1 - 20 of 3631 Works in Jake English/Dirk Strider

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Meat Horse is something that came to you in the second week of class, a testament to the crazy old gods of the sodomite country of ancient Greece. You chronicle the life and times of the titular Meat Horse as he is hunted by the Flesh Bear. For one hour on Tuesdays and Thursdays you are a regular Homer. It’s the only outlet for all that teen angst you left simmering during high school under the impression that you would end up at some tech institute where you could get pounded up the ass by some dl guy who would’ve bullied you in high school, or some otter who would leave you with nothing but the taste of musky balls on your tongue. You are a failure to launch. You were your shit family’s only effort to get a piece of them from rotting and dying in Skaia, and now you are here, dying away at some community college waiting for the opportunity to transfer.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,909
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    23
  2. Tags
    Summary

    During a particular depressing night after work, Jake is visited by a familiar stranger and finds himself reminiscing over their complicated history, as well as their last encounter.

    Dirk is more than happy to remind him all that he's forgotten.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,747
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    85
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Your eyes finally focus in the dark and oh god that isn't a dog. Two trolls sit in front of you, one awake and one that looks genuinely dead. You back up a little bit, moving from your crouched position. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. There are usually dogs back here and-"

    "Can we still have some jerky?"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,027
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    37
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Dave Strider wanted to be a normal teenager. That plan got fucked up when he was five. But he went on with life, living like the cool kid he is, with no care in the world. Until he trips world famous actor, Karkat Vantas and starts a dating scandal. And when Karkat's manager tells him the only solution is for them to fake date for the press? Yeah, that whole normal plan was never going to happen. Dave could fake date an actor he's had a crush on since he was thirteen, totally. There'd be no problems with this plan.

    Throw in an abusive Bro, a traitor brother, a comatose stranger, dramatic breakups and more, and Dave is way in over his head.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    104,819
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    122
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1690
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is DIRK STRIDER and you are THIRTEEN YEARS OLD. You are currently seated in perhaps the last place you expected to end up this evening, a semi-private LABOR AND DELIVERY ROOM in the maternity wing of your local hospital. Beneath your legs is an uncomfortable VINYL ARMCHAIR, and on top of them is a small BLANKETED BUNDLE. This bundle contains a warm, squirmy little neonatal human who just so happens to be your brand-new BABY BROTHER. What will you do?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,634
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    102
    Kudos:
    144
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1762
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk Strider is a scientist working on a groundbreaking AI project at Aperture Laboratories. What could possibly go wrong?

    Turns out, the answer is "a lot."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,096
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    51
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    412
  7. Tags
    Summary

    It's been almost four years since John Egbert and his friends completed their conjoined game of Sburb. Since then John has become depressed and reclusive, rarely even leaving his house. One evening however, a chance conversation with a friend allows John to see and experience what had been missing from his(?) life for so long.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,354
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    66
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1370
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Karkat escapes Alternia with the help of his friends, and he crashes his ship on a planet called Earth. A human named Dave Strider takes him in and helps him navigate the planet.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    46,813
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    97
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    1336
  9. Tags
    Summary

    In an AU where the Alpha Kids are all 15 by the year 2021, Pesterchum isn't the only (and far from the best) online chat app out there. This is the story of their first meeting -- in a Discord chatroom.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,857
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    74
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    700
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk Strider is one of the last survivors of Outcast society, living nomadically in the long-abandoned urban wastelands outside the walls of the Elite: the fast-advancing technological hub and corporate ruling class. After a series of airstrikes has devastated what little means he had to scrape by, he is left desperate to save his dying sister.

    Jake English is just trying to find the nerve to go outside.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    57,281
    Chapters:
    17/20
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    82
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    841
  11. Tags
    Summary

    [This story is part of the Cracks in the Crown series] [This is part 2]

    ♋︎ You thought you knew all there was to this seadweller. You’ve got some catching up to do.
    ♒︎️ You've spent a long time in solitude... it's about time you start to fight for yourself. You need to fight for you.

    https://bit.ly/2GxHlc5 (tunes to follow along chapter by chapter, highly recommended)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    221,115
    Chapters:
    48/50
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    210
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    6269
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Дейв не может точно сказать с чего это все началось. Может, с того момента, когда Дирк поздравил его с Рождеством и они стали чаще общаться, может с первого раза, как тот сыграл ему на гитаре, а может с теплых объятий, которые тот ему подарил - лучшие объятия в мире. Но сейчас это уже не важно. Важно лишь то, что тот любит его больше жизни, не надеясь на взаимность, и сейчас хочет с этой самой жизнью расстаться.

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    3,135
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    16
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Реквием по одиночеству.

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    378
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    8
  14. Tags
    Summary

    The shittiness of her teenage years mixed with her feelings and casual racism she faces are not good for Jane Crocker. If she’s supposed to live and open a bakery after graduation, why does she feel like she cant push on?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    666
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    15
  15. Tags
    Summary

    There was always some kind of love, in your relationship with him—a closeness, an intimacy, that you’ve never had with anybody else.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,743
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    27
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    388
  16. Tags
    Summary

    There really hasn’t ever been any romance in your life, and that’s, truly, okay. You’re fine with your life the way it is, most of the time. Usually. God tier stuff aside, you mean. Existential horror and loneliness aside, ha ha. Point is, you don’t feel the need to date anybody. Who would you even date?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    66,197
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    55
    Kudos:
    153
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    2040
  17. Tags
    Summary

    If your friends online ever get a hold of your playlists now it would be a fucking travesty.

    Jegus.

    You blame Jane of course, though she couldn’t have known what she was doing. ‘Look at this neat thing I found on Trollblr!!’ she typed, and there was so much pure, precious excitement in her bright blue text that you just had to open it up and play it right away. Pushover.

    Who knew it would be such a Pandora’s fucking box.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    531
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    66
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk and Jake go on an adventure in a cave and find themselves in a tight situation ;)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,528
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    238
  19. Tags
    Summary

    The Stri-Londes are magic users that have created their own coven of sorts, and have all partnered up and settled in, with the exception of Dirk. His siblings are tired of seeing him mope around, and devise a plan to summon the perfect love for Dirk; his soulmate, if you believe in that sort of thing.
    Jake English is quite the force to be reckoned with, despite the fact that he's certain he possesses no magic. He’s incredibly positive without meaning to be, and alarmingly charming for someone with no charm spells at their disposal. Not to mention he’s devilishly attractive and Dirk is a sucker for those bright eyes under those dark bangs. Something in the way Jake walks and talks and acts has Dirk thinking that this man was literally made for him.
    Is this apparent tulpa just a figment of his imagination, a machination of the magic done by his siblings, or could Jake really be Just That Perfect?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,059
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    222
  20. Tags
    Summary

    "But a dam breaking happens slowly, and then all at once. Little cracks that spiderweb outward across brick and concrete and stone, tiny jets of water warning of the impending crash - and then it bursts, a flood, rushing out with all the speed and fury a bottled river can muster. When you came to love them, you did so the same way - slowly, subtly, holding it back, and then all at once in a great rush."

    Or, Dirk loves with an intensity that hurts him - but also keeps him going. At least until he can enter SBURB and see them for real.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,110
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    8
    Hits:
    44

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