon stares back at him, wide-eyed. He can't think of what to say to that. "Does Spencer know?"

Jon bites his lip a bit before finally shaking his head. "Listen, Brendon. You've only been around here for a couple of months. Don't try so hard, y'know? Just take your time, figure out what you want. I bet if you wait, things will work out all on their own." He claps Brendon on the shoulder, then goes back to sorting.

******

The problem, if Brendon is completely honest with himself, is that he wants them all, even though that thought just makes him feel like a two-year-old with grabby hands. And it's not just that they're all attractive and he can picture himself with each of them (though they are, and he has), but he trusts and really cares for all three of them. His feelings for each of them are different, but they all feel the same at the heart of it. Choosing one just seems arbitrary and makes him feel weird.

He tries to push down all of these feelings and just focus on getting his friends back. Luckily, Ryan goes pretty much back to normal within a couple of days, so Brendon feels less like he's stuck on a ship with nothing but Jon and computers to keep him company.

Spencer, though, has taken to bolting out of a room within five minutes of Brendon entering one. When they do have to talk to each other, Spencer takes on this all-business attitude that makes Brendon want to hit things. He hasn't seen Spencer smile in almost a week, and the worst part of it is that he doesn't know what he did wrong. He should be mad at Spencer, not the other way around.

Which is why it's really weird when Spencer shows up at his door after midnight one night. Weird enough that Brendon has to stop and make sure he's not dreaming when he's woken up by Spencer's gentle, "Brendon? Are you awake?"

"Mffl," Brendon mumbles. "What time 's it?"

"Sorry, I, uh. It's pretty late. Can I come in?"

Brendon blinks at the sight of him in the doorway. He really doesn't want to deal with whatever this might be while he's just woken up, but. "Yeah, sure."

He yawns huge and obnoxious, rubbing at his eyes, and when he opens them, Spencer is standing at the side of his bed. Brendon blinks at him, waiting for the automatic contacts to kick in, and just as he gestures for Spencer to sit on the edge of the bed, Spencer blurts, "I owe you an apology." Brendon blinks some more, and Spencer comes into focus. "Oh," Spencer says, blushing and sitting.

"What're you," he pauses to yawn, "'pologizing for?" Brendon asks.

"I, uh," he begins, biting his lip and letting his gaze slip down to the comforter. "I kind of overreacted the other day. It's... none of my business what you do with Ryan."

Brendon waits, but Spencer doesn't add anything else. "Okay," he says. That still doesn't explain why Spencer has been avoiding him ever since, but if the way Spencer is nervously picking at the comforter is any indication, he has more to say.

"Jon told me that you overheard something."

Oh. So it's gonna be one of those talks. Brendon really wishes he was awake for this, but then again, maybe in the morning he can pretend it was all a dream.

"I think I can figure out what it is you heard. But Brendon," and oh, Spencer's making eye contact now, "that wasn't about you at all." He reaches out and touches the comforter where Brendon's knee is, and Brendon just stares at his hand in disbelief. "I can't explain; I wish I could, but. You gotta know I would never say something like that, not about you."

Brendon swallows thickly. He really can't believe Spencer would lie like this, and he's really not prepared to deal with it right now.

Hey, and Brendon wants to flinch, but Spencer's thought-voice is so much more soothing and real. I'm serious. I would never even think anything like that. In fact, I think you're pretty awesome.

And then they're not just words anymore, because Brendon can feel the emotion behind them. Brendon's heart stumbles over itself to catch up with this turn of events, and when he stares back at Spencer, wide-eyed, Spencer is blushing.

"Okay?" Spencer asks shyly.

Brendon covers Spencer's hand over his knee. He smiles. "Yeah. Yeah, we're okay."

He feels that familiar expanding in his chest when Spencer smiles back.

******

After a couple of days of tiptoeing around Spencer, Brendon gets tired of worrying so much and knocks on Spencer's door. He hears the "come in," but an apology is the first thing out of his mouth when he realizes Spencer is in bed.

"It's okay, I wasn't going to sleep," Spencer says, stretching to stop the music streaming from his computer. "What's up?"

"I just wondered if you wanted to practice some more?" he asks cautiously.

Spencer agrees and gestures for Brendon to sit on his bed. Surprised, Brendon shuts the door behind him and sits, absently pulling on the cuffs of his shirt.

"D'you maybe wanna try to read my mind again?" Brendon offers, hoping that whatever scared Spencer off before is no longer a problem.

Spencer consents to this, and they spend an hour or so trying to figure out how to make it work.

"It worked last time," Spencer finally says, exasperated.

Brendon can barely remember "last time," it seems like it happened so long ago, but, "There must be something you did differently that time. Do you remember?"

Spencer thinks back, and Brendon does the same. All he can remember now, though, is sitting cross-legged across from Spencer and hating himself for being discovered fantasizing about Spencer's eye color. Since Spencer is sitting in that same position as last time and has been for the past few attempts, that can't be it, though Brendon wishes it were that simple.

"Let me just try one more time," Spencer mumbles, pushing his hair out of his eyes and getting that focused look that Brendon can't help but find endearing.

Brendon concentrates on the song that's stuck in his head, since he's having trouble thinking of much else, but this turns out to be a bad idea when he starts humming it after only a minute has passed, and he has to apologize and let Spencer 'start over'. He's incredibly bored, so he plays that statement on repeat in his head and hopes that Spencer can finally read it so that they can do something more interesting.

Spencer's eventual sigh sounds heavier than normal, so Brendon makes sympathetic noises and tells him the story of how terrible he once was at school.

"I was supposed to be learning how to hear one person's thoughts and block the rest out, but I was young and I didn't understand, I just heard it all, so I asked my teacher why he would cheat on his husband with a woman. I told him girls were gross."

Spencer makes a choking noise, clearly not expecting to laugh, and it only makes Brendon smile harder. He adds, "It's a statement that still rings true, if you ask me."

Spencer rolls his eyes, but he does seem slightly cheered despite it all. "I'm surprised he didn't fail you right there," he says.

"Well let's just say he didn't stick around much longer after I figured out how to filter in thoughts." Brendon stretches obnoxiously over Spencer's bed, loving the feeling after sitting in one position for so long. Spencer grimaces and pushes Brendon's legs away, but Brendon doesn't take it personally. "Whatever, you love me." He gets another eye roll for that, but he can't help but smile as he asks, "So do you wanna work on the mental block now?"

Several emotions flit over Spencer's face in rapid succession, and Brendon doesn't understand why, but Spencer looks completely freaked out. "No, no I don't think, I mean, no."

Brendon begins to backpedal, "Oh, I just--"

"No," Spencer says again, shaking his head firmly.

Brendon holds his hands up in surrender, wishing he hadn't asked. "Okay, we won't do it! I didn't mean, you know I won't read your mind if you don't agree to it first."

"I know, I just. It feels weird, and I never know what you're going to find in there," he says, not looking Brendon in the eye.

Brendon assures him that he really honestly only looks at the surface, because that's all he needs to see to know if there's a shield or not. So usually it's just the repetition of Spencer trying to shield his mind (which means he's doing it wrong, but they've been over that), or frivolous things like if it's too hot or too cold or there's a distant ache in Spencer's toe.

Spencer smiles at that, cutting his eyes back at Brendon. After a few seconds of silence, he agrees to try it, just once because he doesn't want to walk away with a headache this time.

Brendon closes his eyes, getting in his zen place, and gives Spencer a few minutes to try to get it together, as usual. Finally, he just barely pries into Spencer’s thoughts.

 

Fucking block, how do I--just don't think about his mouth--fuck--block, block, maybe if I--

Brendon forces himself to stop listening, eyes popping open in surprise. Spencer's face is scrunched up in concentration, and Brendon reaches up to smooth out the lines, almost without thinking.

Spencer starts at the contact, blinking at Brendon. "Shit. Did you hear--?"

"Sorry," Brendon says by default, his fingers still lingering at the edge of Spencer's face. His heart is racing, and he can't quite hide his smile, but he owes it to Spencer to own up. "I should've stopped listening immediately. But your thoughts just sound so nice."

Spencer lets out a self-deprecating laugh. "You know how if you try really hard not to think about something, you think about it twice as hard?"

Brendon swallows and lowers his hand. "Is that why you didn't want to do this today?"

Spencer fidgets a bit. "It's the reason I don't want to do it every day." He looks completely shocked that he said that out loud, and then he adds, "Fuck. I shouldn't have said that. I should just--"

He makes an abortive attempt to stand, but Brendon stops him with a hand on his arm. "Spence," he says, and his breath catches on the word. He clears his throat and continues, "First of all, this is your room. And second," and then he leans forward, bracing himself on Spencer's arm, and kisses him.

Spencer makes a surprised noise against Brendon's lips, then sighs and slides his hand into Brendon's hair as the kiss continues. Brendon can't help thinking about how different Spencer kisses compared to Ryan. Ryan's kisses are quick and dirty, compromising nothing and making Brendon lose control way too fast. But Spencer, wow, Spencer is slow and calculated, making Brendon feel warm all over but still managing to make the kiss suggestive enough to have Brendon squirming. Brendon nudges Spencer's shoulder, and Spencer shifts willingly so that they're both laying across the bed with Brendon mostly on top of him.

"Are you sure about this?" Spencer asks, and Brendon revels in how breathless and perfect he sounds.

Brendon has never been more sure about anything, but with Spencer's mouth right there - fuck, he loves kissing so much - he can't possibly stand to waste time talking.

Yes, he says instead, pouring enough feeling into the single thought that it feels like a release when he pushes it into Spencer's head.

Spencer moans and arches against him, pulling Brendon's hips down as he deepens their kiss. "Fuck," he says shakily in the one second Brendon pulls away to settle over his lap more comfortably.

"If you're not sure," Brendon mumbles, almost indistinguishable as he doesn't quite pull away from Spencer's mouth, "now would probably be a good time," and damn, does Spencer always taste this good? "to say something."

Instead of answering, Spencer slides his hands over Brendon's hips and around to slide them into Brendon's back pockets, and then he pulls Brendon flush against him.

"Nn," Brendon moans helplessly as Spencer rubs against him just right. "So we're really doing this?"

"What kind of dumbass question is that?" Spencer asks, laughing, and Brendon's breath catches at the sight of Spencer all flushed and amused. Spencer squeezes Brendon's ass through his pants as he pushes his hips up toward Brendon's, and Brendon has to close his eyes at how good it feels.

"Okay, yeah, we're doing this, I know we are," he says, "but mostly I wanted to know for sure if I had permission to suck you off."

Spencer swallows thickly and, staring at Brendon's mouth, he nods.

Brendon beams down at him, shifting so that he can get his hands at Spencer's zipper while he mouths at Spencer's throat. As soon as he gets a hand wrapped around Spencer's cock, Spencer pushes his hips forward and makes a pleading noise that thrums inside Brendon's body.

Brendon doesn't waste his time teasing after that. He moves back on the bed, pulling at the hem of Spencer's pants, and then takes him into his mouth. Spencer starts to say, "oh," but then draws it out when Brendon moves. It's been a while since he's done this - too long in his opinion - but he takes his cues from Spencer on how fast to move, and he makes an encouraging noise when Spencer tentatively threads his fingers through his hair. He moves his hand from Spencer's hip when he can't stand the thought of not being touched any longer, and he gets his hand wrapped around his erection just in time for Spencer to say, Your mouth is more perfect than I imagined it would be. The tone of it is filled with so much want that Brendon has to squeeze himself to keep from coming right there, and he pulls off long enough to catch Spencer's eye.

"Sorry, I--"

"I want you to fuck my mouth," Brendon says, getting straight to the point.

Spencer's eyes seem permanently wide, but Brendon's pretty sure it's in a good way, so he moves around until he's in a better position and sucks the head of Spencer's cock into his mouth without waiting for an answer. He opens his throat and urges Spencer forward, moaning in approval when Spencer pushes deep and pulls back out, gathering a rhythm. Spencer continues to make noises that Brendon couldn't even have imagined, and Brendon moves his hand over his own erection in erratic movements that match up closely with Spencer's thrusts. Spencer's hand tightens in Brendon's hair as he gets close, and Brendon sends an encouraging thought just in time for Spencer to push in fully and come down Brendon's throat. Spencer moans his name, stretching out the vowels, then collapses in a boneless heap on the bed.

Brendon can't catch his breath, but he's not too concerned, focusing mainly on the movement of his hand until finally, he pulls himself over the edge and comes, not taking his eyes off of Spencer.

"C'mere," Spencer mumbles, reaching for Brendon. Brendon hesitates for a moment before wiping his hand clean on his pants. He can't bring himself to care about the mess at the moment.

Brendon settles against Spencer's side on the bed, and Spencer tilts his head to give him an enthusiastic kiss.

"Mm," Brendon hums against Spencer's mouth. "I thought you might like that."

"Yeah, because you stalked me in my mind," Spencer accuses with a shit-eating grin on his face.

Brendon shoves at his shoulder but then negates the motion by snuggling closer. "I gave you plenty of warning before I did it, asshole."

"Uh huh," Spencer answers, ignoring him. He leans in and sucks a mark onto Brendon's neck, making him squirm. His laugh vibrates across Brendon's skin, and Brendon loves the fact that post-coital Spencer is so happy and tactile. He hopes that's always the case. "I'll make it up to you next time," he murmurs against Brendon's ear, and Brendon shivers involuntarily.

"Yeah?" he says. He didn't assume there would be a next time, but his heart jumps in his chest to know that Spencer believes there will be.

"Promise," Spencer whispers. His hand slides along Brendon's back and pushes up the material of his shirt. "Less clothes next time."

"Definitely," Brendon agrees instantly. He kind of wants to express his vote for less clothes now, but Spencer looks about three seconds away from falling asleep, so he keeps his mouth shut. It can wait.

******

Brendon wakes up groggily in the middle of the night to Spencer stretching awkwardly over him. "Spence?" he says, squinting against the light of the panel.

"Sorry, I was just--it got too hot. I'm trying to adjust the temperature."

Brendon can admit to that; he's burning up. He slides out of the way so Spencer can get at the computer, but as he stands, he pulls his shirt off and throws it on the floor. He's busy shimmying out of his pants when he notices Spencer staring, and the walls subtly change hue as the cooling system switches on. "What?"

"Nothing, just. Enjoying the view," Spencer says with a smug smile.

Brendon grins appreciatively, and despite his sleepy state, he's totally awake enough to insist on equality. "I think, to be fair," he begins, crawling on top of Spencer and fingering the hem of his shirt, "the least you could do is ditch your shirt."

"I don't owe you anything," Spencer teases, and Brendon bites at his sleepy smile.

"Hey, you're the one that said he was hot. Unless," Brendon smiles mischievously, "you meant the other kind of hot. But I can help with that, too."

Spencer brings his hand up so that Brendon thinks he's reaching for him, but instead he covers his mouth as he yawns hugely. Brendon laughs at that at first, until of course it makes him yawn too, and Spencer grins up at him, looking proud of himself. "Maybe tomorrow," Spencer suggests, squinting at Brendon in the relative darkness as the light from the panel fades out.

"No way, Spencer Smith. You lose this shirt or I'm going back to my own room."

"I don't believe that for a second."

Brendon pushes back onto his knees, but he doesn't get very far before Spencer grabs at his arm and pulls him back down.

"Alright, fine," Spencer says, yanking his shirt off and nearly smacking Brendon in the face in the process. Brendon 'accidentally' brushes his hand against the wall panel to light it up as Spencer tosses the shirt away so that he won't miss out. He gets an eye roll for his efforts, and Spencer pulls him down for another kiss.

"Go to bed, Brendon," Spencer says, and any worries Brendon might have had about the morning after vanish as Spencer's arm wraps around his waist.

******

Brendon oversleeps the next day. He has a vague memory of Spencer telling him to go back to sleep, but he definitely should not have slept so long after that. Feeling guilty, he rushes to grab his clothes and throw them in the laundry, then darts out to take a shower. As he wakes up fully under the warm spray, he realizes with a smile that it doesn't really matter how late he slept. Mostly because he gets his work done in a fraction of the time most people would, but also because the only person that he'd normally worry about reprimanding him was the one who told him to go back to sleep in the first place.

"Nice of you to join us," Ryan says when Brendon steps off the elevator.

Did you tell them? Brendon immediately asks Spencer, even while Ryan is speaking.

Just Ryan, Spencer answers immediately, not turning around. Brendon can hear his smile.

"Yeah," Brendon tells Ryan. "I had this really amazing night's sleep, you know?" He turns to look for Jon, discovering him already smirking back at him with knowledge behind his eyes. Ryan just makes an exasperated noise and ignores Brendon, but Brendon feels obligated to tell Jon, even if Ryan has clearly already passed on the information to him.

"Hey," Jon says, clapping him on the shoulder once he crosses the cargo deck. "Good night?"

"The best," Brendon says quietly, smiling at the memory. The sex was great, and he's definitely remembering the awesome sex, but what his mind keeps repeating is the promise that there would be a next time, that the middle of the night practically cemented it. "I think Spencer and I are together now."

"You think?" Jon asks, amused.

"Yes, I think," he says, wanting to add I'm not a mind reader, but unwilling to tell the blatant lie. I'm not breaking my promise about reading minds doesn't have the same ring. "We're definitely something, I just don't know what yet."

Brendon punches in his password on the nearby wall panel, but he can feel Jon's eyes on him. "Why are you staring at me?" he asks without looking over at Jon.

"I'm just wondering why you're not doing cartwheels right now."

Brendon chances a look behind him and discovers Spencer staring back at him. Their eyes meet and Brendon beams, fucking hell, he can't help it. Spencer smiles back on reflex, ducking his head and going back to his work, but Brendon turns back to the panel, satisfied. "I don't need to," he tells Jon.

"Oh, sure," Jon says, though his voice falls a bit flat. When Brendon glances over, Jon is looking across the deck, not at Spencer as Brendon expected, but at Ryan. He's working diligently, but he doesn't look happy.

Brendon raises his eyebrows at Jon, whose only answer is an easy-going smile. Brendon is in no place to give relationship advice, especially given his now inconvenient feelings for both of them, but he'd much rather Jon and Ryan be with each other than have them find other people.

Most days, Brendon is content with his daily tasks, but today he is completely bored with just being the secretary. Sure, some days they give him something that's actually a challenge, but most of the time his job is entirely redundant, and he still wonders why they felt the need to hire someone. They hadn't expected him to be able to unlock the coded files in the beginning, but they definitely didn't need anyone to remind them of their own daily obligations. He still feels awkward giving each of them their updates every night, especially with Ryan, who looks back at him as if to say, 'I know that already, dumbass.'

The day drags on, and once Spencer goes upstairs to talk to his boss (and oh, Brendon has never been quite so annoyed about that), he finally gives up and heads back to his room to listen to music. Normally, he'd work with Ryan for most of the afternoon, giving him a hard time about his weak-ass box sorting, but Ryan is in such a virulent mood that Brendon decides not to deal with it.

He's still lying there, lost in thought and halfway drifting off, when Spencer knocks on the connecting door. Brendon works on waking himself up enough to answer, but Spencer opens the door before he can say anything.

"Hey, you," Brendon mumbles, easy smile flitting across his face.

Spencer wastes no time, straddling Brendon on the bed and beginning to pull the buttons of Brendon's shirt loose. "Hey yourself," he says, methodically pulling off Brendon's shirt. "Some of us had to work all day while you were lazing about upstairs doing whatever you liked."

Brendon decides this is the best way to wake up, even if he wasn't all the way asleep. "I might've been 'lazing about,' but I assure you I wasn't doing whatever I liked," he says, staring hard into Spencer's eyes.

Spencer frees the last button and glances up at Brendon right as he says this, and then Brendon is treated to a version of Spencer's smile that he's never quite seen before. Something close, maybe, but there's something about this smile that's sexy and sweet at the same time.

Brendon follows Spencer's guidance and allows him to pull the shirt off of him. He opens his mouth to complain about equality again, but Spencer is apparently one step ahead of him, pulling his own shirt off as quickly as possible. "I'm not exactly complaining, but do I have to do any of the work here?" Brendon teases, smirking up at Spencer.

Spencer casts his shirt aside, hair sticking up comically, and without answering, he leans down and presses his mouth firmly against Brendon's. Brendon kisses back sweetly for a moment, just because he knows he can, but then in a moment Spencer completely changes it up. At first he just slips his tongue into Brendon's mouth, but as soon as Brendon begins to respond, he pushes back, then moves again, and Brendon's moan is unearthly when he realizes Spencer is fucking his mouth with his tongue. Spencer hasn't even touched him yet, and already he's straining against the zipper of his jeans.

When Spencer does finally ask, "What do you want?" Brendon can't think of anything but getting his damn jeans off. He goes for his own zipper, but Spencer bats his hands away. He takes off Brendon's pants in that same methodical way, getting a steady grip on Brendon's cock before he says, "I'm serious. Tell me what you want."

His thoughts want to stray toward the 'just keep touching me' variety, but as soon as he gets this mental image, he knows immediately that that's what he wants. He pushes the image into Spencer's mind, no words necessary, and he can tell by Spencer's weakening restraint that he got the message.

"Fuck, Brendon," and his voice is as breathless as Brendon hoped it might be. "As if it's not hot enough for you to say 'fuck me' like a normal person, you've gotta mess with my mind like that?"

"A picture is worth a thousand--"

"Don't."

Brendon smiles. Spencer rolls his eyes, but he's smiling too. "Where--?" he starts to ask, and Brendon points toward his bedside drawer.

After Spencer's got one finger inside, Brendon starts to talk; he can't help it. "God, I always wondered what this would be like. With you."

"You did?" Spencer asks, and Brendon thinks he sounds surprised but it's hard to tell over the rushing in his ears.

"Yes," Brendon answers, squirming as Spencer pushes in a second finger. "It's all I could think about some nights."

Spencer moves his fingers in and out, going in at just the right angle and making Brendon arch off the bed. "I didn't. Think about it, I mean," Spencer says in a serious tone.

The disappointment Brendon would have felt in any other situation upon hearing that hits him briefly, but all he can think now is that he's grateful for whatever happened to change Spencer's mind about him.

"Not that I didn't want it," Spencer clarifies, and Brendon's heart trips and backpedals over that last thought. "I just... I was afraid to think about it. I thought if I did, you might hear."

Brendon has no idea if it's on purpose, but Spencer chooses that moment to push a third finger inside. Brendon utters a string of curse words in the cadence of a moan, pushing against Spencer's fingers and begging him to get on with it already. The thought of Spencer sitting next door, jerking off and trying not to think about him is just too much for him to process right now.

"Do you mind staying on your back?" Spencer asks, finally starting to sound like he's affected by this too. "I want to see you."

"Yeah, just," Brendon shudders. "Hurry."

After several agonizing seconds, Spencer starts to slide in. Brendon grabs at the sheets, trying not to make a lot of noise. It's been a while, but the pain mixes in with pleasure so fast that he can't even stop to think about it. There is a stinging moment when Spencer pushes in fully, and Brendon hisses reflexively. "Hey," Spencer says, reaching out to smooth Brendon's hair. "You alright?"

Brendon nods by default, but Spencer still gives him time to adjust. He concentrates on Spencer's erratic breathing, in, out, in, and how is everything Spencer does so hot? He breathes out slowly through his nose and then looks Spencer dead in the eye. "Move," he says, more permission than command.

He does move, and after the first couple of thrusts, his hips shift just slightly and Brendon feels a burst of pleasure.

Do that again, Brendon says, though he's not sure if Spencer can hear it over the noises coming out of his mouth.

"God, Brendon," Spencer says, reverent. Brendon smiles, has to, because that look on Spencer's face is real and he put it there.

Spencer smiles and shakes his head as if he can't quite believe Brendon is real, and boy does Brendon know that feeling. He stops his sure movements long enough to lean forward, bending Brendon practically in half, and kiss him for a long moment.

"You just did that to shut me up," Brendon pants.

"You'll never know," Spencer says, smiling. In the next second, Spencer is moving again and the moment has passed, but it's one Brendon remembers for a long time after.

Brendon wraps his hand around his dick and matches his movements to Spencer's thrusts, and god, he never thought to hope for this. Spencer speeds up, and Brendon starts babbling, knowing that they're both close, and everything washes over Brendon all at once. He's not sure who comes first; he just knows that when he catches his breath, Spencer is still and staring at him, breathing just as unevenly.

Eventually, Spencer moves away, but not before saying, "Stay here."

Brendon starts to say, 'Where would I go?' but he's not really in the mood to be a smart-ass. Spencer returns with a cloth that he uses to clean Brendon off, and to Brendon's happy surprise, he slides back into bed next to Brendon once he's done. "Aren't we gonna eat dinner?" Brendon asks, amused, but he's totally willing to skip a meal for this.

"Dinner's not for at least half an hour," Spencer reasons, moving in to kiss Brendon.

Brendon smiles into the kiss, before opening his mouth to deepen it. They make out lazily for a while without a care in the world. Brendon has a momentary flash of thought, I can't believe this is real, followed by a paranoid feeling that something is going to go wrong, but he pushes the fear down so quickly it's easily forgotten.

"You're falling asleep," Brendon says with a laugh. There's no denying it; Spencer doesn't even open his eyes when Brendon pulls away.

"Shut up," Spencer mumbles, smiling and snuggling closer to Brendon.

"I am not that boring of a kisser."

"The evidence says otherwise," Spencer says, now focusing his attention on Brendon's collarbone.

"I bet it wouldn't if we asked Ryan," Brendon says. Shit. He really needs to learn to filter his thoughts before he speaks them out loud.

Spencer doesn't seem too bothered, though. "I don't think that counts. Ryan's a pretty dominant kisser; it wouldn't be an accurate measure of your skill."

Brendon wants to ask if Spencer knows from personal experience, because wow, but. Brain-mouth filter. "He's mad at me," he says instead.

Spencer rolls his eyes. "He'll get over it."

Brendon really hopes so. "Is there anything I can do to make it better?" he asks cautiously. He's not sure when his window on Talking About Ryan is going to run out, but he's not sure what Ryan's even mad about, and Spencer would know.

"Stay out of his way," Spencer advises, but it comes out as a mumble and takes Brendon a second to decipher.

"Jeez, just go to sleep already," Brendon says, laughing.

Spencer hums happily. "Do you mind?"

Brendon leans forward to kiss Spencer one more time. He can't believe that Spencer doesn't realize how crazy Brendon is about him. "No, I don't mind."

After a few seconds of staring at the blissful look on Spencer's face, Brendon reminds himself that it's creepy to watch people sleep, and closes his eyes.

******

The next few weeks and the accompanying stops go quickly for Brendon. Ryan gets over whatever is bothering him - Spencer was right about staying out of his way - and Brendon gets to go to sleep every night with Spencer Smith by his side. The only drawback is--

"Come on, Brendon. It's been like three weeks."

"That's a lie!" Brendon protests. "We did it last week."

"Yeah, for like 5 minutes. You know that's not enough for me!"

"But think of all the other things we could be doing!" Brendon whines, sliding his hand beneath the hem of Spencer's shirt to prove a point.

Spencer breathes out slowly through his nose, usually a sign of Brendon's imminent victory. Brendon skims his hand over Spencer's skin and then down to trace the line of Spencer's hipbone down to his low-slung jeans. Spencer bites his lip, and Brendon smiles at his accomplishment, but then Spencer says, "I just really want to improve."

"Fine," Brendon says, sighing. Then suddenly, he has an idea. Beaming, he asks, "Can we make out while we do it?"

Spencer looks reluctant, but Brendon keeps his fingers moving steadily on Spencer's skin, and he finally says, "Yeah, okay."

Brendon does a little fist-pump of celebration and pulls off his shirt. When he hops onto the bed and looks up at Spencer, he's shaking his head and obviously trying not to laugh. "What?" Brendon says.

"Nothing, just." He eases onto the bed next to Brendon and looks him in the eye. "Just you, I guess."

Brendon gives Spencer his best proud smile before going in for the first kiss.

"Hang on," Spencer says, laughing. "You're the coach here, dumbass. If we're gonna actually get any work done, you're gonna have to tell me what to do."

"I like the way you say that," Brendon says, waggling his eyebrows. Spencer smacks him on the shoulder for good measure, but it's still worth it. "Alright. Uh, why don't you try reading my mind again? I know it didn't work last time, and I freaked you out the time before that, but that was before..." he gestures between the two of them, unsure how to put it into words.

"You didn't freak me out," Spencer says softly, throwing Brendon off.

Brendon rolls his eyes. "You caught me out right when I was thinking about how dreamy your eyes were, and then you all but ran out the door. It doesn't take a mind reader, et cetera."

"Shut up," Spencer says, letting out a short disbelieving laugh. "I didn't know for sure what I'd heard, and at the time, you were my coworker, teacher, and my friend. Excuse me for not wanting to screw that up."

Brendon rolls his eyes. "But it wouldn't have screwed it up. Don't tell me I was subtle about my major crush on you."

"You're the mind reader here, not me," Spencer complains.

"Not for long, Spencer Smith," Brendon says, pulling Spencer in for a kiss again. This time, Spencer moves forward willingly, returning the kiss slowly and sweetly. Brendon carefully focuses on lowering his defenses so that Spencer can read his thoughts, then, even as they kiss, says, Mind's wide open whenever you're ready.

Spencer laughs lightly against Brendon's mouth. "You're unbelievable, you know that?"

"I choose to take that as a compliment," Brendon replies, then moves toward Spencer again. He tries not to think too much about his vulnerable state, but it leaves him feeling unsettled, like he showed up at a delivery without clothes on but only just realized it.

As soon as Brendon realizes he's being a very boring kisser, though, he stops worrying about it and focuses on Spencer. He skips all other pretense and pushes his tongue into Spencer's mouth. He's rewarded immediately with a quiet sound not unlike a moan, followed quickly by Spencer's hands on his hips as he shifts to be on top of Brendon. Spencer keeps touching Brendon all over, and Brendon is busy focusing on where else Spencer's hands might roam when he feels the intrusion of Spencer's mind into his own. He fights against the automatic defense and finds it easier to let Spencer in this time around. He's not sure if that's because Spencer has started making obscene noises and grinding down against him, but it's definitely not hurting.

"Take off your pants," Spencer demands, shifting back just long enough to pull his shirt off and throw it away. Brendon has no issue with this, but Spencer loses patience and helps Brendon with the process. With some skill previously unknown to Brendon, Spencer manages to lose his pants in record time without their mouths ever parting, and then there is that first beautiful moment when their cocks slide together without anything to get in the way.

Brendon clings to Spencer and moves against him, kissing him messily and desperately. Spencer pulls out of the kiss with an obscene smack and licks deliberately across his palm, staring Brendon in the eye, before reaching between them. His grip isn't perfect, but Brendon has no problem helping out, and within moments they are moving at a rhythm just a touch slower than Brendon's frantic heartbeat. Between that blessed friction and Spencer's filthy kissing, it's not long before Brendon is uttering a string of curses and coming so hard his vision blurs.

"Okay, so wow," Brendon says when they're both lying there trying to catch their breath.

"Yeah," Spencer agrees. "I had no idea you had a thing for hands."

"I don't have a thing for hands," Brendon protests, though it doesn't hold much merit given what just happened. "I just had a thing for your hands when you happened to figure out how to get inside my head."

"Either way," Spencer says, and he's got a point. "Maybe you should let me read your mind more often," he says, tone only halfway joking.

"I can filter you in. Make it so you can read my mind anytime, no limits, without me being vulnerable to anyone else," Brendon admits, biting his lip and staring up at the ceiling.

He can hear Spencer shifting onto his side to look at him, but Brendon doesn't turn to meet his eyes. "Why would you do that?" Spencer asks.

Because I trust you, Brendon says, because saying it out loud doesn't seem like enough. He counts out three seconds in his head before he turns to meet Spencer's gaze, which is intent back on him.

"I won't ever do it unless you give me permission," Spencer says.

"This is your permission," Brendon counters, starting to feel uncomfortable. If Spencer doesn't want this, if he just stepped over some line--

"I know, but I'm not going to do anything you wouldn't do," Spencer says, sure of himself. "You can read my mind no matter what, but you've only done it a handful of times when I knew it was coming. You told me there are people like us who don't treat their abilities right, people you would never trust, and I don't want to be one of those people."

"Just don't go snooping through my thoughts while I'm asleep, and we'll be okay," Brendon says with a smile.

"Deal."

******

At their next stop, Brendon is looking forward to helping out with the deliveries. Ever since he and Spencer started hooking up, Brendon feels like he never gets to spend time with Jon, which is just unacceptable. What Brendon doesn't expect is to find Jon dressed and ready to go as he stumbles into the kitchen, bleary-eyed and yawning, in search of breakfast.

"Since when are you a morning person?" Brendon mumbles as he reaches into the cabinet.

Jon shrugs. "Just looking forward to today, I guess."

Brendon smiles to himself at that. Jon probably doesn't mean hanging out with him, but... well, what else could he mean? Deliveries are never that exciting - well, unless you get bottles thrown at you, but that's not the good sort of exciting. "Well, why don't I grab something I can eat on the way so that we can get going?"

Jon smiles and wraps Brendon up in a huge hug. "No hurry, dude. Our pickup time isn't gonna change."

Brendon hums and allows himself to lean against Jon. He can usually sense when Jon enters a room because even without listening, his thoughts give off a serene vibe. It's so comforting.

"Waking up is suggested, though," Jon murmurs right up against Brendon's neck so that Brendon can feel the words vibrating.

"Five more minutes," he teases, languishing in the hug for a few more seconds before convincing himself to pull away.

Even after Jon's assurance, Brendon still feels the need to rush through breakfast, and he's just finishing up when Spencer stumbles into the kitchen. He blinks at the two of them for a moment, looks behind himself into the common area, then back at them.

"Yeah, yeah. We're up early," Brendon quips, shooting Spencer a fond smile.

"I'm just wondering why today is opposite day," Spencer says. Despite his talk, he's obviously more ready for the day than Brendon, who hasn't bothered to change into his usual delivery clothes. As Spencer settles in the seat next to Brendon, he presses one lingering kiss against Brendon's lips.

Brendon pulls away with the slight taste of Spencer's mouthwash on his lips, only to notice that Spencer is looking at Jon instead of back at him. What's Jon so giddy about? Spencer asks, turning to his breakfast.

He says it's just a good mood, Brendon replies. He carefully puts away all of his dishes as he contemplates the matter. Think there's something up?

"What's with the huge smile, Walker?" Spencer asks, presumably to dig deeper.

"I dunno," Jon says unconvincingly. "Ever just wake up and know that you're gonna have a good day?"

Spencer shrugs. "Sure, I guess." To Brendon, he says, Could be something. Nothing bad though.

"C'mon," Brendon says to Jon. "Let's go start that good day."

The rest of the day passes in a happy blur, and Brendon has a bounce in his step by the time all the work is done. He's pretty sure Jon's good mood is contagious.

"D'you mind if we go back to the ship?" Jon asks as they head out after their last delivery.

"Fine with me," Brendon says, shrugging. "Why? Don't feel like going to the bar tonight?"

"Oh, no. I just wanna change before heading out."

This confuses Brendon, because Jon is never one to care about what he's wearing, especially to the bar, but he doesn't argue.

He figures that maybe Jon is onto something though, and since he's there, he might as well change too. He finds a red button-up that he knows Spencer likes on him and changes out his work shirt for it. He goes back out to wait for Jon, and then blinks in surprise when Jon comes out of his room.

"Um," he says.

Jon looks a bit sheepish, but he doesn't actually respond. He's gonna make Brendon say it.

"Is there a reason you came all the way back just to change into a shirt with a huge stain on it?"

"It's good luck," Jon says automatically, looking past Brendon and heading for the elevator. Brendon isn't sure if he believes in things being good luck, but he's in favor of anything that makes Jon smile so much.

"Whatever you say, man," Brendon answers with a smile. "Hey, isn't this the same bar you got falling-down drunk at last time?"

Jon actually giggles. Brendon stares at him in wonder, unsure exactly what's gotten into him. "Yeah, I was a little confused about things last time we were here. Sorry if I did anything weird that night? I don't exactly remember the details."

Brendon shakes his head, laughing to himself. "You are a wonder, Jon Walker."

"I try to keep the mystery alive," Jon quips, pulling Brendon into a side hug. "I promise not to get falling-down drunk tonight, even if things aren't as awesome as I hope they'll be."

Now Brendon knows there's something bigger going on, but he doesn't have it in him to pry. "That was a while ago anyway," Brendon says. "Now you've got your bestest best friend - and I'm a lot better than 5 shots of Jack, right?"

A smile spreads over Jon's face, slow and sure, and Brendon swears that Jon gives him a once-over briefly before making eye contact again. That and the way Jon mumbles, "Of course," make Brendon swallow and look away.

The moment blows over, though, and they walk to the bar with friendly conversation. Jon asks how things are with Spencer, and Brendon tries not to get too giddy or give out what Spencer insists is private information. He's just bad at filtering, okay? It's not a big deal anyway, it's just Jon, and Jon doesn't seem uncomfortable hearing about every detail of Brendon's relationship.

Once they get to the bar, Brendon decides he's not gonna abandon Ryan and Jon this time. Tonight, they can all hang out together.

"It's about time you two got here," Ryan complains, approaching them almost as soon as they get inside. "What did--" He cuts himself off, eyes trained on the obvious stain on Jon's shirt. "Jon. I thought you told me you were gonna clean that shirt."

"I tried," Jon says, but the shit-eating grin on his face says otherwise. "It just wouldn't cooperate."

Ryan heaves a put-upon sigh and reaches for Jon's hand. "Come on, I can fix this," he says, pulling Jon toward the bathrooms. "Spencer's in one of the booths!" he shouts at Brendon, waving in a vague right-hand direction.

"See ya, Bren!" Jon says with that same excited tone. Brendon isn't sure what just happened, but he has a feeling Jon might have maybe planned it. He shrugs and goes to find Spencer.

"So the weirdest thing just happened," he says as soon as he's within shouting distance of Spencer. "Oh! Sorry," he adds when he sees Pete sitting opposite Spencer, obviously mid-sentence.

Pete is completely oblivious to Brendon's interruption, though, and keeps on talking with wild gestures. Brendon has no idea what he's talking about and quickly loses interest. At the bar, he meets up with Patrick, who engages him in conversation about the quality of the old music that never gets played anymore.

"It's just, there's so much good stuff from over a century ago, but how can you convince people to listen when they can't even imagine being alive back then?"

Brendon nods enthusiastically. "And if you listen to stuff from a long time ago, it's like so much new music since then is a bad copy of it."

"Exactly!" Patrick says emphatically, gesturing wildly. "There are only so many combinations of notes, I guess, but the quality of music was just so much higher back in the day. Quality!"

Brendon smiles when it dawns on him that Patrick is already pretty tipsy. The bartender asks him then if he wants anything to drink. Brendon looks back at Spencer, who doesn't have anything, and decides to pass for tonight. Maybe Spencer has other plans.

"Let's go break up the business talk," Patrick mumbles, grabbing Brendon by the arm and leading him back to Spencer and Pete's booth.

Patrick slides effortlessly into the space beside Pete, who pulls Patrick in instantly. Brendon can't help but pout when he looks at them, especially when Spencer continues his statement and completely ignores Brendon even as he sits unnaturally close to Spencer on the bench.

Patrick joins in on the conversation Pete and Spencer already started, and Brendon still has no idea what they're talking about. He sends the confusion he feels over to Spencer, who places his hand on Brendon's knee - some acknowledgment, at least - and smiles at him. He doesn't answer or explain, though.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom," Brendon finally says when Pete and Patrick pause to speak to each other.

"Okay. Hey," Spencer says, grabbing for Brendon's hand and pulling him down again. He pulls Brendon into a kiss, slow and sweet but still too brief for Brendon's taste. He half-expects Pete to be staring or making some scene about them, but when he looks, Pete is still completely engrossed in conversation with Patrick. Huh.

He pushes himself out of the booth to head for the bathroom, but he gets stopped briefly a couple of times saying hello to friends. When he does reach the door to the men's room, he's still smiling his polite smile from saying hi to William, and that's when he sees them.

Brendon takes in everything at once because he's not sure what to focus on first. There's Jon, shirtless, pushed up against the sink by Ryan, and their mouths are connected like it's the end of the world. There's Jon's hands, gripping Ryan's hips, and Ryan's hands, sliding down to the button of Jon's jeans even as Brendon blinks in surprise. There's Jon's lucky shirt, forgotten in the sink, and above all else there are the muffled noises as they make out that Brendon will surely have stuck in his head for days.

Brendon is able to enjoy the scene for 10, maybe 15 seconds before his face heats up, and he immediately feels guilty for watching when they obviously don't know he's there. He clears his throat loudly and says, "Not that I'm not cheering for you guys, but uh, you might wanna lock the door. It might not be me next time."

At first, they seem unperturbed by Brendon's presence, but they pull away right as Brendon finishes his last statement. They stare at each other with a look so intense that Brendon can practically feel it, and then almost in unison, they turn to him with that same look in their eyes. Brendon swallows, taking in Jon's dark eyes and swollen lips, then the same wrecked look on Ryan that he's seen once before. "Just sayin'," he says weakly, then pushes his way back out of the bathroom. He leans against the wall there for a brief moment, trying to knock himself out of it and breathe like a normal person.

When he's satisfied that he no longer looks like he's just been ravished (and Spencer always teases him about looking that way before he even touches him), he walks back to the main part of the bar to find Spencer. He doesn't find him at the booth, where Pete and Patrick are now deep in conversation with each other.

"There you are," he hears Spencer say from behind him, and then Spencer surprises him by pulling him onto the dance floor.

"Hi," Brendon says as soon as he faces Spencer, and he decides not to waste any of this nervous energy. He presses obscenely close to Spencer, who makes a surprised, then happy noise at the attention while they dance. "I missed you," he whispers millimeters away from Spencer's mouth, allowing Spencer to close the distance.

He does close the distance, humming his agreement into Brendon's mouth as they move to the beat of the song. "I could've used you there today," Spencer says when they break to catch their breath. "Ryan was bitching about Jon all day. I never really figured out what the problem was there."

"They're hooking up in the bathroom right now," Brendon explains before pushing his hips forward and pulling Spencer toward him simultaneously.

"What?" Spencer says, completely surprised, but then cuts off the end of his question with a not-quite-concealed moan as Brendon moves against him.

"Yeah," Brendon says, a little breathless himself, "I pretty much walked in on them. Hopefully they locked the door this time, but I have no idea with those two."

"Are you serious?" Spencer asks, seeming concerned even though his hands keep pulling insistently on Brendon's hips.

Brendon nods, biting his lip as Spencer grinds against him. The song stops way too abruptly and is replaced by something slow and torturous. "We should go back to the ship," Brendon suggests.

Spencer nods, and Brendon is happy to note that he's not the only one breathing heavily.

The crisp air outside is sobering; they weren't even drinking, but it's still the same feeling. Brendon is satisfied to cling to Spencer's hand and wait until they get back to the confines of the ship to jump his bones.

"I can't believe he didn't tell me," Spencer mutters, mostly to himself.

Brendon makes a sympathetic noise and squeezes Spencer's hand. "Jon didn't say anything to me," he points out, for what it's worth.

"I should have known. If I'd been paying more attention..."

Brendon doesn't respond. He knows they've both been ignoring Ryan and Jon more since they got together. He doesn't want to break up, but he would like it if they could hang out as a group more often. He gives Spencer the silence he needs until the get into the ship, across the cargo deck, into and out of the elevator, into his room.

As if on cue, Spencer shakes his head and smiles slyly at Brendon. "I hope you plan to make good on those promises your hips were making."

Brendon makes a face at the cheesiness of that, especially coming from Spencer. "That sounds like something I would say," Brendon points out with a laugh.

Spencer pauses, seeming to reflect on his words, and then makes a horrified face. "It does."

"Maybe we have been spending too much time together," Brendon says, and they're both laughing.

As their laughter dies out, Spencer schools his features into a serious expression. "We'll do better from now on," he says confidently.

Brendon shrugs. "Unless... I mean, if this is more than a one-time thing, they might start shutting us out like we did to them," he points out.

Spencer nods, thinking it over. "I guess we kinda deserve that."

Brendon rolls his eyes and pulls at Spencer's shirt. "Now what was that thing about my hips?"

******

Brendon doesn't see Jon the next day until lunchtime. Spencer is off working with the captain, and Brendon is killing some time by playing a game on the kitchen's monitor. He doesn't hear Jon coming but he perks up instantly when he hears him murmur, "G'morning," and open the cabinet.

Brendon whirls around, giving Jon his biggest smile and pouncing on him with a hug. "Jon Walker," he says when he sees Jon's triumphant grin, "you have to tell me everything."

Jon raises his eyebrows. "Everything?"

"Yes," Brendon insists. "I can't believe that lucky shirt thing worked!"

Jon ducks his head and laughs. "Well I wasn't actually wearing the shirt the whole time, you know."

"Did you guys hook up in the bathroom?" Brendon asks eagerly.

"What?" Jon laughs harder, eyes sparkling. "Spencer won't let you give me details, why shouldn't I do the same to you?"

"Aw, c'mon, I just wanna know. Did you lock the door after I left?"

Jon studies Brendon's expression for a few seconds, and Brendon tries not to feel self-conscious. Finally, he says, "There wasn't a lock on the door." He pauses again, but Brendon waits patiently. Well, as patiently as he can. "So Ryan decided I should lean up against it to keep it shut."

Brendon's mouth falls open of its own accord. He hadn't really expected Jon to give any details, but the instant image springs up fully formed in his mind. Jon smirks at him, and Brendon is seconds away from asking more when the door to the bathroom slides open and Ryan walks out, shirtless and still soaking wet. Ryan doesn't look at either of them, even though they're both watching, but instead walks straight into his room.

"I'll tell you the rest later," Jon says solemnly, winking.

"Are you two...?" Brendon begins quietly, not sure how to end the sentence without sounding like an idiot.

"Yeah, sort of," Jon says. "We're not completely exclusive, but--"

"Why not?" Brendon asks.

Jon shrugs and meets Brendon's gaze as he says, "We're just open to other things, y'know?"

Brendon doesn't know why that makes him want to squirm, but it does. "Sure, I guess."

A million more questions come to Brendon's mind, but he refrains from asking them now that Ryan could walk in at any moment. The permission that Jon seems to have given him is exciting, and he definitely intends to use it in the future.

******

Time passes. Jon does actually share some details with Brendon, but he starts to ask for details in return. Brendon's pretty sure he's allowed to confide in his best friend, and he's definitely sure he can trust Jon, but he still occasionally feels guilty. And if he dwells on the details Jon chooses to share a little too much in his free time, well, that's nobody's business but his own.

Remarkably, the four of them do find more time to hang out after Jon and Ryan start hooking up regularly. It's almost as if Brendon and Spencer are on the same schedule as Jon and Ryan, and whenever Brendon and Spencer decide to take some time for themselves, so do Jon and Ryan. What Brendon doesn't get is why, other than that first accidental moment in the bathroom, he's never seen Jon and Ryan touch each other more than casually, not even a kiss. He knows that Jon is comfortable with kissing, anywhere and anytime, and he expected that Ryan would be in favor of kissing just as much. When he realizes this argument is maybe just wishful thinking on his part, though, he decides not to bring it up to Jon.

Brendon keeps working with Spencer on his ability, but he's got to admit that he's mostly to blame when their attempts to work turn into makeout sessions and sometimes more than that. Despite all the progress he's made, Spencer's still not very good with his control during sex, and he sometimes sends messages to Brendon. Brendon knows this is normal, because he'd done it to his fair share of classmates when he was young and new at this. They weren't all so understanding. Lucky for Spencer, Brendon gets off on the unbidden thoughts that Spencer has to let him hear, and it's never a problem.

One night, while Spencer is riding Brendon, the message that suddenly slides into Brendon's mind is I bet Jon and Ryan look fucking amazing like this and there's even a mental image that makes Brendon throw his head back and moan, twisting his hand around his erection and coming hard, his orgasm slamming into him out of nowhere. Spencer looks at him, shocked for a second, and as the waves of Brendon's orgasm fade off pleasantly, he feels himself clench around Spencer and Spencer pushes in hard and comes, babbling Brendon's name.

A few minutes later, Brendon's heart is still pounding, but he's happy to lay there and let it keep right on. "Brendon," Spencer begins, sounding guilty.

"Spencer," Brendon says, impressed. Spencer blinks at him. "You sent a picture! Do you know how long it took me to figure that out when I was in school?"

"Two weeks?" Spencer asks, grinning.

"Three," Brendon jokes with a laugh, hitting Spencer playfully. "You give me too much credit."

"I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions," Spencer says, mockingly serious. "It's not like you were able to hack into our computer system in a few days or anything."

Brendon feels a jolt of paranoia, guilt, and fear all rolled up into one moment. He tries not to let it show, but it happens so suddenly that he can't keep straight the expression he's supposed to have right now.

"What? What's wrong?" Spencer asks, concerned. He pushes Brendon's hair off his forehead carefully, looking into Brendon's eyes.

"Nothing, just. A bad memory," Brendon says. Spencer shifts closer and presses his lips to Brendon's in a simple, sweet kiss. "Let's just go to sleep."

Spencer complies easily enough, and Brendon counts down from 1024 in binary to calm his mind before falling asleep. It helps, but not enough.

******

Brendon wakes up the next morning way too early. He stares at the ceiling and listens to Spencer's even breathing, hoping it will help him calm down. After a few minutes, though, he has to admit he's wide awake. His dreams were some mix of paranoia about being caught and about today's shipment, which will be the first one he delivers alone.

Sighing, he gives up on sleeping any longer and pushes out of bed. Spencer makes a sad face in his sleep when Brendon leaves his side, and Brendon smiles to himself as he sees it. He takes his time in the shower, letting the steady spray calm him down and reminding himself that he's done plenty of shipments now to handle one simple one on his own. As he sits alone in the kitchen, eating breakfast, he decides to leave early and get the delivery over with. The schedule didn't give a specific time, just said any time today, and this way he might be able to meet up with the guys early.

Ryan stumbles into the kitchen, hair sticking up and eyes barely open, just as Brendon is heading out. "Hey," Brendon says, "I'm gonna go make my delivery early. Could you let Spencer know for me?"

Ryan blinks at him for a few seconds, and Brendon wonders momentarily if he should repeat the question. But then Ryan says, "Sure." Brendon waits, but Ryan doesn't follow it up with anything, so he turns toward the elevator. "Hey, Brendon?"

"Yeah," Brendon says, voice tilting up at the end to make it a question.

"Just, good luck," Ryan says, mouth quirked up in a small smile.

Brendon instantly flashes back to his first delivery in his mind. The memory is confusing, as it was good and bad - mostly good, to be honest - but now he's not sure if he's allowed to see it that way. "Thanks," he says to Ryan, ignoring the memory.

He feels guilty opening the hatch, because it's bound to wake everyone up. But he gets the hover board out without incident and makes sure the hatch is secure before heading out.

The bus hub isn't too far of a walk, but when Brendon gets there, the latest bus is already pulling away. Sighing, he reads the schedule and sees that he's got another 45 minutes to wait. He goes to buy his ticket, guessing that's what he gets for leaving early. He connects to the hub's network on his device and settles in to watch a movie. It's just starting to get interesting when his ticket buzzes to call him for boarding, so he pauses it and heads outside.

For several awkward moments, Brendon attempts to load his delivery into the storage space. Passengers give him dirty looks, and he tries to avoid eye contact. If he could just get the hover board to cooperate and lower a fraction of a centimeter--

"Need some help with that, dear?" a kind female voice says to him from behind.

"Yes, that would be great, thank you."

She reaches up and pulls the hover board down, then shoves it into the space easily. Brendon smiles and thanks her again, supposing that's what he gets for trying to do it strictly with computers.

"I take it you're just visiting," she says, taking in his delivery clothes. They may not be universally recognized as delivery clothes, but they're unique enough on this planet to be recognized as alien.

"Yes, ma'am," he says. "Just here to make a delivery. I have a translating device that allows you to hear my words in your dialect and vice versa." On the bus, he takes a seat across from her in case she wants to continue their conversation. He knows she won't ask his name or what's he's delivering, but he still feels nervous. Working at the bar had been easy, with a specific script he could use on people and the security of working for an underground business. Now he has to judge for himself whether people are trustworthy, and on new planets with their own social norms, it's just too hard to tell sometimes.

Once the bus starts moving and she still hasn't spoken to him again, he guesses it wouldn't be rude to continue watching his movie. Three hours pass, and when he looks up from his screen, most of the passengers are gone. He pulls out his ticket to track how much longer he's got - about 20 minutes - and realizes that the woman is still sitting across from him, reading a physical copy of a book. Brendon tries to be subtle about trying to read the title - he's not used to being able to find out what people are reading just by observation, people are so private - but he fails spectacularly. She laughs at him and holds the book up straight so that he can read the title.

"Good Omens," Brendon reads. "What's that about?"

She smirks at him, shaking her head. "Just an unlikely group of people trying to save the world," she explains sweetly, looking for all her sincerity like there's a joke he's missing out on. "You're going pretty far out for your delivery," she says, setting her book aside.

"Yeah, I guess so. It's a pretty simple one, shouldn't take long, but we value face-to-face transactions in our company."

"I'm sure they'll appreciate that," she says as the bus stops, and just like that she grabs her book and slips out of the door. It's none of his business, but Brendon wishes he'd asked for her name. He has a feeling she would have told him.

The remaining 15 minutes seem to drag on, and Brendon has a much easier time getting his box out of the storage space than he had getting it in. He nods at the driver to signal that he has everything he needs, and blinks in surprise when the driver smiles and waves at him before driving off.

Brendon's still feeling good from the kindness of those two strangers when he pulls out his device and discovers that the connection he was feeding off of inside the bus is completely gone. His good mood fades almost instantly as he pulls up the map and the device never gets past the "Connecting..." page.

"No, no, no," Brendon whispers, trying to find a possible private network he can hack into. After several minutes of standing on the curb, frantically stabbing at his mobile device, he has to admit that it's not going to work.

He can't believe that there's not a single working network within his range. Their security must just be insanely good, keeping all other devices from leeching. He pauses to take a deep breath, then works hard to recall the map as he saw it before leaving the ship.

He wanders the streets for a while, looking for anything that he might recognize as being nearby, but after nearly an hour, he's so frustrated he wants to cry. He can't call anyone, he can't look at a map, and he can't even put out a distress signal. He turns around, wondering if he can even remember how to get back.

He's interrupted from this frantic mindset suddenly by a shout from the house behind him. He turns and discovers a young boy sitting on the ground next to the house, playing. The boy shouts again, and as Brendon watches, his father comes outside to check on him. Brendon feels a surge of hope, calling, "Excuse me?"

The father turns, surprised at first, then favors with Brendon a welcoming look. "Hello young man, can I help you?"

"I hope so. I'm afraid I'm very lost. I can't get a map up on my mobile device, and I'm trying to make a delivery," Brendon explains, gesturing at the hover board behind him.

"Where are you headed?" the man asks.

"2948 West Jales," Brendon says, his voice lilting up at the end to make it half a question.

"Oh, you've almost got it," the man assures him. "Just keep going about 5 blocks that way, then left for 3 blocks, and you'll see Jales."

Brendon thinks "almost got it" is a little generous, since he was heading in the wrong direction, but still. "Thank you so much."

"It's no trouble at all," the man says kindly, turning then to his son to help him up.

When Brendon gets to Jales, he discovers his problem -- the street changed names just a block from where he passed through earlier. He sighs in relief when he approaches the door to the correct house, and he checks the number twice before knocking.

An elderly woman answers the door, smiling warmly at Brendon. "You must be our delivery person."

"Yes, ma'am. I'm sorry for the late hour, but I got a little lost."

A man approaches the doorway, smiling at Brendon in that same welcoming way. It's a bit strange for Brendon, with all these strangers being so nice to him. As a delivery boy, he's not used to much of a response from the typical stranger. Mostly people's gaze flicks over and away from him, and if they speak to him, it's only to ask for something from him. The man looks apologetic as he says, "That's right, your network devices don't work way out here. We're sorry about that," he says, looking to his wife. "I suppose we should have let you know that when we placed our order."

"It's no trouble," Brendon says politely, waving it off. He puts on his best delivery boy smile and asks them to please sign here to transfer their funds.

"Nonsense," the husband says, clapping a hand on Brendon's shoulder and leading him inside. "You look like you need a good meal, and we just so happen to have one sitting in the kitchen."

"Oh, I really don't want to impose--"

"Sit and eat," the woman admonishes, not unkindly. She reminds Brendon of his grandmother, fierce but still sweet. Aptly, his stomach rumbles right at that moment, so he is forced to laugh and accept their offer.

The meal is amazing, and the woman joins Brendon in praising the desert that her husband made. By the time Brendon eats his last bite, he feels full and content, and he can't stop thanking the two of them.

"Now, if you'll just sign? I guess the transaction won't go through until I get back on the bus, but--"

"Oh, no need to worry about that," the woman says. "We'll pay you with paper."

Brendon blinks at her for a moment. Paper?

"Paper money," the man clarifies, amused. "You'll just take it to the financial transfer center and they'll set you right up. We don't have an electronic account."

Electronic. The word is familiar, but it seems so... old. "I'm... not sure I know how all of that works," he says, hesitant.

"Oh, it's very simple," the woman says as she hands over a bundle of, sure enough, paper money. "I assume you got on the bus at the hub over in Adjunct?" At Brendon's nod, she continues, "Well, just two buildings over is the Exchange Center. They'll make the transfer for you, and you should have it in your account within the hour."

"Oh," Brendon says, unable to help himself in examining one of the pieces of paper money. "Sounds easy enough. Sorry for being so ignorant of all of this," he adds, feeling more like a fool than he has in a long time.

"Don't worry about it, son," the man says, walking with him to the door. Brendon smiles kindly back at him, feeling for once as if he's welcome, even as a random delivery boy. "We're very happy with your service. I'm sure will order from you again the next time you come around."

"That's great," Brendon says truthfully. "I'll do my best not to get lost next time."

With another round of smiles and goodbyes, Brendon pockets the stack of paper money and collapses the hover board, heading back in the direction given him to catch the bus. Luck is on his side this time, and the bus comes within five minutes of him reaching the stop.

As soon as he settles into his seat, he refreshes his device and feels a comfort and relief when it automatically connects, giving him access to the usual things. He has no new messages, which is mostly a good thing, though it seems a bit odd that no one would contact him all day. He sets the privacy volume on his seat, then settles in and calls Spencer.

The ring only sounds for a few seconds before it's cut off, and Spencer is responding with a relieved, "Brendon."

"Hi," Brendon says, a little surprised at Spencer's tone. "You sound... I dunno, like you weren't expecting me."

"You were out of contact all afternoon," Spencer says, and his voice still sounds funny.

"Yeah, there's apparently no network this far out," Brendon says, automatically keeping his voice low even though he knows the privacy settings are in effect. "I'm not sure? But I think this planet is still kind of new to the whole technology thing. The customers were really nice, older, but their stories didn't have much to do with computers."

Spencer makes a noise of assent, and Brendon can't help but feel more comfortable at the familiarness of it. "So we'll see you in a few hours?"

Brendon starts to answer 'yes,' but then he remembers the bulk of paper in his pocket. "A little longer, actually. I have to go down to the Exchange Center and finish this transaction first."

"You... what? You didn't complete the sale?"

"Not yet. I have to change over their paper money, but they assured me it was very simple."

"Oh," Spencer says. Brendon waits, but he doesn't say anything else. The silence stretches on, and finally Brendon clears his throat. "Well, the bar isn't far from the ship. We'll meet you there as soon as you're done."

Brendon still feels unsettled, like something's not right, but he doesn't know how to address it. "Okay," he says. "I'll see you soon. And..."

"Yeah?"

"Nothing. Just, I'm looking forward to seeing you," he says, smiling goofily. He doesn't care if people can see him; they can mind their own business.

Brendon's unease lessens when Spencer's tone is just as he expects it to be as he answers, "Yeah, me too."

******

As the bus gets closer to the hub, Brendon starts to feel antsy. He can't wait to tell Jon some of the woman's stories; he has a feeling Jon would love to hear them. Maybe next time Jon can come with him. And he can tease Ryan, saying that this planet would be perfect for him, almost no computers at all for him to break. A smile seems to be stuck on his face as he leaves the bus, but his expression clouds when he approaches the Exchange Center and it's pitch dark. He approaches the door, unsure, and sees that there are posted hours. He does the quick translation from Ship Time to Planet Time and realizes he's just over an hour too late. Sighing, he pulls out his device and sends a quick message to Spencer.

headed over now. got some bad news.

Brendon keeps his device out in his hand as he walks back, but finally puts it away when, after a while, Spencer doesn't answer. He finds the bar much more easily than he found anything else today, recognizing the familiar symbols and feeling the familiarity wash over him.

He sees Spencer immediately, and smiles without even meaning to. He's at the bar talking to Gabe, who seems remarkably sober, nodding at Spencer solemnly. Brendon doesn't care what he's interrupting though, just makes a beeline for Spencer and hugs him right away.

Gabe laughs, not unkindly, but Brendon frowns a bit when Spencer keeps his back straight, his arms around Brendon more of a gesture than anything natural.

"I'll talk to you later, man," Gabe says to Spencer, then to Brendon, "and it's good to see you too, Brendon."

Brendon doesn't respond; he's too busy trying to get Spencer to look at him. "What's wrong?"

"What's the bad news?" Spencer asks, tone clipped.

"Oh, it's not--" Brendon cuts himself off, seeing the harsh look in Spencer's eyes. "Just that we need to stay on planet tonight. The Exchange Center was closed by the time I got back, and I've got to stop by tomorrow before we can leave." Spencer seems more closed off at that, and Brendon's stomach feels funny. "Is that a problem?" he asks, worried.

Spencer sighs dramatically, and Brendon would be a little annoyed at that if he wasn't sure that he really screwed up this time. "I'll deliver the message," he says, walking away before Brendon can even think to ask what the problem is.

The bartender walks up then, asking Brendon if he wants anything, and Brendon casts one look out for Spencer (who is nowhere to be seen) before sighing and saying yes, he'll have a beer.

William approaches him before too long, and Brendon is grateful that William - also remarkably sober, weird - seems to want to carry most of the conversation. He smiles and nods in all the right places as William rambles about interplanetary policy, even offering his own opinion here and there.

"You okay, kid?" William finally asks, and Brendon wants to laugh at someone like William calling him 'kid.' William has a year on him, maybe two.

"It's been a long day," Brendon admits, surveying the crowd one more time and not seeing Spencer anywhere.

William nods as if he feels Brendon's pain, and then offers to go find Jon for him.

"That would be great, actually. Do you know where he is?"

William nods conspiratorially, wrapping his fingers around Brendon's wrist and leading him toward the back of the bar. Brendon is surprised when they approach a doorway - he definitely hadn't noticed that before - and through the doorway, he finds Jon and Ryan, along with about 6 others, sitting in a circle and, apparently, smoking up.

"Brendon," Jon says warmly, shifting closer to Ryan, who reaches for him instantly, and beckoning him over to sit in the space he's now freed. Brendon pauses, wondering if that's such a good idea but realizing there's nowhere else for him to be right now.

"We ran out," Jon tells Brendon as soon as he sits down, frowning slightly.

"I think maybe you got enough anyway," Brendon says, patting his arm consolingly.

"No," Jon says, smiling, "I mean, you didn't get any."

"Oh," Brendon laughs. "I think just being with you is gonna be enough for me."

Jon smiles like Brendon just gave him a compliment and pulls him into a sideways hug.

"Hi, Brendon," Ryan mumbles, favoring him with a content smile from Jon's other side. "How'd your delivery go?"

Brendon frowns a bit. "Well, I actually need to stay overnight and finish the transaction. At least, I think we're staying..."

Ryan nods like he understands, then turns to Sisky to pick up a conversation that Brendon apparently missed the first part of.

Brendon glances back at Jon to find him watching Ryan fondly. He smiles to himself, feeling happy for them, but then he feels a pang as he remembers Spencer's pissed off look.

The feeling only gets worse when Jon turns back to him, asking, "So, where's Spencer?"

"I'm... not sure. I think I messed up again," he admits. He feels unsettled in his skin and the worst part is that he doesn't know why Spencer's angry.

Jon stares at Brendon with this tiny, adorable frown, and Brendon doesn't want to feel sad anymore. "You worry too much," Jon tells him, renewing the hug and, after a few seconds of sitting there comfortably, suggesting that they all go down the road to a diner he saw.

He's met with unanimous agreement from the rest of the room, and when Brendon tries to decline, Ryan joins Jon in pulling him along anyway.

Jon promises to buy Brendon pancakes, and later, after a couple bites of these pancakes, Brendon is starting to feel relaxed and happy again. He tells some of his stories about the family he met, and as expected, Jon loves them immediately. Ryan even agrees that he'd like to meet them, next time.

Even when Jon steals some of Brendon's pancakes, and even when Jon and Ryan decide the next two minutes are Make-Out Time, Brendon can't help but smile. He has to force himself not to watch them kiss, but he's used to ignoring that particular feeling. He's reflecting on just how lucky he is to have these guys when a shadow falls over their table.

Spencer is standing there, arms crossed. "Can I talk to you?"

"Hey, Spencer Smith," Jon says, pulling away from Ryan but not enough to make much of a difference. "Join us."

"I just came to talk to Brendon," Spencer says, and Jon's face does this thing like he's not sure whether to be confused or annoyed or just let it go.

"Just tell me what I did wrong," Brendon says, unable to wait any longer. "If we can't wait until tomorrow, fine, just. I don't know, take it out of my paycheck."

"It's not about the wait, Brendon," Spencer says, exasperated like he's had enough. Brendon starts to feel indignant, but he doesn't argue. "You can't just accept it when people refuse to pay you the right way! You do realize what they did to you, don't you?"

Brendon stares at Spencer, who is trying to keep his voice down, but every word is still pointed enough to feel like a slap to Brendon. Slowly, Brendon shakes his head. He's trying not to get angry, but he doesn't like to be talked down to.

Spencer sighs. "They gave you fake money, and they kept you around long enough that you wouldn't discover the counterfeit until tomorrow, when they assume we'll have to leave, whether the transaction was complete or not."

"If you felt this way," Brendon begins, voice controlled, "why didn't you mention it on the phone when I first called you?"

"Because I thought you were avoiding me," Spencer snaps, glancing over at Jon and Ryan, who do a very bad job of pretending they weren't listening.

Brendon is confused. "Why would I be avoiding you?"

"Look, it doesn't matter. The point is that you got scammed, okay? You need to do better next time."

Brendon knows he's supposed to just accept that, because Spencer's his boss, but he can't help being annoyed. "If you had mentioned this before, I could have gone back. Hell, I can go back tomorrow, they're not going anywhere."

"We don't have time for you to spend all day over there again," Spencer says. "You can go to the Exchange Center when it opens, and when they tell you they can't help you, we're just gonna have to go." Brendon's heart speeds up and he's about to snap something back, but Spencer suddenly stands up, cutting him off. "I'm going back to the ship," he says, stomping off before anyone can respond.

Brendon stares after him, anger making him mutter things under his breath, but he's not about to chase after him.

They get the check right then, and Brendon scowls at the machine even as Jon signs for the charge. Why does everything have to be computers, anyway? That man and woman, they had been nothing but kind to him, and they lived every day without computers. Spencer was wrong, he had to be. Brendon couldn't wait to shove it in his face.

Jon and Ryan stay quiet as they walk back to the ship together, and Brendon gradually begins to calm down. By the time he gets back to his room, his anger is beginning to fade away, and sadness is taking its place. As much as it sucks to admit it, he knows he's gonna have trouble sleeping without Spencer there. He leaves his door open, collapsing on the bed and staring at the ceiling. Maybe if he went over and apologized, Spencer would let it go. He thinks through that for a while, but he can't bring himself to do it. He feels like he owes it to the family to wait, only to accuse them if something truly goes wrong.

There is a knock on Brendon's door, but Brendon doesn't much feel like sitting up. "Come in," he says to the ceiling.

Ryan walks up, stopping just at the edge of Brendon's vision. "What time does the Exchange Center open?" he asks.

Brendon huffs an annoyed breath. He'd heard the quiet murmur of Ryan's voice as he talked to Spencer, but he is definitely not in the mood to hear the riot act from Ryan now, too. "10 o'clock ship time," he answers. "Don't worry, we should be able to leave shortly after."

"They won't leave until we're both back on the ship," Ryan says firmly, sitting down on the edge of Brendon's bed.

Brendon sits up at that, staring at the back of Ryan's head. "We?"

"I'm going with you," Ryan says, not making it a question. His tone stops Brendon from making a comment about not needing a babysitter; he sounds like he's a little bit angry, too.

"You don't have to--"

"Be ready by quarter of," Ryan says, cutting him off. "I'll see you in the morning."

Ryan shuts the door behind him, and Brendon thinks maybe he will be able to sleep.

******

There's a short line at the Exchange Center when they get there, and Brendon can't help fidgeting as they wait.

"What do we do if it's fake?" Brendon says, a new thought coming into his head. "They're not going to arrest us, are they?" He stares at the desk with frightened eyes, wondering if getting arrested this far away from Earth could still get his picture sent all the way back.

Ryan reaches for Brendon's hand and squeezes it, bringing Brendon back into the moment. "They're not going to arrest us," Ryan promises.

"How can you be sure?" Brendon asks quietly, but he realizes that Ryan's probably right.

Ryan rolls his eyes and tugs Brendon forward as the line moves, but he doesn't drop his hand. Brendon is secretly grateful that he has Ryan here, because even if it all backfires, at least he'll have someone to back him up.

When they walk up to the desk and the privacy filters go up, Brendon suddenly blanks. Ryan has to say, "Give her the money, Brendon," and then he nearly falls over trying to get it out of his pocket.

"Sorry," he mumbles, handing it over. She smiles politely and begins to count the pieces of paper. Brendon wonders if, even if it is real, they might have short-changed him. He didn't even try to count it.

"And the account number?" she asks, looking to Ryan, who answers when Brendon's mind remains blank.

"And is there anything else I can help you with today?" she asks, and Brendon just blinks at her, feeling like an idiot.

"That's all, thanks," Ryan says, squeezing Brendon's hand, this time in slight admonishment.

"Thanks," Brendon calls even as Ryan leads him away. "Was that really all?" he asks Ryan as they head back outside.

"Brendon," Ryan says, examining the receipt.

"What?" Brendon says, already setting himself up for disappointment.

"They overpaid you by twenty percent," Ryan says, handing Brendon his receipt.

"What? No way, they shouldn't spend all that money on me." Sure enough, Ryan's right. Brendon's been tipped plenty, but never more than ten percent, and even that was only the one time, on a very small order. "This is ridiculous. I have to thank them!"

Ryan smiles, probably reflecting the huge smile on Brendon's face. "Will they get a message if you send it to them?"

Brendon pouts a bit, because no, probably not. "Well," he rethinks, "maybe. They said they were gonna order from us again, so maybe when that happens, they'll get my message?"

"Perfect," Ryan says before going quiet as they board the ship again. Brendon bites his lip, wondering what he should tell Spencer. As his subordinate, he should report that the transaction is complete, but last night's thought of rubbing it in Spencer's face has lost its glamor today.

"I'll let Spencer know that we're ready to take off," Ryan says, and Brendon knows it's an offer more than a statement.

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna get some more sleep," he says, hoping it sounds like thank you.

Ryan slides his hand around Brendon's one more time, squeezing slightly before letting go, and Brendon's sure it means you're welcome.

******

When Brendon wakes again, he knows they've taken off. He marvels that once again he slept through the actual lift-off, but the soundproofing system is apparently flawless. He stares at the ceiling in the dark, feeling much better about everything now that he's gotten some sleep. There is a soft knock on his door, and he pushes up on his elbows before saying, "Yeah?"

Can I come in? Spencer asks, and Brendon's breath catches at the unexpected message. It's as if Spencer knows he has a weakness for his thought-voice.

"Yeah," Brendon says, trying to figure out if he's still angry at Spencer or not.

He gestures for the lights to go up a little bit, and Spencer says, "Oh, I didn't wake you up, did I?"

"I was already awake," Brendon says, not looking Spencer in the eye.

"Oh. So, I guess I'm back to where we started, apologizing for some stupid comment I made."

Brendon sends a puzzled look at the comforter, hoping Spencer knows it's meant for him.

"I mean, not that this was the same. I really screwed up this time," Spencer admits, sitting in Brendon's desk chair next to the bed.

"Did you?" Brendon asks.

"Brendon," Spencer says, tone pleading. Brendon has to look at him then, though he hates how one look at Spencer's expression makes him want to forgive him anything. "I'm sorry," he says, and Brendon knows that he means it.

"You should have trusted me," Brendon says, looking away again and hunching over a bit.

"It's not you that I didn't trust," Spencer says, sounding miserable. "It's these strangers, Brendon, and you're just so trusting. I wanted to make sure you were being cautious."

Brendon shuts his eyes, taking a deep breath before he says, "No."

"No?"

"You weren't making sure of anything," Brendon accuses, opening his eyes now. "You didn't ask me anything, you didn't even give me a chance to defend myself."

He sees Spencer's face contort, and he can already imagine Spencer slamming the door on his way out, and the days of miserable avoidance he'll have to put up with between now and their next stop. But then Spencer's features smooth out, and he says, "You're right."

"I am?" Brendon says, surprised.

"God, I'm so bad at this," Spencer mumbles, mostly to himself. "You're right, I didn't trust you. But it wasn't anything against you, it was just-- I'm your boss, and as your boss, it's my responsibility to make sure we get paid." His eyes plea with Brendon to understand, and he wants to, he really does.

"That doesn't explain why my boss didn't mention that there was a problem immediately after he found out what was up," Brendon points out.

Spencer's eyes slip closed, and he looks properly reprimanded. "That was my own fault. I let my emotions get in the way."

Brendon clinches his teeth. "Don't do that," he says, more of a plea than a command. "Don't talk about our relationship like it's an obstacle." He pulls his knees up to his body and wraps his arms around them, fighting the impulse to bury his head in his arms.

Spencer stares at him like he's been betrayed. Brendon, he says, and there's enough raw emotion that it makes Brendon's chest hurt.

"What?" he says out loud, refusing to willingly let Spencer hear his emotions so plainly.

"I thought you were avoiding me all day because I screwed up the night before," Spencer explains, staring at some point on the wall. Brendon tries to recall the night, which seems so long ago, but all he can remember is really amazing sex and then falling asleep with his usual paranoia. He doesn't see where Spencer could've caused the latter, or why the former would be a problem, so he waits. "I woke up and you were gone, and I don't know, my mind went into overdrive."

"You're an idiot," Brendon says, rolling his eyes and shifting so that he can cross his legs on the bed.

"When you called me, I was just grateful you weren't actually mad at me. It didn't even occur to me to... I don't know, reprimand you, or check with you about the money, until after, when I was talking to the captain, and then you were almost back."

"And then I messaged you and said there was a problem," Brendon remembers.

"Exactly," Spencer says softly.

Brendon tries to think of it from Spencer's point of view, and even though part of him wants to insist that Spencer should trust him, he kind of gets it. "I don't want to fight anymore," he finally says.

Spencer looks him in the eye, hopeful. "Me either," he says.

Brendon nods, as if it's been decided, but he still doesn't know where to go from here.

Spencer stands suddenly, and Brendon braces himself for Spencer to leave, telling himself it's for the best so they can both calm down. But then, after a moment of hesitation, Spencer leans one knee onto the bed, facing Brendon. He waits there, and Brendon finally stops waffling and opens his arms to pull Spencer in.

The hug is exactly what Brendon needed, and he fists his hands into the back of Spencer's shirt, not wanting to let go. Spencer clings just as fiercely, and Brendon takes a deep breath and counts his blessings.

******

At their next stop, Brendon and Spencer are all set to pick up some new cargo just a couple miles from the hub. Spencer makes a quick call to the seller to verify the details, and then they head out.

Shortly after leaving the hub, Spencer takes Brendon's hand. He's not much for PDA on the job, so Brendon knows it's something of a peace offering. Sure enough, Spencer follows it up with a message clarifying that he's not tagging along because he doesn't trust Brendon, but rather because he was asked to. Brendon squeezes his hand and says, Don't worry about it. I like spending time with you.

He smiles at Spencer to back up his statement, realizing that they so often rely on thought-speak now that he sometimes forgets to communicate normally. It's an amazing feeling, knowing that he can trust his biggest secret with Spencer.

They walk on in silence, and Brendon's mind wanders to trust and secrets. He thinks about Anjela and her advice on trust, recalling little moments like Jon using fake names for both of them on that dodgy delivery, and Ryan speaking up for him at the bank.

"Something's bothering you," Spencer observes out loud. Brendon blinks, snapping out of it, and turns to him. Spencer's mouth quirks into a small smile. "Wanna talk about it?"

Brendon looks down at their joined hands as they walk along, choosing not to answer right away. Spencer doesn't push it, which is nice. Eventually, Brendon takes a deep breath and says, I'm thinking about telling Jon and Ryan about what I can do. He lets the message carry his doubts, concerns, and slight hope, knowing that Spencer's skilled enough to read all of it.

Spencer doesn't respond for several minutes. Brendon can tell he's deep in thought, so he stays quiet and keeps to his own mind in the meantime. He starts to feel tired from walking so far, which reminds him how much time he hasn't been in the gym lately.

Eventually, Spencer speaks up, out loud this time. "I used to think I couldn't say anything about it, to anybody. But if you hadn't found out, I'd still be completely overwhelmed by the whole thing. I'd trust both of them with my life, so I guess... I mean, if you want to tell them, I'll tell them too."

Brendon smiles, relieved to have Spencer's support. They're nearing the rendezvous point for the pick-up, so Brendon quickly dismisses it, saying that he'll think about it for a while.

The warehouse seems oddly quiet as they open the door, and the reason why becomes rapidly apparent - there's no one here. More importantly, there's no cargo either.

"They did say 440, right?" Brendon asks, recalling the number on the door.

Spencer nods, looking perturbed. He pulls out his mobile device, mumbling about how they verified less than an hour ago. As he dials the client's number, Brendon glances around the empty space, a sudden wariness filling his mind. He barely hears Spencer's stern but professional rant, but he gathers the gist: The client's bailed. There is no pick-up.

Spencer hangs up, cursing loudly. "I mean, it doesn't even make sense. An hour ago everything was fine, and why wouldn't he have called? He didn't even sound sure of himself when I did call, and we've already been paid."

Brendon doesn't like the sound of that. "What did he sound like on the line? Was he, I dunno, nervous?" Brendon's eyes skim the periphery of the warehouse again. He can't shake the feeling that they're being watched.

"Yeah, I guess a little bit. Why, what are you thinking?"

Brendon feels for a moment like he can't breathe, but he only lets the feeling linger for a second before shaking it off. "Can we go?"

Spencer nods absently, scrolling through his device. "I just don't get--"

Spencer, Brendon interrupts, impatient. Can we please go?

Spencer seems surprised, which means some of Brendon's anxiety probably showed in his message. "Yeah, of course, let's go."

Brendon feels more paranoid than usual on the walk back to the ship. He does his best to tell Spencer, without speaking, that it's probably nothing, but he's just got a bad feeling that all of this is tied up with the Academy. He waits until they get back to the ship and into Spencer's room before he can relax, and even then the possibility stays in the back of his mind.

"They had almost tracked me down back home. It's not impossible to think they could figure out who I started working with. What if the whole thing was a trap?"

Hey, Spencer says, his tone soothing, you're safe now. He stretches out over Brendon, pressing kisses into his neck and sending these thoughts that are almost empty, but somehow still calming. Brendon was so proud when Spencer figured that one out - even he doesn't know how to do it.

"I just wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I put any of you in danger."

"We're fine," Spencer insists. "And I'll follow up with the captain. Make sure we never buy from this guy again, and find out if there's anything else we can learn from the sale."

"Thanks," Brendon says, but he still feels guilty. He tilts his head into Spencer's kiss, trying to lose himself in the feeling, but it doesn't quite work. His mind is still racing.

Are you having second thoughts about telling Jon and Ryan? Spencer asks.

Brendon shakes his head. "Kind of the opposite. If there is a danger, I want them to know the whole story." He bites at his lip. "I just..." He struggles with the words for a moment, but Spencer is patient. "I just don't want to do it while we're here, I think."

Spencer nods, making the decision for him. "We'll tell them while we're in transit, then. If you're sure you're ready."

"Definitely," Brendon says, already feeling better.

******

When Spencer bursts into the common area a few days later, Brendon doesn't know what to think.

"Brendon! Brendon, I am so sorry. Please say you'll forgive me, Brendon, please."

Spencer grabs onto his shoulders and looks at him imploringly, so that Brendon has to answer. "I don't--what did--?"

"I accidentally told Jon you were a telepath!" Spencer blurts before Brendon can finish, and it's then that Brendon realizes why Spencer is acting so strange.

"Spence, are you high?"

Spencer just stares at him, wide-eyed, so that it's all Brendon can do not to laugh. Finally, he says, "No, that would be awful, if your boss went around smoking up when he was supposed to be working."

He keeps glancing toward the kitchen, and finally Brendon can't take it anymore. He bursts out laughing, and Spencer just looks confused. "Are you hungry?"

"Starving," Spencer admits, pushing past Brendon into the kitchen.

Brendon lets himself think about what's going to happen next as Spencer puts a muffin in the microwave and then stares at it until the timer goes off. He doesn't really have any answers.

He watches Spencer sit down with his muffin, but then, to his surprise, Spencer only picks at it, looking guilty. "There's something else."

Brendon raises his eyebrows, taking in Spencer's ashamed look. It shouldn't be so endearing, but he can't imagine Spencer doing something really bad. A thought enters Brendon's mind, and he's suddenly sure he's got it right. "You made out with him."

"No!" Spencer says immediately, cheeks going red. "I mean, I didn't let-- He kissed me."

Brendon can picture it instantly, how Jon's lazy kisses would measure up against Spencer's meticulous ones, and he wishes more than anything that he'd been there to see it happen.

"I didn't let it go any further, I swear," Spencer continues, cutting into Brendon's fantasies. After a second, Brendon nods, apparently easing Spencer's conscience enough, since he goes on to devour his muffin.

It really doesn't matter to him that Spencer made out (or almost) with Jon. The fact that he wants to is actually awesome news, and he'll be sure to bring it up again later. But Jon knows now, and Brendon didn't get to be the one to tell him. And maybe he didn't believe Spencer, but one thing seems obvious: it's either tell them now or have them find out later in a less ideal situation. Brendon wants to deliver the message himself.

He goes to the wall panel to page the two of them upstairs. He figures if their boss is high and currently taking a lengthy snack break, they can probably finish their shifts later.

The first thing he notices is that Jon has definitely been making out with someone, but when Ryan trails in behind him, it becomes clear who that someone is.

"You guys probably think I'm the worst boss," Spencer says with a frown. Jon and Ryan see what he's eating, though, and go immediately for the cupboard.

"I'm pretty sure you're working under the wrong definition of 'worst'," Brendon says, earning him a smile from Ryan.

"Loosen up," Ryan tells Spencer, "it won't kill you."

"So what's with the family meeting?" Jon asks around a mouthful of muffin.

"I have an announcement," Brendon says, feeling wary. It's weird that Jon isn't looking at him any differently. Maybe Spencer was remembering it wrong. Still, he has to do it.

"Brendon, are you sure...?" Spencer says, and then hesitates. I didn't mean to force you to tell them.

"I'm doing this because I want to," Brendon says aloud, and then fixes them all with a serious look. "I'm a telepath."

Brendon's not sure if it's the drugs or what, but nobody has the reaction he expected. Ryan immediately looks at Spencer, who looks even guiltier now, and Jon is completely unfazed.

He watches Ryan and Spencer have a silent conversation as Jon plays with the hair at Ryan's nape and waits. Finally, Brendon's anxiety bubbles over, and he has to break the silence. "Isn't anyone going to say anything?"

"I'm a telepath too," Spencer says, "just... not as good as Brendon."

Brendon's pulse picks up, because it seems less like support now and more like painting a big target on both of them. But then Ryan nods at Spencer and says, "I'm a healer."

"Wait, what?" Brendon says, and he has to put down his drink.

"You remember your first delivery, with the bottle?" Spencer prompts.

"Healed you," Ryan says with a shrug.

"You're kidding."

"My turn now?" Jon says, and they all turn to him in unison. Brendon thinks he will always remember his smug grin as he meets Brendon's gaze and says, "I can see the future. Precognition, or whatever."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Ryan says as Spencer mumbles, "Son of a bitch," both of them echoing Brendon's thoughts.

"Read my mind if you don't believe me," Jon challenges, raising his eyebrows.

Brendon shakes his head. "No. I never read anyone's mind unless I absolutely have to, and have their permission."

"Am I ever gonna win the lottery?" Ryan asks, smirking.

Jon rolls his eyes, but his smile stays. "It doesn't work like that. I can't control it, and the context always screws me up, but I've never had a vision that failed to come true."

"Wait, hang on," Spencer says. "But you can see the future."

Jon nods, looking amused.

"So does that mean you already knew about us?" he says, gesturing to Ryan and Brendon.

Jon shrugs, but his sheepish look gives them the answer.

"You jerk!" Ryan says with a disbelieving laugh, slugging him on the shoulder.

"It's not my fault! I only know what I see, and I've already seen everything that's happening right now. Trust me, it took some getting used to."

Brendon narrows his eyes, then tips over his bottle. Jon reaches out expertly to grab it before it hits the ground.

"No way," Spencer says incredulously, still a little affected by the pot, Brendon's sure.

After that, the whole thing becomes some twisted version of show and tell, but Brendon needs the proof. Even after he has it, he can't quite believe that his three best friends all have abilities, just like him. All this time, he's been surrounded by other specials, only these guys are so much better than anyone he'd met at school. Their abilities have made them cherish their friendships rather than view them as a means to an end.

"Brendon? You still with us?" Jon asks, cutting into his thought process. He slings an arm around him and favors him with an easy smile.

"Yeah," Brendon says, sure of that at least. He returns Jon's smile before turning to share it with everyone. "Always."

******

The next time Brendon smokes up with Jon, it's after one long conversation with Spencer and a whole lot of planning. He spends the first few minutes paranoid that Jon knows exactly what he's trying to do, but then he takes his first toke and stops worrying.

Jon starts musing on the mechanics of the ship, and Brendon gets caught up in the sound of his voice for a while. When he remembers his plan, it seems so simple to just hold on to the joint, wait for Jon's noise of protest, and then let him shotgun the hit off him.

Jon's mouth fits against his nicely, and it doesn't take long for things to escalate into making out. The joint drops from his fingers as he reaches out to pull Jon closer, which he realizes distantly is a big change from the first time they did this. When Jon hums against Brendon's mouth, it's like it vibrates through his entire body.

I've been thinking about this, Brendon says, pushing the thought forward complete with implications of what exactly he's been thinking about.

Jon's breath hitches. "What about Spencer?"

"Did I just catch the clairvoyant off-guard?" Brendon says with a smirk, and Jon bites his lip to keep from laughing. "Spencer knows about this. It was his idea."

"Oh," Jon says, eyes widening minutely. When Brendon leans in this time, Jon meets him halfway and quickly deepens the kiss, tongue curling against Brendon's and a slow hum escaping from his mouth. When he pulls back, he looks like he's up to something. "Does this mean you're allowed to share details about your sex life now?"

Brendon's lips curve into a wicked smile. "I can do you one better," he says, and sends Jon an image that makes his breath catch in his throat.

"That's a nice trick," Jon says, his lips curving upward. He curls his arm around Brendon's neck and draws him closer, his body warm against Brendon's as they make out lazily.

Jon suddenly makes a disgruntled noise into Brendon's mouth, and when he pulls back, he's cringing. Brendon's hand goes immediately to his temple - he knows from headaches - and presses down hoping to ease the pressure.

"Fuck," Jon says with feeling, reaching up to grab Brendon's wrist. He doesn't pull his hand away, though, just keeps a hold of Brendon. Brendon swallows thickly and keeps moving his fingers in a circular pattern, fairly sure it's helping.

He watches Jon's eyes darting back and forth beneath his eyelids and has a feeling he knows what's going on. The way Jon's mouth is hanging open, though, is so inviting... He's tempted to lean in and take his mind off the vision. And then, as suddenly as it started, Jon's eyes pop open and his gaze is clear. Clear, full of want, and fixed on Brendon. "Did..." Brendon licks his lips. "Did you just have a vision?"

"You mean you didn't watch?"

"No, I--" Brendon stops and tries to remember how to form sentences. With Jon looking at him so intently, it's kind of hard to think. "I won't do that unless you give me permission."

Jon squeezes his wrist where he's still got his fingers wrapped around it. "This was permission."

"Oh. Well excuse me for not knowing wrist-squeezing translated to 'read my mind,'" he says with a laugh, but it sounds a little manic. "I'll do better next time."

Jon's eyes are fixed on Brendon's lips, and it doesn't escape Brendon's notice. Especially not when he mutters, "fuck," and pulls Brendon's wrist down and toward him until Brendon follows with it, and then Jon is kissing him with much more intent than before. Brendon is already half hard from everything that just happened, and he can't help but wish Spencer had given him permission to do more.

"Stop, we can't--" Brendon starts, pulling back reluctantly, his breath coming fast. He tilts his forehead against Jon's and counts up from 32 in binary. He flips 0's and 1's in his head until he feels like he's regained some control. "I have a question."

"The answer is probably yes," Jon answers, voice rough. It hits Brendon twice as hard because it's Jon, and Jon never gets worked up over anything.

"Have you ever had a vision about me?"

"Yes."

"A sexy one?"

"Yes."

Brendon swallows, struggling to phrase his next question. "The one you just had... was it like that?"

Jon laughs like there's a joke Brendon missed. "You might say that."

Brendon sits up straight, a thought occurring to him suddenly.

"That was three questions."

"I have one more."

Jon inclines his head, inviting him to ask. "One more."

"Is it, uh." Brendon cuts himself off, taking the time to think about his question. He knows that Jon won't divulge the details of his visions if he believes they'll change someone's mind about something. It's frustrating, but Brendon usually understands. This time, though, he wants to know. "Is it possible you've had a vision that involves all of us? Like, together, not just..." He trails off, unsure how to phrase it.

Jon takes pity on him and answers anyway. "It's possible I just had one."

Brendon's mouth goes dry. "Oh."

"Yeah," Jon says, a bit breathless.

******

Much to Brendon's chagrin, Spencer isn't in the mood for much of anything that night. He's in a horrible mood, as things with Ryan apparently didn't go so well. Brendon frowns exaggeratedly, hating to see Spencer unhappy, and puts his first and foremost efforts into making him smile.

It takes a lot of kissing and some strategic tickling, but Brendon is finally able to earn a smile from Spencer. Feeling victorious, he settles back on his elbows so he can see Spencer properly and asks, "So what happened?"

Spencer sighs, pulling a pillow to his chest and fiddling with the cloth around the edge. "He pissed me off is what happened. Everything was going as planned at first - I had my head in his lap and we were shooting the shit about the old days. There was definite flirtation going on, but when I went to kiss him..."

He trails off, and Brendon frowns, not understanding. "He pushed you away?"

"He didn't even let me get close enough to push away," Spencer says, his eyebrows drawing together. "And then he accused me of only coming to him because things weren't going well with you."

Brendon barks out a disbelieving laugh. "I hope you told him it was my idea to begin with."

Spencer shakes his head, accidentally tearing the cloth on the pillow in his frustration. "I didn't get a chance. By the time I'd finished saying that you and I were fine, he'd gone on to accuse me of pushing him aside, and pretty soon we were both too angry to have a reasonable discussion. I came over here and slammed the door."

Spencer tosses the pillow aside, accidentally turning the lights up in the process. Brendon quickly gestures them back down and moves into Spencer's space, eager to make him feel better again. "How about I tell you about a little scenario Jon shared with me earlier?"

Spencer steadies Brendon's arms as he settles into place so that he's straddling Spencer. He arches an eyebrow and asks, "What kind of scenario?"

Brendon pushes an image into Spencer's mind that makes him gasp and arch into Brendon. "Yeah," Brendon breathes, remembering his own reaction.

"But, all four of us...?"

"I think it's time I shared my afternoon adventures," Brendon says with a leer, and Spencer smiles again.

******

After Brendon's conversation with Spencer, there are nearly two weeks before their next stop. It's plenty of time to piece together a plan, complete with Jon's help, but it gets more and more frustrating when Ryan seems to be distancing himself from all of them.

Brendon knows this is only going to work if they do it on-planet. They have to give Ryan the opportunity to leave, if he really wants to, and let him know that they want him - in public, in private, always.

It's a long delivery. Ryan's in a bad mood and Spencer's caught it. Jon and Brendon try to soothe their respective boyfriends' tempers with some success, but it's still not an ideal trip. Brendon starts to feel nervous about their plan as the delivery part starts to wrap up, and even Spencer's attempt to calm him down mentally doesn't help.

And then Ryan tries to go straight back to the ship. He's pretty dead set on it, actually, until Spencer offers a metaphorical olive branch to their whole not-quite-argument and convinces him to have one drink.

They have that one drink, or well, they've started a drink a piece before Spencer gets up from his seat beside Brendon to move to the other side of the booth, squishing Ryan between himself and Jon.

"What are you doing, Spence?" Ryan asks, sounding tired as Brendon hits some controls on their table to give them some privacy.

"Just trying to break the monotony," Spencer quips, looking nonchalant.

"Okay, so I have to tell you guys about this story Tom told me," Jon says, and launches into another of his crazy anecdotes. Pretty soon, they're all laughing, and Jon concludes, "Needless to say they wouldn't let them back in the control room after that."

"Oh man, that reminds me... Do you remember the first time we went up in a ship?" Spencer asks, bumping elbows with Ryan. "Ryan's uncle had a small cruiser on loan, and he let us see the control room. We couldn't have been older than 13..."

Ryan smiles, eyes distant. "You thought you'd figured out how to fly it."

"We'd always talked about traveling," Spencer defends, smiling wide. "I figured I'd hit the jackpot. Just a few more times sneaking on board to test things out, and we had our ticket out!"

"No way," Brendon laughs, starting to understand. "You guys were gonna take off with your uncle's ship?"

"Loaner ship," Ryan reminds him.

"We got so far as starting up the engine in the middle of the night before we got caught out," Spencer explains, his laugh dissolving into something more serious as he remembers.

"We were gonna run away together," Ryan says around a smile, his focus completely on Spencer.

Brendon can feel the tension in the air as their eyes meet, and it's even better than they planned when Spencer moves in, capturing Ryan's lips with his own. It's everything the first attempt hadn't been, from what Spencer had told Brendon - confident and unwilling to accept arguments. Even better, Brendon gets to watch this one. He sees the moment Ryan's shock wears off and he starts reciprocating, tilting his head just so and taking control of the kiss in the way that only Ryan can.

"Wow," Jon finally says, a bit breathless, expressing Brendon's exact thoughts. As Spencer pulls back, he shares a long look with Ryan before they both shift their gaze to their left. "Jon," Ryan says, looking wrecked.

Jon gives him his typical easygoing smile and says, "You two look so good together."

Brendon can't see, which he wishes he'd thought of while they were planning this, but he knows that Jon and Spencer each have a hand sitting on each of Ryan's thighs right now.

Ryan, he says, cautiously. Ryan looks up at him suddenly, as if he forgot Brendon was there. Brendon smiles winningly. Do you like this? Would you like us to keep going?

He reaches his hand across the table toward Ryan, giving Ryan a reason to be looking at him. Ryan stares at his hand for a moment, the smallest of smiles tugging at his lips. "Did you guys plan this?"

"He's onto us," Jon says in a fake panic.

"Shut down everything," Spencer says, leaning away from Ryan.

Brendon thrills when Ryan holds Spencer in place, and the feeling doubles when Ryan then reaches out and takes his offered hand. "Yes, keep going."

They all turn their gaze on Brendon, and he can't help but feel self-conscious. Why does he have to be the one to say it?

"Um, well, there's only so much we can do at the bar..." No, wait. That implies something more vulgar than what he meant to say. "Not that that's all we're trying to--I mean." He feels like an idiot.

He feels Spencer's mind inside his, sending out his trademark blank thoughts, something like white noise, but they're comforting. He turns Ryan's focus on himself and cuts in for Brendon. "We want to date you. And each other."

"The four of us," Jon concludes.

"Exclusively," Brendon says for good measure. Jon nods at him.

"But that's--"

"--not normal?"

"--ridiculous?"

"--too good to be true?" Brendon tries, going for optimism.

Ryan smirks. "I was going to say 'impractical'. None of our beds will hold four people."

"I like where your head's at," Brendon says even as Spencer gears up for his defense.

"We can take turns in pairs for a week or so. We're due to visit Earth in a few weeks, and I've already found a place near our stop where we can order a new bed." Ryan turns to him, a smile playing on his lips. He doesn't have to say anything, and Brendon has a feeling Spencer doesn't have to read his mind either. Spencer ducks his head and murmurs, "Wishful thinking."

"We've all talked about it," Jon explains, "and we all definitely wanna do it. But we're only game if you are."

Ryan doesn't answer at first, taking in each of them in turn. He looks unsure, and it's making Brendon anxious.

Eventually, Spencer sighs. "Don't even bother trying to say you're not up for this, Ryan Ross, because I will read your mind if I have to."

That startles a laugh out of Ryan, loosening something in Brendon's chest.

"It's not that I don't want it, because I do," Ryan finally says, and as far as Brendon's concerned, that's the end of the conversation. Still, Ryan continues, "It's just... what happens if one of us gets bored? Or finds someone else? How does a breakup even work with four people?"

Jon shrugs. "We don't know."

"That's what being in a relationship is all about, though," Brendon muses. "Taking the risk."

Ryan stares back at him, hard, for several long seconds. Brendon meets his gaze and waits until finally, a smile slides onto Ryan's face. "Yeah, okay. Let's do it."

Spencer and Jon give a celebratory whoop and high-five over Ryan's head. Ryan ducks his head and squeezes Brendon's hand where he's still holding it on the table.

"So, Brendon. Since you were so eager to get us out of here... Did you have something in mind?"

"Well," Brendon says, licking his lips, "now that you mention it..." He looks to Spencer and Jon for approval, then focuses his mind entirely on Ryan.

Much as I'd love to have you all to myself tonight, I think you and Spencer have a few things left to work out. Ryan flicks his eyes to Spencer for a second, looking nervous but not opposed, and this confirms Brendon's suspicion. Spencer notices the look, but instead of saying anything, he tilts his head down and starts placing kisses along Ryan's neck.

"Good ideas?" Jon says, a bit impatiently, and Brendon knows how he feels. He wishes Jon were over here to give him kisses, or vice versa.

"Still working out the details," Brendon says, eyes glued to Jon's mouth.

We can take turns using Jon's bed. It's the biggest anyway. But if you get Spencer, I get Jon. I've been wanting to blow him ever since he wore those jeans he got on IS7.

He says all of this to Ryan, but his gaze stays on Jon the whole time. By the end of it, both Ryan and Jon are squirming in their seats. Brendon shifts to look back at Ryan, concluding, And otherwise, you'll have Spencer all to yourself, for as long as we can spare him. But we get to watch.

He imagines what they'll look like together, Spencer's hands on Ryan's hips as he thrusts into him. He forms as strong a mental image as he can, biting his lip and focusing, and then he sends it to Ryan.

There's no obvious reaction, not to a typical passer-by, but Brendon hears Ryan mumble something under his breath, and then Ryan squeezes Brendon's hand so hard Brendon considers letting go.

Yeah? I thought you might like that. Spencer is sucking on Ryan's neck enthusiastically, his hand moving up Ryan's thigh, and then Brendon can practically feel Spencer in Ryan's mind, though he doesn't hear what is said. Ryan's eyes immediately snap to Brendon's lips.

You want my mouth? Jon can prepare you while I suck you. I can get off just from that. Is that what you want?

Ryan nods.

Tell me. Tell us.

Ryan turns to Jon, kissing him thoroughly. "Want you to get me ready so Spencer can fuck me."

Jon nods, mouth slightly open.

"What about Brendon?" Spencer asks.

"I'll keep Brendon's mouth occupied," Ryan says, smirking, "at least until it's Jon's turn."

Brendon smiles. "Does this mean we can go back to the ship now?"

"Fuck," Ryan breathes, burying his face in Spencer's shoulder. "Give me a minute."

You really got to him, Spencer says, sounding impressed. You gotta do that to me sometime.

If anyone sees them leaving the bar, they probably assume they're drunk off their asses, and maybe they'd be right, but it's not from alcohol. Brendon feels a different sort of high as they all make their way back to the ship, joking and laughing to keep from doing something stupid in public in the meantime.

Brendon's not sure if Spencer said something to him privately, but as soon as they step into the elevator to go up to their quarters, Ryan pins Spencer against the wall and kisses him within an inch of his life. Jon makes an appreciative noise and then places his hand on Brendon's arm, pulling him in for a kiss of his own. It's just as languid and thorough as Jon's kisses always are, except this time Jon's hands find their way into Brendon's back pockets, and when the elevator dings Jon merely guides them out by walking Brendon backwards.

"Hold that thought," Jon tells him in a low murmur before moving ahead to let them all into his room.

"You cleaned up," Spencer says as he takes in the room, clearly impressed.

"Don't sound so surprised," Jon retorts, moving into his space to take over when Ryan left off. Spencer smiles into the kiss, and Brendon watches as his tongue sweeps forward into Jon's mouth.

"We're never gonna get anything done at this rate," Ryan complains, approaching Brendon out of nowhere and getting to work on his buttons as his kiss turns Brendon's brain to mush. Brendon takes the hint, guiding him back toward the bed and taking over with the undressing until he gets his hand on Ryan's dick and then his mouth takes over and it doesn't occur to him that Jon and Spencer are watching until Spencer is in his mind, saying, God, Brendon, I could watch you two all day.

By the time Spencer pulls him away from Ryan, Brendon is achingly hard from taking in Ryan's wanton sounds and the movement of his hips, and they both make noises of loss as they get pulled from one another.

The feeling doesn't last long as Spencer pulls Brendon off the bed and wraps his hand firmly around his cock as he kisses him fiercely, licking the taste of Ryan from his mouth.

They pull back and rest their foreheads against each other for a second, both catching their breath, but soon Jon and Ryan distract them once more.

Brendon curses under his breath as he watches Jon's fingers fucking in and out of Ryan and Jon's mouth latched onto Ryan's neck, exactly where Spencer had focused his attention back at the bar.

"He's super sensitive on his neck," Spencer whispers, tone reverent.

Brendon shifts his gaze back to Spencer, his expression saying exactly what Brendon's thinking: We're actually doing this. I can't believe we're actually doing this.

They quickly help each other out of the rest of their clothes, just in time for Ryan to call for Spencer in a breathless tone.

It's all a happy blur as Spencer moves in and then pushes his way slowly into Ryan, the two of them so clearly lost in each other. Brendon only gets pulled away from the scene as Jon wraps his arms around him from behind, his arousal obvious against Brendon's back.

"I was promised something to do with your mouth," Jon says quietly as Brendon turns in his arms.

"Only if you want it, Jon Walker," Brendon says, letting his eyes travel up and down to take in the sight of Jon's now naked body.

Jon smiles. "I had a vision of you a couple of weeks before you showed up on our ship. It was of you going down on me while Spencer and Ryan fucked on the bed." He traces his thumb across Brendon’s lower lip. "I was getting off to the thought of your mouth before we even met."

"Jesus fuck," Brendon murmurs, hips stuttering against Jon's. "You've had that one on your mind this whole time?"

"Something to look forward to," Jon says, corner of his mouth tilted up.

"Well let's see about making it come true," Brendon says, backing him up against the wall and kissing his way down his body.

A million things flit through his mind as he sucks and licks, including the thought of past!Jon experiencing all of this as his first impression of Brendon. The world is weird.

He doesn't dwell on it for long, Jon's fingers winding into his hair as he loses that well-crafted control he always seems to have. The sounds of Ryan and Spencer getting off overwhelm him for a moment, and then Jon is murmuring something that can only be a warning. He moves his hands to the back of Jon's calves, urging him on and swallowing as much as he can as Jon comes.

There are appreciative things being said all around as Brendon pulls off, but all he can think is that if he doesn't get off soon, he's going to explode. Jon is two steps ahead of him though, leading him to the bed where Ryan and Spencer have made room as best they can. Jon takes his cock in hand and then licks from root to tip, pulling an incomprehensible word from Brendon's mouth. And then Ryan is there, kissing Brendon again, and there are hands on his chest that can only belong to Spencer, and with all these stimuli Brendon can't even think where to focus. He can feel his control slipping as his orgasm builds, and his vision blanks out as he comes.

"Whoa," he finally says after he's had a few seconds to catch his breath.

"Yeah," Ryan agrees.

They're all awkwardly squeezed onto the bed, and Brendon knows they can't sleep like this. Pretty soon they're gonna have to split up, at least for the night, otherwise there are going to be some pretty powerful aches in the morning. But for now, he still has points of contact with all three of them, and he lays content until someone chooses to speak up.

******

One morning, Brendon wakes up with an arm slung around his waist and it takes him a minute to figure out whose it is. When he recognizes the bony elbow of one Ryan Ross, he takes advantage of the unexpected cuddling, slowly rolling over and burrowing closer to Ryan.

Ryan's arm twitches, and then his eyes slide open a fraction. "G' back to slee'," he mumbles unhappily, pulling Brendon in even closer so that their bodies fit together and then shutting his eyes firmly.

Brendon sees no reason to argue, and the next time he opens his eyes, he's alone. A quick evaluation on the wall panel tells Brendon they're still a week from their next stop on Earth, which is five days behind schedule.

When he wanders out to the kitchen and announces this, everyone makes disgruntled noises.

"Cabin fever," Jon whines, shaking his device - either because he's playing a game and that's part of it, or because he's that frustrated. Possibly both.

Spencer passes by and catches Brendon around the waist, pulling him in for a quick but thorough kiss. "Morning."

"We've gotta get that bed," Ryan says. "Last night was the only night I will ever voluntarily carry Brendon anywhere, I don't care whose turn it is to sleep in Jon's bed."

"Is that what happened?" Brendon asks, smiling cheekily. That explains a lot.

"We have no work left to do," Jon points out as Brendon heads over to the cabinets, pulling down whatever looks edible and promising. "What are we supposed to do for a week? Not that I don't love you guys, but I'll go crazy if I have to stay within these walls the whole time."

"Space walk?" Brendon suggests. A quick look over his shoulder shows Ryan blanching and Spencer looking wary, but Jon's eyes light up.

"Definitely."

"Just please be careful," Spencer cuts in. "It's still not 100% guaranteed safe, and the captain wouldn't be too happy if he found out we lost half our cargo crew because they were bored."

Jon stands behind Spencer's chair and rubs at his shoulders in reassurance. "We'll be careful," he murmurs, leaning down to press a kiss on the back of Spencer's neck.

The space walk is great - Brendon's been looking for an excuse to do one for ages - but once it's over, he's all the more aware of their confinement. They all do their best to keep themselves occupied in the intervening days, but something snaps in them when they find out on t-minus three days that it's actually going to be t-minus four.

"Okay, everybody calm down," Spencer says over top of Brendon, who is threatening to find out how to get to the top deck and give the captain a piece of his mind. "I'll go talk to him. I'm sure there's a reason."

Jon grumbles after him that it better be a good one, and they go back to their ridiculous card game while they wait. Brendon thinks the game's ridiculous, anyway, because there's no logic involved, and he's losing horribly.

Brendon's already out of the game by the time Spencer gets back, and his expression is unreadable. "Good news and bad news," he says.

"What's the bad news?" Ryan asks with a sigh.

"It's probably gonna be five days 'til we land."

They all groan loudly, but Spencer doesn't seem too disheartened, so Brendon prompts, "The good news?"

"Once we do get in port and finish our transfer, he's agreed to extend our time on planet by two days," Spencer says. "We'll be touching down in England, but he says we can borrow the cruiser and go spend the time wherever we want."

Jon and Ryan immediately react excitedly to this news, but Brendon doesn't share the sentiment. It's not like he can go visit Zack and his other friends from the bar, and even being in the country could be dangerous. Jon is already planning the trip for them, promising an amazing home-cooked meal from his mother, but then Spencer interrupts him, his eyes intent on Brendon.

"What is it?" Spencer asks, his tone soft. He settles in next to Brendon on the couch, his hand over Brendon's knee.

Brendon takes in a deep breath and says, "Maybe I'll sit this one out. You know, keep an eye on the ship."

Jon and Ryan immediately start arguing, but Spencer knows more than they do, and he keeps his solemn gaze on Brendon. "You won't be in any danger with us."

That shuts the two of them up pretty quickly, and they sink down on the couch. "Danger?"

"Why would you be in danger?"

Brendon lets out the breath he'd been holding, no less nervous than he'd been a second ago, but at least now he's got the comforting touch and attention of all his boys.

"I guess it's time I told you all the whole story of where I learned about my abilities."

He takes a deep breath and starts from the beginning. "When I was ten..."

******

"Would you please calm down?" They've been on the cruiser for fifteen minutes and already Ryan's snapping at him.

"Sorry," Brendon says, keeping his eyes on the path in front of him. "I'm just really... exervous." A pause. "Excited and nervous? Yeah?"

Spencer scoffs. "Can you please just focus on navigating?"

"You're the one that agreed to let him drive," Jon says, making his way up to the seat next to Brendon. When he leans in, Brendon welcomes the kiss for a moment before returning his attention to the controls. It's really not hard to navigate, not for him anyway, but he still wants to make sure he doesn't screw up. They'd never let him live it down.

"How much longer before you can put it on autopilot?" Spencer asks, clearly nervous.

"I find your lack of faith disturbing, Spencer Smith."

"Shouldn't be long," Jon answers for him, always the peacemaker.

If anything, he gets even more nervous once he's done with the flying part. He can't believe that they're going back to Chicago. He can't believe that the guys actually planned a way to get Brendon there without raising any questions. Mostly he can't believe that he has people in his life that care enough to do all this.

"And you're sure we're not gonna get caught?" Brendon asks Jon for at least the third time.

"I told you, Brendon. I'm never 100% sure, but I've seen us flying back on the cruiser, and nobody seemed scared or harmed or otherwise unhappy."

"Okay," Brendon says, taking a deep breath.

"Stop worrying," Ryan says, swatting him on the back of the head and then leaning down to brush a kiss just behind his ear.

"Mixed signals, Ross," Brendon shouts as Ryan passes into the backroom, probably to make more tea. Ryan flips him off without looking back.

The landing is even more fun than taking off had been, and he does it without making anyone feel nervous, himself included, so it's a double success.

"Okay, so your face is going to swell up," Ryan explains, and Brendon tries not to eye the air gun in his hand too much. "And it's important that you not talk, no matter how much you want to."

Brendon nods. "Got it."

"If you need to say anything to us, just do it mentally," Spencer says.

Brendon rolls his eyes. "We've been through this a dozen times."

"And if you need a response that isn't out loud," Spencer continues over him, "I will of course be the one to give it to you."

Brendon waits, then raises his eyebrows. "Anything else?"

"Just try to behave," Ryan says with an eyeroll. "I'll heal you when we get to the bar."

"You'd better," Brendon says, and that along with his whimper as Ryan gives him the shot are the last things he says for a while.

******

A couple miles of walking and one bathroom make-out session with Ryan later, Brendon is back to normal again. "I'm still not convinced that kissing helps you focus," Brendon quips. "I think it's just an excuse."

"One I won't be making in the near future, not with you," Ryan retorts, backing off.

Brendon knows he doesn't mean it, and to prove his point, he grabs Ryan's belt loops and pulls him in for another, better kiss. "So, you've been pissy with me for nearly a week," Brendon argues.

Ryan stares back at him blankly, but he doesn't deny it. When Brendon just raises his eyebrows, he finally says, "I didn't think you'd noticed."

Brendon settles his hands more firmly on Ryan's hips, frowning. "I always notice."

Ryan shrugs dismissively, and Brendon thinks he'd probably back away if he wasn't being held in place. "I'll get over it."

"Or you could tell me what the problem is."

"It's not a big deal."

"I could just read your mind."

"But you won't. It's against your code of ethics or whatever."

"I make special exceptions for particularly stubborn boyfriends."

"Fine," Ryan says, rolling his eyes. "The other night, when you fell asleep in Jon's bed. You didn't want to come with me. You wanted to stay with Jon and Spencer."

Brendon racks his brain, but all he can remember is some pretty great fooling around, and then waking up the next morning with Ryan.

"I told you it wasn't a big deal," Ryan says, crossing his arms.

"Hey, no," Brendon says, reaching up to uncross them. He gets one arm free, which he figures is good enough. "Dude, I don't even remember, but I'm willing to bet that I was just tired and too lazy to leave the bed."

"I had to drag you back to your room."

"Again, lazy." There's a moment where Ryan looks unsure, and Brendon seizes it. "I love sleeping next to you. It's one of the few times I get to see you relaxed and touch you at the same time."

The other arm comes down, and Brendon starts to feel victorious, but then they're interrupted by a knock on the door, and then Spencer comes in before they can respond. "What's taking so long?"

"Nothing, we're coming," Ryan says. He pulls Brendon in and kisses him, slow and calculated, before pulling back and leaving the bathroom without a word. Spencer sends Brendon a confused look, but Brendon just shrugs.

He walks out to the bar just in time for Zack to show up for his shift, and everything comes rushing back. He shouts excitedly at Zack as a 3-second warning before he barrels into him with a hug. Their group is welcomed by the entire staff, and the first round is given to them on the house. The next few hours pass in a happy blur of alcohol and catching up. Even Bossman is happy to see them.

"You've changed," Zack tells Brendon after the guys disappear onto the dance floor. "For the better."

"Nah, I'm still the same guy," Brendon says, holding up his drink. "Same guy who can't hold his liquor."

Zack laughs. "Can't argue with that. Hey, I have to ask, are you four...?"

"Yep."

Zack nods. "Good."

"Good?"

"You're clearly crazy about all of them. It'd be a disaster if you had to choose."

Brendon stares at them on the dance floor, each of them acting ridiculous in their own way, and Zack's right. He's crazy about them.

"I'm just glad you're happy, buddy," Zack says, clapping him on the shoulder. "Now get out there before I push you."

They stay late into the night, dancing for a while and then coming back to the bar to swap stories, and Brendon's so exhausted by the time they get back to the cruiser that he doesn't even complain that they each have single beds.

The next day is somewhat restless - he can't leave the cruiser unless he wants to swell up and stay silent again, which wasn't particularly fun - but once Jon gets back from visiting his family, they head back toward their ship eagerly, with the promise of a new bed waiting for them.

******

Assembling the bed takes a couple hours longer than planned, but then the victory is that much sweeter. Brendon stretches out over the new mattress, limbs flung wide, and there's still room for the others to fit alongside him.

"We're gonna need twice as much cooling in here at night," Spencer observes, ever the practical one.

"I can reprogram the system so that at night, it'll only cool this room out of the four bedrooms. It should be more energy efficient than if it were cooling them separately."

Spencer is either satisfied with that answer or too tired to respond, which Brendon takes as approval. Brendon hauls himself off the bed and goes to set it up, knowing if he doesn't do it now that he'll only become less motivated the longer he lays on the bed.

When he gets back, nobody seems to have moved. "Oh, are we going to bed now?"

Spencer makes a disgruntled noise. "If you want to go exploring, we'll do it tomorrow. I didn't spend hours putting together this bed so that it could go unused."

"No, I know, I just... I wanted to say thanks," he says, picking at the hem of his shirt. "I know you all probably had better things to do on your couple days off, but. It means a lot."

Ryan makes a noise of disbelief as Jon pulls Brendon back down onto the bed. "You would've done the same for any of us," he says before kissing him quickly, then tilting his head down to kiss Brendon's neck, working his way down as he undoes the buttons on Brendon's shirt.

"It was fun," Spencer says, "and it's important you feel safe when you're with us."

"I do," Brendon says, gasping as Jon gets a hand on him, having pulled his pants off in one smooth move. Spencer moves in and swallows the next noise to escape his mouth. When he pulls back, Brendon fixes him with a significant look and says, "But I think Ryan's the one I should really be thanking."

"Don't thank me. It was just an excuse to make out," Ryan teases, shifting into the space where Spencer and Jon once were. He smirks down at Brendon, but there's something else in his expression: a look of affection that Brendon has only seen from him one other time, way before he and Spencer worked their shit out and got together.

Everything he'd felt at the bar comes rushing back twice as hard. He hauls Ryan in by his collar, mumbling something about getting rid of clothes.

"We can help," Jon volunteers, immediately getting to work.

Ryan's kisses start traveling down, lingering first on Brendon's neck, then continuing to his collarbone, and Brendon has to take a second to catch his breath.

"I can't believe you didn't know how crazy I've been about you," Brendon murmurs, a bit breathless.

"What?" Jon says, pausing in his ministrations to shoot Ryan an incredulous look.

"Seriously?" Spencer says. "Ryan, come on, you're like his biggest weakness."

"Hey," Brendon protests, "who said anything about weakness?"

Ryan bites down just a bit around Brendon's nipple, causing a whimper to escape from Brendon's mouth. "You were saying?"

"Okay Ross, enough messing around," Brendon says, maneuvering him so that Jon can get his pants off, then sliding his hands down Ryan's back until they reach his ass before finally pulling him flush against Brendon's own body.

Ryan goes with the movement, grinding down against Brendon. It feels amazing, so Brendon makes a noise of encouragement and pulls him in again.

"Jesus, you two," Spencer says from beside them, and when Brendon glances over, Spencer has his pants pushed open just enough to get a hand on himself. Jon appears to have noticed at the same time, because he mumbles something heated and makes his way over to Spencer to help him with that.

"Switch with me," Brendon says to Ryan, who goes with it without asking questions. Brendon smiles to himself when he is able to angle his body to keep their friction going and suck a mark into Ryan's neck at the same time. Ryan curses loudly and arches into Brendon, urging him to move faster. His hand fumbles between them and grips their cocks together, and Brendon gasps against Ryan's neck as he starts pumping.

Things start to get hazy as he gets lost in the feeling, but through it all he definitely hears Spencer make a reverent statement about Jon's body, and then realizes it's in his head, fuck, and then Ryan twists his wrist just right to bring Brendon over the edge.

He shifts as Ryan's movements get more frantic, reaching down to help him along. It's always amazing to see Ryan lose control like this, murmuring things under his breath that he'll never say otherwise. Brendon avoids kissing him until the last possible second just so he can hear his name said that way.

As Ryan comes down, Brendon leans over him to get to the panel, calling up a towel with the knowledge that no one's gonna want to get up in a few seconds. He pauses for a minute just to watch Jon and Spencer moving against each other, thrilling in their expressions. It's even better when Spencer shoots him a look that says he knows he's watching, and then clutches at Jon's arms as he comes.

Once the towel and any remaining clothes are tossed aside, Brendon sighs happily and leans into Ryan, feeling Jon's back lined up against his.

"This was not part of the plan," Spencer mumbles, sounding almost unhappy, but Brendon isn't fooled. He can hear the smile in Spencer's voice as he continues, "But I'm happy it happened."

"Spencer Smith," Jon murmurs, and Brendon can feel him shifting in the pause, "your smiles are what rainbows are made of."

Spencer's laugh stops short, and Brendon twists around to see what's going on. He sees the sudden sincerity in Spencer's expression just before he leans in and captures Jon's mouth, swallowing Jon's surprised noise.

"Really? That worked?" Ryan says, tone dubious.

"Compliments can go a long way," Brendon says, turning back to shoot Ryan a significant look.

Ryan raises his eyebrows and stares back blankly. Eventually, he relents and says, "You have a nice ass."

Spencer and Jon start laughing, and Brendon shrugs. "Works for me," he says, nuzzling up to Ryan before kissing him sweetly.

"Can we go to sleep now?" Spencer finally asks, and Jon snickers.

"Don't even start," Ryan says. "If you're trying to say you'd have rather spent all this time sleeping, you can go sleep on the couch."

"Hey, I never said that, and also, who's the one who put together the entire main frame by himself? If anyone's sleeping on the couch, it should be you, Mr. Weak Wrists."

"He's never going to let you live that one down," Jon says, tone sympathetic.

"Okay, everyone's cranky again, I think it is time for sleep," Brendon says. Still, he makes a point to stretch as much as it takes to kiss each of them in turn. He has the best night's sleep he's had in ages, and starts to appreciate the term 'sweet dreams'.

******

Jon tends to have clearer, more frequent visions when he's with the three of them, so Brendon doesn't think much of it when Jon wakes up with a jolt one morning, eyes distant. He does his best to distract Jon from the associated headache, placing kisses along his collarbone. He can feel the moment the vision ends by the lessening tension in Jon's body and the way he leans into Brendon's touches, but Brendon doesn't press. He knows Jon still needs a minute or two to process what he just saw.

"Hey," Jon eventually says, brushing the hair away from Brendon's forehead.

Brendon looks up to smile at him, noticing the worry behind Jon's answering smile. "Everything okay?" he asks as he repositions himself to give Jon a proper kiss.

"Something else I don't get the context for," Jon says with a shrug, dismissing it by continuing to kiss Brendon. He's definitely worried, though. Brendon tries not to be.

"Are we really getting up now?" Ryan complains groggily next to Jon.

"Only if you want to be," Brendon replies with a leer. Ryan just scoffs and rolls closer to Spencer, who can apparently sleep through anything.

"I'm gonna go for a walk," Jon whispers, shifting to get out of bed.

"Can I come?" Brendon asks with a smile that quickly fades when Jon looks hesitant.

"Maybe join me later," Jon says, kissing Brendon one more time before heading out. Brendon frowns. It's always a disappointment to see Jon put on pants, but today it's even worse.

Brendon would just let it go, except Jon then goes on to avoid him all morning. He sees him talking to Spencer and Ryan throughout the day, and maybe it's work-related, but it still makes him uneasy.

His sense of dread doubles when they all approach him at once in his old bedroom after their shifts are over for the day. Jon hangs behind the other two and looks guilty, and Brendon's first response is, "Why do I get the feeling you guys don't have good news?"

"You should come with us," Spencer says, tone all business.

Brendon gives him a suspecting look. "What if I don't?"

"Brendon," Ryan says insistently. "Come on."

Brendon goes, because he's kind of curious, but he doesn't stop asking questions. "Where are we going? Are we landing early? Is this about Jon's vision?"

They leave the living area and head to the less-visited section of the deck, into the gym, and Brendon's questions stop short when Spencer forces off one of the far sections of the wall, revealing a door.

There's a tiny, dimly lit room behind it, and Spencer puts on his reluctant 'rules face'. Brendon's stomach sinks. "Look, there's no time to explain--"

"Are you serious?"

"--but we need you to wait in here for the next few hours."

"There's time to explain," Brendon insists, looking from one of them to the other. Jon still won't look at him, and Ryan looks just as resolute as Spencer. "Come on. Somebody tell me what the fuck is going on."

"Just trust us," Ryan says, fixing Brendon with a significant look.

"You're gonna shut me into the wall and not give me any other explanation except 'trust us'?!"

"I'm sorry, Brendon," Spencer says before manhandling him into the space. Brendon feels indignation rising in his chest, but Spencer is strong, and he wasn't ready.

He settles for screaming instead. "This is insane! I thought you guys cared more about me than this! Jon, tell me what this is about!"

"It has to be this way, Brendon," Jon says so quietly that Brendon almost doesn't hear him.

It occurs to Brendon that this might just be happening because Jon saw it, which is so irrational and ridiculous that it makes him see red. "Fuck you!" he yells at Jon, and the last thing he sees is Jon's face crumpling before the door is shut in his face.

He stares at the closed door in shock for a few seconds, and tries pounding on it for good measure, but he can tell there's no sound heard from the outside. They could leave him here forever and no one would ever know.

He discovers a working panel in there, at least, which gives him something to do other than curse at them. Don't they know he could've just read their minds and found out on his own? They should be grateful he has morals, god. He's still pissed enough to do something, though, so he hacks into the surveillance and watches them mill about for the next half hour. He tried at first to find a way to unlock the door, but apparently it's a manual lock. Damn it all. But he knows how to translate the sound data and make sense of it, so he watches it go by with the images, and they're all clearly anxious but Brendon doesn't know why. He stares in shock as Nick and De'Mar come off the elevator. He'd had his suspicions about who the captain was, but to be honest, he really thought it would be Pete and Patrick, simply because Pete was always in his face so much. Now he realizes that if that was the case, Pete probably wouldn't have wanted to hide from him.

It's surreal to watch all of them interact while he's kept upstairs, like he's some sort of spy. Their anxiety seems to have a source when Brendon sees five dudes come on board, with one out in front like the leader. Brendon focuses the feed so that he can read what they're saying, but at first it's all pleasantries. Max shows them around the cargo deck, but to Brendon's surprise they don't ask to come upstairs. The leader does, however, gather them all up after the tour and begins to read out a list - to Brendon's surprise, it's a list of their abilities.

"Nick Scimeca, level 8 telekinesis. De'Mar Hamilton, level 5 telekinesis. Tom Conrad, level 4 dream-walking. Max Steger, level 4 psychometry. Jon Walker, level 4 precognition. Ryan Ross, level 4 healing. Spencer Smith, level 3 telepathy. That sound about right?"

Brendon sees Spencer's crestfallen look when he hears he's a level 3 and everyone else is higher, and he wishes he was there to reassure him. Nick takes charge and assures the guy that everyone has long been accounted for, but it's obvious even from Brendon's video feed that they seem to be hiding something.

The dude asks if there's anyone else on board, and Brendon's blood runs cold, but they all deny it convincingly enough. The dude starts hitting buttons on a panel and Brendon realizes with a start who he is - Mr. Warner. He's from the Academy.

"These programs are very impressive," Warner says. "Who wrote them?"

Brendon's boys look guilty enough that Brendon starts to fidget, but Nick doesn't bat an eye when he says, "A hire, from one of the DW-series planets, last time we were outside the Inner Periphery."

The dude looks suspicious. "Who was this mysterious 'hire'?"

Nick shrugs. "He preferred not to give his name, and it was of no consequence to us."

He looks to one of the dudes that's with him (Minion #4, in Brendon's mental catalog), who looks extremely nervous but nods with a fake sort of confidence. "Very well," the dude finally says. "If you happen to see this 'hire' of yours again, pass the word to me immediately." He hands over a holo-card that reflects oddly in the surveillance feed. "He's highly dangerous, and at this point, we're not clear on the nature of his abilities. He likely has at least the power of persuasion, which may be why you felt so content not to know his name. Nothing is safe around this man, not even your thoughts."

De'Mar nods. "What do you suggest if we do meet him? Won't we be in danger just to be in his presence?"

Warner nods, looking satisfied with that response. "Do not approach him if necessary. If he spots you first, try to focus your thoughts on something mundane and unrelated, and then contact me as soon as possible to tell me your location. And for the future, you really should insist on full names in order to do background checks for all your hires. Our society doesn't put enough emphasis on this information. These are dangerous times, gentlemen."

Brendon blinks in surprise when Spencer steps forward. "Well then, if you don't mind, sir, could we take down all of your names? Just for our records, of course."

It's the first time that Brendon realizes it's weird that the dude came on board with 4 other dudes. Brendon imagines the look of dissatisfaction on Warner's face, but he smiles and praises Spencer for good cautionary actions. "Totally superfluous in our case, of course, but we can go around and give introductions, naturally."

"Oh, that won't be necessary," Nick says cheerfully. "We actually have our computers set up with a fingerprint system," he continues, approaching a panel and inputting a code that Brendon remembers explaining to Spencer. "All you need to do is place your hand on the panel, and your information will be stored in our system."

"Very well," the guy says, and his jovial demeanor is starting to slip a bit. "Go on then, boys."

They all walk up and place their hands on the panel in a row, but when the main dude is the only one left, he looks right at Nick and says, "Of course my name won't be necessary in this case."

Nick nods, already pressing the buttons to close down the program. "Of course." Brendon blinks, but none of the other guys even hesitate.

"Well, I think that'll be all for today, men. Let's head out." He ushers his men toward the exit, but he pauses to face Nick once again. "You'll turn in this man the next time you see him."

"Of course." Brendon watches in horror as they all nod mindlessly at the command with that same vacant expression.

Brendon's heart starts racing, and the dude says something else to Nick, but Brendon can't help notice the altercation going on behind them. Ryan and Spencer are talking quietly to each other, but Ryan isn't happy. Brendon keys in the command to focus in on the two of them.

"But why didn't we get his name?" Ryan asks, confused and inching toward angry.

"Because we don't need it, Ryan," Spencer explains, exasperated. "It's completely unnecessary."

"Yeah, I know but--" Ryan rubs at his temple as if he's in pain. Then his eyes widen and he looks around at them all. "No, Spence."

"Ryan," Spencer begins, gearing up for a lecture, but Ryan presses his hand to Spencer's temple and stares hard at him. Spencer starts to bat his hand away, but Ryan doesn't back off until a look of horror flits over Spencer's face. Spencer checks over his shoulder where Nick is closing the door behind the men. "I was going to--"

"I know," Ryan cuts him off, looking serious. "We can't let any of these guys see Brendon before I can heal them, or they'll turn him in immediately."

Spencer nods, still looking stricken. "Guys? Before we get back to work, Ryan has something important to tell each of you."

They all nod, taking this easily enough, but Ryan looks frantic. "Spence. Where's Jon?"

The moment that Brendon translates this dialogue, there's a noise immediately outside the wall he's leaning up against. Brendon jumps and then grabs at the wall, but it's no use; there's nothing to grab onto. "Jon?!" he says, trying not to sound as worried as he is.

"Hey, man. I know you're pissed at me, but it's over now. I came to let you out."

"No! Um, I mean, Ryan has something really important to tell you, like right now." He replays Warner's words in his head, turn him in the next time you see him, knowing that Jon's only seconds away from seeing him and doing just that.

"He can wait 'til I get you out and apologize."

"Dude." Brendon hates this. It's not Jon's fault, but the moment he sees him-- "Something bad is going to happen if you see me right now."

Jon's struggles with the handle stop suddenly. "What are you talking about?" he asks, but his voice lacks his usual confidence.

"What would you do right now if you saw my face?" Brendon tries.

"I'd apologize for shutting you up. You're mad at me, and it sucks." Jon starts twisting the handle again.

"Okay, but what-- what would you do if you saw Brendon Urie?" he asks, desperate.

"I'd turn him in to the authorities. He's a dangerous fugitive," Jon says immediately, voice flat. The handle finally slides through with a loud click, and Brendon pushes himself into the corner of the space in the hopes that Jon won't see him.

"Jon," Brendon whispers. He watches in horror as the confused, caring look drops from Jon's expression to be replaced by a steely determination. Jon, please don't do this, Brendon pleas with his mind, but Jon is already reaching for his transmitter and the holo-card that Brendon had seen on the panel. Please, it's me.

Jon pauses and stares at him, looking desperately confused. "He said you'd do that. Get in my mind, mess with me." He looks down to press in the numbers on his device, and Brendon leaps forward in an attempt to swipe one of the objects from his hands. He knocks the card out of Jon's grip, and Jon stares up at him suddenly, livid. Brendon cowers in the face of that look; he'd never imagined Jon would look at him like that. Jon draws his hand back, and Brendon thinks briefly of running, but then he hears Spencer's Jon, no! as the elevator opens. It's just enough time for Jon to hesitate, and Brendon darts around him toward Spencer.

Ryan heads straight for Jon, who is staring at Brendon with that same angry, determined expression. "Jon, look at me," Ryan says.

Jon does, but the stubborn look remains. "Not now, Ryan, I have to--"

But Ryan's fingers are already over Jon's temples, and he stops struggling when Ryan leans in to kiss him at the same time.

Brendon, Spencer says, grabbing Brendon's hand. Brendon looks into his face, seeing the seriousness and tenderness there. Jon was hypnotized. He didn't know what he was doing. Spencer slides his fingers over Brendon's forehead to brush back his bangs, then continues the movement across Brendon's cheek in a kind of caress. Please don't hold this against him.

Since it's a mental message, Brendon can hear the hint of us when Spencer says him. He places his hand over Spencer's and lowers it. It's okay. I know. He moves close into Spencer's space and feels himself calm down as Spencer lets him cling and clings back just as much.

"Brendon?" Jon says sheepishly.

Spencer pulls back from their hug, leaning in to press a quick kiss to Brendon's lips, then says, "We'll be in the kitchen."

Ryan slips into Brendon's space just as quickly to kiss him, tongue sweeping in just enough to make Brendon's breath catch, and then he's off with Spencer in the elevator. Damn Ryan Ross and his kisses.

When Brendon turns to face Jon, he's surprised at just how miserable Jon looks. "God, Brendon, I am so sorry. I can't believe I almost--"

"Hey," Brendon says, interrupting. "No one was hurt. You weren't in control--"

"No, but I knew, Brendon, I knew." His hands are shaking, and Brendon attempts to take one, but Jon pulls away. "This isn't okay. Don't you get it? I had a vision. I knew you were going to look at me like you were scared out of your mind, and I went ahead and opened the door anyway. I thought I was stopping it from happening."

Brendon attempts to take his hand again, and this time Jon doesn't resist. "Have you ever been able to stop one of your visions from coming true before?"

Jon stiffens. "No. That's the worst part of this whole thing. It's like I have no free will." He stares into Brendon's eyes, looking helpless. "What if it's something worse next time? What if I see something happen to one of you? What if I know how one of you is going to die and there's nothing I can do to stop it?"

His voice cracks as he asks the last question and he lets Brendon pull him into a hug, one of the fiercest Brendon has ever given. "Jon," he says, pouring everything into it. "These stupid things that we can do, our 'abilities'? Fuck 'em. We didn't ask for them, so we shouldn't let them control our lives."

Brendon rubs his hands up and down Jon's back and feels Jon calm down as he melts into the hug. "I will never forgive myself for what I did today."

Brendon pulls back, giving Jon a stern look. "No. Just--no, Jon. Fuck that. You didn't do a damn thing to me of your own will, so stop it right now."

Jon pulls his hand back, surprised. "But--"

"No. You're not allowed to blame yourself for what some douche bag from the Academy forced you to do. Promise me." Brendon holds his pinky out between them and waits.

Jon stares at Brendon's hand for a second before reluctantly hooking his pinky with Brendon's. He cracks a small smile. "This is kind of an antiquated ritual, you know."

Brendon narrows his eyebrows and tightens his hold. "Does that mean you plan on breaking it?"

Jon smiles for real then. "Never," he promises. Brendon awards him with a kiss.

******

"Thanks to Spencer's quick thinking and Brendon's hack of the database, we now have the names and abilities as they are on record for the man's four men. Eric Land, level 9 telekenesis, Zach Sorkin, level 8 empathy, Tony Anderson, level 7 telekinesis, and Alex Suarez, level 4 telepathy. Unfortunately, we weren't able to get the main guy's information, but at least this will get us started," Tom says.

"I know who he was," Brendon says, stepping forward. All seven of them turn to face Brendon in surprise, and he tries not to blush. "His name is Mr. Warner. He was some bigshot at the Academy, I assumed the superintendent. There were rumors that he had a spot in the government, too, but I never knew if they were true or not."

Nick nods and gestures for Tom to enter this information.

"I think it's clear that he has the power of persuasion," De'Mar says, "but how to deal with that next time, I'm not sure."

"If I can heal fast enough, I can try to help others, too," Ryan says.

Brendon nods. "I may be able to resist it by filtering out my sense of hearing? Um." He looks at the floor when all eyes are on him. "I wasn't affected by Warner's commands, and I think it's because I couldn't hear them. If I'm able to close off my mind to hear his words, I think I can avoid them."

"You can do that?" Max asks.

Brendon shrugs. There's no use holding back about his abilities at this point. "I've never tried it before, but it may be possible."

"If anyone can do it, Brendon can," Spencer says confidently.

Brendon beams at him, and then at Jon, who is nodding in agreement. Ryan gives him a small smile before looking away. Brendon bounces, wanting to run around and hug them all, but he keeps it contained.

"Alright, well our best plan of action is just to prepare as much as we can in case there's a confrontation," Nick says. "Jon, let us know if you see anything else, and if any of you have any ideas, please do not hesitate to share them. I know I haven't really united our crew before, but that's changing now. We're going to work together to protect this ship and everyone in it, are we agreed?"

Brendon nods, feeling a pang as he watches everyone else nod.

Spencer approaches him after they return to their quarters, kissing him without saying anything. "You're thinking something stupid about running away to keep us safe," Spencer says.

Brendon tenses, but Spencer runs his hands over Brendon's back to calm him down. "Are you reading my mind?" Brendon accuses, voice just barely shaking.

Spencer blinks in surprise. "Didn't have to," he says.

"I just--" Brendon stops to swallow around his scratchy throat. "I thought I was escaping by getting on a ship. I was stupid enough to think that would be safe. And now I've ruined the lives of seven new people, three of which I damn well love. Fuck." He buries his face in Spencer's shoulder, trying not to cry. Fuck fuck fuck. He shouldn't be pulling Spencer into this.

"Okay, first of all. Who said anything about ruining our lives? If it was Jon who was in danger of being taken away, wouldn't you be right in the front of the defense to keep him here? Or if it were me? Or Ryan?"

"Yeah, but--"

"And second," Spencer continues, "even if you ran away, we'd still follow you. We'd never give up until we found you again, and we'd never forgive ourselves for letting you get away. And if you don't already know that, then you're an idiot."

Brendon swallows, feeling choked up now for a whole new reason. "Fuck," he says again, following it up with a laugh this time.

"Can we come in now?" Jon asks, peering around the doorway.

"Get your asses in here," Brendon says, pressing at the edges of his eyes to get them to stop stinging.

Jon heads straight for Brendon, and Ryan trails in behind him. Brendon welcomes the comfort of a Jon hug, even though Jon has to worm his way in from the side since Spencer won't let go. Brendon smiles when Jon murmurs in his ear, "You're not going anywhere."

Brendon jumps when Ryan's arms come around his stomach from behind, but relaxes into the embrace coming at him from all sides. Ryan presses his lips softly on Brendon's neck, then pauses. "I ran away from home once."

Brendon looks at Spencer as he nods. "I remember."

"I didn't have anywhere to go, and I was afraid to go to Spencer's house, so I went down to the drug store on the corner. I hung out for all of an hour before Spencer hunted me down."

"Why'd you run away?" Jon asks, soft in Brendon's ear. Brendon is struck suddenly by how close they all are, and it makes him smile.

"My dad was drunk, which was nothing new, but when he tripped and hurt his hand, I was trying to bandage it up and it closed up completely when I touched it. My dad screamed at me because it hurt, and then because I was a freak, and as far as I knew he was right. So I tried to escape."

Brendon wants to hug Ryan, but he can't exactly turn around, so he settles for taking Ryan's hand and squeezing it.

"That was the night I told him about my psychic thing," Spencer says softly.

Brendon squirms away toward Jon, leaving Ryan and Spencer to look at each other. "We've been best friends ever since," Ryan says, and Spencer nods before kissing him.

"But you already have us, so no running away," Jon says, smiling. Brendon smiles back and welcomes the kiss that Jon gives him, then goes willingly when Jon pushes him back toward the bed. "You promise?" Jon asks even as he moves to straddle Brendon on the mattress.

"I'm not going anywhere," Brendon swears.

******

In the intervening days, Brendon goes into overdrive trying to coach Spencer on his ability, and he even tries occasionally to help Ryan and Jon develop more with their abilities. They're all thrilled to discover that if Ryan focuses hard enough, he can form a protective shield around anyone he's touching.

Brendon is confident that the only way to avoid Warner's suggestions - other than being healed by Ryan - is to filter out his sense of hearing, though he's afraid to attempt it. The four of them all gather around the table when Brendon first tries it, and with three sets of eyes on him, he concentrates and turns off his aural perception. His eyes widen when he realizes it's worked, and he signals for Spencer to send a message into his thoughts. Spencer complies, and it's so weird because it doesn't feel like he hears the message anymore, just feels it. It's kind of awesome, but totally weird. He nods at Spencer, then looks to Jon, who signals that it's okay to read his thoughts. He has success with that, and again with Ryan, though he can't quite get over how strange it feels. He sighs in relief when he can stop the filter and let sound in again, and he feels exhausted. "I'm going to have to practice that a lot more before it comes naturally," he warns, but the guys all agree to help him out.

Somehow, the pressure of the oncoming confrontation makes Spencer learn three times as fast. He becomes proficient at reading thoughts, much to Ryan and Jon's chagrin, but Brendon is ridiculously proud. Ryan, especially when he's willing to listen to Brendon's advice, improves greatly, until he's able to protect people who aren't even directly touching him. Jon, meanwhile, let's them know any details when he finds them out, though it's sporadic and unpredictable.

This practice becomes something of a routine, and no one mentions that they have no idea how long it will be until they'll need to put it to use.

******

Brendon is sitting in the kitchen, rambling about something mundane on the computer, when it happens.

"Seriously, we know you're smarter than we are, but do you have to hold it over our heads all the time?" Ryan snaps.

Brendon turns to face him, feeling hurt. "I didn't mean--"

"Ignore him, he's just still cranky that we didn't stop at his festival last week," Spencer says, passing through.

"Fuck you. You've taken his side from the beginning, but don't try to pretend like he doesn't piss you off, too. You always came into my room to complain. 'God, he won't shut up, Ryan. What's it gonna take?'"

Brendon looks from Ryan to Spencer, and the latter looks utterly betrayed.

"You know, if you felt this way, maybe you could've said something sooner," he says to Ryan, anger bubbling up.

"Well apparently we can't run this ship without you."

Brendon sees red. He can't believe Ryan really feels this way, and to think that he's been thinking it this whole time just makes it worse. "Well now that I've got you all up and running, maybe you should just dump me off at the next stop! That's where you picked me up the first time, after all."

Ryan's expression smooths out. "That's not--"

"Whoa, what's going on here?" Jon asks, rushing into the kitchen. "Did you not see the message?"

Brendon whirls around to look at the screen, instantly seeing the urgent message. "We're being hailed by the authorities to Earth." He swallows. "To Vegas. The same city the Academy is in."

"What's the reason?" Spencer asks, though he looks like he already knows.

"Harboring a dangerous fugitive," Ryan says from his position in front of the other panel. Brendon watches the tense line of his back.

"We should get upstairs and talk to Nick," Jon says.

They pile into the elevator, and Spencer hits the button in the ceiling to go upstairs. Brendon tries to keep his hands from shaking, tries not to think about what's about to happen. A hand wraps around his own, and he stares in surprise at Ryan. Ryan doesn't say anything, but he shoots Brendon a serious look. Brendon's anger was pushed aside the moment he read the message, so he squeezes Ryan's hand and focuses on what's to come.

They meet with Nick and the rest of the crew in a rush. Max informs them that the rest of the ships in their caravan have been made aware of the situation, but they won't be able follow right away.

They land and are boarded immediately by Warner and his men. Warner demands they hand over Brendon, but the crew are all standing, waiting for him in a line, with Ryan using their joined hands to form a protective shield. Because of this, they're impervious to Warner's suggestions at first.

When Warner figures out what's going on, he orders two of his minions to act, and they use telekinesis to hurl things at their line-up. Nick and De'Mar are able to fend off these threats somewhat, but the minions are stronger.

When it starts to become clear that they can't hold back these advances for much longer, Brendon squeezes Spencer's hand, blocks out sound, and breaks away from their line-up. He starts with the guy he recognizes, the stronger of the two telekinetics. He says into this guy's head, Why are you doing this? We knew each other at school, dude. Why are you trying to hurt me and my friends?

The guy's thoughts are filled at first with repetitions of this idea, Why am I doing this? This is followed up quickly with reassurances, It's my duty, to protect the universe from this dangerous fugitive. Brendon surmises quickly that at least some of Warner's supporters are only working as a result of Warner's suggestions. He sends this thought to Spencer, Jon, and Ryan, adding to the latter that he might have luck if he can get close enough to heal any of them. Spencer lets Brendon know that Warner has figured out that Brendon has found a way to resist him, so he's regrouping with his men to come up with a better plan.

Brendon glances over just as they leave their huddle, and then suddenly all of Warner's men run at their line from all directions. They are forced to let go of each other and spread out to keep the men away, and Warner immediately starts saying things to each of them. Brendon can't hear what Warner says, but Spencer turns to him with a threatening look, and Brendon starts to run, but then Ryan is there with a hand on Spencer's shoulder, and then Spencer snaps out of it. Brendon takes a moment to feel proud that Ryan has gotten so good at healing, but then Nick and De'Mar are throwing things in his direction and he has to go for cover.

Brendon, he suddenly hears in a voice he doesn't recognize. I'm on your side. I'm a telepath, but all I can do is send thoughts. Warner hasn't been able to recruit a telepath any stronger than me, and he keeps me on hoping that I'll get better at reading minds. Brendon glances up long enough to recognize Alex Suarez, one of the minions from their first visit to the ship. Pete and Anjela are on their way, just try to hold off Warner for a little bit longer.

Brendon can't quite process that fast enough, but Spencer is there saying, Look at Jon, and Jon is signaling for Brendon to read his thoughts, so Brendon darts around another box and breaks into Jon's mind. You and Ryan need to work together. I don't know how, but that's what's going to save us.

Brendon doesn't see how that is possible, as Ryan is currently darting around trying to heal everyone, but he stops to think for a second. Ryan concentrates hard, making the same methodical motions with each person he heals. Brendon suddenly has an idea, and he takes a deep breath, sends a warning at Ryan, and then runs out to meet him. All of Warner's minions are now gathered around one of their cargo boxes, trying to lift it by actual manual labor, so Brendon has a moment to explain to Ryan his plan.

I need you to concentrate hard on exactly what you do in your head whenever you heal someone. I'll read your thoughts and try to broadcast that back out into everyone's heads.

Ryan looks at him with wide eyes. Will that work?

Brendon shrugs. I have no idea. Are you ready?

Ryan nods before shutting his eyes in concentration. Brendon picks up the code of it instantly, knowing it by how it feels like another language, and he copies it as best he can and broadcasts it with no limitations. His head starts hurting immediately, but it works. The mania of people on their side - now multiplied because others have arrived - dies down, and they all pause. Warner's minions have managed to lift the box, but they stop suddenly. Warner keeps barking out orders, and Brendon can see a vein threatening to pop in his forehead. He broadcasts the same message again, and Warner's minions stop in their tracks again. It happens again and again, and it's almost comical, but Brendon starts to feel dizzy. He does the same thing again, feeling lightheaded, and he has a vague perception of Pete running at Warner, and suddenly there's all this noise, and Ryan shouts, "Brendon!" just before Brendon blacks out.

******

When Brendon blinks his eyes open, Ryan is hunched over him with Spencer and Jon right behind him. Jon is murmuring reassurances to keep trying into Ryan's ear, so Spencer is the first to see him awake. He pulls Brendon up into a hug, and Ryan makes a desperate happy noise and slumps against Brendon, bringing Jon with him. Brendon feels himself enveloped completely, and he feels completely at home in that moment.

"We should get back out there," Jon whispers. "It's over, but they want to see us."

Spencer supports Ryan's weight as they leave the ship, and Brendon worries. "Is he okay?" he asks Jon.

"Probably exhausted himself," Jon murmurs, slipping his arm around Brendon. "Are you okay?"

Brendon nods. "What happened?"

"You passed out, I guess from overdoing the whole psychic power thing. Before Pete could take Warner down, his guys managed to get one of our cargo boxes up and thrown at you and Ryan. It... it was pretty messy for a few minutes, before Ryan woke up."

Brendon sees the sadness in Jon's eyes and bumps his shoulder against Jon's. "I feel absolutely fine now," he assures him.

"Yeah, because Ryan overdid himself. I swear, sometimes I don't know what to do with you two."

Brendon is reminded of their argument earlier that afternoon, but that seems so far away now. "How long was I out?"

"Ten minutes? It seemed like forever. Spencer helped out the guys by figuring out who was being controlled against their will, but I was completely useless. I just sat there like a lump and waited for you to open your eyes."

"Hey," Ryan protests, and Brendon realizes he and Spencer have caught up with them. "Don't talk like that, Jon Walker. You're the reason I kept going for so long. We'd still be sitting there if you hadn't been there."

Brendon wraps his arms around Jon and hugs him tight. Jon chuckles and hugs back, obviously not in any hurry to join back with the group. Ryan rests his hand on the small of Brendon's back as they walk outside, and they're walking in this tangled up line when Brendon spots Anjela.

"Brendon!" she exclaims, and Brendon breaks free of his boys to pounce on her with a hug. "I'm so glad you're okay," she says. "I thought we weren't going to make it in time."

"What are you doing here?" Brendon can't help but ask. "Not that I'm not glad to see you! But uh, I wasn't exactly expecting you."

He sees Alex Suarez talking to Pete just behind where they're standing, and he really wishes he knew what was going on.

"It's kind of a long story," she says. "The short version is that Alex, Pete and I are all in business together."

"Doing what?" Brendon asks, mesmerized.

"Well, our first order of business was protecting you."

"You're kidding."

She laughs. "I wouldn't kid about that. But now, it seems that the Academy has come under new leadership," she says, smiling and indicating herself. "I think my first order of business is going to be changing up our post-graduation options. What do you think?"

Brendon stares at her, disbelieving, and then hugs her again. "I have a million questions, but first. How in the hell did you find me?" he asks, pulling away.

As if on cue, Pete strolls up to them and puts his arm companionably around Anjela's shoulders. "Hi."

"Pete?" Brendon asks Anjela warily.

"Pete Wentz, co-owner of Petenut Butter & Jelly Enterprises, at your service," Pete says, giving an elaborate bow.

"I can't believe we let you use that name," Alex says, approaching their group. "Hi," he says to Brendon, "I'm sorry for barging in on you earlier, but I figured what good am I as a spy if I don't encourage the good guys?"

"Wait a minute," Spencer says, coming up to them with Jon and Ryan in tow. "Slow down a second. You all work together?"

"Yes," Anjela says with a world-weary sigh. "I ran an underground system of businesses, Alex coordinated deliveries of non-perishable foods to planets in the Inner Periphery, and Pete decided to get us all working together. Actually, what is it that you actually do for PB&J?"

Pete narrows his eyes. "Customer relations and company expansion," he says, tone challenging. "Also I gave you both your cool nicknames."

"Yeah, you call me 'Butter.' Thanks for that," Alex says, rolling his eyes.

Brendon can do nothing but stare. "So you've been in charge of everything this whole time?" he asks Anjela.

She shrugs, unassuming. "If you got into any sort of trouble, it would've been my fault. I thought I'd look out for you."

"So you're the reason I wound up on the ship. The reason I met these guys," he says, gesturing at Ryan, Jon, and Spencer.

"Yes?" she says, unsure of his tone.

He beams at her, unable to resist hugging the life out of her one more time. "Thank you thank you thank you," he says, clinging.

She laughs softly. "I'm really glad you're happy, Brendon."

Brendon looks around at all the people still gathered from the fight, everyone that was willing to stand with him. "Yeah, me too."

******

That night, Brendon goes to Ryan first. Ryan tenses briefly in their bed, but gives up the charade immediately. "I thought I wasn't going to be strong enough."

Brendon makes a sympathetic noise and wraps himself tightly around Ryan. "Jon was there, though. He says he knew I'd make it."

Spencer slides into Brendon's thoughts with just a hint of a question, and Brendon tells him, Two minutes.

He uses those two minutes to bicker with Ryan and point out that he didn't actually have to fully heal Brendon, but Ryan won't hear that because he had to know that Brendon was gonna be okay, no waiting, no wondering. Spencer's hand on his back and Jon's voice in his ear were enough to help him keep trying.

"I'm sorry for what I said this morning," Ryan says quietly. "Even when you get on my nerves, I'm still crazy about you. That's why I get all worked up, because it's not fair that I can never really dislike you."

"Ryan, come on." Ryan blinks at him. "I think we're a life-changing fight away from that stupid argument, don't you?"

When Jon and Spencer come in, Brendon and Ryan are kissing, but not quite making out. Spencer wraps around Brendon while Jon does the same with Ryan, and then Spencer pushes up and cranes his neck to kiss Ryan softly. Spencer's sending out comforting thoughts, always easier when he's connected with Brendon, and Jon reaches across to rest one hand on Brendon's hip. "We're going to sleep now," he mumbles.

"Do you know that or are you just saying it?" Spencer says, but it lacks its usual bite.

Jon says, "You'll never know," and Ryan tightens his hold on Brendon's hand when Jon kisses the back of his neck.

"Are you guys pampering me because I was freaking out about the fight?" Ryan asks, annoyed.

Jon makes a shhh noise while Spencer shifts around to move his leg in between Brendon's and kick Ryan's ankle. He settles comfortably and doesn't move his leg.

Ryan starts to whine "Guys," but Brendon cuts him off mid-whine to say, "One of these days we are going to get so tangled up that we can't walk without each other."

There is a beat of silence, and then Jon says, "I think we already are."

Another beat, in which Brendon feels his heart swell, and then Ryan snorts and Spencer says, "Oh, that was deep, Jon."

Brendon turns his head to push his smile into the pillows, and he drifts off to sleep to the sound of laughter from the three dudes he loves.

THE END