Work Text:
Love was as foreign to Gojyo as the concept of recycling. How was he supposed to know how to sort through what was supposed to be trash and what wasn’t? No one had ever taught him or even suggested that it was an option.
Until Hakkai.
“Did you sort the recycling for when we go into town?” Hakkai asked took the dinner dishes to the sink.
“Why do we gotta do this every time?” Gojyo complained.
Hakkai sighed. Not long ago he had taken the time to sit him down and explain what was recyclable and what he could throw away.
“We have to protect our planet, Gojyo. We live here and we have to care for it. Most things can be given a second chance to have a use again.”
He gave Gojyo’s growing pile of garbage on the table a pointed look saying “Now clean up your trash, please” until Gojyo begrudgingly picked it up and sorted it under Hakkai’s watchful eye.
“’Kay, ‘Kai,” Gojyo said, rolling his eyes, although seriously. As much as it was a pain, Gojyo did enjoy learning from Hakkai. Hakkai didn’t just dismiss his thoughts and feelings and made him feel like he mattered. For the first time, he thought maybe he could have something more than a friendship with Hakkai.
It’s not that Gojyo had never had the hots for a guy before, but nothing like this. Nothing like the feeling of acceptance he got from Hakkai. The feeling like he finally belonged somewhere and to somebody. He’d only know the guy for two years but That someone would care and wouldn’t mind his issues and damage. He could still be reused, recycled.
Gojyo watched Hakkai as he began to wash the dishes. He rose to go stand next to Hakkai. “Thanks for dinner,” he said.
Hakkai looked at him. “You’re welcome.” It wasn’t like Gojyo to sounds so serious.
Gojyo set his hand on the small of Hakkai’s back. He drew closer, studying Hakkai’s face. “You know what you said about stuff getting a chance to be reused?”
“Yes?” Hakkai answered, not sure where Gojyo was going with this.
“Think that’s true about people?”
“Do you mean if people can be reused?” Hakkai asked, confused. “I don’t think people work quiet like that.”
“Nah, like feelings for people,” Gojyo explained. “Like if you like someone and you can put all of the feelings you felt for other people and put it into your feelings for one person.”
“I suppose that makes sense,” Hakkai said, thinking. “Why do you ask?”
“Because I- I kinda like you a lot,” Gojyo said, before kissing Hakkai on the bravery of the confession.
Hakkai stepped back sharply. He could see the crumbling hurt look on Gojyo’s face, but all Hakkai could think about was that he wasn’t worthy of Gojyo’s love. He had discarded his heart after Kanan and a murderer like him did not deserve a second chance.
“I’m sorry,” he stammered, abruptly leaving the kitchen and Gojyo.
~~~
A while later, Gojyo had found Hakkai outside looking at the moon in a thin sweater. The trees cast cool shadows on the glittering snow. The earlier snowfall had wiped away all traces of the path, leaving the world like new.
“What’ch’a doing?” Gojyo asked as plopped down next to Hakkai.
Hakkai glanced at Gojyo before sighing. “Do you ever wonder if we only ever have one purpose and everything before that is just waiting to serve that function, and after that is just meaningless?”
“No,” Gojyo said simply, lighting a cigarette. He had really screwed this one up. Probably reminded Hakkai of Kanan and he wanted nothing to do Gojyo now. “Look, if this is about before, I’m sorry I kissed ya. You can just forget it.”
“I don’t want to, though.” Hakkai looked down at his hands, pale in the moonlight. “I won’t deny you took me by surprise, but…it wasn’t bad. I just- I wasn’t sure I could give you my love.”
Gojyo’s stomach dropped.
“But, I want to try, if you let me.”
Hope burst in Gojyo’s chest. “More than anything,” he whispered, a little in awe that Hakkai did actually want to give him a chance to prove he can be good.
Hakkai smiled, but shivered in the cool night air.
“Here, take my jacket.” Gojyo slipped it off, draping it around Hakkai’s shoulders, the cold creating goose bumps on Gojyo’s skin.
“You’ll freeze now,” Hakkai commented, seeing Gojyo shiver in his thin t-shirt. He slipped his hand into Gojyo’s before Gojyo slipped his arm around Hakkai’s shoulder, transferring his other hand into Hakkai’s.
“You can warm me up.” Gojyo grinned.
Hakkai took a deep breath of the leather of Gojyo’s jacket and the cigarette smoke that had seeped into the worn fleece on the inside. Maybe it wasn’t so bad to give into this. Maybe he could actually allow himself to love again. He’d been given a second chance and was to give his heart a new life. Hakkai had been remade out of the scraps of what was left of Gonou and was given a new purpose. Why not fully give his heart over to the man who had saved his life in more than a physical sense? Gojyo’s cold nose against his jaw brought him out of his thoughts.
Gojyo slipped his cold fingers under the hem of Hakkai’s shirt, seeking the warmth of his skin.
Hakkai gasped at the sharp sting of Gojyo’s hand, at which Gojyo smiled sheepishly.
“Your hands are freezing,” Hakkai laughed as he pulled his shirt down.
“Not fair, ‘Kai.” He grinned. “You said you would warm me up.”
“Maybe you should have thought about that before you took off your coat.” Hakkai said with smile playing on his lips.
Gojyo huffed, his breath dissipating in the air, before shoving his icicle hands directly up Hakkai’s shirt, biting the tip of his tongue in a mischievous smile. Hakkai squirmed next to him. “Gojyo!” He chided, laughing. He was cut off from further lecturing by Gojyo’s lips on his. He parted his lips for Gojyo to slip in his tongue.
His roguish roommate carded a cold hand through his hair. Hakkai leaned into the touch, while Gojyo’s other hand roamed a little. Hakkai didn’t necessarily mind his chilly fingers, just glad to have the moment of contact. He hadn’t felt like this with anyone since Kanan, the gentle touches and insistent hands.
A gust of icy wind blew through them. “Let’s take this inside,” Hakkai suggested, pushing Gojyo’s hands down but still holding them. He pulled Gojyo inside, shutting the door. They both slipped out of their shoes, and Hakkai pulled him by the hand back through the house to Hakkai’s room.
Gojyo paused before the door, “Wait, I’ll be right back.” He hurried to his room to snag the lube and a few condoms.
As Gojyo entered Hakkai’s room, Hakkai shut the door behind him. Gojyo gave him a hesitant smile. He still didn’t quite believe that Hakkai wanted him. “You sure you wanna do this? I mean-”
“Yes, I do,” Hakkai cut him off. He placed his hands on his hips, dragging him closer. “I very much do.”
Gojyo smiled before leaning in to kiss him, resting his hand on his neck and rubbing his thumb against his jaw.
Hakkai let Gojyo’s jacket fall to the floor, drawing Gojyo back towards the bed. Gojyo tossed the lube and condoms on the bed. “Now that we’re inside, I’m feeling a bit toasty.”
Gojyo grinned, dropping his hands to the hem of Hakkai’s sweater, this time not bothering to tease it. Once the sweater was over Hakkai’s head and off his arms, Gojyo kissed him deeply before breaking it to gently push Hakkai down into the neatly made bed. Hakkai complied. Gojyo leaned in close, his warm breath fluttering against Hakkai’s neck. “You must be hot in those pants too.”
Gojyo dropped down in front of him, kissing his way down his neck and chest, lower and lower, to undo his pants. Hakkai helped slide them off and started to fold them before Gojyo grabbed them and tossed them aside. “You seem over dressed now,” Hakkai smiled, raised a teasing eyebrow.
“You know I’m always hot,” Gojyo smirked, already pulling off his tank top. He made short work of his pants and boxers as well, standing in front of Hakkai, with his hands on his hips. Hakkai couldn’t help but be amused by his posturing with his cock only half hard.
“Oh, come here,” Hakkai laughed, scooting back to lie on the bed.
“I intend to,” Gojyo grinned playfully, crawling up over Hakkai to sit, straddling his lap, kissing him and grinding down against Hakkai’s hips.
Hakkai reached up to push some of Gojyo’s hair behind his ear. He blushed as he admitted, “I must confess, you would be the first man I’ve been with.”
“That’s okay, I can treat you right,” Gojyo murmerd, sliding one hand down to palm Hakkai’s crotch before slipping his hands under the waistband to run his hand along the length of Hakkai’s penis as he pulled it out.
Hakkai gasped a little, grabbing Gojyo’s hips. “I have no doubt.”
Gojyo tugged Hakkai’s briefs down the rest of the way with Hakkai’s help and sent them to join the rest of their clothes on the floor.
Gojyo reached up to grab the lube. He squeezed some onto his fingers, reaching back and probing his own ass with the first knuckle of his forefinger. Hakkai watched as Gojyo began to prep himself, taking Gojyo’s cock in hand and giving it a few strokes. Gojyo’s breath to shuddered, his eyes blinking closed.
Gojyo added another finger before pulling out entirely. “You wanna?” He breathed. Hakkai nodded, his face flushed, and Gojyo grabbed the bottle of lube again. This time he squeezed some on Hakkai’s fingers. Gojyo took Hakkai’s hand and lined it up. “No more than two for right now.” Hakkai gently inserted his fingers, taking Gojyo’s directions and began to stretch the ring of muscle.
Under Gojyo’s instruction, he curled his fingers, leaving Gojyo breathless. Hakkai found that spot again just to watch Gojyo’s flushed grin melt with bliss. Gojyo’s little gasps and pants warmed Hakkai through.
Gojyo gripped the sheets beside Hakkai’s head, leaning forward to kiss him between spikes of pleasure.
Soon Gojyo gave the okay to add another finger, starting to roll his hips and push back against Hakkai’s hand.
Hakkai removed his fingers as Gojyo grabbed the condom, expertly unrolling it down Hakkai’s cock. He gave it a light squeeze before sitting back on top of Hakkai. Gojyo lined himself up and slowly sank down.
Hakkai groaned at Gojyo’s tight warmth. “Gojyo,” he breathed.
“Don’t move yet.” Adjusting to Hakkai’s dick, Gojyo lowered himself a little further before he started to roll his hips, eliciting gasps and sighs from Hakkai. “Feel good?” he asked.
Hakkai nodded, barely able pant a yes. Gojyo picked up the pace as Hakkai began to thrust up in time with him. Leaning forward, Gojyo kissed Hakkai, nibbling his nether lip. “Touch me,” he whispered.
Hakkai took Gojyo in hand, stroking and gliding his hand along Gojyo’s length. Hakkai felt the rumble of pleasure in Gojyo chest. Swiping his thumb over the head of Gojyo dick, Hakkai reveled in look of pure ecstasy on Gojyo’s face, the dim light of the room, casting shadows across his face. Red tendrils clung to Gojyo’s face. He did it again and Gojyo tossed his head back, groaning and clenching around Hakkai.
That was enough to make Hakkai lose his measured pace and begin to thrust with abandon.
“Close?” Gojyo asked.
Hakkai nodded.
“Me too.”
They fell out of rhythm and before long, Hakkai came and Gojyo was quick to follow. Gojyo leaned forward to give Hakkai a kiss, the curtain of red surrounding them. “You were great,” Gojyo said between gentle kisses.
“So are you.” Hakkai smiled.
Gojyo carefully let Hakkai pull out and rolled to the side. They both lay there for a moment before Hakkai began to clean them up. He tossed the condom and came back to bed. He slipped in beside Gojyo, who immediately put an arm around Hakkai.
“Are you cool with whatever this is?” Gojyo asked, a little self-consciously. He forced himself to watch Hakkai’s face to see his reaction.
Hakkai couldn’t imagine living with anyone else now. This moment, wrapped in Gojyo’s arms, held more peace for him than he had ever felt in his life. He would make the most of this new life and chance, his best friend at his side and in his arms.
“Yes,” Hakkai said, brushing some hair out of Gojyo’s face. “More than anything.”