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The pain ran up his side and down his leg. A pain so absolute (but oh, so familiar) that Tony Stark could do nothing but go where Thanos pushed him. Backpeddling. Back, back. Until his knees hit something hard and he falls onto it. He sputters through the blood in his mouth as he gasps through the pain. Things are starting to fade out around him until a large hand settles on his head. It pets him for a moment, cradling his head and brushing fingers down his neck. Thanos is speaking to him and when Tony looks up he's shocked by the empathy he finds in Thanos' eyes. The way they scan Tony's face and track down his body for a second. Thanos says something about respect and all Tony can think about is the idea that billions of people are about to die because he wasn't good enough...-
"I hope they remember you." Genuine. Tony hissed with pain. He watches Thanos raise the Gauntlet, sees the colors on it light up. Tony remembers Steve, he remembers Pepper and Peter. And Rhodey and his bots. Natasha. Clint. Brucey. It's funny how the mind copes with death, Tony suspects it varies with each person. Whether it's a moment of happiness. Of regret. Of anger. Sadness. Self loathing. Tony feels all of these things at once. It threatens to push him down before Thanos can kill him. He just wanted to be better. He tried. But he's never been good enough.
Tony waits for the blast, waits for the end that he deserves. But when he refocuses again, Thanos is in front of him. Leaning into his space. Tony stills. Breathes narrowly through his teeth and watches him for a moment. His heart has stopped. He drops his gaze. The Mind Stone shines bright.
"Not good enough?" Thanos leans closer. Presses a large hand over Tony's wound. It doesn't sting anymore. He's lost far too much blood for that to be the case. Tony still flinches back from the touch, almost topples off the rock that he's on but Thanos holds his back. There's a distortion. A flash of light. Warm and inviting.
Images of his childhood, of Howard yelling at him. Howard struck him once or twice and Tony lets out a sob against his will. He's back in Afghanistan. The fear surges through him. The pain. The resignment to die. His head is held underwater and he inhales despite himself and the water floods his lungs, and he chokes on it, chokes on the fear -
"Stop it," Tony grates out. "Stop it!" Obadiah with his arm around Tony. The safety he felt around him after his parents had died. The night he took the reactor. The words he spat at Tony.
This is your legacy. Betrayal. Meeting Steve Rogers, being told he wasn't good enough. That he was a selfish cunt that could and would never sacrifice for others. New York. The wormhole. The missile that erupted and had him rattling in his suit. His panic attacks that followed. The nightmares. Working without sleep and food. Ultron. Guilt. Shame. The suits, the armor he put over himself. The hours of tinkering, the hours of inventing. The only times he found peace. Flashes of angry faces. At him. Pepper storming out. Steve's disapproving face as he slammed his shield into his suit on Siberia. Tony hated himself, he deserves to die.
He feels pathetic. Empty. Lonely. Desperate.
Then he feels nothing at all.
Tony gasped through the emotions that were building in his throat as the charred world came back into view. He can only bring a hand up and grip tightly onto a part of Thanos' wrist.
Just kill me. Just kill me. Just kill me, you coward. Thanos was still watching him. Thinking, no doubt. There are tears drying on Tony's face and he's too embarrassed to even try to wipe them away. Thanos has been watching the entire time. And he still kneeling too close to him, much too close for Tony to be comfortable. He shifts against Thanos' hand against his side. He's always had issues with being touched by an intent that wasn't duplicitous.
"Stark." Tony didn't look up. Instead, he fell forward, the world around him fading to black.
-
-
Thanos took him from Titan, he assumed. For when he woke up, he wasn't greeted by orange dirt. His side was releatively closed up, though there remained a scar. One Tony knew would never fade, a forever reminder of his failure. He ran his fingertips over the raised scar tissue. He never wanted to look at himself again. He had a right mind to put on his suit to destroy himself before anything happened. But his suit was damaged, the device encasing the nanoparticles was compromised. He took it off his chest, rotated it in his palm. All he needed was-
"You invented it." Tony jumped, unaware that Thanos has been standing with his arms crossed in the corner of this (quite large) room. Encased in his war armor, he walked towards Tony. Without his suit on he felt he looked like a fool. A tiny rat, even. Incapable of actually causing damage or threat. With each step Thanos took, Tony took two of his own backwards. Away, away. Anywhere but closer to Thanos.
"It's broken now," Tony says. His voice sounds more sure of himself than he feels. Right now he just feels inadequate.
"You've done enough, Stark." Tony pinches his face together, quickly turning from Thanos when bile rises up his throat. He's trying to comfort him. He'd rather run his balls over a cheese grater. In an instant, all the hair on the back of his neck stands on end. He turns slightly, and like before, Thanos is standing too close. Maybe it's an alien thing. Was personal space even a thing?
"I don't like being touched," are the first words that pass his lips and he wants to throw himself out into space. But he didn't know what else to say, didn't know if that was already a boundary that Tony had to set even though Thanos could crush him with one arm. Even though he was now, technically, a prisoner on Thanos' ship heading who knows where.
"Yes, I noticed."
Silence.
When Tony finally turns, Thanos is gone.
-
-
Tony repairs his armor. Thanos doesn't bother him, only occasionally venturing into his space to watch. Tony pretends he's not there. Pretends to not notice the glow of the Mind Stone, the constant intruding presence in his head, listening to his thought patterns as he worked.
-
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When Thanos told Tony that he was going to help him destroy a few planets, he lashed out. Impulsively and aggressively. Thanos had him immobolized with one hand to his chest in an instant. Pressed against the wall and Tony froze. He calmed his breathing, looked out at the floor below Thanos' arm. Blue filled his mind, and he was gone. Simply obeyed. Thanos puts his hand on Tony's head again. He has no choice but to allow it.
"What do you feel right now, Stark?"
"I don't feel anything." Thanos watches him doubtfully.
"Nothing at all?"
"Nothing that matters." A long pause. Thanos runs his fingers over his scalp. Still attempting to comfort. Tony wants to know why, but the thought is blocked. Discarded. He remains empty. The answer seems to be enough. He drops his hand from Tony's head.
-
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Thanos could venture straight to Earth if he wanted, but they stop on several planets to destroy and conquer. He put Tony with him at the front, powered to fight with the Mind Stone. Tony could see what he was doing. Could feel himself talking to his AI. Could see the blood spraying on his HUD. The red light blasts from his chest and palms. He flies up high and his targets are all held within a small yellow triangle and they're pinpointed. Then they're gone. He feels efficient and useful, and when it's all over and his mind is released, he crumples to the ground. Sobbing, holding onto himself off to the side of a house where no one could watch him. He sees the face of a screaming girl he'd pulled away from her mother before ripping her in half. He'd not dare take off his suit, the smell would shatter him. The smoke, the blood. The metal.
Thanos finds him none the less, and the look on his face makes it obvious he'd known where he was the entire time.
"You -" It's all Tony can choke out. He turns away, listening to the voice in his helmet.
"Breathe. Remember the doctor's words. Breathe in for one. Two. Three. Four. Hold for one. Two. Three. Four. Out for one. Two. Three. Four. Wiggle your fingers. Rotate your-" He does what he's told like clockwork, the voice calming him. It was familiar. Safe. Thanos is still behind him, but he hasn't moved. Like he's waiting for Tony's mental breakdown to pass.
"Why do you hide?" Tony feels his lips trembling, feels tears fall down his cheeks. His armor feels heavier than it ever has. Rage burns through his entire being. Tony lunges, but his mind washes out just as fast in another fade of blue. He stands there with his arms by his sides. Waiting.
"Take it off." Thanos says. Softly. More gentle than he ever has heard him. And Tony does, he recalls the suit to his body and it melts off of him. Thanos is close to him now. His eyes are tracking the path of where his suit disappeared but moments ago.
"Armor. Not only on the outside but on the inside." He says it like a revelation. A hand is on Tony's side. The same side he was stabbed in. Tony tilts his head up to look at Thanos.
"You invented this," Thanos repeats. "You invented it to hide." Tony doesn't respond because he can't. Because Thanos hasn't permitted him to. Tony can feel when something shifts in Thanos. His head lowers, his eyes narrow. He pulls Tony to him, lifts him from under his thigh and holds him to his chest. Tony barely rests his own hand on Thanos' forearm to stablize himself. There's a pull from all directions and they're back on the ship.
It becomes their first night together. Though together is relative, for all Tony can do is go where he is manuevered, moan like a whore and shiver. Thanos tongues Tony open, a pressure unrelenting even as he cums. Thanos knows what he's looking for, finding Tony's sweet spot deep inside him and curling his tongue around it until Tony arches against the sheets of what Tony assumes is Thanos' bed. Thanos doesn't take it further than that, but he doesn't let Tony rest until the sun is up. He's passionate, gentle and considerate. Finds what Tony likes, holds his legs open and traces an open mouth below Tony's balls before pushing his tongue back inside him. He squeezes around Thanos through his orgasms, and it only seems to encourage more ravenous attention. His hole is ruined. Wet, sloppy and overstimulated. There is no pain, only white hot pleasure and it consumes him as he's forced to release again and again onto himself and the bed under him.
Thanos hums against his skin, eyes lighting up when Tony starts to shake against his touch. At one point Tony can't breathe when Thanos starts moving his tongue like a mock dick inside his stomach. He can only gasp for breath while Thanos holds him onto his tongue as he cums hard enough that he can't keep his hips on the bed. When Tony is finally freed from the mind control, he can't move. He's plastered to the bed. He's so damn fed up. He aches all over. Slowly, his eyes adjust to the room and follow the screens set up on the walls to show the outside view from the ship. Light brims from a distance. Tony yearns.
Thanos wakes moments after he does, taking Tony in his hand and bringing him to several more orgasms with him held tight in his fist. Tony's too tired to fight it, too damn tired to do anything but let Thanos touch him. He still flinches at the contact, still jumps when Thanos runs his tongue over Tony's back.
"You were so good for me, last night." Thanos whispers into his ear. He purrs when Tony pulls at the semen slicked hand on his dick. Tony jerks when Thanos' very naked dick glides between his legs until Tony is practically resting on top of it. It juts out below him, thick, purple and long. His leg is lifted higher as Thanos moves against him. The hardness of his length rubs along his underside, rubbing against his ass and his balls. The pleasure of it builds quickly and Tony barely manages the strength to hold his own hand up to his mouth as he cums again. He shakes through the tightening of his body and his back arches almost to the point of pain from its intensity. Thanos praises him for it.
"You need this, pet." Thanos dips his tongue into Tony's ear at the same point that something enters Tony. It's not corporeal, at least he doesn't think it is. It's not Thanos, but it has to be some kind of power attached to him. The Reality Stone, perhaps? It still doesn't hurt, the stretch doesn't even burn as it slides in and out of him. It worms to his most sensitive place easily and caresses it. Works it back and forth and Tony still cums in hot, thick streams into Thanos' hand. Drips escape between Thanos' fingers and onto the sheets again. Tony suspects his miracle refractory period has to do with the Stones, Thanos himself or both. He wants it to stop, wants relief from the feeling of constantly releasing. But it's a long while before he's granted that mercy. Only when Tony chases his release with his hips, when he lets Thanos put his fingers in Tony's mouth. When he whines and gasps and his toes spread against one particularly strong orgasm does Thanos finally relent. Tony blinks once, twice. And there's a rush beneath his skin and he's cumming again instantly to the hand on his dick and the thrusting in his ass and the dick between his legs. Thanos holds him close, rides Tony through it with his hand and his constant strings of praise.
"So good for me. No one's ever had you like this." Tony starts to fade out. He can't even lift his head as he pants heavily into the air. "No hiding." He says these things until Tony falls asleep completely.
"You just need someone to take care of you, Tony."
-
-
Then it happens. Thanos does it; destroys half of all life. A snap of his fingers and it's done. Just like that. Tony stares and stares and at first glance, nothing seems to have changed. But the fear is there, the knowledge that not all the people he's come to know are still alive.
Thanos fingers him open that day, fucks Tony with them until he has released enough times that he cries. And cries. Thanos wipes his tears away even as new ones take their place, lowering Tony back onto his bed with his fingers still inside him. Tony wretches in shame and disgust as he cums into Thanos' mouth.
"Let it go," Thanos whispers against his thigh. Comforting him. Again. He holds Tony to him, rips his soul open with a raging pleasure as he sobs. He holds Tony until he forgets. If only for a moment.
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"You won't fit, you won't fit-" But there are flecks of red in his vision that Tony is starting to recognize as the power of the Stones and Thanos is pushing into his body. Nothing hurts, nothing tears. His body just gives. The air pushes out of his lungs and somehow pleasure bursts through his body. Thanos is petting his abdomen slowly, massaging the skin there as he listened to Tony pant.
"You'll break me," Tony rasps out. And it wasn't to require sympathy, no. If anything the words were laced with satisfaction. Anything to know he wouldn't be here with this monster any longer. Thanos' mouth is on his neck now, open and hot. He lathers Tony's skin with his tongue back and forth as he hums. It was a sound he made when he was satisfied. Tony's thighs are spread open as he rests in Thanos' lap, his arms are bound tight behind his back. His fingers can only twitch, and they brush against the warm skin of Thanos' stomach.
"I won't," Thanos says softly. And Tony hates that. How he fucking hates that Thanos talks to him like this. In a voice that says that Tony went willingly, that Tony wants this. That Thanos wants him. He can't, Thanos can't. He's not capable of that, no matter if he thinks Tony is the smartest of his species or not. He was a fucking madman who destroyed half the universe, who saw others as lower than him. Tony could never be an equal, not in this timeline or any other Strange may have seen. Because he was sitting in Thanos' lap with a dick up his ass and arms tied behind his back. Not exactly a consensual lover's paradise.
"Your mind is constant, Stark." Spoken against his neck. Thoughtful. Quieter still. Thanos could probably (is probably) reading his mind. He can't even think in private, his body is certainly not his own-
The thrusting is slow, and Tony doesn't do any of the work. Thanos liked that control. A single hand at his hip, wrapped around tight enough to bruise normal human skin. But since Thanos took to him, nothing about these encounters are normal. But the pain doesn't come. He just burns hotter and it only takes a few teasing thrusts before Thanos pushes against that hot nerve in his body that has him arching. Tony does anything and everything he can to hold back his noises; the moans that do escape sound like he's in pain. He thinks of Hulk in a Christmas sweater, Steve with socks and sandals on and even Nat with ugly toes. Anything he can force his brain to conjure against his overwhelmed senses. It doesn't take long though for those images to fizzle out as too soon his body reaches the point where he's thrashing in Thanos' lap. The pleasure rolls through him, the first of many releases pulled from his body as he hunches forward from the force of it. Even after all this time, he still doesn't want Thanos to see his mouth open in exctasy. Or his eyes squeezed shut. Not if he can help it. Thanos lets it happen, lets Tony have the solitude he thinks he needs to get through this trauma. But Thanos never relents, never stops his movements and Tony can't hold back a long, shuddering moan as he's fucked through the haze. Thanos eventually pulls Tony back to his body using the chains binding him. He turns Tony's face to his own and Tony drops his gaze to Thanos' cheek before he makes eye contact. He doesn't want to look. He doesn't want to see what his expression holds.
"Why do you hide your face?" Laced again with curiosity and wonder as Tony shakes. He fights the pleasure in his gut that pulses in time with Thanos' dick. The pressure of being full and stretched apart remains within what he can handle. Too much so.
"Why do you feel the need to turn away? Does it make you feel in control somehow?" Thanos' fingers make a pass over Tony's chest where his arc reactor used to reside.
"You built weapons, you built a suit to protect you. Your empire was among the most powerful on Earth. Used to being in control and getting what you want, I presume." He's not even talking to Tony anymore. His dick jerks inside Tony instead, like he's aroused at knowing Tony Stark was in his lap. Not just a human. Tony Stark. Merchant of Death. Tony hoped he didn't take that name as seriously as he thinks he is.
"You use your influence to distract away from yourself." Tony's heart is pounding. Tony is pretty fucking smart, he'll give himself that. But Thanos is smarter than him in several ways. He's trying to figure Tony out. Answering his own questions with and endless stream of conciousness that he whispers into Tony's neck. Goosebumps form across his body. Tony doesn't know how to tell Thanos that there are better, more worthy people of his attention on Earth. That there were plenty of other humans that were better than Tony in every aspect.
"Stark." Tony doesn't look up. He closes his eyes against the rolling of Thanos' hips against his ass. His body lights up at a particular grind of hips, he tightens around Thanos. That's all Thanos needs, he fucks him against that spot deep inside as he feels fingers running through his hair again. It reminds Tony of when he was stabbed, of the endless fear of Thanos walking him backwards off the edge of the universe. The fear that he had failed and that he lost. He lost. It was his fault, he -
There's a mouth on his own and it's twice as large as his own, but it works his jaw open and there's a thick tongue in his mouth. It moves occasionally, but mostly it just rests on top of his own. It feels like it's halfway down his throat, feels much too long to be able to sit comfortably. But it is. Tony wants to bite it off, wants to spit it out on the ground. But his toes are curling, his thighs are jerking and he attempts one final weak pull at his restraints. Again his orgasm flows out of him, Thanos pulls him down to grind into his sweet spot, and his eyes shoot open. It's more intense than the last and Tony feels panic build in his chest. He swallows convulsively against the tongue in his mouth that slides further down his throat and there's a possessiveness about it that has Tony arching again, cumming in strong waves onto the ground.
He's shaking now, his body is a livewire. The touch of Thanos' hands against his thighs make him cry out into Thanos' mouth. Thanos is moving him, finally removing his lips from Tony's. Tony gasps for air, too lightheaded to do anything but let Thanos cradle his head as he moves him. He pulls away from it out of spite, but his forehead hits Thanos' chest. He's turned Tony so he's facing him now. Thanos chuckles.
"You don't let others treat you gently." Thoughtful pause. "That's too bad." But Tony shakes his head, thinks of Pepper. Her smiling face. In her perfection she kisses him on the nose. Listens to him ramble at two in the morning. Sure, she wasn't great at handling his panic outbursts and obsessive habits. But she tried. And she loved him. She loved -
"But she could never do this for you." Thanos tilts Tony's face to him. A rush of light and heat and Tony's cumming again, squeezing around Thanos. He shrieks as his cock twitches violently against Thanos' stomach, painting his purple skin with white slick. Thanos is running his other hand through Tony's hair, again, and Tony hears a satisfied 'haaaaaahhh' from Thanos' lips as the tenderness of the touch makes him tighten around Thanos again.
"Look at me." Tony can't give him that satisfaction, it's the last thing he can fight. At least for today. "Stark." Thanos is still asking. Tony hates him more for asking. He was going to have to make him. And he does, there's a cloud of blue from the corners of his vision and he's looking at Thanos.
Thanos is watching him more intently. Like he wants to know what Tony wants.
"Stop it. Stop that-" But Thanos is in his mind, shuffling through his memories and his desires. Tony doesn't want it, gods he doesn't want it. But it's euphoria, it explodes within him. Thanos fucks him through an orgasm that won't stop, prolonged by Thanos' cruelty. Another way to comfort him, perhaps? Tony's body goes slack, his dick releasing in rhythmic pulses against Thanos' skin. He can only watch with an open mouth at Thanos' slowly rising chest, his semen running down Thanos' skin. He would feel shame if he could, the sight of it enough to turn even the most sexually experienced person's face red.
But there's no room for that in what he feels in this instant. Thanos holds the back of his neck, pushes up into his body. He shows Tony visions of the future, of life prospering. He shows Tony that everyone will move on from this because they'll have to. He shows Tony the sunsets on a thousand planets, trees blooming on twice as many and waters flowing freely and plenty. He shows Tony an image of what Tony looks like in this moment. He doesn't even realize he's been holding Thanos' gaze until he shows him. The view shows his open mouth, his shaking thighs as his orgasm continues to pulse from him unabated against Thanos' body. His release is flowing down Thanos' legs now, running down the side of his chair. His throne. He looks like the greatest prize. At least that's what Thanos shows him. His head is fuzzy, he doesn't feel attached to his own body anymore. Not with this never ending, never peaking pleasure thrumming through his entire being. It won't stop, it doesn't stop. It may never stop. Thanos holds him tight in his fist now, jerking his still leaking cock past the point of no return. He jerks against the touch as it takes him higher, to a place where he feels loved and he feels whole again. He sees everyone's faces and they smile at him. He smiles back.
Thanos watches Tony. Holds his head with care. Tony hasn't looked away from him, its the longest he's ever held his gaze. He trembles against him, and Thanos wonders idly if he's pushed his human body past what it can handle. Tony's spunk floods from between his fingers, his cock working in and out of his now willing body as his hole continues to clench through his bliss. Tony's eyes have glazed over completely. Tony smiles at him. Teeth and all and Thanos plans to keep it there, no matter the cost.
He's never cared about the cost.