Work Header

It was a simple day in sparda family

Work Text:

It was just a simple day in the sparda family.

As usual, it starts with the horrible noise coming out from Vergil and Dante's room.

"Shit," said Nico, who just came in ,"are they fucking or fightin'?"

"I don't know that there's a difference between them." Answered the only grown up man in sprada family, Nero. He seems to be lack of sleep because he spent all night cleaning up the mess made by his beloved father and uncle.

"Should we stop them, I mean, later?" Kyrie suggested softly. She looked worried and turned to Nero. The house may crack in any second ,"Or should we leave first?"she added carefully.

"I suggest that none of you should try to open that door unless it was opened inside ."a man's voice suddenly appeared in the dark at the corner of the room ."You would not like the way you end, believe me." The man in black hair walked out of the shadow with a book on his hand.

That's it , Nero thought, It's my house and I'm not letting these two old bastard ruin it again and again. I'm going to stop these. "Get out of my way V!" He shouted as he stepped forward and trying to open the door of these two's room.


meanwhile V looked at him as if he is an idiot. Your way? I am at the corner of the room, how am I supposed to be in your way?

Before V could finish his thought, the room door opened-- no, not opened, it was broken in pieces and throwned out. Obviously Nero didn't do this because something was also throwned out -- Sorry, someone, it was Dante.

And naked.

Kyrie cried out shyly and quickly covered her eyes. Nico commented "wow that's a huge size." V was still looking at his book quietly and Nero shouted:


"Thanks kid but no, I have just done one. "Dante grinned shamelessly.

"Don't you two have any humanity ?!?" Nero almost break out."My house, my door, and how dare you let Kyrie see this!" ("hey what about me" complained Nico)

"Hmmm humanity... I see your father's humanity standing there reading a book. What's for breakfast kid? " he stood up. "I'd like some pizza"


Someday i'll eventually get these two away from me, if I can't, i will just use the Red queen to stab myself. Nero sweared.

After Dante ordered some pizza and strawberry sundae with Nero’s money in the morning ( “I don’t have spare money” so Dante said) Morrison came in. "I've got job for you, Nero."

"Me? why not Dante? "Nero just wish that Dante could vanished, at least someone could keep him busy-- but not his father, not on bed in his home.

"Fine i'll take this anyway."Nero answered . It was all about supporting this shitty family. he thought."Wait Nero, "Nico shouted, "take this with you" she threw a robotic arm to him.

"Nico, I've got an arm now."He sighed, "No, no don't continue, i know that this is a work of art."

And after fixing some problems, Nero went home tiredly. And he had gone mad the first second he entered his house: Vergil and Dante was fighting, Vergil vanished then appeared at the back of Dante and shouted “DIE”with Yamato stabbing Dante, “slay all” he added. Dante too, using the Rebellion and went like “yee-ah”. The room was totally a mess, the table was in pieces and then Dante stepped on it again. The television was full of starches and the cotton inside sofa was all over the ground.

As a piece of cotton flew to Nero’s face, Nero kneeled down and let out a desperate shout:”WHERE IS MY RED QUEEN!!!”

It was just a simple day in the sparda family.