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  1. Tags
    Summary

    An omfd SMAU by @blu3dan13l

    number neighbours: A number neighbor is someone who has the same phone number as you, except the last digit is one lower or higher (dictionary.com)

    (copied over from twitter)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,213
    Chapters:
    22/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    38
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    254
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Edward Teach is a fashion model who has seen and tasted everything. Probably too many things.

    Stede Bonnet made a name for himself as one of the greatest therapist in LA.

    Stede knows how to help people. Edward stopped asking for help a long time ago.

     

    OFMD SMAU crossposted from twitter (@Braintrotmess), Updated max once a day here, but I'm more active on Twitter.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,611
    Chapters:
    205/?
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    76
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    2045
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Stede’s employees have decided to drag him along to a concert to cheer him up from his (supposedly) awful divorce. Instead, he finds himself anxious and overwhelmed, hiding out in a public restroom.

    In walks Edward Teach, band member of The Queen Anne’s Revenge. One conversation, a pair of earplugs, and a makeshift backstage pass later: Stede has found he’s captured the attention of the infamous rock legend Blackbeard.

    Not that he’s complaining. It turns out that the man is absolutely lovely.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,458
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    117
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    1019
  4. Tags
    Summary

    "You can't just leave every time there's a problem."
    "And you can't hurt people every time you feel hurt. "
    Both regretted the words as soon as they'd said them. The words stung, but the most hurtful thing about them was that they were unequivocally true, and neither one could refute that.
    or: Picking up from the end of season 1, Ed and Stede reunite. Both need to make amends- and learn how to love each other again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,718
    Chapters:
    7/12
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    68
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    1417
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Jim is working on an escape plan but gets distracted by Izzy

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,480
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    244
  6. Tags
    Summary

    The 80s are in full swing, and the golden decade of Nintendo Gameboys’ and Sony Walkmans’ has never looked better. In the neon jungle, Stede Bonnet, a young salaryman, meets enigmatic mechanic apprentice Edward Teach, and the pair strike up an unlikely friendship via fax machine, page beepers and gifts in the mail.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,349
    Chapters:
    71/?
    Comments:
    1009
    Kudos:
    1305
    Bookmarks:
    391
    Hits:
    18759
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Edward Teach, meteorólogo y Stede Bonnet, bibliotecario, se conocieron en una boda de forma extraordinaria. Y a partir de ahí sus vidas ya no fueron ordinarias.

    Una historia sobre bodas, expectativas, casi nada de docencia, clichés y tonterías.

    Language:
    Español
    Words:
    2,992
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    10
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Izzy was actually good at controlling his temper, if that can be believed. Any anger that spilled over was, in his opinion, well deserved. Holding himself perfectly still for a count of five, hissing his breath out slowly, had saved more lives of incompetent sailors that anyone would ever know.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,627
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    72
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    332
  9. Tags
    Summary

    This fic is the slowest of slow burns. It was intentionally written to build gradually as a cohesive narrative that expands over time because you can't get a good emotional release without FOREPLAY.

    What if Ed didn't go full 'Evil-Ed' post Stede? How would Izzy react to an Ed that still wasn't quite right even though Bonnet was gone?

    What would it be like if they thought Stede Bonnet was fucking dead, but then he wasn't?

    Themes include: grief, loss, guilt, forgiveness, hurting people you love, healing, backsliding, the effects of childhood trauma, consent, power dynamics.

    There will be no themes of sexual assault/violence in excess of the show.

    I'm not over tagging this jawn because I don't want to spoil the whole story ahead of time. Where's the fun if you know half of what you can expect from the tags alone. Don't you just want to let a story unfold, friend?

    Fuck counter: 237 fucks (I mean the word. They haven't fucked 237 times. That would be ludicrous)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    88,247
    Chapters:
    54/?
    Comments:
    404
    Kudos:
    366
    Bookmarks:
    59
    Hits:
    10111
  10. Tags
    Summary

    *Explicit cut scene uploaded! Jump to the extended scene from chapter 14 of Their Flag Meant Death. This is the companion work to the long-form fanfiction Their Flag Meant Death. It will include the explicit material and epilogue, as well as anything else I feel like.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,913
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    470
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Stede Bonnet has chosen the town of Dos Corazones for his mid-life crisis. He came because there was a tall ship for sale, and he's always dreamed of owning one. The ship he buys has a sordid past - one he's initially unaware of. All its previous owners have been pushed out of town before the ship ever set sail.

    One night at a party, he meets a man named Ed who owns the bar across the street. The two form an instant connection, but they're about to find themselves on opposite sides of a struggle to control the town's future.

    ---
    This story was formerly Gentleman Pirate Tours. I've renamed it because that implied a straightforward romance, when it's more of a small town with a secret vibe. Mystery. Infidelity. Crime. Skeletons in the closet. And two men who find a connection that threatens to burn them all down.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,456
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    258
  12. Tags
    Summary

    The last person Lucius expected to save him from uncertain death at the hands of Blackbeard was Blackbeard's even more obnoxious first mate. Now, trapped inside the cabin of a man who seemed to hate him, with a crazy captain running around, half a crew trying desperately to keep afloat the ship, and not even a change of pants...

    Yeah, getting out of this situation was going to take every bit of ingenuity he had left in him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,765
    Chapters:
    7/21
    Comments:
    194
    Kudos:
    159
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    2193
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Picks up after Stede finds the revenge again, confronts the kraken, and tries to fix what they had.
    To be honest guys it’s a lot of fluff and little plot besides these boys healing and exploring each other.
    Very explicit in later chapters 🥰

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,172
    Chapters:
    3/6
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    158
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Stede is a divorced, gay, divorce lawyer. He is dreading his upcoming class reunion since the Badmintons (because of fucking course) are running bets on him arriving alone and pathetic to the celebration dinner.
    Enter Ed Teach, long-time columnist for Hornygold, a gay lifestyle and entertainment magazine with some very interesting centerfold pictures. Ed is tasked to woo new sponsors for the magazine with an article about relationships.

    Ed runs into Stede and hijinks ensue. There will be a happy ending, of course ;)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,335
    Chapters:
    43/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    113
    Kudos:
    132
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    2674
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Based on this tweet: https://twitter.com/TaraWineQueen/status/1537900442566262784 . ‘Cuz Stede would love a Book Bar, methinks.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,661
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    145
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Ed, Izzy, Fang, and Ivan make up the London-based rock band Kraken, which rocketed to fame in the 1990s. When ballad singer Stede Bonnet reaches out about a collaboration, Izzy has to work with Bonnet's songwriter, an overeager composer named Lucius, to write something that aging rockstar Ed and new-on-the-scene Stede can perform together.

    What's worse is that Lucius is utterly obsessed with a mysterious songwriter called Basilica, a faceless, genderless musician—and he has no idea that Izzy and Basilica are the same person.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,026
    Chapters:
    1/4
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    163
  17. Tags
    Summary

    When Izzy got his captain back, he truly thought things would go back to normal. Instead, he found himself obeying orders to take on more and more violent crew members. The men that the Kraken’s reputation had drawn to their crew were men who fought for the enjoyment of the kill, not as a means to fame and fortune.

    And now, Izzy was in a hell of his own making.

    These new men were nearly unmanageable. Their need for violence unquenchable. Now, Izzy was forced to protect his captain, and the four idiots who were possibly still in Edward's corner, from both the Kraken and his deadly crew. All while attempting to ignore the sudden case of FEELINGS that he seemed to be developing most unexpectedly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    35,415
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    158
    Kudos:
    186
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    2477
  18. Tags
    Summary

    A man's mid-life crisis and failing marriage lead him to follow a dream of his and open a coffee shop - something he's wholly unqualified to do. He finds family in his rag-tag team of employees, and love in the most unexpected of places.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,486
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    96
    Kudos:
    105
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    1187
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Morden AU. Stede owns a bookstore and Ed is the head coach of a swim team at the local pool. Mary pushes Stede to ask out the sexy coach from their kids' swim practices. Having only gone out with four people in the last three years of their divorce, Stede is a little rusty when it comes to dating. This is the story of Ed and Stede’s summer romance.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,820
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    78
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Edward Teach is an experienced restauranteur beloved by his community, Stede Bonnet is an eccentric librarian with an eye for adventure. When the pandemic puts them both out of work, they develop a close online relationship and bond over their experience as middle-aged queer men.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,284
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    60
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    623

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