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And Then I Was All Wet

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Crystal sat in one of the cast chairs, attempting to read lines. Her character, Dr. Carly Manning was dealing with some serious issues and she wanted to make sure to nail each scene. A few feet from her stood Judi, Shawn, Melissa and Wally having what appeared to be a very funny conversation. Judi was speaking, gesticulating animatedly causing the other three to burst into laughter. Judi boisterous laughter soon filled Crystal’s ears.

She looked at her script again, having no idea where she’d left off. She started reading again, only to hear her name called.

She looked up to see the group blowing her kisses. She laughed, reached up and made motions like she was catching their kisses and placing them on her cheeks. They all laughed and Crystal said, “Alright, you loons I’m trying to learn stuff here.” With a final flurry of kisses they turned back to their conversation and Crystal back to her lines.

Moments later, Crystal looked up, feeling eyes on her, and saw Judi looking at her. She raised an eyebrow and the blond winked at her before turning back around.

Before Crystal could think about it further, she was paged to the make-up room. She stood and began walking back but feeling eyes on her turned her head and caught out of the corner of her eye Judi quickly turning back around. “Huh,” she said to herself and resumed her course.

Several hours later, lunch was called, and her fellow cast mates went here and there, until she was left on the hospital set by herself. She could still hear some of the set people re-arranging things but here she was totally on her own. Crystal wasn’t hungry having consumed several massive cups of coffee throughout the day. She stood at the counter with the water bottle she had retrieved from her dressing room retweeting a couple of choice tweets and sending out some love and teases herself. She really loved her “sweet ones.” They were frequently a bright spot when the day was a little cray cray. She was so intent in her tweeting that she didn’t realize she was wasn’t alone, until she heard, “What’s Up Doc?”

Spinning around, she dropped her Droid to find Judi standing behind her trying not to laugh.

“Oh so funny, I just replaced this thing a few weeks ago!”

Still trying not to laugh, Judi said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you and your phone were having such a deep moment.”

“Oh laugh it up sister, we’ll see who gets the last laugh when I get you on my operating room table!”

Unable to hold it in any longer, Judi burst out laughing. “Are you propositioning me?”

“Well if I was, I’m not anymore!” Crystal said joining in with Judi’s laughter.

“Fine be that way, Dr. Carly’s looking a little uncertain and shaky these days anyway.”

“Dr. Carly may look shaky Crystal said but that’s just skillful acting.” “I however, am completely fuckmazing.”

“Oh baby, I believe that no question. I have kissed you before if you recall, more than once which was enough for me to know that,” the blond said.

“So long as we’re clear on that” Crystal said with a smirk.

“Clear, Crystal clear even.” Judi said.

“Groan.” Crystal said rolling her eyes. “Yeah I’ve never heard that one before.”

Judi laughed uproariously high fiving herself, singing, “Go Judi, it’s your birthday...” causing Crystal to guffaw and choke on her own spit. Coughing hard she was finally able to stop choking and not die from her own treacherous saliva.

“Alright aside from nearly dying that was funny, but yeah, never do it again!” Crystal said still red in the face.

“Hey its not my fault you can’t handle your saliva!” Judi said laughing even harder.

“Oh, really,” Crystal said acquiring a playfully menacing look and taking a step towards Judi.

“Now Crystal,” Judi said, “let’s not do anything rash.”

“Me, rash? I’d never do anything rash. Crazy maybe, but never rash,” she said with another step towards Judi. “I mean what could I really do to you with this lil’ ole water bottle?”

Judi backed up slowly. Crystal suddenly made a grab for Judi’s wrist. Judi just barely escaped Crystal’s grasp and ran around the large nurses’ station.

“As I was saying, let’s not do anything rash,” Judi said.

“And, as I said, I would never do anything rash. Why don’t you come over here and let me show you?”

Laughing, Judi said, “No way! I’m blond, but I’m not dumb. Who knows what you have in your diabolical mind?”

Crystal, who had been inching towards Judi the whole time, flashed a diabolical grin and moved one step closer. Judi ran to the other side once again and laughed, believing herself safe. Above them the bell rang alerting them to the end of lunch and they heard the set once again start to come to life.

“Looks like your plan has been foiled,” Judi said as she turned, hearing someone calling her name. As Judi turned to see who it was, Crystal ran around the station, and when Judi turned back hearing movement she received a stream of water out of Crystal’s water bottle directly into her face. Crystal burst into laughter, bent over at the waist her face bright red. The cast that was present stood momentarily shocked until they too burst into laughter.

Judi stood shocked and then began sputtering and coughing from the water up her nose. “CRYSTAL!” she said loudly.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry,” Crystal said trying to sound apologetic through her hysterical laughter.

“Sure, sure, Crystal. I can tell by your completely unabashed laughter that you are really, really sorry.”

“Alright, well maybe not sorry, but I didn’t intend for it to hit you full on in the face like that. But, hey, a money shot is a money shot!”

“Yeah, I got your money shot right here,” Judi said, flipping Crystal the bird.

Snickering under his breath, Wally walked up to Judi and said, “Was there a script change? I don’t recall the next scene calling for us to be so damp.”

Judi without missing a beat grabbed Crystal’s water bottle, sprayed Wally in the face, said, “Page twenty-seven Wally, at the bottom,” and walked haughtily off set leaving the roar of the cast’s laughter behind her.