BA2422
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Summary
It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there… killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.
This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.
When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.
How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part…)?
Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 250,248
- Chapters:
- 30/30
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 2,885
- Kudos:
- 7,092
- Bookmarks:
- 4,185
- Hits:
- 496,799
Bookmarked by BA2422
04 Jun 2026
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THE BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC SERIES by WhatMurdah
Fandom Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
19 Oct 2025
- Words:
- 368,861
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 249
Bookmarked by BA2422
31 May 2026
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- Words:
- 147,802
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 367
Bookmarked by BA2422
29 May 2026
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Summary
Draco is a single dad trying to raise a teenager on his own. When he notices his son's newfound interest in girls, he takes it upon himself to give him some fatherly advice. Little does he know that his son's crush is none other than his own childhood nemesis, who has taken up the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor at Hogwarts. Draco tries to juggle awkward situations, parenthood, and his own budding interest in Hermione Granger. COMPLETE!
Finalist for "After All This Time?" Spring 2017 Dramione Fanfiction Awards for "Best Fluffy/Humor Fic"
WINNER for Best Comedy, Summer 2017 Enchanted Awards!
WINNER for Best Professor Era fic, 2018 Granger Enchanted Awards!
WINNER for Best Professor Era fic, 2018 Beyond the Nook Fanfiction Awards!Series
- Part 1 of This Is Everything
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 61,722
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Comments:
- 2,252
- Kudos:
- 12,143
- Bookmarks:
- 3,942
- Hits:
- 490,064
Bookmarked by BA2422
28 May 2026
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Summary
How did it feel? It felt like he was barely holding it together. She, of all people, should shun him. Or yell at him. Curse him. Spit at him. Take out her wand and blast him off the face of the earth. It was crushing guilt and relief and confusion all at once when he looked at Hermione Granger.
The monotony of Draco’s daily routine had become both a lifeline and a noose. But this new habit of grabbing coffee with Hermione Granger is quickly becoming a reason to get out of bed and is unfortunately forcing him to re-evaluate his inconsequential existence.
Hermione is living her life in fragments, separate pieces scattered about, and she can’t find a way to step back and let the full picture form. Why are morning meetings with Draco Malfoy the only thing that make sense anymore?Series
- Part 1 of Spectrum
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 312,286
- Chapters:
- 51/51
- Collections:
- 155
- Comments:
- 9,807
- Kudos:
- 37,321
- Bookmarks:
- 15,765
- Hits:
- 2,927,493
Bookmarked by BA2422
27 May 2026