1 - 20 of 52 Works in Bret McKenzie

Pages Navigation

Listing Works

  1. Tags
    Summary

    Jemaine’s moan was almost as loud as Bret’s, and Bret’s mouth wasn’t full of cock.

    Dunno guys I have no excuse for this it’s just porn. Anyway enjoy sub Jemaine he’s the love of my life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,017
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    12
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    85
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Bret was almost positive at this point that Jemaine was having sex dreams about him. Really, there’s only so many times that you can hear your roommate moan your name in his sleep before you begin to wonder. It used to be a rare occurrence, maybe once in a few months, but lately it has become much more common. Once a week, probably. And God, this morning… Jemaine had been straight up writhing on the bed. It was enough to make anyone feel– well. Bret wasn’t exactly sure how he felt, but he definitely felt something, and he felt it a lot.

    Thank you to @FAE_M00NY and @alwaysaldrig on Twitter for the beta!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,733
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    60
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Murray falls head over heels for the new tech support woman, but why is Greg so weird about it?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    732
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    54
  4. Tags
    Summary

    No man, it isn't gay to hold hands. Or to cuddle while watching TV. Or to fall asleep in each other's arms. Or to kiss each other goodnight.... unless?

    Bret and Jemaine are already roommates, bandmates, and just regular mates. How long until their close friendship evolves into something more romantic? And then how long after that will it take for them to realize?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,720
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    34
    Hits:
    193
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Flight of the Conchords are a one-of-a-kind band. Or are they?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,450
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    93
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Bret hires Jemaine to be his ‘companion’.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    38,841
    Chapters:
    11/16
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    620
  7. Tags
    Summary

    This show deserves SO much more love and appreciation!! Starting off with my favourite boi :)

    (I do not own Flight of the Conchords or its characters, all rights go to creators.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,755
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    172
  8. Tags
    Summary

    “We’re starting to find a new audience now that we’re creatures of the night.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,129
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    34
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    132
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Jemaine and Bret are sick, so Murray brings them soup and Lord of the Rings. They debate how gay it is.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,374
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    304
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Jemaine starts to think about something that happened when him and Bret were fighting over Barbra

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    675
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Hits:
    247
  11. Tags
    Summary

    My attempt to write an episode of Flight of the Conchords.

    When Jemaine finds a cool new friend from New Zealand, Bret is jealous. But are Taika's intentions entirely honourable?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,942
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    325
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Murray's assigned the boys separate hotel rooms to stop them chatting into the night and nodding off on stage. Boredom and horniness leads to an interesting phone conversation.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,011
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    62
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    519
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Valentine cards from the boys that barely break canon.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    741
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    27
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    145
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Jemaine's favourite game threatens to make a band meeting very uncomfortable.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,998
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    398
  15. Tags
    Summary

    On tour, the boys feel frustrated. Murray knows what will perk them up.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,773
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    48
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    624
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Bret and Jemaine have very different perceptions of who's in control.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,624
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    417
  17. Tags
    Summary

    When Mel wins an ill-conceived competition to choose the theme for the Conchords' next music video, Murray pushes the boat out and flies them to Hawaii for a 'South Pacific' themed shoot.

    Thrust from Chinatown to Paradise, Bret and Jemaine get closer, Mel and Doug reconnect, and Murray practices his French.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,288
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    15
    Hits:
    174
  18. Tags
    Summary

    It's not gay if you're practicing for kissing girls.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,723
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    45
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    352
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Offered more money than he's ever seen before to pose for an eccentric artist who looks uncannily like Jemaine, Bret is drawn into a world of manipulation and perverse pleasure. But is it what he really wants?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,584
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    245
  20. Tags
    Summary

    The four stages of acceptance: Bed, Couch, Rambo, and Office. This fic was based loosely on the boys' idiosyncratic acceptance speeches for the Vodaphone New Zealand Music Awards (check them out here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7zXwRWcn0M).

    Reposted from Conchords Slash many moons ago when the world was young. Kids, don't molest people in their sleep. It's fun in completely made-up fanfic but it's assault in real life, m'kay?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,714
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    400

Filters

Filter results:
Submit

Include

?
Include Ratings
Include Warnings
Include Categories
Include Fandoms
Include Characters
Include Relationships
Include Additional Tags

Exclude

?
Exclude Ratings
Exclude Warnings
Exclude Categories
Exclude Fandoms
Exclude Characters
Exclude Relationships
Exclude Additional Tags

More Options

Crossovers
Completion Status
Word Count
Date Updated
Submit

Clear Filters

Pages Navigation